


The Galaxy Needs a Nerd

by enloeddmedia



Series: The Galaxy Needs a Nerd [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anxiety, Author is also a Nerd, Backwards dyad, Ben Cosplays, Ben Solo is a Mess, Ben Solo is a nerd, Ben has a heart of gold, Ben is a mama's boy, Ben is a walking disaster at first, Ben is so not a badass, Ben is the worst Jedi ever, Ben lives in his parents' basement, Ben the Inventor, Ben's afraid of everything, Ben's even afraid of Rey, But learns his lesson in chapter 8, Childbirth, Dramedy, Drunken Shenanigans, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Force Dyad (Star Wars), Genetic Disorders & Abnormalities, Han is mean at first, Han is the grumpiest dad ever, Han is tired of Ben's crap, Han needs to drink less Corellian whiskey, Happily Ever After, Happy Ending, Headaches & Migraines, Humor, Light Angst, Love Bites, Movie: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Oral Sex, POV Ben Solo, POV Rey (Star Wars), Past Child Abuse, Pregnancy, Premature Ejaculation, Promise even the scary stuff will work out fine, Rey is a badass, Rey is a former Space Pirate, Rey only seems mean at first, Rise of Skywalker Alternate Universe, Social Anxiety, Soft Ben Solo, That's what you get for cloning, Vaginal Sex, Virgin Ben Solo, You may need tissues at times but promise you'll laugh soon after, but grows into the hero he was always meant to be, cloning, mostly lighthearted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:36:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 190,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24063697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enloeddmedia/pseuds/enloeddmedia
Summary: Ultra-nerd and inventor Ben Solo, who barely leaves the house except to go to galactic conventions, must team up with former space pirate Rey to defeat Palpatine before a fleet of planet-obliterating Star Destroyers is unleashed. Ben can barely work his lightsaber and screams when he's out in the sun, but has an advanced capacity to stay up until the break of dawn and quote loads of useless (or is it?) trivia. He's smitten with the fiery and gorgeous Rey, and she may be just what he needs to break out of his shell.Rey can't believe her dyad in the force screams at the sight of spiders and hid behind her in their last battle, yet she can't help but be smitten by his goofy smile and giant heart. Also, when he's not cosplaying Darth Vader, he's pretty darn cute. But she's on a time crunch and can't be bothered to wait while his suppressed powers catch up to hers. Not only is the galaxy at stake, but her deepest secrets could put her future in ruins. Will Ben restore his full power in time to be the dyad partner she needs against Palpatine? Or will his fears and prickly sensitivities spell disaster? Judging by what he did to the Jedi Temple, she's really not so sure.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo
Series: The Galaxy Needs a Nerd [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1971943
Comments: 622
Kudos: 303





	1. Ben Gets Out of the House

**Author's Note:**

>   
>    
>  _Cover by @land_a_joy on Twitter, www.spiritspaintbrush.com_   
> 
> 
>   
> This is a twist on the Sequel Trilogy and borrows a lot of themes from Rise of Skywalker, except that the Solo family doesn't know anything is going on until they are notified Palpatine has returned. Why? Because why the heck not, this story wasn't meant to be taken too seriously to begin with.
> 
> This story is an adventure/comedy/dramedy, fun with the occasional serious note just to spice things up, but don't worry, our heroes will be just fine, so relax and enjoy. And yes, it will be ridiculous - Han is the grumpiest dad ever and starts off awfully mean (but will surely learn his lesson,) Ben acts like he just stepped out of The Big Bang Theory (and also learns he's more than he thinks he can be,) and Leia is ridiculously accommodating toward her sweet muffin. Seriously, just have fun and don't think too hard about it. 
> 
> There's tons of explicit language and a good dose of naughty (yet hilarious) scenes. 
> 
> PS I'm totally a nerd, so no offense is meant to any of you other nerd folk out there. While I don't have Ben's qualifications, I will totally dazzle you with my fluorescent mineral collection and spent a decade up to my armpits in computer parts for a living.
> 
> PPS I'm the one that screams out in the sun and needs hats and sunglasses, but I do like spiders and moths.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>   
>    
> 

“Ben!” Han Solo called from upstairs. “Get yer ass out of the basement for once in your life and do something useful!”

“Dad!” Ben whined, eyes focused on the beaker he was filling with a blue liquid. “I’m in the middle of an experiment!”

“And I’m in the middle of getting ready to kick your thirty-year-old ass if you don’t get up here and help me with the Falcon!”

“Damnit Dad! If I don’t add this at just the right time, it will be like the Temple all over again!”

“What did I tell you about doing that chemical shit in the house, boy?!”

He could hear his mother’s voice. “…just go, I’ll talk to him. Ben! Honey, don’t you think that’s enough now? Did you even go to bed last night?”

Ben guzzled the last of his Hyper-Fuel soda. “I’m fine, Mom.”

“Why don’t you come outside and get some daylight for once. You’re so pasty.”

Ben whined and poured the contents of the beaker into the tubing system. “There’s nothing to do out there. And I don’t want to deal with what happened last time.”

“Oh Ben, it was a moth! For the love of the Force, you’re an adult, it’s time to go out there and do adult things! Live your life! Find some actual friends, not ones you build.”

Ben looked over to his gang of droids and winked at Melanie.

“Ben, sweetheart, I’m just worried about you. Is this really the life you want? You’re so smart and you’re a sweet person, you can’t feel good about yourself couped up in the house all the time.”

Ben paused. He never felt good about himself to begin with. The world out there was just too overwhelming, people were too overwhelming, and no one was interested in his pursuits. Even Uncle Luke got tired of Ben quoting the Jedi texts verbatim, questioning everything Luke said. Ben was just trying to point out how divergent his uncle was from the sacred work of masters far better trained than Luke ever was. Why was that so wrong? Did Uncle Luke even read the books? Ben had. Six times. But no, Uncle Luke was all like, “Damnit Ben, get yer ass out of your room and train for once! What, are you allergic to sunlight? You can’t read all the time!”

Ben showed him! Showed them all! He totally _could_ read all the time!

His mother sighed at the top of the stairs. Ben hated being such a disappointment to his parents on every level possible. They just didn’t get him. No one really did.

He gave the usual answer. “I’m just working. Do I not contribute to this house?”

Leia sighed. “Of course you do.”

“Well tell Dad that!”

“He just…he doesn’t understand what you do, just…finish up and go see him, huh? Before he sends Uncle Chewie down there.”

Ben scrambled to the foot of the stairs. “No! No Mom! Please, don’t let that happen again! He destroyed my entire crystal growing experiment the last time. And remember? The hole in the floor? I told him if he knocked over my chemistry kit that would happen, but nooooo.”

Leia groaned, so frustrated. He hated seeing that look on his mother’s face, knowing that he caused it. Disappointment, frustration, defeat, those were the only emotions he could raise in others. She put her hand up. “Just finish up and join the world of the living for once, huh?”

Ben pursed his lips, ran his hand through his shoulder-length black hair, and backed up. “Fine. Whatever. But I need to finish this.”

His mother sighed and signaled the door to close. Ben hung his head. He enjoyed being alone. It was so much easier to get things done that way. What he hated was feeling lonely, when an entire galaxy just didn’t get you.

He returned to the experiment. The gray clay that finally solidified looked like soft lead. He used a pair of tweezers to pick off a tiny piece and brought it over to the testing chamber. About six feet wide, he had pre-loaded it with the _Stamor_ worms, highly dangerous with rows of grinding teeth when fully grown, which is why he kept them in hibernation freeze. But for this experiment, they had to be alive and squirming. By the stars did he hate them, so gross, but necessary for this experiment.

He flicked the piece of clay into the center of the chamber and slammed the lid closed. The force of impact caused a chemical reaction that made the tiny blob spread out in all directions as a blue foam. It puffed to the sides of the glass enclosure, then slowly melted. Once it was a simple, inert liquid at the bottom of the chamber, he opened the lid. The worms were frozen. With a stick, he poked one of them. It disintegrated.

“YES!” he screamed and danced around the room. He grabbed Melanie’s gentle metal hands and jumped up and down. “It worked! It worked!”

Her sultry voice responded, “That’s so wonderful, Dr. Ben Solo. I am so proud of you.”

People usually ignored his multiple PhDs and just called him mister, but he had programmed her to say that, programmed her to say a lot of things just for him. He grabbed her soft silicone over metal face in his hands and softened. “You have always been by me through it all.” Just as he was about to kiss her, the door flung open.

“Ben!” Han said. “Get yer ass up here!”

Ben clenched his teeth. “DAD! I said I’d be up when I was done!”

“Well someone’s at the door looking for you.”

Ben licked his lips. “Is it the Chief General of Science for the Galactic Senate? Because they owe me for—”

“Ass up here now!”

Uh oh. This sounded serious. He scrambled up the stairs, ducked under the doorway, and followed the voices to the living room.

Two men and a little BB unit stood off to the side, but that’s not what stopped Ben’s heart. She was a beauty like he had never seen, the type he wished would come out of one of his video games and pull him in to join her on her quest. He swore her flowing brown hair was wafting in the wind, but since they were indoors that was scientifically impossible, so it must have been his imagination or the effects of too much Hyper-Fuel. She wore form-fitting white accented with shoulder armor and gear belts on her hips and thighs bearing three pistols and…was that a lightsaber?

“Ben Solo?” she asked. She sounded tough and space-wise, like she’d been journeying kicking ass for years. She had a confidence and a fierce edge that stirred just about everything in his body and soul.

He tried to speak, but his mouth didn’t work. “Buh?”

Han growled. “He’s Ben alright.”

She stepped forward, hand out, and his body turned into a block of ice. “I’m Rey, and I need you.”

Hearing that come from an actual woman’s mouth nearly made him finish something he didn’t even start. Somehow his hand lifted on its own, and when she shook it, he let out a high-pitched cry.

Han snarled. “Fucking hell, are you even my son?”

Once the initial shock of her soft skin wore off, he felt something else rise within him, something he didn’t understand. There was recognition, as if he should have known this person his entire life.

Her eyes lit up. “It _is_ you!”

Ben tried to make his lips work. “Muh?”

Rey dropped his hand and turned to stand with the other two men. “There’s a lot we need to discuss. This is Poe Dameron, a fighter pilot for the Resistance, and Finn, who’s Force-sensitive like me. I just want to say first, General Organa, General Solo, it is an honor to meet such fine war heroes, and I do hate having to bring this news to your door after so many years of peace that you helped bring about to the galaxy.”

Leia took on the tough edge Ben had rarely seen. “What’s happening?”

Rey straightened. “Palpatine has returned.”

Ben watched his parents straighten and narrow their focus. “How is this possible?” Leia asked.

Rey shook her head. “There’s a Sith cult that used cloning methods to bring him back—”

“Cloning?” Ben finally found the ability to speak. “Like live-body, perfect replica cloning?”

“Yes, apparently the Sith have methods for such unnatural creations—”

“Oh wow! I mean, the subject has been broached many times, but due to Senate rule it was deemed an abhorrence to sentient life and abandoned, but if you’re saying—can I see the lab? Do you have any documentation? Reports? Tissue samples?”

Everyone stared at him.

Poe blinked. “Tissue samples?”

Ben nodded emphatically. “Oh yes! I don’t need much, just a scraping of cells, I have a DNA sequencing system—built it myself—and I’d love to—”

“Shut up, boy!” Han growled.

Rey looked up at him in annoyance, and Ben felt ridiculous yet again in the presence of a woman. He dipped his head down, turning away from her lovely hazel eyes. “Ben, this situation is dangerous and I need you take it seriously. Not only has Palpatine returned, but he has been amassing a fleet of Star Destroyers, each with planet destroying capabilities. If he finally gets them online and deploys them, there’s nothing we have that can take down that fleet in time before utter devastation follows. Ben, I need your help.”

Ben squirmed and tried not to blush. No pretty girl ever asked for his help. No girl ever looked at him. “Did…did you get wind of my experiments? Is there something I made that you can use to fight him?”

She stepped even closer, and every pore on his body exploded with sweat. He hoped she couldn’t see that he was shaking.

She looked up at him, so close he could feel the heat from her body even through his long, black shirt. “No Ben. I need you. Just you.”

Her hand cupped his cheek, and everything turned fuzzy and soft before going dark.

#

Rey stared down at the tall man sprawled on the living room couch. Of all the people in the galaxy, how was he bound to her? The guy was a mess!

“I’m so sorry for this.” Leia fanned Ben. “He’s…not used to…he’s…”

“A damn nerd,” Han said. “I had to get a test to make sure he was my kid.”

“Han, you didn’t!”

“Yeah, I did! As he got older? The way he is? How can he be my kid?” Han waved his hand toward the couch. “Look at him, giant man-baby fainting at the touch of a pretty girl.” He pointed at Leia. “This is your fault for babying him! Damn mama’s boy—”

“Shut up! And leave him alone. He’s…not you, okay? But have you ever looked at what he _has_ done? Do you even recognize all the accomplishments he’s had? The things he’s created? How many awards he’s gotten?”

“He has the blood of heroes and this is what he does with it?”

Leia stood. “He also has the blood of darkness but he resisted. When have you ever complimented him for that?”

“Then it’s true,” Rey said, pacing. “He is a descendant of Darth Vader.”

Han scoffed. “And if he were alive and looked at what his bloodline had become, Vader would have cut off Ben’s arm too.”

Leia smacked him in the arm. “Stop it! That’s not funny!”

Rey nodded. “Darkness rises, and Light to meet it. Only I don’t know who’s who anymore.” Ben moaned and turned his head, thick, black waves of hair spilling across his forehead. His eyes finally fluttered open. They were lovely, dark in the center, lighter on the edges, and so beautifully expressive and deep. When they alighted on her, he jumped and scrambled to the farthest corner of the couch away from her.

This shipwreck was going to be her key to defeating Palpatine?

“Honey,” Leia said, “you okay?”

Ben nodded, eyes still regarding Rey with a mix of terror and infatuation.

Rey really didn’t have time for this. “Ben listen to me. Time is of the essence. We have to defeat Palpatine before he can ready that fleet. I hate to even make this request of your family, but Leia, Han? We need you more than ever.”

Poe nodded. “The Senate is refusing to acknowledge that this threat is real, but we have proof. You guys took down the empire and two Death Stars with just a ragtag group of rebels. If ever the Resistance needed your guidance and expertise, it’s now.”

Leia stood. “I was afraid it would come to this. I was voting to investigate, constantly getting overruled. I’ll do whatever I can to help.”

“I’m in,” Han said. “Whatever you need, me and Chewie will be there.” Han pointed to Ben. “What about _that_? What do you need from him? A fleet of sexbots?”

Ben gasped and sat up. “Melanie’s not a sexbot! I told you that!”

Finn snorted. “You have a sexbot named Melanie?”

“She’s not a sexbot! I swear!” His eyes met Rey’s, and he looked like he might faint again.

Rey grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer. “Ben!” He froze but didn’t faint. “I need you to listen and keep control of your head. I need you, you specifically, to join me in defeating Palpatine. You and I are a dyad in the Force. That’s—”

“Two as one in the Force.” His eyes brightened, excited even. At least he stopped panicking. Rey let him go. “Yes, I know of it. I read that book seven times. One soul, one instance in the Force, two bodies. Polar opposites, coming together as one, perfect balance.” He swallowed. “A force so strong it couldn’t be hosted in one body, hence the two. The most…powerful partnership, as powerful as life itself, able to overcome death. Fun fact, there are instances of the Sith trying to force a dyad connection, with varying results, I can quote a few, but a true dyad in the Force is so powerful as to obliterate even a horde of…of darkness…” He swallowed again. “It can’t be me.”

“Yeah, I thought the same thing. But I saw you in visions, and everything has confirmed it.”

He smiled lightly, mirthless. “I’m…not that powerful. I can’t be the one you’re looking for.”

Rey reached for his face. “If I could just reach into you, perhaps you would see, perhaps you could feel it. Will you let me?”

Ben’s huge eyes watched her hands grow closer. He inched back, trembling. Shaking her head, she gave a quick overview of his entire, giant being—oh great, his pants were already sticking out at an odd angle, and she hadn’t even touched him beyond a handshake.

He was a disaster! Maybe she should just show him the night of his life and get it all out of his system, calm him down a little. Maybe then he’d be of some use.

“Rey,” Leia said, taking her arm, “can I speak to you in the kitchen?” Rey frowned but followed. Once behind a closed door, Leia sat. “Rey…we’ve suppressed his powers.”

Rey flinched. “What? Does he know?”

Leia sighed. “Yes and no. We told him as he trained and grew stronger, his powers would too. What we really meant was that he would unlock more the better able he was in handling it. I mean look at him, you see how he is. When he was a little boy, his powers were strong, way too strong, and he started talking about evil voices telling him to do bad things. My brother Luke felt an outside dark influence, and with Vader’s bloodline…” Leia sighed. “We were scared. We didn’t want to lose him to the Dark Side. Luke found a way, in the old Jedi texts, to suppress his powers to just a trickle of what it should be. That kept the voices quiet, they had no open access anymore, and what did seep in was so small that it came out in…stupid character nonsense instead of real danger, you’ll see what I mean soon enough. When he was old enough to train with his uncle at the Jedi Temple, we hoped that little by little he could unleash his potential, but…”

“But what?”

Leia smiled. “Ben wasn’t suited to the temple. That’s a whole other story for another time. So, we brought him home, kept him suppressed, and just let him be…him.”

Rey sighed and fluffed her wild hair. “Great, he has no idea what you’ve done, and I need him at full power. This is just terrific.”

“It was the only way to protect him.”

Rey tossed her hair over her shoulder. “Yeah yeah, I get it. Well, he will need to come with me. I can’t guarantee I can protect him, but maybe I can get him up to speed so he can protect himself.”

Leia laughed until she almost fell out of her chair.

“What’s so funny?”

“Protect himself?!” She laughed even harder. “Oh Rey, you have no idea what you just stepped in.”

Considering he fainted when she touched his cheek, she had at least some inkling.

#

Rey strode back into the living room. Ben was off the couch, skulking in the corner and avoiding her gaze. What was she going to do with him? She sighed and crossed her arms. “Here’s the deal. Ben and I need to get to Exegol to face off against Palpatine. Hopefully I can get Ben out of his shell by then.”

Han snorted. “That’ll be the day. Well whatever you need, me and Chewie will be glad to help. I don’t know how to get to Exegol, but we’ll take you in the Falcon.”

“Leia,” Poe said, “would you be willing to come to the Resistance base to help us out? We really need someone who’s been on the front lines.”

“Absolutely,” Leia said, “whatever you need.”

“Wait!” Ben emerged from the shadows. “Mom, you’re not coming with us?”

Leia sighed and smiled. “I’m needed elsewhere, muffin.”

“Muffin,” Poe snickered along with Finn.

“See what I mean?” Han said.

“Mooooom!” Ben said like the world was ending. “What if my allergies get triggered?”

Leia rolled her eyes. “Then bring your meds!”

“But I don’t know how to take them—”

“Read the bottle!”

“B-but who’s going to make dinner like I like it? You know I can’t eat weird food! You know how my stomach is. And what about sunscreen? You know I can’t go out in the sun like everyone else, how am I supposed to put that on—”

“Oh for the love of the Force, Ben! You look in a mirror and rub it in, it’s not hard!”

Han huffed. “Like you ever go out in the sun to begin with, damn vampire.”

Ben pursed his lips. “I’m not a vampire! I just think better at night when you’re not bugging me!” He turned back to Leia. “Moooom—”

“Knock it off!” Rey said, making him jump out of his skin. “The damn galaxy is at stake. Billions will die, and you’re worried about sunscreen and weird food?”

Ben stared at her, hands tight at his chest. “I get queasy if stuff tastes off—”

Rey roared and stomped around the living room. “Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me?! THIS is who I’m stuck with? THIS?!” She looked back at him, ready to ream him from here to Jakku, but damn, the look in his eyes. Huge, hurt puppy-dog eyes stared back at her before he turned and hung his head. Her stomach turned. Oh hell, did she actually feel _bad_ for saying that? She’d said worse to many in her time. She called Finn a worthless shit heap the other day and Poe a chronic masturbator. They survived just fine. Now here was ultra-sad Ben, and she felt like she wanted to hug him.

Rey rubbed her scalp and drew a lock of her hair to her lips. The smoothness was a soothing balm to all these irritations. With a growl followed by a sigh, she put her hand out. “Look, I’m sorry, Ben. You’re just not what I expected.”

He didn’t look at her. “I never am,” he muttered.

Now she felt even worse. “Fuck’s sake, look, we don’t have time for this. Han, we’ve got C3P0 with us, and he knows the location of Palpatine’s old Wayfinder, only we can’t get it out of him, some stupid shit about his programming not allowing him to translate Sith. Once we get that figured out, we’ll have the location for you.”

Ben perked up. “You need something out of a droid? I can help you.”

Finn shook his head. “We were told it would completely wipe his memory to access the data. We didn’t have the heart to do that to him.”

Ben grinned. “What idiot told you that? Bring him downstairs, I’ll get what you need.” He rushed off toward the kitchen.

Finn shrugged and looked to Rey. She waved him onward. Whatever would make this go fastest is what needed to be done. Maybe this Ben wouldn’t be such a disaster after all.

Han nodded. “Me and Chewie will get the Falcon ready. Who’s coming with us?”

“Finn stays with me,” Rey said. “We need someone else with the Force on our team. Poe will take Leia to the Resistance base.”

Han huffed. “Girl who likes to take charge. Reminds me a little of someone.” He winked at Leia.

Leia gave him a sour grin that softened. “Let me pack and let the droids know we’ll be gone a while.”

Rey turned to Poe. “Transfer mine and Finn’s equipment and supplies to the Falcon. I want to go down and make sure Ben knows what he’s doing. I won’t have him ruining C3P0.”

Poe saluted her with a smile. “Yes ma’am.”

Han stopped Poe on the way out. “You always follow her commands?”

Poe grinned. “Course I do. I’m smart.” He patted Han on the arm. “Have fun.”

Rey let the little comments slide behind her as she followed Ben.

#

Ben scrambled to ready his equipment, excited to show off his expertise, maybe impress someone for once. Maybe impress _her_.

She was so pretty. So…so pretty. And hot. And sexy. Mean though, really mean. Kind of scary.

And she was expecting way too much out of him if she thought he could help her with the whole Force/dyad/Palpatine thing. His Force capabilities were so weak, it was pointless to get that out of him. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t help in other ways. He did a quick mental inventory of what he’d need to bring on the trip and wondered how many crates his father’s ship could hold.

Once the droid equipment was ready, he turned to his chemistry set and screamed. Rey was standing at the bottom of the stairs. He didn’t even hear her come in.

Rey crossed her arms. “You always scream when someone enters your inner sanctum?”

Ben tried to moisten his lips, but his entire mouth ran dry. “No one ever comes down here.”

She strolled about the room, looking so cool and calm, like she owned the place. “Place looks like a lab.”

Ben nodded. “I like experiments.” He felt stupid even as he said it. How was he going to share Dad’s ship with this girl who turned him into jelly with just her presence alone?

“I can tell. So what is it that you do? Professionally.”

Ben gripped the table behind him as he watched the walking goddess eye his room. “I invent stuff. Electronics, droids, chemical compounds—I just had a successful test on what’s basically a freeze bomb—oh man, does that make me sound creepy?”

Rey shrugged. “Considering I kill for a living, not really.” She ran her fingers over his telescope. “War is war.”

Ben nodded. His parents were war heroes, and he really knew nothing about such things except what he read. She drew entirely too close as she examined his chemistry set, making his entire body grow rigid.

Rey nodded. “Looks like you’re quite intelligent. Could be useful.”

He couldn’t help but just gawk at her. “You wanna see my mineral collection?”

She looked at him as if wondering why he’d ask such a stupid question. “What is that?”

“Um, rocks and crystal formations. C-come here, I’ll show you.” He skirted over to the display cabinet in the corner, glad to be away from her heat and scent before it drove him into utter madness, or at least sent him into the shower for a while. He flicked a switch, lighting up the various crystals on stone matrixes, sparkling in every color imaginable. “That teal blue one is my prize there, isn’t the color fantastic?”

Rey leaned forward, her hands behind her back. “Hm, pretty. Worth anything?”

“Oh, well, yeah, to other collectors.” He smiled. “The local pawn shop isn’t going to care much for stavoranite, but I know a guy who will pay top dollar for it. Oh, wait, look at this.” He turned off one switch and hit another. The case lit up in violet-blue, and he watched as her eyes grew wide. Most of his collection glowed in intense greens, yellows, oranges, reds, and blues. “I like fluorescent minerals.”

She smiled in wonder. “I’ve never seen anything like this. It’s incredible.”

He chuckled, happy to share this with someone who actually appreciated it. “I’m glad you like it. Here.” He opened the cabinet, pulled out a small crystal that screamed with bright green, and held it out for her. “Take it. It’s yours.”

Rey looked up at him. “I can’t take this from you. This collection, it clearly means a lot to you.”

“Yeah, but…” _So do you_. That’s what he wanted to say, but he’d never be able to spit that out. “It’s fine, I have plenty of that one. I know it doesn’t look like much when it’s not in the case. You can’t see the glow unless you are under shortwave UV light, but you know, not everything is how it appears on the surface. Sometimes there’s a bright light inside we can’t see except in the right circumstances.”

The look on Rey’s face made his heart pound in his chest. He wasn’t sure what it meant, but it touched his soul. A clattering on the stairs snapped them out of their mutual gaze.

“I say,” C3P0 said in Finn’s arms, “what manner of repair facility is this?”

Ben jogged over. “Hey C3P0, remember me? Ben Solo?”

The brassy face turned his way. “My, master Solo, you have grown so much since I last saw you.”

Finn set the droid down. “Are you absolutely sure you can do this without wiping his memory?”

Ben scoffed as if they had asked him to calculate one plus one. “Please. Besides, I always run a backup before touching data. Melanie, come here.”

Finn blinked as the nearly humanoid robot strolled toward Ben. “Ohhhh wow, that’s Melanie, huh?”

Rey looked the droid up and down, eyes wide. “Impressive. She could—”

“Almost pass for human?” Ben said. “Yeah, I know.” Finn coughed, but it sounded more like a laugh. “Damnit, she’s not a sexbot!”

C3P0 jolted. “Oh my! Miss Melanie, what exactly is your programming and function?”

“She’s my assistant.” Ben pried open the back panel on C3P0’s head. “Melanie, format data bank twelve with the A423 file system.” He connected a cable from Melanie to C3P0.

“Formatting complete, Dr. Solo,” Melanie said.

Rey quirked an eyebrow. “Doctor?”

Ben glanced at her, his ears and cheeks reddening. “I have a PhD in physics and chemistry, also majored in electronic engineering and computer science. Melanie, screen.” The droid projected a display. Ben swiped at the images. “Alright C3P0, just relax while we run the backup.” As he waited, he returned to dismantling the chemistry set while watching Finn and Rey. They eyed his equipment and collections with varying degrees of wonder and bafflement. As usual, he felt the sting of perpetual judgment gnawing at him.

“Backup complete, Dr. Solo, verification successful.”

Ben placed the equipment into a crate, sprayed the interior with packing foam, and closed the box before returning to the droids. He tapped at the projected screen. “Okay C3P0, I’m going to hack through the encryption layer. You shouldn’t feel a thing but it may feel weird to have that information suddenly flood your RAM banks.”

Finn nodded to Rey. “Guy knows his stuff. Should have come here first.”

Rey shrugged. “Who knew?”

_Of course, who knows Ben Solo and his scientific achievements. Everyone wants to talk about war and battleships and lightsabers, no one ever wants to hear about the advancements I’ve brought to the galaxy. As usual, I’m invisible._ Ben swallowed and tapped furiously at the projected keyboard. “Melanie, prepare a data card for the transmission. Come on key-gen, you can do it…I’m in! Downloading transmission.”

Rey jogged over. “C3P0, how are you doing?”

“Why just fine, Miss Rey, though it does feel uncomfortable to access Sith data for the first time.”

She smiled. “You’re doing great. Just hang in there.”

Ben couldn’t help but watch her, mesmerized. Her smile was so genuine, so pretty. He imagined she didn’t show it much to others. Maybe something about C3P0 was special enough to earn that expression. Maybe Ben would be so lucky one day.

Melanie said, “Transfer complete, Dr. Solo.” She popped out the data card.

Ben snatched it and snapped it into his data-bracelet on his left arm. “Thank you Melanie.”

“No, thank _you_ for the opportunity to serve you, my sexy beast.”

Ben froze and forced himself to look at the other two humans in the room. Rey stared at him in exasperation. Finn had his hand over his mouth making some sort of crackling noise. Ben sighed and disconnected C3P0. “Just laugh and get it over with. Everyone else does.”

“Thank you!” Finn said and doubled over.

Rey just rolled her eyes. “Great. Perfect. Now that that’s done, let’s get on the Falcon and get out of here.”

#

“Can someone please help me?!”

Rey watched Ben struggle with another crate, huffing as he dragged it across the ground.

Han growled. “How many damn crates do you need? We’re not moving!”

“I need my stuff! Uncle Chewy?” Ben received a furious howling in response. “Please?”

Chewbacca roared and yanked the crate out of Ben’s arms, hauling it with a lot more ease. Ben ran back into the house and came out with two huge cases under his arms. The clouds parted, and Rey heard a horrible screeching. Ben dropped his cases to shield his eyes.

Finn frowned. “He’s not really a vampire, is he?”

Han shook his head. “I don’t know what the hell he is.”

“I need my hat!” Ben cried. “Where’s my hat and sunglasses? MOM?!”

“She left already! Probably to get away from your whining.”

“I’m not whining! I can’t seeeee!”

Rey had enough of this walking disaster. She grasped his shirt and yanked him back under the patio overhang. He lifted his hands from his face and blinked, squinting. When he caught her furious face, he jumped back, hands curled to his chest.

“Get your stupid hat and sunglasses!” she spat with clenched teeth. “I’ll take your cases!” She stormed over, lifted the cases with ease, and stomped up the ramp into the Falcon.

Han shook his head. “You’re gonna let a girl half your size show you up?”

Ben balled his fists. “Shut up, Dad!”

Rey slammed his cases down in the cargo hold and returned only to find more stupidity. Han and Ben were arguing, Ben with his telescope under his arms.

“Dad! I need it!”

“What the hell do you need that for in space? We’re going to the damn planets! You don’t need a friggin telescope!”

Finn joined her. “So, the fate of the galaxy rests with you and…that.”

Rey clenched her teeth. “Don’t remind me.” She stomped down and looked up at the giant goof. “Put it back!”

Ben’s eyes widened. “But—”

“NOW!”

He scrambled back inside like a scolded puppy. Han put his hand behind his head. “You sure about him? Being some sort of special Force thing you need?”

Rey sighed. “Unfortunately.”

“Look, I apologize for him. I…I don’t know what happened. Think his mother just babied him too much, but…I just don’t know about him. I don’t know that he can be what you need. I don’t want you to feel like you’ve wasted your time with him.”

“Maybe once his full power is unleashed, he will be what he’s meant to be. Did you ever think of that? Perhaps you stunted him by stunting his powers?”

Han put his hands on his hips. “Oh and aren’t we holier-than-thou all of a sudden? And what was the alternative? Have him slaughter billions like his grandfather? You don’t know what he was like when he was young. You don’t know what he could do, what was in his head, what Leia and Luke saw in visions of his future. We did what we could to keep him from destroying everything around him. Don’t you dare judge us for that!”

“Then don’t judge him for being what’s left.” She could have walked away after that comment, but that wasn’t her way. She just stared at him, waiting for his response.

Han opened his mouth a few times, then wiped a hand over it. “You got a lot of nerve, little lady.”

“Oh I’ve got all the nerve, and you better get used to it. I don’t change for anyone.”

Fury in Han’s eyes softened. He chuckled. “I like you, kid. You’ve got more gumption than I’ve seen in anyone. Gonna eat my kid alive.”

“Considering it.”

Ben finally returned wearing a black, wide-brimmed hat and sunglasses. Along with that long-sleeved black shirt, he could pass for mysterious and magical, a shadowy wraith bent on destruction. But his demeanor just made him look like a shivering basket case.

Rey sighed. “All this to walk across the yard to your ship?”

Ben shrugged, shrinking into himself. “The sun hurts my eyes. I’m very sensitive.”

“No shit. Did you pack your lightsaber?”

Ben quirked his head. “I don’t have a lightsaber.”

Fury burned through Rey’s veins. “What do you MEAN you don’t have a lightsaber? I thought you trained as a Jedi!”

Ben shifted and scratched underneath his hat. “I did, but…”

“But WHAT?!”

Han groaned. “His uncle refused to let him take his lightsaber when he left. Said he didn’t earn it.”

Ben clenched his hands. “I did too earn it! He’s just an asshole! Fuck him—he can keep the damn lightsaber! I don’t need it!”

Rey put her hands on her hips. “Yeah, you do. I don’t have a spare and Finn needs his.” She sighed, tapped her foot. “We stop at the Jedi temple first, get your lightsaber.”

“He won’t give it to me. He’s a jerk! And I don’t want to see him!”

“Oh why the hell not?”

“Because he tried to kill me!”

Rey flinched. “What? Why would he—the legendary Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master, try to kill you? Is this a joke?”

“It’s not a joke! He came after me with his lightsaber.”

Rey crossed her arms, genuinely curious. “And what did you do?”

“What do you think I did? I ran for my life! I couldn’t defeat him if I tried, and he was out for blood! He was really gonna do it.”

Han growled, which he seemed to do a lot. “Tell her _why_ Luke came after you.”

Ben thrust his arms out. “Why does that matter, Dad?! I’m your son, you’re supposed to be on my side!”

“Well if you weren’t doing something so stupid, I would have been!”

Rey wanted to rip her hair out. She did nothing but hear these two argue constantly. “What HAPPENED?!”

Ben crossed his arms. “It was all Uncle Luke’s fault.”

Han shook his head. “Of course it was…”

“I’m serious! I told him never to barge into my room unannounced. I told him how easily I get startled. I told him all these things and still, STILL he flings the door open and screams my name and…”

Rey leaned forward. “And what?”

Ben sighed. “I sucked at being a Jedi, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I was terrible at it! I couldn’t fight for shit, use my powers for shit, and even though I memorized all the Jedi texts, that didn’t mean a thing to Uncle Luke. He was just mad that I knew more than him. I mean, is it so wrong to correct him in class? He misquoted the texts! And he was doing it wrong! The texts clearly state—it’s like he didn’t even read all of them! Well I did, multiple times, and therefore I had a right to correct him. He would just get so mad all the time at that. He was jealous of my knowledge! Jealous of my power to remember better than he did!”

“That hardly seems like a reason to kill you.”

Han said, “Oh I’ll fill you in on that one, seeing as he’s avoiding what he did WRONG.” Ben huffed and turned away. “Genius over here brings his chemistry set, decides it’s a great idea to test out new substances in a huge building full of multiple rooms and dorms.”

“Shut up!” Ben said.

“Well Luke barges into his room to ask why he’s not meditating or some shit like he should be, and Jumpy McScaredy Pants over here gets startled and knocks over the chemistry set. He’s only lucky they evacuated the building as the concoction spread, started eating through walls before the damn room collapsed onto the set and blew the damn building up. Genius here blew up the Jedi temple fucking around with his nerd shit. I’d probably have come after him with a lightsaber too.”

Rey sighed and put a hand to her head before looking at Ben. “Really?!”

Ben hid beneath the brim of his hat and turned away. “I was young. I know what I’m doing now. It never happened again—and it was his fault for scaring me!”

Han pointed. “If not for the fact that most of the school was outside meditating, you could have killed someone, you idiot!”

“You always take his side!”

Rey let out a roar of frustration. “Enough already! Are you two going to be like this the whole trip?”

“Of course,” Han said.

Ben nodded. “We’re always like this.”

Rey smiled and put a hand on their shoulders. “Well congratulations. Today is the first day of your new adventure, a new start.” She gritted her teeth. “And I don’t want to hear this crap the entire time!” She spun away from them, heading toward the ship. “Figure out how to get along. The galaxy is at stake. We’re going to see Luke and get your lightsaber, end of story.”

She heard some muttering behind her, then Han said, “You couldn’t handle a girl like that if you tried.”

“Shut up, Dad!”


	2. The Cosplay Catastrophe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Ben, was it really a good idea to surprise your father with your Darth Vader costume? And the nonsense just keeps on rolling in as Rey tries to figure out her new crew, especially the anxious goof who looks entirely too pleasant in a cape.
> 
>   
>    
> 

Rey strolled the ship to get a feel for it while the others got settled. Han and Chewbacca were off in the cockpit, Finn busied himself unloading their gear into the storage lockers, and Ben flitted about with arms full of items she did not recognize.

“Hey!” Ben called from somewhere. “No one open the airlock without checking with me first. I have an experiment going on in there.”

“Course you do,” came the gruff response from the cockpit.

Rey shook her head. This wasn’t at all the type of ship she was used to. She stretched out on the couch in the lounge and observed, trying to understand this new crew, especially her dyad in the Force. He could not have been her polar opposite more if he tried, and she supposed that made sense. Two opposites coming together.

Made a lot more sense than the other plan, and she shook her head at that debacle. Palpatine wasn’t nearly as smart as he liked to think himself.

Ben swept back into the room with footsteps behind him. “Melanie, get the hyperbaric unit into storage area B, and then—”

“Argh!” Han growled from the cockpit. “You brought your damn sexbot on the trip?”

Ben leaned toward the corridor with his teeth bared. “For the last time, she is not a sexbot! She is my assistant and I need her with me at all times!”

Han appeared in the corridor’s entry. “Sure you do. And you wonder why you’re a thirty-year-old virgin.”

Ben turned to Han in horror. “What—no—why would you—that’s not true!” He spun, saw Rey sitting there, spun back to Han, and looked like he might actually explode into a million pieces.

“The hell it ain’t. When were you ever with a woman? You even kissed a woman?”

“What—of course I have!”

“One that was born, not one you made.”

“What—I—you—I don’t have to tell you everything that goes on in my life!”

“Because nothing ever goes ON in your life! Tell me you at least touched someone warm. Hell, I don’t even care if it’s a guy. I don’t even care if it’s human, as long as it breathes!”

Ben spun toward Rey again, and she could see how crimson his face was turning. He thrust his hand into his hair, then pointed at Han. “That is none of your business! None of that—none of this—shut up!” He grabbed the droid’s hand. “Come on, Melanie. We have work to do.” He stormed out of the lounge, dragging his droid behind him.

Rey stretched out on the couch and watched as Han elbowed Chewbacca, chuckling. She folded her hands. “Proud of yourself?”

Han turned to her. “Excuse me—hey, boots off the upholstery!”

Rey didn’t move. She just glared.

Han pointed to her feet. “Boots! Now!”

She still didn’t move. “You didn’t answer my question.”

“You can get your feet off the couch or Chewbacca here can do it for you.”

His friend turned with a short noise as if to ask, “Really?”

Rey shrugged. “He’s welcome to try.” She grinned.

Han pointed. “Do it.” He received a roar from his friend. “Oh look who turned soft all of a sudden—”

Rey put her hands behind her head. “How about I take my feet off when you explain to me why you have to humiliate your son?”

“Hey, I don’t have to explain my family dynamics to you or anyone. You’ve known him half a day. Try living with him. You’ll get it. Just wait. Wait until he irritates you into losing your frigging mind, then come talk to me about how I treat him.”

Rey sighed. “I guess you’re just lucky you stunted his powers. Where I come from, this sort of confrontation would end in a _way_ different manner, I assure you.” She stood and stepped toward the two men, stopping at Han. “My boots are off the couch.” She remained there, staring him down until she felt satisfied, then continued along the ship to find Ben.

Behind her, she heard Chewbacca say something, then Han responding. “Yeah right, just wait. By tomorrow she’ll be throwing him out the airlock with his experiment.”

#

She followed Ben’s deep voice into the cargo hold area. A black shirt flew and crumpled on the ground. Melanie strode over to pick it up.

“Sick and tired of his shit,” Ben muttered from behind a stack of crates. Rey rounded the edge as he pulled a tank top down over his abdomen. “Just wait, wait until I finally get the recognition I deserve for my discoveries, then he’ll—GAH!” He leapt up at the sight of her and flattened against the wall.

Hm, that body was not what she expected. Still pale as death, but surprisingly muscular for someone who proudly spent his time staring at rocks. “You startle easily.”

Ben sucked in his lips, made some sort of noise and nodded.

“Work on that. We’re going to war. You need to toughen up a little.”

Ben nodded even stronger this time and stuck his thumb up.

Rey cocked her head toward the doorway. “Forget what your father said in there. There’s no shame in not being in a relationship. They’re a pain in the ass, anyway.”

His thick lips slipped out from between his teeth. Midnight eyes regarded her with such soft sweetness she felt her heart flutter for the first time. Ebony hair framed his face in the dimly lit hold. “I’m…I’m not…”

Rey put her hand up. “I don’t care, really I don’t. There are bigger things going on in the galaxy than whether or not you’ve dated anyone. Don’t worry that I look down on you for it. I don’t. It’s not my business. Not anyone’s business, just like you said.”

He nodded, quirked a brief smile.

Since he looked like a cornered animal trying to flee, she gave him some space by strolling about the hold. “I have to say, judging by your arms and chest, you’re surprisingly fit. I had expected you to be softer.”

“Oh! Well, I do work out, actually.” At least he was talking. “I got a Holo-dancer system.”

Rey frowned. “What the hell is that?”

He brightened. “Oh, let me show you.” He dug into a crate and pulled out some equipment that looked familiar. “Let me just put this here, and set this, and it even comes with resistance cuffs to tone your arms, let me put those on—”

Finn slid into the room. “Did someone say Holo-dancer?”

Ben’s head perked up. “You heard of it?”

“Hell yes! We have a system at the Resistance base.”

Rey groaned. “Oh, that stupid thing?”

“You got another set of cuffs?”

Ben nodded. “Yeah, here. Rey, you want to try?”

She shook her head. “No. Really don’t.”

Finn waved her off. “She’s not a fan. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

Ben shrugged and tossed Finn the cuffs. “That’s okay. I don’t like anything my parents want me to get into, I get it.” He pressed a button, waited for the projected screen, and tapped a few times. The cargo bay lit with a projected holographic dance floor, giant screen before the two men.

Ben tapped one more time, then stood on the left set of squares while Finn positioned on the right. The music started, and the guys leapt and tapped to the coordinated flashes on the screen, arms out swinging, bodies spinning, bending, jumping. Honestly, she expected Ben to be as much a walking disaster as he had been so far, but he was quite good at this.

“Oh hell no!” Finn said. “No one’s beating my high score!”

Ben grinned. “Challenge accepted!”

Their legs moved faster, and Rey couldn’t help but admire how those muscles moved beneath Ben’s skin, his hair dampening from sweat, face flushed but so amused. Whatever it was about this game, he was certainly having fun with it. And he was good!

“NO!” Finn cried and stomped from the pad projection. “No one ever beat my score!”

Ben patted his back. “Come on, round two? Maybe you can take me down this time.”

Finn shook his head. “Man you move fast for such a tall fucker.”

Ben laughed. “Surprised you, huh?”

Rey put her fingers to her forehead. “Let me get this straight. You can do all that but somehow didn’t earn your lightsaber?”

Ben shrugged. “Well, this is different. It’s a game. Points. A goal to work toward.” He waved his hand in the direction of the planet they were heading toward. “Lightsaber battles, that’s just scary—oh! Here we go!”

Rey watched for a few more minutes while the giant walking panic-attack moved with more dexterity than half the warriors she’d seen in her time. It got old fast, but it planted good tidings for the future. If he could move like this, perhaps she could get him up to speed quicker than she thought.

And damn, he was a fine creature to look at, when he wasn’t staring at her wide-eyed in terror.

#

Rey continued to stroll the ship after the guys finished playing their game. Ben disappeared amidst his endless crates of who knew what, Finn was trying his hand at holo-chess with Chewbacca (and losing terribly,) and Han treated himself to a strong drink.

She wouldn’t have minded one herself but wanted to keep sharp. She hadn’t fully felt out Han and Chewbacca yet. There was more to them and she needed to understand it before she could extend her trust. No one was ever what they appeared on the surface, just like that rock Ben had given her. Only in her line of work, people weren’t usually filled with light brought out by the darkness, they looked like light while hosting a whole lot of shit underneath. 

Stomping from the corridor perked her attention, and the image jolted her. It was _him_ again.

“What do you want,” she asked before she realized it _wasn’t_ him, just a passing resemblance, but then she realized what she was looking at.

Tall and imposing in full black, long cape and ominous helmet, Darth Vader stood at the entrance to the lounge like a shroud of horror.

Han sprung from his seat, drawing his pistol while Chewbacca roared and did the same. Vader threw up his hands and dove to the ground. “Nooo!” the deep, robotic voice called. “Don’t shoot!”

Rey reached out on the Force and quirked her eyebrow. “Ben?”

He pulled off the helmet and shoved it aside, keeping his hands up. “Dad! It’s just me!”

Han roared, grabbed Ben by the cape, and hauled up him. “Damnit to all hell, Ben! What the fuck did I tell you about wearing that thing?!” Chewbacca added a cry of his own disapproval.

Ben scrambled to his feet. “I was just trying it on!”

“And you had to come out here?”

“I remembered I needed to ask you something and forgot to take it off.”

Han shoved him into the wall, the armor of the costume clunking. “I could have blown your head off, you idiot! What did I tell you about that? You know! You damn well know what we went through with that monster, and you have to go and make a costume?! He was a mass murderer and you worship him?!”

“I do not!” Ben cried, balling his fists. “This isn’t even historically accurate. _This_ is the version Day Havvens wore in the movie about him, so it’s not even the same!”

“I don’t care! He froze me in carbonite! I don’t ever want to see that outfit or mask—take that damn thing off right now! I swear to the stars I’m going to launch it into deep space where it belongs—”

Ben pointed. “Oh no you will NOT! I worked hard on this! It’s a special experimental polymer resistant to plasma weapons and it was very hard to make!”

“That man tortured your mother! Your grandfather tortured your mother, your uncle, me—the list doesn’t end!”

“I know that, and this costume is from the MOVIE VERSION! It’s not the same!”

“Take that damn thing off or I’m going to throw you into deep space with it!”

Ben growled and snatched up his helmet. “Fine! I’ll take it off! But you owe me!”

“I don’t owe you shit! You’re a grown man playing dressup. You owe ME for the near heart attack you just gave me!”

“FINE! I won’t wear it on the ship except if…”

Han put his hands on his hips. “Except if _what?_ I can’t WAIT to hear this.”

Ben thought a moment and put his hand up. “Okay, let’s just assume—and hear me out, if we get this whole Palpatine thing done in like less than four days, could we pass by Coruscant on the way back?”

Han rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Why?”

Ben put his hand up again. “I was just wondering—and I swear, I’ll do anything you want if you make this happen. I was just thinking we could pass by, you know, visit. Take in the sights. Maybe…”

“Maybe… _what?_ ”

“Dad, seriously, Galacticon will be starting soon. Biggest entertainment convention in the galaxy, and Day Havvens himself will be there, I just want him to autograph the helmet and maybe the suit too—”

Han, whacked his giant son on the arm over and over. “The galaxy is about to be destroyed and you want to go to some giant pretend thing wearing this stupid outfit?! I oughtta beat you senseless!”

“Ow! Ow! Dad, quit it!” Ben ran down the corridor, Han hot on his tail.

“Open the damn airlock!” Han cried. “I’m throwing this idiot and his stupid costume out for good!”

“No!” Ben screamed. “My experiment is in there! You’ll ruin it!”

Rey inhaled long and slow before turning to Chewbacca. “Is this normal? Is this what it’s like to live with them?”

Chewbacca nodded and gurgled before sitting back down to the game. He made one final move and won.

“Damnit!” Finn cried.

#

Rey was pretty sure Han wasn’t going to throw his son out into deep space, but regardless felt that perhaps she better check on her dyad in the Force. If Han killed him, the galaxy was doomed.

Finn jogged in behind her. “Seeing if he’s still alive?”

“Yeah, I think he really pushed the boundaries there.”

Finn chuckled. “Could you imagine Ben as part of your old crew?”

Rey snorted. “He would have lived a total of five minutes.” She shrugged. “I might have saved him though.”

“Oh _really_. This dyad thing sparking a little extra interest?”

“It’s not the dyad thing. It’s…something else. I can’t explain it. The bond between us is so weak as it is because of their stunting his powers, so it can’t be that. He’s…interesting.”

“Nothing like the others, eh?”

“Mm, definitely. But not just that. Something…something about him. I mean, he’s ridiculous, childlike, far too anxious and whiny, but he…there’s a light inside him I don’t think everyone sees. Because they don’t know how to see.” She pulled out the rock Ben had given her. “Look at this thing he gave me.”

“Mm hm. It’s a rock.”

“Yes, but when you shine ultraviolet light on it, it turns bright green like your lightsaber. It’s like it becomes bright in the darkest of light.”

“Get out, really?”

“He showed it to me in his lab, that’s why he gave me this piece, saying that what we see is not always the full truth. As if only in the darkness can you see the true light.”

A wild stomping, and Han stormed past them in the corridor, muttering about his idiot son and how the paternity test had to be wrong. As Rey neared the cargo bay, she could hear loud huffing and intermittent swearing. She held her hand up to tell Finn to wait at the entrance. She wasn’t sure what kind of condition Ben was in, and he seemed to suffer enough embarrassment on an hourly basis.

Ben shoved the lid open on a crate, muttering obscenities. He tossed the helmet in, yanked off the gauntlets, flung those in after, and only then did he stop to see she was standing nearby. He froze in place, those big onyx eyes looking a mix of scolded, terrified, and frustrated. His full lips held a soft pout while waves of his black hair hung in his face.

Damn, looking at him like that…cape billowing around his shoulders. That was sexy and reminded her entirely too much of _him_. Maybe it was the reminder, maybe it was her thrill over a man in black, or perhaps capes just made big men sexier, but that suited him in just the right way.

“You should wear a cape more often,” she said, leaning against a crate.

He cast his eyes down. “My father might actually shoot me then.”

Rey shrugged. “So he got spooked. Still an impressive outfit. Fine detailing. Almost couldn’t tell it wasn’t real. I’ve never seen Darth Vader in person, saw a few holo-vids and pics, but the work and detail alone make this look like a real suit. I’m impressed.”

His eyes widened, face turning into that sweet glow of wonder. “Really?”

Rey tilted her head. “Yeah. Actually, with the helmet off, the outfit really suits you. But I get why your dad was trigger happy.”

Ben sighed, bracing himself on the crate. “That was stupid of me to go out there like that. I wasn’t—I get absent-minded, you know? I start thinking about all these other things, formulas in my head, experiments I want to try, not realizing what I’m doing. Maybe I should apologize.”

Rey shrugged. “Up to you. Not really my thing. So, you said this is made of something that blocks plasma fire?”

Ben brightened, and a cold wash of fear flooded her body. She was sure she was about to get bombarded with information she never wanted to know. “Yes! It’s a new polymer I designed that’s exceedingly difficult to produce, but only because my lab is on Chandrila. If I could, I’d have my own ship to serve as a lab in space so I can conduct what I need without having to plan trips or bug my dad to take the Falcon out.” Ben pulled out the helmet and showed it to her. Rey couldn’t help but notice his anxiety fizzled when he talked about something familiar or that he was excited about. “See this? Touch it.”

Rey gave it a quick tap with her fingers. “Doesn’t feel like much. Lightweight. Honestly, feels like I could fling it at the ground and crack it in one shot.”

Ben grinned, backed up into the middle of the cargo hold, and slammed the helmet on the ground. She jumped at the loud sound along with the utter shock that he’d try to damage something so intricate he worked hard on. He jogged back over and held it out. “Look. Not a dent, not a scratch, nothing.”

Rey nodded. “Impressive.”

He put his hands out to tell her to wait, ran the helmet into the middle of the bay again. He hauled a metal crate to the center, tipped it over, slid the helmet inside, and returned to her. “Shoot it.”

Rey gave him a look of disbelief and shook her head. “I don’t want to ruin something you worked so hard on. My equipment is strong.”

He tilted his head over to it. “Nah, go ahead. Trust me.”

She shrugged. If he started crying over his destroyed helmet, that was his problem. She drew her weapon, spun the wheel to reduce the caliber of the shot, and fired. The red blast careened off the helmet into the crate, leaving a sizzling hole.

Ben snatched the helmet and returned it, showing to to her again. “Nothing. No searing, scratch, dent, nothing. It’s even resistant to electrical charges.”

Rey shook her head in shock, impressed. “This is amazing. Do you realize what you could do with this kind of material?”

His grin grew bigger. “Guess what?”

She hated when people asked that. “What?”

“Theoretically, it will resist the plasma strike of a lightsaber.”

Now that was impressive. “ _Really_?”

Ben let out a breath. “Theoretically, of course. I didn’t have a lightsaber to test it, and honestly, it scares me to death to do it only because it’s my costume and I really want to show it off before I do any experiments on it—actually, that’s what I have brewing in the airlock, that’s why I need a lab in space. The torillium required to make it nearly indestructible requires a special processing—look, this is what I mean.”

He popped a tiny ball off his highly advanced comm bracelet and placed it on a crate. It projected a large square. Ben pointed his finger and started drawing letters connected to one another by lines. “In the standard polymer used in armor, you have this chain bound to this, which leaves it lightweight enough but survives a decent amount of impact. Now—” He started drawing frantically, and as far as Rey was concerned, he was writing in some forgotten language. “—you see here as we add the torillium, this causes this chain to compact like this but opens up this chain here, and this one is bound at this matrix…”

Rey completely lost all track of what he was saying, but his crazy grid of letters and lines grew into some giant display that would be beautiful if it made half an ounce of sense. Instead of trying to figure out what he was saying, she admired this giant, strong creature in a cape, reminiscent of the most famous Dark Sider of all time, reminiscent of _him_ even, chattering endlessly about elements and chains and vacuums in space allowing something to do something.

“And there!” He tapped the last mark he made. “So see? According to this, it should survive lightsaber strikes. Once I have a new batch, maybe…” He eyed her hip. “Maybe you might want to test it for me.” That exuberant excitement quieted into the anxious, shrunken creature that usually jolted if she looked at him the wrong way.

Why did he have to look so cute like that?

She nodded. “I’d be glad to help you. Perhaps by then, you’ll have your own lightsaber back.”

Ben shook his head as he returned to the crate to pack his costume. “Uncle Luke is never giving that back to me. I don’t know why we’re bothering.” He stuffed the helmet and detached the cape.

“You don’t know that. Besides, I promise, we are leaving with that lightsaber. If he won’t give it to you, I’ll make sure it comes with us, regardless.”

He gave her a look of utter disbelief before pulling the rest of the costume off. He was back to that nice little tank top that showed off his shoulders and arms. “You seriously underestimate Uncle Luke, both his stubbornness and his power.”

Rey shrugged. “Maybe you underestimate me.”

Ben dropped something that rolled into a corner. “Oh I would never do that, I’m just saying—GAHHHH!”

Rey thought she’d be used to his screaming by now, but this had her curious.

He spun out of the corner, flailing and batting at himself. “SPIDER WEB! SPIDER WEB!”

This had to be a joke. “Are you—”

“GET’EM OFF! GET’EM OFF!”

She was glad he took off the Darth Vader costume, because she never wanted to think of one of the most dangerous Sith warriors of all time flapping around like a lunatic screaming about spiders.

“THEY’RE IN MY HAIR!”

Rey slapped him. Ben reeled and turned to her, mouth wide open, stunned. “You hit me.”

Rey shrugged. “There was a spider on your face.”

His eyes widened even more. He let out a horrified cry and rubbed at his face, pawing at it. “Ugh! Ugh! Nasty!” He hunched over and rubbed his fingers vigorously through his hair. “Oh by the Force, they’re in my hair, I feel them, it’s itchy!” He charged at her and flopped his mane down in front of her. “Please! Are they in there? Can you see them?”

Rey sighed and shook her head before digging into the ebony waves. “Well, there’s some spiderweb—”

“AAAARGH nasty! Damnit! I told my father to make sure there were no spiderwebs when we left!”

She continued to dig and then realized how incredibly soft and smooth his hair was. Every dig was heaven on her fingertips. Instead of searching for rogue spiders (that probably weren’t there anyway,) she sifted his hair through her fingers, letting the strands fall in silky locks back down around his face. Made her wonder how it would feel against her lips. She wasn’t sure how long she had been doing that, but eventually, he tilted his head up to look at her.

Those huge sweet eyes, framed by his fluffy hair…she could feel it, that warmth, that connection, something that touched her in ways nothing ever had.

She had wanted guys less and did far more in such a short time. But this one…he was so special, innocent and sweet, brilliant and quirky, vibrant and genuine.

Everything she ever sensed, felt, or saw in visions of Ben Solo faltered at the reality. In dreams, he was so much more like _him._ He was shadowed, broken, cold, desperate, furious, and terribly alone. When she knew she had to find Ben Solo, she expected the dark monster in the flowing cape. Instead, that was a costume, and the creature inside was more light than she’d ever seen in anyone.

Was this a result of suppressing his power? Or was this really just him?

She almost thought to kiss him, looking at her the way he did, so darn cute and edible. But something told her to hold off, let things build. Funny, she’d never heard that one before.

She cupped his cheek, and he made a sound that had her concerned he might faint again. “I see no spiders. I think you’re fine.”

He nodded, straightened, and shuffled away from her, a perpetual bag of nerves. Then he scratched at his head. And again.

Rey tilted her head toward the corridor. “Why don’t you hit the shower? Make sure it’s all gone.”

He nodded, swallowed, and skirted out of the room. Rey shook her head and chuckled into her hand.

Finn slid into the room with a huge grin on his face. “There was no spider no his face, was there?”

Rey snorted. “No. Worked though.”

Finn laughed before nodding toward the entrance. “He is madly in love with you.”

“I wouldn’t call that love.” She headed toward the corridor. “Infatuation maybe. Utter shock, perhaps. I expect he’d probably react that way if any woman showed him an ounce of attention.”

“I don’t know.” Finn followed close behind. “I think it’s personal toward you.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Who has time for romance?”

Finn grabbed her shoulder. “Hey, you feeling okay?”

Rey didn’t feel like having this conversation. “Yeah.”


	3. Pirates and Plates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's the best way to handle a standoff? Panic! Ben learns a lot more about Rey than he bargained for, and she finds someone capable of softening her hardened heart.
> 
>   
>    
> 

“How long until Ossus?” Rey asked, standing with her arms crossed in the cockpit of the Millenium Falcon. Finn flanked her rear, and Ben was lost in the ship somewhere.

“Twelve hours,” Han said.

Rey nodded. “Alert me one hour before arrival so I can prepare.”

Han turned in his seat. “Listen little lady, I don’t know what Finn and Poe let you get away with, but I am the captain of this ship, not your servant. Set an alarm for yourself.”

Rey looked down at him. Time to see exactly what she was dealing with. “We can do this mission the easy way or the hard way. I suggest you go with the easy way and follow my lead.”

Han laughed. “Oh, that’s adorable. Hey, I get it, you’re pushing what, all of eighteen? Think you know it all?” Han leaned back in his pilot’s chair. “Well, this is the point at which you learn that you can’t always be in charge, and that some of us have been doing this a long time, and therefore, have far more experience and seniority. Now, can we do with less attitude?”

Rey put her hands on her hips. “Speak to me again like I’m a child and see what happens.”

Han and Chewbacca gave each other an incredulous laugh. Finn cleared his throat to get her attention. “Hey, we can all keep things cool, right? Come on, Rey, this is Han Solo we’re talking to here, I don’t—”

“I can handle it!”

Finn cleared his throat again. “Okay…”

Han slid the tips of his fingers into his pockets. “Hey kid, I get it. Feeling for the pecking order. Been there done that many times. How about we come to an agreement, huh? You are in charge of your mission, and I am in charge of my ship.” His eyes grew sharp and serious. “And I don’t take orders on my ship.”

He was right, she was feeling him out. She watched his eyes as well as Chewbacca’s. A light glance toward her hip told her they noticed what she was carrying.

Rey drew two of her laser pistols at the same time Han and Chewbacca pointed theirs. She was impressed. She’d never met anyone as fast as her on the draw.

“Whoa,” Finn said his hands raised, “okay folks, no reason for things to get messy.”

Han grinned. “I couldn’t figure it out at first. Getting a little old here, I admit it, almost had forgotten, but I knew I had seen it somewhere a long time ago. Wasn’t until you got a little pushy that it started feeling familiar all over again.”

Ben walked into the cockpit and eyed the four guns. “Are we in danger?”

“Gee, I don’t know, Ben!” Han said, irritated. “Woman has a gun on your father and uncle, what do _you_ think?”

Finn raised his hands again in a calming manner. “No one’s in danger, we’re all cool here, right Rey?”

Rey didn’t move. “When they lower their weapons, we’ll be cool.”

Han snickered but kept his gun in place. “How is Shirac?”

“Wouldn’t know nowadays, but last I left him he was doing well.”

“Oh, well good for him. Now you want to tell me what a space pirate wants with us before things _do_ get ugly?”

Ben gasped. “Space pirate? Like…like a for real space pirate?”

“No, it’s one of your stupid costume dork games you insist on playing at your age—YES a real space pirate! Your little sugar pie over here isn’t who she says she is.”

Rey remained rigid but expanded her senses over to Ben to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. Nope, he wasn’t moving. She wasn’t sure he was breathing. She kept her gaze locked on Han. “What gave it away?”

“Your guns. Shirac always had them specially made just for his crew, that style, that type of metal, it was a signature of the Rock-Hounds. That is what your crew called themselves, isn’t it sweetheart?”

In a fuzzy, faint voice, Ben said, “F-fun fact, rock collectors, such as myself, call ourselves rockhounds…” The final word fizzled into gasping breath.

“Damnit Ben! No one cares right now! So what is it you want from us, little lady? For real this time?”

Rey tried to get Ben’s gasping out of her head. “I didn’t lie. Everything is exactly as I told you, all except the space pirate thing. I don’t run with them anymore. I left.”

Han nodded. “Nice try, but no one leaves Shirac.”

“I didn’t give him a choice.”

“That so?”

Finn tried again. “Look, folks, I’m sure Rey would be glad to tell you her story if we could all perhaps put our guns away, huh? Especially since Ben is over here—I’m not sure, I think he’s dying, he needs help.”

Rey shifted to keep the two men in her vision while being able to see Ben in her peripherals. He was crouched against the wall heaving panicked breaths and looking more pale than usual, which was impressive.

Han rolled his eyes. “He’s just hyperventilating, Ben get a damn storage bag to breathe into, for fuck’s sake.” Ben just shook his head and flailed one hand. “Damnit—Threepio! Sexbot! Get my coward of a son a bag from the galley before he passes out, will you?”

“Not—” Ben heaved. “—a sexbot!”

In the distance they heard C3PO’s professional panic. “Oh my, master Ben needs my help. Oh where are the storage bags?”

Finn said, “Know what? I’m going to help Threepio, and you three are just going to go ahead and not shoot each other, right?”

Han didn’t move. “Once she convinces me she’s not still tied to Shirac.”

Finn made a face begging her to end the standoff before he rushed off to the galley. She tried to ignore Ben’s gasping, but it wouldn’t leave her. Panic, she felt it in waves pouring off of him. She never felt that with anyone before. Was this a result of their dyad strengthening, how very little contact they’d had?

It was forcing her hand stronger than anything else. She wanted to hit him upside the head for getting in the way, yet felt just as compelled to grasp him and calm him down. If this was a dyad thing, she really didn’t want any part of it. She didn’t want anything throwing her off during a situation.

After hearing Finn shouting, asking where the damn bags were, she finally holstered her weapons. Han and Chewbacca hesitated, then followed suit.

“Third shelf on the right!” Han called. “Behind the pickles!”

Rey holstered her weapons and backed up until she reached Ben. She knelt down and thrust an arm out when Finn dashed in with the bag in his hand. After flicking it open with one hand, she held it to Ben’s nose and mouth. He kept his wide, brown eyes on her while the bag inflated and deflated. The desperate heaves slowed.

In a tiny voice, Ben asked, “Are you really a space pirate?”

Rey stood, returning her gaze to Han. “Former, but yes. What do you want to know first, how I left or why I left?”

Han shrugged. “Surprise me.”

She crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. “When I knew I had to go, I told Shirac. I said it was a matter of life and death for the galaxy and that no one would be safe, not even space pirates like us. I told him I had a destiny beyond his fleet, and I had to live it out. I thanked him for taking care of me for most of my life.”

“Shirac doesn’t get paid in thanks.”

Rey smirked. “Oh he’s been paid plenty over the years in all the loot I’ve directed his way. He had exclusive use of my powers since I was four. I made him a very happy man during that time. My debts were paid long before I ever left, I assure you that. In a wide variety of services.”

Han closed his eyes. “Shit, kid…”

“Not what you’re thinking, but before you go getting weird on me, I’m twenty, a full adult, thank you very much, and no one ever touched me against my will. They didn’t dare. They knew I’d kill for less.”

Han nodded. “Good to know.”

Ben turned his head back and forth, the bag still over his face. “Know what?”

Han sighed. “If you have to ask—shut up, boy.”

Rey strolled the bridge. “Shirac knew he couldn’t stop me. He tried to convince me, but once I’m set on something, there is no changing my mind, and he knew that. He also knew if he tried to stop me, I’d kill his entire crew before any of their weapons could touch me.”

Han put his feet up. “Alright, that’s the how. What’s the why?”

“Palpatine of course. I learned of his plans, knew he needed to be defeated, knew I had to be the one to do it, that is, until I learned I needed my dyad in the Force alongside me when I did so.”

“That’s a big jump from space pirate to hero of the galaxy.”

Rey leaned against the edge of the instrument panel. “Tell me something, what do you value most?”

Han shrugged. “Oh, I don’t know. My family, adventure…” He glanced at Chewbacca. “…friendship, the Falcon.”

Ben put his finger up. “I value innovation and forward progress through science and discovery!”

Han blinked at him. “Good for you.”

Rey sighed and smiled. “Well I value life.”

“Awfully simplistic.”

“Not for me. My father died a few months after I was born from an illness no one could cure. My mother, herself one of Shirac’s crew, died during a raid when I was four. Life to me is precious, ironic, I know, considering how much death I deal on a daily basis. But it’s the one thing you can’t get back once it’s gone, the one thing that has all the potential in the universe, for good or evil, and Palpatine has no right to take that away from so many. I have the power, I have the destiny, so I left Shirac to fulfill it.” She shrugged. “The end.”

“That was beautiful,” Ben said.

Rey smiled. His eyes sprung wide as plates and he disappeared back down the corridor. She shook her head, chuckling. A mess, but a cute mess.

Han leaned over to Chewbacca. “What do you think?” After a light gurgling response and a shrug, Han nodded. “Alright, that satisfies us enough. Guess it’s not so shocking to see you trying to take over. Hierarchy in the pirate business is serious stuff. But how about we compromise and stick to the original plan? Your mission is yours, my ship is mine, and don’t give me orders.” Chewbacca howled. “Us, don’t give _us_ orders.”

Rey stood. “Fair enough.” Halfway toward the corridor, she smiled. “I’m glad we had this confrontation.”

Han huffed. “Yeah, sure, hey, we could have just talked, but why do that when we can point our guns in each other’s faces?”

“Exactly! Makes it more real, you know? Life and death, there’s no room for nonsense at the barrel of a gun, am I right?”

Han stared at her, then laughed. “Ah hell, I like you, kid. You’re something else.” He nodded toward the corridor. “You sound more like my kid than he does.”

#

With tensions calmed, guns holstered, and Ben breathing again, dinner time rolled around.

“Aw, Daaaad!” Ben slunk in exasperation. “You were supposed to use my special plate!”

Han pointed a spatula at him. “Your mother may put up with that nonsense but I’m not! Just eat your damn dinner and shut up.”

Ben pointed. “The meat sauce is touching the pasta. You know I can’t handle things touching! That’s why I brought my plate. It keeps everything separate—oh for the love of the Force, it’s right there! You totally ignored it!”

“Yes, yes I did.” He pointed to the others in the galley. “You see anyone else complaining?”

Ben pursed his lips. “They’re not as sensitive as I am!”

“Well you’re going to have to learn to not be so sensitive for once. I told your mother, from day one, she’s always babying you and your—” He put his fingers up in air quotes. “—sensitivities. I’m trying to make a man out of you, and you’re over here complaining about your special plate.”

“But you put the meat right on top—it’s seeping into the vegetables now!”

“Too damn bad!”

Chewbacca roared and threw a spoon at Ben.

“Ow! Uncle Chewy!”

Finn laughed into his arms. “I can’t believe I’m watching this.”

Rey sighed, her food barely touched. “Me neither.”

Ben shoved his plate forward. “Dad, you take this one and give me the next batch.”

“No!” Han said. “You take what I give you!”

“It won’t even make a difference to you!”

“I’m not caving in to your stupidity! Now go sit down or you’re going to wear that plate!”

“Come on! It’s not even—OW! Uncle Chewy! That was a fork! I could have lost an eye!”

Finn nearly fell out of his seat. “I can’t! I just can’t!”

Ben took a breath. “Dad, as your son, who never asks for anything—”

“Oh bullshit!” Han said. “What about half the crap in that basement?”

“I paid for that! Okay, you got me the display cases, and the base chemistry set, and the datapad console, but it was my birthday—just give me a new serving—”

“BEN!” Rey barked.

Ben leapt and nearly dropped his plate on Han. The room silenced. He turned to her and the sharp, dangerous look in her eyes made him want to slink out of the galley and barricade himself in a crate.

She folded her hands and rested her chin on them. “Ben, tell me something, when was the last time you had to go without food?”

Ben traced back over his adulthood down into his childhood. “I think sometimes I forget to eat when I’m busy in a project—”

“Tell me, have you been in wild space, your ship disabled because components have failed or fuel supplies have run out, hoping, desperate for a passing ship, picking at the possible scant crumbs scattered on the galley floor because you and your entire crew have not eaten for days? Have you had to seriously consider which one of you would be willing to sacrifice himself for the crew? Have you had to wonder if you would have to eat the person you grew up with? Or wondered if it may just be you?”

Ben stared at her, his heart at full stop. He couldn’t imagine such a horrible situation. “N-no.”

She smiled, but there was no joy behind it. “Well I have. Four times. Sit down and eat your food as is and consider yourself fortunate you never had to go through what I’ve been through.”

Ben flooded with a mix of horror, sadness, and hurt for the pretty girl who honestly scared the hell out of him a little more than usual. Didn’t help learning she was a former space pirate. He simply nodded, slid into a seat, and tipped his head down so he couldn’t see her boring into him with those piercing eyes.

Han threw his hands up. “ _That’s_ all it took? Where the hell you been all this kid’s life?”

Ben’s heart pounded as he forced the creamy pasta laden with meat sauce into his mouth. His brain screamed at him, telling him how wrong it was and how the universe would definitely end because of it. But his tongue…he raised his brow and kept chewing. “Actually, this isn’t so bad. They kinda taste good together.”

“See that?” Han said with extreme sarcasm.

“And to think,” Finn said, “if you stuck to your special plate, you’d never have made this discovery.”

Ben dropped his jaw at the realization. “You’re right! What kind of discoveries am I missing being so rigid and stuck in my ways? I never thought about it that way, that’s fascinating you’re…” He stopped when he saw Rey. Her head was tilted down, food barely eaten. “Rey? You okay?”

“Yeah,” was her simple answer.

“Are…you upset because you shared that story? Oh no, I don’t want to be the reason you’re upset.” He dug his fingernails into his palms to suppress the anxiety.

She forced a half smile. “No, nothing to do with you at all, or the story. That’s a mild one.” If that was mild, he’d hate to hear about what else she’s been through. “I’m just tired.”

Ben nodded. “I’ve been up over twenty-four hours, I think, I kind of lost track.” He pulled a bottle of Hyper-Fuel from his pocket. “That’s what this is for, keeps me going.”

Han growled as he sat down. “Stop drinking that shit! You’re going to wind up with migraines again.”

“Oh, and Corellian whiskey is better?”

Han filled his glass. “Yes it is, thank you very much! Now cut it out with that shit and get some actual sleep for once.”

“I _will_ , jeez.” He scraped the last bits of pasta and vegetables into his mouth. “That was actually really good, any more left?”

Han groaned in frustration. “You do this every time we go out in the Falcon. I told you, we keep the supplies managed by portioning and not going over. Cut the crap.”

“But I’m a lot bigger than you!”

Chewy cried out and threw his hand up.

“Okay fine, you’re bigger, but still! I burned off a lot of calories with Holo-dancer—”

Han threw his hand up. “That’s your excuse?”

Rey pushed her plate toward Ben. “Here.”

Ben instantly felt terrible. “Rey, no, I’m not taking this from you.”

“I’m not really hungry.” She stood then lightly smiled at Han. “It was delicious, don’t take that as an insult. I’m just not feeling well. Think I’m just tired. I’ll be better in the morning.”

Ben couldn’t let her go without eating. “Rey—”

She thrust one hand up and he knew instantly that the conversation was over. She stepped out of the galley.

Ben stared down at the plate slid before him, worried about her. She seemed a little more than just tired, though he had no rational explanation why he felt that way.

“Well?” Han said. “You gonna eat that or fight Chewy for it?”

Ben, unable to stop looking out the doorway, slid half of Rey’s plate onto his and gave Chewbacca the rest.

#

Ben crept into the bunk area, still feeling apprehensive any time it came to Rey. The lights had dimmed on the ship, quiet now except for the light hum of the engines. He’d already changed into his shirt and soft pajama pants, his socked feet warm against the cold floor.

She was turned away from him in her bunk, her armor and weapon belts off but stowed beside her. She was down to a light tank top that showed the smooth, lightly tanned skin of her back. He never knew a back could be so lovely, but hers sure was. He seriously didn’t want to wake her, but… “Rey,” he whispered with the utmost of softness.

“What?” came her sharp response.

He stretched his arm out, terrified of getting too close, inching his way along.

She turned toward him, annoyed. “Well?” Ben held out the container at the end of his fingertips. She looked at it, then back at him. “What’s this?”

“I…when…if I’m not feeling good…it’s nutritious, and-and soothing. It’s good.” In his other hand, he presented a spoon.

She sighed. “I told you I wasn’t hungry.”

“I know, but if in the middle of the night…” He had a hard time meeting her eyes because he fell in love every time he did and usually did something stupid because of it. So he just glanced at them and tried to take his gaze elsewhere. “I…wouldn’t want you to feel hungry like that again, so keep it as a snack in case you need it, so you don’t have to be reminded of that.”

Her perpetual glare of irritation melted into something so much softer, perhaps touched by the gesture. “That’s…very sweet of you.” She took a breath and nodded before reaching for the items. “Thank you, I appreciate that.”

Ben nodded, warming. “There’s a button there to close the door on the bunk if you want some privacy. I-I’m going to be across the way over there, but I’ll keep my door open in case you need something in the middle of the night.”

She smiled. “That’s not necessary. I’ve slept through hell before, don’t worry.”

“I know, but…I’m here. Just saying.”

“Okay, thank you.”

Ben smiled and darted to the other side of the room, able to breathe now that he wasn’t so close to her. He climbed into the bunk and settled in to watch a show on his comm bracelet before drifting off.

“Ben?”

He turned at once. “Yeah, Rey?”

“You’re too good for this galaxy.”

Ben felt a well of emotion rise in his throat. That was one of the sweetest things anyone had said to him who wasn’t programmed to do so. “That’s not true. I’m a mess, remember?”

“Then the galaxy needs more messes like you. Goodnight, Ben.” Her bunk door closed.

He just stared at the door, simply because she was behind it. “Night Rey.”

#

It was horrid. So much lightning, so many drastic forms. Acrid smoke, chants humming an ominous beat that chilled his bones. But once Ben stood before Rey, once he looked into her eyes, so sweet and innocent, three little buns in her hair, he felt like his full and true self.

He didn’t know what he was going to do, but it would be beside her.

They readied their sabers, and split seconds later were frozen by the emperor, their lightsabers scattering. His life force began siphoning out of him, draining into that horrid creature. Beside him, Rey struggled against the same. No! He had to save her! She meant everything! But he couldn’t move, could barely breathe, and was weakening, so…so damn weak.

He fell to the ground, body so depleted he might as well have been at death’s door. He could barely look at Rey but saw she was in the same shape he was. Meanwhile, that monster stood and walked, having stolen their life force, stolen the power of their dyad, and used it for himself.

He had to get to Rey. Had to do something. She was his life!

The emperor must have seen him stirring. Flung up on the Force with no power to stop it, Ben was tossed like garbage down a hole.

He lost count of how many times he struck rock, his ankle shattering, ribs breaking, just battered until he could summon just enough power to stop himself before his head struck. He lowered himself and stared up at the platform so high above him. This was going to be a long climb, but he was going to do it. He had to get to her. She mattered more than anything.

The pain was horrendous but irrelevant, and he barely mustered enough Force to assist. Shouts, screams, blasts, so much noise from everywhere at once, but he couldn’t focus on what was happening outside his current situation. He just had to get up there. Focus…focus… Somehow, by some miracle, he made it to the top.

It was all blasted away. The chanting hordes, gone. The emperor, gone. The temple nothing but ruins.

And there she lay.

Struggling against the pain of too many broken bones and internal bleeding, he forced himself to her, pulled her into his arms, and looked into her lifeless eyes.

No…NO!

He looked around desperate. What could he do? What could he possibly do to save her? Nothing mattered if it wasn’t with her! She deserved life! What had he ever done but cause destruction and death? No, she deserved life far more than he did.

And he would give it to her.

A Force dyad, the power of life itself, triumph over death—

Ben woke gasping, body shaking. He ran his hand through his hair to find himself drenched with sweat. That dream was horrifying. He didn’t understand any of it, or why he felt so bad about himself (honestly, the only destruction he could fully be accused of was the Jedi Temple, but no one died.) But he knew one thing—he would not let anything like that happen to Rey. He may be nearly powerless, weak, terrible with a lightsaber, a worrywart, picky, sensitive, and terrified of insects, but no matter what, he would never let anyone hurt Rey.

He also knew one more thing—they could not face off against Palpatine like that. They needed a better plan.

But first, their dyad had to be at full strength. He had a lot of work to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok yeah, so weird dream there, huh? To allay any concerns regarding the references to the depressing stuff from TROS, basically, I'm treating the Sequel Trilogy as if it was a set of visions of what could have been, and a guidepost of, "Wow, that seems like a bad idea, let's not do that." This will be addressed more in Chapter 5 when Ben finally learns his powers have been suppressed and why.


	4. Hand Holding, Among Other Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Ben, could a fiery space pirate ever love your adorably nerdy self? He's not so sure, but when Rey gets tired of him having a panic attack in her presence, she decides he needs something to help him relax...
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get a bit steamy, well, steamy-ish, well, you'll see...

“Come on, see if you can do a little better.”

It was impossible. Ben lifted the cup a few inches off the table. That was the best he could do with his Force powers.

Rey nodded. “Good, now float it over to me.”

Ben pushed with everything he had in him, his hand shaking. The cup wobbled and fell back to the table. He flopped back and sighed. “See? That’s it. That’s all I can do.”

Rey massaged her temples. “Let’s get you meditating. The more you connect with the Force, the better you’ll do.”

“That was proven to be false on numerous occasions. I actually devised a mathematical formula to show the ratio of my efforts to my failures. Want to see it?”

Rey blinked. “No.”

“But it’s really—”

“I said no.”

“Okay…” Ben wished she had said yes. Math would have calmed him down in her presence. Thankfully, he could still picture the formula in his head. “Well, if you don’t believe me, just wait. In a few hours, Luke will tell you all about my ineptitude.”

Rey stood. “Well maybe he was a lousy teacher. Ever think of that?”

Ben shrugged and swallowed his nerves. For someone smaller than him, she always seemed more imposing when she stood. Didn’t help learning she was a space pirate. “Everyone else in the school seemed to do just fine.” He shook his head. “It’s me. I’m just pathetic like everyone always says.”

“Hey.”

A hand cupped his chin, and his entire body turned to panicky stone.

Rey’s thumb brushed over his stubble. He really needed to shave. “You are not pathetic, you hear me? It’s not your fault they…” She stopped, looked aside.

“They what? Who’s they?”

She took in a breath, frowning. “It’s not your fault they can’t see you the way I do. And I think you’re brilliant.”

He wondered if she could hear his heart pounding. He made lots of nonsensical shapes with his lips before finally eeking out a word. “Really?”

She nodded and straightened. “You’re just in your own way. Come on. Meditate with me this time. Maybe we’ll get you closer than Luke ever could.”

She took his hand and led him down the corridor. She was holding his hand! Hers was so warm and soft, so small in his, but it still held an edge that said she would rip someone’s face off if she had to.

That was both terrifying and hot.

As they sat in the out of the way storage area, door shut to any disturbances, he couldn’t help but keep peeking at her. She was so still, so perfectly connected to everything around her. He could feel that much on the Force. She was so powerful, so strong, so fiery, so beautiful—

“Focus!”

Ben jumped and clamped his eyes shut again. Open…feel…

Nope, the only thing he felt was her. Warmth, beauty, spice, her wild hair fluttering in the wind—

“Concentrate!”

Now his heart was pounding, a mix of getting startled, his general anxiety, and being in a closed room with a beautiful woman who didn’t spit at him or hit him with things. He tried not to let his eyes open, but they did anyway. Her profile was so perfect, sweet little nose, everything in perfect proportion, body well-muscled yet still soft and delicate.

What was he thinking? A girl like that would never see anything in a goofy dork like him. He made her pick spiders out of his hair! Bet she already had a guy, like that Poe with the strangely dreamy eyes or even Finn who was almost as good at Holo-dancer as he was.

“DON’T FOCUS ON ME!”

Ben sprung backwards and fell over. He pushed himself to the wall and propped himself up. “I told you I wasn’t good at this.”

Rey sighed and rested her chin on her hands. “Ben, I know, but I need you. The galaxy needs you. We have to find a way to expand your powers.”

Ben shrugged. “Like I said, it’s hopeless. I’m just not that strong. I can’t…” He shook his head. “…be something I’m not. If I could…maybe I wouldn’t be so alone all the time.” He stood and opened the door, feeling stupid for having said way more than he should.

“Hey!” Her sharp voice made him freeze halfway out the door. “Turn around.”

He obeyed, unable to stop himself, but drew his hands up to his chest. Damn she made him nervous.

“I’m not asking you to be something you’re not. That’s just it, Ben. I know you can. I know it’s in there.” She sighed. “Maybe when we talk to Luke, get your saber back, we’ll try again. Believe me when I say you have a lot more potential in you. I know because you are my dyad, and I am very strong. We just have to wake you up inside, that’s all.”

Ben tried to smile. In his thirty years, that never happened, and he had no evidence it would start now. “Okay.”

She tilted her head toward the corridor. “Go.”

He nodded and only felt like he could start breathing again once he was far away from her. This would turn out like all the others, and he still couldn’t stop himself regardless of knowing the end result. He’d drive himself insane pining for someone who would never touch him in a thousand years. It would throw off his concentration, possess his soul, and in the end he would just be aching and broken.

Usually he’d put as much distance between himself and the object of his affections as possible, but this time it was not a possibility. She needed him. He had to help her save the galaxy.

He had to keep her alive.

All this was way too much to process. He needed something to take his mind off of it.

#

Ben sat at the technical station soldering a small fusion rocket to a belt strap. Finn stepped into the lounge area, looked around, and leaned in toward Ben.

“Hey, is Chewy playing holo-chess by himself?”

Ben didn’t look up from his work. “Nah—you done yet?”

Chewbacca growled, then after a few moments gave a softer response.

“Position?” Ben listened for the answer while he attached the wing generator module. “Ring 1, position 5, move to ring 2, position three, ability attack, checkmate.”

Chewbacca roared and launched an emergency med-pack at Ben’s head.

“Come on!” Ben cried. “You’re gonna make me screw up the module!” Chewbacca barked once and stormed out of the room.

Finn held his hands up. “Wait a minute. Were you playing against him?”

“Yeah.” Ben tapped his comm bracelet. “Wing command five.” Pieces of metal poured out of the fusion rocket and expanded into one solid unit.

Finn looked back and forth. “From here?”

Ben tapped again to retract the wings. “Uh huh.”

“What the—how?”

“Game board is stored in my head. He tells me where he moved, I tell him where to move mine. And he can’t cheat because I remember every position, but I do have to check from time to time because he still tries.”

“Holy shit, you actually win like that?”

Ben fired the tiny torch to add the other module. “Yep. Every time.”

“While doing this?”

“Yuh huh.”

“Wow…” Finn sat. “You’re incredible.”

“You’d be the first besides Melanie and my mother to think so.”

“Now I know that’s not true. Think you can teach me to beat Chewy?”

“Mmm, he’s tough to beat, but I can help you up your game.”

“Yeah man, that would be wild.”

Ben finally looked up from his work. He smiled softly. “It’s almost like we’re friends.”

“Sure, man. I’m cool with that. We seem to like the same things, though I will beat you in Holo-dancer. I was just tired yesterday.”

Ben chuckled. “You sure can try.”

“Ohhhh, I see how it is.”

Ben’s smile fell. “Did I say something wrong?”

“What? No, why?” Finn shrugged. “We’re just two guys talking, ribbing a little, nothing wrong here.”

Ben briefly smiled and returned to his work. “I don’t make friends easily. Or often. Or…you know, at all. Sometimes people want to hang around but not for long, not once I get talking. I say too much about my experiments and theoretical particle physics and start arguing why some top scientist is wrong, and they just lose interest.” He shrugged. “Or I just say something stupid because of my anxiety.”

“What do you have to be anxious about?”

Ben paused. “I don’t know. I don’t think about it. My mind’s just elsewhere, focused on so many other things. I don’t always understand social dynamics, and it makes me nervous because then everyone gets pissed off and wants to throw me out an airlock, and I don’t see what I did wrong until it’s too late.”

“Okay, well I’ll keep that in mind and work real hard to be your friend.”

Ben tilted his head. “Why?”

Finn crossed his arms. “Because you look like you need one.”

Ben smiled and broke into a laugh. “Well, okay. And I’ll try real hard not to screw it up.”

“Sounds like a plan.” He held his hand out.

Ben shook it, nodded, and cleared his throat. “So, are you dating Rey?”

Finn crackled into laughter. “Oh boy.”

“Shit, I said something wrong, didn’t I?”

“Nah man, just out of left field, that’s all. Relax, I’m not dating Rey.”

Ben scraped his fingertips across the smooth surface of the technical station. “Do you plan to?”

Finn held his hands up. “I’ll just flat out tell you it’s not an option. I admit, when I first met her, I…very politely asked her if she’d like to go out on a date. She responded with a gun under my chin, so I took the hint and didn’t try to cross that line again.”

Ben just stared with his jaw open. “Oh wow.”

Finn nodded. “Poe got shoved against the lockers. This other guy? She launched him into the air and dumped him in a lake. We all just stopped trying after that. Though I hear one or two of the girls tried, and she was a lot nicer to them. Still turned them down, though.”

Ben returned his gaze to his work, his stomach in forty-five knots. “I’m doomed.”

“Nah you’re not, man. Just trust me.”

Ben shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. “She’ll kill me. She’ll obliterate me!”

“She won’t—”

“Oh please! If she did that to you and Poe, what’s she going to do to a giant nerd like me?” Ben buried his head in his arms. “Knew I shouldn’t have gotten so infatuated. It never works out for me.”

“Ah, so you do have the hots for her. I mean, you couldn’t have made it more obvious—”

Ben groaned and punched himself in the head.

“Don’t do that. Look, I am not going to get involved because she will rip my arm off if I do. I’ll only say this: you are the first man I’ve ever seen her be kind to, like actual kindness.”

Ben picked his head up. “Well, you’re her friend. She’s kind to you, right?”

Finn leaned forward. “She picked spiderwebs out of your hair. Man, if I had done that same thing, freaking out like that, she would have kicked me in the face. If she’s nice to you, I’d take that as a good sign.”

Ben brightened. “Really? Well how do I stay on her good side, what do I do? Should I be doing something? Maybe I should—”

“Don’t _try_ anything. Just be exactly who you are. She sees through bullshit. If she likes you right now as is, just stay that way, trust me.”

Ben sunk. “It’s being who I am that usually drives everyone away.”

“Well, not this time.” Finn patted his back. “Let her lead and be authentic. That’s all I can tell you.”

Ben rested his head on his arms once Finn left. Melanie never prepared him for this sort of relationship.

#

Rey readied her gear, tightening the straps on her belts and armor. They still had two hours to go before reaching Ossus, but she was getting antsy.

Legendary Luke Skywalker…

She didn’t know what to expect, but they were leaving with Ben’s lightsaber, end of story.

She turned at the sound of a deep voice muttering. Ben flew into the bunk area, yattering on and on about thermocouplers, blown resistors, and what idiot thought that design was a good idea. She stood in silence, watching him rifle through his items while his internal conversation blossomed into some mathematical formula and why his was right and someone else’s was wrong.

He was so in his own head, he still didn’t know she was standing there right across from him.

He projected that screen again and started writing numbers and letters in some secret language she sure as hell didn’t understand. Then he poked at it and shouted, “Right there! And he gets all the credit while my document gets ignored. Wait until I publish my rebuttal. Chief General of Science doesn’t even know how to calculate a simple formula…”

If that nonsense he just drew in the sky was simple, she didn’t want to see hard. Maybe he needed five projectors for that one.

Ben turned. “And if he’s going to hand out prizes to idiots like that then—ACK!” He leapt up and fumbled the component in his hand. Rey darted across the open space and grabbed it as it flew out of his fingers.

She held up the…whatever it was. “Drop something?”

He was back to that wide-eyed stare, his lips making all kinds of movements like he wanted to speak or contemplated leaping out the ship. Rey stepped close, and he backed up against the bunk like she had a knife to his chest. 

She sighed, waving the electronic item. “You have got to calm down in my presence. It’s getting old.”

“I’m sorry,” he sputtered. His hand extended to the gadget, and he snatched it out of her hand with a goofy grin.

Rey put her hands on her hips. “What am I going to do with you? Why are you still this way around me? You seem to be just fine with Finn.”

Ben nodded. “He’s cool.”

Rey tilted her head. “And what about me?” Ben shrugged. “Is it the space pirate thing?”

“Kind of…sometimes…but no, not really.”

Rey nodded. Time to get to the point. “You head over heels for me?”

His eyes nearly fell out of his head. He opened his mouth wide, as if to protest, then remained that way. It really was comical, but she couldn’t laugh at him. Too many had done that already.

Rey grabbed a lock of her hair and twirled it against her lips. “Listen, let’s lay it all out on the line because this is getting tiresome, and I don’t have time for it. Are you attracted to me, yes or no?”

His face twisted into the cutest attempt to say something she had ever seen, eyebrows high, cheeks pushing his eyes into crescents, mouth a grimace of fear and complication. Then he let out a high-pitched, “Yes,” that didn’t sound like it should come out of someone so tall.

Rey smiled. “See? Was that so hard?”

His face didn’t change. “I can’t breathe.”

Rey flinched. “What do you mean you can’t—”

His eyes rolled back, and he collapsed. She caught him on the Force just before he hit the floor. She shook her head. He was officially, certifiably ridiculous. She lifted him onto his bunk and stretched him out.

After a few minutes, his eyes fluttered open. He looked about, saw her, and sprung backwards against the curvature of the bunk wall. Those dark eyes stayed on her, disoriented, anxious, but so incredibly cute and pure while he pressed his soft lips together.

She had to do something about him. He needed to relax, especially around her. Not only was this just getting stupid already, but he couldn’t focus while meditating and _needed_ to gain his full power. Time was running out.

Rey reached out with the Force to signal the doors to close and lock. She sat at the edge of the bunk and put her hand on his chest, eliciting a soft squeak. “Listen, we need to have a little talk.”

His mouth moved a few times, those plump lips catching one another. “It’s okay if you hate me.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “I don’t hate you, dummy. You just need to relax. I need you relaxed. So we’re going to get to know each other very well in a very short time to get that part out of the way, okay?” Ben nodded. “Great! I’m going to kiss you.”

His mouth dropped open and stayed there. She was pretty sure he stopped breathing again.

“And you are not going to faint! So breathe, in…out…in…”

His chest rose and fell, but now she swore he stopped blinking.

Rey scratched her head. They had to get this over with. “If you don’t want me to kiss you, you can stop me at any time, okay? In fact, anything I do to you, you can stop me and I won’t be upset, got it?”

A slight nod, a squeak. Good enough. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his open mouth. He inhaled and made a long keening sound, and she really hoped he wouldn’t faint again. This nice little introductory kiss would be quick and simple, done and done. Only…

She didn’t want it to be done so fast.

Rey deepened her kiss to his emphatic moan, his mouth so soft and fulfilling. She sunk her hand into his hair and pulled him closer, savoring the silken waves that soothed her soul. His hand rose and landed on her back, so cautious and unsure.

Damn, what was he doing to her? She never reacted like this with anyone else. It was pure heaven, warming and brightening her dark soul, casting away the hell she knew, telling her that there was something beautiful in this galaxy, lots of it, and maybe she hadn’t been seeing it, not until he woke her with just this sweet kiss.

She finally parted from him, deeply unsure about herself and how she was feeling. She didn’t like to lose control, and her feelings were betraying her. His chest rose and fell with his deep, sucking breaths, lips pink and fluffed from their kiss, eyelids low and hazy.

Her heart skipped.

Holy shit he was adorable. Who was this? Who was this amazing person she’d been denied until now? Where was this beautiful creature all this time, eyes and hair so dark but infused with such light?

“There,” she said and ran her hand to his neck. His pulse pounded against her fingers. “How’s that?”

A tiny cry followed by a nod. No, not enough. She sighed. “Looks like we’ll have to take this a little further. Feel free to stop me at any time.”

Rey grasped his hand, opened his fingers, and pressed his palm against her left breast. Ben sucked in an audible breath before panting.

He better not faint. He just better not fucking faint or she would lose her friggin mind.

“How’s that?” she asked. His mouth only opened a bit wider, eyes flicking from her face to his hand. Well, since they’d come this far, might as well keep going, at least until he calmed down once and for all. She planted her hand on his chest and slid her way across his impressively hard pecs while his eyes followed her every movement. She pulled up his black shirt and coursed her hand over the soft skin of his stomach.

“Oh wow,” he said as her hand went lower and lower. “Oh wow—oh wow.”

Over his bellybutton, fingers slipping through the line of black hairs leading down, over his belt—

“Oh my stars—”

Over the fabric and stitching of his pants.

“Oh wow—oh my—”

Down until she grasped his hardness, his…very…significant…

Oh wow, indeed.

She gave it a nice squeeze and a stroke that went farther than she ever imagined a man could go. He cried out with a broken moan, so she gave him yet another to match, then one more.

His body clenched, eyes snapping shut, a quick cry followed by a grunt. Beneath her hand she could feel it was over already.

Rey just remained in place, not sure of what to think.

“Oh man,” he groaned and pulled his shirt up to cover his head.

Rey had to suppress the giggle that wanted to slip out of her. She’d never met anyone so excited before, and she rode with pirates in wild space. She put her hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay.”

“No…”

“Ben, it’s fine—”

“I am so fucking mortified.”

“You don’t need to be—”

“Please shoot me.”

She tugged at his shirt. “Would you come out from under there—”

“No!” He held tight to the shirt over his face. “I’m never coming out!”

Rey sighed and nestled in next to him. She put her hand to his cheek outside of the fabric. “Ben, it’s okay, really. I’m flattered that I excite you so much. I like that I can make you feel so good.”

“…Really? Or are you just saying that?”

It was ridiculous to talk to a face-shaped shirt. “I promise. Listen…” She finally tugged the shirt down, revealing midnight eyes and an upturned brow, crumpled mouth of self-disgust. “I wanted to make you feel good and relieve some of the tension between us, and I did that, right?” She got a half nod, his eyes so humiliated, face crimson. “And that’s good, we got that out of the way, so from now on any interaction we have can just be us without all that anxiety and fear getting in the way, right?”

He tilted his head away and put his palm to his forehead. “I still feel like a loser.”

“Don’t.” She kissed his cheek and gently coaxed his gaze back toward her. “You know I don’t hold anything back. If you did anything wrong, I’d be telling you, wouldn’t I?”

“I guess. I just never expected…so fast…”

She kissed his lips and already felt the tension leaving his body. “And next time won’t be so fast.”

He looked about, then raised his brow again. “You’re saying there will be a next time?”

She stroked his long face. “I like you a lot more than I wish I did. I don’t usually fall for anyone. I don’t know, something about you, something…so special. I don’t know what fools ignored you, but their loss is my gain.”

He finally smiled, so sweet and pure, so deliciously adorable.

Rey sat up. “Of course, don’t expect me to jump your bones the next available moment we have together. This was just an icebreaker. If you want any part of this body of mine, you have to work for it.” She stood and straightened her belts. “Those are the rules I play by, so I expect some effort on your part. But at least now I can approach you without you having a panic attack. Once I feel your dick, you have to calm down. That’s my rules.”

After a few moments he said, “Rey, thank you—”

She growled in frustration. “Don’t ever thank me for anything sexual! It’s degrading!”

“N-no, not that. I was just going to say…for understanding me, for…comforting me when I felt like—” He chuckled. “—a complete failure of a man. You were so kind.” He sat at the edge of the bunk. “I don’t get much kindness.”

Rey sighed. “Well you should. You deserve it.” She looked over at him. His head was hung lightly, floppy waves in his face, but his dark eyes were on her. Warm, relaxed. He was smiling. Not that anxious, terror-filled grin, but a sweet, comfortable smile.

Her heart fluttered. No one made her heart flutter. Ever. She found herself smiling without realizing she’d been doing it. With a breath, she turned to her equipment. “You should probably change. We’ll be landing before you know it.”

Ben let out a sharp breath and stood. “Yeah, good idea.” He grabbed a new set of clothing from the storage unit and held the bunched ball low on his stomach. “I wonder how fast I can make it to the bathroom before anyone sees.”

As he made his way down the corridor, she heard, “Out of my way!”

Rey chuckled and rested her head in her hand. What did she get herself into?

#

After a quick shower to erase his embarrassment, Ben shoved his clothes on as quickly as possible. They were nearing Ossus, and he had to erase the utter chaos going on inside his head, heart, and body before facing Luke.

But there was one thing he had to do before anything.

Having left his shoes off, he crept down the corridor to the cockpit. There, as usual, his father sat with Chewbacca by his side. Han took a sip from his never-ending cup of whiskey and chuckled at some joke shared between the two.

Ben stepped closer until he was just out of their line of sight and slowly inhaled.

“IN YOUR FACE!” he screamed at Han.

His father flailed in his seat, spilling whiskey all over his shirt. “Damnit to hell, Ben! What is wrong with you?”

Ben grinned, licking his lips. “Nothing for once.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually witnessed a guy play chess blindfolded and won. I'm still trying to figure out how that's possible, but I am a witness! I'm not entirely sure holo-chess can be played in this manner, but meh, you got to suspend a little disbelief for this story.
> 
> The next two chapters will be related (the chapter got WAYYY too big once it was done and I had to split it) so I'm going to post them simultaneously. Ben will confront Luke after a good chunk of years and...yeah, it will go about as well as expected...


	5. Luke Likes Lightsabers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, no, seriously, that's not how you fight with a lightsaber, oh boy...  
> When Ben asks Luke Skywalker for the lightsaber his uncle had confiscated eighteen years prior, the result is...as Ben as it can possibly get. But Rey gets tired of everyone mocking her space muffin and takes things a little farther than she planned.
> 
>   
>    
> 

_She loves me! Or maybe just likes me, but she likes me!_ Ben floated as he waited for his father to land the Falcon. _She kissed me! A real woman kissed me, and Dad was right, it was nice to have a warm, breathing body next to me for once._

Rey, standing beside him, glanced at him with a crooked brow.

_Look at her. She’s so damn cute. She kissed me. Kissed_ me _. She started it. She chose me, chose to kiss me, kissed my lips—it was the most heavenly thing I’ve ever felt. It was so sweet, her mouth so delicate and lovely and soft. And while she was kissing me, it was like I was high or something, dizzy, I don’t know, but it was the most intoxicating feeling I’ve ever had. Oh I’m in love with her, like, soft love, not hard love, like not marry her tomorrow love—but maybe. I mean, you know, if she asked me I’m not going to say no. Not like any other girl will ever ask me, or kiss me, and mom said she wanted grandchildren one day, so I’m just saying if she asked me I’d totally do it, but unless that happens, then I am in mostly-love, I guess? I don’t even know._

Rey rocked on her heels beside him, taking in a breath and blowing it out of those sweet lips, puffing out her porcelain cheeks.

_And she touched me…touched me_ there _. I can’t believe I blew off my load in three strokes, but she’s just so beautiful and incredible and sexy and the way she touched me, I’ve never been touched before and Melanie doesn’t count, not like this, not in the way it matters. I mean, there was that one time—_

“Ben?”

He turned to her. “Yeah?”

“I hear everything you’re saying in my head.”

Ben felt nauseous. “No you don’t.”

_Do you hear me right now, Ben?_

His entire digestive system went lax. _Yes. Do you hear me?_

_Yeah, I do._

_Were you able to do that all this time?!_

_No, just started now._

_So you heard…_ Ben didn’t wait for her response. He dashed out of the room.

Ben hid in the bathroom, running cold water over his face. After drying, he leapt a mile when he saw Rey standing in the doorway.

“Still terrified of me?”

Ben sighed. “I just startle easily.”

“I can tell. Look, I didn’t mean to listen in. I wasn’t sure what was happening. It was faint at first, but it grew stronger, and then when I realized where your head was going—”

“So now I can never have a private thought ever?” He hung his head in his hand. “Why is this happening?”

“Our bond. The dyad bond, it must have grown stronger because we, I don’t know, kissed? Shared an intimate moment? I’m not sure I understand it either.” She paused. “Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?”

She smiled. “Ah, so it is controllable. I think you were just so excited by your…feelings you were pushing it out through the Force. So you _can_ have your private thoughts, just, perhaps keep them a little less exuberant.”

He closed his eyes. _So I can talk to you like this whenever I want?_

_Apparently._

He grinned, then it dropped. _I can’t believe you heard all that. Don’t—I mean, try not—I mean—I didn’t—I don’t—_

_Relax, it’s fine. I’ve…_ She smiled. _…come to expect it from you. I don’t look down on you for it._

Ben folded his hands. _Why are you so nice to me? No one’s ever been this nice to me._

Rey shrugged. _They don’t see your light like I do. They don’t know how to see all that brightness you have, like those pretty rocks you showed me. They don’t know what a treasure it is, what they’ve been missing._

Ben dropped his jaw and almost felt like crying. _By the Force I’m in love with her—SHIT! Did you hear that?_

Rey chuckled and left the bathroom.

Ben exhaled. “I’m so doomed.”

#

As Ben stepped down the ramp of the Falcon, he took in the sizable building ahead of him. It was different than he last remembered, perhaps designed with more safety improvements than its predecessor.

Seriously, his chemistry set shouldn’t have done _that_ much damage, not to a building designed with correct safety codes. In fact, he studied the Galactic Architectural Safety Code shortly after the incident and was pretty sure a few missteps had occurred in the original Temple’s construction.

He had to admit, even though that incredibly wonderful experience with Rey turned into the most mortifying moment of his life, he felt a little better. His anxiety dropped, especially around her. Unfortunately, his infatuation spiked much higher.

Her heavenly kisses, her expert touch.

He could already feel himself hopping the excitement train and needed to get his head out of the gutter, especially since the man who tried to kill him was heading toward them.

Ben sighed. He hadn’t spoken to his uncle in years.

Also, it was way too sunny. He slipped on his sunglasses, donned his wide black hat, and pulled a cylinder from his belt. With a click, his parasol snapped open, providing a relaxing respite from the angry orb above.

Finn looked him up and down. “It’s not raining.”

Ben nodded. “Oh I know; this is for the sun.”

His friend was back to making that crackling noise beneath his hand. Rey backhanded Finn in the stomach and he quieted.

“Damnit Ben!” Han yanked the parasol out of his hands and whacked him with it over and over. “Do you have to be an embarrassment everywhere we go?!”

Ben fought to gain control of the parasol. “The hat doesn’t help my forearms!”

Han threw the parasol on the ground. “There is no helping you!”

While Ben tried to restore the full spread of his sun-blocker, he heard Luke’s grating voice. “Oh for the love of the Force, he’s still walking in daylight with an umbrella?”

“It’s a parasol!” Ben growled between clenched teeth.

Rey tapped his arm. “Come. There are trees over here, you can stand under them so you don’t have to use that or the hat.”

Ben felt his stomach tightening. “I’m embarrassing you, too?”

“No, I don’t care about that. I just prefer to have hands free at all times, in case I need to draw a weapon. Good habit to get into, you should consider it. Besides, aren’t you warm? You wear that long-sleeved shirt everywhere.”

Ben sighed. “A little. Alright.” He stopped beneath a full canopy, put away his parasol and hat, and waited for Luke to come to them.

“Master Luke!” C3PO said. “It is so good to see you.”

“Threepio,” Luke said, patting the droid. “Always good to see you, old friend.”

“Luke!” Han said, his arms out.

The grizzled Jedi Master hugged his old friend. “Han, old buddy. Been too long.” Luke left him and held his arms out for the big guy. “Chewy?” After another hug, his uncle’s blue eyes roved Ben from head to toe. “Ben.”

Ben curled his upper lip in disgust. “Uncle Luke.”

Luke rolled his eyes and turned to the other two. “And who do we have here?”

Finn stuck his hand out. “I’m Finn, and let me just say it’s an honor to meet you. You’re a legend.”

Luke huffed and shook his hand. “The legends are far more overblown than the reality, trust me.”

“Still it—I’m just honored.”

“Well thank you. I can feel the Force flow in you, Finn. Curious, who was your teacher? Not too many Jedi out there nowadays.”

“Oh, that would be Rey here.” Finn motioned toward her.

“Rey,” Luke said. He stood in a friendly manner but Ben could already tell he was feeling Rey out on all kinds of levels. “Not a bad flow in you either.”

_Not a bad flow?_ Ben thought Luke had gone senile. _Even I feel it flooding out of her, and I’m pathetic in that department._

_I’m holding back,_ came the response. _I don’t like anyone stepping past my boundaries without my permission, and he hasn’t earned it yet._

_Crap, you heard me again?_

_You just haven’t learned much control yet, and I’ve done it for years. Relax, I need to concentrate on keeping him out._

“Yes,” Rey said, shaking his hand. She looked him straight in the eye, no gushing, no hint she felt anything toward him. In fact, she looked at him like an equal, no reverence at all. “I hold my own.”

“You must have had an excellent teacher.”

“I’m mostly self-taught.”

Luke’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly. “That’s unusual to reach that level without a teacher.”

“Not everyone is so fortunate. Sometimes all we have to rely on is ourselves.”

Luke nodded and still seemed unsure of her. He smiled. “Well, if either of you would like to expand your training, there’s always room here at the Temple.”

Finn gleamed. “Wow, it would be an honor, you know, once we are done with our mission.” Rey said nothing.

Luke inhaled and put his hands on his hips. “Speaking of missions, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit? All Han said was that Ben needed something from me, felt it was best I hear it from him myself.” Luke’s eyes turned icy as they turned to Ben. “Well?”

Ben crossed his arms, unable to muster the guts to ask for what he needed.

Rey nudged him with her elbow. _Go on._

_Rey…I can’t, I feel stupid._

_Just do it. We don’t have time to waste._

Ben sighed. “Can I please have my lightsaber?”

Luke stared at him. “No.”

Ben threw his arms up. “You see?”

Rey didn’t move. _Don’t ask him. Tell him._

_What? I can’t do that! He’ll kill me!_

_He won’t touch you while I stand here. Tell him what you want and do not waver._

Ben was about to run back onto the ship before he vomited from his nerves dancing. He forced himself to straighten. “What I mean is I need my lightsaber. I need you to give it to me.”

Luke remained unmoved. “And I said no.”

Ben slunk in exasperation and flailed his arms. “Come on! I need it!”

“Like I told you eighteen years ago, you haven’t earned it.”

“But I really need it this time. The entire galaxy is at stake!”

Luke smiled. “And what good is giving you a lightsaber going to do for the galaxy? If anything that would make it worse.”

Han huffed. “Tell me about it. More likely to stab himself than anyone else.”

Luke turned to his old friend. “I mean really, he couldn’t even handle a practice cane, and every time he got hit he’d cry.”

“Well nothing’s changed there. He stubs his toe and cries.”

“And I bet Leia’s right there kissing his boo-boos.”

“Ugh, don’t you know it—”

“Shut up!” Ben said. “I do not cry when I stub my toe!”

Han put his hands on his hips. “What was that last week?”

“I got something in my eye when I stubbed my toe!”

“Yeah! Giant crybaby tears!”

“Shut up!”

Luke shook his head and laughed. “Some things never change—”

“Did you not hear him?” Rey stood with bite in her eyes. “The galaxy is in danger and he needs his lightsaber.”

Luke straightened and became unreadable. “In danger from what exactly?”

The corner of Rey’s mouth turned up. “Funny, for a great Jedi Master such as yourself, I’d think you would have felt it by now.”

A faint shadow crossed over Luke’s face. Ben almost told Rey she shouldn’t be so bold, but that would be a waste of breath and a chance to get kicked in the face.

Luke tipped his head up. “Well why don’t you fill me in, and I’ll decide what I should and should not have felt.”

“Palpatine has returned and has amassed a fleet of planet destroying ships that will deploy soon unless we stop him.”

Luke regarded her, still unreadable but discomfort had risen in him. “Assuming this is true, what good is giving Ben his lightsaber going to do?”

“He and I are a dyad in the Force. We are the only ones who can go up against Palpatine and destroy him for good, and I need him at full capacity, lightsaber and all.”

Luke pointed at Ben. “ _Him?!_ You want to pit that against Palpatine?!”

“Did you just call him _that_?”

“Listen Rey, I have faced Palpatine. I have personally looked right into his eyes. Assuming he even survived after what my father did to him, there is no way Ben could _ever_ muster the ability to go up against that.”

“He didn’t survive the fall, but he did transfer his essence into a cloned body, a backup if you will. You’re not the only one who’s seen his eyes, _Master._ ”

Ben wasn’t sure what was going on, but he sure hoped the two of them wouldn’t end up in a fight. Things were getting ugly. “C-can I just say, in my defense, okay, maybe I screwed up a lot when I was twelve, but come on! I’m thirty now. I think I can handle my lightsaber.”

“Oh Ben,” Han said, “you cut yourself with a spoon last month!”

“They should never make spoons that sharp!”

“That’s just it—IT WASN’T!”

“Oh how do you know?!” Ben whipped off his sunglasses and pressed his fingers to his eyelids. “Look, forget it, just please, Uncle Luke. We don’t have a lot of time. Can I please just have it so we can go and you can all stop reminiscing about how pathetic I am?”

Luke sighed. “I already told you, no.”

Ben growled and clenched his fists. “It’s not my fault you kicked me out of the Temple! You didn’t even give me a chance to earn it back!”

“I kicked you out because you blew up the Temple!”

“It was an accident! You scared me!”

“You’re scared of everything!”

“That’s not true!”

Han huffed. “Oh it’s so true. Hey Chewy, remember three days ago when there was a snail in the garden?”

Chewbacca gurgled about a bird that made a nest outside the bathroom window, causing Ben to be unable to shower for a week.

“Or how about when he watched that documentary about _Sorbish_ creatures and thought every shadow was an alien invasion? He was literally afraid of his own shadow then.”

Ben roared and threw his hands up. “You guys are such jerks! Those were extraordinary circumstances—to be fair—in my defense—I’M NOT AFRAID OF EVERYTHING!”

Luke flicked his finger. A branch shook above Ben and twenty little green worms fell down around him, dangling from threads.

“GAHHHH!” Ben batted at himself and ran from beneath the tree into direct sunlight. “ACK! I can’t SEE! GET’EM OFF! HELP! I CAN’T SEE THEM!”

Luke, Han, and Chewbacca laughed their heads off. Finn looked like he would explode from trying to hold his in. Rey just stood glaring at the four men.

“REY!” Ben screamed and rushed at her. He flopped his head down toward her once again. “PLEASE! I feel them! I know they got in there this time!”

She sighed. “Alright, hold still.” He could feel her fingers sorting through his hair, and honestly, that gesture alone was soothing. Just like last time, her fingers slid like magic over his scalp and through his strands.

“Oh jeez,” Luke said, “she’s actually picking them out? She’s worse than Leia with him!”

Ben looked up just enough to see Rey, her eyes on fire, turn toward Luke. He wasn’t sure, but he swore he heard a growl deep in her chest. But she turned back to him after her fingers tugged through one of his locks.

“Alright Ben, I got it out.”

“Ew!” Ben vigorously rubbed at his scalp.

“Ben hold still. I want you to look at it.”

“NO!” He covered his face. “Nope nope nope, I can’t.”

“Ben, look at me.”

He hated when she said that, because he couldn’t disobey her. But when he turned his eyes up, she had that creepy thing on her hand. He clamped his eyes shut again. “Rey please…”

“Ben, listen to me. This is just a caterpillar. It’s a baby, nothing more than a baby that eats leaves. It won’t hurt you.”

Something about the way she said it made him open his eyes again. The green critter bunched itself up and stretched out along her skin.

“It’s just a baby moth—”

“ARGH! Moths are creepy as hell!”

“Ben, they are just like butterflies. Are butterflies so bad?”

“Not really…but they’re pretty. Moths are blech.”

“Ben…” She touched his cheek, and whenever she touched him, his entire soul just warmed and calmed. “…moths are just butterflies of the darkness. Remember what you said when you gave me that rock? That we can’t always see the true light of something unless we see it in the right circumstances? This is no different than you or me. We’re not what everyone sees on the surface.” She moved the caterpillar forward. “And neither is this.”

Ben swallowed. He still felt creeped out, but not nearly as much. She made a lot of sense. “I…guess you’re right.” He smiled. “I mean, logically, it’s silly for me to be scared of such a tiny thing. Maybe I haven’t given them a fair chance.”

“And I bet you know what it’s like to not be given a fair chance, to be judged solely on outer display.”

He sighed. “Too much.”

Rey lifted her hand to let the caterpillar back onto the tree. It scooted its bright green body onto a leaf, and Ben almost…almost thought it looked kind of cute. But Rey was _far_ cuter. “Rey, thank you. I think you’re the only one that gets me.”

“That’s not true,” Han said, “your mother babies you, too.”

Ben turned and snarled at his father. “Can you ever stay out of it?!”

Rey sighed and put her hands on her belted hips. “If you’re all done humiliating Ben, he needs his lightsaber. So Luke, go get it so we can get back to our mission.”

Luke crossed his arms. “Go get it?”

Han shook his head. “She is a pistol.”

“Lot like Leia.”

“Oh yeah.”

“Maybe I wasn’t clear,” Rey said. “Whether you believe me or not, whether you feel it or not, and I suspect he’s keeping himself pretty locked down so you _can’t_ feel him, Palpatine is going to unleash hell upon this galaxy unless we can stop him in time. We are wasting precious minutes while you degrade your nephew. He needs that saber, I will teach him everything he needs to know, and we need you to go get it now before I have to go in there and get it myself.”

Han threw his hands up. “Or you could try being polite for once!”

“Polite is for the weak. Besides, Ben tried being polite and it only got him humiliated. Clearly we need to take things up a notch.”

The stare-down that followed was one for the ages. No one moved. Finn shifted backwards to stay as far out of it as possible. Chewbacca subtly readied himself in case things got ugly. Han vaguely seemed as if he would intervene if necessary but really wanted a drink. And Luke bore into Rey who did the same in return.

All Ben knew was that Rey was on his side. She didn’t laugh at him or poke fun at him. She didn’t join in when they humiliated him. She stood by him, picked icky things out of his hair, and helped him try to get past his phobias.

She cared about him and sided with him. Outside of his mom, no one had ever done that for him.

He didn’t care how short of a time they’d known each other. He knew then that he loved her. And he would do anything for her.

Luke nodded. “Know what? I’m going to get his saber.”

Ben gasped. “What?”

“Yes, Ben. I’m going to get your lightsaber, and then I will show your little friend here why you are incapable of handling such a powerful weapon.”

“Or he might surprise you,” Rey said through her teeth.

Luke smiled. “Maybe. I’ll be right back.”

While Luke was gone, Rey and Han argued over how she spoke to him, Finn tried to keep the peace between the two, and Chewbacca looked like he was ready to kill something and eat it rather than deal with the banter.

Ben? He just stood there with butterflies in his stomach (moth cousins, ew!) How was Luke planning to show Rey, exactly?

The Jedi Master returned and flung Ben’s lightsaber at him. His attempt to grab it just made it spin in the air, bounce off his wrist, and fall to the ground. He could hear the collective sighs around him as he reached to pick it up.

“Stand back,” Luke said, waving everyone away. “I guarantee that thing will go flying before this is over, and I don’t need anyone getting their head cut off.”

Ben—his stomach so tight he could puke, heart racing—gripped his old saber. It felt much better in his hands, now that he had finally grown into the hilt that used to be so clunky and thick. He hit the switch and let out a cry as the blue light hummed into existence.

“Scared of his own lightsaber,” Han muttered.

Ben glared briefly before readying his weapon. Luke opened his robe, let his lightsaber snap into his outstretched hand, and ignited. “Okay, Ben, show them what you got. Come at me.”

Ben inched closer, his saber held up like a bat. “Okay…okay—”

“You’re singeing your hair.”

“ACK!” Ben shifted the saber and watched as a (thankfully thin) lock of hair floated to the ground. _Damn, this is going well already._

Once more he stepped forward, nice, tiny, calculated steps. Luke stomped his foot, and Ben leapt back farther than where he started. “Stop that! That’s not funny.”

Luke grinned to the audience and calmed once again. He waved for Ben to try again.

Ben slid each step, creeping closer, waving his saber. Just when he got in range to strike, Luke swung out at him. He stumbled back and clenched his teeth. “Come on! You said for me to come at you!”

“Yeah? And?”

“So I have to strike first! That’s not fair, I wasn’t ready for you to do that.”

“Oh, I’m so deeply sorry. Come again, and I promise I won’t strike first.”

Ben could feel everyone’s watching eyes. Finn, his first and only friend, was probably trying not to laugh. He could hear Uncle Chewy snickering. His father was usually cringing around Ben, so that was nothing new. And Rey? Well, she was already seeing how inept he was. If this didn’t drive her away, nothing would.

At least C3PO looked concerned for his welfare. He could always rely on a droid. He wished he had brought Melanie out but didn’t need to hear chants of, “Sexbot.”

Ben raised his lightsaber high, stepped in, and swung down. Luke blocked, slamming into his saber, causing pain to shoot up Ben’s arm. “Uncle Luke, that’s too hard! My wrists are delicate, and I need my hands for my inventions.”

“My humblest apologies.” He really didn’t sound like he was apologizing at all.

Han muttered, “Where did I go wrong?”

Ben swung at Luke again just to have the strike blocked before it went anywhere, the green blade drawing too close to his skin. “Damnit Uncle Luke! You almost burned me! Would you stop getting so close?”

Luke gave Rey the most blatant “I told you so” look ever bestowed upon another. For the first time ever, fire poured through Ben’s veins. He was tired of being humiliated in front of her. With a roar, he charged in, swinging as hard as he could. Luke dodged most, parried a few, then blocked hard on the last three. Ben’s saber flew out of his hand and onto the ground.

“I told you not to hit so hard!” Ben cried as he bent for his weapon. “I’m out of practice.”

“No you’re not. You’re as good as you were last time we did this.”

Ben bared his teeth. “Shut up!” He swung with everything he had in him, sure he could finally knock the damn saber out of Luke’s hands for once, shut him up, shut them all up. But all he did was tire his arms out. Luke barely looked like he was trying.

Luke shrugged. “Well, at least you had some energy behind that. Let’s see how well you block.”

“Wait, don’t—” Green flew at him, and he darted to the right. “Wait!” He barely dodged the next one that swept too close to the front of his shirt. “Come on! I wasn’t ready!”

Luke stopped. “Okay, get ready.”

Ben stood, breathing, gripping his lightsaber, twisting it in his hands.

Luke sighed. “Ready?”

“Um, yeah—wait!” He dried his palms off on his pants and gripped the saber again. “Okay…okay now.” Green whipped at him again, and Ben tried to bat it away. “Wait—don’t—come on—wait I’m not—COME ON! You’re being too rough!”

“I’m being too rough? You want to see rough?”

“…No.”

Luke stared at him, and Ben did not like what he felt. Luke dashed in, lightsaber coursing through the air at such a blinding speed it left trails in Ben’s eyes. Ben leapt back two steps, fell, but righted himself just in time to run from the oncoming barrage. No matter where he went, Luke flew after him, maybe intent on killing him for sure this time.

It was just like the last time they saw each other.

This was too much. Ben turned off his lightsaber and flung it at Luke before ducking behind a tree. Gasping for air, he tipped his head back against the bark, feeling like the biggest failure the galaxy had ever known.

Luke’s face popped up beside him, saber still lit. “Boo.”

Ben raced out from behind that tree, tried to get behind the one with all the creepy caterpillars, but Luke just kept following him. “Quit it! I’m unarmed! Would you stop?!”

But Luke didn’t stop. Maybe he’d never stop. Maybe this was the final revenge for blowing up the temple.

Wait, Jedis didn’t believe in revenge, right?

Whatever, Luke was still coming. Ben didn’t know what to do with himself. He tried to duck behind Chewbacca, a nice, sizable obstacle, but his hairy uncle just threw him back into the battle.

Ben tossed his arms around Han. “Dad! Make him stop!”

Han shoved him away. “I’m too busy hiding in shame!”

So his father wouldn’t save him. C3PO was already running back to the ship. Finn couldn’t stop laughing and apologizing.

He had only one port in the storm.

Ben ran behind Rey, gripping her arms as he ducked behind her back. “Hide me. Please. He won’t come after me if I’m with you.”

On that he was at least right. Luke deactivated his saber and hooked it next to Ben’s recovered weapon. Well, it was official. He was never getting that sucker back.

Han threw his hands up. “For all fuck’s sake, Ben! You hide behind a girl half your size?”

Ben popped up over Rey’s shoulder with his teeth clenched. “Well Uncle Chewy wouldn’t help me, and neither did you!”

Luke sighed and crossed his arms. “You see? This is what I’ve been trying to tell you. He’s incapable of using it, and until he is, it’s going to remain here for everyone’s safety.”

Rey huffed. “And why is it he’s incapable of using it? Huh? Maybe because you suppressed his powers since he was a child?”

Luke froze, the group going silent.

Ben couldn’t have heard that right. He straightened, towering over Rey. “Wait, what?”

She turned to face him, her arms crossed. “They never told you, did they?”

“Rey!” Luke said, his eyes sharp and full of warning. “That’s enough. That’s none of your business.”

“Oh? Well it certainly seems it’s his business. Maybe you ought to tell him.”

Ben trembled right down to his bones. “What…what’s going on?”

Luke pointed at Rey. “You should have never spoken about that—”

Rey shrugged. “The truth? Don’t you think at thirty he’s old enough to know what you did to him? That makes him so incapable? I mean really, you admonish him for not being good enough when it was you who suppressed his powers—”

Ben’s entire being flared. “YOU DID WHAT?!”

Luke sighed, but it was Han who answered. “Ben, it wasn’t his fault. He just did what we asked him to.”

Ben backed up, feeling so distrustful of his family for the first time ever, feeling like his entire life had been a lie. “What…did you ask him to do? I want to hear it. All of it.”

Han held his hand out. “You don’t understand. You don’t realize what you were like at that age. Even at just five years old, your powers were too strong.”

“You were filled with darkness,” Luke said. “That is the truth. Your powers were off the charts but filled with darkness. Your mother and I kept having visions of your future, of what you would become, the hell you would reap upon this galaxy. You would have been a monster, just like your grandfather.”

Ben couldn’t speak. His mouth only quivered. He had never felt so betrayed in his life.

“We didn’t want that for you, Ben. Your parents love you, I love you. None of us wanted to see you turn against us, against everything we stood for. We didn’t want the darkness to put out the light inside of you for good. I hated doing what I had to do, but if I hadn’t…Ben, you would have been lost to us by now, and all the devastation you would have caused would have been unrecoverable.” Luke let out a harsh breath. “You don’t know what we saw.”

Ben swallowed. He remembered that dream where he felt like he had indeed been a monster.

Luke continued. “I found an old rite to block use of your powers to a trickle of what it should be. But it’s not permanent, it never was. As you trained, as you learned control, it would grow. We always said that.”

Ben glared at him. “But you said it as if I just didn’t have enough power to begin with. You never told me what you did to me. Even as an adult, even when I had a RIGHT to know, you kept this from me! And you!” He pointed to his father. “You and mom? You all knew? And you just decided to keep this lie to yourselves all this time?”

Han sighed. “Ben—”

“NO! I spent my whole life feeling like a failure! The LEAST you could have done was told me! I’ve…been beating myself up all my life for being so inept with the Force, for being the worst Jedi imaginable, and it was all your fault!”

“What was better? All of us dead? Star systems obliterated? You, lost to the Dark Side? Huh?! Tell me that was better!”

Ben felt the tears rise and hated himself for being unable to control his emotions. “I don’t know,” he whispered, “but I had a right to know.” He brushed away his tears and turned to Luke. “Well the galaxy is about to be under attack, so you better release whatever you did before Palpatine kills us all. Maybe I can finally catch up before that happens.”

Luke sighed. “It doesn’t work that way, Ben.”

“The hell do you mean?”

“I can’t just take it off. That’s not how it works. That’s not my rules, that was how the rite was designed. The only one who can break it is you, by doing _exactly_ what I’ve been telling you all your life. Train properly, train hard, yes, it will be really difficult when it used to come so easy, but do it, learn control, and it will come. That is how it was always meant to work, only you gave up too quickly—”

“You kicked me out of the Temple and tried to kill me!”

“I was angry at you for blowing up the damn Temple!”

“Well I wouldn’t have blown up the Temple if you didn’t scare me!”

“And if you were practicing LIKE I TOLD YOU, you wouldn’t have been screwing around with your chemistry kit!”

“And if I had any hope of EVER being a Jedi, I wouldn’t have been screwing around! But I didn’t, alright? I lost every bit of hope I’d ever be anything! And what about you? Huh? You could have asked me to come back. You could have kept at me with training. But no, you cut off my powers and then have the nerve to cut off my training. FUCK!” He crouched and rubbed his forehead with his hand.

Luke sighed. “Ben, you’re right. I got angry, fed up, honestly, maybe I gave up on you too. And knowing what I knew, I shouldn’t have. But it’s not the end of it all. You still can access your powers. You just have to train and get stronger. You are the only one who can break through it.”

Ben shook his head. “We don’t have time.” He sniffled and looked up at Rey. “I’m sorry, Rey. You came to me…needing me, needing my power to help you. And I’m just this. I’m nothing…and I’ll never be more than nothing. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare say that.” Her voice was so sharp it forced him to look up. The way she stood there, so powerful like a goddess, he wondered if he could ever deserve her. “Ben, none of this is your fault. And you are so much more than your powers. You are brilliant and loving and kind and sweet, you can do so much and you have so much to offer the galaxy. You are _not_ nothing. Not to me.”

Ben slowly stood, his heart bursting as he fell so much deeper in love with her. She made him feel so good, so perfect. He didn’t want to be anything if not with her.

Luke inhaled and pressed his lips together. “I’m sorry, kid. I didn’t want you finding out this way, but you did. And I’m sorry I didn’t try harder with you. But now you know the truth and you know what you have to do. Your lightsaber will be here waiting for you. When you’re ready to wield it, it will go to your hand.” He turned toward the Temple.

“We are not leaving without that lightsaber,” Rey spat between her teeth.

Luke sighed. “You don’t get to make that decision.”

She reached out her hand. “Actually, I do.”

The lightsaber flew off Luke’s belt, but he just as soon caught it on the Force himself. “Careful, young lady. This is a path you do not want to go down.”

Rey’s eyes grew in intensity, the saber floating closer to her. Luke turned and drew back on it. Despite the Jedi Master’s strength, it was not returning to him.

He narrowed his eyes. “You’ve been holding out on me. Hiding yourself in the shadows, just like _he_ does.”

Rey grinned slightly. “So you believe me now, about Palpatine.”

“Rey, you don’t want to do this. End this now before you wind up in more trouble than you can handle.”

Rey drew harder on the lightsaber. “Oh I handle myself fine. Now let it go.”

“I think one more lightsaber in your possession would be a dangerous thing, now that I’m seeing far more of you and your powers. That’s right, Rey, you can’t use all your strength against me and hide yourself at the same time. So what’s it going to be? Show me the truth and get the lightsaber, or let go and keep your secrets?”

Ben had no idea what Luke was talking about. What secrets could Rey possibly have? They already knew she was a space pirate.

Rey dropped her hand, letting the lightsaber snap back to Luke, but it was only a moment before she drew her own weapon. Yellow light hummed to life atop a burgundy hilt, the likes of which Ben had never seen. She narrowed the distance between herself and Luke in split seconds before striking.

Luke stowed Ben’s saber on his belt and drew his own green one, meeting Rey’s strike in a quick parry. “Interesting color. Not quite Dark Side but definitely not Light.”

Rey roared after him, fighting like Ben had never seen before. It was raw, vicious, and wild, using quick, wide steps. Her feet moved like gravity didn’t exist, and she struck with such fury Ben didn’t know whether to run for his life or get aroused.

He had never seen her like this, or even sense it was possible. Yes she was a space pirate, but this…he couldn’t describe this if he tried.

“REY!” Finn cried, keeping his lightsaber at the ready. “Come on! Don’t do this! We can work it out!”

Han jogged over to him. “What is going on with her? She’s more nuts than before.”

“Her anger is fueling her power. She gets lost in it sometimes. I just hope…”

“Hope what?”

“That’s it,” Luke said, remaining entirely too calm during the battle for someone being attacked by what amounted to a vicious animal, “show me who you really are in there.”

Rey thrust out her hand and screamed. Lightning blasted forth at Luke, who caught it on his saber.

Ben’s heart stopped. Force-lightning only meant one thing…

“I knew it,” Luke said, holding her power at bay. “I could sense it but you hide it so well. You are a lot stronger than I thought, impressive for someone who is self-taught, if that wasn’t a lie. Maybe you just learned from Palpatine himself, considering you’re his descendant!”

“WHAT?!” Ben cried out, the world falling out from beneath him. No, that couldn’t be true. She was so kind and good to him. Her smile was so tender and angelic. And she cared for him, really cared for him. She wasn’t the epitome of evil. She couldn’t be! He knew her.

His shout threw her off. She turned toward him, and his soul just curled up and withered inside of him. Her eyes were yellow-orange, glowing with Dark Side fury. But she didn’t look at him with evil in her soul. She looked hurt, as if it pained her to have hurt him.

_Ben…I’m sorry._

Then it was true. No…oh no…not her. Please not her! He loved her…

Luke used the distraction to shove off her power, blasting her backwards. She fell and rolled but was back up on her feet in no time. Panting though, that took something out of her.

Luke sighed and his eyes took on a sadness that made Ben’s heart race. “I’m sorry for this.”

No, Ben mouthed, not even knowing what it was Luke would do.

His uncle charged in with blinding speed and slammed at Rey’s lightsaber. She blocked and parried but was losing ground fast.

“REY!” Finn cried and rushed to her aid.

Luke flung him back toward Han and Chewbacca. “I’m sorry, kid, take no offense, but you have to stay out of this. And I’m sorry for you to find out you’ve been trained by a Sith descendant.”

“Please! She’s not like that! You don’t know her!”

“I know what her kind reaps on this galaxy, and I have to put a stop to it.”

Ben swallowed, and when he spoke, his voice could barely muster volume. “What are you saying? Uncle Luke? What are you doing?!”

Rey fell to her knees, still blocking Luke’s strikes.

“Uncle Luke!” Ben found his volume. “What are you doing?!”

Rey struggled against the slamming green saber.

“Uncle Luke! Stop! She’s not a Sith! I know her! You have to stop!”

“Ben,” Luke said, and Ben could see the sorrow in his eyes, “I’m so sorry.” He swung down hard and knocked the yellow saber out of Rey’s hand. He remained standing above her, heartbreak in his eyes but his saber still at the ready, waiting to strike.

She just looked up, bitter but defeated as she waited for the inevitable.

“Uncle Luke!” Ben cried. “Don’t! Please!”

The saber rose higher.

“NOOOO!” Ben thrust his hand out. Luke blasted backwards, far away from Rey. Ben ran over to stand in front of her and shoved his hand out once more. Silver spun through the air, and his lightsaber snapped into his hand. Bright blue humming to life, and he stood guard before his beloved.

Silence.

The adrenaline drained, and Ben could think clearly once again. Sort of. If thinking clearly meant he just used power he never knew he had to shove Luke a hundred yards away and draw his saber to his hand, well, that still seemed a bit too unreal. Still not sure of what just happened, he deactivated his saber and turned to look behind him. “Rey? Are you okay?”

Her eyes lost that glowing yellow-orange. They were back to their soft hazel. Her mouth trembled. “I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?” He knelt before her and cupped her cheek.

She nodded, her eyes rimming with tears. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I am. I’m sorry you had to find out like this.” She sucked in a sob.

Ben shook his head. “I don’t care about that. I only care about you.”

She broke down and wept into her hands. Ben wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head.

“I don’t deserve you,” she whispered.

“That’s not true. I’m a mess, remember? A disaster. If anything, I’m the one that doesn’t deserve you.” She laughed in her tears, and he kissed her head again. “Listen, I don’t care about any of that okay? We’ll…talk, we’ll work it out.”

“Ben, I’m the monster they were afraid you’d be.”

“That’s impossible.”

“It’s true.”

“It can’t be. I’ve already seen your heart. No monster could have a heart like yours.” She shook in his arms, and he breathed into her hair. “Listen, I’ll be right back, okay?”

She nodded. Ben stood and stormed toward Luke.

“Ben!” Han called. “What are you doing?”

Ben ignored him and continued.

“Ben! Whatever you’re thinking of doing…Ben please?”

Ben couldn’t stop now.

“Ben, you’re my son! Don’t go down this path! Don’t undo everything we did to stop this!”

Ben ignited his lightsaber. He slowed when he drew close to Luke. The man was just fluttering back into consciousness. Blue eyes met his, then flicked to Ben’s lightsaber.

Ben stood over his uncle, reading, assessing. He powered down his lightsaber and hooked it on his belt before diving to his knees. He picked his uncle up and held him. “Uncle Luke? Are you okay?”

Luke huffed with a slight grin. “Hell of a blast, kid.”

“I am _so_ sorry. I didn’t…I didn’t even know I could do that. I never meant to hurt you. I just wanted to stop you.”

Luke nodded. “I get it, kid. Guess when the right moment came, you were able to break past that suppression. You love her.”

Ben nodded, tears rimming his eyes. “Yeah.”

“She’s dangerous.”

“I know. And I love her anyway. She’s a good person. She has a good heart. Her powers…they don’t make her who she is. I’ve seen who she is, you have to trust me.”

Luke sighed. “Maybe you’re right. Ben, when we suppressed your powers, we got to see who you were beneath the clouding darkness. You were, and are, a sweet, brilliant person, also with a very good heart. I guess it’s not too hard to think maybe she’s the same way.”

“She is. Trust me, I feel it. And not just in my heart. I feel it through the Force. She’s my dyad. I know her in ways I can’t describe and can only feel. And I know once we all just…sit down and talk, we’ll learn the truth, and it won’t seem nearly as bad as it looked.”

Luke hesitated, then nodded. “Okay Ben. Okay.” He smiled. “I’m proud of you, kid. You finally got your powers to work. On me, but well, you know.”

Ben smiled, laughed, and hugged his uncle. “I’m so glad you’re okay. I thought…I really thought I hurt you.”

Luke hugged him back, strong and tight. “I’m fine kid. Just a few bumps and bruises, and a little concussion never killed anyone, right?”

Ben laughed and buried his face in Luke’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

Luke patted his back. “Forget about it, it’s over. Consider us even. I’m sorry I didn’t keep training you, you’re sorry for almost killing me, it’s all good.”

“Yeah, but what about the Temple?”

“Look, let’s just take what we can get here, huh?”

Ben chuckled and let him go, helping him to stand.

Han finally jogged over, Chewbacca in tow. “He still alive?”

Luke rolled his eyes. “Yeah I’m still alive. Thanks for taking so long to find out.”

“Hey, I’m not getting in a lightsaber battle between the two of you.” He nodded toward Rey. Finn was knelt beside her. “What do we do about her?”

Ben inhaled deep into his chest. “We sit down and talk about it like adults.”

Luke scoffed. “Adults? She started it!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inchworm incident totally happened to me when I was a kid. I was deathly afraid of them, and decided one day to go hiking despite having run from a few already. I pulled down a tree branch on a trail to get a better view then let it snap back into place. Twenty inchworms dropped all around me and, well, let's just say I understand Ben's reaction LOL!


	6. Darkness or the Light?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, your math may be poetic, but your heart is even more so.  
> Rey reveals the secrets of her lineage while Ben mulls over situation that brought out his powers. Then a gesture touches Rey to the depth of her hardened heart.
> 
>   
>    
> 

“I am the daughter of a failed clone.” Rey looked at no one as she spoke. The group gathered around her in the grass beneath the shady tree. Ben’s eyes kept flitting to the leaves, watching for rogue inchworms while he listened to her story. “Palpatine’s current cloned body didn’t work out well. By the time he used his DNA to create my father, he was already falling apart. The machines barely keep him alive.

“But the Sith cultists had gotten better with the cloning by then. Not good enough, though. My father was physically capable, unlike the first, but his flow of Force was too weak for Palpatine’s tastes. When he was about ten, Palpatine had given up on trying to make him into an appropriate vessel for his spirit. He’d ordered my father killed, but he escaped, managing to sneak onto a ship owned by one of the cultists. Shirac’s crew attacked the ship, and lo-and-behold, in the cargo bay was a boy strong enough to do some work. My father, naming himself Oren, decided that being a slave to a pirate ship was better than any alternative so far.

“Luckily for him, being able to use the Force was an asset for Shirac. My father worked his way up from slave to crew member and satisfied his captain many times over. Unfortunately for my father, he was plagued by Palpatine constantly in his head, feeding him thoughts, controlling his destiny as much as possible. Palpatine must have known his clones weren’t working, at least not good enough for what he needed. He tried another avenue.”

She turned to Ben. “He must have felt you, such a powerful flow of the Force, even as a baby. Skywalker blood, he couldn’t wait to sink into you. I don’t know what he fed into your head, but if it’s anything like I experience, I’m already sorry.”

Ben just sat breathing, lightly trembling. “I don’t remember much. It was so long ago. But sometimes…I can almost remember, almost feel it.”

Han nodded. “We told Luke about the voices, how Ben kept saying there was a man in his head telling him to do terrible things and that we didn’t love him. Leia was plagued with dreams and visions, and we learned Luke was having them too.”

Luke smoothed his hand over his face. “Kid, I hated what we did to you, but you have to know it was the only way we knew to keep you safe.”

Ben shrugged. “Yeah, I guess…what choice did you really have? Just wish I would have known. I have to undo a lot of self-hatred because of that.”

“You’re right. We thought we knew best, but even adults screw up. Hell, we do it a lot.”

On that, they all agreed.

Rey took in a breath. “Once you locked Ben down, Palpatine lost his potential vessel. He had to get creative. He started prompting my father, then maybe eighteen, to have children. Well, pirate women are not easily swayed. He was already dating my mother, but convincing her to have a child? Hmph, I can tell you that’s not high on the list of things a pirate woman feels like doing. But I guess he worked his magic. Unfortunately, he became ill not too long after I was conceived. My mother said he barely got to hold me before he was gone.”

Ben took her hand, and she gave him a brief smile of gratitude. “Palpatine was in my head from day one. He felt me on the Force, felt the strength of my flow, and he was going to bring me home, so to speak. What he didn’t count on was my mother or Shirac. My father had told her about the voices in his head, and she told me, ‘Rey, that’s your old grandfather, some piece of shit who can’t get his act together. Don’t mind those voices. You keep your own mind. Fuck that guy.’” Rey grinned. “She was a very colorful woman.”

After a shared laugh, she sighed. “But a pirate’s life is what it is. She died in a raid, and now all I had was Shirac. He took care of me, but I was never really his daughter. He treated me well, not saying that, but we knew where we stood. If I wanted to keep eating, I would lend him my powers. I had to be strong. The stronger I was, the greater the reward. I had to be tough to survive the crew, who feared Shirac but still tried to slip by his guard. I had to be strong to fight off whoever wanted a piece of me, to survive the raids and battles, and I had to kill. A lot. Some would say that’s what pushed me to the darkness, but I don’t know. I think it was always in me. I did whatever I had to do to survive. I wasn’t out for vengeance or power. But what flowed through me wasn’t all bubbles and light.

“When I was old enough, Palpatine turned it on full force. The voices were endless, visions of what I could become, what I could achieve, and what the results would be if I refused him. It was maddening, and I knew the only way it would stop is if I faced him.

“Palpatine told me everything, promised me everything, and had so many things for me to use on my path. But he couldn’t give me what I truly wanted. He didn’t know what I valued. He thought he knew me, but he didn’t. I’d seen too much death, and that’s all he offered. And honestly, I was disgusted by him and his methods. He needed to end. But I realized too quickly I could not defeat him on my own. That’s what led me to Ben.” She shrugged. “That’s it. So now you know. I am a Palpatine, but I don’t like it, I don’t want it, and if I could change it I would. The darkness flows in me stronger than my light.”

She looked at Luke. “No offense, but this whole Jedi thing dealing in absolutes, either you’re Dark or you’re Light, it’s bullshit. I didn’t choose the Dark Side. I don’t wallow in the Dark Side. I do what I have to do, no matter what I use. The end. I came at you in anger because I hated the way you treated Ben, and I knew you were impeding our mission. I didn’t come at you in hatred for my own satisfaction, but in divine anger that someone was hurting a person I care about, who is so gentle and loving, it hurts me to see him hurt. If that makes me part of the Dark Side, so be it. I don’t care.”

Luke asked, “Did you feel like you were in control? You acted like the Darkness was taking over. That’s what concerned me. And I’m sorry, but you are far more leaned toward the Dark Side than you realize.”

“No she isn’t,” Ben said.

“Ben, I see it—”

“Then you’re wrong! You see what your eyes want to see, but I feel her. We are linked through the Force.” He squeezed her hand. “She’s not evil. She’s not like Palpatine.”

Luke sighed. “I hope for everyone’s sake you’re right.”

“Wait,” Han said, “if you knew how to get to Exegol, why did you have to pop open Threepio’s head?”

Rey shook her head. “Exegol isn’t like a normal planet. It’s highly mechanized, similar to the Death Star.”

Ben gasped. “A mechanical planet? Wow, the amount of engineering that must have gone into that.” A dreamy smile spread across his lips. “Oh man, I can’t wait to see this place now. Think I can get the schematics when I’m there?”

Everyone stared at him in silence.

Han rolled his eyes. “Try not to blow a load in your pants over it, huh kid?” 

Ben sprung to his feet. “WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT?!”

More stares. More silence. Ben pressed his lips together and sat back down, looking at no one.

Rey cleared her throat, gave Ben a warning glance, and continued her story. “Anyway, regarding Exegol, it can change position, leave star systems, cut across the galaxy. That’s why no one can ever find it. You need a Wayfinder to home in on its signal. Palpatine led me to one, but it was eventually stolen from me. That’s why we needed the coordinates from C3PO, to get to the other Wayfinder on the remains of the Death Star.”

Chewbacca said something that made Han snicker. “I know, right? Someone steals something from a space pirate for a change.”

Rey sighed. “The circumstances were…it’s hard to explain. Palpatine has built a fleet but certainly needs an army to take over the galaxy. He calls it the Final Order, and its Supreme Leader is Kylo Ren. He wound up with my Wayfinder, and I’m not interested in explaining how.”

Ben tilted his head. “Kylo Ren. That’s a pretty cool sounding name.”

Han huffed. “If you took that name, we’d be calling you Crylo Ren.”

“Dad, shut up!”

“Careful Han,” Luke said, “you don’t want to upset Darth Prettiest over here.”

Rey snapped her pistol from its holster and aimed it at Luke. Finn carefully put his hands forward, trying to deescalate while Han rolled his eyes.

“Rey,” Finn said, “we’re all cool here, Luke’s just kidding around, right?”

Luke looked at the both of them with little amusement.

 _Hey,_ Ben sent to Rey, _it’s okay, really._

_The two of them can keep their snide remarks to themselves._

_Yeah, but they won’t. They’re old, you know? According to the Chandrilian Journal of Medicine, the brain deteriorates at a rate of five percent per decade when you get to around their age, so they’re already looking at a fifteen percent decrease in functioning. So you know, it’s not really their fault they’re jackasses._

Rey snorted into giggles and lowered her gun. Ben grinned beside her, glad he could make the trigger-happy space pirate laugh (and not at him.) Maybe this telepathy wasn’t such a bad thing.

Han shook his head. “Guess we missed something good.”

#

As the two suns of Ossus lowered toward the horizon, the group began its goodbyes to Luke.

“We really could use the help, Luke,” Finn said. “The Resistance needs all the help it can get.”

Luke sighed but smiled politely. “I can’t go with you. I can’t just abandon the Jedi Temple.”

“That’s too bad, but I get it. If you change your mind, the base is on Ajan Kloss.”

“And when this is over, my offer still stands if you want to train here.”

Finn shook his hand. “It would be an honor.”

Luke straightened as he regarded Rey. “It was…interesting meeting you.”

“Likewise,” was the short response.

Luke’s gaze grew in intensity. “Take care of Ben.”

“…I will.”

Ben eased when Rey finally turned around and headed back to the Falcon. Those two sentences seemed heavy with far more than words.

Luke waited until everyone was gone except Han and Ben. The seriousness in his eyes gave Ben a chill. He hadn’t looked this way since Ben burnt down the Temple. “The two of you need to seriously consider who is on your ship.”

Han rubbed a hand over his face. “Don’t remind me. I was just barely living with the space pirate thing, but a Sith Space Pirate Palpatine, that’s asking for a lot of leeway.”

Ben frowned. “What are you saying?”

“I think I was clear when I said Sith Space Pirate Palpatine. I don’t need our entire crew to wake up dead when she goes ballistic.”

“So what you don’t want her coming with us now?”

“Ben—”

“You said you’d take us where we needed to go!”

“That was before I knew she could shoot lightning!”

“She won’t hurt us!”

“You don’t know that!”

“Yeah I do!” Ben paused then chuckled. “You know, you’re always calling me a coward. Who’s the coward now?”

Luke’s mouth turned into a tiny o while Han put his hands on his hips. “What did you just call me, boy?”

Ben fought between the surge that made him want to stand up to his father and the pummeling anxiety that made him want to hide under a rock. “I…” He shut his eyes, stuck at an impasse. “Know what? If she can’t come, I’m not going. I’ll stay with her, and we’ll figure out how to get there on our own.”

“What, are you going to _build_ a ship?”

“If I have to! Where she goes, I go, and that’s the end of it!”

Luke sighed. “Ben, with everything you learned today about her, none of it concerns you in the least?”

“Everything in the universe concerns me.” Ben thought a moment. “Except this. Except her. And I don’t know why. There’s no logic to it. And yet I’m sure of it.”

“Ben, you need to consider whether your feelings on this are being manipulated in a direction that could endanger you all. Or…”

“Or what?”

“Your feelings about _her_ are blinding you to real danger.”

“What? No!” Ben sucked in a breath, thought it through. “Of course I like her. She’s beautiful, strong, and she…treats me like a human being.” His heart ached for just a moment before the soothing balm of her actions loved it back into a warm calm. “But it’s more, I’m telling you. I feel it, even stronger now that my powers opened up. She’s my dyad, and I just…I know where she stands.”

“Ben, I know about dyads, I read about dyads—”

“What, once? I read that book seven times. Would you like to hear it quoted from beginning to end? Page one, table of contents, introduction to Force dyads. Page five, history of Force dyads. Page fifteen, the source—”

Luke rolled his eyes. “You’re starting at the table of contents?!”

“That’s how well I memorized the book!” Ben tossed his hand up. “You’re just jealous because I can actually remember what I read.”

“What I _am_ is concerned. Ben, I don’t say this to hurt you, but Rey’s not done with her secrets. You’re my nephew, and I don’t want anything to happen to you. If you insist on continuing with her, please be careful and always keep your senses open.”

Ben swallowed and could barely look at his uncle. Why did he have to nudge that scraping of doubt under his skin? His mind reeled back to the earlier fight. “Were you really going to kill her?”

Luke exhaled and set his eyes to the ground. “I considered it. Knowing what I know, knowing where she came from. Ben, I came face to face with Palpatine and I can’t…begin to describe what fear that puts in my soul knowing that’s who she is.”

Ben fought the tightness in his throat and a swell of anger he’d never felt before. “So if I hadn’t stopped you…”

He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up. Luke was smiling. “Ben, let’s just say I was counting on you stopping me.”

Ben flinched. “What do you mean?”

Luke chuckled. “You haven’t changed. And I get it. When you were small, with your powers so weak, you never thought you’d be a worthy Jedi. So you gave up on that goal, set your sights on others. When you have a goal you can achieve, you obliterate it, don’t you?”

“Well I didn’t get two PhD’s by being a quitter. Do you know what I had to go through to get those? I st _arted_ college courses when I was fourteen.”

“And did damn well for yourself, right? Because you had a goal. I couldn’t get you to fight me because you felt the goal of getting the lightsaber was unattainable. But when you felt Rey was in danger, you had a goal, and you would have done anything to achieve that goal of protecting her. It’s that drive right there that will help you break through the suppression.” Luke shrugged. “The result kicked my ass, wasn’t too thrilled about that, nor was I expecting it, but it got you going, got you moving.”

“So…you knew I would protect her. Knowing how completely inept I am at any of this, you still knew I would jump in to save her.”

“You have the brilliant mind of a scientist, but you have the heart of a hero.”

It was rare to feel good about himself. Ben never in a thousand years would have considered himself a hero. But he had been, hadn’t he? For love…

Luke sighed. “Though I considered striking her down, the feeling passed once she was defenseless. I could finally see her as the confused young woman being pulled apart by two sides of herself. I had mercy on my father, who had done horrendous things. I couldn’t strike her down for far less.” He looked at Ben. “You have a calming effect on her. The two of you complete each other.”

Ben nodded. “Two that are one, opposites meeting in the middle, Light in the Darkness, Darkness in the Light.”

Luke patted his shoulder. “Just be careful, Ben, like I said. You have a big heart, but you can’t let it blind you.”

“I’ll…take your advice under consideration.”

Han shrugged. “So? Do I take a ticking time bomb on my ship or what?”

Luke looked back and forth from Ben to Han. “I think Ben here is your best bet to keep that bomb from ticking. I don’t know if I could fully trust her, but I think you should trust him.”

Ben blinked. “I think that’s the nicest thing you ever said to me.”

“Well, you’ve earned it, that lightsaber, too.”

Ben was overwhelmed by his uncle’s praise. “Wow…thanks.”

“So, do I get a goodbye hug?”

Ben shrugged, but the corners of his mouth turned up. “You _did_ come after me with a lightsaber.”

“You _did_ blow up the Temple.”

“You _did_ scare me.”

“I will tell you what I told you every time you contradicted me with a quote from one of the Jedi texts: shut up, Ben.”

Ben chuckled and finally gave his uncle a hug.

“You give my love to your mother when you see her.” Luke leaned back. “Does she still call you muffin?”

Ben nodded. “Oh yeah. All the time.”

Luke rolled his eyes.

#

Later that night, Ben stood in the cargo bay before five projection blocks, formulas written in bright blue filling every space. He shook his head. “No, I’m missing something somewhere. Well Melanie, looks like it’ll be a three Hyper-Fuel night. Can you get the extra bottles from the galley?”

“Of course, Dr. Solo,” the droid said. “And might I say, thank you for bringing sexy back to the universe.”

Ben bubbled for just a moment, and then it felt hollow. Hm. Usually Melanie’s programmed praise gave him just the boost he needed to get through the tough spots in his work. But that was the thing; she was programmed to do it.

Rey touched him of her own volition, with no one telling her to do so. She made that choice. Chose him, even when she didn’t have to.

Ah, there it was, that warm bubbly feeling he’d been looking for. He smiled. “Actually, Melanie, before you—” He turned and realized she had already headed off to the galley, and his current Hyper-Fuel was sitting on the far cargo crate.

He could walk over, but usually when he did that he’d distract himself with some other barrage of thoughts in his head. No, he really had to concentrate.

Concentrate…

Ben held out his hand and hoped, truly hoped. He felt along the energy of the Force all the way to the bottle. With effort and pure focus, he lifted it and drew it through the air into his hand. He let out a squee of excitement over his accomplishment, thirty years in the making, and admired the bottle like an old lover. “It’s going to be a good night.” He popped the cap and gulped down the syrupy gut-rotter that made all his work possible.

When he turned back to his formula, the answer was so obvious. He set the bottle down, made the necessary changes to the math, and stepped back. It was beautiful, pure poetry.

“Yes!” he cried with his hands in the air. “YESSSSSS!”

“Good stuff?”

“GAH!” Ben sprung up and clutched his hand to his chest. Rey was standing in the doorway.

“You can’t tell me I still scare you.” She shrugged. “Or maybe I do. Maybe even more now.”

“What? No. No, of course not. I just startle easily on a good day.” He looked up at his formula. “Just lost in my own head, I forget the rest of the world exists.”

Rey stepped inside. “So what wizardry are we cheering today?”

Ben wiggled his fingers, excitement shooting out of his pores. “Look at this. Just look at this beauty before you.” He ran her through all the formulas and calculations that altered the chemistry of his Darth Vader polymer. To Rey’s credit, she feigned interest much better than anyone else he explained his work to. Her eyes only glazed over slightly and she never begged him to stop or started crying. “And there, right there, that’s where I was stuck. But now, just look at it. This…this changes everything.”

Rey nodded. “So, what exactly does it change? In…common terms, for those of us who believe this is a language from another galaxy.”

He spread his arms wide, chest puffed out in the greatness of his creation. “Tor-flex!”

Rey pressed her lips together. “Tor-flex. That’s…that’s great.”

He danced on his toes. “But it is! Don’t you see?” He pointed at the chemistry formula. “Besides the torillium, you add just a tiny bit of voxorium right here and boom! The same indestructible strength, resistance to electricity and plasma fire, but as flexible as fabric. The armor from the Vader costume as wearable as a shirt!”

Rey’s eyes widened in wonder. “So you’re saying this…whatever you just wrote here is a formula that can make that armor as wearable as any article of clothing?”

“Yes! And it’s all because of you!”

Rey flinched. “What?”

He paced the room in fanatic excitement. “It dawned on me as I was thinking about what happened today. What if I wasn’t able to open my powers? What if I would always be as pathetic as I always was? What if I couldn’t save you? If I could solve it all differently, what would I do? And then I thought, well, if she was wearing my Vader costume, Uncle Luke probably wouldn’t have been able to hurt her, so I could be a complete failure but you’d still be safe!”

“Ben, you’re not—”

“But I know you’d never go around in my costume, especially since I need it for Galacticon, but even so, you’d never go for a full body suit like a Storm Trooper so what if— _what if_ —it was just like what you’re wearing. If it didn’t feel like armor but it was. You could wear it and always be safe and I’d never have to worry about losing you!”

He smiled, so fulfilled with this solution—to have solved a problem, generated a new invention, and found a way to keep himself from being anxious she’d get hurt every two seconds.

He turned to Rey, sure that she’d be jumping up and down just like him. Instead, she just stared at him, her eyes unreadable. Uh oh. “Rey? You okay? Did I say something wrong?” She didn’t respond, just blinked, her lovely chest rising and falling with her breaths. “Oh…is it like a fashion thing? Because I can make it look just like your outfit right now. Well, sort of. We may need some patterns. I'm sure I can get Melanie to download some patterns so we…” She closed her eyes and his stomach tried to punch its way out of his body. “Rey, please tell me what I did wrong.”

“Nothing,” she said, her voice so small. “You…did everything right.”

Ben tilted his head. “Then…why do you seem so sad?”

“I’m not. I’m just overwhelmed…that you’d care so much…now that you know who I am, what I am…”

“Heyyy.” Ben put his hands on her shoulders. “I don’t care about that. To me, you’re just Rey.”

Anger, but also pain in her eyes. “How can you just think that? You saw me! You saw what I can do! Who I am, where I come from. I should be your worst nightmare.”

“No, Rey. You pick my worst nightmares out of my hair.”

She laughed, but it collapsed into sobs. Ben’s heart broke for her. She seemed so shrunken and alone, nothing like the fierce space pirate persona she usually wore. But he understood it all too well. Too many times, when he was finally away from the judging eyes, he’d feel shriveled and alone. But she wasn’t alone. Not anymore.

He slid his arms around her, cautious at first, not sure if she’d punch him. Instead, she curled against his chest, so warm, so soft, even if her armor was poking him in the biceps. He held her tightly, resting his chin on her silky hair.

“You should be afraid of me,” she whispered.

“I am, but not of that part of you, just the general anxiety I greet everyone with.”

“Well it _should_ scare you. I could turn into a monster at any time. You saw it.”

“I don’t know why, but that’s the part that scares me the least.”

Rey pulled back. “How can you even say that? You mean you were more afraid of me as a regular person than as a Sith descendant?”

“Are you kidding? Regular people scare the hell out of me! But you? You’re the only one who’s ever treated me with respect, like a person instead of a punching bag. The last woman I asked on a date? She posted advertisements on four planets pointing out everything wrong with me and why I should be avoided at all costs.”

“Oh come on—”

He tapped his comm bracelet. “I can bring it up! They’re still out there! She’s literally _still_ paying to have them out there for four worlds to see.”

Rey glared at him and shook her head. “I’ll kill her.”

Ben bit his lip. “Orrrr, maybe we could just get the ads taken down, maybe hack her account a little? Post photo edits of her in compromising positions with descendants of the Hutts?”

Rey touched his cheek. “How could anyone hurt you like that? And you—you don’t even want to kill her. Even being treated like garbage you’re still a good person. I don’t know that I could ever be like you, so full of that beautiful light. It makes sense. I’m the darkness and you’re the light. The two opposites coming together—”

“Whoa, what are you talking about? I’m not the light, you’re the light.”

Rey laughed. “Oh now that’s funny.”

“No it’s not. It’s the truth.”

“Ben, there comes a point at which when you see someone shoot Force-lightning, especially against Luke Skywalker, that maybe they’re the darkness.”

“Well you can’t be, because you’re my light.”

Rey shook her head. “What?”

“I’ve been in the dark all my life. I’ve been nothing but a dim shadow, living in my parents’ basement, the galaxy barely knows I exist. I was alone and hidden, I can’t even go out in the sunlight, just turned off from everything but my work and games. And then you come along and…” He smiled. “You make me strong. You make me feel good about myself. Every time I see you, I smile inside. You support me when I’m freaking out, you defend me when everyone treats me like crap, and I couldn’t use my powers for shit until they were brought out because of you.” He pointed at his board. “I even came up with this new formula, far more useful than the last one, because of you.” He shook his head. “You brought me out of the darkness. If that’s not light, I don’t know what is.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks, her chin quivering. “I can’t remember the last time I cried! I haven’t felt…anything but anger and pure rage for as long as I can remember. I’ve seen the ugliest of humanity, damnit, I’ve been the ugliest of humanity. I’ve done terrible things, and I didn’t care. I didn’t allow myself to care. And then I meet you and…you opened up everything in me. You let me feel like there’s more to life than just being a tool of destruction. You opened my eyes and warmed my heart, gave me something to care about, someone to care about, someone who’s such a beacon of goodness I still can’t believe you’re real, because if you are, then everything I’ve hated about the universe is wrong. You made me realize there is good, there is nobility, and honor, and kindness. You’ve…softened a long dead, stone heart, made me feel alive. You have to be the light, because nothing else could light the darkness in me like you can.”

Ben swallowed and traced the delicate curves of her face. “Maybe we’ve been thinking about it all wrong. You were right. Jedi and Sith, they always only dealt in absolutes. Maybe we’re not opposites coming together but a mix that understands each other. You’ve been my strength when I was weak.”

“And you’ve been my softness when I knew nothing but hardness.”

“You’ve been my courage when I’ve been afraid.”

“And you’ve been illumination when I’ve been so blind.”

“You’ve woken me to be more of my true self than I ever could have done alone.”

“And you’ve done the same for me.”

“That’s why I’m not afraid of this part of you. Because I share it with you. Wherever you are, I’m there too.”

Rey’s smile broke through the pain on her face. “Ben…”

Looking into her eyes, his heart soared and broke over and over for her. Such pain in this precious woman, when all he could see was her light. Nothing else mattered. Her past didn’t matter, her lineage, none of it. He knew what he felt when he was with her, and that’s all that mattered.

He leaned forward. _I can do this…I hope I can do this_. Arching down, he nudged his nose just next to hers, feeling her out, making sure he wasn’t about to do something stupid. She didn’t punch him, so that was a good sign. Closing his eyes, he let his soul guide him home and kissed her lips.

Instant heaven. The woes of the galaxy fell away until the universe just consisted of the two of them in perfect bliss. He wrapped his arms around her, felt hers around him, and just sunk into a kiss that made his body tingle and his heart scream in delight.

He parted from the kiss just to look at her, to see and believe with his own eyes that someone this beautiful wanted someone like him. It was real. She was real, and she wanted him despite all his numerous flaws and quirks.

“Ben?” Her lips were so lovely and pink as she smiled. “Whatever happens from here on out, I want you to know you’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”

He smiled and brushed the delicate brown waves of her hair from her face. “I feel it too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, we needed some fluff and mush in here, my work is done for the day.
> 
> And what's this about Kylo Ren? He's not the same person as Ben?? But...but... All shall be revealed in the next chapter!
> 
> PS The moodboard was reused because this is sort of a continuation of Chapter 5 when it had gotten way too unwieldy in size and had to be split. Also I'm lazy.


	7. Calculus and a Whiskey Sour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Ben, there's a time and place for calculus, and it's not in the arms of a beautiful woman!  
> A dyad anomaly prompts Rey to explain exactly who Kylo Ren is. But when one of Han's past drunken antics catches up with him, our poor nerdy space muffin will face a dark night of the soul - but he won't have to face it alone.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The angst and mush is strong with the second half of this chapter, so it's a bit more tearjerky than our previous chapters. Our nerdy space muffin has a bit of a falling out with his whiskey sour dad, but all necessary for the good ole fun of the next chapter! So grab a tissue box, try not to hit Han, but still enjoy some laughs as we go along. Seriously, there's a time and place for calculus, Ben...
> 
> Oh yeah, and things get a little steamy(er)(ish), sort of...Ben's a work in progress...

“Ready?” Finn asked, his lightsaber at the ready.

Rey watched as Ben licked his lips, hands already sweaty on his hilt. They had cleared the cargo bay of the Falcon for Ben’s training, and he needed the ultimate crash course. It would be three days to Kef Bir, the planet that held the remains of the Death Star. Three days to turn Ben into a warrior.

Ben’s fingertips were white from this grip on the saber. “Okay…okay, but go slow!”

“I promise. Ready and one!” Both swung their sabers toward each other.

The resulting clash of sparks made Ben jump. “Why does it have to be so loud?”

“Concentrate!” Rey said, her arms crossed. This was already not going well. “And lower your stance. Your center of gravity should be in your thighs.”

“But I’m getting sore already.”

“Good! You’ll build up muscle. Keeping your center of gravity low will help you maintain your balance.”

“Okay, but what about the noise?”

“Ben, we’re going to war. It will get a lot louder than this. Best you get used to it now.”

Ben whined and readied himself again, knees bending to the appropriate position. Again the two clashed sabers.

“One,” Rey said. “Two. Low three. Four. Up five. Down six. Good.”

Ben blew a rogue hair out of his face. “This is hard.”

“And your five screen math problem was easy?”

“That wasn’t easy. That was fun!”

Rey massaged her temples. “Wish they made a lightsaber simulator game.”

Ben sucked in a breath like he had never experienced oxygen before. “YES! YES! We must make this happen! I can do the programming, but we’re going to need an artist, probably good to record some actual combat moves, maybe we should—”

“But wait!” Finn said. “To make a game like that, you need to understand the dynamics of lightsaber battles. I mean, really, you can’t create something you don’t understand.”

Rey flashed him a wink of approval out of Ben’s line of sight.

Ben nodded, deep in his own head again. “That’s true…especially for the saber controller component. Want it to be authentic. Alright, let’s do this again, I really want to process the arc and angles used. Think we should add electrodes to the game system to simulate pain?”

Finn looked at Rey. She shrugged. “Sure?”

“Yeah…that would make it more authentic. Maybe that can be an add-on pack, don’t want little kids shocking themselves. Anyway, come on, let’s start again. I really want to get a full feel for this.”

And just like that, Ben’s lightsaber training went from sad display to true effort. She could almost see the calculations flooding his brain as he examined every strike with astute observation. She suspected the night would be filled with Hyper-fuel and six screens full of calculations.

In the middle of a new maneuver, he suddenly stopped, his eyes going blank. She could feel it on the Force. “Ben, ignore it.”

He blinked and rubbed the bridge of his nose before turning off his lightsaber. “I…haven’t felt that in a long time.”

“He’ll try to get to you now. The suppression wasn’t lifted completely, not yet, but it’s enough for him to find you.”

“I was afraid of that. No big deal, I was just thrown for a minute there. I hadn’t had that in so long, and it just brought all those feelings back from when I was a little kid. Just creeped me out. I’m fine though. It passed.”

“What did he say?”

Ben rubbed his hand over his face and clicked his lightsaber back on. “Just trying to get me to distrust you.”

“He’ll do that, Ben. He’ll try to plant all kinds of thoughts in your head. You have to discern what is his and just let it pass, don’t give it any of your energy.”

“Oh don’t worry. I’m used to terrible thoughts plaguing me. Usually it’s in the voices of the kids who used to torment me.”

“Just don’t get sucked into what he says. I don’t want you to go through what I went through for so long.”

“Oh believe me, if I listened to every awful thing that was ever said to me…“ He swallowed, and the pain crossing his eyes punched her in the heart. Then he was back to his usual brightness. “Never mind. When they run through my head, I just put them in their own compartment and close the door, get my mind back on other stuff. I’ll do the same with this. I mean, that compartment is bursting at the seams, but I’ll make room.”

“That’s…so terribly sad. Ben, who could ever say awful things about you?”

He grinned. “Oh, if I tell you then you’ll blast open their door and slaughter them in their living rooms.”

Rey tilted her head and nodded. “Yeah, probably.”

He chuckled. “Forget it. There’s more to life than the shitty people who made my social life a living hell. Hey, does this voice in the head thing work in reverse?”

Rey frowned. “Somewhat, why?”

Ben raised his brow and smiled. “Maybe I can send Palpatine a flood of calculations peppered in with reciting the dictionary from A to Z. Maybe his head will explode and our problem will solve itself!”

Rey broke into laughter. “I’d love to see his face if you did that.”

Finn dropped his jaw. “Oh my stars, she laughs, she really laughs, it’s a miracle!”

“Tell no one what you saw here!” she said with even more laughter than before. When she finally calmed, she caught Ben’s adorable, grinning face.

So far he had been the only man to make her laugh from the depth of her being. Then a shadow passed over him that he tried to hide before returning to his training.

Rey had to admit, planting the idea of a lightsaber game into Ben’s head made him train harder than anything else they’d tried so far. Still, something was off about him. Ever since Palpatine started running his mouth, Ben wasn’t his usual adorably dorky self. Once training was over and Finn headed to the shower, Rey leaned against a crate.

“Ben, I know it sucks having that bastard poking around in your head. We’ll meditate and see if we can teach you how to block him out and keep others out of your Force-space.”

He didn’t look at her. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.” He sat on the floor, leaned back against the wall, and drew one knee up.

Rey scooted in next to him. “That’s not what’s bothering you.”

He shrugged. “Not so much the start of the voices, but what it means.”

“Just means he’s a dick who needs his ass beaten to a pulp.”

Ben smiled. “True, true. But I meant for me. Uncle Luke said…that as a little kid, I was full of darkness. And then the visions of the monster I would turn out to be—Rey, I had a dream the other night, maybe it was a vision, I don’t know. But in it we were facing off against Palpatine, and I…it was like I was this terrible asshole who had done nothing but cause death and destruction.” He opened and closed his hand. “What if…this suppression is lifted and…I become a different person? Become everything they feared? What if the only reason I’ve been a good person all this time is because my powers were cut off? I’m…damn, I mean I’m not exactly stellar. I’m afraid of everything, I bore everyone with my knowledge, I’ve destroyed more real estate by accident than anyone should in their lifetime. I’m clumsy, picky, sensitive—I’m not exactly the most tolerable person out there, but at least I know that I care, that I really care about others, sometimes more than I should. What happens when my powers start flooding back in? What happens when the darkness takes over?” He finally looked at her, tears in his eyes. “I don’t always like myself, but I don’t want to become a person I hate.”

She brushed the stray black hairs from his face. “That won’t happen. That’s not you.”

“How can you be so sure?” He sniffled.

“Because I feel it, just like you feel me. Besides, I have no doubt what they felt was Palpatine trying to infiltrate you. I could feel it when he spoke to you; I sensed a sudden Dark surge of energy, but I knew what it was immediately, having felt it most of my life. They didn’t know what they were dealing with and assumed it was you. I’m sure you have your own darkness, I sure as hell have mine. But you’re too good of a person to let it consume you. I mean, you kicked Luke’s ass, and…Ben, you could have finished him off before he ever had the chance to draw his lightsaber again. Instead, you hugged him and apologized.” She shook her head. “I don’t know of anyone who would have been so merciful.” She brushed her thumb over his cheek. “This beautiful light in you, it’s not going anywhere, and when the darkness rises, this beautiful Ben inside here will be there to meet it.”

The sweetest smile spread upon that darling face, his big brown eyes sparkling. “No one’s ever lifted me like you do. I’m the luckiest man that ever lived, will ever live, or even exists right now across the multiverse in an infinite array of timelines of endless dimensions—”

“You’re losing me.”

“Okay.”

Rey smiled, rose, and straddled his lap. His smile faded, that delicious look of apprehension and desire flooding his face. She slid her hands over his forehead and pushed back his black waves. “How did I get this beautiful creature?”

“I’ve been asking myself the same thing since you kissed me.”

“That sounds like a great idea, kissing you.”

His breaths picked up. “It does? Because I certainly wouldn’t mind—”

She silenced him by diving down and taking command of that pillowy mouth of his. For all his awkwardness and inexperience, his kisses were always perfection and drove her absolutely wild. She slipped her tongue deep into his mouth and felt his body go rigid even while he met her kiss with equal power. He made the cutest squeaking moans while his hands just flapped beside her.

Maybe he short-circuited.

She grabbed his wrists and shoved his hands to her back. Once they found a safe place to roam, his body softened once again. She sunk her fingers into his thick black mane and reveled in the smooth silk, so cool at the ends, so warm and damp closer to his head from his intense workout. His deliciously musky pheromones wafted up to her nose and made her want to throw him down and devour him from head to toe.

She could feel his hands creeping lower on her back, then retreating once they hit a certain boundary point. At the third time, she just grasped his hands and shoved them onto her rear. Again he was back to that frozen state, so she positioned her fingers over his and guided him to give her a good squeeze. He sucked in air through his nose and arched his hips against her. Running her hands over his body, somehow he felt stronger, harder, like he’d been hiding these furious muscles until the moment came to strike.

Rey left his lips to devour his neck, nibbling, licking, just enjoying the feel of his soft skin on her tongue and his beautiful sucking breaths as if he could never get enough air. She sat up and tossed her hair back before giving him another looking over. His eyes were so heavy with desire, those thick lips just over his teeth allowing in those breaths that expanded his massive chest in burning desperation. Yes, he was just lovely like this, so needy, aching, wanting, regarding her as a goddess who could command him to do anything and he’d oblige without a second thought.

Rey ran her hands down his rocky arms, all the way to his hands. She guided him once again, this time to her breasts. He went rigid again, as if he was trying his best to hold himself together. Without a word, just keeping her eyes locked on his, she moved his fingers to show him exactly what to do, just how she liked it. Once past that little wall, he softened again, caressing her of his own accord and arching up against her once more.

She plunged her tongue into his mouth again, needing to taste him, to connect with him so deeply as to become one. Oh, he was just too much. She knew she had told him he had to work for her physical affection, that she wasn’t going to just attack him at every turned, and well, that turned out to be false. He was just too damn precious and irresistible.

Rey straightened once more and slid off his lap. He sat there frozen, hands still in the air, mouth puckered, so adorably confused. She’d fix that. She grasped his belt, slipped it out of its clasp, unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. He braced his hands on the wall behind him in shock? Terror? Glory? All seemed like legitimate assumptions, especially with the look on his face. She slid her hands inside, grasped his satisfyingly ample manhood and gave it a long, loving stroke.

Ben sucked in a breath, hands desperate for anything to grasp. “Fuuuuu…” He closed his eyes, head tipped back against the wall while she continued to work him into oblivion. She loved watching him just melt, the corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly.

As least he was holding up this time.

“What do you do to me?” she purred, loving the silken feel of him beneath her hand.

“I don’t know,” he said in some barely recognizable form.

Rey grinned, picking up speed. “And what-ever shall I do with you now that I have you?”

He answered with a smile and ran his hand into his hair, gripping his locks. Then his brow furrowed, breaths hastening. “D U equals D on DX of partial F partial Y bar prime—”

Rey frowned, completely baffled. “What—what is that? What are you doing?”

“The equation for solving the optimization problem when you need to know the function minimizing or maximizing the functional.”

“I don’t know what that means. Why are you doing that?”

“To take my mind off—so I don’t…so I don’t…so soon…oh my stars…and V equals the integral of eta prime…”

Rey’s jaw dropped open, not sure what to make of any of it.

Finn popped his head into the doorway. “Shower’s free if—”

“GET OUT!” Rey roared.

Finn disappeared as if he had never been there, and Ben melted into a grunting growl before falling apart, hands draped on either side of him.

Rey tipped her head forward and sighed with a smile. She gave him one last little stroke that made him suck in a short breath and grin.

Ben wiped his hand over his forehead. “I’m sorry, I tried not to—shit, do you know how sexy you sound when you’re raging?”

Rey shook off her hand. “I’ve heard terrifying, not so much sexy.”

Ben pulled off his shirt and gave it to her. “Here, I’ll toss it in the cleaning unit.” He rubbed his hands over his face and let out a growl of frustration mixed with elation. “I ruined everything again, didn’t I?”

Rey tossed his shirt onto his delightful little mess and smiled. She crawled to his side and gave him a long, sweet, melting kiss. “You ruined nothing.”

Ben tipped his head to the wall and just gazed at her with his satisfied eyes and soft smile. “You’re gonna make me fall in love with you if you keep that up.”

Already too late for her. She kissed his nose. “Good.” She rose and straightened her outfit. “Apparently the shower is free, and you were up next. I’ll be in my bunk for a while if you need me. Don’t knock if the door is closed.”

Ben quickly wiped himself down and zipped his pants. “Is something wrong?”

“No, just catching up on a few things.” She made her way to the doorway.

“Like what?”

“Pleasuring myself,” she called back before exiting the cargo hold.

Moments later. “W-w-who-what?!”

#

After lunch on the second day, Rey sat in the lounge watching Ben tinker with gadgets and tools, affixing items to belts. There was something poetic about the way he worked, so completely focused, though he muttered a lot, sometimes calculations, sometimes arguments refuting someone else’s work. It was as if there were two brains in that beautiful dark head of his.

She hated to interrupt him, but her curiosity wouldn’t let up. “Whatcha working on?”

He didn’t look up, but he smiled. “Oh, just some gear for our little adventure. I like being prepared. I even prep myself for arguments on the Holo-net by reading as least thirty different articles on the topic, so anything they come back with is met with a torrent of irrefutable, factual data, like a slap in the face made of letters and numbers.” He sucked in a satisfying breath as if he’d just bitten into a his favorite dessert. “It’s beautiful.”

Rey nodded and tried not to giggle in adoration. He was just too ridiculously cute. “Sounds it.”

“Of course I usually get a rebuttal of, ‘You’re a dickface, get a girlfriend.’ I keep forgetting my intellectual equals aren’t found in the comments section.”

“Aw, you want me to rip their faces off for you?”

His dark eyes finally flashed to her, smile on his lips. “Maybe.” He snapped hatches closed on the compartments on the belts and strapped one then the other across his chest in a criss-cross fashion. Another he hooked around his waist, added the accompanying thigh gear, and strapped two more to his ankles. After popping his lightsaber off his belt and stowing it in a holder over his shoulder, he stood, shook out his hair and held his arms out. “How do I look?”

She answered through their bond. _Like a badass, sexy marauder ready to kick ass and take names. Do you have any idea what I’m considering doing to you right now?_

She watched his jaw drop and cheeks turn pink before he grinned. _I take it you like it?_

_I’m not sure I’ll be able to concentrate on the Wayfinder. I may just dump everyone off, steal your father’s ship, and make it a lovenest for the two of us._

He merely stood there, eyes widening, mouth permanently draped, pants already looking too tight in the front.

Han stomped in, breaking the sexual tension that hung in the air enough to swim in. He looked Ben up and down. “The hell are you supposed to be? Some kind of cos-weirdo-whatever the hell it is you do when other people are out having lives?”

Ben’s shoulders slunk, and he regarded his father with a mix of exasperation and irritation. “I’m preparing for our mission!”

Han huffed. “What did you stick in those compartments, your chemistry kit?”

“A _small_ one! _And_ my toolkit, _and_ my electronics supplies—you mock me now! But you just wait until I save the day with science!”

“Any room for your parasol?”

Ben crossed his arms. “Uh, yeah!”

Han snorted. “You better hope there are no inchworms or spiders on Kef Bir.” He grabbed a new bottle of whiskey and headed to the cockpit.

Ben glared at him until he was out of view, then turned to Rey with apprehension. “Crap, will there be?”

#

Ben kept his belts for the afternoon training session, feeling it better to learn how to fight with the gear on. Rey had to admit, he did a lot better this time than the day before. Perhaps the gear got him into the spirit for the mission. Maybe, in a way, it wasn’t so different from his cosplay. The outer gear helped him transform into the role he had to play.

And honestly, it had to be the sexiest thing she’d seen him in, right up there with the tank top.

Of course, doing better than the day before didn’t amount to much when it came to real world combat. It pained her to admit it, but there was no way he’d be ready in time, not at the level she needed him to be. At least she had Finn. Between the two of them, surely they could keep him from getting himself killed.

But what about when it came time to face Palpatine?

There was no room for Finn there. There was so much more he needed to do, helping out the Resistance. Palpatine was for her and Ben alone. Only they had a chance against him.

Thinking about that time to come made her stomach ill. She’d never tell Ben what she saw in her visions, hoping beyond all hope it would turn out wrong. That’s all visions were, just guideposts, telling you to change direction if you didn’t like the outcome.

They weren’t set in stone, couldn’t be, because if so she’d let the galaxy burn and find a new one before she let anything happen to her Ben—the man who saw her bloodstained past and tainted lineage and still called her his light.

Once that session was over, she sent him to the shower, needing some time alone to practice herself. She tore through the empty space, lightsaber whirling as she twirled, slid, leapt, and flipped. A good workout always leveled out her mood. There was no point in worrying about the future, and her past was ash and dust. All she had was now.

With Ben, the light of her life.

“You’re ignoring me.”

Rey stopped at the deep, mechanized voice. She thought she felt a shift in the Force. “Our time is done.”

“Look at me.”

Rey deactivated her saber, hooked it to her belt, and turned. “Happy?”

The figure wearing all black, hidden beneath a helmet lined in silver stripes, simply stood at the far end of the cargo hold. “I’m never happy.”

“Well that makes two of us.”

“Liar. I sense the change in you. I will find you. You know that.”

“Terrified. Really.”

“Your friends will be.”

“My friends will kick your ass.”

“They can try. All I want is you.”

Rey sighed. “Kylo, it’s over. It didn’t work, you know that. There is nothing for us and it’s time we ended Palpatine and his bullshit.”

“You would leave me, broken and unusable, to chase after Ben Solo.”

“He is my true dyad.”

“Really? Then why can we still meet like this?”

“We won’t for long. He’s getting stronger.”

“I will destroy him, and then you won’t have a choice.”

“I will kill you first.”

“You’ll try.”

“Hello?”

Rey snapped her head toward the entrance to the cargo hold. Ben was standing there, hair wet and flat against his head, looking baffled.

Rey rubbed a quick hand over her face. “Ben, you’re done already?”

Kylo backed up. “What the hell? This is Ben Solo?”

Ben nodded. “Yeah, who are you—for the record, that is one hell of a cosplay. Are you going to Galacticon?”

“What is a cosplay?”

Rey thrust her hand out. “Hold on! Can the two of you see each other?”

Ben looked back and forth from Kylo to her. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I?”

She gasped. “How is this happening?”

“Fascinating,” Kylo said, “that you chose him.”

“I didn’t choose my dyad!”

“Is it the scars? Is that what turned you off? Don’t answer that. It won’t matter. Once he’s out of the way, you’ll come back.”

Ben flinched. “Out of the way? What did I ever do?”

Rey cut across the room, drew her lightsaber, and slashed through the image of Kylo. He disappeared, the room returning to its original energy. Fire still burned in her veins. “You will not touch him!” she screeched into the empty space.

She turned to see Ben scratching his head. “Hey Rey, do you think he was trying for Darth Vader? I mean, it’s similar but not really, I don’t know, mine’s a lot more authentic. ‘Out of the way,’ do you think he meant the big cosplay contest? Because I don’t care, I’m winning that damn thing, my cosplay is replicated right to the finest detail—”

“Ben? I think we all need to have a little talk.”

“Y-you mean you and me? Is it about him? Rey, who is he?”

“I mean everyone on board, and it is about him. That was Kylo Ren.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “You mean that Supreme Leader guy? What was he doing here? How was he here?”

“That’s part of what I need to explain, but your father needs to hear this, too.”

“Rey…” He stepped over and gently gripped her arms. “My horrible anxiety means that I will feel like I’m going to throw up until you tell me what’s going on, so please, for my stomach’s sake, just tell me.”

Rey slid her hand up his chest, over the length of his neck and cupped his jaw right below his ear. His eyes softened, melting into her touch. “Please gather your father and the others. We’ll meet in the lounge.”

He pressed his lips together, concern burning through that sweet face before he nodded, acquiescing.

#

“How much whiskey am I going to need to get through this conversation?” Han asked.

“Keep the bottle beside you,” Rey answered.

“Great…”

“Finn knows some of this, but there’s more he will hear for the first time. It’s about Kylo Ren, the Supreme Leader of the Final Order.”

Han huffed. “Don’t tell me; you’re boyfriend and girlfriend.”

Ben stood, looking like every piece of the universe was crashing down around him. “Rey?”

She raised her hand for him to settle down. “That’s not it. Ben, please relax. I need you to hear everything.” He slunk back down, looking like a puppy that just got slapped. She wished she could just hug him, but there was a larger matter at hand. “No, we’re not dating, but we are linked, thanks to Palpatine. As you know, Ben and I are a Force dyad.”

“Still don’t know what that means,” Han said.

Ben answered. “Two that are one in the Force. Imagine a person whose spirit was so powerful they couldn’t be contained in one body. It’s like that with us in the Force.”

“So you’re some big powerful Jedi in two bodies?” Han topped his glass. “You’re right, I will need the bottle.”

Rey sighed. “It’s more complex than that. But essentially the power we contain is much stronger than the average Force-sensitive. We can access levels of power even the old Jedi Masters like Obi Wan and Yoda couldn’t attain, that is, when we’re at full strength. That’s why we’re trying to work the suppression off Ben before we face off against Palpatine. Without being at our full strength, we don’t stand a chance.

“The dyad is powerful enough for Palpatine to want in on the action himself. Using old Sith rituals, he tried to create one between himself and Darth Vader. It failed, as it usually does. Nothing compares to the dyad born of the Force itself.

“Palpatine knew I was one half of a dyad and knew the other was Ben. Only Ben was unreachable through the Force. So Palpatine decided to try again, to force another dyad to use at his disposal, this time between me and Kylo Ren.” Rey rubbed her hands on her pants. “Luke was right about one thing, I did spend more time with my grandfather than I should have.” She shrugged. “I almost started to believe the promises. I participated in the forced dyad in hopes it could give me…what I really wanted.

“As usual, it was a failure, but not completely. It partially formed but not even a fraction of the level that’s between me and Ben, or will be once he’s at full power. Well, Palpatine was displeased to say the least, and that’s about when I realized it was all about him and never about me.” She swallowed. “I was his granddaughter, and he didn’t care whether I lived or died, only what I could provide him.

“When I left him and his plethora of failed experiments, he tried to get me to stay. That’s when he showed me the fleet of Star Destroyers and the army he had amassed. I realized then what I thought was just was some old Sith with a bunch of creepy followers was actually a dangerous mastermind with plans to decimate the galaxy, and he would have used me to do it. That’s when I swore I would end him.

“At least I got information out of him, that was the only useful thing he ever gave me. I knew the name of Ben Solo, and I knew the face. I just had to find him.”

Ben narrowed his eyes in thought. “You could easily have looked up my name on the Holo-net, but how would you know my face? Was Palpatine watching me?”

Rey shook her head. “No, that’s the part I wanted you all gathered for. I did use the Holo-net to find you, and that part was simple. Palpatine told me who your parents were, so finding you that way wasn’t hard. When I saw your face I couldn’t believe it, especially after…”

Han waved his hand in a circle. “Go _on_.”

Rey sighed. “It was the paternity test. That’s where it started.”

Ben rolled his eyes. “Stars, not this stupid story again.”

“Ben, what—”

He flopped back on the lounge couch with a groan. “Dad always says that, especially when he’s drunk. About how he’s so shocked I could be his son that he had to take a paternity test to make sure.”

“Yes, that’s what I’m talking about. When he did the test—”

“Rey, he’s just messing with you. He does that all the time.”

Rey turned to Han. “Does he know you actually did it?” Han looked like a grimy beacon of guilt.

Ben shook his head and waved off his father. “He did not. He just made that up to annoy me.”

Rey stood, her stomach grinding. “Oh Ben…”

Han leaned forward. “Look, why are we even bringing this up? This is just something between me and him, you don’t—”

“I’m bringing it up because it is necessary for what I’m about to tell you!”

“You know, you stick your nose in people’s business way too much, little girl—”

“It was stolen!”

Silence. Then Han, face pale, asked, “ _What_ was stolen?”

“The sample you collected from Ben. They did the test, yes, but there was still enough DNA to give Palpatine what he needed.”

Ben smiled looking about. “DNA? Sample? Wait, what was stolen?”

Rey hated what she was about to say. “Ben, your DNA your father collected when you were ten for the paternity test was stolen and given to Palpatine in order to create a new potential dyad for me. Ben, Kylo Ren is your clone.”

Ben still sat with that smile on his face that lost any bit of mirth that could ever behind it while Han turned deathly white. Chewbacca growled something at Han who did not or perhaps could not respond.

Ben gave a quick laugh. “He was just kidding about the…” Rey watched as the smile died on his lips. Ben sprung to his feet, horrified eyes boring into Han. “You didn’t. Tell her you didn’t.” Han said nothing. “Dad, tell her she’s wrong, and that you didn’t do it!”

Han put his hand to his forehead. “Ben…”

Ben funneled breaths as the stinging look of betrayal crested onto his face. Then he laughed the most bitter, broken laugh she’d ever heard. “So that’s what you think of me.” He jutted his chin out slightly, tongue rolling the inside of his mouth, such pain flooding him. Rey hated that she brought this out in him by her information. This was far worse than when she revealed his powers were suppressed.

Han put his hand up. “Ben, in my defense, I was drunk.”

Ben huffed, the inner rim of his eyes red. “Were you drunk when you read the results?”

Han hung his head in his hands. “Ben—”

“I was NEVER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!” Rey jolted, seeing a fury in Ben’s face she never knew was possible. “AND I NEVER WILL BE!” Ben shoved his hands into his hair and gripped it. “I can do all these things, have all this knowledge, and it doesn’t matter, does it? I’ll still always be a failure in your eyes.”

“Oh come on, I never said you were a failure, but be reasonable, huh? With all this screaming over bugs and hiding and crying and running from the sun—you were in the Jedi Temple at the time and still drove me nuts! All I’d get are contacts from Luke: Hey, what is up with your kid? Hey, he’s really not cut out for this. Hey, he’s locked himself in a closet because there was a fly in the temple. Ben, seriously, we took down an empire with just a ragtag group of people, against every odd imaginable, took down not one but TWO Death Stars, and my son hides in his mother’s coat when we go to the shopping mall. What was I supposed to think?”

“Damnit I was a kid when I did that!”

“You were sixteen!”

“It was loud and there was a lot of people—” Ben rubbed his hand over his face and looked up at the ceiling. “Know what? It doesn’t matter. None of it matters. I’ll never be you and you hate that. I’ll never be the tough guy with a heart of gold who could walk into a crime den and start shooting, who could fly his ship into the middle of a war and save the day. I’ll never be the fucking hero you were. And I’ll never be the son you want.” He shrugged. “I didn’t want to believe it. I thought it was just my self-hate telling me that, but now I know it’s true, and it’s been true for twenty years.” Ben turned, waved off his father, and stormed out of the room.

Han turned to Rey. “Are you fucking satisfied now? Do you have this insatiable need to air our dirty laundry all over the damn place?”

Rey put her hands on her hips. “You mean tell Ben the truth.”

“There are truths that he doesn’t need to hear!”

“He’s been suffering from the lies all his life! The worst part is, I bet he could feel the truth the whole time but convinced himself that he must have been wrong, yet one more thing to feel bad about himself for.”

“Feel bad about himself? If he feels bad about himself, maybe he should stop all the nonsense and act normal for once!”

Rey bared her teeth. “THIS IS HIS NORMAL! And you tear him apart for it every chance you get.” She shook her head but looked Han dead in the eye. “You know if Shirac talked to me the way you talk to your son, I would have put a lightsaber through his chest.” She left no room for a response as she hunted down Ben.

He was sitting on a crate in the cargo hold, head hung, his dark waves hiding his face. Rey could see at teardrop hanging at the tip of his nose. She placed her hand on his back. “Ben…”

“I’m okay,” he said, his voice cracking.

“I’m sorry. I never meant for this to turn out the way it did. I thought you knew.”

His locks flopped as he shook his head. “Not your fault. How were you to know my father wishes I wasn’t his son?”

“I don’t think that’s true. He’s just blind, or stupid, or both. If he can’t see that brilliance that is you, then he’s the one with the problem.”

He inhaled and she could feel his shoulders shaking. “Rey, please please please don’t take this the wrong way, but I really need to be alone right now.” He brought his hand to his face.

“Ben—”

“Please,” he whispered.

She patted his back, heart aching for him. “Okay.”

She did leave him. She wouldn’t otherwise, but he needed someone that wasn’t her. Returning to the lounge, she interrupted a quiet but bitter argument between Han and Chewbacca. “Your son is in the cargo hold crying.”

Han tossed his hands up. “What else is new?”

“Did you not hear me? He is heartbroken and in tears!”

“And I’m telling you that is nothing new! He’s always crying. He cried because he stepped in a puddle with his socks on.”

Rey clenched her teeth and shot fire through her eyes at Han. “Well this time it is different, now you get your ass into that cargo hold AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR SON!”

She must have turned her fury on full blast. Han slowly slid his hand along the fabric of the couch and rose to his feet, eyes never leaving her. Seeing actual anxiety in him for once, she could finally see the resemblance to Ben.

How dare he suggest Ben wasn’t his son?

In silence, Han exited the room, looking incredibly uncomfortable, as he should. Finn made a motion to wipe his chin. Rey replicated it and realized she must have sprayed saliva like a vicious animal when she roared at Han. Good. Then she did her job. Chewbacca just shook his head and topped off his own whiskey.

#

Ben heard the footsteps and really wished Rey would just let him be for now. It was bad enough everyone was always calling him a crybaby, but he didn’t want the woman he adored to see him as more pathetic than she already did.

“Son?”

Ben squeezed his eyes shut. Why oh why did it have to be his father? “I want to be alone.”

“Yeah, well neither one of us is getting out of that one tonight with that feral Sith pirate in the other room.”

“Just…go. I don’t want to talk to you.”

Han sighed and rubbed a hand over his head. “Look kid, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t realize you didn’t know the truth—things were just better when you didn’t know these things, this and the powers thing.”

Ben laughed. “Yes, life was just so much better when I thought I was an inept, pathetic loser who could carry Skywalker blood and do nothing with it. SO much better.”

“Look, she’s getting between us, and you’re going to have to decide which is more important—”

“Oh don’t you even START on me with that! She told the truth! That’s all she did! She told the truth and defended me and made me feel like a man instead of a weak, pathetic child like you do all the time—”

“ _I_ make you feel that way? Maybe if you quit acting like a child—”

“And do what? Be more like you?”

“You can start by being a man for once!”

Ben jumped off the crate. “And what does that mean, huh? What’s it mean to be a man to the almighty Han Solo?”

Han counted on his fingers. “The crying, the bugs, the dress-up—”

“Do you even see what I do? What I accomplish? Or is it all about my failures for you?”

“Accomplish? You sit in the basement and do weird shit, your only friends are droids _you_ programmed, you have no damn life, and you do nothing but live on your holopad!”

Ben threw his arms up. “That’s honestly what you think of me? Oh, I shouldn’t be shocked, considering you can’t even think of me as your own son!”

“I was drunk!”

“You’re always drunk!”

“Well what do you expect when I have to put up with your nonsense?”

“Oh, so now, it’s _my_ fault you’re drunk! Oh, you are incredible. So not only am I your primary source of shame, but I’m the reason you drink, too. Thanks, Dad, really. It’s great to know how deeply I’ve ruined your life.”

“Ben! Damnit, I just want you to…grow up and _do_ something! _Be_ something! Stop living in the virtual world and get into the real one for once!”

“I AM IN THE REAL WORLD! And you don’t see a damn of it! You can’t begin to imagine that maybe, just maybe your complete disaster of a son may actually be someone in this galaxy. You can’t see it because it’s not what you want to see, it’s not what you wanted—I’M NOT WHAT YOU WANTED, I GET IT!” Ben shook his head and sniffled. “That couldn’t have been made more clear to me today.”

“This isn’t about what I want, it’s about getting you where you need to be!”

“How? By treating me like shit? Making fun of everything I do? Making sure everyone sees how awful I am?”

“Damnit Ben, I’m trying to make you better!”

“WHY DO I HAVE TO BE BETTER?!” He broke into a sob and shoved a tear away. “Why is it so damn terrible to just be me?!” Ben tipped back against the wall, hung his head and buried his face in his hands.

“Ben…” Han stepped closer but still kept way too much distance.

For once, just this once, Ben really wanted his father to hug him, to just tell him everything would be okay, that he was just fine the way he was. Just once…

“Ben, I just want you to be normal like the rest of us, have that life everyone dreams of, friends, success. Isn’t that what you want?”

Ben braced his hands on his knees while the tears just would not stop rolling down his cheeks and dripping to the floor. “What I want? I want to be seen…for exactly who I am…because I can’t be anyone else. And if you don’t like me because of it, well join the rest of the galaxy. For everything I’ve done, I’m still just a footnote, because I’ll never be you.”

Ben kept his head hung as he stormed toward the exit, not wanting to show his father just how much pain he was in.

“Ben!”

He thrust his hand up. “When this is over, if I live, I’ll move out and you’ll never have to be embarrassed by me again.”

“Oh come on, Ben!”

No, he was done. He charged out of the cargo hold, down the corridors, and leapt into his bunk, closing and locking the door behind him. There, finally free of perpetual judgment, he grabbed his pillow to his chest and sobbed with everything in his soul.

#

Rey glared at Han as he finally returned. She’d seen Ben fly through without looking at or acknowledging anyone and knew things hadn’t gone well.

Han tossed his hands up. “What do you want? I’m not good at this shit.” He filled his glass to the top, grabbed the bottle, and turned toward the cockpit.

Rey shook her head. That was a lost cause, but Ben wasn’t. She stood and leaned toward Finn. “Stay out of the bunk room unless you hear complete silence for a half hour straight.”

Finn nodded. “Got it.”

Once she reached the bunk room, she shut the outer doors and stared at Ben’s bunk door. _Ben, open up._

_No._

_Ben, let me be with you._ She felt such excruciating emotional pain along their bond.

_I need to be alone right now._

_I want to comfort you._

_I know you do, but I just can’t. I don’t want you to see me cry._

_Ben, I’ve already seen you cry._

_Yeah, but I don’t want you to see me ugly cry._

Rey sighed. _What did he say to you?_

_Oh, you know, the usual. How I’m not good enough the way I am, I’m not normal, I have no friends and no life outside of the basement. How he’s been trying to make me better because apparently I’m not good enough on my own. You know, everything I already knew._

_Ben, none of that is true._

_Rey, I like you, I really do, but maybe you’ve been blinded by this dyad thing. If everyone in the galaxy can see what I loser I am, maybe you’re just mistaken. My own father thinks so and my mother just puts up with me, probably because she thinks I’m too incompetent to survive on my own, and maybe I am._

_Ben, the entire galaxy can’t think that. Don’t make things worse for yourself thinking so drastically._

_Oh really? Want some proof? Go on the Holo-net. Look me up. See how many entries there are and what they’re about._

She wasn’t about to, not wanting to give in to this level of thinking. And yet she felt like maybe she was missing part of the story. She tapped her comm bracelet and searched his name. 300,000 results, not bad at all. He was more popular than he let on. She scrolled through the articles. Most of them were from sources she didn’t recognize with one or two paragraphs about a new discovery, a symposium, or a published document in some scientific journal. And buried beneath those was a site called SOLO. It branched into discoveries, products, and documents. She realized this was actually his own site, buried so far down beneath everything else she wondered if anyone saw it.

 _I know what you see,_ he sent to her.

_Can you see it through my eyes?_

_Yes and no. I feel it more than see it. Did you know most of the temperature controlled cups out there have my name on them? Look in the galley. Pick up a cup and look at the bottom. Says SOLO on it. That’s because I designed it. Retains the exact temperature of the liquid you first put in it, no matter hot or cold, for twenty four solid hours. This ship? Most ships out there? They’re all using a new propulsion part I designed. The military on sixty-five planets are using a medpack from my company, including a wound sealer that seals and disinfects on contact and will remain in place until the wound is healed, never needs removal. Those are just a few of the three hundred things in my product line alone. That’s not including the patents I’ve sold._

Rey sat at the edge of her bunk, floored. _Ben, this is incredible. I never knew any of this._

_No one does, because even with my face on my own site, no one sees me. I’m nothing. I’m a footnote._

_Ben, this is not nothing! All these articles, these products—_

_Rey, look up my parents._

She tapped her projection, heart sinking. Over two trillion results. She dug through the first few articles teeming with information.

_You’d swear you almost know them by all that info, huh? Now search for 'son’ in all that._

She did and shook her head at the results: Han and Leia have one son, born 5ABY.

_Didn’t even name me, right? Isn’t that great? The mighty Han and Leia Solo have a son who’s so unimportant as to not even be named._

_Oh Ben…_ Rey didn’t even know what to say.

_Now look up, “I hate Ben Solo.”_

_Ben, I’m not doing that._

_Please. For me. Just do it._

Rey felt sick as she ran the search. Far more results than searching for his name alone. It was horrible, so many nasty things: Jedi wannabe, failure, loser, only tolerable for short periods, obnoxious, there was one about him being a pompous argumentative prick, crybaby, coward, can’t cosplay for shit, never live up to the glory of his parents, it just went on and on. She even found that awful ad some woman took out mocking him, and that bitch would not live much longer.

It pained her to have such a swell of enemies she couldn’t obliterate with her gun or lightsaber. Her inner fire burned to defend him, to silence anyone that would hurt this precious man, but this was an unfamiliar battleground she did not yet know how to maneuver. The only thing she could do was be there for him.

_Most times I turn it off. I have to. I stick to my work, play a few games where no one has to know who I am, and I try to just live and make something of myself, of my talents, my knowledge. But sometimes…sometimes…it gets to be too much. And I don’t have anyone who understands. I feel so alone. I bug my mom and she helps, but she always looks so tired, like I just drain her with my neediness. And my father never gets it, and now I see how much he really dislikes me, since I was ten no less. Just a kid and I make everyone around me miserable by being who I am._

Rey felt the flood of pain pour down their bond, enough that her throat tightened.

_I don’t know why you put up with me. I don’t know why you’ve been so nice. The entire galaxy either hates me or barely recognizes that I exist, even as they buy my inventions. I’m nothing, Rey. You see it now. You see the truth. Everyone sees it and maybe it’s time you saw it too, before it’s too late and I drag you down with me. Rey…I almost wish the dyad with Kylo worked for you, because I can never be the hero you’re looking for._

For all the soundproofing the bunk doors provided, she could still hear him sobbing. The pain in him was so immense, and it sparked her to want to tear apart the galaxy and punish anyone who would ever hurt this beautiful man in that manner. But that would solve nothing.

_Ben, open the door._

_Rey, no._

_Ben. Open it._

_Please just leave me—_

She thrust her hand out and ripped it open. Ben sprung up, pillow clutched in his arm, face so red, eyes puffy. He said nothing, just stared in shock with that full, quivering lip breaking her heart.

Rey climbed into the bunk beside him and took the pillow out of his arms. She placed it behind her and nestled in before reaching out for him. His face crumpled, and he sucked in an audible breath before falling into her arms. His head resting at the top of her breast, he broke down and clutched her in his arms, shaking, sobbing, her poor sweet Ben finally letting out years of torment he’d had buried inside of him beneath all of that adorable ridiculousness.

“It’s okay,” she whispered. “I’m here, and I don’t give a damn what the galaxy thinks. You’re more man than anyone I’ve ever known.”

He cried even harder, releasing what he had stuffed in those compartments of his. So much pain in this beautiful, gentle creature. She wished she had been there for him, charging in with her lightsaber any time someone tried to hurt him. He would have never survived Shirac’s crew on his own, but she wished he had been with her the whole time so she could protect him from all this vitriol.

“Ben, I don’t regret the day I met you, the day I found my true dyad. I wasn’t sure what to make of you, and maybe I hurt you, too, in my frustration. I didn’t know you then, but I’m sure glad I got to know you now. These Holo-net people, they hide behind their holopads—cowards, not real warriors. Weak, they’re nothing. _They_ are nothing. But you? The more I know you, the more I wish I had always known you.” She kissed his head. “You’re not alone, not anymore.”

“Neither are you.” He sniffled and sucked in a breath. “Rey?”

“Yeah, Ben?”

“Can you…do that thing, like when you pick the bugs out of my hair? What you do with your fingers?”

“You mean this?” She stroked along his strands, sinking into the smooth waves, tracing his scalp with gentle pressure.

“Yeah,” he said so softly and sweetly, nestling into her grasp. “I like that. When I was anxious and you did that…it all just melts away.”

“You know, honestly, while I’m picking at the bugs and spiderwebs, I’m also getting a little something for myself. Your hair is just so luxurious, soft and silky. It’s like heaven through my fingers. I could just do this all day and feel in perfect bliss.”

He laughed softly. “Maybe we are made for each other.”

“Maybe.” As she continued to comfort him with her gentle touch, his tears quieted. He just hummed with each stroke, eyes blinking, sometimes staying closed for a while. “Oh my poor, sweet Ben. How can a being so full of light have so much pain?”

He took a deep breath, his muscles finally relaxing. “How can a being of darkness be such a beacon of light?”

“I guess you’re right, you and I can’t be one or the other. We have to be a mix of the two.”

“Moving and flowing into one another in perpetual motion.” He nuzzled under her chin. “I love you, Rey.”

“I love you too, Ben.”

In time, his body finally draped with the heaviness of sleep. She remained holding him, closing her eyes to drift off as well so she’d be right with him all through the night, exactly how he needed her—and she in turn needed him. Neither had to be alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have your tear ducts exploded yet? Poor Ben... I promise things are going to get ridiculous and lighthearted again in the next chapter (with just a touch more angst as Ben and Han make up.) 
> 
> Okay, so I realize it may be a bit hard to swallow that Ben would be so invisible in the galaxy considering his company and the stuff he produces (SOLO cups LMAO I couldn't resist.) I'm going to have to ask you to suspend disbelief for the sake of the overall arc of his character LOL! If you recall, he says that Rey has to be the Light because he's been hidden in the darkness for so long. Yeah, so it's kind of a metaphorical thing. By the end this will all make sense.
> 
> If Ben's reciting of the calculus equation was wrong in any way (for those of you that actually know this witchery) I apologize. I had to sit there and watch a Youtube video on the Euler Lagrange equation to figure out what the heck anyone was saying. I've never seen those symbols before in my life and now I'm scared.


	8. Holding Out for a Hero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben can't shoot, can't fight, and can't get himself out of a jam, but can he still be a hero?  
> When the Millennium Falcon gets caught by Kylo Ren's Star Destroyer, Ben is in for the escape of his life with Kylo hot on his tail aboard the enemy ship. Feeling like a perpetual failure in a group of heroes, a drastic moment may just make this Skywalker rise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After leaving you all hanging on an angsty note, I had to toss a new update up quickly! You'll have a lot more fun with this one.
> 
> Okay yeah, so something pretty intense happens here, but I promised from the beginning that this will be lighthearted with occasional angst and no one but the really really bad guys will go splat. So fear not as you go ahead, but there will definitely be an "Oh no!" moment in here, just a heads up. Also, if you have never heard the song "Holding Out for a Hero" from Bonnie Tyler, please do so now, even better if you watch it on Youtube set to Ben Solo being awesome.
> 
>   
>    
> 

The next morning, Ben strapped on his gear to prepare for another training session. Han passed by him and huffed. “You still sporting that getup?”

Ben had absolutely no desire to engage his father. “I train with it so I can be prepared when we go into battle, Han.”

Bitter anger flashed onto his father’s face. “Don’t you dare start that. You may be mad at me, I get it, but I am still your father.”

“And you have the test to prove it.”

Han regarded him with pursed lips and an icy glare before throwing his hands up. “Know what, come talk to me when you get over it.” He stormed off toward the cockpit.

Ben shook his head. His father seriously expected him to just get over such a stinging betrayal? Ben had tolerated and forgiven a lot in his time, but this really gutted him.

A cry from Chewbacca set his heart pounding. Ben rushed into the cockpit just as his father flew into the pilot’s seat. Ben leaned forward to check the viewport. “How could anyone track us through hyperspace?”

“Don’t know,” Han said, strapping himself in, “but they did and they don’t look friendly. WE NEED GUNS!”

“On it!” Rey called. “Finn, down below. I’m going for the top.”

“Ben! Strap yourself in, damnit! They got TIE Fighters on us!”

Ben leapt into a seat and buckled his straps just as his father pulled a hard left. In the viewport he could see the multiple screens that showed the views surrounding the ship. A huge Star Destroyer lay in wait, while three TIE Fighters tried to corral the Falcon. One of them was fancier than the others, black and ominous in the starry sky.

Ben felt the world shift, siphon, as if he was being pulled into another world.

“Found you,” Kylo Ren said. He was seated, but Ben couldn’t see anything around him.

He heard Rey’s voice along the vision channel. “I will blast you right out of the sky if you try anything. Call them off and let us go or I swear you will regret it and I make good on those promises!”

“I’m sure you do. Hello, Ben. It will be nice to meet you in person.”

Ben pressed his lips together. “Um, likewise?”

“I can’t wait to see my lightsaber burn into your chest.”

“Ummmmm…like…wise?”

Kylo disappeared, and that feeling lifted, pushing Ben back into the reality—dodging shots and evading the Final Order. He gripped the armrests and closed his eyes. The Falcon had only gotten into a skirmish once while he was riding, and he spent the rest of the trip throwing up, even when the battle was long finished.

In fact, he spent the rest of the week hugging the toilet and refusing to sit in anything that moved.

Ben tried to breathe through another lurch while blast fire skimmed past the viewport. He heard Rey cheer at blowing up one of the TIE Fighters and would have been happy for his girl if he could just breathe. _Gotta be calm, gotta be calm, Dad—I mean Han will get us out of this. J of Y of X equals the integral of F of X of Y and Y prime DX—_

_Ben, this is no time for your ancient math spells!_

_Rey, it’s the only thing keeping me calm and not puking on my father and uncle!_

_…Continue. Don’t worry, I’m taking another of these suckers out in a second—BOOM! Ha ha! Woo! What a rush! Missed this shit!_

Rey missed it, and Ben could hardly hold in breakfast. He really hoped they got out of it soon. His entire digestive system was ready to pack its bags and head to safer pastures.

Ben jerked forward as the Falcon halted, glad he belted himself in. “Is it over?”

Han jacked a few levers and pulled hard on the thruster. Chewbacca cried out, and Han slammed his hand on the console. “I know! Fuck!”

Ben swallowed. “Are…we good now?”

Han sighed. “Yes Ben, this is my slam of triumph.”

“Well you don’t seem very triumph—”

“We’re caught in the Destroyer’s tractor beam!”

Ben’s throat ran completely dry. “They’re p-pulling us onto their ship?” He thrust his head back against the headrest, trying to find air that disappeared while simultaneously trying to rip the armrests off of the chair.

“Oh damnit Ben! Don’t start with that hyperventilating shit!”

Ben squeezed his eyes shut and just could not breathe or think or function. “The—integral—of the square root—of one plus one—” The world felt fuzzy and bleak until someone pressed a bag over his nose and mouth. He opened his eyes to see Rey standing beside him, devilish smile on her face.

“Take it easy, Ben, and just breathe. Things are about to get fun.”

“No fun—please no fun.”

Rey pressed her body against his arm and leaned her lips right by his ear. “This is what’s going to happen. They have control of the Falcon so we will need to get to the control system to shut it down and let us back out. They’re going to pull our ship in, and when they force the ramp open, I will throttle the initial guards. Then we’re going to leap out and start kicking the shit out of everyone there. It’ll be _wild_.”

Ben didn’t quite understand how this version of wild was a good thing, but her warm body against his, her hot breath in his ear; it did more to calm him than anything.

Rey unbuckled his straps, pulled him up, handed him one of her guns, and attached the holster to his belt. “This is for you. I have the caliber set high so this will go right through armor like it’s butter. Shirac gets the best shit.”

Ben shook his head. “I can’t shoot. I really can’t shoot.”

Han and Chewbacca nodded. “It’s true. The kid can’t shoot for shit. He’ll shoot himself carrying the damn thing before he shoots anyone else.”

Ben nodded. “I’m mad at him and I’m agreeing with him.”

Rey grasped the crossing of his two chest belts and pulled him down toward her. “You’re a member of my crew now, and you are going to head in there and fight like a damn pirate. I won’t accept anything else, you hear me?”

He curled his lip in disbelief she would expect anything like that out of him. “O…kay?”

She kissed him and everything felt right again, everything made sense. Her tongue slid into his mouth, making him moan in utter rapture. When she left his lips and looked at him with such fire and spice in her eyes, he knew he’d do anything for her, maybe even fulfill the duties of a space pirate, maybe even shoot something besides himself.

“Ho-ly shit,” Han said, his jaw on the floor. “You kissed my son. You just kissed my son.”

Rey turned toward the corridor. “That’s the least of what I’ll do to him when this is all over.”

Ben swallowed, watching the delicious sway of her rear as she walked away. He looked at his father who looked back at him.

Han thrust his fists in the air. “YES! Finally! Hot damn it’s actually happened!” He slammed his hand into Ben’s shoulder. “For the love of the stars, don’t fuck this up!”

“Ow!” He rubbed the sore spot before giving his father a bitter glance. “That is what I’m good at, right? Failure?”

Han groaned. “Are you still on that? We’re about to go into battle, can you put aside your bitterness and focus on the job so you don’t get yourself or the rest of us killed?”

Ben nodded, pressing his lips together. “Thanks for the faith, Han.” He didn’t bother listening to a response as he followed Rey toward the exit ramp.

She stood waiting at the top of the ramp, making no attempt to hide herself, so confident in her abilities. Ben wished he could one day be like her. Even a fraction would be better than his shaking, panicky self. Finn hid off to the side. He must have known something Ben didn’t. With no faith in his own abilities, Ben joined his friend, hands on the pistol Rey had given him. He watched as she stood there, soft grin on her face, waiting with desire for the ramp to be forced open by the hijacked controls.

The Falcon settled inside of the Destroyer with a bump that made Ben more nauseous than before. This was it. This was really happening!

His breath shallow, unable to force any more air into himself, he tried his hardest to stop shaking. What the hell was Rey thinking? Ben would never survive facing off against Palpatine. He wasn’t sure he would survive _this_.

Panic throttling his bones, he held her gun with both hands, panting and just wishing it could all be over already. Or maybe he could just hide in the ship, in a crate, maybe inside his Darth Vader costume. Yeah, that was probably a better idea, maybe she wouldn’t notice if he just slipped out and—

The ramp started opening, and Ben fired into the ship, blasting a hole in the wall. The crew jolted, Rey ducking slightly and trying to figure out what happened. His entire face lit on fire as all eyes turned toward him.

“Ben!” Han growled between his teeth.

Ben closed his eyes and lowered his gun. This was going great so far. Maybe he’d just get shot in the first thirty seconds and not have to worry about getting everyone else killed with his ineptitude.

The ramp hit the ground to reveal a crew of Storm Troopers, guns aimed, waiting for them. Ben felt the world soften into some fuzzy numbness, his fear finally getting the best of him, when Rey thrust her hands out. He could feel the waft of the blast and heard crashing before Rey lit her saber in one hand, grabbed her gun in the other, and charge down the ramp with a laughing scream.

Finn jumped out and followed her, Han and Chewbacca taking up the rear, Han muttering about Rey being an adorable little lunatic.

Ben called out, “I’ll keep the ship guarded!” Yeah, that was a good idea. He slid his head over the edge and surveyed the scene out there. Finn deflected laser shots with his lightsaber and flung a few Troopers with the Force. His father and Chewbacca ducked from obstacle to obstacle, letting loose with their weapons in between. And Rey? Ben couldn’t believe what he was seeing. She caught laser blasts on the Force and flung them back on the shooters, slid in and out of shots, twirling and leaping, her yellow saber cutting through enemies like they were weeds. And throughout this, her gun had a mind of its own, hitting its targets even while she wasn’t looking.

She was a phenom. How could he ever stand beside her in battle? He probably would have gotten her killed by now.

At least they kept the Troopers away from the ship. Ben took the opportunity to examine the hole he caused. No damage to the outer hull, just interior damage, but he came way too close. This was why his father left him home when he went on his excursions with Chewbacca. Ben could not be trusted in any intense situation.

The world shifted again, and Ben heard an ominous, fractured hum from behind him on the ship. He turned to see Kylo Ren standing there bearing a red, crosshilt lightsaber that spit waves of sparks along its length.

Ben’s heart stopped, but he couldn’t take his eyes off that lightsaber. It was the most incredible, beautiful piece of weaponry he had ever seen. If he brought that sucker to Galacticon with his Darth Vader costume, he would win that contest hands down.

Cosplay Champion of the Galaxy, that had a nice ring to it. If he survived to make it there…

Ben gave a brief wave of his hand. “Uh, hi.”

“Hiding like the coward you are?” Kylo asked in that deep, mechanical voice. “I’m not surprised.”

“I’m not hiding! I’m guarding—serious question before you kill me?”

“What?” came the impatient response.

“Are you wearing that to Galacticon?”

“ _What_ is a Galacticon?”

Ben breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh good, I didn’t want to compete against your—actually, would you be upset if I wore your outfit next year? Or were you planning to go then?”

Kylo swung his lightsaber and stomped toward him.

Ben put his hands up. “Okay, okay, I don’t have to—” Kylo charged at him and Ben did the best thing he knew to do in such situations—he ran for his life down the ramp and off the ship. Just as he hit the bottom, he heard that crackling hum dart up beside him. He turned and saw Kylo already at ground level.

“You are so gullible,” Kylo said. “Whatever is left of my part of the dyad, at least it had its use getting you off that ship.”

Ben tried to dash back in, but the ramp was already raising and far too high for him to reach. “Shit!” He ran toward the nearest doorway while Kylo’s lightsaber sizzled behind him.

After spending so much time running from bullies, the one thing Ben could rely on was his legs. He darted in and out of Storm Troopers, shooting randomly and not sure he was scoring any hits at all. Just a few steps from the doorway, a team of Troopers blocked him and aimed their weapons. Kylo closed in from behind.

“Drop your weapon!” a Trooper said.

Ben looked at the gun. “Oh, Rey will kill me if I drop a Rock-Hound gun. F-fun fact—”

“Don’t bother shooting,” Kylo said to his soldiers. “I want to be the one that destroys this waste of Force.”

Ben tried to breathe as he looked for a way out of this mess. “L-look, you should be nicer to me, I’m your clone, your big brother…clone, big clone—we share the same DNA!”

Kylo stopped and pointed his lightsaber. “I don’t care.”

Ben was so screwed. Rey was on the far edge of the hangar, trying to make her way over to him but constantly getting sidetracked.

_Ben! Hold on! Please!_

_Rey I’m trying, oh man am I trying._

_Kylo, I swear I’ll reduce you to bone fragments if you hurt him in any way!_

Ben heard the extra player in their little bond group. _With him gone, you will need me more than ever._

Rey would never get to him in time. Ben had to get out of this on his own. He squeezed his eyes shut and fired five shots at Kylo. When he opened them again, his nemesis was still standing in the same place.

Kylo sighed. “I didn’t even have to deflect those shots. You can’t even shoot me right in front of you. You’re worse than these idiot soldiers. I can’t believe Rey would choose you, a complete waste of air, instead of me.”

Ben tried shooting with his eyes open this time, but Kylo whipped his hand, yanking the gun on the Force and tossing it through the open doorway.

Ben gasped. “Rey is going to _kill_ me for ruining Shirac’s gun!”

“No,” Kylo said, “ _I’m_ going to kill you, right now!”

Ben stuffed his hand into a compartment on his chest belt and held up his hand. “Stay back! Don’t force me to use this!”

The storm troopers backed away with haste.

Kylo growled in utter frustration. “You soldiers are the most useless pieces of shit! He doesn’t have anything!”

Ben pinched the tiny, gray stone in his hand. “Ah ha! How wrong you are! Drop your weapons, now!”

One of the Storm Troopers actually obeyed. Kylo pointed at the soldier with his lightsaber. “You’re dead.”

Ben took the opportunity and threw the rock onto the ground. The resulting explosion spit red smoke high in the air, forming a blinding wall that cut him off from his adversaries. Wasting no time, he darted through the doorway, scooped up Rey’s gun, and ran with everything in him.

Pounding steps behind him said Kylo was hot on his tail. “You fucking waste of flesh! You won’t escape me with cheap tricks!”

Ben dug into his belt once more and threw another tiny ball behind him. He heard Kylo cry out and splatter on the floor from the ultra-slippery substance that spread across the gloss tiles. Ben looked back just once to see Kylo trying to right himself, desperate to find any purchase as his hands and knees slid out from under him. Ben flashed him a grin before sweeping around a corner.

Down the corridor, around another corner, he ran smack into a group of black-clad officers. Without thinking, he fired at them and hit the ceiling and wall. _How am I this bad of a shot?_ The officers ducked, looked at him, then straightened.

The lead officer saluted. “Kylo Ren, sir! Have we done something wrong?”

Ben shook his head. “I’m not—” _Waaaaait._ “I’m…not having a very good day! There’s an impostor dressed as me trying to take over the ship. I need to get back to the hangar to deal with him. If you see him, attack him at once!”

“Sir, yes sir!”

Another officer eyed him with a crooked brow. “Sir, your clothing isn’t your usual attire.”

“Yes, I know! He stole my outfit and my lightsaber! You are ordered to attack if you see anyone that looks like I normally do.” When they didn’t seem convinced, he had to turn on the one skill he learned while using a headset to play multi-player holo-net games. Pretending he was one of the monstrous warriors of his guild, he roared, “DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!”

The group sharpened immediately. “Yes sir, Kylo Ren sir!”

Ben cocked his head. “Dismissed.” As they charged down the corridor, he continued running for his life. Far behind him, faint and echoing, he heard a familiar roaring voice and hum of a lightsaber amongst cries and shouts from the officers. Ben zipped down another corridor and realized he was hopelessly lost.

 _Where are you?_ Rey sent to him.

_I have no freakin clue! I kept running and I’m so freakin lost. Kylo’s on my tail and I haven’t shot one damn thing besides our own ship!_

_Alright, get to somewhere obvious, an engine room, war room, something like that so at least I have something to go on._

_I’ll try…_

Ben zipped through a set of doors and wound up in a vast room with an open center. He looked over the edge. Way, wayyyyy down at the bottom was a turbine. _Okay, so I’m in some sort of turbine room, but not sure what level. There’s a bridge that goes across on the level below me, so whatever level is above that, that’s where I am._

_Hold tight._

Ben nodded and kept running, looking for a place to hide. Just for assurance, he threw down another one of the capsules that covered the floor in a slippery sheen. Just as it spread, Kylo burst through the doors, cape whipping, red saber roaring in his hand. Ben had to admit, even though his life was in imminent danger, Kylo looked pretty damn cool. That would be one hell of a cosplay for next year’s Galacticon.

Kylo charged in with a scream of fury before falling on his face once more. “FUCKING SON OF A BITCH!” His saber scattered across the floor, and Ben had almost considered swiping it. Then Kylo lifted into the air, and Ben realized his nemesis had figured out how to escape the slippery floor syndrome. With a cry, Ben skirted around a corner—

Only to find himself in a large room with no escape.

Kylo stomped into the doorway, his ragged, furious breaths growling through the black helmet. The saber lit the wall in its red glow. “You…are so fucking dead.”

Ben fired his gun again and hit everything but Kylo, who only stood there letting him try. With a sigh, Ben holstered the gun. “Could…we perhaps compromise?”

“No!”

“Hear me out—”

Kylo charged in with a roar. Ben whipped his lightsaber from over his shoulder, ignited it, and winced at the sudden brightness and hum. Kylo’s saber swung from overhead, and Ben screamed before blocking it. The effort made him stumble a few steps to the side. Kylo swung at his midsection, and Ben just danced out of its way, grateful for the hours and hours spent playing Holo-dancer that gave him at least some dexterity. Ben blocked a few more strikes, almost getting the hang of this whole lightsaber thing, when Kylo came thundering at him with such strength and speed, Ben just got lost in the confusion. They locked sabers, and Kylo pushed him against the wall.

Despite the weight cuffs from Holo-dancer, Ben realized he was at a significant strength disadvantage against his younger clone. Kylo pushed in hard, snarling, the burning cross-blades of his saber nearly meeting Ben’s neck.

_Hey, Rey, love of my life, if you could go ahead and save me now, that would be wonderful!_

_I’m still trying to find you, just hold on!_

_I’m trying. In fact, I’m holding onto Kylo’s saber with mine and I don’t think I’m going to win this!_

_Ben…please, do whatever you have to do. I’m coming._

Ben pushed hard again, but it was like fighting a wall. Wait, he had one more recourse. Summoning the Force, he pushed against Kylo’s blade—

And received a push back against his. He could feel the searing heat nearing his skin while his arms shook from the effort to hold Kylo back. There was no way he could get out of this.

Wait…

It was a strange time to feel bad for the person about to kill you, but Ben did anyway as he thrust his knee up and kicked Kylo in the groin. A mechanized, “GUHLLLL!” erupted from the helmet, and Ben shoved the red saber off with ease. Kylo crumpled to the ground, hands between his legs.

Ben darted for the doorway. “Sorry! That was a cheap shot!” He left no room for a response as he ran back out into the turbine room. At the far end he found an elevator and slipped inside. He pounded on the button a dozen times to get it to close.

Panting, he tipped back against the wall, wishing he’d never left the safety of his basement to go on this crazy mission. But if he hadn’t, he’d never have gotten Rey. No, she was definitely a woman worth getting maimed for, but he really wasn’t cut out for this hero crap.

The doors opened on the floor below and he darted back out. _Okay, I got away from him and I’m on the level with the bridge._

_I’m coming._

Ben stood there, just panting, wondering what to do with himself. His pulse raced, stomach gnawing and screaming at him to escape and run and just keep going until he was back on the Falcon in a crate and buried inside his cosplay that at least could resist all this potential damage.

He heard something but didn’t recognize it. Then boots hit the floor. Kylo must have leaped from the upper level, using the Force to guide him down. Ben turned just before his body froze. Kylo, helmet off, glared at him with such fury, hand out. Ben’s throat clenched, unbearable pressure from the outside choking off his air and blood supply.

“Not only am I going to kill you for that!” Kylo growled. “I’m going to do it slowly, just to enjoy watching you suffer and die by my hand!”

It was an odd feeling to watch your mirror image try to kill you. Kylo was badly scarred, deep, jagged lines cutting across the right side of his face. Other than that, the two men were identical.

Ben couldn’t suck in a hint of air, and his head grew hazy from the strangled blood supply. If Rey didn’t come now, he wouldn’t last long.

This was it. Of all things to die from, it would have to be his own clone. His father always said he’d get himself killed one day because of all that science crap, and damn if he wasn’t right, just in the most unexpected way.

He would die and Rey would have to face Palpatine alone.

Face…him…alone.

Ben’s dream flashed through his mind. Rey facing Palpatine alone…and paying the ultimate price.

Ben needed to live. For her, he needed to live!

And knew he’d do anything, and maybe, just maybe, had the strength to do it.

Ben summoned his energy and used the Force to push against Kylo’s hold. It did nothing at first, Kylo was way too strong.

Or was he?

Ben pushed hard, with everything in him, thinking of Rey, thinking of how much he loved her and had to protect her from that ultimate fate. He HAD to live! He HAD to fight Kylo!

The pressure on his throat let up, and Kylo twitched, so confused. He bared his teeth stretched his hand out farther. Ben pushed back with all the Force inside of him, the entirety of his strength. Moment by moment, the flood grew stronger, air finally sucking into his lungs, his head clearing with the return of oxygen. Ben pushed against the squeezing hold keeping him still while Kylo growled with the strain of trying to keep it on.

But Ben, for once, was stronger. He pushed his hands out against the invisible restraint, reversing Kylo’s hold. It was hard, so damn hard, but he could do it. He was strong enough to do it. For Rey, he’d be as strong as he could possibly be.

A flash of white from around the corner and Kylo flung across the open floor. Ben dropped to the ground as a yellow saber and a scream of fury rounded on the downed, caped villain. Ben scrambled behind a stanchion to catch his breath and keep out of the fray.

As he swallowed against the terrible pain his throat, he couldn’t help but feel, yet again, like a failure. He’d done nothing but run the entire time and now needed Rey to handle Kylo for him. His only slight gain was pushing himself out of that Force-choke. That was it. That was all. The rest? He shot the Falcon and no one else, made life harder for Rey trying to find him, and got himself lost in an enemy ship. His greatest achievement was the slippery floor gag and a knee to the nuts.

As Rey and Kylo wailed on each other, he could hear their shouting conversation and chanced a peek.

“ _That_ is what you left me for?” Kylo cried, barely able to keep up with her whirling saber.

“There was no you and me beyond the attempt at the dyad.”

“Liar! You felt something for me, I know you did!”

That sucked the air out of Ben. Was Kylo a rival in more ways than the obvious?

Rey’s eyes burned with fury and the thrill of the hunt. “I cared about you, because I knew what you went through. I knew the life you led. And I know we both face the same fate, and I had compassion for you, kinship. But I don’t love you like I love him.”

“What is there to love? He’s pathetic! He can’t fight, he can barely use the Force, all he does is run! He’s nothing!”

Rey slammed hard into Kylo’s saber. “Not to me.”

Ben hid back behind the stanchion and closed his eyes, his heart dancing at her devotion yet just as quickly falling to despair. She loved him, really loved him. And what had he done to return it? Beg her for help? Run through this stupid ship screaming and making life harder for her? Needing her constant rescue? How would he ever be strong enough to save her from Palpatine?

Rey grunted, and it sounded like anger but felt like something else. He peeked once again and felt his entire body jump into high alert. Though Rey kept fighting, there was a scorching burn on her side where Kylo’s saber must have hit her.

Something inside made him rise to his feet. Something took over his body, and he gladly let it. Something made him take three steps and thrust out his hand. Kylo flew backwards and slammed into the wall before sliding into a heap.

Ben pulled his lightsaber from over his shoulder and ignited it. His clone lay unconscious, but that didn’t matter. Ben would kill him anyway.

As he stepped forward, he heard Rey in some distant space. Perhaps she was trying to stop him. There was no way to make her understand. Kylo hurt her, and now he had to die.

Ben could feel it pumping in his blood, the desire, the thrill, the pulsing need to slash his enemy open and end him for good.

Then, just as the fire rose, something came in to cool the flames. Ben shook his head, snapping back into his senses, and immediately filed whatever that was into his special compartment of things that needed to not occupy his mind. He stood there with his saber still lit, watching the unconscious man breathe, the one who bore his face, shape, height, hair, everything.

Ben turned off his lightsaber and stowed it in its holster. He turned from Kylo and back to Rey. He didn’t quite understand the look on her face, but if he had to guess, she seemed proud.

And for a moment, he felt it too. But that terrible wound took the entirety of his attention. That wouldn’t have happened if she had been wearing Tor-flex.

He dug into another compartment on his array of belts and pulled out a spray bottle. “Hold still.”

“It’s nothing.”

Ben smiled at her. “Not to me.” After her return smile, he pulled the fabric from the wound and sprayed it down with his patented wound sealer.

Rey’s face brightened. “Oh my—I don’t even feel it anymore!”

“It’s the preferred wound sealer of the Chandrilian Military and endorsed by Coruscant’s top doctors.”

“Did you…practice that line?”

“I had to give a few sales pitches.”

Rey chuckled and nodded. “We should go. We have to get back to the control room to get the Falcon out of here. I don’t know how long he’ll be out.”

Ben nodded. “Right. Thank you for coming to my rescue. I…wasn’t doing so hot on my own.”

“You’re alive.” She took his hand, heading toward the doorway. “For an untrained warrior up against someone like Kylo Ren, I’d say that’s an accomplishment.” _Are you okay? I felt the Darkness rise in you, when you went after Kylo._

 _Yeah. It started as something else when I threw him. I didn’t know what it was, only that it knew what to do and would save you. Then, I don’t know, as I looked at him, I thought how easy it would be to just end him, make all our lives easier. It just flooded me, pulsing at me, making me_ want _to kill him. And then I realized that’s not me. That’s not who I am. I had to just shove it in a box and get back into myself. All I could feel was pity for him then, weird I know, but I did._

_I’m proud of you, even if he did probably deserve it for trying to kill you._

He smiled at her, feeling that special boost she always gave him. Even if he really didn’t have much to be proud of this day, that she felt it toward him was enough.

Han, Chewbacca, and Finn burst through the doorway. “Oh, thank the stars,” Han said, “you finally found my dumbass son. The hell were you thinking running off like that?”

Ben shrugged. “Why are you surprised I ran? Shouldn’t you expect that out of me by now?”

Han sighed. “Look, this ain’t the time. Come on, Finn here accessed the map system and we can get to the control room on the other side.” He stood at the entrance to the bridge and waved Chewbacca and Finn across. “Well? You coming?”

Ben nodded to Rey, and they jogged across the open floor of the turbine room.

Han waved them over, then suddenly froze. “Behind you!”

Rey spun, igniting her lightsaber in mid-arc and thrust off Kylo’s advance. “Go!”

Ben shook his head. “I’m not leaving without you!”

“I’m coming as soon as I kick his ass again!” Well, she kicked him in the stomach, anyway.

“Rey, I can’t leave you!”

“Ben!” Her piercing, fiery glare made him take a step back. “I can handle him. You will go. NOW!”

He could not disobey her, and honestly was way too afraid to. But what broke him was the unspoken statement: he would only get in the way of a real warrior. He nodded and took four steps before he stopped again. She was still fighting Kylo, still arguing with him, certainly holding her own, hell, she had the advantage. Four more giant steps and he stopped again. How could he leave her? How could he honestly leave the woman he loved to fight on her own?

“Come on, kid!” Han called.

Kylo looked at Ben and thrust his hand out. Ben felt it again, the grip around his neck, but he threw Kylo’s power back at him. It was a lot easier this time. The tightness disappeared and Kylo fell back a few steps from Ben’s shove of Force, nearly getting sliced in half by Rey.

Ben knew he should stay and help her. At least he could use his power against Kylo.

Rey kicked Kylo to the ground and when she turned, Ben felt the hairs stand up on his neck. Her vicious roar and magma eyes nearly sprung him out of his boots. “I am holding him back for you! GO!”

So that was it. She was trying to buy them safe passage by keeping the Supreme Leader busy. She was sacrificing her safety for them, for him. He had to go.

He ran to the start of the bridge. Han waved him onward but had his eyes on Rey. Ben shook his head. “Go first, I need to hang back in case she needs me.”

“Ben—”

“Just go!”

Han growled and made his way across the entirely too thin bridge. Ben knew he had to go, knew Rey was making sure he’d get across safely. But he couldn’t fight the compulsion to stay, to protect her, even knowing he couldn’t.

Kylo attacked him with another Force-grab, but Ben thrust it off with a lot more ease than even the last time. He glared at his clone, daring him to try again. Honestly, he was seconds away from lighting his saber and finishing what he almost started when his nemesis was unconscious.

Wait, what was he thinking? He felt it again, the damn darkness seeping in, trying to take hold, trying to push him in directions he didn’t want to go. Kylo was their enemy, Kylo was dangerous, and he hurt Rey, even if she barely registered it.

But Kylo was also _him_. Made exactly in his own image. Something kept staying his hand, a hint of compassion even if Kylo really didn’t deserve it.

“Would you come on!” Han cried from the middle of the bridge.

Kylo shoved Rey off of him and stuck his hand out one more time. Ben waited for the sensation, ready to shove back, but nothing happened.

Then a shout followed by Chewbacca’s cry and Finn screaming, “NO!” Ben whipped to the side and saw his father fly over the railing of the bridge, plummeting into the seemingly endless expanse of the turbine chamber.

“ _DAAAAAAAD!_ ” Ben screamed. He tried to reach out with the Force but his father fell too far too fast. His body pumping with adrenaline, something inside of him knew what to do before his mind could catch up. Ben took two giant steps and leaped off the bridge into the chasm after his father.

“ _BEEEEEEEEEEN!_ ” Rey screamed and it hurt so much to hear the terror in her fierce pirate soul.

 _It’s okay,_ he sent her. _Rey it’s okay. Just trust me._ “Wing command 5! Pro 100!”

Tiny pieces of metal poured out of the rocket mechanisms soldered to the belts around his boots. With wings solidified and spread, blue fire blasted out of the propulsion chamber, spurring him past the mean free-fall speed.

Calculations poured through his head as he tried to catch up to his father, making considerations for wind drag, gravity, and his own mass. The turbine was still well in the distance but wouldn’t be for much longer.

Meanwhile, music poured out of his comm bracelet, specifically one of his favorites, “Holding Out for a Hero.”

Of all the songs he could pick for his boot rocket invention, this was perfect!

The distance between them shrunk, but not enough for his tastes. Ben reached out on the Force, straining with everything in him to grasp onto his father and slow him down. He could feel it, he could definitely sense holding on to his father and pulled hard to narrow the gap. The time that passed could have only been seconds, but it felt like an eternity.

Closer…closer…only a few feet now…his hand gripped Han’s jacket and he wrenched up hard until he got his arms around his father’s chest. “Hold on to me, Dad! Hold tight!”

His father didn’t respond, but once Ben drew his knees up to get the rockets under him rather than from above, he felt arms clutching around him for dear life. The turbine grew closer, but it would be okay, everything would be okay.

Ben pulled on the mechanism hanging from his criss-crossed chest belts and a parachute puffed out of a pack in the back. Yanked to a steady drift, Ben called out, “Pro command 10, wing command angle 32!”

The fire from the rockets on his boots lowered, and the two men drifted toward a platform not far away.

“Almost there, Dad,” Ben said as the song entered its synthesizer instrumental section. Ben almost wished he had thought to set his comm to record everything. It would have made for a great product demo or music video.

Han just clung to him, occasionally making a sound. Finally they hovered above the platform.

“Pro command 0, Wing command 0.” The rocket mechanism on his boots shut off, wings breaking apart and retreating back into their holding compartments.

Ben’s boots hit the ground as the parachute fluffed against the wall before sinking to the platform. _Rey, we’re fine. I caught Dad, we’re okay._

_What? How?!_

_Promise I’ll tell you when we get out of here. Dad’s pretty freaked; I’ve got to make sure he’s okay._

_Do you know where you are?_

_I don’t know, a platform, pretty close to the turbine, maybe six stories up._

_Alright, we’ll find you, hang in there._

“Dad? Can you stand?” He released his father who apparently could stand but otherwise didn’t move. He just shook, face so pale, mouth open. “Come on.” Ben led him to a raised area. “Sit down. Breathe, okay? Just breathe. You’re safe now.”

Ben detached the ropes from his belts while Han took in deep breaths. He looked Ben up and down. “Wh…where’s that music coming from?”

Ben looked at his comm bracelet. “Oh, shit, that’s supposed to turn off when the rockets turn off. I need to fix that.” He tapped at the mechanism.

Han bore an incredulous stare through the ashen terror. “It plays music while you fall?”

“Technically it plays music for the rescue, you know, to be motivational.” He sat down beside his father.

Han nodded in some drifting daze.

“You can set it to whatever song you want, it’s pre-programmed.”

“You bought that?”

“What? No, I made this. It’s a prototype right now, still working things out with it, but man, what a hell of a test.” Ben scratched at the stubble on his chin. “I think I need to make the propulsion stronger. Not everyone who uses this will have the Force to back them up.”

Han shook his head. “Hot damn.” He huffed, almost returning to his usual color. “You even thought to bring a parachute.”

“Well of course. It’s the SOLO-chute.”

“SOLO-chute?”

“Yeah, here, check this out.” He grabbed the fabric of the parachute and kneaded it in his hands. “You have to get it good and warm and really massage it, break up the bonds.” He ripped off a piece of the now gummy mass, squeezed it into a log, and waved it in the air. “Then you cool it off for just a few moments to let it get solid again.” He broke the result in half, handed a piece to his father, and bit into his own. “Tastes like _neni_ berries.”

Han shook his head, baffled. “You…eat the parachute?”

“Yeah, it’s from my survival line, in case you have to abandon a ship and find yourself lost. One parachute can keep you sustained for two days with proper rationing.” Ben grinned. “I told you science would save the day.”

Han braced his hands on his knees and just breathed. “Ben…oh Ben…”

Ben put his hand on his father’s back. “Just relax, okay? We’re safe now, well, sort of, we’re still in an enemy ship, but…I just don’t need you having a heart attack after all that. We’ll be okay, I know we will.” He rested his elbows on his knees and after a few long moments realized his father was staring at him. “What?”

“Ben you…saved my life. With this. With…all this you made. You saved me.”

“Of course. You’re my dad.”

Han put his hand on Ben’s back, gave it a rub, then a pat, and pulled him into a hug. Ben froze for a moment. It was so rare for his father to hug him as an adult, it felt alien at first. But once the shock wore off, he wrapped his arms around his father, grateful he could still do so, still hold his dad, when only minutes before…

Han released him and patted him one more time. “This is incredible, all this you got here. You ought to sell this, make yourself a mint.”

Ben shook his head. “Dad, I _do_ sell this stuff. The SOLO-chute is going to market on sixty-four planets in three weeks. I made six million credits on that deal.”

The pale shock was back on his father’s face. “You what?”

Ben hung his head. “Dad…” He thrust his head back, trying to still the pain that still lingered from the night before. “I’ve told you about these things, about my company. You really haven’t been listening, have you?”

“Well I…I know you said some things, about wanting to start a business, but I figured that was just one of your ideas. You get all kinds of ideas all the time.”

“What you actually said was, ‘Better hope there are no squirrels near the building or you’ll never go inside.’”

“Aw, Ben, I didn’t think you were serious about it.”

“Serious about it? I kept telling you things were going well, and you just brushed me off. I mean…didn’t you even notice the cups you have on the ship? That say SOLO on the bottom?”

“Yeah, I thought your mother bought those because they had our last name on them.”

“They _do!_ _My_ last name! From my company! I designed those. Mom put them on the ship because I made them. The Falcon is running on a propulsion component that I designed!” He threw his arms up. “All these things I’m doing, and it’s like I still don’t exist, not to the rest of the galaxy, not even to you.”

“That’s not true—”

“My name’s on all of it! You don’t even look—or you see it and just think it’s a coincidence, but it’s not. What you think is just me fucking around on my holopad is me running my business from home because I think better in a private space. I hardly ever go into the office, but it’s there. A building, with a research and development floor and manufacturing facility.”

“How the hell did you keep this hidden all this time?”

“Damnit Dad, I didn’t! I just stopped telling you when it was clear you didn’t care!”

Han hung his head. “Ben…”

“It’s just like I said last night. I’m not you and therefore you don’t get me. Nothing I do is as important as the things that you do or have done. At least Mom is on my side. I don’t know, maybe she takes extra care of me because she knows it’s not easy living in this head of mine. Yeah I’m scared of everything, and I don’t get things that _normal_ people get, and I don’t understand people in general. I have weird sensitivities and I panic a lot. I have certain needs that don’t make sense, but she helps me through it because she knows that I’m not just a walking disaster. I’m doing great things out there, working hard and focused so much on my work that I don’t have much left for everything else. She makes sure I eat and sleep because I forget. And that’s on top of all the Senate stuff she does. Damnit Dad I know she’s tired, but she does it anyway, because at least she gets me. And I’m not just draining her. Fuck Dad, who do you think has been paying the bills for the past five years?”

Han shook his head. “What? Your mother works! She—”

“I told her to put her money away for retirement. I know you go out all the time with Uncle Chewy doing who knows what because you won’t tell anyone, and I’m guessing you keep your personal credit account filled. But the bills? Taxes? I give that all to her. She won’t let you manage any of it so you don’t know, but that’s the truth. My company is doing pretty damn well and my net worth is way more than the two of you could ever have done on your own.”

Han threw his hands up. “You have that many credits? Why aren’t you living in a mansion? Why are you still living in the basement?!”

Ben couldn’t control the rise of pain still lingering from the night before. His chin quivered. “Because I didn’t want to be alone. I’m so…fucking alone all the time! Dad, nobody likes me. I’m the easy target, the punching bag, I’ve been that way all my life. You tell me to go out there and find friends, find a real girlfriend—damnit Dad I’ve tried!” He sniffled. “No one can stand me for long. And I’m just tired of having my heart broken. So I live with you guys, where at least someone likes me.” He shrugged. “Mom anyway.” He shoved the tears from his cheeks, but the pain just wouldn’t stop. He covered his face with his hand and wept, wondering when his father would start calling him a crybaby.

“Ben…” It was so soft, so shattered, it didn’t even sound like it came from his father. Ben turned and watched as tears rose in his father’s eyes for the first time. Han grabbed him in a hug, and Ben sunk into his chest. “Oh my boy. My boy. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Ben squeezed his eyes shut and sobbed into his father’s embrace, shaking with long held pain. His father had never apologized and meant it before either.

“Damnit, I love you, Ben.”

Ben sniffled. “I know.”

He felt his father laugh and sniffle. “Ah hell Ben, I’ve been a real shit to you. All this time, all this…I don't know why I couldn’t see past my own stubbornness. You’re a damn good kid, damn good man…my fucking hero.”

The racking sobs returned, and Ben squeezed his father with everything in him.

“Okay that hurts,” choked Han.

“Sorry, sorry.” Ben sniffled, sat up, and wiped his face. He looked at his father and started to smile.

Han put his hand to Ben’s cheek. “I’m proud of you. I should have been all along, and that’s not your fault. That’s me, all me and my…fucked up ideas on how things should be. And what the hell do I know?”

Ben couldn’t stop his mouth from quivering. “That’s all I ever wanted, for my dad to be proud of me. Just once I wanted to hear you say it and mean it.”

“I should have said it a lot more than I did, but now that I’m not so blinded to my own stupidity, believe me, son, I do mean it. I’m gonna pull my head out of my ass from now on and…see you for who you really are, the most incredible man I know.”

Ben blinked down another set of tears. “You know I’m not going to stop crying if you keep being so nice to me.” He sucked in a breath.

Han smiled. “I don’t care. I need to make up for a lot of shit I launched at you. You deserved better, Ben Solo, from me and everyone else in the galaxy.”

Ben’s smile spread wide across his face, and he wrapped his arms around his dad. And he just remained there, head leaned against his father’s, content for once. He still had his dad because of courage he didn’t know he had and his inventiveness and ingenuity. Maybe he wasn’t such a failure after all. Maybe the blood of heroes did still run in him and only needed an opportunity to shine.

Han patted his hand. “How’d you know how to do all that, anyway? How’d you know you’d be able to save me?”

Ben shrugged. “I didn’t. I just prepared for the fifty scenarios that ran through my head when I prepped the belts, and the rest? It just came to me in the moment.”

Han chuckled and squeezed Ben’s hand. “You’re my son alright, and I couldn’t be more grateful or proud.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ending on some squishy dad/son moments and a bit of a cliffhanger (doh!) Will Ben continue his hero streak? Will Rey ever find him in the Star Destroyer? Will Kylo's nuts ever heal? Will the Final Order ever be the same once they've gotten a taste of Dr. Ben Solo? All will be revealed in the next chapter! (not so sure about Kylo's nuts though...)


	9. Revenge of the Nerd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Ben, what have you done to Kylo's Star Destroyer?  
> With the crew trying to escape, it's Ben's time to shine. Armed with a multi-driver, a pouch full of tech, and the knowledge of the ship's systems, the Final Order will never be the same once Ben is through with them.
> 
>   
>    
> 

Han stood and looked around the platform. “Well, we better do something besides sit around here talking, huh? I imagine the Final Order is going to want to murder us soon.”

Ben nodded. “Especially Kylo Ren. I kneed him in the nuts. He’s really not happy with me right now.”

“Then why’d he toss me off the bridge instead of you?”

“I resisted his Force powers. I think I might be stronger than him now.”

Han nodded but stiffened. “Coming back, huh? What about that there Dark Side shit, that coming in, too?”

Ben rubbed his arms. “Sometimes. It washes in and I don’t really feel like myself, but then I snap out of it. Rey said that when darkness rose in me, my light would meet it. So far she’s been right. I hope I can keep being strong enough to do so, strong enough for her.”

Han huffed. “She’s got plenty of strength on her own; don’t think you need to worry about that.”

Ben thought about that dream. “That’s just it, I do. She needs me more than anyone realizes. Speaking of, she said to stay put and they’d find us. I told her where I think we are.”

“Eh, shouldn’t trust comm connections in enemy territory.”

“We didn’t use our comms. Rey and I can talk telepathically through our dyad bond.”

Han raised his brow. “Really? Wow…” He bore a look of discomfort. “Those powers are getting strong then, huh?”

Ben nodded. “They have to. To stop Palpatine, I have to get back everything that’s been blocked.”

“Yeah just…promise me I won’t lose my son in the process. I know I bitched about you constantly, but after what Luke and Leia told me, what they saw in your future before we stopped your powers…”

Ben squeezed his dad’s shoulder. “I know, it worries me, too. I just have to rely on my good character to keep it at bay. Rey believes in me, believes that I can keep myself in check.” He smiled. “She sees a lot more in me than I do, so I have to trust her.”

Han felt around the doorway to the platform. “Yeahhhh, she’s…one scary hellion when she wants to be, but the two of you bring out the best in each other, I can see that much.”

“I love her, Dad. I know we haven’t been together long, but I connect with her on a level I can never explain, and she…makes me so happy, and she’s so beautiful and she actually likes _me_. I still can’t believe it…but I’m just saying, I love her and I’ll do anything for her, especially to save her.” He looked at his father.

Han’s shoulders slunk. “I get it, Ben. Just remember you have a family that loves you and wants you to come home. Save her, but also save yourself. You have a lot more to live for than to die for.”

Ben nodded. Moments later, the doors slid open. The bowcaster and Rock-Hound pistol lowered once the owners were assured it was just the two of them.

“Ben!” Rey shouted with such a smile on her face, it cast doubt on her ever being a Sith-descended space pirate. She jumped into Ben’s arms, wrapping her arms and legs around him. Ben squeezed her luscious body against his, pure delight washing through him.

Chewbacca cried out and mauled Han in a hug until the elder man begged him to stop. Finn stepped onto the platform and looked up. “How the hell did you guys survive this drop?”

Ben finished his mind-melting kiss with Rey and set her down. He picked up one foot and pointed to his ankle. “Boot rockets for one thing, and—oh hey, you guys want to have some parachute? It’s _neni_ berry-flavored!”

Finn blinked. “Wait, what?”

#

The group chewed on their parachute hunks while slipping through the corridors. Once in a quiet area, Finn brought up the map on his comm bracelet. “According to this, if we cut through the engine room, we can slip back up to the hangar control room with little detection. It’s a longshot, but it’s our best hope.”

Ben perked. “Engine room you say?” He rubbed his long fingers together. “Yes…yes…that’s perfect. By the time I’m done, they shall curse the name Ben Solo all across the Final Order!”

Finn stared at him. “You’re going from ultra-nerd to mad scientist and it’s starting to creep me out.”

Ben grinned. “Just trust me on this. Get me over there and I think I can solve all our problems.” As the group moved ahead, following Finn’s lead, Ben turned to Rey. “How did you get away from Kylo?”

Rey snorted. “Get away? He needed to get away from _me_ after what he pulled. Trust me, he won’t be coming after us anymore today. He may send his troops, but he’ll be doing it from Med-bay. He’s lucky he’s not in the morgue.” She looked up at him. “That was incredible what you did, just diving after your father like that. Funny, I recall last night someone saying he couldn’t possibly be the hero I need.” She smirked.

Ben smiled. “I’m still not sure how I had the guts to do it. I didn’t even think about it really, because if I did, I probably would have freaked out and…I’m just glad it was there when I needed it.”

“Hm, you may just be cut out for this hero business yet.”

“Perhaps.” He studied her face. She seemed so exuberant, even more than earlier today. At the beginning of this trip she tired easily. Now she was so energized. Perhaps it was the battle, being in her element. No, when she fought Luke she was in her element also, and she grew fatigued quickly once she struck out with the lightning. But something was definitely different with her.

 _What’s up?_ She asked.

_You seem so energetic. More than usual._

_You don’t feel it?_

_Feel what?_

_You. Your power growing. The stronger you get, the more I feel it on my end. I sensed it when you blasted Luke, again when you blasted Kylo, and when you were rescuing your father, it just filled in me. We might even be halfway there. All because you opened up to your true potential. Hero._

Ben blushed and tried to squish down his smile. _Stop, I’m no hero. I mean…my dad called me one._

_Ohhh, that’s a boost from last night._

_We made up while waiting for you guys._

_That explains the glow in your face. You wear confidence well, my sweet muffin._

Ben let out a squeaking giggle that had Han giving him the crooked eye.

Finn peeked around the corner. “There it is,” he whispered. “The engine room, two guards.”

Rey swept around the corner and thrust her hands out. The guards smashed against opposite walls and fell in a heap. “Not anymore.”

Ben jogged over to the access pad. “Time to shine.” He pulled out his electronics kit, connected a few wires to his comm bracelet, and held up a gold disk to the access pad. He tapped at the projections from the comm, sending signals along to the disk.

“Can’t we just shoot it?” Han asked.

“If you want to alert the entire ship we’re here, suuuuure.” Ben shook his head. “These idiots didn’t even change the default admin code for the firewall.”

“Yeah, idiots…” Han eyed the connection. “So you just walk up to anything and start decoding it?”

“Not everything, or at least this easily. But who do you think created the reader component that’s used inside that panel? Made a good chunk of credits off of that patent.” With one more tap, the door opened. “And now we have full access to any door on the ship. I mean seriously, how do you not change the default admin code?”

“Yeah, damn those…admins—let’s just go.”

Once inside the engine room, Ben’s face lit up in glee. So…so many toys. “It’s a 12-RX-40 design.”

“What is?” Finn asked.

“The entire thing, the layout, the components. This is perfect.”

“How do you know anything about this? I mean, this is a military vessel, not…Holo-dancer.”

Ben jogged in between the massive components, searching. “When you’re designing ship components, you have to know what you’re putting them into. I’m no war hero, but I know enough about ships to make parts for them—ah, here it is. Finn, empty your pockets.”

“Whyyyyy?”

“Because mine are all full of gadgets and I need this.” Ben popped open a unit and reached inside. Dangling from his fingers by their holding rings were glowing pink octahedrons. “Here, take these.”

Finn stared at Ben. “I don’t think I want these in my pockets.”

“Don’t worry! Teratospermia only happens after thirty-six hours of direct contact with the unprocessed ore. Just keep it above the waist and you’ll be fine.”

“I heard a long scary word and sperm. Nah ah, I am not putting these things in my pockets.”

“It’s just temporary infertility!”

“Give me those,” Han growled. “I’m already old, not worried about ta-to-whatever the hell Ben said. What is this anyway?”

Ben smiled like it was his birthday. “Voxorium!”

Han nodded. “Glad I asked.”

Rey slipped in front of Ben. “Voxorium? You mean for Tor-flex?”

Ben sucked in a breath, fluttering in delight. “You remembered!”

“Of course I remembered. It was such a romantic gesture; I could never forget it.”

“Awww!” He gripped the sides of her lovely face and gave her a kiss that made his own knees weak.

Han grunted. “Alright, come on kid. You can suck her face off when we’re on the Falcon and far from this shitheap.”

Ben brushed his thumb over Rey’s lips. “Hold that thought. Come on, there’s something else I’m looking for.” Through the maze of massive engine components, Ben finally stopped. “Ah, here it is!” When the group gathered around him, he used one of his tools to pop off the cover of a blue, glowing mechanism. Beneath the plate was a name: SOLO.

Rey brightened. “The propulsion part! Just like you told me about last night!”

He twirled his multi-driver out of its holster and stroked it like a lover. “Time to play.” Tearing into the component gave him a keen sense of pleasure. His handiwork, his exquisite design, as familiar as a child’s favorite toy. After snipping partially through a connector, he basked in the glory of it all with a sigh. “Yes…it’s perfect. It’s beautiful.”

Silence.

“What?” Finn asked.

Ben quickly sealed the component once more. “It won’t even register as damaged. The change was so minimal that the ship’s diagnostics won’t even sense anything has gone wrong, not until they go to take off, to follow us, and boom. Just…boom.” He giggled, high on his own sense of mastery. “They’ll be stuck out here for days.”

More blank faces, then Rey nodded. “You’re right, that is beautiful. Love it!”

Ben spun, his arms wide, making them jump back. “But wait! There’s more!” He turned and whipped his hair back. “Follow me.”

“Anyone else getting nervous?” Finn asked behind him.

Ben finally found what he was looking for. The black console glowing with so many switches and controls called to him like a siren’s song. He draped himself over it and ran his hands along its smooth surface.

“Uh, Ben? Are you making out with that control panel?”

Han snorted. “That’s what happens when your first girlfriend was a sexbot—sorry! Sorry! I couldn’t help myself.”

Ben leaned against the console and regarded them all with a smile of the deepest satisfaction.

Rey put her finger to her lips. “You know, it’s getting so I’m almost jealous of the console, what’s going on?”

“The 12-RX-40 schematic calls for the entire ship’s control systems to be linked. So from here, I could turn Kylo’s shower on—” He clenched his teeth. “—and make it super hot and burn that fucker for hurting my dad.”

Finn smiled. “So we don’t need to get into the hangar control room. We can free the Falcon from here.”

Ben stuck his tongue between his teeth and waggled his eyebrows. “I have an even better plan.” He knelt on the floor and dumped the entire contents of his electronics and tool pouches. With a twirl of his multi-driver, he dug into the paneling. “We are going to have _so_ much fun.”

#

When they left the engine room, Ben’s comm bracelet was bigger and more cumbersome than before, but he didn’t mind. Actually, he couldn’t stop giggling.

Opening locked doors wasn’t an issue. Han, Chewbacca, Rey, and Finn quickly dispatched any guards while Ben mastered the lunacy that took over the ship.

“What do you _mean_ the bathrooms are all flooding!” an officer cried. “How could they all be flooding at once?”

Down another corridor: “No, you don’t understand! Instead of the doors staying open until you pass, they close _on_ you while you’re trying to get through the doorway!”

From behind them: “What is on the floor?! I can’t get up! Get off me, you son of a—who spilled this substance?”

From one of the rooms: “Sir, I don’t know! The entire galactic map system is gone! Deleted! All the system backups are gone. We’re stranded unless we can hail another passing ship!”

As they turned another corner, they doubled back at the sight of a legion of officers. The red-haired one at the lead was screaming, his face nearly purple. “WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY SHIP?! WHAT IS THIS CHAOS?! GET THAT GARBAGE OFF THE SCREENS RIGHT NOW!”

“General Hux, sir! It’s out of my control. It’s like something else has taken over the entire ship.”

“But why THAT? Why would it show THAT?!”

The group tiptoed past the war room where all viewport screens were tuned into non-stop porn. Ben stuffed his arm in his mouth to hide his shrieks of laughter, seeing all the faces of the officers in varying shades of wonder and horror. But no one stopped looking. Not one of them turned their heads. It made for a quick getaway.

“I can’t believe this worked!” Finn said through his laughter. “I just can’t fucking believe this!”

Ben could barely catch his breath from laughing and running. “I sent the really hardcore channel into Med-bay so Kylo can get his nuts back into shape after I obliterated them!”

Rey was turning red from laughing. “Oh I wish we had you on our raids. They would have been so much fun!”

Finally at the hangar, they gave a brief scan of the area. The Storm Troopers were all mesmerized by the porn and nowhere near the Millennium Falcon. Ben tapped at the projections from his comm, and the ship’s ramp lowered. The group raced toward it.

“Stop right there!” said a huge, silver Trooper with a shoulder cape. “Don’t even think about—”

Han flipped her off and dove into his ship. The silver Trooper aimed her weapon, but nothing happened. “Why isn’t my gun working? What…what is this error code, F U?”

Ben almost collapsed from laughing as he ran up the ramp, his knees weakening. He plopped into his seat in the cockpit and buckled up, still trying to catch his breath. “Opening bay doors now.” An entire wall of the hangar retracted, and Han fired up the Falcon. Ben snickered as he tapped once more at his comm. “One last little bit of fun…” The hangar went dark for just a moment until the propulsion engines of the ship lit it in bright blue.

“Oh my stars,” Rey said, grinning, “what did you do?”

“Shut down all the lights on the entire ship, turned the heat way up, and left all the porn on. They’re going to be naked, sweaty, and fumbling around in the dark with nothing but porn surrounding them until they can break through my admin code changes!”

“Kid,” Han said, “I fucking love you.” The Falcon blasted away from Kylo’s Destroyer.

#

Ben draped backwards onto Rey in the lounge, laughing with every bit of himself as the crew recounted their victory over Kylo’s ship. She herself had never laughed so hard. It was one thing to decimate your enemies, leaving a trail of bodies so the next fools knew not to mess with you. But to bring a Final Order ship to its knees in pure chaos, that was just art.

And her Ben made it happen.

The change in him was miraculous. Ever since he dove after Han, Ben’s confidence levels shot up. He walked with a bounce in his step, giggling, excited, bearing a smile of someone who felt good about himself. Before that he was so withdrawn, nervous, and unsure of himself and everything around him.

He wore the hero cape well.

And maybe it was an effect from their dyad connection as well. The more he broke free of his Force restraints, the more power flowed into her. A good thing too. She was feeling better than she had in years.

“My only regret,” Finn said, “is that we didn’t leave something to broadcast the aftermath to us so we could watch the horror unfold.”

“No!” Ben said, a huge smile on his face. “Broadcast it all over the Holo-net! Live stream!”

Rey fell into Ben’s chest laughing. “They’d show up to take over a star system and get laughed right back out!”

“Hey!” Han said, one hand on a bottle of Corellian whiskey. “Can I get a cheer for my son here?”

Finn and Rey lifted Ben’s hands up while he hung his head with a smile, cheeks turning pink. “To the hero!” Finn said.

“To our hero,” Rey echoed.

Han waved the bottle in Ben’s direction. “To _my_ hero!”

“Guys,” Ben said, blushing to the point of turning red but still smiling that wide, proud smile, “stop.”

“No we’re not gonna stop, kid. Now you listen here and cut the modesty shit. You did damn good out there. You saved me, saved us, got us all out of there safely, and made the Final Order’s lives a living hell. _That_ is something to be proud of. I’d take you on a mission any day, son.”

Ben swallowed. “Dad,” he whispered.

“Ah shit, don’t start crying. Here.” He turned a cup in his other hand. “Look at that, grabbed the SOLO cups. Because my son made these. My son with my name for his company. Make your father damn proud. Here.” He plopped the cup down and filled it halfway with the whiskey.

“Agh, Dad! I can’t drink this stuff!”

“You are my son and you are going to get drunk with your old man to celebrate.”

“Dad! I have to protect my brain cells! I need them for all this work.”

“Ah quit being some old granny and drink the damn thing. Hey, didn’t the smartest guy in the galaxy get drunk?”

“Stoban Ikto?”

“Yeah, that friggin guy, I watched that movie about him. Drunk half off his ass, I’m telling you.”

Ben slid his fingers to his comm bracelet and looked down at it.

“Are you fact-checking me?”

“Don’t take it personally, I fact-check everyone—well damn. ‘Stoban often celebrated his victories in the science world by imbibing in Endor-produced liquors.’ Huh. I’ll be damned.”

“So drink up.” Han downed his half a cup in one shot.

Ben sniffed at the cup, swirled it, dipped his finger in it—

“Just do it!”

Ben sighed. “Fine, but next celebration, you have to try my Hyper-Fuel!”

“You keep giving us a reason to celebrate and I will. Drink!”

Ben crumpled his lips before taking a tiny sip he immediately spat back out. “Ack! This tastes like electronics wash, Dad! Argh, it burns—how the hell do you drink this?!”

“You gotta do it fast, kid. Come on down it, one big shot. Do it! Do it!”

Chants of “Do it!” surrounded Ben, even Chewbacca bellowing in with it.

Ben bore a nervous grin. “I finally have peers, now I have to succumb to peer pressure. Oh man…” Ben finally closed his eyes and downed the cup in two gulps. After, he stood, flailed his hands and bleated in disgust.

Han cheered and filled the cup again. “Good job! Have another!”

“What? No!”

One hour later…

“Alls I’m saying,” Ben said, his elbow on the holo-chess table, finger pointing up, “is that if you’re going to process _Sterillium_ into usable ore, you can’t just fire it up at 5000 degrees and start adding the uranium…”

Rey looked at Finn, who rolled his eyes. Ben’s first foray into getting drunk was not at all what they expected.

Ben punched the table. “And what is this bantha-shit about Dor-tex polymers? You produce something with the weakest carbon chains and then try to sell it off as durable? Let me tell you about durable…”

Rey really wished he wouldn’t. But he did. And it went on forever, just like the last three stories of -iums and -ites and molecules.

“Hey,” Ben said, grabbing Finn’s shirt. “Hey-ey-ey-ey.” He rattled Finn back and forth. “Hey listen—”

“I’m listening!” Finn said. “Stop shaking me!”

“Listen! Okay okay, what did they say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into the Mos Eisley cantina?”

“Uh…what?”

Ben snorted. “OH SNaP!” He squeezed his eyes shut and laughed into Finn’s chest.

“I…I don’t get it. Please get off.”

Rey pulled Ben by the collar and he plopped onto her lap. “Hey Rey, hey Rey, hey Rey—”

“What?!”

Ben just looked at her with the dumbest drunk smile she had ever seen. “I like saying hey Rey. It’s fun.”

Rey massaged her temples.

Ben sat up. “Wait…wait…wait.” He put his hands to either side of her face and stared at her with his dark-eyed intensity. “Rey, I have to tell you something.”

She blinked, curious as to what could be gripping him so. “What?”

“Do you know why I forget to eat when I’m working with my rock collection?”

“No, why?”

His lips crumpled into a squiggle. “Because I lost my apatite!” He burst out laughing and fell backwards onto Finn.

Rey shook her head. “I don’t…are these supposed to be jokes?”

Finn looked to Han. “Great idea getting him drunk. No one knows what he’s saying.”

“Ah,” Han waved him off, “let him have his fun. I almost died today. It’s a good day to get drunk.”

Rey snorted. “I take it any day is a good day for you to get drunk.”

Han pointed his whiskey bottle. “You shoosh over there. Nearly got splattered by a turbine. You let me enjoy this, huh? And what’s the problem, he’s having fun, even if we don’t understand a damn of what he’s saying.”

Ben thrust his hands out. “Alright alright, since none of you people know, I’m going to give you the history of the universe, and you can trust me on it, don’t trust anyone else, everyone else is a liar. Okay…okay…okay—”

Chewbacca called out to him.

“What? But don’t you want to hear the history of the universe?” Chewbacca clearly didn’t. “Uncle Chewy, I can’t play holo-chess, I’m too drunk!” After Chewy’s highly vocal response, Ben rolled his eyes. “I’m just going to beat you anyway—” Chewbacca grabbed him by the shirt from across the holo-chess table. “—okay okay!”

Finn scooted off the couch. “I’m getting far away from here.”

Chewbacca sat and turned on the board. Ben just stared at him in a stupor. After the Wookiee made his move, Ben shook his head. “Checkmate.” Chewbacca shouted, blowing the hair out of Ben’s face. “Because! I know what you’re going to do. There are forty-three possible ways this can go and in each one I win.” After another bellow, Ben threw his hands up. “Fine, fine.”

The two continued to take turns, Chewbacca deep in concentration, Ben flopped back on the couch staring at the lights and singing about minerals needing a hero. Ten moves in, Ben said, “Checkmate.”

Chewbacca looked at the board, looked at Ben, then grabbed him by the arms and shook him violently.

“I—told—you!” Ben said between jolts to his body.

Rey grabbed Ben and pulled him away from the big guy’s grasp. “Alright, Chewy, that’s enough. He’s too out of his mind to know you’re about to break his neck.”

“Nah, nah,” Ben said, standing. He stumbled two huge steps to the left and righted himself, clenching his fists. “Nah that’s it, that’s the last straw. Uncle Chewy, I’m-a kick your ass this time! Come on. Come at me. Gonna take this shit—”

Chewbacca leapt up and hauled a screaming Ben over his head.

Rey massaged her temples once more. “Chewy! Put him down!”

The second Chewbacca set Ben back on his feet, Ben swung his fist, but he overshot the strike and just bumped Chewbacca’s arm with his own. The big guy responded by putting Ben in a headlock.

“Quit it Uncle Chewy,” Ben squeaked. “Oh shit, you need a shower!” He got a punch to the gut for that one.

“ENOUGH!” Rey said, pointing. “Let him go, now!” Chewbacca groaned and shoved Ben out of his arms.

Ben stumbled, righted himself, and balled his fists again. “Nah Rey, nah, I gotta get him this time. Gonna…gonna…kick his ass!” Ben took one step and fell to the floor.

#

Ben, supported by Chewbacca and Finn on either side, was led/dragged to his bunk while Rey supervised. Han just sat back laughing, hooting about his son and how proud he was. The two men stood Ben before his bunk. Ben pointed, about to say something, when Chewbacca shoved him into the bed.

Ben’s booted feet dangled off the side of the bed. Rey sighed and unbuckled the straps holding them on. She pulled hard and yanked them off, marveling at just how big those suckers were.

“Do I have feet now?” Ben asked.

“Yes, your boots are off.”

He pulled his legs into the bed. “Rey, come here, I want to ask you something.”

She stepped closer. “What—” She squealed as he yanked her into the bunk with him. She didn’t normally let anyone manhandle her, but as he pulled her into his arms, she couldn’t help but let herself go. His huge body felt so good, his hips pressed against hers and feeling wayyy too delightful.

“I love you sooooo much, Rey,” he said with his whisky-laden breath. His eyes were swimming in a stupor, but they were still just as dark and adorable as always. His dopey little smile tickled her heart.

“You do, huh?”

“Yep.” He pulled her hard against his chest and rested his chin on top of her head. “I’m gonna marry you one day and we’ll have like four kids, but it’s okay! I know pirate women don’t like kids but my mom will help us take care of them. She said she always wanted to have more kids, but she said I was so big I ruined her forever, but I think it was because I was so annoying, so she’ll be happy because she gets to be with kids again so you don’t have to give up the pillaging and pirating, except I can’t really go but maybe you can be a pirate on my space station?”

What a spew of words. But they hit her in a spot that simmered raw and biting under her surface. She couldn’t find a response.

Ben pulled back to look her in the eyes. “What’s wrong? Is that too many kids?”

The truth would come out eventually. “Ben I have to tell you something.”

“I love you?”

Rey stared at him, heart aching. This wasn’t the time. Not like this. “Exactly.”

He melted into a huge smile that turned that face even more precious. Then he attacked her mouth with a kiss of raw passion tasting of liquor, a massive beast just devouring her. Her body sparked in response, ready to let him do everything and anything to her. Warm and aching, she drew a leg up over his hip and arched up against him.

He growled out of her kiss and snarled into her neck, nibbling and lapping like a hound. “Oh Rey, do you know what I would do to you right now if I wasn’t so drunk?”

Rey raked her fingernails up his back. “Tell me.”

“I don’t know but it would last about a minute.” He buried his laugh in between her breasts.

“Well let’s hope for better, huh?” She pushed his face back as he had been mouthing at her shirt, not actually on her body but just slobbering on the fabric. “Why don’t you show me what you’d do?”

Ben grinned, his eyes so hazy and out of it. He slipped down, bit the end of her shirt, and pulled it up, baring her stomach. He peppered soft, hot little kisses on her skin. “I would start right here, just like this.”

Rey pulled her shirt up higher. “And?”

“Aaaaaand…I have no idea!” He laughed into her stomach, making a noise that made him laugh even harder.

This was getting just plain silly. She regretted having ripped off his bunk door the night before. She really could have used the privacy. Instead, she locked the bunk room using the Force. Finn would have to fend for himself until she was done.

Rey sat up. “How about I teach you how to pleasure me?”

The smile dropped from Ben’s face. “Oh shit.” He bit his lip, eyes roving her with anticipation.

Rey slid off her shirt while Ben’s breaths picked up. Then she unhooked her bra and tossed that to the side. She was pretty sure Ben short-circuited again. “Breathe!”

A hefty breath yanked into his chest, his eyes moving once again, lasering in on her breasts as she lay next to him once again. She grabbed one of his hands and placed it on one breast while pressing the other to his mouth. “You remember how I showed you with your hand, now see what you can do with your lips and tongue.”

That enormous hand of his dwarfed her and felt so warm and comforting, teasing at her sensitive peaks. Then that big, hot mouth cupped right over her, his tongue sliding and delighting before he took her softness in a deep suckle.

“Yes,” she whispered, “just like that. You’re so sweet and gentle, so perfect.” She watched him as he moved. His eyes were closed, basking in his own pleasure. She stroked his hair and all the tension melted from his forehead.

His hand dropped from her breast. Tongue stopped.

Oh no. “Ben?”

A little snore crept from his nose, his mouth still engulfing her breast.

“You are shitting me. You are fucking shitting me.” She shoved his shoulder. “Ben! Wake up! Don’t leave me like this.”

Ben just popped off her breast and fell over onto his back. That was it. He was out.

Rey gripped his hair and breathed into his neck. “Ben, in whatever dreamland you’re in right now, hear me and hear me well. The next time I have my top off, you had better make me scream and beg for more, you hear me?” She dipped her head in frustration onto his chest and inhaled all the way to her toes. Oh he smelled so good, still full of the scents of exertion and the battle, heavy with pheromones that dug right into her deepest regions.

With a growl, she sat up, pulled the blanket over him and crawled into her own bunk. She shut her door and unlocked the one to the room to let Finn in. There, in her own private space, she could focus on Ben’s scent, his big warm body, and his sloppy drunk kisses to finish off for herself what Ben started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I realize Ben's terrible drunken jokes require the English language, which is probably not in a galaxy far far away, but seriously, try looking up geology jokes. Yeah, see what I mean? That "apatite" one was especially bad, but at least the gemstone version is quite pretty https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Apatite_taill%C3%A9e.jpg
> 
> Also, please try not to scream in frustration over poor Rey being left hanging LOL! I promise they will dance upon the mattress, but there's a reason I'm holding off just a bit (plot based sex, whaaaat?) Until then, all the tension are belong to them. 
> 
> Off to Kef Bir to get that elusive Wayfinder. Will there be a splashing battle upon the remains of the Death Star? Will Ben make a mess of it? Well, we know the answer to the second question for sure...


	10. Hangovers and Horn Horses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, seriously, it's just an orbak. Come out from behind Rey.
> 
> On the way to Kef Bir, Ben recovers from his hangover and learns a little more about Kylo. But with Galacticon already starting, he wonders if they can destroy Palpatine in time to make it to the con. Once landed on Kef Bir, Ben tries an unique way to appease the locals.
> 
>   
>    
> 

Rey woke the next morning and looked over to Ben’s bunk. He was still unconscious, arm dangling over the edge, drooling on his pillow. On anyone else it would have been a complete turnoff, but still he charmed her even at his worst.

He was not going to enjoy his hangover when he woke.

_Did you really think that was funny?_ Kylo’s shadowy voice filled her head. _Your little gang disabled my entire ship. The Storm Troopers are out of control, and Med-bay is predicting an abhorrent number of pregnancies!_

Rey rolled her eyes. _Awfully early to be annoying me, Kylo. What’s the matter? Too afraid to show your face to me after what I did to you?_

_I can’t project to you anymore. I already tried._

_That’s because Ben is getting stronger, ironically, thanks to you pushing him, so you kind of brought this on yourself._

_Is your precious little boyfriend listening in?_

_He’s still asleep. What do you want?_

_You are all going to pay for what you’ve done. I won’t let this go._

_Oh come on, you telling me you didn’t enjoy a good spank in Med-bay after watching all that?_

_I’m still recovering from that coward’s low blow, thank you very much. Why Rey? Why did you choose him over me? Just because he’s your true dyad? I know more about you than he ever will. I’m the only one that will ever understand you._

_Kylo, you’re attractive, but I don’t love you, and I don’t want to be with you romantically. We’ve been over this._

_He looks just like me. What is the difference?_

_His soul! His heart! Being with him lifts me out of who I thought I was and lets me be who I really am. He’s everything I never believed to be real, and I just…I love him, Kylo. The end._

_So you’re in love with the Light, is that it?_

_I’m in love with_ him _. He just happens to be full of Light._

_And what will you do when he finds out your little secret? What we share? Will he love you when he knows the truth about us?_

_Kylo, if you say a word to him, I’ll make you suffer in ways you cannot imagine. I’ve done it before, I’ll do it again. DON’T TEST ME!_

_This little relationship of yours is a dream you can only have for so long. And you can forget about that Wayfinder. The only way you are going to Exegol is with me._ We _will go before Palpatine, not you and the coward._

_That_ coward _dove into a turbine shaft to save his father, kicked your ass, and decimated your ship. Stay out of our way._

Rey shut down the connection. Kylo just didn’t get it, wouldn’t get it, and honestly, it wasn’t really his fault. As attracted as she had been to him, she couldn’t love him. Care about him, yes; that was the worst part of it all. She wished she didn’t care about him. But he was right, they shared in something only the other would understand.

And both had to deal with Palpatine’s crap head on.

But Kylo was no different from anyone else she’d ever known. And he was so shut down, his emotions a flatline except for the acceptable rage and anger. She felt just as miserable with him as she did everyone else.

Not like with Ben, whose gentleness, kindness, and compassion were a miracle to behold. Being with him made her feel like a new person, like her life meant something, and all the suffering she had endured was worth it if she wound up with him in the end.

Ben revived her heart whereas Kylo could only keep it barely existing. And there was no way to explain that to someone who’d never known what love was, or kindness, or mercy.

She honestly wished Kylo could find his own version of Ben. Even as she stared at him now, her heart just pulsed with vibrance, that warm flutter of adoration. He was just so sweet and adorable as could be and so completely open with his heart.

Something he trusted her with and was so incredibly valuable and fragile. It killed her to know one day she would probably break it through no real fault of her own.

A long, wavering moan poured out of him, a hefty blend of agony and exhaustion.

Rey smiled. “How’s my hungover little darling?”

“My brain is ow.”

“Awww, well let me go fix you my best hangover cure. Spend enough time with pirates and you learn all the good stuff. Not to mention having to use a few cures myself.”

“Were these cures peer reviewed by top physicians in their field?”

Rey sighed. “No, but they kept pirates for blowing each other’s heads off, and that’s good enough for me.” She patted his arm. “Sit tight.”

#

Ben gazed in misery, his tangled locks of hair hanging in his face as he sat up in the bunk, steaming cup in his hand. His head throbbed and felt like bees took up residence in there. “Why does anyone drink when you just wind up like this?”

Rey shrugged as she brushed her hair. “It’s fun while it lasts.”

“I hope I still have enough brain cells. Tell me if this makes sense to you: Helicase and topoisomerase II are required to unwind DNA from a double-strand structure to a single-strand structure to facilitate replication of each strand consistent with the semiconservative model of DNA replication.”

Rey just stared at him. “What?”

“Helicase—”

“It makes perfect sense. Definitely. Just…don’t repeat that. Please. I don’t need you summoning a demon.”

“Just making sure I remembered what I was studying recently. Thinking of getting another PhD, this time in biology to just kind of round it all out, you know? Just been so busy—hey, why did you say I’d be summoning a demon? Does it have to do with that Sith cloning?”

Rey’s eye twitched. “No, I just meant it sounds like you’re speaking in some kind of ancient evil language.”

Ben perked, even if his head still disagreed with being awake. “How much do you know of the cloning they did? I mean, you said they got my DNA, so it has to be a mix of science and Force somehow. Physically cloning can be done, even if the Galactic Senate has rules against it, but why introduce the Force into it? Is that needed to make someone Force sensitive?”

“I honestly don’t know the details. Not even sure I want to know. Nothing good ever came out of there…trust me.”

“Still would love to get my hands on the research though.” He rubbed at the stubble on his chin. “Is Kylo anything like me? You seem to know him pretty well.”

“Known him since we were sixteen. And no, he’s nothing like you. And before you ask, no, we really didn’t date. We…sort of tried while Palpatine was trying to form the dyad, but…” She shook her head. “He can’t love, not in the way that you do. Not right now. Not the way he is. He’s a mess; he can’t handle a relationship.” She smiled at him. “He could never make me feel even a fraction of the way you make me feel. He could never love like you.”

Ben smiled back. He loved how her face just lit up when she smiled, like a jewel. Then he frowned, thinking. “I’d think he’d be more like me since we share the same DNA, intelligent, maybe even scared of everything.”

“He’s…” Rey sat at the edge of her bunk across from him. “Ben you have to understand some things about him. He wasn’t raised by Han and Leia like you were. I mean, your dad can be a jerk, but I know he’s always loved you, even when he…”

Ben shook his head. “I’m over it. He probably _was_ drunk off his ass, but even if he found out I wasn’t…I think he still would have loved me anyway. Maybe he’d be relieved that his genetics didn’t create someone like me—”

“Ben, don’t do that! You are great just as you are.”

“I just…like to think he’d still love me anyway. I wasn’t so sure before yesterday, but after we talked, really talked for the first time…I think that’s the first time he really saw me for me, and maybe I saw him, the man beneath the gruff exterior. He hurt me with what he did, but we’ve grown closer than we’ve ever been. I’ve already forgiven him.”

Rey sighed and looked at him with such a mix of sadness and adoration. “That, right there. That’s what I mean. Your heart is just so huge…so easy to hurt but so open and loving. That’s what Kylo can’t comprehend, not in himself or in others, and that’s why I couldn’t fall for him. I can’t be with someone who makes me feel just as dead inside as I already feel. But like I was saying, it’s not really his fault.

“He was created in a Sith lab and raised by a cultist named Snoke. Trust me, none of these people were capable of being doting, nurturing parents. He had only known pain and suffering as a staple of life. Even living on a ship full of pirates, I still had a hell of a better life than he did. They raised him to focus solely on his Dark Side training. He wasn’t allowed to feel pain or cry, not allowed to show any emotion but anger, and this was praised and encouraged. At a young age he had to learn to kill, and when Palpatine felt the time was right, he ordered Kylo to kill Snoke.”

“The man who raised him?”

“Indeed. Snoke was never the loving type, of course, pretty much a manipulative scumbag, or so I hear. But he was the only parent Kylo had ever known, and Kylo wasn’t given a choice in the matter. He told me how Palpatine tortured him, threatened him with death, everything to just push Kylo to the full Dark Side. The sad thing is, I don’t think he wants to be how he is. Sometimes we would talk, and he’d try to tell me how much he didn’t want all this, then injure himself for being pulled to the light.”

Ben rubbed his arms. “That’s horrible…and in some ways frightening. It’s like looking at what I could have become if…”

“The more we talked though, the more I realized there was a very human side in Kylo, one he doesn’t get to exhibit. But he’s too afraid to leave Palpatine’s influence. He doesn’t know any world outside the Sith. He’s barely clinging onto a sense of purpose after the dyad failed. At this point, he’s just hoping to do a good job as Supreme Leader because otherwise his existence is meaningless and Palpatine will have no problem ending his life because of it. He’s angry, terrified, and trapped, and yes, he’s a giant dick, but not a lot of it is by choice.”

Ben rubbed his still aching but mending head. “Damn…I mean, I was so angry at him for trying to kill my dad, kill me, hurt you, now I just feel bad for him.”

“Honestly, I do too, BUT! You can’t let that cloud your actions. If we meet him again, he will try to kill you. He’ll do anything to achieve that goal. If you have to kill him to save your life or someone else’s, do it. Honestly, it’s the ending he expects anyway.” Her eyes grew distant, and she looked away. “Might even be doing him a favor.”

Ben didn’t understand how anyone could think that was a favor, but something so heavy came over her that he didn’t want to press her. “Okay, if you say so.” He stood and still felt awful but definitely getting better. “Well, I really should start the processing on the Tor-flex, especially to have it ready before we face Palpatine. Now that I have the voxorium, the rest should be a breeze.” He groaned and rubbed his head again. “If I survive this hangover anyway. I am so never drinking again.”

“Considering you tried to fight Chewy, yeah, probably not a good idea.”

“Ohhhh, that explains all the bruises.”

“You…forgot a lot about last night, didn’t you?”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Oh stars, what did I do?”

Rey smiled. “Nothing bad. Actually, things were getting kind of good until you passed out.”

Ben pressed his lips together. “Precisely how good?”

Rey stood, placed her hand behind his neck, and pulled him down for a kiss that just devoured his mouth and sparked instant and unrecoverable desire. Then she left his lips, patted his cheek, and looked down at his already full grown response.

She pointed at it. “Imagine me left with that.” She slid her finger into her mouth in such a way he actually shuddered from the primal awakening in him. When she popped it out of her mouth, she touched his lips. “Next time you better finish what you start.”

Ben stuck his finger up. “Can I finish now?”

“Nope.”

Rey walked off, swinging her rear from side to side, far more than she’d usually use for simple walking. Ben grunted from the hefty welling of aching need and adjusted himself. “I am never drinking again.”

#

“You did not,” Han said in the lounge.

Rey laughed and downed another shot. Corellian whiskey wasn’t so bad. She couldn’t figure out how Ben got drunk on so little. “I’m telling you! I looked Rotta the Hutt right in the face, my lightsaber pointed at his gut, and told him if he ever sent another bounty hunter after me, I’d personally slice him open and roast him for his entire organization to feast upon. Then I made him give _me_ what he was going to pay the bounty hunter, you know, after I dropped the guy’s head on the floor.”

Han leaned forward. “You robbed Rotta the Hutt’s sail-barge and then made him pay you after the fact?”

“Oh, well Shirac and the crew helped, of course. But I got most of the spoils that day. Shirac said he never saw Rotta looks so pale and sticky in his life.”

Han threw his hands up. “Hutts don’t forgive and forget! He could still be hunting you right now!”

Rey shook her head, smile at the tip of her SOLO cup. “Oh he’s not coming after me. He knows better. He was only going to make that mistake once.”

Han turned to Chewbacca. “Next job, she’s coming with us.”

“And Ben.”

Han grinned. “Maybe Ben could rig a salt trap and make that sucker shrink into a pile of goo.”

“Rey!” Ben called. He charged into the lounge with a barrel-like container in his arms. “Can I borrow you in the cargo hold? Oh, and everyone else, stay out of the airlock! I’m cooking.”

Han huffed. “Right! Airlocks, cooking, do I want to know?”

“I’m processing the Tor-flex material now that we have the voxorium.”

Finn sat up from the couch. “The sperm-murderer?”

Ben groaned. “Only in its pure form! Once it drops an electron to the torillium and bonds with carbon, it’s completely harmless.”

“Yeah, you just keep your nad-stabber to yourself.”

“Maybe I will! Come on Rey, we have a lot of work to do.”

Rey shrugged, downed the rest of her drink, and followed Ben.

#

Rey watched as Ben climbed up to the top of a cube bigger than him. He set the barrel into the top, turned it, and pulled down a lever.

“There,” Ben said and climbed back down. It was an odd mechanism. Metal walls surrounded the cube except for the front glass panel. The bottom was filled with a metallic liquid. “Once the raw material is set in at the top, we can get the rest processing.”

“Exactly what are we doing here?”

Ben picked up his holopad and tapped at the expanding projections. “I was already processing the polymer for the Darth Vader cosplay, but now that I have the Tor-flex going, I figured I better do something with what I have. I expanded the armor concept so it would be more protective than decorative. I also designed some indestructible stuff for my mom because I promised. Watch.” With another tap, the chamber lit up. The liquid metal sprung to life and formed into various shapes. “I create the 3D molds on the holopad, then the strevium liquid responds to the lasers inside the unit and forms the mold. You see that lever there on the left? I want you to do the honor of pulling it.”

She wasn’t sure how much of an honor it was to pull a lever, but knew it meant a lot to him. She shoved it all the way down and watched as a black liquid poured into the unit, disappearing into the molds.

Ben set his holopad down and put his arm around her. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

Rey had no idea. “It sure is.”

He sprung in excitement and made her jump. “Now! Here’s what I really needed you for. Step over here inside this frame.”

It was a simple cube of thin pipes, open on all sides. “I’m going to go ahead and trust you in…whatever this is.”

Ben picked up his holopad. “It’s just a scanning system. Can you take off your armor? Actually, let’s do one without and one with so I can replicate it.”

“Um, why?”

He looked up. “For the Tor-flex. I need your measurements.” He grinned. “Then comes the fun part.”

Rey sucked in a nice, slow breath and took off her belts and armor. She stood inside the cube and waited as bars slid up and down the sides, overhead, and beneath the clear floor panel. “Good?”

“Yep, now with the armor, anything you want to replicate, go ahead and put it on.”

She repeated the process and waited for the fun part. “So, what next?”

“Now I want you to dig around on the Holo-net and find whatever outfit you want. Anything. Whatever you want your new suit to look like. I’ll make you anything you want, any color. Just make sure it covers as much of you as possible.” His cheeks reddened. “Don’t get me wrong, I love seeing your skin, so warm and bronze-y.” He tipped his head forward. “But you know what else loves your skin? Injuries! So pick what you like, and send me the picture. I’ll make you as pretty or scary as you want to be.”

Rey shrugged. “Why not both?”

Ben smiled. “Just how I like you.”

“And what about you? What sort of fantastical array of armor and gear shall you be sporting?”

Ben pointed to his long sleeved black shirt. “Uh, pretty much this.”

Rey’s eye twitched. “With all you can do with this, that’s what you’re going to create?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I?”

“Ben, is that one set of shirt and pants the only articles of clothing you own?”

“Oh no, I have a lot more of these.”

“Wait, wait…wait. You have replicas of the same outfit? That’s all you have? Just the same shirt and same pants throughout your wardrobe?”

“No, don’t be silly! I have that tank top too.”

“…Uh huh.”

“Well, I _do_ have a Day Havvens Vader shirt, but I only wear that to the electronics store where I know my parents won’t see me. I just put it right on top of the black shirt.”

“Can I, um, ask why you only own one style of clothing?”

Ben shrugged as he tapped at his holopad. “Too confusing. I used to spend a half hour deciding between two shirts just to have someone throw an egg at it by the end of the day, anyway. It’s one less thing I have to worry about.”

Rey hopped onto a crate. “Well, when this is all over, I’m going to swipe—I mean buy you a few new shirts, just to change it up, give you a little variety. I’ll even pick them out in the morning for you so you don’t have to worry that busy big brain of yours with such a task.”

He smiled, his cheeks turning that sweet shade of pink. “You’d do that for me? Take care of me like that?”

“I think the more I get to know you, the more I realize you are extremely capable, just not in the way everyone expects. It’s a minor thing to pick out a shirt for you, considering the incredible things I’ve seen you do on this trip.” His big brown eyes met hers, and it was still amazing how he could make her melt with just one sweet, innocent look. She leaned her chin on her hand. “It’s odd in a way. I’ve spent my whole life only taking care of myself, and then I meet you and realize I kind of enjoy taking care of someone else for a change. Someone who deserves it, and someone who appreciates it. You’re just so darn cute, I can’t resist.”

He smiled and laughed softly, so bashful beneath those swirls of black hair hanging in his face. “Stars…Rey. Every time I think I couldn’t love you more, you find a deeper well in me.” His eyes lingered on her, so soft and angelic. He didn’t have to say a word. She could feel his love for her in his expressive eyes alone. Then he glanced at his holopad. “I…really have to finish my scan real quick before I shut the software down.” Those midnight eyes lit on her again. “But we can always continue this conversation after.”

Rey stretched out on the crate and propped her head up on an elbow. “Perhaps we will.”

He set down his holopad and pulled off his shirt. She had only seen him like this once before, during a bit of a…cleanup. Now that he wasn’t so focused on his embarrassment, she could watch those muscles move freely beneath his skin.

She smiled as she admired every line and curve of that broad body of his. “I don’t see why you wear a shirt at all. Bare skin suits you just fine.”

He giggled, and pink splotches traced down his neck to his upper chest. He stood in the scanning mechanism with his arms out and eyes closed. “I could say the same about you.”

She watched as the red scanner line traced up and down that body, bright against his pale skin, disappearing into his black pants. “You can lose the pants too if you feel it would give you a better scan.”

Ben opened one eye and gave her the most crooked grin. “Um…really?”

Rey sat up with her legs wide apart on the crate and rested her elbows on them. “Do it.”

Ben narrowed his eyes just a little, corners of his mouth still turned up. His hands reached down, grasped the clasp of his belt, and slid the end out of the loops. Those big hands worked slowly and with purpose. Yes, he could already tell what she liked. Then came the button, next the zipper, before the trappings of those pants fell to the floor. Hidden beneath this entire time were muscular, shapely legs with just the right amount of meat on them. Black underwear kept his prize package hidden but curvaceous and full.

Rey leaned forward and sighed. “Why do you ever put clothes on at all?”

Ben grinned. “You think I should go full Ar-Bar the Mighty? Just go around with a pair of underpants and belts on my bare chest?”

“Totally, furry undies and everything. Look at you, hiding beneath all that black all the time. Do you even know how beautiful you are?”

That luscious pink sprung up again on his face and neck. “I know how beautiful _you_ are.”

“Yeah? Why don’t you show me?”

Ben stepped out of his fallen pants and with tentative footfalls made his way closer. She could almost smell him within five feet of her, or maybe it was the memory of his deep earthy scent as she buried her face in his shirt. Didn’t matter, it drove her wild nonetheless—

Finn charged into the doorway. “We training today or what—”

“YOU HAVE THE WORST TIMING!” Rey roared.

Finn leapt into the air, and when he landed, he got a load of a nearly naked Ben. “Oh…wow. Hi.”

Ben waved his hand. “Hey.”

Finn tipped his head over to Rey. “Seriously, lock a door every now and then.”

Rey clenched her fist. “I’m going to lock you upside the head if you don’t get out of here!”

“Well, not to be the galaxy’s biggest cockblock, but we reach Kef Bir by tomorrow morning, and we don’t know what we’re going to be facing down there. Don’t get me wrong, he got us off the Destroyer in the best way possible, but before that he was in big trouble. He needs to train, and before you slice my throat open and drink my blood, you know I’m right.”

Rey groaned and rubbed her face in frustration while fully knowing her friend was right.

Ben shrugged. “For the record, I have no idea whether he’s right or not.”

Rey sighed, massaging her brow. “He is.”

“Statistically, I’d say there’s only a forty percent chance he’s—”

Rey hopped off the crate. “Better put on your pants and belt up. We have to be ready for anything.”

Ben clenched his fists as well as his teeth. He stuck his finger in Finn’s face and shook it. “You!” With nothing else to say or do, he stomped over to get his pants.

Finn crossed his arms and sighed. “You’ll thank me in the morning—”

“NO I WON’T!”

#

Later that evening, after a grueling training session with a semi-rigid underparts problem, Ben showered and released his overwhelming frustration, the end result leaving teeth marks in his arm from having to silence his own scream. Finn said Ben did really well during that training, fighting with an aggressiveness he’d been missing the entire time.

Of course. All Ben could think about was pummeling Finn for that interruption. Then again, maybe his friend did him a favor. The last thing he needed was to explode after being touched by Rey for a third time.

After dinner, Ben pulled Han aside. “Dad, can I talk to you somewhere private?”

Han sighed. “How much whiskey am I gonna need this time?”

“It’s not bad. Not really. I hope not.”

Han nodded and grabbed two cups and a fresh bottle. “Just in case we need it. Cockpit, I’ll shut the door behind us.”

Once the sliding door sealed behind them, Ben sat in the copilot’s seat. He hadn’t been afforded that privilege since his father tried to teach him to fly the ship. First and last time. Took six months before the Falcon would fly again after that venture.

Han slid him a cup and tried to fill it. Ben shook his head and pulled a bottle of Hyper-Fuel from his pocket instead. Han rolled his eyes and poured himself a good amount.

“Alright kid, what kind of heart attack should I have tonight?”

Ben let out a slow breath through puffed cheeks. “Look, just…before I say anything, just promise you won’t make fun of me. Just this once, please just promise me that.”

Han sat back and crossed his leg on his knee. “Alright, you have my word. What’s going on?”

“Dad…I…need to know how to…please a woman.”

Han stared at him for just a moment before clasping his hands together and looking up at the ceiling. “Thank the stars, the Force, and everything in existence—”

“Dad! You promised!”

“I’m not making fun! I’m fucking grateful we’re getting to this point—wait, are you almost there or did you try and fail?”

“Dad!”

“I need to know! Are we doing preparation or restoration?”

“Preparation.”

Han stroked his chin. “Okay, good…gooood.”

“The thing is, I’ve looked up the mechanics, looked up a lot of stuff, _watched_ a lot of stuff if you get my meaning, but it’s all overwhelming, too much. I don’t know what to do and I don’t want to fuck it up. I’ve already done plenty of that.”

“Oh?”

Ben hung his head in his hands. “Ohhhh I can’t believe I’m about to say this to anyone, especially you.”

“Come on, kid. I’m your father, you can tell me anything.”

Ben curled his hands into fists and pressed them against his forehead. “The first time she touched my dick I came in three strokes. She wasn’t even inside my pants.”

Han said nothing, but he downed his drink in one shot.

“The next time she was touching me, full contact, I held out longer, but it was still less than a minute before I had to start reciting calculus formulas in order to stave it off—”

“Wait, you what?”

“Math calms me down!”

Han rubbed his hand over his face. “Well first lesson, don’t do math during sex.”

“Well what the hell am I supposed to do? She’s so…so beautiful, feels so good, smells so good…” He closed his eyes.

“You got this same problem with Sexbot?”

“DAD! You promised!”

“And I’m not poking fun! But I’m not stupid either. Do you have this same problem when you’re _not_ with Rey?”

Ben ran through his list of “experiences.” “No…no I don’t.”

“Alright, well that makes this easier. Alright first, drop whatever you learned from porn.”

“I don’t watch—”

“Oh yeah, you found those channels by accident when we bombarded the Final Order, nice try. Look, just listen…”

Ben had to admit, this was a conversation he never expected to have with his father but was glad he did. It didn’t refute his research but gave it depth and cohesiveness. He was almost tempted to write a dissertation on the topic.

“Now come here,” Han said, leading him through the Falcon. They stepped into one of the lesser used storage rooms. Han pulled a panel from the wall, revealing a scanning and keypunch mechanism. He scanned his thumb, tapped a few buttons, and waved Ben over. “Come here. Stick your finger here.” Ben obliged and stepped back. After a few more taps, Han waved him back. “Alright, press there again.”

Ben scanned his thumb once more and the panels in the wall separated. He stepped back and watched as a bedroom emerged. The bed was big enough for two of his giant selves, and the lighting was just the right mood level. “Dad! I didn’t know you had this in here!”

“This was Lando’s ship at one time, remember? I don’t even want to know how many women he had in here. Hell, _you_ don’t want to know how many women _I_ had in here before I met your mother.”

“You’re right, I don’t.”

“Hell, you were conceived in here—”

“Ew! Dad! No!”

“Yeah yeah, well look. When the time is right, don’t go trying to squeeze in those tiny ass bunks. You come in here and treat her right. It’s nice and private and _don’t tell anyone_ about it. It’s our little secret. But anything you need, it’s there.”

Ben pointed to the mirrored ball on the ceiling. “What the heck is that thing?”

“Eh, they call it a disco ball. Popular in the late BBY’s. This is the switch that turns it on. Girls love it for some reason.”

“Huh. Okay.” He turned to his father. “Thanks, Dad. I felt like an asshole asking you about any of this, but I’m glad I did.”

Han patted him on the back. “Of course, son. I’m glad you came to me. I’m glad we’re almost finally at this point! Once my son gets laid, I can feel like I did my job as a father.” He turned from the room.

“How does that of all things make you feel like you did your job?”

“Have a son one day, you’ll understand.”

Ben stepped out of the kinky room and shut the door, wondering how Rey felt about having four kids and feeling like he may have asked her at one point. He shook his head, glad he wasn’t crazy enough to do something like that. Had to have been a dream.

#

Seeing as his mind was already fully in the gutter, Ben sought Rey to see if they could rekindle the little bit of fun they almost had earlier in the day. She wasn’t in the usual haunts, and it surprised him when he found her already lying down in her bunk, back turned toward the opening.

“Hey,” he whispered, trying not to wake her if she was asleep.

“Hey,” came her response.

“You okay?”

She shifted. “Just tired. The training wore me out a little.”

“Oh, okay.” Damn, probably not a good time to kiss her neck.

“Ben, lie next to me.”

Well he wasn’t about to refuse that. He climbed into her bunk, giving her plenty of cautious space.

“Hold me.”

Ben slid in closer and wrapped his arm around her. She nestled in against him, pressing her body along the length of his, and curled under his arm. Desire was his first response as that round little rear of hers fit right into the curve of his pelvis, and the conversation with his father already had him hot and bothered. But that fizzled when he sensed something along their bond, something that needed his comfort more than anything.

“Rey, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, just tired.” She sighed. “This feels so good, you holding me like this. I could go to bed every night like this and wake up every morning to it.”

Ben smiled and pressed his mouth into her hair. “I would love that. Love you.”

“Love you too, Ben.”

She fell silent, and that perfect comfort of having her in his arms quelled the desire of before. Just holding her in his arms like this meant everything. He kissed her head and breathed into her fluffy brown waves.

“Ben?”

“Yeah, Rey?”

“No matter what happens, I’ve lived more in this brief time we’ve been together than my entire life. You’ve given me a life I’ve never had before, and you are life’s true magic.”

“Oh Rey…” he whispered into her hair. “You have been and will always be my everything, now and in the rest of our long, long lives together.” He held her closer. “Don’t be afraid. I won’t let Palpatine end something this beautiful. This, you and me, this is meant to endure, to blow past that mess. You and I will be the proof that love can conquer all.”

Her body shook as she wept in his arms.

“Shhhhh,” he whispered, nuzzling her neck. “I’m here. I’ll always be here. Right beside you. Forever.”

“Ben…” She sucked in a sob and kept crying.

“Our dyad has proclaimed, right? Two as one. I’ll never leave your side. Never for any reason, that’s my promise to you.”

No matter what he said, she just kept crying harder. He wondered for a moment if he was saying something wrong, he was really good at that. But she kept gripping his arm, wrapping herself deeper, pushing against him as if she could never get close enough. She wasn’t rejecting him, so that was a good sign. But he couldn’t figure out what was hurting her so much. Or maybe it was the joy of knowing, after the lonely and hard life she lived, someone would be there for her through everything, no matter what. Someone who loved her for everything she was.

She said nothing else, only drifted to sleep in his arms. That was fine. The best he ever slept was the other night in her arms. He could brush his teeth in the morning. For now, he never wanted to let her go.

#

The next morning, Ben stood looking at approaching Kef Bir in the viewport. He had a duty. Destiny had called upon him to fulfill a role in the galaxy’s fate. For the countless beings on countless worlds, for his family, for Rey, he had to step up and do what needed to be done.

If only the timing wasn’t so awful.

Rey stepped beside him and put her hand on his arm. “Are you okay? You’re a bit somber this morning.”

Ben sighed. “With the way things are going, I’m probably going to miss Galacticon.”

“Well, nothing’s certain. We may get done in time.”

“I don’t know. It’s already started and runs for four days. With the way things have gone so far, getting sidetracked with the whole Destroyer thing, I don’t think I’m going to make it.”

“There’s always next year, right?”

“Yeah, but Day Havvens isn’t doing the con circuit anymore after this one. This is my only chance to get my Vader cosplay autographed.”

“Oh…” She took his hand. “I’m sorry, Ben. I know how much you were looking forward to that.”

He was glad someone understood him and didn’t poke fun. “I know I sound ridiculous. We’re facing death and I’m whining over an autograph from a guy who played my grandfather in a movie.”

“Well it…truly means something to you. I don’t doubt you’ve experienced plenty of disappointment in your life. I’m sorry to have added one more.”

“Oh no, Rey, don’t be sorry. I’d never trade this for anything, being here with you, being beside you, no matter what fate may lie ahead.” Ben smiled and took her hands. “Rey, I’d rather be staring into the face of death with you than have a VIP backstage pass to Galacticon.”

Rey chuckled. “Oh Ben, I don’t think anyone but me can truly understand the beautiful depth of that statement.”

#

The crew stepped onto the grassy soil of Kef Bir and took in the landscape. Gray, misty, and faintly cool with the ominous skeleton of the Death Star on the horizon.

Ben grinned. “I’m totally taking pieces home for my collection.”

Han sunk in exasperation. “That thing destroyed your mother’s home planet, her parents, and everyone on it.”

“Fine, then I won’t tell her where it’s from!”

“The Prince of Alderaan with a Death Star collection and Darth Vader costume. If you had a crown, I’d tell you to turn it in.”

Rey paused. “Prince of Alderaan? That’s right, you’re royalty, aren’t you?”

Ben scratched his head. “Well…sort of. Kind of doesn’t really matter at this point. There are a few Alderaan settlements, but they have their own government now. Just a leftover from a bygone era.”

Finn patted Rey’s shoulder. “A pirate and a prince. A match made in heaven.”

Rey grinned. “I’d love to see you in royal getup. Might be pretty hot.” She slid her finger along Ben’s jawline.

Ben sighed and adjusted his gear belts. “You mean hot as in sweaty, and sounds kind of itchy to me. Do they put tags on royal clothing?”

Han rolled his eyes. “Wouldn’t know. Your mother says my throne is in the bathroom, that’s about all I know of royalty. Come on, sooner we get off this planet the better. That damn thing is giving me the creeps.”

Finn shook his head. “That water looks vicious. How are we going to get over there?”

Chewbacca called out and Ben groaned. “But I didn’t bring my bathing suit!”

Han sighed. “Your bathing suit is long black pants and a long black shirt, what difference does it make?”

“This material gets itchy when it’s wet!”

“Everything is itchy to you—”

Rey growled and put her fingers to her temples. “Forget it! We couldn’t swim that and survive. Any way to hover the Falcon over and we can drop from above?”

“Eh, it’s possible but precarious, and with those waves out there, I couldn’t go too low. Would be difficult getting down there and back on again.”

Ben said, “I could use the SOLO-chute and the boot rockets. Not sure how well they stand up to water though, I haven’t tested that yet.”

Rey shook her head. “I’m the one that has to go in there. The emperor’s throne-room switch will respond to me—” She turned and drew both her guns, pointing into empty space. “We’re not alone.”

Ben reached for his holster and remembered that was a lost cause. Then he felt it, the ground rumbling in rhythmic beats. He wasn’t sure what to expect and inched closer to Rey.

When he saw what rose over the hillside, his body iced over. “WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE THINGS?!” With a shout, he jumped behind Rey, gripping her arms.

“Those are my shooting arms!” she growled.

“Sorry!” He grabbed her waist instead.

Monsters rose above the grassy hill, four thin legs carrying hefty bodies with long, horned faces. People rode on top, but he really didn’t care about them right now, even if they were aiming bows.

Han, Chewbacca, and Finn followed suit with their own weapons, but Finn interestingly lowered his. “Oh, hello.”

The woman at the lead was strong and powerful with beautiful spirals of hair. Ben could see why Finn got that dopey look in his eyes. Ben felt the same when he first saw Rey.

“If you’ve come to scavenge the Death Star, forget it,” the woman said. “It’s been picked clean. Leave this place. There’s nothing for you here.”

“Actually there is something,” Rey said, “and I need it.”

“Maybe I wasn’t clear the first time. Leave this place—is there a man hiding behind you?”

Ben stuck his arm out and waved but did not rise from Rey’s back, not with those creatures beneath the men and women. “Hi, I’m Ben. Can you make your creepy things go away so we can talk?”

“Creepy things?”

Finn put away his pistol and held his hands up. “Listen, we mean no harm, and Ben over there’s just…scared of everything—”

“I am not! Those things are creepy—tell me I’m wrong!”

Finn rolled his eyes. “Forget him, we’re here because the galaxy is in grave danger. The Sith Lord who once helmed that sucker out there is back and we need to stop him before he launches an entire fleet of Star Destroyers with the same planet-destroying capabilities as that thing. There is something he left in there that we need to stop him.”

The woman shook her head. “Nothing of value is left, trust me. We’ve scoured every inch of that place.”

Rey said, “There are areas you can’t get into that only I can.”

The woman smirked. “What makes _you_ so special?”

Ben answered, “She’s very pretty and sweet and treats me like a human being—”

“Ben, zip it,” Han said.

Ben felt a flash of energy and moments later, the group riding the monsters cried out as their weapons were yanked high above their heads. Rey holstered her right gun and drew up her lightsaber, igniting it in one smooth motion.

Rey cocked her head back. “This is what makes me so special.”

Finn threw his arms up to the sky before taking a breath and putting his hands out, trying to keep the peace once again. “We mean you absolutely no harm, we’re only interested in that one thing Rey here needs to get so we can stop Palpatine. In fact, with those crazy waves, we could really use your help getting out there.”

Rey lowered the weapons back to their owners and holstered her lightsaber and pistol. “I take it we can all be friendly now?”

The woman eyed her. “Not so sure about friendly.”

Ben raised his hand from behind Rey again. “If you put your scary horn horses away, I have a peace offering.”

#

“These are my patented SOLO cups,” Ben said, handing them out of a box. “This is actually a sample of a new line with some improvements. See, if you grasp this ring inside the indentation and pull—” He smiled and showed off the drawstring-style closed lid now on the cup. “—it seals the liquid inside, perfect for taking on your journeys riding those…things…you get the picture.”

The woman named Jannah rolled her eyes. “They’re called orbaks, and they’re quite peaceful and beautiful.”

Ben just stared at her. “Anyway, these cups will keep your drink at the same temperature you initially put in there for a full twenty-four hours, hot, cold, doesn’t matter.”

Jannah looked over the cup. “It is impressive. Useful for long rides.”

Han shook his head. “You just brought a crate full of merchandise along?”

Ben pointed his finger. “Free samples make for new customers! Jannah, now that you see how useful this product is, how likely would your team be to purchase them in the future? Just to let you know, there’s a price break at two hundred pieces.”

“Ben, you can’t just hock your products to everyone we meet!”

Ben spoke through his teeth. “Dad, I’m the owner of my own company and you’re a smuggler when Mom’s not looking. I think I’m more qualified to decide where to hock my products!”

“And I’m trying to keep you from getting shot in the face one day.”

“That’s what Rey is here for!”

Jannah leaned toward Finn. “Are they always like this?”

Finn smiled. “Oh, you missed the best stuff. So listen, I hope we didn’t start off on the wrong foot. Like I said, we mean no harm, but we do have a galaxy to protect. Do you know of any way we can get to the remains out there? We’re a little iffy about hovering our ship over it.”

“We have skimmers, but the waves are too rough right now. Low tide will arrive in about twelve hours.”

Rey sighed. “We can’t wait that long. I think Ben had the right idea. We’ll bring the Falcon up, I’ll parachute in, get what I need to get, and you can drop a rope for me after.”

Finn shook his head. “Rey, you’re not going alone in there. We’ll all go with you.”

“I’m the only one that needs to go, there’s no sense in endangering everyone.”

“I’ll go with Rey,” Ben said, handing out the last of the sample cups. “The rest of you can hang back.”

“Ben, it’s not necessary. You can stay back with the others.”

“Rey, I’m coming with you. We’re meant to do this together.” _Do you not want me there?_

Rey sighed. _I don’t want anyone there. This is something I have to do alone._

_Rey, you don’t have to do anything alone. This is what…no, I have to go with you. We do all this together or we don’t do it at all._

Her eyes grew sharper. _It’s not up for discussion._

Ben leaned his intensity back into her. _I’m going with you. Why don’t you want me with you?_ He scoffed and looked up at the sky. _Never mind, I get it._

_No you don’t._

_Yeah I do. I’m a walking disaster, and since there’s no tech left there, I have no use. Just when I start to have a bit of confidence—_

_BEN!_ Her sharp stare curled into a fiery glare. _Look at me now. Does this scare you?_

Ben sucked his lips in. _A little._

_Well I will be turning it on a lot harder than this. Only someone teeming with Dark power can open the door to Palpatine’s chamber. I will become something you don’t want to see._ She softened. _It’s better you don’t go._

Ben sighed. Then he leaned forward enough to touch his nose to hers. He gazed into her eyes, loving her with every piece of himself, and touched a petal-soft kiss upon her cheek. _Does this scare you?_

She gave him a huff of a laugh. _I’m afraid it does not._ She put her fingers to his cheek. _It’s precious, and it warms my soul._

Ben nodded. _And that’s why I need to go with you, so the Darkness doesn’t get to keep you when you’re done._

Rey softened and hung her head. “Ben will come with me.”

Jannah leaned in toward Finn. “I don’t know what just happened, but I want whatever they have going on between them.”

Finn gazed up at her. “That can be arranged.”

Ben smiled and straightened. “We’ll parachute down, keep the Falcon safe, maybe climb back up by rope after.”

Han groaned. “Ben, you can’t climb a rope. You can’t even hold on to a rope!”

“Well put those little knots in it so I can!”

“Would you like a little seat at the end so you can just climb in and buckle up?”

“If you have one, yes! Seriously Dad, do you have one? Because I can probably make one real fast—”

Rey stood and took his hand. “Come on. We have no time to waste. Got to get back for Galacticon, right?”

Ben sucked in an entire planet’s worth of air and clasped his hands in glee. “Oh Rey…”

Han put his hand to his head. “By the fucking stars…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit to Wikipedia in the entry for polymerase from which I got the "Helicase and topoisomerase" section from. Usually I'd rewrite such info in my own words, but...I'm totally not rewriting that in my own words. 
> 
> Argh, the sexual tension! Finn's really got to stay out of their way! (we still have 2-3 more chapters before the big steamfest, but it WILL happen!) 
> 
> These chapters are taking a little longer because the next chapter is the Act 2 climax and aftermath, which I want to make sure I get correct and not totally retcon myself by accident LOL but also this is the heftiest drama part. Yes, we're going to head into the drama part of our dramedy in the second half of the next chapter, be forewarned, grab the tissue box (but remember, only the really really bad guys croak in this fic, so don't fear, and we never stay too dramatic for long) and get ready for our nerdy Ben's take on the battle on the remains of the Death Star!


	11. Siths and Sucky Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, Ben, crabs really aren't that bad.
> 
> Exploring the Death Star ruins gives Ben a taste of the Dark Side. When Kylo acts like a jerk (shocker) it's war between him and Rey while Ben tries to figure out how to help. But when Rey's remaining secrets get spilled, it sets off a chain of events that will push Ben to his greatest as well as pit him against a problem calculus can't solve.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, so this chapter is going to be intense (and long, sorry,) and will have its share of ouchies (tissue alert!) While the humor will remain (definitely the first half, Ben at his finest ridiculousness,) we're getting to the crux of the problems Ben is up against. We will definitely put the drama in dramedy this round, but I promise things will lighten up after. Just remember, this is a Happily Ever After, things never stay sad for too long, and only the really bad bad guys go squish.

Ben and Rey dropped from the Falcon, deployed their SOLO-chutes, and drifted to the top of the Death Star wreckage, using the Force to guide them to their landing zone. Once on solid ground, Ben gathered up the fabric of his parachute and busied his hands mashing it up. It was a welcome distraction from the ominous cold that permeated the place.

They climbed inside the remains lit with beams of daylight from the shattered hull. It reeked of sea water and corroded metal, creaking and moaning with every wave that slammed into the skeletal walls.

Ben tried to still his shivering. “Logically speaking, ghosts don’t exist, unless they’re Force-ghosts, but you have to be a pretty good Jedi to get that to work—fuck it, is there anything undead in here?”

Rey walked through the shattered corridors like nothing could ever bother her. “No, just crabs.”

Ben squished the parachute fabric even more. “Tasty crabs or crawly crabs? Oh stars, not the ones with the really tall eyes, argh! I can’t stand those!”

Rey gave him a look that said she was already tired of this conversation. He closed his mouth, tried not to look at anything that might crawl, and made his hands cramp from smooshing the parachute.

He tripped over something that skidded into the wall from the force of his giant foot. It was an old Storm Trooper helmet, and what he saw inside made him grab Rey and squeeze her for dear life. “Bones! Skull bones—nope, fuck this, I’m out of here!”

Rey sighed. “You’re the one that insisted on coming.”

Ben squeezed his eyes shut. “You’re right. For you.” He let go of her and yanked the parachute dough back and forth, stretching it out. “Let’s keep going.” That came out in a much higher pitch than he ever intended or thought he could muster.

After skirting around a corridor with half its floor already fallen into the sea, they entered a room that held up far better than the rest of the place. Daylight poured in through the transparasteel windows, some of those having blown out long ago.

Ben squeezed his parachute into a log and waved it around. “So this is it, huh? Where my grandfather and your grandfather used to hang out and boff one another when no one was looking?”

Rey snorted into laughter. “By the stars, Ben. I can’t get into character if you make me laugh!”

“Look! It’s Palpatine’s throne! Check this out.” He plopped into the chair and raised one hand. “I claim this throne in the name of Solo! Bow to my glorious power and hand over all your collectible action figures!” He chuckled. “Did you hear that echo? I sound so official!”

Rey laughed and covered her face. She slid her finger to her lips, her face quieting. “You shouldn’t stay there long.”

Ben pursed his lips. “Crabs?”

She gave another huff of a laugh but quieted again. “No. You just look too good up there.” A shadow passed over her, and it both unnerved and aroused him. “I like it, and I don’t really want to.”

Ben knew he should get up. It would be stupid to tempt fate. But something held him there, a rising desire that he knew he should chase away. But looking at her, analyzing the curves of her body, the rise and fall of her chest, the warm smoothness of her throat, what he wanted, what he _really_ wanted, was for her to come to him. His breaths strengthening, he held out his hand. “Join me.”

She didn’t move at first, but he knew she would. He could feel her, the same heat that filled him wafting off of her in waves that could not be ignored. One step and then the other, her hips swaying, such bite and wild fire in her walk. She stopped right before him, her legs between his knees.

“Come to me,” he said with command he normally didn’t have in his voice.

Rey knelt onto the throne, straddling his hips, and attacked him with a kiss he felt right down into his pants. Fed by a ravenous flame he’d never felt before, he pulled her against him, raking his fingertips down her back until he reached that delicious rear of hers. With a squeeze, he pressed up against her. She tore from his lips and bit into his neck, the pain and pleasure burning through every nerve in his body.

He grabbed her by the hair and pulled back. She regarded him with faintly glowing, yellow-orange eyes full of hunger and bite. That just drove everything else in him. He stood with her wrapped around his waist and growled into her chest. “This is how I like you. This is how we are meant to be!”

With a hiss, she stuck her tongue down his throat once more. Surging with a passionate inferno, such deep aggression, he ran her to the wall and pressed up against her, mastering her, overpowering his wild little beast that was made solely for him. She slammed her hand into a panel, and a door opened to an inner chamber.

Where was she taking him? What did she want to do in there? He knew what he wanted to do to her…

She pulled from their kiss, her sweet little chest heaving, so delicious he could just lick every bit of her. Instead, she grabbed his hair this time, so fiery, such fight in her. Oh, she wanted to play rough now, didn’t she?

“Ben, put me down.”

He shook his head. “This is the way it’s supposed to be. The way _we’re_ supposed to be.”

“Ben, your eyes are yellow!”

Passion and burning arousal sunk into icy dread. He wanted to look at himself, to prove it because it couldn’t be true. But even if he had a mirror, he couldn’t dare look. For all his anxieties and fears, this one…this one gripped his very soul.

He let her down and backed away, so damn afraid of himself he didn’t know what to do. He pressed his fists to his eyes, trying to regain control of himself while a faint voice kept trying to tell him to continue exactly as he was. _File it away, file it away, remember who you are…angelsite—PbSO4, Orthorhombic crystals, hardness of 3. Wulfenite—PbMoO4, tetragonal crystals, hardness of 3. Celestite…_

Ben’s sense of wonder, his knowledge, his curiosity in the ways of the universe, all flooded back to him, centering him back in himself. The periodic table of elements flashed across his inner landscape, his favorite math formulas, that beautiful perfection that became Tor-flex, the technical masterpiece of his inventions and his team of droids…

He rubbed his hands over his face and took a deep breath. He was okay. He’d be okay. No more thrones. That was a bad idea. When Rey emerged from the inner sanctum with a dark pyramid in her hand, she still bore those Dark Side glowing eyes, that shadowy fire still burning in her soul.

She put her hand on her hip. “You okay?”

Ben stepped over, and seeing the Darkness still rampant in her made his throat tighten. She was so strong to have so much control when he slipped without even knowing he was doing it. He slid his fingers into her hair, kissed her forehead, and leaned his against hers, just breathing, drinking in her essence, loving her with every bit of himself.

When he looked at her again, her eyes were back to that soft hazel. “I’m okay now,” he whispered. He chuckled. “I was supposed to keep you from going full Dark Side, not the other way around.”

“Yeah, thrones are a bad idea.”

“Yeah, I don’t like thrones. I’m…sorry, Rey, if I went too far, if anything I did—”

She put a hand to his cheek. “Don’t apologize. Actually it was fun—” She smiled, but it softened. “—but not worth losing the Ben I fell in love with.”

He pulled her into his arms. “You know, I used to hate myself a lot, for everything I couldn’t do or just how I couldn’t handle normal daily life the way everyone else could, but the more I see what I could have become, what I _could_ become, the more I like myself exactly as I am.” He shrugged. “Maybe being an anxious, picky, tech-obsessed ultra-nerd who is calmed by math and plays with rocks isn’t so bad after all.”

Rey smiled. “I personally think it’s wonderful.”

“Awww.” He kissed her and delighted in its gentleness, its sweetness, its pure love. Passion would have its time, but as exciting as that was, he never wanted to feel that out of control again, and he couldn’t help but admire Rey who had the mastery to pull him out when he needed it.

The sooner this whole Palpatine/Dark Side mess was over, the happier he’d be.

He parted from her kiss, enjoying that soft and hazy look upon her face before turning his attention to the whole reason for this journey. “So that’s the Wayfinder, huh?” He held out his hand. “May I?”

She let him take it. He held it up to the light and ran his fingers along its sides. “Oh this looks neat. Let’s open this sucker up!”

As he gripped the sides of it, she said, “Ben, that’s not how that works.”

“Rey, the sides clearly have a separation point.” He pushed and pulled to no avail. “Let me get my tool set—”

“Ben, no! You don’t need to open it up to get it to work!”

He turned on his huge puppy-dog eyes. “But I want to see what it’s made of.”

“Ben, you can’t just pop out your tools and open up every little piece of tech you see.” She reached for it.

He held it high out of her grasp, grinning. “ _You_ have clearly not been with me long enough.” He stuck his tongue between his teeth as he kept it out of her reach.

Rey put her palm out. “Wayfinder or pain, your choice.”

Ben twiddled it in his fingers. “What kind of pain we talking?” He waggled his eyebrows, thinking about that ravenous little bite she had taken out of him earlier.

He could tell she was trying not to smile. “Ben—”

The Wayfinder flew out of his hand. “Hey! No fair!”

A slap against leather far behind him told him Rey didn’t Force-snatch it. Ben turned to see Kylo silhouetted against the outside light, cape billowing, the dark pyramid in his grasp.

Ben slid behind Rey as her eyes turned to fire. “Give it back RIGHT NOW! I am infused with Darkness and not afraid to use it.”

Kylo nodded toward Ben. “I can tell by the marks on his neck.”

Ben tried to suppress his giggle and failed.

“Yeah, so wonderful to have her, isn’t it? The one you stole from me.”

Rey growled, “I was never yours to begin with.”

Kylo looked toward Palpatine’s old seat. “You know, the throne belongs to us, Rey. You and me. Not this one. The throne of the Sith should go to those who are masters of the darkness, not that pathetic piece of Light garbage you can’t seem to resist.”

Rey snorted and put her hands on her hips. “You should have seen him a few minutes ago. Put you to shame.”

“Hmph.” It was almost like he tried to laugh. “There is room for two in the Silencer. Me and you. And the only way you get to Exegol is with me.” He whipped his hand down and smashed the Wayfinder on the ground, its four sides splitting open to spew the internal components.

Ben pointed. “I KNEW THE DAMN THING OPENED!”

Rey screamed with unbridled rage and charged at Kylo, her yellow lightsaber humming to life. He ducked out of a few strikes before he slipped out of the throne-room, Rey hot on his tail.

#

Ben knew he had to go help her (whatever help he could ever afford) but first… He dove to his knees, scooped up the Wayfinder components, and stuffed them into one of his pouches.

He ran out the hole after them and stopped himself at the edge. They were already way down below, fighting with those immense waves crashing around them, red and yellow sabers slamming against one another. Gingerly, he slid his foot out, testing the next step down while gripping the twisted metal for dear life. When that seemed safe enough, he edged all the way out.

He’d never seen a wall of water so big, but his soul pretty much packed its bags and said fuck you as it jumped out of his body. The swell heaved toward him and he clung for dear life, clamping his eyes shut. It just as soon disappeared under him, and he breathed for half a second before the crash spewed water up from beneath, drenching him.

Bitter, cold, aggravated, and feeling the heaviness of wet cloth against his skin, he inched down to the next landing. Just as he finally got a good position to stand in, he looked at his arm and saw a white little crab scrambling up his sleeve. Screaming, he flailed both arms and lost his balance on the tiny strip of slippery metal that had been holding him.

“SHIIIIT!” he cried and pulled the string for his second SOLO-chute. As he drifted toward the two warriors below, he realized that honestly, this was the only way he was ever getting down. He had to admit, as he watched the battle below, that Kylo was a hell of a fighter. Rey certainly had the upper hand, but that beautiful red saber just danced with a life of its own.

Ben could never do a piece of weaponry like that justice. He couldn’t do his _own_ lightsaber justice.

Just about to the bottom, another one of those monster swells came crashing in, spewing seawater high into the air and snagging his parachute. It pulled him down faster than he planned, dragging him backwards. “Fuckety fuckety shit shit shit!” He disconnected the ropes just in time before the parachute got sucked into the sea.

“I do not like oceans!” He pushed his soaking wet body to his feet. “I do not like waves! And I most certainly do NOT LIKE CRABS! Fucking sea spiders!” For a second, he worried that they were in his sopping wet hair, but Rey was way too busy to help him now.

He finally made it to the battle and turned on his lightsaber, not really knowing what he would do with it considering how the two outmatched him in every way. Besides, Rey seemed to be tiring Kylo out.

Which made Ben wonder something. He had seen her tear apart the Storm Troopers on the Destroyer. Kylo was good, really good, but not as good as her. Why hadn’t she killed him? She could, Ben knew she could, but she didn’t. He knew she felt pity for him, but she also said that if he was out to kill, they had to kill him.

But she only attacked, exhausting him and nothing more. Logically, it made no sense. There was a missing variable.

Kylo whipped around and charged at Ben. Maybe this was a bad idea. Ben held up his lightsaber, ready to fight, but that furious, caped, soaking wet version of himself was snarling, ready to kill. Ben did what any sensible man of intelligence would do—he ran for his life in the other direction. He was pretty sure he could outrun Kylo again, that much he was good at, but he swore he could feel searing heat swinging right behind him.

Just ahead, decades of constant seawater left a gooey sheen of algae that took his feet right out from under him, just narrowly missing his own lightsaber. He remembered throwing down those slippery pellets on the Destroyer and truly felt his comeuppance.

Red light whizzed down toward him, and he rolled over and blocked it just in time while trying to find purchase on the ground. Again and again he blocked the raging beast that so desperately wanted to destroy him.

“What did I ever do to you?” Ben cried.

Growling with every breath, lightsaber held high, Kylo roared, “YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME! And you KICKED ME IN THE BALLS!”

That much was fair. Ben pulled his knees up and waved his lightsaber haphazardly over himself to block any further swings. To his surprise, Kylo yelped as he was yanked into the air. Rey thrust her hand down, and Kylo flattened onto the ground.

The Force! Why didn’t Ben think of that? He really wasn’t good at this stuff.

Kylo pushed himself to his feet, and Rey attacked again. Ben scooted himself out of the slippery muck and got to his own feet. He wasn’t sure what help he could ever be, but he couldn’t sit back and do nothing.

Kylo slid between him and Rey again, fighting her off and trying to attack Ben. This was at least a little easier. When half of Kylo’s energy was already taken up by Rey, that left a lot less blocking for Ben to do.

Kylo gasped for breath, his strikes slow and less frequent. He staggered, trying to turn on Ben, but every time he tried, Rey went on the attack. His furious face melted into bitter anguish. “You’ll give everything to him?! Leave me with nothing?!”

“It’s over!” Rey spat between her teeth. “Ben and I will end Palpatine. The Final Order, all of it is over!”

“HAAAA!” Kylo screamed as if he wanted to laugh but couldn’t. “Liar! And he doesn’t even know you’re lying!”

Rey’s face turned ice cold and deadly, making Ben’s heart stop. He had never seen that look on her face.

Kylo swung his saber between the both of them but not really attacking, just giving himself space, nodding with wide eyes, on the verge of madness. “Your dyad, your precious little dyad—I know what you’re REALLY PLANNING TO DO!”

Ben shook his head. “What are you even talking about?”

Kylo looked at him, so amused yet so broken. “You have no idea what she really wants you for—”

Rey attacked Kylo with a scream of rage and a twirling saber he barely could block. But he kept talking even as he narrowly escaped being impaled. “She came to you, and you never questioned, did you? She just told you she needed her true dyad and had to get your powers to open up.”

Rey and Kylo entered a standoff, pushing at each other with the Force and getting nowhere.

Ben wasn’t sure if he should intervene yet couldn’t help but wonder why Kylo was running his mouth. “Uh, yeah, of course, so we could defeat Palpatine. This was all pretty clear.”

Kylo bared his teeth, but his eyes flamed as if he was on his last words he’d ever say and wanted to make them sting. “Of course Rey needs her dyad at full power, but not to defeat him. It’s so she can give that energy TO him!”

Ben scoffed. “She would never do that. It doesn’t even make sense—”

Rey shrieked in fury and broke the push of Force, bombarding Kylo once again with her lightsaber. 

The caped warrior kept backing away, desperately trying to avoid Rey’s strikes. “It makes perfect sense and I know because _I_ was supposed to be the one to make it happen!”

“SHUT UP!” Rey screamed.

“Only I wasn’t strong enough, not like her true dyad. Why else would she need you to fight him? Why not send your precious Luke Skywalker or someone strong in the Force to do it? Why ask someone who isn’t a warrior and can’t fight for shit. Why? Because only the true dyad will bring Palpatine back to power. She’s selling you right to him!”

“YOU LIAR!” Ben roared and jumped into the attack.

“Am I lying? Go ahead and ask her. Search your feelings, you’ll sense the truth.”

Ben stopped fighting, not wanting to ask, not wanting to believe. But he felt something from Rey, something heavy, murky, and full of tension. “Rey?”

She slammed two more times at Kylo, her energy, or perhaps her motivation dwindling. “Ben…”

“Rey? He’s lying, right?” But what he felt across the bond felt way different than where his hopes wanted to lead him. “Rey…” He closed his eyes for a moment. “Rey what am I feeling? What is this that’s coming from you?” He sucked in breath after breath. “Rey…please just tell me the truth. Look at me.”

She didn’t, only stared at the ground. She deactivated her lightsaber.

“Rey, please look at me. Please tell me what I’m feeling right now is wrong.”

She didn’t. “That was the plan. The original plan. Before the Resistance. Before you. That was the real reason I was seeking you out. To give Palpatine the life energy of our dyad.”

Ben stood, trembling, his heart shattering. “You were just going to use me?”

Rey’s lip quivered. “Yes. Until the galaxy grew on me, the Resistance grew on me…until I met you. Ben I told you from the beginning I was not a good person. I meant that. But being with you…Ben, you turned my entire view around, my entire heart. Falling in love with you…I knew I could never hurt you or your family or anyone after I knew who you all were. And we would go before Palpatine and destroy him instead of giving in to him.”

The world grew cloudy and dim, a place where nothing made sense, some strange other world where the woman that embraced his heart and gave him strength to be himself wasn’t at all who he thought she was, and his love for her fell into an abyss instead of being amplified back to him. He didn’t like this world. It was cold and wet and stinging with mistrust and heartbreak.

Ben blinked down tears, the devastating crush to his soul aching beyond any comprehension. “I thought you loved me. Really loved me.”

“I do! Damnit beyond anything else, I do. I love you so much, Ben, that’s why I wasn’t going to go through with it, even if that was my initial plan.”

Kylo shook his head. “Oh it was never off the table and you know it—”

“You SHUT THE FUCK UP! You don’t know me as well as you think you do. And you don’t know him! Because if you did, if you really knew him, you’d know why I could never hurt him.” She sniffled and shook her head. “Ben I’m sorry. I was desperate; you don’t know…you have no idea what I’m giving up…he promised…something he’d never deliver anyway. And I don’t care. I don’t want it if it means hurting you.”

Kylo stepped forward. “Rey, you don’t mean that. You have to give in! You have to give Palpatine what he wants!”

“No, I won’t. I won’t do that to Ben. Do you hear me? I won’t ever do that to him!”

“There is no other choice! If you don’t give in to him, I will be nothing—we will be nothing—it will all be over for both of us—”

“You shut your mouth, you little fuck! You destroy everything you touch!”

“I AM ALREADY DESTROYED! I have no hope! I have no life! I don’t have you! I am nothing and have always been and all I ever had was you and the little crumbs he throws me. Palpatine is all the hope I have left!”

“You’ll sacrifice the galaxy for yourself? For your pathetic, selfish self?!”

“For myself—FOR YOU! You know what happens! Rey, if you don’t give in to him, you’ll—”

“SHUT UP!” She drew her golden lightsaber in a flash and dashed at him. “SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!” Rey hammered at Kylo who was desperate to stop the barrage. But she was fierce, so much more than Ben had ever seen, raging from the depths of her darkened soul.

Her secrets had been spilled on the ground by Kylo’s hand, and he would pay dearly.

This strange world that now existed, that made no sense, that was broken and cracked, it whirred before Ben in some strange carousel. He had to try to comprehend it, process it, have it make sense. He couldn’t live in a world that didn’t make sense. That was the beauty of math and physics. Once it was all put together, the formulas working out precisely, the universe existed in perfection and sense and balance.

But this?

Her love for him was real. It had to be. He felt it. He became someone new because of it. He gave everything for it, and it was the only thing that made sense in his heart, his big but fragile and easily confused heart. It should have been so simple, really, to love and be loved. But that’s not what the galaxy held for him. He loved and was hurt. He loved and was hated. He loved and was betrayed.

But not by her. It was never supposed to be by her. Luke said she wasn’t done with her secrets. Luke had warned him, and Ben ignored it, blinded, yes, blinded by his own desperate desire to be loved in return. What else had he missed? What else was lying bleeding right before his eyes?

Was that why she cried in his arms? Because she knew what she was going to do, maybe what she _had_ to do for some reason he did not yet know, and didn’t have the heart to tell him?

And what of Kylo? A clone ten years his junior, a man with his exact DNA that wasn’t supposed to exist, who according to Rey had endured nothing but pain and torment being grown into a master of Darkness. A man who, based on all the screaming he did, was now clinging to the last bits left of everything he ever had.

Rey didn’t believe that Kylo could love, but Ben could see it. Kylo loved her, in whatever way he could, and Ben had taken that away from him.

What else was left?

Even as Kylo fought now, barely trying to save himself, Ben could see it in his expressive eyes. Pain, so much pain, despair, hopelessness, resignation to a fate he had completely lost control of. Ben did not know what was going on in that young man’s life, but he could sense, perhaps by that extra faint hint of a bond still left between the three, that Kylo was at the edge of an abyss. 

Kylo took a gash to his leg, another to the arm, and a stab to his shoulder before he started losing ground, crumpling against her fury. Finally, Rey slammed into Kylo’s saber and knocked it out of his hand. As he reached for it, she thrust her hand out and cast it toward the sea.

Ben eyed it, slipped his arm behind his back, and drew it to his hand out of her line of sight.

Rey kicked Kylo in the stomach, knocking him to the ground. “I’ll kill you for this!” She readied her saber, but Kylo held it back on the Force.

In that moment, Ben knew if Kylo’s power faltered, she really would split him in half. The rage, the thrill of the hunt, it gleamed in her eyes. Whatever Kylo revealed, she thirsted for blood because of it.

She really would kill him. She would sink deep into the Dark Side and let wrath possess her soul.

Kylo just looked up, trying his best to still her strength, but in his eyes—such familiar eyes Ben had seen all his life—Kylo had already given up.

And all Ben could see was a child who had never been given the chance to really grow, and a man who had never been given the chance to live.

Ben knew he shouldn’t care. He should let Rey do what she had to do. Killing Kylo would probably solve half their problems.

And at the same time knew that it was wrong.

Ben’s heart pounded in his chest. “Rey! Stop! He’s unarmed!”

When she couldn’t wrest her lightsaber from Kylo’s Force-grip, she kicked him in the face, blood spraying from his mouth. She lifted the saber high above her head.

“Rey! No!” Ben cried. But he knew she wasn’t going to stop. He could feel it, feel the fire and vengeance burning out of control.

With a roar she swung down, and Ben had no choice. He activated Kylo’s saber and swung it up from below, blocking Rey’s strike. She gasped, eyes wide, incredulous, as Ben pushed her back with that fiery red lightsaber that crackled with violence and fury.

Her eyes flitted from the locked sabers to his face. “Ben?”

He didn’t know why he hesitated to respond. The red saber just held him entranced, as if it sung with the heat of battle, wanting him to continue, to fight against her. A fleeting feeling, he stuck it into one of his special compartments where all the hurtful or dangerous thoughts had to go. With a breath, he softened. “Don’t kill Kylo. He’s my brother.”

Rey flinched. “Ben—”

“Rey, it’s not his fault he was born, made, whatever. It’s not his fault he was raised by creepy cultists to make him into some evil warlord. And I bet Palpatine has been driving him nuts from the day he was born too, just like us. It’s not his fault he got pushed into his.” He deactivated the red saber and felt immediate relief, even if he already missed the badassery of it. “He should have a chance to live, really live, like we’re all supposed to, not as that asshole’s puppet.” Ben hooked Kylo’s saber onto his belt.

Kylo stared at him with utter astonishment laced with mistrust. He pushed himself to his feet. “Why are you doing this?”

Ben turned to him. “Like I said, you’re my brother.”

“No, but _why_? Why would you show me mercy? After everything I’ve done, why?”

Ben put his hand on Kylo’s shoulder. His clone gave him a look that said he was about to rip Ben’s head off, but Ben was the one with two lightsabers, so… “Because of everything I said, and because you should be given the chance to redeem yourself. You can’t do that dead.”

Kylo just stared at him, so deeply confused. “I’ve done nothing but hurt you, attack you, try to kill you. How can you show me this kindness now? What is—this has to be a trick—I don’t understand this!”

“No, it’s not a trick, just—” He threw his hands up. “Why do we have to be enemies? Because Palpatine said so? Because he’s calling the shots and you have to do what he says? He’s not your father! And fuck, you’re a grown man, you make your own damn choices. I mean seriously, what do you want? A shitty life dictated by that asshole? What did he promise you, the galaxy? He wants that shit for himself, he’s not giving it to you. And what would you want with it, anyway? I run a business and it’s a royal pain in the ass; could you imagine an entire galaxy? Your really want that aggravation?”

Kylo turned his head, sort of shaking it, sort of tilting it, not really sure at all what to make of all this.

“Look Kylo, come with me, with us. I can’t give you a galaxy, but…I can try to give you a home. A real one where people actually care about you, where you can live for something besides serving some master who hurts you. My mom’s great and my dad’s…my dad, and they love me, and sometimes drive me crazy—mostly Dad, but even so, at the end of the day, we still have each other. Who besides Rey ever gave half a damn about _you_ , not what you can do or what you can give them?”

Kylo’s nostrils flared with his sharp breaths. He was so confused, but Ben felt like maybe, just maybe he was getting through. “I’ve had no one. Without her, I have no one.”

“Well that doesn’t have to be the case if you just come with us and leave all this shit behind. You can have me. I’m…half crazy and irritate everyone around me, but I care and I can help you. And mom will…have a heart attack when she finds out about you, but she’s so sweet, I know she’ll take care of you just like she does me. And there’s Uncle Chewy—don’t piss him off, but otherwise he’s great, and Dad means well, and there’s the Knights of Ben—”

“The what?”

“My team of droids. I call them the Knights of Ben.” Ben looked over to Rey, who bore such an incredulous but enamored look upon her face. “And Rey will be there too. Someone you know and can trust while we all figure each other out.” Ben shrugged. “Besides, I grew up an only child. I never had a brother before. Might be fun.” He grinned. “I can make you eat paste and rub dirt in your hair.” After the death glare Kylo gave him, Ben shrunk. “Oh hell, I’m going to be the one eating paste, aren’t I?”

Kylo exhaled and hung his head. “No one…has ever shown me mercy. You’re not like the others, you’re…something else.”

Ben huffed and smiled. “Yeah, the biggest dork in the galaxy. I wear that name with pride, you know.” He extended his hand. “Will you join me? Become a part of our family.”

Kylo remained silent.

“Please?”

Kylo shoved a hand so harshly through his hair Ben thought he’d rip his scalp off. “I don’t…I’m not…I don’t know what to do about this. I need to think. I need time.”

Ben nodded, retracting his hand. “Okay. I get it. Trust can be hard. I’m…scared of everyone, really hard to trust that people won’t attack me or hurt me or post billboards of my nose with comparison landmarks on it.”

“But you’re not afraid of me?”

“Well, sort of, kind of, definitely, but…you need someone to believe in you, just like I did.” He shrugged. “Maybe somewhere, through what’s left of our dyad or triad or whatever this is, you can feel I’m sincere, and maybe you want more than this Final Order crap. Palpatine will never give you anything that doesn’t serve him first. At least with us, you know we all care about each other, and we’ll care about you, too.”

Kylo remained silent, then gave a half nod. “I will consider it. Give me time to think it over.” He held his hand out. “Can I have my lightsaber back?”

Ben slid it behind his back. “Um…no…”

“Why not?”

“I…need it.”

Kylo narrowed his eyes. “You already have a lightsaber.”

“Yeah but I need a red one. Just…until after Galacticon.”

Rey put her hand to her head. “Oh Ben…”

“I’ll give it back after! Promise. It’s just—really gonna look good with my Darth Vader cosplay.”

Kylo shook his head, amused. “I don’t know what to make of you, but you are sincere.” He started walking away. “If our paths cross again, I’ll consider your offer then.”

Ben nodded and turned back toward Rey.

She simply stood there, tears filling her eyes. “That was sweet of you.”

He didn’t know what to say and just shrugged.

“I’m so sorry. I don’t know if you could ever trust me again, but know that everything I felt for you was the truth, and the moment I fell in love with you, that deal with Palpatine was off the table. I never would put you in harm’s way for my own gain. Never.” She blinked down those tears. “Please don’t hate me. I’ve only ever wanted to be loved by someone like you.”

Ben walked over to her and traced the wetness on her cheek, tears mixed with seawater, cold and warm. “I could never hate you.” He smiled, just so happy to see her face, always happy to see her face. “I’m sure you had a good reason.”

Rey shook her head. “What?”

“I mean, I was in shock and it hurt, at first anyway, because I guess in some logical way it would make sense for Palpatine to send you to find me so he could use the life-giving power of our dyad for himself. But I know your heart, and I know you love me. And even when you barely knew me, you still cared. You were always a good person, right from the beginning, like I’ve always said. You gave a damn about me when, damn Rey, the rest of the galaxy didn’t. Even that moment right in the beginning when you checked on me after the whole Vader fight and you picked at the spiders in my hair—Rey, who else in the galaxy would have done that for me besides my mother? But you did it. You were kind, and you cared. So…if you were going to use me for my power, you must have had a good reason.” He shrugged. “I don’t know what Palpatine promised you, but it had to have been important.”

Rey shook her head, backing up. “No, you can’t be this trusting, this forgiving.”

“Why not?”

“No! Damnit Ben be angry at me! Hate me! Do something that makes sense!”

“Rey—”

“No! You forgive Kylo and ask him to be part of your family? You forgive me after I was going to turn you over to Palpatine to get what I want? You forgave your father after he questioned whether you were his son? You can’t be this good! You can’t! You…can’t be real!”

Ben tilted his head and flinched. “Rey, this is me. This is who I am. I…love too much for my own good, that’s why I get hurt so often.” He lifted his shoulders, his eyebrows turning upward. “Can’t help it.”

Rey put her hands to her head and threw them up like she didn’t know what to do with them, with herself, with him. She strode over and grabbed his face, just staring at him with tears in her eyes, shaking, on the verge of sobbing, and he didn’t understand it. She leaned her face into his chest and broke down, and he still couldn’t figure out why she was so upset.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her on the head. “Rey, it’s okay. It will be okay, I promise.”

“It won’t!” She pushed away from him and pointed at him. “I said you were too good for this galaxy and I meant it. You’re…too good…too precious…you’re everything!” She couldn’t stop sobbing. Ben wanted so badly to just hold her, make everything alright again, but every time he took a step forward she took one back.

“You’re too good for the galaxy and you’re too good for me.”

“Rey, no—”

“And you’re too damn good to walk into the face of death against Palpatine! No! I won’t do it! I won’t risk you!”

“What—Rey! What are you saying?!”

He took another step forward, and she drew up her lightsaber. “Stay away from me! I’m going against him alone.”

Ben’s heart stopped. “Rey! No!”

“I won’t let him hurt you! I won’t let him take you away from the galaxy! You are too precious! You are its light, you are MY LIGHT and I WON’T LET HIM PUT THAT OUT!” She ran for Kylo’s TIE Silencer.

Ben’s world closed in around him. “REY! NO!” He chased after her, his long running legs giving him one advantage she didn’t have for a change. Just as he almost caught up to her, she swung at him with her lightsaber. He cried out and jumped back, horrified that she’d turn on him like that.

“STAY BACK!”

Ben charged at her again. She was not going to go against Palpatine alone. He knew what happened to her if she did that, and _he was not going to lose her!_ “REY! COME BACK!”

She swung at him again and he fell to the ground, trying to get away from her strikes. Once he was down, she ran again.

He wasn’t giving up. He would never give up. If she got on that ship, he’d get in his. If she flew there, he’d beat her to it. Nothing was going to stop him from stopping her! He charged ahead with every muscle in his legs, and this time when she swung at him, he blocked it with his blue saber and threw off her strike. He had to get past her now, get to the Silencer and destroy it, make it so she couldn’t leave without him.

Again she struck at him, and he continued to block, determined, so much stronger and more focused than he’d ever been with his lightsaber. He would not stop, and she kept swinging every time he got close.

“Rey! You can’t go alone! I won’t let you!”

“You can’t stop me!”

“Damnit Rey! You don’t understand! Listen to me! I had a vision, us against Palpatine, only I was tossed down a chasm and you had to face him alone, and you know what happened?” He put his hands out, lightsaber still in hand. “You died! I found you after you defeated him, but you were dead! I will not let that happen, Rey. You are just as important in this galaxy as I am.”

“No I’m not!”

“YOU ARE TO ME! Damnit Rey, you are to me!”

She paused, breathing. “Your vision is unfinished.”

“What do you mean?”

“I know your vision because I had it too. We go before him, he drains us, tosses you into a chasm, I use the last of my strength to defeat him and die. You climb out of the chasm and find me.”

“Yes! That’s why I can’t let you face him alone! You’ll die!”

“NO BEN! YOU DIE!”

His energy disappeared.

“You give me everything, Ben. You give all of your life force to revive me, and it costs you your life. Only I don’t get you back.”

She was right. He had missed that part. And that’s exactly what he _would_ have done.

“Your mother doesn’t get you back, your father, your uncles, your company, the galaxy. Everyone is deprived of that wonderful mind of yours, that beautiful, magnificent mind and heart that is a thousand times what anyone else’s is. And that’s why I have to go alone, because I won’t let you die.” She charged for the Silencer again.

“Rey no!” He ran once more. “NO!”

She shoved him with a blast of force that knocked him off to the side and down a series of jagged steps covered in that awful, slippery algae. He couldn’t believe she did that, but he knew why, and now he was so far away from her. He gripped his unlit lightsaber in his hand, finger on the switch, ready to thrust himself through the air and cut that damn TIE into pieces before she could get to it.

He just needed a head start. He ran forward, screaming her name, and charged up the steps. Just about to the top, his foot slipped, and he fell forward onto his arm, jamming his thumb forward.

Stunned at first. Something wrong but not quite registering. Pain. A lot of it, but unreal, somehow unreal. He tried to push himself up but his body was weakening so fast, his stomach burning in agony. He knew what he’d find when he looked down and at the same time refused to believe it was real. His own hand, the lightsaber, burning blue plasma stuck through his stomach.

His own clumsy fucking hand that triggered the switch when he fell.

_Oh no…oh no…oh no…what did I do? This can’t be happening…_

He wanted to call out to Rey, but he felt so numb, and every breath hurt so much. Adrenaline raced through his body, limbs shaking, legs not working.

Ben fell back, not really knowing how to get it out, not really knowing what to do. All he felt was his body racing away from him, thinking of his mother and her smiling face and wise dark eyes. _Mom…Mom I fucked up so bad, I’m so scared…I’m so sorry…_

Breaking her heart, breaking his father’s heart right after they just formed a real relationship, breaking Uncle Chewy’s heart.

All his hopes and dreams, visions, product launches, projects that would never be finished, everything cut short.

Rey…

She had been running off to face hell alone so he could live.

And what had he done?

“ _BEEEEEEEEEN!_ ” she screamed with everything in her soul. Did she see? Did she feel it through their bond? He wasn’t sure of anything anymore.

She appeared in a flash with her arm behind his neck. She clicked off the lightsaber and tossed the hilt aside. “WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

He felt so stupid, so damn clumsy and inept, a mess, a disaster, just like always. _Slipped and fell on my fucking saber._

Every breath hurt, but his body started softening, going numb. That felt better, but he knew enough about biology and medicine to know that was a bad sign. _Rey I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you to face it alone and now…no matter what I do, I just always fuck up._

“Don’t say that, don’t even think that!”

_Tell my parents I love them, please—stars, this will kill them!_

“You’ll tell them yourself!”

_Rey, you are the most important and best thing that ever happened to me. Your love made every minute of my life worth living._

“BEN!”

_Let Kylo help you fight him. Don’t go alone. Be safe. I love you. I’ll always love you._

Rey’s face, so crumpled in agony, straightened into pure determination. He really wished she’d kiss him just once more. If he had to die, he wanted it to be in that moment of heaven.

Instead, she placed her hand upon his wound, and the look that came over her face was one of pure grace. “No life is worth living without you.”

Ben swore she was glowing, but it could have been the effects of accidentally stabbing himself to death like an idiot. No…something…something else was happening. Weakness turned to energy. The trembling stopped. The horrendous pain in his stomach drained until it was no more. Strength returned to his legs and arms. Breathing, it felt good and right again, no more pain, no more suffering.

He sat up and gazed into her eyes. She had healed him! He had heard of ancient uses of Force healing, but never knew of anyone who could actually do it.

That glow on her skin faded, and she smiled with such loving beauty, such wonder. No creature of darkness here. She was nothing but pure light.

“Rey,” he whispered. “You saved me.”

She laughed through the tears in her eyes. He kissed her, glad that it wasn’t a dying kiss, glad to have another chance at true happiness once more with a woman he would love beyond the reaches of time and space.

Rey dropped out of the kiss. Her body sunk in his hands and she started moaning in agony. He opened his eyes to find hers tightly shut. She arched her back and cried out, her limbs trembling.

Ben could barely breathe. “REY! What’s wrong? What’s happening?!”

The woman who took a saber burn to her side and merely grunted now just kept wailing in anguish. He checked her stomach where he had been wounded, wondering if she had transferred his damage to her. No, that was clear. He gripped her arm, trying to figure out why this was happening when she screamed. He immediately let go and saw her skin had broken where he had touched her.

Breaths of panic pumped in and out of his lungs. “REY! REY! WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?! REY _PLEAAAASE!_ ”

Pounding footsteps and then Kylo dove in next to them. “What the hell happened?!”

Ben could barely speak. “I fell on my fucking lightsaber and almost died and she healed me and then this happened and I don’t know what’s going on!”

“FUCK! She used all of her Force to heal you. SHIT!”

“But what—”

“The Force is the only thing keeping her alive! She seriously didn’t tell you?”

Ben felt like he could scream until all worlds ended. “NO!”

“Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck!”

“I’ll give it back—”

Kylo slammed him in the chest. “NO! She gave this to you so you could live. Your body hasn’t fully healed yet, without the Force in you right now you’re just as dead as she is, and she will NOT let that happen!”

“I DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITHOUT HER! I DON’T CARE!”

Kylo shook his head and placed one hand on her stomach, the other on her head. “I’ll give her what I can. But I’m not as powerful as she is. I don’t think it will be enough.” He closed his eyes.

“Kylo please, please just tell me what is happening. I can find some other way!”

“You can’t. It’s genetic. If not for the Force, she would have died years ago.” Kylo swallowed. “Same as me.”

Ben felt like the galaxy had been ripped out from under him. “What?!”

“Fucking Sith cloning. They didn’t get it right. And this is the price we pay.” Kylo hung his head, his arms shaking, strangled cries of pain he tried to hide escaping from his throat. “I won’t be enough.”

But Rey’s misery had quieted into a dull moan. “Kylo…no…”

“I have nothing to…live for, anyway. Take it…all of me—” His arms collapsed, and he fell on top of her before rolling to the ground. Ben’s stomach clenched as he watched blood seep out of Kylo’s scars.

No. This wasn’t how things were supposed to be. This wasn’t right. None of this was right.

_A dyad in the Force. A power like life itself._

Life itself but she was dying. Kylo was dying. And if Ben tried to help either of them, he would die because of his own stupidity.

What good was a power like life itself if it couldn’t do a damn thing for any of them?

_But it’s all in me, isn’t it? I was the failure. I was the broken link. Power suppressed, unable to reach my full potential. She relied on me getting to my strongest so we could be at our strongest. The power of life, flowing through us. The power of life and it can’t save any of us._

_But only…_

_Only because…_

_I’m not strong enough…_

Ben looked down at Rey, his beloved, the person who believed in him and loved him despite everything. The woman he loved beyond everything.

Love. She gave her entire life to him out of love. Kylo was giving his life to her. Love, all of it, love.

And wasn’t that, at the end of the day, Ben’s greatest strength? Beyond his mind, his intelligence, his mother always said it was his capacity to love that made him so extra special, and hadn’t Rey said it, too?

In that moment, he knew exactly what he had to do.

“Rey.” He smiled. “I love you.”

He placed his hand upon her chest and burst with every bit of love within himself, digging deep into his love for her, his family, the universe and its beautiful mathematical perfection, its exquisite creations and existences, the forgiveness he extended even when it wasn’t deserved, his wonder and pure joy of discovery. But most of all her, his beloved, his dyad in the force, his everything.

His love.

All of it.

All of it to tear down his walls inside.

And then he felt it.

Bursting through him, like the Big Bang itself, bursting into life, bursting into existence, nothing to stand in his path, the pure love in his heart breaking through the suppression, breaking open the clamp on the dyad, awakening his full and true potential, everything he was ever meant to be and ever would be.

Light surrounded him. Light burned in him. And Rey, in his arms, looked back at him in awe, no longer crying, no longer in pain, eyes bright and alive. Ben gripped her hands and felt the tug—her darkness pulling his light. And his darkness pulled it back. Light moving into dark, dark moving into light, one into the other, moving in a circle, moving like a vortex, darkness and light driving each other into a frenzy of creation.

The birth of a universe within their joined power. A power like life itself.

Rey sat up, moving to her knees, eyes locked on his, their hands still entwined as the power flowed through their circuit, the Force growing and multiplying within their grasp. She looked so different, so pure and light, as if no trouble had ever hardened her heart. She just stared at him in pure awe, while he merely smiled back in return, loving her with everything in him, enough to break him out of his own chains.

He didn’t need to ask if she was okay. Here they were of one mind, of one being. One whole being merging and creating. She was back to her strong, energized self. The Force repaired whatever had gripped her, and it remained in him too, keeping him together until his body fully healed itself.

This pure joy was magnificent, beyond any description, and was the beauty of perfection in his soul. He could see formulas and calculations in perfect numerical balance, the universe at its finest.

And he knew love like no other. Love not only for her, but for everything.

“Kylo,” Ben said, “join us.”

His dying clone barely moved, only looked at him and blinked. “Just let me die,” he whispered.

Ben smiled down at him. “No.” As if it required no effort at all, he raised his clone brother on the Force, placed one hand on Rey’s and the other on his own. Kylo gasped as light poured into him, a bypass on the circuit formed between Rey and Ben but not impeding it in the least. The color returned to Kylo’s ashen skin, his sunken eyes brightening. The scars sealed back up even if they remained, but they no longer bled. Finally, he could kneel on his own, and he looked to Ben in shock and disbelief.

Ben simply smiled.

The work was done.

He slowed the push and pull of dark and light, letting the energy settle back into them. When all had finally quieted, he let go of Rey’s hands, closed his eyes, and simply basked in what had just happened.

This was the dyad’s true power. In his vision, they hadn’t even gotten to use it, not like this. But now he knew its potential, what it could do. 

“Ben,” Rey said, her voice so light and happy.

He opened his eyes and smiled. “For you.”

She put her hand to his cheek. “For us.”

“For the galaxy.”

Ben pulled her into a kiss, beaming with that utter delight of connection with her, loving her with every bit of himself. Love that saved her life after her love saved his.

He never wanted to stop kissing her as he held her in his arms. So much could have been lost this day. It had all gone so wrong. But love made it right again. Love became life.

Ben left her lips and stroked her cheek. “We do it together. We have the power, and we will win.”

Rey softened, nodded, and smiled. “Okay.”

Ben turned. Kylo sat off to the side, quiet, staring at the sea which was calming. Rey crawled over to him. He looked at her, his eyes confused and disjointed, not sure of what to make of anything. Rey answered by grasping him in a deep hug. “Kylo, thank you for giving everything to save me.”

Kylo didn’t seem to know what to make of her hugging him. He stretched his arms out awkwardly and curled them around her. Only after a few moments did he sink into the embrace, pain flooding his eyes. “It was worth it.”

“I thought you weren’t capable of…that you didn’t understand—”

“Love?” Kylo shrugged. “Just because it was never given to me doesn’t mean I don’t know what it is.”

“Well it was everything to me. Thank you.”

Kylo gave half a smile and nodded.

Rey let him go, touched his cheek, and returned to Ben’s side.

Kylo looked Ben up and down. “Why did you save me? You could have just let me die.”

Ben shook his head. “No I couldn’t.”

“You should have.” Kylo hung his head. “There’s no point to me living. I have nothing to live for.”

Ben gripped his shoulder. “You do now, brother.”

Kylo watched him, reading. Trying to trust, trying to comprehend this insane turn of events. He crossed his arms and hung his head. “I don’t understand this. I don’t get you. I don’t know how to be with this.”

Ben patted his shoulder. “We’ll figure it out. When we leave this place, come with us. Let us show you real life.”

Kylo shrugged. “What about your father? I did push him off a bridge.”

Ben scratched his head. “Eh, to be fair, I think we all have wanted to push him off a bridge at some point.”

Rey snorted into a giggle. “It’s true.”

A smile actually curled on Kylo’s lips.

“We’ll figure it out,” Ben said. “We’ll talk to my father. It will be okay, you’ll see. I want you with us. I wouldn’t have saved you if I didn’t think you were worth saving.”

Kylo gave him a guarded look but nodded before hanging his head.

Ben sat and took a deep breath. He was wet, sticky cold, nearly died, and watched Rey and Kylo almost die, not to mention the crab incident. Hell of a day. Still, he was not going anywhere until they discussed certain things. “Rey, what is happening to you? I want to know everything. All of it. No more secrets, please.”

Rey sighed and folded her hands in her lap. “As you know, I’m the daughter of a failed clone. But my father wasn’t just a failure because he couldn’t meet the Force necessities of Palpatine. He also had a genetic flaw that in all other circumstances would have killed him before he reached adulthood. The hormones of puberty apparently trigger its dangerous effects. I don’t know the full details, but there’s something the cultists do with the cloning that has to do with Force capability, and it’s introducing the Force into it that buffers the effects of the flaw. The flaw causes the connection between cells to break down, which is why when you grabbed my arm, even if it wouldn’t have otherwise hurt me, it cut into me, like my skin and muscles had nothing to hold them together. The pain I was enduring was my body breaking down at once.”

Ben stayed silent as he listened, but his stomach churned, heart racing.

Rey continued. “And it’s been going on a while. The Force somehow counteracts this, provides an almost perpetual healing that keeps everything together. It was…supposedly intended to make a clone resistant to injuries, but well, those idiots can’t get anything right, apparently. The Force kept my father alive, but only for so long. His powers were never that strong, and by the time he reached my age, it wasn’t enough. While I’m not a clone, genetics are what they are, and I was passed that fatal gene.”

Ben sucked in a shaking breath and tried so hard to keep himself under control, to let her speak, even as his throat clamped shut.

“Luckily for me I was very strong in the Force. I never would have known anything was wrong until some raids got a little too crazy. It’s one thing to exert myself physically. A little rest and I’m okay. But when I use the Force, especially a lot of it, it pulls from what’s needed to keep me together. I got very sick a few times while with Shirac, enough that he actually brought me to a real medical facility rather than relying on Matty the grumpy med droid we had.

“They had no idea what was wrong with me and decided to do genetic testing. The results were so odd they couldn’t do anything for me. They’d never seen the added markers, nor the flaws. I had already been getting flooded by Palpatine in my head, driving me nuts, and was planning to confront him anyway, figured that was a good time to ask about my genetic problem seeing as that’s where it came from in the first place.

“That’s when I met Kylo, when I was sixteen. Again the genius cultists worked their wonders and gave him the same fucking genetic flaw while trying to introduce that Force component.” Rey shrugged. “At least I found someone who understood what I was going through. Those scars he has? They’re not from battle. Result of being grown in a tube, fusion that didn’t quite sit right. That’s why he bleeds from those spots first, his weakest points. One of the reasons he wore that helmet.”

Ben glanced over at Kylo. The younger man just stared out into the sea, elbow resting on one knee.

“Palpatine assured me he could fix me—fix us—that he was just so powerful, he could give me anything, if only…” She bore a bitter smile and shook her head. “…if only he was healed himself. If he returned to power, he could save me. That’s when he tried to force the dyad between me and Kylo. That…”

Kylo huffed. “Nearly killed us both when he tried to siphon our energy? Don’t remind me.”

“Palpatine realized it would never be enough. He set me out to find my true dyad, so that we, me and you, Ben, could go before him with our life-giving strength and return him to glory.” She gave a mirthless chuckle and looked up at the sky. “I could rule beneath him. It would be just like him and Darth Vader all over again. He promised me the whole galaxy, and even promised me the one thing I valued, the one thing I wanted—life. My life.”

Ben pressed his lips together to still their quivering. He was right. She did have a good reason to potentially betray him, just as he said.

“My mother was gone, my father was gone, and I was on borrowed time. I had seen nothing but crime and death and the ugliest side of the galaxy for my entire life.” She shook her head. “I didn’t care if Palpatine decimated the galaxy. It was garbage to me, anyway. I was ready to give him what he wanted.

“So I went hunting for you, Ben, the only one who could make this all happen, the only one who could bring this all to fruition, to save my life. But the…more I looked for you, the more I saw the galaxy in a new light. Full of people—all varieties and species—just trying to live their lives, trying to be happy. It wasn’t all pain and death and violence. And I realized they valued the same thing I did—life. They valued their lives, and they had a chance to live, unlike me.

“But that would end if Palpatine got what he wanted. I realized what I was doing was wrong. I was trying to save my life by endangering so many…and I didn’t have that right. Along the way I heard about the Resistance who had been fending off a militant group called the Final Order that was just starting to gain traction. I knew all about that and spilled Palpatine’s plans to them. That’s when I met Finn and Poe who decided to help me figure out how to destroy him, and I knew the answer lay in my dyad in the Force.

“I couldn’t find much information, but I did learn that yes, our dyad power could restore Palpatine, but it could also be his end. By that point, I knew he would never give me what I wanted. He would use us, like he tends to do, and throw us away when we fulfilled his wishes. But to be honest…his offer, the one that could possibly cure me, was never fully off the table. It should have been. I should have been focused on the _right_ thing, the _good_ thing, but like I said from the beginning, I was not a good person—until I met you.” 

Rey finally looked at Ben, and it was so hard to look at her because everything she told him made him hurt to his core, not for himself, but for what it meant for the both of them. “I don’t know how long I have left, Ben. My father was already dead by my age. Some days are good, some are bad, but I have no idea when it will suddenly just fall apart like it did for him. I just wanted to live, Ben. That’s the only reason I ever considered selling either of us out to Palpatine. I’m on borrowed time, and I just wanted…a full life, to fall in love, marry, yes, even have children despite my pillaging pirate self. And I can’t have any of that.” She shrugged. “At least the rest of the galaxy can if we defeat him.”

She took his hand, and he could barely grasp it as the realization finally started to take hold. “Ben, I was upset last night because I started thinking of all of this. I fell so deeply in love with you, and all I want is to keep being with you, keep loving you, have all those dreams just like you told me about the other night. And I realized I can’t have it, because any day soon could be my last, and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it except destroy the galaxy. That’s my fucking choice—destroy the galaxy or lose everything. I’m sorry, Ben. I wanted to tell you and didn’t know how, knowing how deeply you love and how fragile your sweet heart is, I knew it would hurt you so damn much and I didn’t want to see that pain in your eyes, knowing I’m dying—”

“Well that’s not going to happen!” The tears fell, and he didn’t care. “I’m not going to let that happen.”

Rey sighed. “Ben, if there was any other way—”

“My current area of study is in biology, specifically focused on genetics—remember? I said I had a DNA sequencing system I built myself? I wasn’t kidding about that. I know we’ll find a way—”

“Ben, I’ve been there. I’ve been to every top genetics doctor available. They can’t help me.”

“Well then they’re stupid or just don’t—they don’t know what they’re doing! I do! I—I know what I’m doing and I’m going to do it and fuck them if they can’t—”

“Ben it’s the Sith shit that’s fucked it all up, that’s why they can’t—”

“I’M NOT LETTING YOU DIE!” He sprung to his feet, pacing. “NO! I…I do NOT ACCEPT THIS! I do not accept it, no…I didn’t—I went—I can’t be able to do all this, everything, everything I know and have done just to not be able to—no, this is a science thing and because it’s a science thing I can figure it out—”

“Ben!”

“NO! Do you hear me? You don’t die on my watch! Not like this! Not…not…”

“Ben please—”

“Then we’ll give in to Palpatine! I don’t care, okay? I don’t care what happens to me, what happens to anyone, I DON’T CARE ABOUT ANY OF IT!”

“YES YOU DO! We will NOT give in to him, and we WILL defeat him and save this galaxy just like we were meant to from the beginning! That is why the Force put us together! That is what we are destined to do! And don’t you dare say otherwise!”

“What’s the point?! We save the galaxy but I can’t save you? That’s what this was all about from the beginning! Stopping him but preventing you from dying in the process! And now you’re saying nothing I do can stop it? What’s the point? Huh? WHAT’S THE POINT OF ANY OF IT?!”

He fell to his knees and buried his racking sobs in them, gripping his hair, angry, just so damn angry at a universe that would give him the best thing he could ever have and then take it away from him. Even if he did everything right, even if he defeated Palpatine and kept her alive, he would just lose her anyway. Why?!

He felt her arms around him, her soft body pressed against his back, and it just hurt even more. To know that this was temporary? This perfect heaven wasn’t something he could keep and cherish and adore for the rest of his life?

Her arms, her embrace, her whispering breath in between her own tears, apologizing over and over for something that was out of her control, that she couldn’t change and so badly wanted to. This pain was worse than any he had endured. His father’s betrayal was nothing in comparison. His perpetual loneliness, the teasing and hateful things spewed at him, it was dust, all dust in comparison to the real pain of having everything he ever wanted and now knowing it could be taken from him at any time.

And all because of Palpatine’s incessant bid for power and control. Ben had never wanted to destroy someone so badly in his life, but even that anger was nothing compared to the pain and overwhelming fear and helplessness.

Her embrace was its usual beautiful comfort but laced with so much agony cut by truth that he could find no solace, no balm, no rest as he kicked and flailed for a shore that kept getting farther away.

Then something else. A hand, a large hand, placed upon his back. Awkward but firm, meaningful. Ben looked up to see Kylo beside him, somber but caring, actually caring. Ben straightened and looked at them, both caught in a deadly endgame they had no control over, both rattled and operating out of the brief and temporary state of their existence, both wanting the same thing—to live.

Ben wrapped one arm around Rey and the other around Kylo and pulled them both into his embrace. Rey shook, sobbing, while Kylo felt so stiff and confused. But then even he softened, a little, not perfect, but enough. A muscular arm met Rey’s around Ben’s back. For better or worse, they were bound together, all three.

“I will find a way,” Ben whispered. “I don’t care what it takes. I promise you, I will find a way.”

“You can’t make that promise,” Rey said and sucked in a sob.

“I. Promise. And that’s all there is to it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, go ahead, throw the rotten fruit at me (hey, no coconuts!) I'm sorry I made you empty your tissue box, but we'll just have to put our trust in Ben (unless it calls for slippery steps and lightsabers) to find a way back to the light for everyone. I promise things will lighten up from here on out, hey, we had to have one soul-crushing chapter, right? OUCH! I said no coconuts!
> 
> But hey, come on, that moment with Kylo at the end, huh?
> 
> Oh boy, introducing Kylo to life on the Falcon - the comedy writes itself! And I'll try to have this upcoming chapter up a little quicker than this one so you can soothe the pain of this hellfest. I only took long with this one because there were so many complex character shifts going on that even I was having a hard time keeping track LOL and I had to check back in earlier chapters and make sure I wasn't retconning Rey's secrets. I'm hoping it made sense by the end of it. 
> 
> I hope Ben didn't come off too melodramatic when he found out Rey's first secret, I mean, she does keep saying she loves him and the offer was off the table as soon as she fell in love with him. But first, he's terribly unskilled when it comes to managing his feelings, feels way too deeply, and never had a real relationship before Rey. But also, I really wanted, for storytelling tension purposes (or I'm a jerk, take your pick), for it to seem like when he was protecting Kylo, he perhaps had turned against Rey. So anyway, if it seems like he was being way too dramatic over it for too long, it was story reasons. And I'm a jerk.
> 
> Next chapter coming up soon, and I promise we're back to laughs and mush (and a special visitor!)


	12. Ben's Baby Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In all fairness, Ben, the TIE Silencer really is a sexy piece of machinery. 
> 
> Ben brings Kylo home to the Millennium Falcon, and his big brother instincts are put to the test. Wallowing in the revelations about Rey and Kylo, a sleepless night brings some visitors.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please allow me to wash off the heartbreak of the last chapter with Ben at his most genuine and ridiculous once again!

Rey squeezed onto Ben’s lap behind Kylo in the TIE Silencer. There was barely enough room to breathe, but the delight of her rear squishing into his lower regions made up for any discomfort. They wouldn’t go far, thank the stars, only to the Falcon, and then Kylo was done with that ship. They at least had his Wayfinder, leaving the smashed one for Ben to play with, maybe even rebuild for fun.

“I know, Mom,” Ben said into his comm.

“Ben, I felt it,” Leia’s voice poured from his wrist.

“I know, but I’m okay now, we’re okay—okay as we can—we’re all alive, well, assuming Dad hasn’t gotten drunk and pissed off the locals, but I’ll check in with him soon.”

“I already called him when I felt it and you weren’t answering. Ben, are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m…fine, physically. Mom, I promise I’ll tell you everything when I see you. Things got hairy, I’m…I need to relax a little before I talk to Dad.”

A sigh, then, “Alright muffin, take care of yourself, I’ll see you soon. Love you, Ben.”

He swallowed, remember how close he came to breaking her heart forever. “Love you too, Mom.”

After that conversation, Ben distracted himself by reviewing the chemistry formulas for the concoctions in his pouches, needing to calm down before they returned to the Falcon. Explaining Kylo to his father would be a feat of impossible measures, and he needed to get himself under control to smooth that front. Just file it away, file it for later, stick it in the compartments to the side, the new ones that had to store all these new pains he didn’t quite know how to process.

He called Han on his comm and told him they’d be arriving in the Silencer. That seemed like the best way to not get shot down in twelve seconds. When they landed and the hatch popped open, it was Finn who aimed his gun first.

“The scar! That’s Kylo in there!”

Han drew his blaster, Chewbacca his bowcaster, and Jannah and her crew aimed with their tech-bows. Rey, always being Rey, stood inside the Silencer and drew up her two pistols.

Ben, always being Ben, stuck his hands up in full surrender. “Don’t shoot! Dad, it’s me!”

“And that fucker!” Han said.

“Yeah, but he’s with me.”

“Since when?”

“Since now! Please, just let us get out and I’ll explain everything. He won’t hurt anyone, right Kylo?”

Silence.

Ben clenched his teeth. “ _Right Kylo?_ ”

Silence until Rey kneed Kylo in the head. “Uh, yeah.”

“See? Can we get out now?”

Kylo slid out with careful, deliberate movements, eyes trained on the plethora of potential enemies around him. Rey hopped out as if nothing was happening, her guns still at the ready, and Ben climbed out whispering, “Please don’t shoot. Please don’t shoot.”

Ben led the way over to his father while Kylo kept his head hung but peered at everyone from between his black locks. Rey kept the rear guard, and Ben really hoped no one would accidentally shoot because he was pretty sure she’d take everyone out in seconds.

“Close enough,” Han said when they were fifteen feet away.

Ben growled at the sky. “Dad! It’s me! It’s us, we’re fine, we’re not—Kylo’s cool now.”

“Yeah, well no offense,” Finn said, gun in his hand, the other on his lightsaber hilt, “but we’ve been dealing with this asshole for a while in the Resistance, and I’m sure as hell not about to trust him.”

“Look, he’s unarmed; he’s not going to hurt anyone. I have his lightsaber.”

Han tilted his head. “Why do you have his lightsaber?”

“Well, he lost it in the battle.”

“Okay, but why do _you_ have his lightsaber?”

“I…um…I…need it.”

“Ben, is this the Dark Side shit coming up? Ben, you know we tried so hard—”

“Oh Dad come on! Not everything I do means I’ve joined the Dark Side! Lighten up on that, will you?”

“Well then what the hell do you need it for? I heard about them things, the red ones, they’re dangerous, why are you keeping it?”

“By the stars Dad, you are so annoying! I need it for Galacticon, okay? To go…with my…Vader cosplay.”

Han rolled his eyes and dropped his gun. “He’s normal, well, as normal as he gets.” He waved for everyone to lower their weapons. “Alright what the hell’s going on? I drop the two of you off to get a Wayfinder and you come back with a TIE Fighter and a son of a bitch?”

Ben put up his finger. “Technically, due to Kylo being a clone of me, he’s basically Mom’s son, so you probably shouldn’t say that. And, well, he’s yours too.”

Han’s face turned an inhuman shade of red. “I am not that thing’s father! Don’t even joke about that!”

Ben shrugged. “Well, if you’d like to take another paternity test—”

“Oh don’t you smartmouth me you little shit!”

“Dad, he’s my brother! Whether you like it or not—this is all your fault to begin with!”

“Oh, you’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Well your actions have consequences and he’s it! What happened to him isn’t his fault, and he needs us, needs a family. Like it or not, he’s your son and he’s coming with us!”

“My son?! Coming with us?! He pushed me off a bridge!”

Ben lifted his hands to get everyone’s attention. “Okay, everyone who has ever considered pushing this man off a bridge, please raise your hands now!”

Ben kept one hand up, Rey’s went up, Finn stuck up one finger he seemed ashamed of, and half of Jannah’s group, including her, raised their hands.

Ben flinched. “Shit, Dad, what the hell did you do while we were gone?”

C3PO said, “General Solo, I assure you I have never considered pushing you off a bridge, even at your most unkind.”

Han glared at all the hands raised and landed finally on Chewbacca. “You too, you traitor?!” Chewbacca roared a response and Han threw his hands up. “I apologized for that years ago!” Chewbacca added something else. “Oh come on, you can’t blame me for that one!” Another furious addition. “Alright! Fine! I get it!” He spun back to point at Ben, then at Kylo. “That aside, we can’t trust him! I’m not about to let anyone on my ship I can’t trust! He’s a dangerous Sith, no better than Darth Vader, and I’m not about to endanger our ship or our crew to pretend this creature is my son!”

“Well I promised him he could come.”

“Well too bad.”

Ben crossed his arms and stared down his father. “And I say he comes.”

Han folded his arms as well and stood within inches of his son. “And I, the captain of this ship, say he doesn’t.”

Kylo scowled and turned away. “I won’t go where I’m not wanted.”

“Just relax,” Ben said, still locking horns with his father. Rey thankfully stopped Kylo from going anywhere. “Dad, Kylo comes with us. End of story.”

Han leaned in closer. “No!”

“He goes or I don’t.”

“Oh not this shit again—”

“ _He goes_ , or I _don’t._ ”

Ben received a message from Rey. _You are so sexy standing up to your father like that. Keep going!_ He tried not to grin.

Han huffed. “This is big talk from someone with a crab leg stuck in his hair.”

Ben’s eye twitched. “You’re lying.” He felt every nerve in his body crawl.

“You want to bring a dangerous enemy on this ship to pretend he’s your brother when you can’t even breathe now that I said you have a _skittering crab leg_ stuck in your hair. What will you do when he goes apeshit and starts attacking us? Run? Hide? Throw your lightsaber at him?”

He hated when his father was right. “Yeah, okay, I’m by far the worst warrior that ever set foot on your ship, alright? I get that. And…maybe I can’t kick his ass, I mean, Rey sure as hell could, honestly, she alone will keep him in line, but…Dad I can’t let him go back to that place, not to the Final Order, not to Palpatine.” He leaned in close and lowered his voice. “Dad, something’s wrong with him, her too. They’re sick and…Dad you don’t know what I just saw back there, what I learned, and I can’t abandon him now, not after he tried to give his life to save Rey, after she did the same to save me.” Ben closed his eyes. “Can we please just talk about this? Alone? On the ship?”

Han heaved in a deep breath and waved him on toward the Falcon. He let his father get on first, and then right before he stepped inside, he bent over and shook out his hair, shoving his fingers through the strands. “Damnit Dad! There was no crab leg!”

#

Ben told Han everything in the Falcon’s cockpit, even accepting a sip of whiskey (but no more!) Han actually listened, only pausing to put his hand over his face, especially when Ben mentioned his slip and fall that nearly killed him.

“Believe me, Dad, I get it. I’m putting my trust in the man who tried to maim me numerous times already. But he’s just…it’s not his fault really, and I know he wants out of it. He wants better, and he wants to make amends for things he’s done. He’s…a total shipwreck, I mean, the guy is a lunatic, but his heart…he has one, and he wants to put it in the right place, and I want to help him do that. He should get a chance to redeem himself for whatever he’s done, work toward it, do what he can do to help instead of harm the galaxy. I have to do this, Dad. I feel like I…like I’m obligated as his big brother to take care of him and give him what he needs so he can choose the light for himself.” He clasped his hands together and put them to his mouth. “I have to do this, Dad. I have to save them both.”

Han let out the longest sigh and massaged the bridge of his nose. “Fuck, kid…” He shook his head. “I knew something was up with her, just couldn’t figure out what. This is…one pile of fuckery right here.”

“Yeah,” Ben whispered, his throat tightening again, “to say the least.”

Han pressed his palms to his eyes. “The old hardened smuggler in me says to run from Kylo and not look back, but Ben?” He took his son’s hand. “You have a nobility in you I admire.”

Ben lit up. “What? Really?”

“Maybe you care too much for your own good sometimes, but you’re a wonderful man who wants to do right by the galaxy, to do the right thing. I get why you have to do this, and I’m hoping to the stars I don’t regret saying this, but if you feel helping Kylo is the right thing to do, we’ll make room for him on the ship.”

Ben smiled, feeling the sting of oncoming tears. “Thank you, Dad.” He squeezed his father’s hand and clasped it with his other one before succumbing to his emotions. “Dad, what am I going to do? I can’t lose her.”

Han put a hand to his cheek. “I know, kid. Look, things ain’t over yet. She’s okay for now as long as you keep her Force up, right?”

“I guess.”

“So focus on what you have now. Hell, she could have been perfectly healthy and have her planet blown up tomorrow. Kid, the next day’s not promised to any of us. So you make do with the time you have now. And if anything can ever be done to help her, I know you’ll figure it out. I don’t know about fate or higher powers or anything like that, but the two of you came together for a reason with all your strengths that make up for the other’s weaknesses. Maybe she finally found what she’s been needing all along in you.”

Ben dipped his forehead to their joined hands. “This is all so hard. All of it. I never thought I’d ever have to be so much more than I ever was. I have to be so much stronger for her. I have to be everything for her, and I’m not sure I can do it. Dad, there’s so much at stake, so much pain, so much…death. I just wanted to make edible parachutes! How am I going to do this…how am I ever going to be strong enough for all this?”

Han leaned forward. “Ben, you keep saying you’re not strong enough. Did you ever stop to think that you are? That you are a strong, powerful, amazing man who maybe, just maybe, _can_ do this and succeed?”

Ben looked up at him, brightening. “You really think so?”

“Maybe I shit on you for years, but in the time we’ve had on this trip, I’ve seen you break right out of your shell and become so much more than any of us thought you could ever be. Ben Solo is not some weak scaredy-cat who can’t handle real life. He’s strong, and he’s courageous, and he’ll save the fucking galaxy and everyone around him, just by being exactly who he is. You can do this, Ben. You can.” He clasped Ben’s shoulder. “And me and Chewy will be there to make sure you see it through, got it?”

Ben nodded through his tears, overwhelmed by everything, some of it in a good way for once.

“Come here.” Han held his arms out.

Ben fell into his dad’s chest, crying and holding onto him, desperately needing his father’s strength.

Han pressed a kiss onto Ben’s head. “Damnit kid, I don’t ever want to lose you. Fuck, I came so close to losing you and didn’t even know it. I love you, kid. Don’t you…don’t you go anywhere, okay? You stay right where I can see you, hug you, and…argue with you about everything.”

Ben laughed and sniffled. “I’ll try, I promise.”

Han let him go and touched his cheek before sucking in a breath to still himself. “Alright, pull yourself together, let’s go fetch your…Kylo and get the hell out of here.”

#

While the rest of the crew prepped for departure (and Finn was off having a private moment with Jannah,) Ben stared at the Silencer. “We can’t just leave this.”

Kylo shrugged. “We can’t take it either.”

Ben stroked his overgrown stubble. “Or _can_ we?”

“The wings are too big. It’s too awkward to tow.”

“Or _is_ it?”

“Stop doing that.”

“You should say please, _please_ stop doing that.” The glare he received in response made him jump. “I’m just—look Kylo, when you deal with other people, there are certain societal expectations you have to meet in order to have a healthy relationship. I don’t know most of them, but ‘please’ is a very good place to start.” He still received nothing but a glare. “Okay, we’ll work on that one—DAD! I want to bring this ship!”

Han threw his hands up. “The hell you gonna stick that? Up your ass?”

Kylo made a weird coughing sound, and when Ben turned, he saw his kid brother was actually trying to laugh. That was a good sign.

“Dad, the Falcon’s a freighter! You can tow it. You towed Uncle Luke’s X-Wing.”

“It’s not the same. The wings on that thing are way too awkward to secure properly.”

“We can retract the wings.”

“It’s still gonna stick out way too far on the end.”

“Then I’ll take apart that section and stow it in the cargo hold!”

“You’ll never fit it!”

“Well maybe if you move your cases of whiskey out of the cargo hold, we’ll have room for it!”

“Well maybe if you get _your_ crap out of the cargo hold, we’ll have room for it!”

“Mine’s a necessity!”

“So is mine since I have to put up with you!”

Ben growled. “I’ll show you!” He pointed to Kylo. “Wait right here. We are not leaving without this ship. It’s…a damn sexy piece of equipment, and I’m not leaving it on this crab-infested craphole.”

Kylo rubbed the black exterior of his ship. “It is pretty damn sexy.”

#

Kylo tossed another piece of the Silencer’s wing onto the pile. “I can’t believe I’m taking my ship apart.”

Rey smirked. “Consider it a metaphor, shedding the old and embracing the new.” She nodded toward his pile of clothing. He was down to just his pants and boots. “Keeping the garb or tossing it?”

“Letting it all go.”

“Well, it won’t go far.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just trust me. Look, while it’s just you and me, let’s get a few things straight. I love and want to be with Ben, the end.”

Kylo sighed. “I know.”

“I’m still…touched that you would give your life for mine, and that you didn’t even hesitate. I’ll always love you for that, and for who you are, but it’s not the same kind of love that I have for Ben and will never be.”

“I get it.”

“Further, Ben and Han are extending a hell of an amount of trust toward you. Don’t do something stupid to break that, got it?”

Kylo heaved another piece onto the pile. “I have no intention.” He paused. “Ben didn’t have to save me. I don’t know why he did. But I owe him for that. This family thing he wants me to be a part of…I don’t know. I’m not sure I can do it. But I’m willing to try. He has more faith in me than I do.”

“Yeah, he’s good at that. He has a lot more kindness in him than I could ever muster, which is why I will be on your ass to make sure you don’t hurt him or any of them.”

Kylo stopped and leaned on the ship. “Do you think he can really help us?”

Rey shook her head. “Don’t give him any reason to think he can’t, but I’ve learned long ago not to set my hopes too high. He functions better when he feels like he can solve a problem, so just—let him believe what he wants to believe. He’ll be stronger that way and we need him at his strongest.” She tipped her chin toward Falcon. “Here he comes and remember, be nice to him. He’s doing a lot being kind to you after all the times you tried to kill him.”

Ben jogged over with a huge smile on his face. Rey’s heart skipped a beat. He was absolute perfection, even more so since she saw him come into his power.

“Almost done!” Ben glanced over the piles. “Kylo, you’re doing a great job with this.”

Kylo tilted his head, looking at Ben in confusion. Rey cleared her throat and nodded toward Ben. Kylo sucked in a breath and said, “Thank…you.” He glanced at her and she nodded.

Manners. They really had to start at the bottom with him.

Ben patted his shoulder, and Kylo flinched, ready for battle, yet just as quickly settled down. This would not be easy, but Rey was glad to see something good happen to her frenemy for a change.

And Ben made it possible.

Her big, beautiful, perfection of light, ripping apart the ship like he was the one who built the thing. When Kylo spilled her secrets, she truly thought it was the end for her. Without Ben’s love, there was no light. She was sure she lost it for a moment, when he felt that first blow of betrayal.

And then just forgave her. _Must have a good reason_. He loved her enough to have such faith in her, even when everything screamed at him to run away.

Ben hit a switch on his multi-driver. “That kind of connector needs a tool like this one.”

Kylo popped up the tool. “Oh, okay.”

“You’re doing great with this, picking up so fast.”

Kylo scratched his head and cleared his throat. “Thank you.”

Rey almost burst out laughing. To see Kylo like this, humbled and trying to be polite, hell, being treated with kindness and praise, the concept so foreign he stared at Ben in confusion every time it happened. And Ben, guiding and teaching as if he didn’t spend half the day trying to escape being cut in half by a red lightsaber.

He never failed to amaze her. Then she felt a punch to the gut when she thought of that horrendous moment, when she had felt something go drastically wrong and turned to see his lightsaber in his stomach.

Her light, her precious, precious light, the most beautiful being in the galaxy, moments from being stolen from her for good.

She would have given her life a thousand times over and suffered the final results of her condition for an eternity to save her beautiful man.

And then he glowed with such incredible power. When he had put his hand upon her and told her he loved her, she was terrified he was going to reverse the Force healing she had given him. Instead he just came alive, eyes sparkling like he knew the secrets of the universe, smiling like everything was okay, was always okay, and would forever be that way. She watched as the anxiety and awkwardness that was his signature underlying mode melt into the glory of someone so powerful it almost hurt to behold him.

When she felt that energy pour into her, flow through her, and back again, gaining momentum, gaining strength, she knew the true power of their dyad for the first time. The relief from the horrendous pain was immediate, her full flow of Force restored in moments. But that wasn’t all. It grew so powerful, it was unlike anything she had ever imagined. And he led her in it like a dance, so confident, so strong, he was like a totally different person but still so perfectly _him_.

It was one thing to see him in his full glory, another to see him extend his mercy to Kylo, yet someone else who didn’t really deserve it. Yet Ben didn’t care. He loved his enemy, seeing beyond the exterior and finding Kylo’s core, deciding it was good, and giving him a chance to make something of it. Not unlike Ben had done for her.

This incredible person hid in a basement from a galaxy that did nothing but try to hurt him. It was unreal.

“I BROKE IT!” Kylo screamed and threw the component.

“Don’t worry about it,” Ben said, “it’s always—”

Kylo roared and started punching himself in the ribs.

“Kylo! No—stop! What are you doing?”

“I must be punished for my failures!”

Ben grabbed Kylo’s arm. “Stop! STOP!” He cringed from the death-glare he received but didn’t run, which was impressive. “You don’t have to punish yourself!”

Kylo nodded. “Then you may strike me.”

Ben rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to—it’s just a signal router! Just a piece of machinery, okay? Bodies are a lot harder to repair than machines.” He reached out, a little nervous, but squeezed Kylo’s forearm, anyway. “When we have some time, I’ll show you how to fix it. When we make mistakes, we don’t have to hurt ourselves or each other. We just have to find a way to fix it, make amends, okay?” Kylo turned away, gave half a nod. “Okay. Come on, let’s bring the rest of this to the ship.”

As they walked off carrying hunks of metal, Rey couldn’t help but chuckle. Ben had a little brother to teach and care for, and Kylo had someone that wanted to care for him. In some strange way, it made her feel like maybe they might just win this war after all.

#

“Congratulations,” Han said, “we’re going to blow through fuel in no time because _you_ had to tow a damn TIE Silencer!”

Ben threw his hands toward the ship now secured to the towing area of the Falcon. “Do you not _see_ that beautiful piece of machinery? I couldn’t just let that sit there and rot!”

“What the hell are you going to do with a ship like that? You can’t fly! You remember what you did to the Falcon the last time I let you?”

“Well if you had just let _me_ fix it instead of the repair depot, you would have had it back sooner!”

“You wanted to replace the entire control system with one of your crazy concoctions!”

“It was better!”

Kylo leaned in toward Rey. “Are they always like this?”

Rey snorted. “All. The. Time.”

“Is this how a normal family is supposed to operate?”

“I wouldn’t know what a normal family is, but I do know they love each other. They don’t always see eye to eye, or enjoy the same things, or get along most of the time, but they love each other enough that these arguments are usually meaningless.”

“Well that’s just great,” Han said. “You got your Darth Vader costume, your red lightsaber, and a fucking TIE Fighter, and I’m not supposed to be worried you’re succumbing to the Dark Side?”

“It’s for GALACTICON!” Ben shouted.

Kylo leaned in toward Rey again. “What exactly is a Galacticon?”

“I’m…not entirely sure. But apparently you dress up as characters from movies and get autographs from actors.”

“But Darth Vader is his grandfather, not a character from a movie.”

“Apparently he likes the movie version of his grandfather, not his actual grandfather—honestly, I’m just as confused as you are.”

“And for the record,” Ben said, waving his finger like a madman, “I have stacked the parts of the ship in perfect sequence and form to fit while leaving as little empty space as possible, a feat you could NEVER achieve on your own without my calculations and geometric comprehension, and we still have plenty of room to train and fit my equipment. How about a little praise for once for my achievement?!”

“Achievement?” Han said. “Alright, I’ll give you that. Now, what’s your mother going to say when she finds out you have a Darth Vader costume, a red lightsaber, and a TIE Fighter?”

Ben’s mouth fell wide open as he gasped. “No! NO! Don’t tell Mom!”

“I’m totally telling your mom!”

“Aw Dad COME ON!”

Kylo scratched his head and turned to Rey. “I still don’t understand how he’s supposed to be powerful enough to defeat Palpatine.”

Rey twirled a lock of hair to her lips. “Ehhhh…not all power is brute strength. Sometimes it’s a big heart, an exquisite mind, and six-foot three-inches of man afraid of upsetting his mommy.” She tapped his arm with the back of her hand. “Let’s get you settled on the ship.”

As Kylo and Rey started forward, Ben stopped them. “Whoa whoa, Kylo, what about your clothes?”

“He’s making a new start,” Rey said. “I’m sure you have something you can loan him. You’re both the same size.”

“Yeah, of course, but…” Ben leaned in. “Are you seriously not going to use your old uniform anymore?”

Kylo shook his head. “That part of my life is over.” He headed forward.

Ben raced around him, gathered the uniform in his arms and ran toward the ship.

Kylo threw his arms up. “Why are you saving that?”

“Next year’s Galacticon!”

Rey snickered. “Told you your clothes wouldn’t stay there for long.”

Kylo turned his incredulous stare toward Rey. “Am I ever going to understand him?”

Rey returned her lock of hair to her lips. “Um…he’s like art, meant to be experienced and appreciated, not always understood.”

#

There was so much to do now that they were back on the Falcon. It would take possibly two nights to get to Ajan Kloss to rendezvous with the Resistance, and the workload seemed endless.

Especially with the weight bearing on Ben’s heart.

He tried not to think of it as he went about the rest of the day. A hot shower felt wonderful after being drenched, and he scrubbed his head extra hard just to make sure there really were no crab legs stuck in his hair. Kylo was mesmerized that he was allowed to take a hot shower. Even while he had the option on the Destroyer, he said he was so accustomed to forcing himself to endure misery to keep his dark power ignited that he didn’t bother to use it. Ben had a hell of a time convincing him to try it, but the results were worth the effort.

Kylo almost looked relaxed! Well, he didn’t look like he would snap anyone’s neck any time soon, so that was an improvement. Wearing Ben’s standard long-sleeved black shirt and pants, it was eerie to see a brooding version of himself skulking in every corner of the ship, watching everyone with guarded eyes.

“Come on,” Ben said to Kylo as everyone filed into the galley for a late dinner. “My dad’s cooking isn’t the best, but it’s edible.”

If Kylo pressed himself into the corner any deeper, he’d fuse with the metal. “I am not welcomed there.”

“What? Nah, that’s not true. Come on, come with me.”

“If your father shows such anger toward you, what will he do to me?”

Ben waved his hand. “Pfft! He’s all bark and no bite, but, you know, maybe you can break the ice, maybe apologize for, you know, pushing him off the bridge?”

“I don’t know how to apologize!”

“Well, you start with ‘I’m sorry.’ Then you can follow up with what you did that hurt the other person. And you can offer to make amends, to fix what you did, though I don’t know how you fix tossing someone off a bridge. We probably should have checked with Rey first; I’m not good at this.”

“Neither am I.”

Ben smiled. “See that? We already have something in common! We’re both socially inept!” He watched as Kylo dug his fingernails into his own arm. “Eh…some of us more than others. Come on, a little food and you’ll feel a lot better.”

He pulled Kylo out of the corner and did his best to pretend his younger brother wasn’t snarling at him. He pushed Kylo ahead on line to grab food and secured his special plate. “Alright, so grab a plate. I don’t have any extras of my special plate but if you really need it I’ll loan it to you but only for today, okay?”

“Why do I need a special plate?”

“Well, what if your different foods touch?”

“Different foods?”

“Oh boy. Never mind, come on, we’re right after Finn.”

When he pushed Kylo ahead toward Han, his father glared as if he’d blow the clone’s head off any second. Ben cleared his throat, tapped Kylo, and pointed to Han.

Kylo frowned in confusion, then understood. Forcing himself to a neutral face, he said, “I’m…sorry?” He looked at Ben and got a nod of approval. “I’m sor-ry I…pushed you off a bridge.” He looked at Ben again and got another nod. “Let me fix it.”

Han’s face didn’t change. “You don’t fix pushing someone off a bridge, and I’ll forgive you on my own damn time.” He plopped meat, creamy pasta, and vegetables on Kylo’s plate in a mess of anger.

Ben sucked in a breath, waiting for Kylo to explode and launch himself at Han. Instead, Kylo looked more confused than ever. “Thank you. You are kind.” He leaned toward Ben and whispered, “Why didn’t he throw me up against the wall and let me starve?”

“Because we don’t handle our problems that way.”

Kylo nodded. “So _weird_. What is this on my plate? I don’t know what any of this is.”

Ben groaned. “The same stupid thing we had at the beginning of the trip. Don’t worry, just eat it. Go sit next to Rey.” He turned to Han. “Da-a-ad! Why are we having the same thing again?”

Han pointed the serving spoon. “Because shut up, that’s why.”

“Dad, you know I get food boredom if I eat the same things too close together.”

“Oh by the stars and the universe, the royal prince has to eat the same thing he had not too long ago. What cruelty have I laid upon thee?!”

Kylo watched them with a twitching eye. “I am so confused right now.”

Rey pointed to his plate. “It’s called sarcasm. Just eat, you’ll get used to it.”

“I’ve never had anything like this before.”

“Relax, you’ll like it.”

Kylo forced a mouthful of pasta while Han and Ben continued to argue.

“Well don’t we have any crabmeat?” Ben asked.

Han growled to the sky in frustration. “All we heard all day from you is how you nearly fell to your death because you had a crab on you, and now you want crab?!”

“Well it’s different when it comes from a can! There’s no creepy legs to deal with!”

Meanwhile, the group at the table watched as Kylo shoved his food into his mouth, moaning in delight, making an unholy mess of himself.

“I am not your mother!” Han said. “I’m not going to cook five different meals because her precious little muffin can’t have this and can’t have that—”

“I didn’t say I couldn’t have anything! But when I’m at the ocean, I get a craving for seafood.”

Han slapped dinner onto Ben’s plate, disregarding the separating compartments. “You’re gonna get a craving for an ass kicking if you don’t knock it off!”

Kylo licked his plate while Rey stared at him, horrified. “Kylo, get a hold of yourself.”

Finn couldn’t stop snickering as he held up his comm. “Oh I am so recording this dinner. This is the best one yet!”

“Come on!” Ben cried. “I almost died today! The least you could go is give me crab.”

“You almost died _because_ of a crab!” Han shouted.

“I meant when I fell on my lightsaber!”

“Who falls on their own lightsaber?!”

Kylo leapt over the table and stopped at Han, heaving breaths. “Your cooking is the best thing I have ever tasted in my entire life.”

Han pointed to Kylo and looked at Ben. “The one who tried to kill me is the one that’s actually grateful!”

Ben clenched his teeth. “I didn’t say I wasn’t grateful; I just said I wanted crab!”

Kylo grabbed his plate. “Then give me yours.”

Ben pulled back. “No! I still want it, just with crab—”

Kylo pulled and sneered. “You don’t know how to appreciate it!”

Ben pointed his fork. “Yes I do!”

Kylo growled, and Ben screamed, relinquishing his plate. He darted out of the galley and into the pantry to hide. As he read through the can labels to calm himself, he heard Rey’s commanding voice. “Give it back RIGHT NOW!” A bang, a screech of a chair, then Rey’s lovely voice again. “Ben, you can come back now.”

Ben grabbed a can and sauntered back into the galley as if he didn’t previously go running for his life. At the table, Kylo sat pouting, Finn couldn’t stop laughing, and Chewbacca held his head in his hands like he couldn’t believe dinner time could get any worse. Rey had that sweet, gentle face about her as she patted the chair next to her, Ben’s special plate still full and waiting.

Ben slid in, smooth and professional, pretending his nerves weren’t still dancing on edge. He sat and cleared his throat.

Rey poked Kylo, who crossed his arms. “I am…sorry I stole your dinner.”

Ben smiled. “I forgive you, Kylo.”

“I’ve…never eaten anything like this before. It was good. I’ve never tasted anything good before.”

 _Poor guy…_ “Um, here.” Ben pulled the lid from the can he was carrying and forked half of it onto Kylo’s empty plate.

Kylo widened his eyes in confusion. “Why would you give this to me? I frightened you.”

“Everything frightens me,” Ben muttered. “Look you…I…you led a much harder life than I did. It’s your first day trying to fit in. You…could stand to have some kindness shown to you.”

Kylo’s eyes darted in confusion, but he nodded and took a forkful of the flaky, moist substance. His eyes closed and he moaned once again. “So good. What is this?”

Ben held the can up to show the label. “I found the canned crab!”

Finn crackled into laughter and Rey joined him. She rubbed her palms on her forehead. “What a fucking day.”

#

Ben gave Kylo his bunk and curled up with Rey in hers. They kept the bunk door open, having already agreed to keep watch over their enemy turned ally. But Ben honestly had no desire to pay attention to his brother. Away from the crew, the tasks, and everything else, it was just him and Rey, and the weight of the day’s revelations lay heavy.

“Hope you don’t mind me squeezing into your bunk with you,” he said as she nuzzled beneath his chin.

“This is all I want.”

Ben stroked the smooth curvature of her arm then drew his hand over her shoulder, across the tank top strap, up to the warmth of her neck and behind to her hairline. There he slid his fingertips through the downy hairs, wanting to savor every part of her, wanting to make sure he remembered…always…

He inhaled the scent of her hair and filed that in his precious memories, the silken feel of it on his lips, the fluffiness of her waves.

What the hell ever would he do without her?!

 _Don’t do that,_ he felt in his head. _I’m fine right now._

_I know. I just…_

_Ben, you can’t do this to yourself. You’re strong now, so much stronger than ever before. Our dyad is almost at full strength, and that will keep me going more than anything ever has. For all we know, it could keep me going for years, decades. You becoming your true and whole self may just be what saves my life. Remember, our power is like life itself. You will sustain me, okay? So rest. We have a lot more to face in the coming days._

He pulled back to look at her face. _I’m not at full power?_

Her fingers traced his cheek, like flower petals nodding in the wind. _Almost, so very close, I can feel it. There’s one more barrier to break through, one more step in your wholeness that will release the suppression._

_I always thought it would be skill and knowledge that broke the suppression, but that’s not the case at all. My love for you is breaking it more than anything._

_Your love is one of your greatest strengths, one that gives you courage, tenacity, and power, all things you did not exercise before. Perhaps the suppression ritual is individual, centering on what a person needs most to become whole in order to break the hold._

_I will find a way to help you, and because I love you, nothing will stop me. I promise you that._

_And I promise I will cherish every moment I spend with you._

Ben smiled. _I promise that too._

Rey closed her eyes. _I’m exhausted. This was a rough day._

Ben kissed her forehead. _Sleep my darling. I’ll be watching over you._

Especially because he couldn’t sleep if he tried. He continued to watch her face, tracing every line, every little eyelash, the curve of her eyebrows, the point of her nose, the dusting of freckles on her cheeks. This exquisite little being of such perfection, here, with him, the most beautiful gift he had ever received.

He couldn’t let her go, couldn’t let her die. Not to Palpatine, not to the genetic abnormality the Sith caused.

He should have been exhausted and maybe he was, but his mind raced with so many scenarios and possibilities. There was a section of his Research and Development department that was dedicated to medical technology. Genetics wasn’t something they were currently working on, but it had been a field that fascinated him for years, hence why he was rounding out his expertise by adding biology to the mix. He should call Torbin tomorrow to start scouting for top genetics consultants. But even with that, the problem was started by Sith interference. It was the one variable that was throwing this all off. Without that information, not even the top genetic consultant in the field could help them.

Rey had already fallen into her deep breaths of sleep. Good. She needed rest, poor girl. They had to keep her rested and in top shape at all times. She had been taking care of him, but now it was time for him to take care of her.

He couldn’t sleep. He could absolutely not sleep despite all that happened in the day. His brain would not turn off, running through so many scenarios, reciting all the genetic research he had been studying. It seemed absurd that Sith interference could create a scientific genetic abnormality. The Force always seemed removed from pure science. The two shouldn’t mix, but it did. It did and what would he do about it? How would he get the information he needed?

They’d have to go on a quest after this was all over. Yes, a quest, all of them. Maybe his mother would come, too. The others could fight while Ben could help with his gadgets and chemistry. They’d fight their way through Sith strongholds and swipe the information they needed. A Force-wielding pirate, two smugglers, an unofficial Jedi, a former Dark Side warrior, a general/senator/princess, and a scientist surely could make this happen.

They were going to make this happen!

Ben turned onto his back. Now his mind raced with this grand crew he was going to create. Perhaps that TIE Silencer would come in handy after all. Maybe that Darth Vader costume would come into play. Kylo would be especially handy, for he knew the Sith more than anyone.

They’d have to delve into the Dark Side to find their answers, the one place he never wanted to go, but it was the only way he could find—

**Hello, my boy…**

Ben froze. It was so loud and clear. The voices before were subtle in the back of his head, but this one echoed in his mind. He returned to his train of thought, his crew, yes, they would call themselves—

**You know I’m the only one who can give you what you want. Only I know how to save her.**

Ben squeezed his eyes shut, panic gripping every nerve fiber. _Go away, I don’t want anything you have to offer._

**My boy, do you not realize what I could give you? Neither of you will die. Restore me and I will keep you both alive. You can have anything you want. You will have her for your long, long lives together.**

Ben breathed against not only the fear but worse, a creeping feeling that told him this was a great idea, quite possibly the only idea. What would he really have to give up, anyway? Palpatine could make so many dreams come true. He had the power, the knowledge, he could save Rey and Ben would never lose her—

 _GET OUT GET OUT STOP IT GET OUT!_ He slid his hand into his hair and gripped, trying to resist that rise of something that was both terrible and wonderful in his psyche, the type he felt while sitting on the throne in the Death Star. Tempting, so very tempting, clawing into him and digging at his good sense, his good heart.

**Why trade your life for a galaxy that hates you? Why give away so much to them? They’ve only made you miserable, mocked you, hurt you, and you put yourself in danger for them? Rule the galaxy with Rey and you never have to be hurt again. No one will ever dare to cross you again. You will be loved and honored and respected once and for all. You know you want this, Ben Solo. You want this more than anything.**

Of course he did—no he didn’t! It was so easy—no it wasn’t! No more pain, no more hurt, never losing Rey—

_I AM NOT THAT PERSON! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!_

**Ben, if you don’t do this, you’ll lose her forever, lose Kylo. Your parents are old, they’ll die soon, too. You’ll be left all alone in a galaxy that hates you. Don’t do this to yourself. Do the right thing, the only thing, the sensible and logical thing—**

_01100111 01101111_

**What—what are you doing?**

_01100110 01110101 01100011 01101011_

**What is this? Why are you doing this?**

_01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 01110011 01100101 01101100 01100110_

**Don’t be a fool! You’ll lose everything if you don’t—that is incredibly annoying.**

_Being annoying is one of my greatest strengths! 01100001 01110011 01110011…_

As Ben continued to say “Go fuck yourself asshole” in binary, the voices and cravings quieted. Calm settled over him once again as he embraced his intellect, the one thing he prided himself in. Delving into his systems programming knowledge brought him back to himself. Palpatine no longer found purchase to dig into his thoughts. Either that or the old fart’s head exploded. Well, if the voices came back, he’d try calculus and see if that killed his adversary.

He was so glad to be back in his own mind. Rey still slept peacefully beside him. Across the way, his new brother rested. He turned to look at his long lost sibling only to find piercing dark eyes boring into him in the dim light. Ben jumped out of his skin and Rey whipped out her pistol, ready to fire over him.

“It’s okay,” Ben whispered to her. “Kylo just scared the fuck out of me with his incessant staring.” Rey withdrew her gun and rolled over. Ben turned toward his brother and whispered, “Why are you looking at me?”

_This unfamiliar place is making it hard to sleep._

_Shit, we can still talk like this?_

_It must be because you healed me. Somehow the two dyads are still connected._

_So weird…_

_I also felt Palpatine’s dark power flooding in. I thought he was going to start in on me, but there were no voices, as if he has already abandoned me._

_That’s because he dug into my head this time. I’m not used to it, had a hard time getting him out, but apparently my favorite hobbies are irritating to everyone else. He ran from me._

Kylo nodded. _I wish I had learned a trick like that when I was young. I could never escape the voices, never stop being berated for my constant failures. No rest, no peace._ He blinked slowly. _This is the quietest my head has ever been._

_Not mine. Besides the uninvited visitor, I can’t turn off my racing thoughts. I keep trying to solve Rey’s problem, your problem, hell, our problem._

_How can you solve it in one night?_

_Well I…I can’t, that’s just silly._

_Then why obsess about it when you should be sleeping? You must be prepared for the battle to come. Rest is important._

_Yeah, well tell that to the fifty screens of information pouring through my brain at once._

_I don’t know what that means. But if it feels like ruminating over and over about your failures in a battle, that I do understand._

_Yeah, kind of like that._

_Your worry about us now is senseless. Facing Palpatine is your first priority, and he will not be defeated easily. She is more likely to die facing off against him than our flaw._

Ben pointed his finger. _I won’t let her die in that battle! I won’t! That is the one thing I swore I would not do, that I would do everything to prevent._

 _Then focus on that battle first. It’s coming soon._ Kylo rolled over.

Damn, his awkward, rage-infested little clone was right. All the genetic research in the world wouldn’t make a difference if they didn’t live past the battle. And why in his vision did she die in the battle against Palpatine?

Because they raced in there without a plan to defeat him. Well, he knew what _not_ to do. Now to make a real plan for what they _should_ do. And he was short of information there. He needed Rey and Kylo.

Tomorrow. He had to force himself to sleep so he could gather the information to formulate a plan. They were taking Palpatine down, and he would see to it they would live.

_Ben?_

_Yeah Kylo?_

_Thank you for taking me in like this, after everything I did to you. This is the first time I’ve ever had a sense of peace. I like it._

Ben smiled. _You’re welcome, brother. And I’ll make sure you continue to have it. We’re going to win, this battle and the one you and Rey share. We’ll make a plan, and we’ll find a way._

#

Ben woke every thirty seconds, or so he thought, but his comm told him hours were passing. Too much plagued his mind, even in rest. In some dreams he found the cure but couldn’t find Rey. In some he had lost her, but Kylo still stuck around. In others, nothing was ever wrong with her, she was just some abandoned scavenger on a desert planet trying to survive when she came across that round little droid they had called BB8.

But this one felt altogether too real. He was on his father’s ship, but it was dark, abandoned. He just sat in the lounge, not knowing what to do, just trapped in the darkness, alone.

The crushing loneliness reached a breaking point where he just curled in on himself and wept into his knees. He hated this place, this cold, empty place from which he could not escape. He just wanted to get back to his family, get back to Rey. But somehow, he felt like he had done this to himself.

The room lit in a soft blue. Ben wiped his eyes and straightened as a translucent man stood before him. Brown curls, cocky face, scar that reminded Ben of Kylo’s. The man’s robes were reminiscent of what Uncle Luke wore, but much darker.

“Hello, Ben,” the man said.

Ben gasped and leaned forward. “Day Havvens?!”

The man flinched. “Who the fuck is Day Havvens? Ben, I’m your grandfather, Anakin Skywalker.”

Ben tilted his head in confusion. “Oh. Ohhhhh, oh hey! Oh crap, are you here to complain about my Vader costume?”

“What?”

“Because I made it like the movie version, not authentic to what you had—it’s nothing personal, I just—”

“Ben, it’s not about a costume.”

“See the one Day Havvens wears has a bit more edge to it, giving it a more angular feel—”

“Ben—”

“And there’s more lighting like actually in the armor so it gives off the whole ominous red and black thing—”

“I—”

“It’s not that I didn’t like yours, but I just really liked the movie version, and I was afraid my parents would get upset if I went really authentic—”

“Ben, shut up, would you? This isn’t easy to do, and we don’t have much time together.”

“Oh crap, are you going to turn me to the Dark Side now? Because I got my powers back? Shit! I knew this was going to happen. Well you can forget it! Kylo’s a lunatic, and I’m not turning out like him!”

“I’m not—no wonder Luke calls me all the time through the Force questioning our genes. Listen! I’m not here to turn you to the Dark Side, I’m here to _prevent_ you from going there.”

“Ohhhh. Okay, talk.”

Anakin took a moment to regain his composure. “I’ve been watching you, Ben, especially as you’ve grown stronger in the Force. I know what Luke did to you—”

“Tried to kill me?”

“Please stop. I know Luke blocked your powers, and I thought that was a shitty thing, but now that Palpatine is latching onto you, trying to poison you, I get why Luke did it. But there’s no stopping it now when you’re almost at your full potential. I know how Palpatine is. I know what a manipulative bastard he is. He found your weakness in Rey and he will do anything to exploit it and get what he wants.”

Ben sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I know…I know what he’s doing, and I know it’s wrong. I’m just so scared to lose her. I love her so much and I can’t lose her, I just can’t!”

Anakin sighed and nodded. “I know exactly how you feel. I was faced with a similar problem. I had visions my Padme, your grandmother, was going to die, and I would have done anything to stop it. I let Palpatine use me, pull me to the Dark Side, expecting that he would help me get the one thing I wanted in my life—to keep my Padme. But Palpatine doesn’t make good on his promises. I…slipped, I attacked her—it was my fault—I slipped so far to the Dark Side, I didn’t even trust my own wife! I hurt her…so badly…and after my battle with Obi Wan, I was on death’s door myself. Palpatine, instead of helping me save her, drained her life force to give it to me, to get what _he_ wanted. Ben, he will always do what _he_ wants. I lost everything. The woman I loved, my children, and my soul.

“Don’t be like me, Ben. I know how tempting it is, to cling so desperately onto something you want you’ll do anything to preserve it. But the price is too high. Be better than me. Stronger than me.”

“You’re…Anakin Skywalker, one of the most powerful users of the Force of all time. How am I supposed to be stronger than that?”

Anakin smiled. “The Force knew what it was doing when it chose you as one half of a dyad. Power is just a small piece of what you have to offer, and you are way more adept at the Force than you realize. Your strength lies in all of you at once—your intellect, your ingenuity, your courage—yes, it’s there even if you don’t realize it, and most of all, your heart. Use everything that you are to beat Palpatine and make that your only goal.”

Anakin held out his hand and closed his eyes. “The strength and power I sense in you is so much more than you realize. You’re so close to being at your full potential, your full capacity. Your time with Rey has opened you up to everything you were always meant to be. If there’s anything left between you that needs to be said, done, or explored, now’s the time to do it. Open yourself to the full potential of your dyad and you both will be unstoppable.”

Ben tossed his hands up. “But I don’t know what else to do. I gave her all of my love to heal her, I thought that opened me up completely, but this final step, I don’t know what it is I’m supposed to do. What’s more powerful than giving all of yourself to save the woman you love?”

“Your connection to her.”

“…Yeah I still don’t get it.”

“Look, all I’m saying is of all the things I _did_ do, the one thing I _didn’t_ do was die a virgin.” Anakin smirked. “How many Jedis can say that?”

Ben opened his mouth to answer and just as quickly closed it. “I…was not expecting that answer.”

“And I’m not saying it’s the only thing that will work, but hell, can’t hurt, right?”

“This is…not the conversation I ever expected to have with a Force-ghost ancestor.” Ben grinned. “But I do appreciate it.” He took a breath and rubbed his hands over his face. “I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I can do what’s needed to win against Palpatine. I keep saying we will, but my track record? Falling on my lightsaber? Running from battles? I threw my lightsaber at Uncle Luke and ran!”

Anakin snorted and hid his chuckling behind his hand. “That was hilarious.”

“Well, from an outsider’s view, sure—but you see? This is what I mean. I just hope I can be the hero everyone needs me to be.”

Anakin shook his head. “With everything you can do, you still don’t see. Ben? You are a Skywalker, the best of all of us, and the one with the most potential. Rise to this challenge and show the strength of your bloodline. Be everything I could not, for you are stronger than I could ever be.”

Ben was floored, overwhelmed by what was just said to him. Before he could muster a word, the image of his grandfather faded. “Wait! Don’t go—thank you! I’ll…” He was alone once more. “I’ll do you proud.”

Ben closed his eyes and stood. “This Skywalker will rise. I promise you. Somehow…”

Ben snapped awake, no longer cold, no longer alone. Rey’s precious, soft body lay curled in his chest. He still had her. He still had his family. He still had everything, and it was up to him to make sure it stayed that way.

His own grandfather, Anakin Skywalker, the real Darth Vader, actually came to him to lend him strength to fight.

He just had an idea for his master plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anakin! Trying to stop Ben from making the same mistakes he did! Yet another character doing what they should have done in the Sequel Trilogy. I hope you dear readers feel a little better now after last chapter's tearjerker. Ben and Han arguing is always a source of endless fun. 
> 
> Anyone else want to give Kylo a hug? Just protect your dinner while you do it, you never know when he may run off with it.
> 
> And I'm with Ben. Every time I go to the ocean I wind up with a massive craving for seafood, especially the Jersey Shore (NJ, USA.) It has a certain scent to it that can't be explained, and no, it's not foul, that's the tidal wetlands off the Garden State Parkway or possibly the pollution dumping grounds depending on where you are... And I only once whined about it as badly as Ben and that was when we went to Massachusetts during lobster roll season. 
> 
> Hopefully this will tide you all over for a few days as I write the next few chapters. Next chapter, we finally get to our steamfest! And the chapter after that is a rendezvous with Space Mommy who gets to hear all about her sweet little muffin's big adventures (and gets a few surprises *cough* Kylo *cough*)


	13. A Wild Kylo Has Appeared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, can you really fight Palpatine with math?  
> Ben begins devising a plan to defeat Palpatine. But when Kylo gets bored, he gets bitey, and Ben is having a little trouble handling his younger brother.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised steam in this chapter but here's what happened. The steamy section got SOOO long that I had to split this chapter in two. So the steamfest will be released right after this chapter so you will NOT have to wait for the sexy fun!

The crew sat through another episode of Kylo inhaling his breakfast and moaning in ecstasy. Ben felt his father made the sausage slightly too crispy, therefore it was inedible. He offered it to his brother, who responded to this kindness with burning suspicion but eventually pushed out a humble thanks.

They’d reach Ajan Kloss by the next morning, so it was time to get to work.

Ben stood in the cargo hold with his five screens projected, waiting to be written upon. He turned to Rey and Kylo seated on crates. “The one thing our visions agree about is that we all ran in without a plan, but we won’t make that mistake this time. So we are going to formulate—” He wrote with his finger into the projected space, bright blue tracing from his fingertips with each movement. “—a plan that takes into account all possible scenarios. Ben plus Rey minus Palpatine—”

“Ben!” Rey said. “You can’t fight Palpatine using math!”

Ben spun with a wild look in his eyes. “Watch me!” He drew lines pointing to his equation. “This is just the beginning. We need to introduce some constants and variables. That’s where you two come in. I need to know everything you know about Palpatine, his strengths, weaknesses, the building, the cultists. Brainstorm. Any idea is a good idea until we rule it out. Every single idea goes up on this projection.”

Rey shook her head. “Ben, this is absurd.”

“Rey.” He his eyes burned with intensity. “I jumped into a chasm to save my father with nothing but contingency plans for a battle I knew nothing about. And I succeeded. Imagine what we could do if we know what we’re getting into in advance.”

Rey sighed. “I get it, I just…I never went into a battle like this. With all this. With…someone calculating its ability to work.”

“Then this is exactly what we need. Rey, we both had the same vision, and look how that turned out. I don’t want only one of us to walk away from this battle.”

“Neither do I.”

Ben took her hands. “That vision is what would have happened if we and those around us hadn’t taken the precautions they did. Yeah, it still irks me that Uncle Luke suppressed my powers, but I wound up liking the person I turned out to be rather than who I became in that vision. That formerly-evil mess and an angry Rey ran in there and only one walked out. Well, this time it’s different. Fate didn’t bet on my nerdy self taking things to a new level. It didn’t bet on us falling in love beforehand, really falling in love. It didn’t bet on a lot of things that have changed since that whole mess started. So let’s kick fate in the face and show it who we really are. And let me do what I do best.”

Rey sighed, smiled, and kissed his fingers. “Okay. We do it your way.”

“No, not my way. Our way. I can’t do this without you, and you have knowledge I can never have.” He returned to the projection. “So let’s brainstorm. Everything you know, both of you.”

Kylo broodingly raised his finger. “It’s open at the top. The temple. You can see the sky when you’re inside.”

“Perfect!” Ben jotted that down and circled it.

Kylo perked, pleased he could help. “The machine that keeps Palpatine alive, it has an arm that moves him around the room.”

“Machine, eh? Yes—YES!” Ben’s finger raced across the projection. “I want to know everything about this. More! MORE!”

#

By mid-afternoon, Rey was ready to rip her hair out from sheer boredom and frustration. Kylo had been pacing the cargo hold for a half hour, muttering, snarling, lashing out at nothing, aching for something besides the insanity Ben had up on those five projected screens. All of them were filled to capacity. Notes, suggestions, diagrams, and math so…so much math. How that even played a part she just could not understand. But Ben just kept muttering to himself, correcting things, adding things, and downing Hyper-Fuel in his madness.

“I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!” Kylo roared and wailed on a crate with a stick.

Rey sat up from her near nap and rubbed her face. “Alright, Kylo clearly needs some physical activity, and time is getting short. Ben, we need to train, you especially.”

Ben kept writing and muttering. “Uh huh.”

“Ben, save and quit.”

He just kept on going. “Yeah…what is the median temperature and climate on Exegol this time of year?”

“Shitty. Put it away.”

Ben gnawed on his thumbnail. “Maybe you’re right. We need more expert input on this. Tomorrow, when we meet up with my mother, she can add a new dimension to this. She’s a brilliant tactician.”

Kylo stopped smashing the crate. “Is she my mother too?”

“Yeah, sort of, technically.” Ben saved and collected his projectors. “You’ll love her, she’s great.” He smiled and took Rey’s hands. “I can’t wait to tell her about us. Tell her about everything. Will just be nice to see her again. With everything that’s happened…I just miss her so much. So much to tell her. She always knows how to listen to me, even when I know she’s bored out of her mind.” He perked. “Kind of like you!”

Rey grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him down for a kiss. “I don’t always understand what you’re saying, but you look so cute when you talk all excited and animated.”

Ben smiled with his pouty little mouth, still so puckered for a kiss that she had to give him another just to taste its softness. Kylo growled into a roar and smashed at the crate once more.

Rey let Ben go and rolled her eyes. “Hey Finn! Get your ass in here for training! We got a lot of work to do with these two.”

#

The thing is, Rey only went to the bathroom. That’s all she did. In an entire five minutes she did not expect this but probably should have.

Ben shrieked as he bolted from the cargo area, shouting, “NOPE NOPE NOPE! I’m outta here!” before throwing the crossguard lightsaber behind him.

Kylo flew out after, Ben’s blue saber lit in his hand, and reached for his black-hilted weapon. Rey stuck her hand out and snatched it before Kylo could.

“That is MINE!” Kylo cried with clenched teeth.

“And what did I tell you?” Rey said, hooking it to her belt. “You have to balance out your Dark power rage shit before you can have it back! He needs to up his power and you need to tame yours.”

“Up his power? He can’t even fight! COME BACK HERE!”

Rey pointed. “Go to the cargo hold!”

“But—”

“GO to the cargo hold!” She amped up her command. “And don’t make me tell you again.”

Kylo pressed his lips together, face trembling as if ready to explode. But he spun around and stomped back the way he came without another word.

Rey sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “Ben, are you hiding in the pantry again?”

Moments later: “Yes.”

“You can come out now.”

“…I think I’ll stay. It’s nice in here. Quiet. Lots of cans.”

“Ben, come out here right now!”

Ben’s head popped out from around the corner. After searching and deciding it was safe, he crept out in perfect silence.

“Ben, you can’t keep running from a battle.”

“He’s too scary. It’s not like training with you or Finn. I just can’t with him.”

“Ben, we could be in Exegol in two days. Things will get a lot scarier—what is that in your hand?”

He held it up. “I found another can of crab.”

Rey snatched it out of his hand. “Give me that! Now get back in there!” She pulled him while he whined and stupidly attempted to wriggle out of her iron grasp.

The last few steps she was sure she’d have to drag Ben but got him in the cargo hold anyway. Finn was just barely keeping his own against Kylo, sweat pouring down his face. Kylo slammed at him with relentless fervor, ragged breaths and a gleam in his eyes that said he was enjoying this little session.

“Pause!” Rey said. Kylo whipped around and withdrew to the far end of the hold, where he kept himself warmed up by twirling the blue lightsaber.

Finn deactivated his green one and braced his hands on his knees, sucking in air. “Holy shit…he’s good. Really good.”

Ben stuck his hand out toward Finn. “See? Finn can barely keep up with him. I’m going to die!”

Kylo’s dark eyes lighted on him. “You will die the moment you touch ground on Exegol if you don’t learn to FIGHT!”

“Oh yeah? Well if I have to learn to fight then…you have to learn how to do math!”

Kylo threw his hands up in animated frustration. “What the fuck good will math do me on Exegol?!”

“Hey! When we’re done killing Palpatine, there’s a whole new world waiting for you, and there’s loads and loads of math involved, so if you want to teach _me_ anything, then I get to teach you!”

Rey leaned in toward Finn. “I think I’m going to need to get drunk to handle this situation.”

“FINE!” Kylo cried. “I don’t care! Just turn on my fucking lightsaber and show it some respect by learning how to use it for once!”

Ben jutted his chin out. “I do know how to use it! You were just going too fast!”

“What in the fuck—the enemy is not going to slow it down for you!”

“Well I just started learning!”

“STOOOOP!” Rey screamed, making Ben duck behind Finn. “The two of you are going to drive me completely insane. Kylo, your points are valid, BUT! Ben is just learning. You had your whole life to train. You need to take it slower with him, make sure he is getting the moves and stances correct before you just start wailing on him. And Ben—”

“Please don’t yell at me.” He clamped his hands over his ears and looked at her with the sweetest puppy eyes.

Rey stomped her foot in frustration. “Your father yells at you all the time!”

“Yeah, but it’s not the same. I can’t take it from you…” He lowered his voice. “…or my mom.”

Rey sighed and pressed her fist to her head, not knowing whether to shake him or kiss him for an hour straight. He just kept looking at her with those anxious eyes hiding behind black fluffy hair, his soft mouth crumpled in concern, eyebrows turned upward. Why did he have to look so adorable when things were so dreadfully serious?

After a calming breath, she gently grasped his wrists and pulled his hands from his ears. “I won’t yell at you, okay? I guess…Kylo’s used to me yelling at him. Hell, everyone is. But I do need you to listen, more than you ever had before. Two days. We didn’t know what we would face on Kef Bir, and we didn’t expect the Destroyer, but we know what we’re up against on Exegol. You have to do this, Ben. Your life, our lives, the entire galaxy is at stake. You can’t keep running away from a fight.”

Ben shrunk against the wall and pressed his clasped hands to his mouth. “I don’t know how to do this. I’m scared, okay? I’m not like him; I’ll never _be_ like him. I’m out of my mind, I can’t fucking do this. I’ll just get everyone killed.” He leaned his forehead onto his hands.

Rey put the canned crab down and grasped his hands. “Ben, stop looking at yourself as who you were. Start acting out of who you are now. You’re strong, and you’re powerful, and while you don’t yet have the full training with the lightsaber like he does, you are _stronger_ than him in the Force. What you don’t have in one area, you compensate for with the other. You’re fast on your feet, strong in the Force, and have an analytical mind. You get snap ideas in the heat of battle and not only survive but thrive. Get out of who you were.” She handed him the crossguard saber. “Be who you are.”

Ben breathed, bearing the saddest, most defeated look on his face. Then he swallowed, nodded, and straightened, gripping the saber in his hand like it was always meant to be there. He stepped into the center of the hold and clicked the switch. Crackling red hummed to life, illuminating him in its Dark fire.

Kylo twirled the blue saber once as he drew forth, then stopped. “Is…that canned crab?”

Ben’s head whipped to the item. “That’s _my_ canned crab.”

“Yeah, but I want the canned crab.”

“Well you can’t _have_ my canned crab!”

Rey smiled. “Winner gets the canned crab.”

Two sets of onyx eyes lighted on one another. Kylo dashed forward, lightsaber arched and ready to swing. Ben thrust his hand out and flattened his brother against the wall. With a twirl of the red saber, he charged into battle.

Rey giggled and sat on a crate before nudging Finn. “Now this is gonna be good!”

#

Two sweaty replicas sat sharing the can of crabmeat while Rey sprayed their nicks and minor lightsaber burns with Ben’s wound sealer. She occasionally had to throw her own power into the battle, blocking any dangerous strikes or preventing accidental slips. But overall, Ben learned a lot and was probably the best she’d ever seen him fight, Kylo got his ass humbled a few times by Ben’s far superior Force potential but was satisfied with the physical activity, and Rey got to have at least a little hope that Ben wouldn’t get himself killed outright the minute they reached Exegol.

And now they moved onto the math lesson, which had Kylo kicking and screaming like a petulant child. But this is where Ben shone in that special way of his. For someone who argued constantly with his father, muttered about how stupid his peers were in the fields of science, and had gotten into more than one scuffle with Kylo since getting on the Falcon, he displayed the most incredible patience with the snarling, dangerous twenty-year-old.

“Kylo, it’s okay. No one gets this right away.”

Kylo lay flat on the floor and stomped his feet. “Math is not supposed to have LETTERS! Why are there LETTERS?!”

“Those stand for numbers we don’t yet know.”

“How can you do math with numbers YOU DON’T KNOW?!”

“That’s the way life is sometimes. You know you have to come up with an answer, but you don’t have all the data. Our brainstorming this morning, this is just like it.”

Kylo sat up, crossed his arms, and sulked like he invented the concept. “It’s too hard.”

“Hey, the training this morning? That’s hard for me. How you feel right now is how I feel when I’m trying to train. Understand? There are things that don’t come easy to us the first time, but we have to keep at it to get better, right?”

Kylo tucked his chin further into his chest and grunted.

Ben smiled. “Come on, try again. We’ll go through it together.”

And though Ben won the training session by tossing Kylo around with the Force more than anything, he had the graciousness to share his canned crab with his younger brother. The concept was so foreign to Rey, that someone would share their winnings, especially with someone as volatile as Kylo, but that’s who Ben was. Compassionate, kind, caring, and loving.

He would make an incredible father one day, a thought that stung. It was a gift she could not give him when her deadly gene could be passed along, and he so deserved it.

And she knew he would still have her anyway.

Just made her love him more as she brushed her hand over his damp tresses. Those midnight eyes caught her again, and she just melted, so in love with that face and the person inside. She never needed another gift because he was her ultimate treasure.

Ben went through the instructions again while Kylo paid stark attention. It was so strange to see Kylo in this manner. It was like an entirely different person from the one who was raised on Exegol. Sure, he still had massive rage issues and a lightning-fast temper, but shed of the expectations of being a warlord, he was basically a boy in a man’s body still trying to figure out his place in the world. And he latched onto Ben in a manner Rey never expected.

“That’s it!” Ben said, smiling. “You did it!”

Kylo’s eyes widened. “I got it right?”

“Yes! See? You were persistent, even though it was hard, and it paid off!”

Kylo’s eyebrows lifted and then, lo-and-behold, he smiled! Even though it was a replica of Ben’s, it somehow changed his entire face.

“You deserve a reward for your hard work.”

Kylo leaned in, intrigued. “A reward? What’s that like?”

Ben rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Why must everything in your life be so damn sad—you get something good, something you like and want, as a treat for doing excellent work.”

Kylo nodded slowly as he processed this information. Then his eyes darted down. “Can I have the rest of the can of crab?”

Ben sucked his lips in and shoved the can over to his brother. “Fuck!” He leaned his head toward the doorway. “DAD! Pack more crabmeat next time!”

From the lounge: “Pack your own damn crab!”

#

Ben waved his father into galley while he held a conversation with Torbin on his comm. He had his earpiece in to help him concentrate, especially since Chewbacca kept roaring at Finn at the holo-chess table. “Yeah, I know. I know…Look, all I’m saying is to start scouting…Torbin, we’ve always had a medical section of R&D, where the hell do you think the wound sealer was finalized? …Yeah…yeah…I’ll shift the budget over, the credits are there…Torbin, you’re telling me all the things we can’t do, I want you to take a step back and analyze all the things we _can_ do…What’s my rule? Huh? Don’t lose credits, that’s my only rule, and this isn’t a losing…I’m telling you when I’m done here, I’m going to have a huge genetics project and I want to get the ball rolling, so make sure R&D really focuses on completion while I’m gone so we have room…What am I doing? I told you, I’m on a mission to destroy Emperor Palpatine…yes he’s back, I said that when I left…No it’s not a roleplay thing, my mother is at the Resistance base right now doing her General Organa stuff and I’m over here building up my Force powers, I almost got them all back—hey, I finally got my lightsaber back from my uncle!

“…Yes, damnit, I just said this was for real! …His body is a clone or something…yes, real cloning, real genetics issues, this is what I’ve been saying this entire conversation…Why me? Well apparently I’m one half of a Force dyad and me and my counterpart are the only ones that can destroy him for good…Well that’s what I’m saying, if I don’t survive this battle, you won’t have to worry about the budget on this…

“Damnit yes I’m serious! He has an entire fleet of planet-destroying Star Destroyers ready to deploy unless I succeed…Torbin? Torbin calm down, why are you freaking out? …Well I plan to succeed, I’m not going in it to die and fail…Yes, Torbin, real end of galaxy shit if I fail—hello? Torbin?” Ben took his earpiece out. “Huh, wonder why she hung up. What’s up, Dad?”

Han shook his head. “I…came in for a snack and heard my son discussing business and honestly I’m still floored.”

“Why?”

“I’m…just getting used to the idea of my successful business owner here. Was a real treat to hear you in action.”

Ben smiled. “Well, you know, I wanted to get things moving on the genetics situation. When this is over, the first thing I’m focusing on is helping Rey and Kylo, that and the SOLO-chute launch, but Marketing will be handling the bulk of that.”

“Marketing, damn, listen to you.” Han patted his shoulder. “Good job, kid. Can’t wait to see your building when this is all over.” Han grabbed a container and left the room.

Ben rode the high of his father being proud of him before his hundred thoughts at once flooded in again. Research and Development…there was still some research he still had to do for this venture.

#

Ben spread out the remains of the Wayfinder on the technical station. With a projection from his comm, he recorded the parts in a database and cross-referenced with known mechanical pieces. “Strange mix of old and new tech. It’s as if it’s been upgraded over time to compensate for possible upgrades on the planet itself.”

He connected the parts to his testing equipment and recorded the results. “Power transmittal is less than what’s used in common electronics, carbon film resistors, and—”

Kylo raced over, his mouth wide open. “What did you DO to my Wayfinder?!”

“This isn’t yours. It’s the one from the Death Star.”

Kylo tilted his head in confusion. “Why did you keep it?”

Ben laughed. “Like I’m going to leave electronics behind. Wanted to open this sucker up since the moment I saw it.”

“… _Why?_ ”

“Why do you like smashing crates with sticks?”

Kylo nodded. “Good point.”

“Hey, go get your Wayfinder, I want to analyze it.”

“Ben, we need it. You can’t just take it apart!”

“Why does everyone keep telling me that? Look, if it was put together, it can be taken apart! Those are the rules I live by.”

Kylo crossed his arms and glared.

Ben rolled his eyes. “Okay! I won’t take it apart, but I do want to at least connect it to my tester. I need to find out how these things work.”

“Why though, I don’t get it.”

Ben looked up at him. “You said that Palpatine is connected to a huge life-support machine, right? Well I can’t test it when I’m there, to figure out how it works, so I have to make certain assumptions based on the tech I do have from the Sith—oh holy shit, where did your Silencer come from? Was it made by them too?”

“Yeah, they have all sorts of members from all walks. The engineers are the ones that came up with our Destroyer designs and the fighters.”

“Yet they still install externally purchased components, interesting…DAD!”

“What now?” came the bark from the galley.

“I need to get onto Kylo’s ship.”

“The hell for?”

“I need to analyze the tech.”

Han appeared and leaned against the doorway. “Oh, well just walk right out into hyperspace and hop on, what are you waiting for?”

“Oh, that’s all I had to do? Hell, I’ll go look now—”

“Damnit Ben, do you seriously have to be told not to walk off the ship while we’re traveling through hyperspace?”

“Well I thought you had it connected to airlocks!”

“Why would I connect it to the airlocks? Besides, _you_ keep stealing the damn airlocks for your experiments.”

Ben sprung out of his chair. “Oh shit! The Tor-flex!”

Kylo blinked. “The what?”

Ben grabbed his wrist and pulled him down the corridor. “Come on! Come see science in action!”

#

Hours later, Ben set his black shirt, matching pants, and boots out to cool after coming out of the mold. Kylo sat on a crate with a crooked brow while Rey bounced next to him.

“I can’t wait!” she said.

Ben tapped at his projection, eyes wide with excitement, and whipped toward her. “Go ahead. Pull the lever.”

He’d never seen a woman excited by his experiments before, but Rey gleefully jogged over to the molding unit and pulled down. White and gray Tor-flex poured into the system and dispersed to the armored outfit mold inside.

Ben took her hand and marveled at the image before him. “It’s going to be incredible.”

She leaned against him. “Not Rock-Hound standard, but something I’ve always dreamed of.” She looked up at him. “I don’t always believe in dreams coming true, but of any, you were the best.”

Ben smiled and melted, taking in that smiling, exquisite face of hers. “And you mine.” He leaned down and took those shining lips with his own. Locked in bliss, he sunk his fingers into her hair while her arms wrapped around his back.

A growl and slam into the crate jumped Ben out of his heavenly trance. Kylo had turned around away from them, arms crossed, head hung. _Crap, he had loved her too._

Rey picked up on his thought. _And I told him I was going to be with you._ “Hey! Knock it off! I’ll kiss Ben whenever the hell I damn well please!”

She received a huff and a grunt in response.

Ben felt for his little brother. _Don’t you think you’re being too hard on him?_

Rey rolled her eyes. _Ben, you are and probably will be the only one I’ve ever been nice to. I don’t change for anyone, and he knows that. And I’m not going to insult him by changing now either. He knows who I am and where I stand. He’s already being thrown for a loop being treated with kindness. If I start his head might explode from too many shocks at once._

Ben supposed he understood in a way. He and his father had a certain adversarial relationship, and after Ben had saved him, Han kept curbing his usual mouth-running and it just got plain weird. He had to convince his father that it was okay to go back to their version of normal, just without the original mean-spiritedness.

What Kylo really needed right now was a distraction. “Hey Kylo, fire up my lightsaber.”

Kylo sprung off the crate, eyes bright. “Training?”

“No, better! An experiment!”

Kylo thrust his head back and howled at the ceiling in frustration.

“I’m serious, come on! Fire it up, I have to test something.” He grabbed his new shirt, slid it onto a long pole, and held it out into the open area. “I want you to slice through my shirt.”

Kylo scoffed. “What for?”

“Just trust me.”

Kylo shrugged, pulled the hilt from his belt, and fired it up. Blue light hummed to life, and he whipped it through the air at the black shirt. It disappeared, leaving Kylo to lean in toward the pole in confusion. “What the hell?”

Ben clasped his hands to his mouth and smiled, his entire psyche bursting. “Kylo, look at the lightsaber.”

His brother held it out and gasped. The black shirt hung from the burning blue plasma, not melting, not damaged at all. “What the…”

Ben used the pole to pick it off the saber and pointed a laser at the shirt. “It cooled in less than two seconds.” He searched through the fabric, held it up to the light, stretched it in every direction.

Rey bounced up to him, just as excited. “Well?”

Ben clutched the fabric to his chest. “No damage. It’s completely intact.”

Rey screamed and leapt into his arms. He laughed and spun her around, delighted in his accomplishment and the fact that she was, too. Tor-flex was viable. His experiment worked!

He put Rey down and pulled off his shirt. “Now the test only I can do—whether or not it’s itchy and uncomfortable.” He slid the Tor-flex shirt over his head and squeezed it against his skin. “So far so good. Just need to see if I get hot wearing it.” He clenched his fists and thrust them into the sky, screaming in glee. “It works! It fucking works and right on time, too! We can wear this for the final battle!”

Rey nodded. “Yet one more thing our visions didn’t account for.”

He gazed down at her, feeling good about their future for the first time. “We can do this, Rey. I know we can. You and I going to go in there and win this.”

Rey shook her head and smiled. “You are a genius. A hero in every way.” She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him once more.

Kylo deactivated Ben’s lightsaber. “I’m coming too.”

Ben put Rey down and looked at his younger brother. His plan didn’t account for Kylo. “You can’t. Only Rey and I can defeat him. It’s too dangerous for you.”

Kylo scoffed. “I lived there, remember? I know the place better than anyone. You need me there.”

Ben strode over to him. “Kylo, you’re their enemy now and I’m pretty sure they know it. You go in there—damnit, I just got you in my life, I don’t want something bad happening to you.”

Kylo activated the saber once more and started twirling it in his training stances. “And I don’t want something to happen to you either. I will go with the two of you, and I’ll give my life to help you see it through if I have to.”

“What the fuck—Kylo, no! I don’t want that! None of us want that!”

Kylo glanced at him once and continued his training forms. “You showed me mercy, saved my life, gave me a family and a sense of peace. And in return I will give my life for you. What’s the problem?”

Ben rubbed his fingers vigorously over his scalp in frustration. “I don’t want you to die!”

Kylo paused and looked from him to Rey before twirling the lightsaber yet again. “And I don’t want either of you to die. That’s why I have to do this. Besides, the more you change the vision, the better our odds for success, no?”

“Yeah, I guess, but…”

Kylo turned off the lightsaber. “Ben, you’re at a disadvantage. Let me back you up with my skills. I’m going with you. I have to.”

Rey placed her hand on Ben’s shoulder. “He’s right. I think he’s meant to be with us. The Force is keeping the three of us bound together for some reason.” She nodded. “You’ll come. It’s where you were meant to be.”

Kylo nodded back, but before he could turn the lightsaber on again, Ben jogged over and put his hands on Kylo’s shoulders. He hung his head and sighed. “Okay, maybe you’re both right, but just…don’t die for us, Kylo. Live for us.”

Kylo flinched. “Huh?”

“Fight for us, but fight for yourself as well. I want all three of us to come home.”

Kylo frowned. “No one’s ever asked me to live for them before.”

“Well I am.”

Kylo’s eyes wandered, wondering what to make of it all. “Okay.”

Ben squeezed Kylo’s shoulders and patted him once before turning back to his work. He had to bring up the plans once more, had to get this right, and now, had to add a new variable to the equation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Kylo, I don't know why math has letters either...
> 
> Steam coming right up in the next chapter (for real this time!)


	14. Nothing will Stop Ben This Time!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You can do this, Ben!  
> When Kylo's drunken antics take an unexpected turn, Ben and Rey are finally left with time to themselves. Time...to themselves...if Ben can hold out, that is!
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of steamy, naughty, naked antics ahead!

Ben spent the rest of the day poring over his plans, taking breaks only to study the Wayfinder technology and because Rey forced him to eat. By late evening, he was starting to feel good about the current plan but really needed his mother’s input when he saw her the next day.

Unfortunately, while he was busy, Kylo was left with nothing to do and spent most of the time after dinner wandering the ship with his perpetual scowl.

“What are we going to do about him?” Ben asked Rey in the lounge. “He’s starting to creep everyone out with his skulking around and brooding, silent glares.”

“That’s how he normally is.”

“Yeah but…I think even Uncle Chewy’s getting nervous. They’re all waiting for him to just…explode into a ball of fire and long hair.”

“He doesn’t know how to relax, especially around others. I’m not sure which of you was a bigger mess, him or you when I first met you.”

“Oh me, definitely me. I admit that one fully.” Ben smirked. “Hmm…but I have an idea.”

Han plopped a cup before Kylo and filled it halfway with Corellian whiskey. Then he shook the bottle at Ben. “Come on kid, another round?”

Ben smiled. “Sure! I learned a few new geology jokes.”

Han pulled the bottle away. “Never mind.”

Kylo examined the cup. “This smells vile.”

Ben waved his hands. “Totally vile.”

Han filled his own cup. “Shut up, kid. Let the young man experience the fine taste of Corellian spirits on his own.”

Kylo narrowed his eyes. “Why must I drink this? What do you plan to do to me?”

“It’s perfectly safe.” Han tossed his back in one gulp. “See? Make you feel good. Unwind a little.”

Kylo turned to Ben. “Then why aren’t you having any?”

“Oh I get more annoying than usual, and I think I’m banned. Right, sweetie?”

Rey hugged his arm. “That’s right, my love. Just drink it, Kylo. Han, slide me some. Teach this man to drink like us pirates.”

Finn snorted. “No one can handle liquor like you pirates.”

“Except me,” Han said and filled Rey’s cup.

Rey took her cup and regarded Kylo. “Come on, like me. We’ll do it together.”

Ben pulled out his Hyper-Fuel. “I’m ready with mine! Come on, little brother.”

A very sour Kylo raised his cup to his mouth.

“On the count of three, drink it down in one shot,” Rey said. “One…two…three!”

Kylo downed the whiskey, squeezed his eyes shut, and growled into a bark.

Ben perked. “Hey, he handled it better than I did!”

Kylo put his cup down, eye twitching. “Well, now what?”

One hour later…

Kylo sobbed into his arms while everyone else just looked at each other, not knowing what to do. Ben put his hand on Kylo’s back and sobs turned into wails. Ben withdrew it like his brother was made of electricity. Rey massaged her temples, Finn tipped back in his seat waiting for it all to be over, Chewy echoed that sentiment, and Han just stared in confusion, probably wondering how his genes made for two men who couldn’t handle liquor to save their lives.

Ben tried again and put his arm around his younger brother. “It’s okay, Kylo. It’s okay.”

“No it’s not! Nothing’s ever okay! I just…I want…it’s just…WHY?! Just WHY EVERYTHING?!”

Rey put her feet up. “One thing I have to say for us pirates, we never sobbed through a drink.”

Finn shook his head. “This is just depressing.”

Kylo sat up and wrapped his arms around Ben, crushing him in a bear hug and leaning on him full strength. “I’m sorry I tried to kill you all those times. I deserved to get kicked in the balls, but that REALLY FUCKING HURT!”

Ben patted his back while simultaneously trying to escape. “I know, I know. Well, we all learned a good lesson, that brothers shouldn’t fight, right?”

Kylo squished Ben’s head to his chest. “That’s right, we’re brothers, and you treated me like a brother and cared about me and no one ever cared about me before and you did and brought me here and I tried to kill you so many times and I was just a real shit to you, Ben.”

Ben flailed and tried to wriggle out of Kylo’s iron grip. “My nose!”

Kylo let go and climbed over him, crushing Ben beneath his body while grabbing at Rey. “And I’m sorry I said all those things and made Ben mad at you and you were the only other person ever nice to me and I was a shit to you—”

Rey pulled out her pistol. “Get off me or I’ll blast you one in the face.”

“See? You’re always so nice to me and telling me how to act like a human being and I was just a jerk to you—”

“Help!” Ben cried beneath his equally giant brother.

Kylo rolled off of them and plopped onto the floor. Still sobbing, hair hanging in his face, he crawled over to Han. “I’m sorry I tried to kill you! You’re my dad and I tried to kill you!”

“Ohhh no,” Han said, “get away from me.”

Kylo leapt up and buried his face in Han’s stomach, sobbing and clinging to the elder man’s shirt. “I had to kill the only father I ever had but he was a real SHIT and beat me and never cooked as good as you!”

Han held his cup up high. “Get it off! Get it off!”

“And Ben loves you so you must be a good person because he’s a good person and I don’t know how to be a good person and no one’s ever gonna love me ever and I’m gonna be all alone and die in like two years and it SUCKS!” His entire body heaved with sobs.

Ben wiped his eyes. “We were supposed to loosen him up. This is turning out horrible!”

Rey shrugged as she leaned back against his chest. “Maybe it’s exactly what he needed. I don’t think he’s ever cried before. Perhaps it’s cathartic.”

“Figures,” Han said. “The wussy one thinks he can kick everyone’s ass when he’s drunk and the violent one turns into a sobbing puddle of goo.” He sighed and looked to the sky for strength as Kylo continued crying into his stomach. Finally, he patted the young man on the back. “There there. There there.”

Kylo gripped Han’s shirt and peered up at him. “You’re so comforting. My father never ever comforted me before.”

Han groaned and put his palm to his forehead. “Cripes this really is depressing.” He sighed and forced himself to hug Kylo. “Alright fine. You’ll be okay, kid. I’m sure somewhere under all that…violence and tears and snot is a good young man who just needs a chance to show everyone who he really is.”

Ben sniffled and smiled. “Dad…”

“No boo-hoos out of you over there! I’m up to my armpits in this one.”

Kylo actually smiled. He squished Han’s cheeks together and stared up at him in adoration. “You’re the nicest father I ever had! I love you, Daddy!” Kylo leapt onto him with a giant hug and knocked him right out of his chair.

Finn pointed to his comm bracelet. “Just for the record, I filmed all of this. Next time he gets out of hand, blackmail video.”

Chewbacca and Ben helped Kylo to his bunk while Rey followed behind, shaking her head. The young clone kept muttering and blubbering how sorry he was to the whole galaxy and lamenting that he’d never get a girlfriend.

When they finally got him to the bunk, Kylo threw his arms around Ben. “Thank you big brother for being my big brother and I love you and I won’t ever try to kill you again.”

Ben patted his back. “Okay Kylo, okay. Time for sleepies. Let’s get you in bed.”

Kylo threw himself at Chewbacca. “Goodnight, hairy Daddy.” Chewbacca tossed him into the bunk. Kylo splattered into the pillow and blankets and didn’t move.

Ben shook his head. “Was I really this bad that night?” Chewbacca nodded and grunted. “Thank the Force I don’t remember a thing.”

#

Once Chewbacca was gone, Ben put his arm around Rey. “Well, that was…clearly my genetics are unable to handle liquor.”

Rey nodded. “On that I can agree.”

He stroked her arm and smiled. “Aww, look at him. Isn’t he cute when he’s not homicidal?”

Rey laughed into his chest. “I don’t know what to make of you sometimes. Hey, we should stick his thumb in his mouth so he wakes up like that.”

Ben crackled into laughter and pressed his hand against his mouth. “Oh my fucking stars, he’d lose what’s left of his mind! Jeez, we probably shouldn’t. I don’t want to have to pull him out of that downward spiral.”

“Yeah, no one wants to do that, wind up sobbing all night again. You really care about him, huh?”

“Yeah…weird, right?”

“Kind of, but that’s what I love about you.”

“It’s odd to think that I always needed someone to take care of me, but then he comes along and the first thing I do is take care of him. It would be interesting to study the psychology of it. Maybe I should study psychology once I’m done with my biology PhD.”

“Why not, right?”

“That’s what I say.” He ran his fingertips up the smooth skin of her arm. “Lay with me a bit?”

Rey smiled. “How could I ever resist that request?”

Ben slipped into her bunk and pulled her against him after she slipped off her boots. Her back pressed against his body, they both lay staring at a motionless Kylo across the way. Ben breathed into her hair and kissed her soft silk. “Things are going to get crazy once we hit Ajan Kloss.”

“They sure will.”

He slid his legs along hers and nestled his hips against her bottom, wanting to be touching every possible bit of her. He kissed the shell of her ear and nuzzled his nose in from behind. “Things are quiet now.”

She kissed her petal soft lips against his fingertips. “They are.”

“We won’t have to worry about Kylo. He’s not waking up from that for a long, long time.” He kissed the soft, delicate skin of her neck.

“Very long time,” she whispered and ran her tongue up the length of his middle finger. That sucked a gasp right out of him and made him press up against her yielding softness. She squirmed in his arms and turned around to face him. “You know, when we were on the ruins and you were on that throne…” She sucked in a breath through her teeth. “If I hadn’t gotten worried about its effect on you, mmm, I would have let you done anything and everything to me in there.”

Ben drifted back to that moment, the way she walked to him, the way she regarded him, how powerful and commanding he felt up there, how she devoured him. He still had the marks on his neck from when she bit him and cherished them every time he looked into the mirror.

He smiled and gave a short, breathy little laugh. “I was out of control.”

Rey slid her leg over his waist, pushed him over onto his back and straddled him. “Fuck control.”

She dove onto him with an overpowering kiss that made him freeze in pure excitement. As his brain caught up to the overwhelming physical need for her, he wrapped his arms around her and slid his tongue so deep into her mouth she squealed and clawed at his shoulders. Her high pitched little breaths curled into growls that drove him so mad with desire he was sure he would bust out of his pants.

She broke from the kiss and whipped her hair back, eyes predatory, soft lips curled in a devilish smile. She shoved his shirt up. “Get this off. I want to see that body.”

Ben complied without hesitation, and as he was pulling it over his head, her hands slid up his ribs, through the hairs under his arms, and over his shoulders. She dipped her head to his chest, kissing, suckling, tasting, and inhaling before trailing her hot breath over his skin.

“You smell so incredible,” she whispered into his ear. She nibbled at his neck and ran her fingernails in a delightful tingle over his pecs. “I know you want me. I can smell it on you. Fucking sexy hot delicious man that you are.”

“Holy shit.” Ben gripped the blankets as the most overwhelming ache of desire flooded him. He had to have her, he just absolutely had to finally be with her tonight. Hell, his own grandfather suggested it! “Oh my stars, Rey, I want you. I so want you—I fucking need you—oh man—oh my stars.”

She slid her hands into his hair and gripped, forcing his head up and his hips to grind up against her. “Don’t tell me what you want. Show me.”

Show her? Oh he was liable to screw this up now. He analyzed her body, cross-referenced medical data with suggestions from his father coupled with anecdotal experiences and a whole lot of smutty fanfiction.

Rey tilted her head. “Ben? You okay? You zoned out.”

Ben shook his head to snap himself back into reality. He was so busy trying to do it right he forgot the point was just to enjoy one another. “Rey, I’m not experienced. At all.”

“I know and I don’t care.”

“I’m going to screw up, but please let me know if I do. I want to get it right.”

“You’re doing just fine so far.” She drew her fingertips across his brow and down his cheek. “Don’t worry about getting it right. Just be with me.”

That’s all he wanted. That’s all he really wanted, to just be with her in every way possible, be so completely one with her that everything else fell away. He reached up his tentative hands and wished he had the same abandon and bravery he had in the throne room. Now, back to himself—his awkward, nerdy self—he questioned every little movement.

He finally placed his hands upon her stomach and slid up her soft, curvy body, so warm and delicious, up to her breasts and hoped he was doing the right thing.

“There you go,” she whispered, and it made him drive up against her once more. Everything she did just made him scream with absolute need. He brushed his thumbs over her hardened peaks and shuddered at the soft gasp that escaped from her lips. He sat up with her on his lap and slid her top up. She wasn’t objecting to anything, that was good, and finally, he revealed the bra that held those curvaceous beauties in its silky hands. He pulled one cup down and just stared at the revealed loveliness, breath upon shuddering breath fanning across her skin. He caressed the other with his right hand while reaching out with his tongue, wanting and yet not sure if this was the right thing to do. Rey grabbed him behind the head and pulled him forward, his mouth engulfing her breast.

Oh yes, that’s what he needed. So pillowy against his lips, her breath hot in his hair as he suckled her with the utmost of care, loving the feel of her across his tongue.

“So good,” she whispered, sliding her fingers through his hair in that soothing way she knew he liked.

He continued to love her beautiful breast with his tongue while his fingers massaged the peak of the other. He couldn’t believe this was really happening. Someone loved him enough to let him touch her, enjoy her body.

Ben withdrew slowly, letting her nipple slip through his lips. He kissed her heavenly softness once more and peered up into her eyes. She had such wild bite in them, but she was keeping it corralled, just for him, letting him explore and figure it all out.

He shifted his hips and held her in his arms as he lay her down in the bunk. There really wasn’t much room to play with, but he adjusted just enough to angle in toward her. He slid his hand along her breast once more, then down her side, across her stomach, wanting, so badly wanting to feel her, really feel her, the thought of it driving him mad, but damn if he wasn’t so scared to, frightened he’d move too fast and piss her off.

She brushed his black locks out of his face. “You want to touch me?”

“Fuck yes!”

“Then touch me.”

His breaths picked up. “You sure?”

She glided her hand across his cheek. “Ben, there really isn’t a whole hell of a lot I _won’t_ let you do to me tonight, and of those things, trust me, they haven’t crossed your mind.” She grabbed his hand and pushed it lower. “You have free rein.”

Her hand guided him to her sacred mound, and when he felt the dampness between her legs, he had to stop and focus on something else. Despite keeping himself as “empty” as possible, the actual moment of feeling her for real and not in his thousands of fantasies made him nearly lose control again. _Come on, Ben, pull yourself together. You can do this. You_ will _do this and not explode before your time._

“You okay?” she whispered.

Ben swallowed and tried to still his shuddering breath. “I am trying so hard not to just fall apart already. You are _so_ beautiful. You smell so good—holy shit.”

“Shhhhh…” She petted his head, trailing her fingertips through his scalp again just as he liked. “Just relax. You can do this, Ben. You can do anything. So powerful. So strong.” She smiled. “You’re not the nervous, untouched, frantic guy I first met. You are strong in the Force, capable on the battlefield, and confident in your ability to do anything you set your mind to. You don’t have to be overwhelmed by me because you are also sexy and beautiful with this thick, muscular body of yours that I know is going to make me feel so good. Right?”

His jaw quivered in anticipation. “Uh huh.”

She took his hand, pulled it from between her legs, and slid it right down into her pants. His fingers traced over fluffy curls and into wet heat that triggered an inferno inside of him. Whatever made the difference, he no longer felt shy and diminished, as if she was giving him a treat he didn’t deserve. He felt like her equal. She wanted him as much as he wanted her.

His analytical mind drew up diagrams of the female anatomy to give him landmarks while animalistic hunger made his finger roam and find out for itself. He parted her waiting lips and slid in deep, her slickness making him imagine what it would feel like to finally be inside her, making him involuntarily grunt in desire.

She pulled him down so her mouth was right outside his. “You like how that feels?” Her breath was so hot against his lips.

“Uh huh.” He recalled the conglomeration of figures, anatomy, suggestions, and stories and sought out her sensual bud with his thumb while curling his finger inside of her. She gasped and bucked up toward him.

“Oh Ben…I like that…that’s perfect.”

“Oh fuck.” He kept mouthing the last word over and over, his body rigid with need. She liked it! He got something right! His head dipped down to kiss her, not even as deep as before, just to fulfill that connection. Ben was so rattled, so aching as her soft moans washed over him with every breath.

Her hand slid over his rear and gave it a good squeeze that had him arching his body toward her. Then it trailed around to his front, down and gripped over his manhood, the rush of pleasure causing him to gasp out of the kiss.

“Oh my stars.” He buried his face in her neck. “Oh Rey I want you, oh I want you so bad. I can’t take it. I need you. Ohhh…” His voice wavered and trailed as he tried so hard to hold himself together. He was _not_ going to ruin everything this time!

“Take me Ben.”

“Oh my stars…”

“Ben, fuck me right now—”

He pulled away from her, nearly falling out of the bunk, but kept his hand still deep inside her. Breathing…he could do nothing else but breathe.

She looked at him with a crooked brow. “Ben?”

“I’m okay.” His cheeks puffed out as he exhaled. “Just…give me a moment.” After a few deep breaths, he finally stilled himself.

Her fingers trailed through his hair once again. “So precious, trying so hard for me. You’re doing so wonderful.”

“I just hope I can hold up.” His voice was higher than it was supposed to be.

“Take your time. As much as you need.”

He hung his head. “I’m supposed to be better than this. I thought—I tried—”

“Ben! You’re fine.” She pushed his hair behind his ear. “You’re just fine. Just as you are.”

He arched himself over her. “Rey…damnit I’m going to make this the best night for you. I’m not going to fuck this up!”

Her fingers slid over his forehead, around his cheek, and along his nose. “Just be you. You’re all I want.”

She was so patient and loving, even while he was screwing it all up. No! He would not ruin it again. He was going to resist and be stronger than he ever had.

Ben dipped back down, devouring her with a kiss that made her suck in a gasp. Her hand gripped him once more, and he was so achingly hard, he swore no matter how many times he finished it would never be soft again.

Breaths picking up, she parted from the kiss and stared him down. “I want you to fuck me, Ben. Right now.”

Damnit, it was happening again! He pulled away from her reaching hand and gently withdrew from her pants. 

He had to buy himself some time.

“Nope,” he said, climbing out of the bunk.

She sat up with darkness in her eyes. “What do you mean, nope?”

He huffed and shook his head. “What do you think? You Sith girls can just come up into the Jedi temple and take whatever you want?”

Rey shook her head. “Come again?”

“Here I am, just an innocent Jedi boy trying to follow the rules, and you come in here with your Dark Side ways trying to corrupt me.” He pointed his finger. “Well I won’t let you!”

Rey leaned out of the bunk, squinting. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I will retain my innocence! You will never catch me, you bad, bad girl!”

With eyes saying she was in no mood, she reached for him. He darted out of the way and grinned.

Her eyes took on a tone that unnerved him, but her creeping smile made his perpetual hardness throb. “Come here, you precious little Jedi. Let me show you the power of the darkness.”

“Oh no you don’t.” He stuck his tongue between his teeth and bolted through the bunk room doorway. “You’ll have to catch me first!”

It wasn’t easy running while fully erect, but it’s just what he needed to calm himself. Besides, there was no room in that bunk. He wanted her, but he had to treat her right, just like his father said.

He skirted into the cargo hold, ducking around crates as she hunted him in endless pursuit, the hunger in her eyes so deep he wouldn’t be surprised if they turned yellow-orange soon. She had even put on her gun belt and lightsaber! Wow, he thought _he_ took roleplay seriously. He leapt over the last crate, thankful for his agility, and slipped back out of the room.

Ben just had to lead her to that storage area to get to the secret panel. They’d have to cut through the lounge. He turned a corner and nearly plowed into Chewbacca, forcing himself to stop.

Han sprung from the couch. “What the fuck—is Kylo after you?!”

Rey raced in and cornered Ben before he could get through the corridor to the storage room. She pushed him against the wall and grabbed his hair. “Oh you bad little Jedi boy, I’m going to make you pay now.”

Ben tried so hard not to laugh. “You—better leave me alone! If Master Luke finds out, he’ll get you good!”

Rey grabbed the waistband of his pants and pulled him toward her. “I will destroy him…” She traced a finger down his chest. “…and destroy you in a very different, more satisfying way.”

“Ho-ly shit!” Han said. “It’s happening. It’s really happening!”

Ben tried to suppress his grin, feeling terribly embarrassed while having the best time of his life. “You leave me alone! I’m very powerful. I’ll never let you take me alive!”

She slipped her hand behind his neck, and he really wished she’d let him out of the corner. “Oh I’ll take you alright.”

“Yes!” Han shouted.

Ben crackled into giggles and leaned in close to Rey. “We have to get out of here, this is getting weird.”

Rey snorted. “Well where the hell were you planning to go in the first place? You’re the one that ran from the bunk.”

“I—”

Finn walked into the lounge. “Guys, we really need to—”

“NO!” Ben cried, slipping past Rey, his finger out. “NO FUCKING WAY! You’re not interfering in it this time!”

Finn dropped his jaw. “What—where’s your shirt?”

“Get out of here! You’re not cock-fucking-blocking me this time!” He grabbed Rey’s lightsaber off her belt and ignited it.

“HOLY—THE FUCK BEN?!”

Ben roared and chased Finn out of the lounge, swinging the golden saber until he was long gone. “NOT THIS TIME! YOU HEAR ME? NO ONE’S GONNA STOP ME THIS TIME!” He deactivated the lightsaber and stood there panting.

“Ben!” Rey said, her chest heaving.

“I…may have overreacted—”

Rey leapt onto him, pushing him back against the far wall, and plunged her tongue right into his throat. She whipped her hair back and grinned with flames in her eyes. “Ohhh the fire in you is so fucking sexy I could just devour you right now!”

He smiled. “And I’m going to let you.” With her body wrapped around his, he carried her down the corridor to the storage area.

“THAT’S MY BOY!” Han called from the lounge.

#

Ben ran her into the storage room, pulled down the panel, and pressed his thumb against the reader. Rey jolted as the wall separated and dropped her jaw when she saw what awaited inside. “Oh Ben, you were holding out on me!”

He brought her inside, knelt on the bed, and set her down. “I needed to buy time. I needed to cool down a little, and I sure as hell didn’t want to bang my knees on the walls trying to do it in that tiny bunk.”

Rey looked around. “Well this will do nicely.”

Ben shut the door and put his hand to his head. “I…should apologize to Finn.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “ _Later_ , hopefully much later. Man…” She stood, looking around the room. “…this is impressive. Roomy for sure. What’s in the drawers?”

“I honestly have no idea. Dad showed me this room, said I could use it, didn’t explain anything.” As she opened the drawers to peer inside, Ben had a sudden realization. “Oh shit, Rey? I don’t have a Fert-stop device. I never needed—uh, I mean—”

“Relax, I have one.” She pulled open another drawer. “Hm, handy.”

Ben breathed a sigh of relief. “What’s even in there?”

“So far just supplies, not sure we really need…” She opened another drawer and smiled. “Hm, maybe, but not tonight.” She opened the final one and slammed it back shut.

“What’s in that one?”

She looked at him with wide eyes. “Never open that drawer. Well, I mean, maybe someday—know what, that’s just a side of your father you don’t want to see and I suggest we just leave these nice and closed.” She wandered over to a switch. “What’s this do?” She waved her hand over it and the disco ball started spinning, lights reflecting all over the room. “That’s…retro.”

“Dad said that girls like it.”

Rey shrugged. “It’s okay. What’s this one do?” She waved her hand once more. Panels in the ceiling opened up and leather straps with hoops fell down and dangled at different lengths. Rey stood looking at them with wide eyes and blinked once.

Ben scratched his head. “Uhhhh…”

“Yeah.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.” She sported a naughty grin. “Ben, stand up.” He obliged, and she pointed to two hoops near the bed. “Stick your hands in those.”

“Ummmm…whyyyy?”

She blinked with a fierce smile and nodded toward it. “Come on.”

Giving her one raised eyebrow, he slipped his hands into the hoops. They were loose, didn’t tighten on him at all. “Now what?”

She stood on the bed before him, and he already wanted to know what he did wrong. “Now you’re going to SUFFER for running from me, you silly little Jedi boy.”

Ben dropped his jaw. “Ohhhh shit.” It took all of three seconds to harden back up.

She paced the bed. “What will I do with you, huh? What punishment would suit disobeying a Sith Lady?”

He glared at her. “I will resist your powers! I will never succumb to you!”

Rey raked her fingernails delicately down his chest, sending shivers right into his groin. “Oh you will. You can’t resist my power.” She slid her hand right into his pants and grabbed hold of glory. “Can you?”

“Ffffff…” Ben swallowed. “…sure I can…” he barely said. “…I’m…stronger than…oh fuck…”

Rey pulled out, undid his belt, unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, and let it all fall to the floor. Her hand crept over the cloth of his black underpants while he gripped the straps to restrain himself. “I like these.” She kissed his stomach, fluffy petal kisses warm and delightful while he ached beneath her hand. “But I like them better off.”

Rey pulled his underpants all the way down, and the sudden realization that he was completely naked in front of a beautiful woman froze him. Her hands ran the entire length of his body, up his muscular legs, over his hips, along his side and stomach up over his pecs, to his shoulders.

“You’re shaking,” she whispered, drawing a finger along his jawline. She kissed his cheek, then his neck. “Such a beautiful man you are. I love everything about you. Such a strong, sexy body you have.”

Ben grinned briefly while his jaw quivered. “You really think so?”

“Very much,” she whispered into his ear. “I’d love to taste every bit of it.” She bent down and ran her tongue from his stomach up to his chest, over his nipple, and up his neck.

He shuddered and gripped the straps. “Oh holy fucking shit…”

Her hand wrapped around his manhood once more while her tongue flicked at his earlobe. “So good. Such a tasty little Jedi boy you are. But I haven’t finished tasting you yet, have I?”

His brain short-circuited. “Huh?” He wasn’t sure how his voice became that high pitched.

Her tongue ran back down his neck, down his chest, over his stomach, and on she kept going, and it wasn’t real or possible so it couldn’t be happening but his body kept feeling it while his brain kept telling him it had to be sheer fantasy—

Until he felt that heat, that warm, slippery, luscious heat envelop him as she took him into her mouth, the most incredible thing he’d ever felt in his life. He wanted to speak but couldn’t. He just gripped the straps to keep his knees from collapsing and tipped his head down to look at her. Her hazel eyes gazed back up at him while she loved his most sensitive part with such skill and perfection, the incessant train of thoughts in his head actually stopped. All he felt was pleasure, all he saw was beauty, all he knew was love.

And it was so…so…SO good he had to force himself to say, “Pause!”

She stopped and quirked an eyebrow.

Between his sucking breaths, through clenched teeth he said, “Let me go, quick!” Rey popped off and just let him breathe, let him calm. He didn’t start spewing formulas out loud this time, but they sure as hell ran through his head. When he started gaining control again, he tipped his head back and groaned. “That was the best thing I’ve ever felt in my life.”

Rey sucked her fingertips. “First of many.”

He chuckled amidst his groan. “Oh you make me feel so good.”

“You okay now?”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“I know you are, that’s the problem.” She slipped behind him and slid a hand over one bare cheek of his rear. “You’re a good, good boy.” She gave him a squeeze then a smack. “And I’m a bad, bad girl.”

He jolted, cheeks tingling with his blush. “Oh yeah?”

She cracked him again and rubbed it right after. “You silly little Jedi boys, goody little two-shoes—” Smack! “You need a little pain to teach you a lesson.” Smack!

They weren’t hard strikes, but it had its own special sting, one that kept fueling something in him, something familiar, reminiscent of the throne room when she bit his neck. With every strike it grew stronger. His shaking anticipation and nervousness started melting. Something else filled in, something stronger, more powerful, ravenous.

With one more strike, he pulled out of the straps, spun, yanked her up into his arms and pinned her against the wall with her legs around his waist. Something so aggressive and eager flooded his bloodstream as he kissed her deeply as to consume her. He threw his head back and sucked in a deep breath before gripping her top and pulling it over her head. She unhooked her bra (thank the stars) while a grin of wanton hunger painted her lips. With that tossed aside, he had those beautiful breasts all to himself.

He took one into his mouth with a little more power than last time, gauging her breath for how well he was doing. Those lovely fingers of hers sunk into his hair, soothing him with their magic but not taming the beast within. He grabbed her hair, pulled back just enough to expose her neck, and ran his tongue up its length.

“You belong to me,” he whispered. This all felt so unfamiliar, this other part of him, but it fueled the fire already raging in his body and he didn’t want it to stop.

Nor did she stop him. She didn’t look afraid or concerned. If anything, she seemed to be enjoying it.

She smiled. “And what will you do with me now that you got me?”

Ben carried her to the bed and laid her down. Ah, that gun belt, and for some reason he felt he had to do this carefully. With reverence, he unhooked her lightsaber, slid out one hefty gun, then the other before setting them on the table. Just as much care and attention went to the belt itself as he pulled out the loops and unhooked the clasps, his eyes gazing into hers the entire time. This was an act of trust, of pure intimacy, that a space pirate would allow a man to remove her weapons. With respect befitting the importance of the item, he placed the belt on the table and returned to her.

The love in her eyes centered him back in himself again. Connection, he started to understand it, what it meant between them. To be so vulnerable and open before one another was a new level of their relationship, one last step toward being one.

He gripped her waistband and pulled her pants off, leaving her underwear on temporarily. He wanted to look at her like that, just barely covered, a wrapped present with just enough of a peek to make him ache to see what was inside. He slid his fingers beneath the fabric, savoring the softness that lay against her skin. She lifted up just enough to allow him to pull them down, her sweet scent released and coaxing him onward.

Diagrams, anecdotes, one very uncomfortable conversation combined with a flood of hope and anticipation. This was his moment to really get it right.

He inched toward her, hoisted her knees over his shoulders and faced down, trying to understand the mechanics, wanting to make a good impression, and restraining himself from just slipping into her while her musk drove him wild. His fingers at least knew where to go, and based on their last venture in this playground, he knew what Rey liked in that regard. He teased open her soft heat and slipped inside, her gasp making his lower regions throb.

Ben inhaled through his nose and breathed out with his mouth as he tried his hardest not to mess this up. He slipped his tongue inside her lower lips, seeking, exploring, while her fingers stroked his hair. Further up, still seeking, he knew it had to be somewhere—ah! He knew he found her precious little bud when she made a soft little cry at his touch. Traced circles, fluttering flaps, and warm, long suckles, he made his beautiful woman moan with the sweetest little cries, his manhood aching with every one.

“Oh Ben…Ben…damn…how do you do that? So good…so…oh my stars…”

He smiled, basking in pride instead of fear for a change. He wasn’t screwing it up! She liked, it, actually liked it. This beautiful creature writhed in ecstasy because of him!

Her breaths picked up, and damn if he didn’t know how that felt. Then she let out a groan and tugged at his hair. “Ben, take me. I want you. I want you right now inside of me.”

He left her lower region and looked up at her. “Really?”

“Ben Solo, fuck me now like you have never fucked anything before and never will again!”

He didn’t know how long he stayed frozen like that, but shook his head to snap out of it and complied. He slid his fingers out of her and climbed up to her slinky body.

He was ready for her, hell, he never stopped being ready for her. Ben dipped down, kissed her long and slow, then stuck his tongue deep inside her mouth once more, fed once again by that hungry fire that burned through his veins. He nudged himself to her entrance, that slick, wet, warm gateway that made him shudder with just the simple touch alone. This was it, this was really happening! For once in his life, this was really going to happen!

With an arch of his hips, he slipped deep inside her and could have collapsed from that feeling alone. Deep throaty groans poured from the depths of his chest, and he finally had to break from her kiss just to breathe.

Rey tipped her head to the side, eyes closed, brow turned upward. “Ben…oh holy shit Ben…I knew you were big, but damn, this is fucking heaven.”

“Rey…” He could barely talk. It was incredible. It felt so good. Nothing else existed but them and their pleasure. His skin burned with heat, and he clamped his eyes shut, trying to keep himself steady and maintained, trying not to succumb to it all.

But he held out. It was torture how bad he wanted to just let himself go, but he held on, flooding his mind with formulas, calculations, rocks, anything to maintain control, to just keep pleasuring her even though he couldn’t take it anymore.

He finally had to slip out of her, dipping his head to her stomach as he breathed through another wresting of control over himself. After a few breaths, he slid down to pleasure her some more with his tongue, bring her closer to meeting him at the edge.

“Damn, Ben,” she whispered. “You are so good, so attentive. My precious man, trying so hard…” She stroked his hair again. “…you precious, beautiful thing.”

He melted at her words, her touch, her everything. This was the most incredible moment of his life, and all the insanity he endured was worth it to be here in this moment with her.

“More,” she whispered, and he knew it was time to return to her. He climbed up and dipped into her once more, thrusting deep into her, sinking into her softness that just tugged at him, making him scream for release.

But he held out, still he held out even as it drove him insane to do so. He jumped out once more, nearly losing his mind with the intoxication of desire, wondering what the hell he was doing anymore. But something inside of him knew to keep pleasuring her body, give himself a break, let it last, let the magic continue.

“Oh my—now Ben, please!”

He thrust back inside her and knew she could feel it too, hell, he felt it in her. He felt everything. His pleasure, hers, her entire essence inside of him, his in hers. Something was happening, some merging he didn’t quite understand but didn’t have to because it all made so much sense. Connection, perfection, the two becoming one, the two as one.

It gripped him and wouldn’t let him go, possessing his entire being in a whirlwind of ecstasy of the deepest and most meaningful, like the universe itself flowed through him.

“Oh Ben!”

Yes, couldn’t he feel it? Feel it overtaking her? Overtaking him? He knew he had to be fully one with her, everything, all of it. He laid his body against her, chest to chest, her legs wrapped around his. He caught her in the deepest kiss, everything, their bodies, hearts, minds, and souls as one.

When the wave flooded over him, he wasn’t sure he could take it and yet never wanted it to end. He cried into her mouth, her screaming into his, as the most incredible wave of perfection racked his body into a thrusting, shuddering release that made him feel like he was sobbing at the sheer unending rapture, something so beyond anything he ever could imagine, it almost didn’t seem real.

They were one. Fully and completely one with each other. One mind, one heart, one soul, their bodies merged, the perfect union, the dyad as one.

Even as that beautiful tide softened, abated, he still remained in her kiss, in her body, never wanting to leave or move. He breathed as if he just remembered how, shaking, shuddering breaths, wondering if he really had started crying at some point. He finally parted from her kiss but gave her two more as his body trembled, sweat dripping from the ends of his hair and sprinkling onto her.

Her fingertips traced over the dewdrops on his forehead. “Oh my stars…Ben…what was that? I’ve never…that was…”

“I love you so much, Rey.” And shit, he was crying, because he’d never loved someone so much that it overwhelmed his entire psyche.

“Shhhh…my beautiful man.” She brushed the tears from his cheeks. “You are just perfection, my beautiful Ben. I love you so much.”

He slipped from her and nearly collapsed beside her, still shaking but so happy, so purely in love and happy. She stuck her arm out and he nestled under it, resting his head at the top of her breast. Such pure comfort, he closed his eyes and basked in her softness. “I never imagined it would be like this.”

“You were wonderful, Ben.”

“I tried so hard.”

“I know you did, and you were amazing.”

He brushed off his cheek and started to laugh. “I’m sorry I’m freaking out like this. I’m so…it was the best thing ever, the best…I can’t even find words.”

“You don’t have to. I feel it too.”

He closed his eyes and nestled deeper into her embrace. They joined fingers, resting them on her warm, soft stomach. Connection, the likes of which he could never comprehend, he understood it now. Even if he was too tired to figure out how it would help him in the final battle, he knew their connection meant everything, for the battle and for each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Ben has finally graduated from muffin to hot, buttery cinnamon roll! This part of the chapter took me forever to write as I really like to take care with my steamy scenes so they don't wind up sounding ridiculous. At least Ben fulfilled the advice of his grandfather. 
> 
> I couldn't resist having Ben go after Finn LMAO!
> 
> And Kylo, poor, poor Kylo. I was laughing my head off while feeling horrible writing this scene, because on the one hand it's so sad but on the other just so damn funny (hairy Daddy LMAO!) 
> 
> Next chapter is probably going to be split like this again, as it's running much longer than expected. Our heroes arrive on Ajan Kloss, meet up with Space Mommy, and have one last day together before the final battle. There will be dice involved...


	15. Mad Mommy Mayhem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, you may want to consider how you phrase things...  
> Ben and the crew finally meet up with Leia, and the results are a mixture of heartwarming, inspiring, chaotic, and bruising! When Ben comforts Kylo, it creates a new dimension in their relationship, tested when Kylo's past statements come to haunt him. Ben finalizes his grand plan to defeat Palpatine.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Buried in Leia's dialogue somewhere is a quote from Carrie Fisher, because Space Mom :( The quote will also be in the end notes in case you don't catch it.

Ben woke with a sharp breath in the secret bedroom, feeling the buzzing of a message on his comm. His father’s face popped up, and he read the string of messages:

[Change the sheets. They’re in the bottom right drawer.]

[Don’t open the top left drawer!]

[If you already opened the top left drawer, you may have a lot of questions…]

[All I’m saying is that everything is consensual.]

[Look, when mommies and daddies…]

[I’m a pervert, leave me alone. Just change the fucking sheets.]

Ben was a curious man. It was to be expected of a scientist. But this was one area he really did not want to explore.

Rey nuzzled up from beneath his arm and whispered, “Hey.”

He wasn’t sure when in the night they switched snuggling spots, but he slept so soundly he wouldn’t have remembered anyway. Usually he was plagued by dreams of running from things or trying to solve problems and being unable to.

Well, this was one problem finally solved, and by an actual person!

“Hey yourself.” He kissed her forehead, and she snuggled up even closer. Oh if he woke up to this every morning, life would be a perpetual dream. He’d never want for anything else except for the pursuit of excellence in science and perhaps a large hadron collider.

And, of course, her health.

He tried to put that out of his mind. Kylo, for all his maniacal reactions, was right. Ben couldn’t worry about anything except the obstacle right in front of him.

Rey traced the few hairs on his chest. “Last night was incredible. No one’s ever made me feel like you did.”

“So I got it right?”

“You were beyond right. I’ve never been with anyone as good as you.”

He chuckled and rubbed her arm. “You’re just saying that.”

She looked up at him, and in her eyes there was no falsehood. “Ben, I mean it.”

The self-deprecating smile fell from his lips. “Really?”

“And especially for your first time?” She smiled and sighed into his chest. “I can’t begin to imagine what you’ll be like when you’ve had some experience.”

Well this day was off to a very good start! “Damn, Rey. Thank you.”

“The pleasure was all mine, and I mean that.” She kissed his skin, warm little peck that tingled in its softness.

He sighed and closed his eyes, never wanting this moment to end and knew it had to. “I guess we should get up, even though it’s the last thing I want to do.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“Hitting Ajan Kloss in a few hours, so much work before then.” He sucked in a breath. “And we have to start by changing the sheets according to my father.”

“Understandable. Come on, I’m hungry anyway. Better raid breakfast before Kylo gets up and starts trying to swipe everything.”

#

Ben pulled the covering off of a pillow. “Rey, can you toss me one of those pillowcases?”

Rey tucked in the ends of the sheet. “Hang on.” She picked up the folded fabric. “Here—hey, where the hell did it go?”

Ben looked down at the bundle already in his hand. “Uhhh…what just happened?”

Rey frowned. “Did you pull them from me using the Force?”

“No, I just suddenly felt them in my hand. You didn’t put them there?”

“No…what’s going on?”

Ben shook his head. “I don’t know, um…” He held his hand toward her. “Let’s try that again. Can you give me a pillowcase?” Rey picked one up, and Ben gasped as it disappeared in her hand and reappeared in his. “No fucking way!”

Rey shook her head. “What the hell is this?”

Ben could barely contain the excitement pouring through him. He held out the pillowcase toward her and had this lingering sense for a moment that he _was_ her. His hand felt lighter, and sure enough, the case was gone.

“Ben!” Rey bore a huge smile and held up the material.

Ben put up his finger. “I’m going to the cargo hold. Wait here.” Ben opened the secret door and burst down the corridors, flying past his father.

“Damnit boy!” Han called after him. “Two of you playing sex games again?”

“Later!” Ben skidded into the hold and closed his eyes. _Now, send it to me._ Moments later, he felt the weight of the pillowcase, fabric soft in his hand. He screamed in delight and ran back down to the secret room. Panting, he waved it in front of her. “It worked!”

Rey was just as excited. “How is this possible?”

“I have no idea, I…” It all started to make sense. “Our connection. That was the last step. You and me, becoming one—check my power level!”

Rey closed her eyes and reached into him. It felt warm and familiar, as if her essence always belonged to him, as if it _was_ him reaching in from the outside. Her face lit up. “Ben…it’s gone. The suppression is gone. You’re at your full strength.”

Ben looked at his hands. “Can any Force-sensitive do this? Transfer things? I’ve never heard of it in anything I’ve read.”

“Me neither. I think it’s just us, our dyad. It’s like I’m you, and if I’m holding something, you are too.”

“Like multiple dimensions existing cross-tandem with us!”

“…Yeah, that!”

“This could change everything. I may have to adjust the plans again. More contingencies are possible. We have to be prepared for anything.” Ben shook his head. “Grandpa Anakin was right.”

“Come again?”

“He came to me in a dream, or as a Force-ghost, or both, but he said we had to complete our connection with one another.”

Rey snorted as she fixed the sheets. “And he said banging each other would be the solution?”

Ben thought for a moment. “Pretty much, yeah.”

“Wait, seriously?”

Ben lifted his brow and nodded. “Yep.”

Rey pointed at him. “You have a very strange family.”

“Yeahhhh I do—Rey, do I ever want to know what’s in the top left drawer over there?”

Rey shook her head. “No. Just no.”

#

Ben munched on a bowl of cereal while Rey took a shower. He wished his father had brought the one with the fruity marshmallows instead of gritty old dad cereal, but food was food, especially after the physical activity of the night before. While he crunched away, he reviewed the summary of the current plan, adjusting with new ideas sparking in his head.

Han strolled in and plopped on the couch next to him. “Do you just wake up doing math?”

“No. Sometimes I do it in my sleep.”

“Of course you do. So? How was your first time? Just please tell me you didn’t cry during it.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Well…what if it was good crying?”

“Damnit Ben, come on!”

“Well I’m sorry, it was…perfect, just so…fucking perfect. I never loved someone so much in my life.”

Han sighed and patted him on the shoulder. “Well good. And you held up? No…preemptive explosion?”

Ben blew out a breath. “Held on by a hair. That was _not_ easy.”

“Well, it was your first time. The more you do it, the more you’ll get used to it, last longer, all that good stuff. Proud of you, boy.”

“I still don’t understand how this instills pride in you, but I appreciate the sentiment.”

Han pointed. “A man wants his son to be a man! Who’s capable in the bedroom and definitely doesn’t cry during sex—”

“Damnit Dad! I said it was a _good_ cry! I was just so in love with her, overwhelmed—you don’t know what it’s like to be in my head!”

Han tossed back a cup of _tornay_ juice, the only thing Ben had seen his father drink besides whiskey on this trip. “For that I’m grateful. About three hours until Ajan Kloss, then you can tell your mother you cry during sex. Maybe she can figure it out for you.”

“It was a GOOD CRY!”

#

Ben nuzzled the side of Rey’s head while they sat in the lounge, ducking lower to snuggle under her chin. She giggled and stroked his hair, planting a kiss on his head.

Han rolled his eyes. “If I wasn’t so happy my son finally had a real girlfriend, I’d tell you two to knock it off.”

“I can’t help it.” Ben traced his fingertips along her cheek. “She’s so beautiful.”

Rey slid her finger along his nose and bopped the tip. “And you are just adorable.”

Chewbacca roared, and Han waved him off. “Don’t barf. You should be proud of him. Finally moved on from sexbots.”

“DAD!” Ben said through his teeth.

Finn charged into the room. “Hey guys—”

Ben stuck his hands out. “Finn, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to come at you like that last night.”

“Oh, you mean when you chased me with a lightsaber like Luke once chased you? No, sure, that’s cool.”

Ben tilted his head. “Really?”

Rey shook her head. “No, not really.”

Ben, realizing the sarcasm was beyond his level of comprehension, turned back to Finn. “In my defense, I was really, really horny.”

“And a virgin!” Han said, his finger up. “Don’t forget him being a thirty-year-old virgin.”

Finn cringed. “Oh damn, really?”

“DAD!”

Finn put his hands up. “Look, all is forgiven, especially—never mind, listen, Kylo’s in there freaking out. I think he hissed at me.”

Rey put her palm to her forehead. “Oh shit, the hangover.”

Ben shuddered. “Oof, that was bad when I had it.”

She stood. “It’s worse for him, I should have thought of that before. He gets headaches, bad ones because of the faulty fusion. He must be in agony right now. Let me get him a med-tech and my hangover cure.”

Ben nodded. “I’ll go check in on him.”

#

When Ben entered the room, he found Kylo scrunched in the corner of his bunk, knees drawn up and glaring like a wounded animal. “Hey buddy,” Ben said softly, “not feeling well?”

“I’m fine,” Kylo bit out. “There’s nothing wrong with me.”

Ben climbed into the bunk, making Kylo shrink even more into himself. “It’s a hangover, and it hurts like hell, I was just there myself, I get it.”

“I am not weak!”

Ben slid in closer to him. “It’s not weakness to feel pain.” He reached over to take Kylo’s hand. “Let us help you—”

“DON’T TOUCH ME!” Kylo shrunk even further in on himself, coiled and ready to strike.

That jolted Ben’s nerves, but something else deep within pushed him to continue. “Hey, _hey_ , look at me, huh? It’s just me, just Ben. Let me help you. It’s okay to let someone help you.” He reached out. “Will you let me just hold your hand through it?”

He stretched out a little more, and seeing as Kylo didn’t bite his head off, he gingerly grasped Kylo’s trembling hand. “No one here is going to hurt you. That part of your life is over.”

Kylo eyed him, suspicious, confused, yet trying so very hard to trust. He squeezed his eyes shut, jaw set tight, and hung his head.

Ben took in a breath and touched Kylo’s shoulder. “Head really hurts, huh? Rey will be here any minute with something for the pain.”

“Medicine is for the weak,” Kylo hissed even as his shoulders shook.

Ben shook his head. “What the hell did they do to you?” He edged in closer and put his arm around Kylo’s shoulders, pulling his younger brother toward him. Kylo resisted, as expected, but Ben could sense Kylo needed this more than he’d ever admit. “Come here, just come here—Kylo, trust me, okay? I promise it’s okay to be comforted when you’re hurting—come on.”

His trembling replica finally relented, falling onto Ben’s shoulder. He was still curled in a ball, but at least he was a ball in Ben’s embrace.

“There,” Ben said, “that’s okay, right? Let me be here for you.”

Kylo said nothing, but every breath was deep and urgent, almost as if he’d start crying. But now that Kylo was sober, Ben didn’t expect to ever see that again.

Rey strode into the room, always so confident and in command. She set the cup down, climbed into the bunk, and held the med-tech out toward Kylo. He pulled away from her, shoving himself into Ben’s arms.

Rey, unlike Ben, showed none of the same gentleness. “Cut the shit and hold still.”

Kylo replied with an annoyed grunt but stopped trying to escape her. She rubbed the electronic over the area where he had the most scars, and he finally stopped shaking, stopped holding so tightly onto himself.

It was fascinating how Kylo responded to two totally different methods of helping him. Now Ben really wanted to take up psychology.

Kylo finally sat up, gave Ben a quick nod of thanks he seemed embarrassed to have to give, and took the cup from Rey. “What is this?”

“Cure the rest of your hangover.” Rey said stretched out in the bunk. “Drink it down; you’ll be back to your old self in an hour.”

Kylo’s eye twitched. “I don’t like alcohol.”

“Just a fucking hangover, yeesh, the two of you. I spent every damn week hungover since I was fourteen.”

Ben flinched. “Rey, that’s not good.”

“Meh.” She shrugged.

“Kylo, do you remember anything from last night?”

Kylo didn’t look at him. “Pfft, no.”

That was a lie. Ben could see it in his eyes. It was understandable to want to hide the fact that he spent the entire night crying, but strangely, he swore Kylo looked a little better, maybe a little more comfortable than the day before. Maybe catharsis is what he really needed after all.

Ben patted Kylo’s shoulder. “In two hours we should be on Ajan Kloss. When you’re feeling a little better, go get some breakfast. I have to work on our plan.”

Ben headed out of the room but stopped at the doorway. _Rey, call this my Dark Side coming up or what, but honestly? I hope every one of those Sith cultists is dead by the time we’re done for what they did to him and you._

_Some would say it’s the Dark Side. I would call it rightful justice._

Then, outside his bond with Rey but still quite connected. _Thank you._

Ben looked back at Kylo and nodded with a smile before continuing to the cargo hold.

#

Ben bounced as he waited for the Falcon to land on Ajan Kloss. He’d never been away from his mom for so long and couldn’t wait to tell her everything. That was one thing he missed so much, sitting down to dinner (when she forced him out of the basement) and just telling her about everything—his day, his experiments, how other experts were clearly stupid because they didn’t get something right.

The Falcon finally settled with a bump, and Ben resorted to jumping in place to corral his excitement. He caught Rey’s look next to him, a crumpled smile of disbelief. “What?”

“I’ve just never seen you so excited you actually started jumping up and down.”

He smiled. “There’s a lot more of my craziness to get used to. You’ve only experienced the tip of the iceberg.” He slowed back down to a bounce. “You may start to find me just as annoying as everyone else does.”

“If you start to annoy me, I’ll just kiss you.”

He smiled, but then it dropped. “Well then how will I know if you’re kissing me because you love me or if it’s to shut me up?”

“I’ll have my tongue down your throat. How much is it really going to matter?”

He raised his brow. She had a point.

The ramp finally lowered, and before it hit ground he leapt to the packed earth. Flanking his mother was that Poe guy, a woman with blond hair in braids, and BB8. Leia stood waiting, her arms out, warmest smile on her face.

Ben picked her up in a hug and spun her around. “Mom!”

“Oh my sweet Ben,” she laughed. He put her down, and she gathered his face in her hands. “Oh it’s so good to see you and hug you. How is my sweet muffin?”

Poe snickered and leaned toward the blond. “Muffin—see? I told you—OW!” He reeled from an invisible strike across his face. He rubbed his cheek and glared at the general. “Hey Ben, your mother has a hell of a Force slap, huh?”

Ben shrugged. “I wouldn’t know. She’s never hit me.”

“Wait, seriously? She’s done nothing but slap me the entire time!”

Rey sauntered up. “Well maybe you deserve it.”

Poe put his arms out. “How’s my favorite crazy girl?”

Rey stuck one of her guns in his face. “Still ready to shoot you if you touch me.”

He put his hands up and bowed, acquiescing. “No touch policy, got it—hey! There’s someone who’ll take a hug!”

C3PO waddled up. “Oh my, Master Poe, it is an honor—”

Poe bypassed him and threw his arms around Finn. “How’s my main man doing? Hey, how many standoffs did you have to break up?”

Finn shook his head. “Too many! It’s been one hell of a ride, but we got what we needed.”

“Excellent!”

Ben gently squeezed his mother’s shoulders. “Mom, I have so much to tell you, I can’t wait—I don’t even know where to start!” Leia glanced toward Rey, and perhaps his mother sensed it. Ben put his arm around Rey and kissed the side of her head. “We’re in love! Can you believe it, Mom? I actually have a girlfriend. A real one this time!”

Leia gave him the warmest, proudest smile and touched his face once more. “Oh Ben, I’m so happy for you! And Rey.” Leia held her hands out. Rey holstered her gun and put her hands in his mother’s. “I’m so glad for the two of you. I take it you’re a woman of incredible patience and kindness.”

Ben kissed Rey’s head again. “She sure is, Mom.”

Rey chuckled. “I’m really not, well, I guess except with him. He can be ridiculous, but he’s so darn cute.”

Ben leaned close to his mother with a scrunchy-nosed smile. “She thinks I’m cute!”

“See what I mean?”

Leia shook Rey’s hands and took one of Ben’s. “Well I’m so happy for you two. You’ll have to tell me all about it.”

Ben nodded. “I will, but first, I want you to meet someone.” Ben ran toward the ramp and waved Kylo down. When his brother didn’t move, Ben waved harder. Kylo finally forced himself down the ramp, eyes scanning the environment, twitching at every sound and movement.

Ben jogged back to Leia, whose eyes widened in confusion. He knew once he said his next words, she would absolutely fall in love because that was the kind of woman she was. “Mom, I have a brother!”

Kylo filed in behind Ben, not quite hiding or at least would never admit so.

Leia licked her lips. “Brother?”

Ben nodded. “Yep! He’s ten years younger than me, just like Rey. Can you believe I’ve had a brother this entire time and didn’t even know it?!”

Leia nodded, her jaw set. “Uh huh. Excuse me a moment.” She stepped toward the Falcon and climbed the ramp. Ben looked at Rey and shrugged until he heard his mother’s voice again. “PHILANDERING PRICK!” Ben heard a crash and his father shout. “YOU GO OFF FUCKING AROUND ON ME WHEN YOU TELL ME YOU’RE DOING A JOB?!” More crashing, more shouts of distress from his father, Chewbacca roaring.

Ben shook his head, wondering what in the hell was going on. Then it dawned on him and he gasped, biting his lip as he looked at Rey. He raced for the ramp and called up. “MOM! Dad didn’t philander! My brother’s a clone of me!”

Leia stomped halfway down the ramp and stared at her son with a heaping serving of displeasure. “Ben, next time, lead with that information.”

Ben shrunk into his shoulders with upturned eyebrows. “Sorry Mom.”

Leia put her fingertips to her head and sighed. Then she looked at him once more with a frown. “Wait a minute, a clone? How did you wind up with a clone of you?”

“Oh, the paternity test dad did to see if I was really his kid? It got stolen and Palpatine used my DNA to make a clone of me.”

Leia pressed her lips together. “Paternity test?” She smiled briefly and patted Ben’s arm. “Excuse me, son.” As she turned and headed up the ramp once more, she thrust her hand out. Another crash and Han started screaming again. “YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU TOOK A PATERNITY TEST?!”

Ben flinched at every crash and shout, wondering if he should go in there and do something. He’d never seen his mother this angry before.

Kylo slunk up behind him. “Do I get my anger problems from her?”

“To be honest, I’ve never seen her like this in my life!”

Leia’s voice carried out of the Falcon. “Calling me a cheater? Who the hell you think I banged that night, a fucking Ewok?!” CRASH! “Disrespect your son! Disrespect me! I don’t care if you were drunk! How could you do that to him?!”

One final crash followed by his father’s moan of agony, and Leia returned with a gentle smile on her face once more. She put her hand to Ben’s cheek. “I’m sorry about that, son. If I had known he’d done that, I would have kicked his ass much sooner.”

Ben rubbed the back of his neck. “I did sort of forgive him already.”

“I’m sure you did. You were always such a sweet, kind, and loving boy who couldn’t hurt a fly. That’s why I had to kick his ass for you.”

“Of course I wouldn’t hurt a fly. I’m afraid of them, remember?”

Leia rubbed his cheeks between her hands. “Of course I do, my sweet muffin.” She sighed and leaned to the left to see the man hiding behind Ben. “So, we have a new member of our family, do we?”

Ben stepped aside, leaving Kylo to panic in his sudden exposure.

Leia touched her fingers to her lips. “Ben, he looks just like you.”

“Yeah, he’s a clone. See, the DNA strands—”

“Ben, no DNA talk right now, please?” Leia reached for Kylo, but he backed away, hanging his head. “It’s okay, son. I…guess in a roundabout way, I’m your mother. I’d like to look into your eyes if you’ll let me.”

Kylo picked his head up, but his gaze could only hold to her for a few moments before it darted elsewhere.

Leia shook her head. “That scar, what happened to him—Ben, did you say something about Palpatine?”

Ben was about to open his mouth when Han came charging down the ramp, bag of ice to his head. He glared like never before, and Ben could only grin and shrink into his shoulders once again.

“Thanks kid,” Han growled.

Leia stuck her finger in his face. “I don’t want to hear it from you.”

Han smiled and placed his hand on her shoulder. “Well, my dear, I thought you should know your darling, precious, perfect little boy here has a Darth Vader costume, a red lightsaber, and a fucking TIE Fighter that you can see we’ve been towing.”

Leia’s wide, furious eyes turned to Ben, and he felt every nerve in his body explode into shards of glass. He balled his fists and glared at his father. “TRAITOOOR!”

“Ben Organa Solo!” Leia said through her teeth.

Poe whistled. “Ooooh boy, he’s gonna get it now. She went and used his full name!”

Ben’s entire body went numb. He blinked at her. “Mommy?”

Leia put her fists on her hips. “What do you have to say for—”

Ben clamped his hands over his ears and ducked down beneath his hair. “Mommy, please don’t yell at me—”

“What have I told you your entire life about him? Huh?!”

Ben’s heart pounded, and he let out a long whine. “Mom-no-please…”

“And you think it’s okay to go parading around like that? And now you’re getting into red lightsabers and TIE fighters?!”

Ben lurched into full panic mode, sucking in breaths and running through the endless decimals of pi to keep himself under control. This was bad, this was so bad. His mom was mad at him! His mom was _never_ mad at him!

Moments later, Rey appeared before him, fingers stroking his scalp. _It’s okay, Ben. It’s okay. She’s just upset, she won’t hurt you._

He squeezed his eyes shut. _She’s upset with ME!_ He tipped his head to her chest and wished he could just disappear and never have to face his mother’s angry face again.

“The TIE Silencer’s mine,” Kylo said.

Ben jolted and looked at his brother.

Kylo shifted. “The lightsaber, too. They’re not his.”

Ben almost felt like he could breathe again. Kylo was taking the blame for him!

Leia crossed her arms. “Oh?”

Kylo shrugged. “He’s not turning to the Dark Side if that’s what you’re thinking.” He huffed. “He couldn’t turn to the Dark Side if he tried.”

Leia’s eyes narrowed, but she turned back to Ben. “And what about the Darth Vader costume?”

It was Kylo who answered. “It’s just from the movie. He wanted to wear it to the Galacticon, for…autographs and…actors or something. The lightsaber, the Silencer, it was all to go to this event. It’s not for, you know, anything bad.” He shrugged again. “If you have to be angry at anyone, be angry at me. You may punish me as you deem fit.”

Ben was overwhelmed by his brother’s effort to protect him. He gripped the young man’s shoulder and smiled. “Kylo, you didn’t have to—”

Leia backed up. “Kylo Ren?!”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Uh oh.”

Poe drew and aimed his gun. “KYLO REN!” The blond in braids joined him, and soon a platoon of Resistance soldiers charged in, weapons aimed.

Rey, always being Rey, pulled her two guns and aimed them at the crowd. Finn, always being Finn, darted into the center with his hands out, trying to get everyone to calm down. And Ben? Always…always Ben, hid behind Rey and pulled Kylo down with him.

“Han!” Leia said. “What the hell is going on here?! Is this him? Is this _the_ Kylo Ren that we’ve been fighting against all this time?”

Han sighed. “Yep.”

“And are you telling me he’s a clone of our son?!”

Han rocked on his heels. “Uh huh.”

Leia thrust her hands to her head in frustration. “What in the hell is going on?!”

“Guys!” Finn paraded before the gathering soldiers. “Just stop! He’s on our side now!”

One woman cried, “That man is a war criminal and needs to be placed under arrest immediately!”

A man yelled out, “Rey, stand down! If you’re protecting a criminal, that makes you just as guilty!”

Rey smirked. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

Another one: “Rey, you have always fought by our side, don’t do this now! Put your guns down and let us do our jobs!”

Rey shook her head. “Oh I don’t put my guns down until I’m done shooting.”

Finn waved his hands. “NO ONE’S SHOOTING!”

Ben could feel Kylo’s tension and knew he was ready to go on a rampage. “Kylo,” he whispered, “just stay down and stay by me, okay? Promise?” Kylo said nothing but didn’t move either.

“Rey!” the first woman shouted. “Don’t make us attack. Turn him over right now—”

Ben stood, hands raised just to his chest level. “We’re not turning him over! He stays with us, end of story!” He saw Kylo’s incredulous eyes look up at him.

“Who the hell are you?”

Leia turned, hands on her hips. “He’s my son Ben, you idiot!”

Ben nodded once. “And so is Kylo!”

Gasps and all eyes turned to Leia. She threw her hands up. “Oh lay off, I just found out a few minutes ago!”

Ben could barely catch his breath, but he knew he had to stand for his brother. “I know what you’re all thinking. Hell, I fought him myself on his Star Destroyer, you know, before I totally decimated it.”

Finn stuck his finger up. “ _That_ is a story you all need to hear when we’re done. Porn everywhere.”

Poe lowered his gun. “Well now you have my interest.”

Rey snorted. “That’s why you’ve always been my favorite chronic masturbator.” A few snorts and giggles followed that statement.

Ben sighed and addressed the crowd again. “I know what he’s done, but he was forced to do it. You don’t know what he’s been through. He was raised by Palpatine’s weird cult and tortured and conditioned to fight against you. He’s endured a lot, and he wants out. He wants to help us defeat him. And we need him. We can’t fight Palpatine without him. So no, you can’t take him. I…I won’t allow it.”

He caught his mother’s gaze. It held shock but such deep pride, as if she’d never imagined he could ever have the strength to speak out like this.

And honestly, before this trip, he wouldn’t have.

The girl with the braids said, “And why the hell should we listen to you?”

He felt Rey gear up in tension and was afraid she’d blow the girl right off the planet in a hail of plasma fire. Rey…she had been an excellent teacher, even if she didn’t realize it.

Ben stretched out on the Force with an ease he’d never felt in his life and thrust his hands up. The soldiers’ weapons all flung into the air, held high above their heads. He looked each one of them in the eyes. “Because I’m the guy who can do this!”

Fear, awe, shock—they weren’t expressions he ever wanted to bring out in others, but he had to protect his little brother.

He softened and smiled. “But I don’t want us to be enemies. He’s my brother and I love him. And we need him. Rey and I are your only hope of defeating Palpatine for good, and we need Kylo’s help because he has knowledge of the temple none of us have. Please, can we come to a peaceful resolution? We’re all on the same side.”

He lowered his hands, returning the weapons to their owners, hoping beyond all hope no one would fire.

It was Leia’s turn to address the crowd. “I think it’s time you all put those away and start listening to my sons.”

Ben whipped his head around to her at that final word and saw the warmth in her eyes he always loved. Rey always said his heart was huge, but he learned from the best.

Poe waved the soldiers away. “Alright come on, back off. Let’s…we’ll hear them out, come on.”

Rey finally lowered her guns, and Ben took his mother’s hands. She sighed and tilted her head. “It seems we have a _lot_ to talk about.”

Ben nodded. “We really do.”

From behind him, Kylo said, “I wish to speak.” The group fell quiet, and Ben moved aside to give him room. Kylo shifted, his hair still shrouding his face, hunched over slightly. He looked terribly unnerved by the events and people surrounding him, but determination was cemented on his face. “I can tell you everything you need to know about the Final Order. Whatever you need…to fight them. To win. I…can’t change anything I’ve done, but I can help you in ways no one else can.”

Finn nodded to Poe, who exchanged looks with Rey. Poe finally nodded and waved Kylo over.

Rey holstered her guns. “Come on, Kylo. Ben, don’t worry, I’ll take care of him. I know you have a lot of catching up to do with your mother.”

Ben smiled softly and laid his hand on her shoulder. “Thank you.” He pulled her in for a kiss and heard clapping.

Poe grinned. “It’s a miracle! Someone finally tamed the beast!”

Rey put her hand on her gun, but it was Ben who drew the one she had given him. “Never call my girl a beast.”

Rey looked up at him, cheeks turning a luscious shade of pink, stars in her eyes. Her smile could have lit up five galaxies.

Poe stuck his hands up and shifted uncomfortably until Finn patted him on the back. “Relax. Ben can’t shoot for shit. He’d never hit you.”

Ben smirked and holstered the gun. “It’s true.” Rey, Kylo, Han, and Chewbacca nodded in agreement. Ben pointed his finger. “But you talk nice about my girl.”

Kylo skulked off with Rey to the two men, and Leia grabbed Ben’s hand. “Son? Shall we go sit in the lounge?”

Ben sighed. “Maybe cockpit, I need closing doors.”

Leia turned and shooed Han and Chewbacca from the Falcon. “I’ll close up the ramp behind us. I want to sit next to my boy and hear all about your adventures.”

#

In the lounge, Ben lay on his side with his knees drawn up, head resting on a pillow seated in his mother’s lap. Whenever he’d had a long story to tell or had come home brokenhearted from being bullied, he’d lay just like this, arms wrapped around himself while she stroked his hair.

He started at the beginning and walked her through everything. Granted, the naughty bits were treated as briefly and dryly as possible. It was one thing to discuss it with his father, but with Mommy? Not so much.

“And I just held him while he suffered until Rey came in with the med-tech. That’s pretty much it. I just worked on my plan until we landed, and well, the rest you know.”

“My, that is some story.” She sighed and stroked his head with a little more firmness than before. “Oh Ben, I knew something bad had happened. If she wasn’t there to save you…”

Ben took her hand. “I know…and if Kylo hadn’t been there to help… Mom, I’m so scared. I can’t lose her, she’s…she’s too precious to me.”

“Well, seems to me your strength and power is enough to keep her going. Never saw your powers so strong. Even when you were a child, you never wielded this much.”

Ben sighed, closing his eyes for a moment to enjoy his mother’s touch. “To be honest, I don’t care about it. It’s just a tool to get me where I need to go. I’d much rather be processing Tor-flex or helping Rey and Kylo than throwing my power around.”

“Well that’s good to hear you’re staying humble. You know I worry about you and that flood of power, and well, what comes with it.”

Ben smiled. “Well I got plenty of binary for Palpatine next time he tries to mess with me.” His breaths picked up as the realization dawned on him. This was it. From this point forward, their next stop was Exegol. Reality crept in like a frigid winter’s wind blowing in through the front door. Tears filled his eyes. “Mom…I’m scared…I’m so scared…I don’t want to fight Palpatine. I don’t want any of it. I just want to go home with Rey and Kylo and go back to work. I’m not…I was never made for this!” He squeezed his eyes shut, tears falling to the pillow. “I just wish it would go away.”

“Oh my sweet boy, I know you’re scared. And what did I tell you the last time, huh? When you were scared before presenting at that symposium?”

Ben swallowed. “Stay afraid but do it anyway.”

“What’s important is the action.”

“You don’t have to wait to be confident.”

“Just do it and the confidence will follow. And what happened?”

Ben took a lengthy breath. “I was terrified, but I did it anyway. And it was fast, and then it was over.” He shook his head. “But that wasn’t life or death for everyone I love and the whole galaxy. I can’t screw this up. If I do, we all die. That’s a lot of pressure.”

Leia shifted. “Ben, sit up, I want to look at you.” He obliged but held the pillow to his chest. His mother’s eyes were as strong and warm as ever, like nothing bad could ever happen as long as he was looking into them. “The Ben I left in Chandrila only a short time ago is not the same one I’m looking at now.”

Ben flinched. “What do you mean?”

“I left a shy, nervous, withdrawn person who could do such great things with his intellect but collapsed under the weight of anything else. Now I look at you and see a remarkable change. It’s like you’ve grown up, grown into the man you were always meant to be. I see confidence in you, strength, capability, and so much courage it astounds me. Ben, you were holding a dangerous warlord in your arms this morning, comforting him and making him feel like he mattered. You yanked the soldiers’ guns away and commanded their attention. Kylo Ren, who I’ve been fighting against since I left, is now outside spilling all the secrets we need because of _you_. Do you realize this, Ben? You’ve turned the tide of the war with your heart!” She put her hand to his cheek. “Imagine what you can do with the rest of all you have to offer.”

“Mom,” he squeaked out, tears rolling down his cheeks.

She took his hands, eyes turning serious. “Ben, you need to understand something. You are so precious to me. Until now you have been my only child, my special boy, and if anything happened to you, I would never recover. My heart would break apart and never be repaired. And knowing this, I’m sending you right into the heart of the battle against the most dangerous man to ever walk this galaxy. If I had any doubt that you could do this and win, I wouldn’t send you in there. I’d find some other way, hell, I’d do it myself. But the galaxy doesn’t need me. It needs _you_. And I know you can do it.”

Ben pulled his mother’s hands to his mouth and kissed her fingers. “The galaxy may not need you, but I sure do.”

She smiled in that special way of hers and stretched out her arms. He nestled into her embrace and wept into her chest, just to let it all out, get the fears and self-doubt out of his system once and for all. He didn’t have time for it. The final battle drew near, and if he was as powerful and capable as she said he was, then he needed to prove it by doing what he did best.

He sniffled as he sat up and tried to smile. Leia wiped his face and pushed his hair back. “You and Rey are going to walk in there, kick ass, and come home to us, you hear me? I won’t entertain any other notion.” Her smile assured him, and he hoped she was right. She chuckled and shook her head. “Honestly, I didn’t really get to know her all that well before I had to rush off, but after seeing how she comforted you, I knew she was the one.” She brushed the errant locks out of his face. “Only someone who truly understood your many and beautiful facets could understand you enough to do that for you.”

Ben laughed and sniffled. “I do love her. We were made for each other.”

Leia nodded. “You sure were.” She sighed and clasped her hands. “Well, there’s a lot more work to do, now that we know what we know. I need to check in with the rest of the Resistance to see what they’ve learned from Kylo, and I know you have a lot of prep to do on your own. You going to be okay? You want a cup of milk?”

Ben nodded. “Yes, please.” Cringing at himself, he put his hand to his head. “What am I doing—you just praised me for growing up and I’m acting like a kid again.”

“Nonsense,” she said, standing. “It’s a cup of milk, not a baby bottle. Besides, I like doing these things for you. It’s a little thing to me but a big thing to you.”

Ben nodded and smiled. “You always understood me.”

She left to the galley and returned with a SOLO cup full of blue milk. “And now you have someone else who does, too.”

Ben nodded, thinking about Rey, feeling her essence across their bond. He took a drink, transported to his younger days when Mom always finished soothing him by offering a cup of milk. That one small thing became synonymous with comfort.

“Well,” Leia said as she straightened her gray dress, “better go check on Kylo, make sure they’re not roasting him for dinner.” She paused. “My son…him…” She shook her head. “This is going to take some getting used to. Don’t expect perfection out of me on this, Ben. I may not have seen his face until now, but I’ve had more than a few words with him since joining the Resistance and none of them were good.”

“I know. He still scares the hell out of me sometimes. If not for Rey keeping him in line, I don’t know…”

“Well, knowing you, you would have kept on trying, regardless. Probably would have had your underpants pulled over your head by now, but you still would have given him the benefit of the doubt.” She nodded. “I’m glad you found someone like Rey. Someone has to keep you out of trouble.”

#

Ben sat inside the cockpit of the TIE Silencer and connected his testing unit to the control panel. While the system ran its analysis, he grasped the controls. “Pew pew! Watch me dive in and out of this asteroid field.” He jerked the control to the left and made whooshing sounds.

“The hell are you doing?”

Ben sprung out of the seat and hit his head on the release bar. As he rubbed the sore spot, he saw Kylo standing outside the ship. “Do you have to sneak up on me like that?”

“I called your name three times.”

Ben rewound his mental video and remembered hearing fans cheering his name. He sighed and sat down once again. “I was…in my own head.”

Kylo rubbed some dust off the exterior of the ship. “You usually are.”

Ben examined the readout from his tester, then looked up again. “Huh?”

Kylo shook his head and pulled against the ship to stretch out his arms. “Once this is over, I’ll show you how to fly this. It’s a little different from your father’s ship.”

“Oh I can’t fly a ship. My dad kept trying to teach me, and then when I wrecked the Falcon, that was it.” Ben chuckled. “He said, ‘Damnit boy! For a kid who came from me and Anakin Skywalker, you really can’t fly for shit.’” Ben scratched his chin. “I’m not sure piloting skills are hereditary though. I have to check my genetics research.”

Kylo shrugged. “It’s not hard, just a combination of knowledge, instinct, and awareness.”

“I’m sure lightsaber combat isn’t hard to you either.”

“Just practice. That math with letters, now that’s hard.”

Ben smiled at him. “Also practice!”

Kylo gave one of his rare soft chuckles. His attention drifted to the horizon.

Ben looked around. “I’m surprised they’re letting you wander without a military escort.”

Kylo shrugged again. “Apparently what I gave them was enough to earn me, what did they say? Probation. I never heard of it. Where I come from, if you fuck up, you die or suffer. The end. They said if I don’t cause any more problems there will be no charges. Rey helped, explained who I am and what I came from.”

“Hey, that’s great! Eh, even if they were still giving you a hassle, my mom would set them straight. You don’t mess with my mom, and they know that.”

Kylo nodded absently, not sure if he fully understood. “You stood up for me.”

“Of course, you’re my brother.”

“You weren’t afraid. You were strong and compelling. I’ve never really seen you like that.”

Ben tapped his projections to program another test. “I don’t know. I was more afraid than I let on.”

“But you stood anyway. For me.” He shook his head. “No one’s ever stood for me before.”

Ben smiled and patted his leg. “You’re my brother. And you need someone to stand for you for a change. Besides, you did the same for me. You took the blame to get me out of trouble with my mother. You didn’t have to do that, but thank you.”

Kylo shrugged. “I don’t care what happens to me, but I do care what happens to you.”

Ben tipped his head back. “Aw, Kylo…”

His brother stiffened as if uncomfortable with this whole feelings thing. “You told them you loved me. You don’t know me enough to love me. Why would you say that?”

“Because I meant it.”

Kylo shook his head, incredulous. “I don’t get it.”

Ben stared off at the same horizon his brother was fixated on. “I love Rey too, with every piece of my soul, and I’ve barely known her for any real length of time either.” He shrugged. “It’s who I am. I care and I love. I also get my ass handed to me because of it sometimes, but it’s just me.”

Kylo scraped his boots on the ground. “Can I learn that?” He growled and shook his body like a wet animal. “Stupid questions in my head.”

Ben stood. “Kylo, it’s not a stupid question. You have trouble understanding your feelings and knowing what healthy and unhealthy behavior is. It will take work, but I’ve seen your heart. You have the capacity.”

Kylo paced in circles. “I like the world you’ve shown me. But I don’t understand it. I want to.”

Ben smiled. “You will one day, Kylo. I’ll help you. We all will. Once this…Palpatine mess is over, we’re all going to start living for once.”

Kylo nodded but seemed to become more agitated, bouncing in place, pivoting. Ben had no idea what was wrong with him, and then his brother finally spoke again. “Can I do the Galacticon with you?”

Ben gasped. “What?”

“I can fly the Silencer for us. Maybe go as grandfather and grandson.” His gaze caught Ben’s for just a moment before flitting away.

Ben climbed out of the Silencer, mouth open. “Kylo…of course.” His smile took over his entire face. “That’s the greatest idea ever! See? Now aren’t you happy I saved your uniform?”

Kylo shook his head like a soggy pup again. “Noooo, I don’t want to go as me. I want to go as you. Wear the belts with all the things.”

Ben couldn’t believe what he just heard. “You want to go as _me?_ But your uniform is so much cooler!”

“But you’re the hero of this story. And what you did? With all those things? I know…oh I was so PISSED at you when it happened, but you…kicked my ass with no fighting skills and barely any power, jumped to save your father, escaped, then everything—all you did after—all of this, I…I want to go as Ben Solo. Besides, you need my red lightsaber, so I’ll use your blue one.”

Ben just stood there, breathing, trying to process what he just heard because it seemed so unreal. He never in his lifetime expected that anyone would ever consider him worthy enough to cosplay. And it was Kylo? Of all people? Kylo Fucking Ren, the guy that terrified everyone in this camp, wanted to cosplay as _him_?

“Kylo…holy shit…”

His brother shrugged. “So can I?”

The only way Ben could answer was by pulling his brother into a hug. Stiffness and confusion melted into Kylo’s best attempt at softening.

Kylo pulled back and quirked his head. “I don’t know if this means yes or no.”

Ben put his hand behind his brother’s neck. “Absolutely yes. I would be more than honored.” He gave his brother a pat on the shoulder and returned to the Silencer, spinning at the last moment to point his multidriver. “We are winning that cosplay contest! There’s no way in hell we’re losing that sucker!”

“Okay. I don’t…know what that is, but I do like winning.”

Han came charging over. “Alright numbnuts, we are disconnecting the TIE and leaving it here.”

Ben shrieked in offense. “We are _not_ leaving my TIE behind—and don’t call me numbnuts!”

Han pointed his finger. “First of all, I _will_ call you numbnuts after your mother kicked my ass because of you.”

Ben equally pointed his finger. “That paternity test was on you!”

“Well you didn’t have to make her think I cheated on her!”

Ben opened his mouth to speak, closed it, and opened it again. “I’m not leaving the TIE!”

“Ben, we have to. Next stop is Exegol. After we drop you off, the Falcon’s going into battle with the rest of the fighters. Those Final Order ships aren’t going to be stopped by killing Palpatine alone.”

“But you can’t leave it! I want it—I mean I need it. For science.” Ben blinked.

“No!” Han started disconnecting the attachments.

Ben flailed after him. “Dad, I’m serious! I have to study this to get an idea of the tech I’m working with over there—it’s literally life and death!”

“Then study it now while you’re here because when we take off, it stays. I can’t go into battle with that thing stuck to us.”

Ben clenched his fists. “These jerks are gonna take it!”

Han paused with his hand resting on the hull of the Silencer. “You’re telling me in all your gadgets and crap, you don’t have a security system?”

Ben blinked again and slowly backed away, head held high despite not realizing he could easily do just that. He had plenty of security tech. With a grunt, he dove back into the console and started removing fasteners. He needed to know how Palpatine’s crew designed their systems. This coupled with the broken Wayfinder wouldn’t give him all the answers, but it would be enough of a start.

Kylo took to the task of assisting Han. “What kind of engine is the Falcon running?”

Han flashed him a look of little interest. “Modified Gyrodine sublight engine, 0.5 Isu-Sim hyperdrive.”

Kylo nodded. “Nice. What’s the Megalight rating?”

“Seventy-five.”

“Impressive for a freighter. How’s it handle?”

Han tossed aside a handful of cables. “Gotten me out of more than a few skirmishes. Made the Kessel Run in twelve parsecs.”

Kylo raised his brow. “That _is_ impressive. The Silencer has a twin ion engine with a Megalight rating of 155.”

Han made a vaguely impressed huff. “Not bad. I remember you handled that sucker pretty good out there.”

Kylo nodded. “It takes sharp reflexes. Most can’t handle the Silencer at its best, really use it to its full potential.”

Ben cocked an eyebrow, intrigued, not by their discussion, but how Kylo spoke. Whenever he was _not_ talking about his feelings or matters of relationships, his speech was smoother, more in control.

Kylo continued. “I once cut in through a tight space to destroy the hangar of an enemy ship and pulled out before the explosion knocked me offline. Officers said it was the most impressive handling of a starfighter they had ever seen.” He glanced at Han and hung his head. “I probably shouldn’t talk about that. Especially not here.”

Han eyed him for a few moments and huffed. “At least someone got my flying genes. Hell’s your excuse?”

Ben looked up. “My excuse—Dad! You know I get nervous when things move too fast!”

Han pointed his multidriver between the two men. “Kylo’s your clone, yet the two of you are complete opposites. How’s that happen, genius?”

Ben stroked his chin. How did that happen? Was nurture more important than nature? Did a clone necessarily mean exact same intellect or interests?

Clone…

Ben gasped hard enough to suck in a planet and ran into the Falcon.

#

Ben hadn’t been sure about his plan to defeat Palpatine until that sudden moment everything became clear. With the added changes, all he needed now was his mommy.

On the Falcon, Ben walked Leia through the diagrams on his projections. She stood watching with rapt attention, finger under her chin, analyzing every portion. Sometimes she nodded. Sometimes her cheek quirked or eye twitched. Other times she smiled and shook her head.

“So?” he asked. “What do you think? What would you add or improve?”

Leia shook her head, chuckling. “This is…this is something else.”

Ben’s face dropped. “Is that good or bad?”

“Very good. I’m amazed at what you came up with here. I guess you got a little of our war strategy genes after all, huh?”

Ben smiled and shrugged. “It’s more scientific to me than anything.”

“You know, over here, have you considered…”

Ben spent another hour with her going over the plan, making changes, and adjusting for them. When finished, she nodded. “That is a hell of a gameplan. Did your father see this?”

“No, not yet.”

Leia stepped to the end of the ramp. “Han! Get your ass in here. Come look at what your son did.”

Han took one look at Ben’s plans and rolled his eyes. “Ben, you can’t defeat Palpatine with math!”

Leia put her hands on her hips. “Seems to me he can. Now stop looking at what went into it and look at the end result.”

Han rubbed his chin. “Huh…hm…” He chuckled. “That’s a good one…yeah, okay.” He laughed hard at one part. “Oh that’s like the Star Destroyer all over again.” He put his fingers over his mouth, concentrating. “Over here, it looks good but it could go either way, what if you…”

After another hour, with the approval of two generals who took down an empire with a handful of rebels, Ben nodded at his masterpiece. “This is it. This is the plan.”

Leia linked arms with him. “It’s insane, but because of that it just might work.”

Ben let out a long breath and the tension with it. “Okay, now that that’s settled, it’s time to prepare. I have a lot of work to do in here, so just keep me informed of what’s going on and please, keep an eye on Kylo? He’s bonkers, but he has a good heart.”

Leia patted his hand. “I promise we’ll take care of him.”

Han huffed. “All they have to do is get him drunk and they’ll send him right back to us in a heartbeat.”

#

“You made it!”

Rey watched Finn’s eyes light up as he ran toward Jannah. After a long embrace, they joined Rey and Poe at the mess tent. Rey took a bite of a _tensa_ fruit. “So, decided to join us after all?” She offered another of the snack.

Jannah grasped it and smiled. “It didn’t take much convincing. We’re warriors, ground warriors, but we’re ready to fight nonetheless.”

Poe sat on a chair backwards. “That’s great, actually. Thanks to Kylo, we learned there’s a sequence of towers that control the Star Destroyer fleet. A lot of our onboard weapons won’t be able to penetrate the shields of the Destroyers, but Kylo said there’s an entire system of controls beneath the surface of Exegol. If we get in there, we can disable the master controls which will allow our starfighter fleet to attack.”

Finn nodded. “I agreed to head the ground units. It would be an honor if your people would join us.”

Jannah smiled, her eyes tracing Finn. “The honor would be ours.”

Rey snorted at the dopey eyes they kept giving each other.

Poe groaned. “Just stick your tongues down each other’s throats and get it over with already.”

Finn narrowed his eyes. “Silence. Try it sometime.”

Poe splayed his hands. “Not my expertise, friend.”

Rey poked through the storage boxes while those two squabbled. “If you really want to decimate the master control system, you need to get Ben on board.”

Finn snickered. “Believe me, I thought about it, but he’s going to already have his hands full alongside you with Palpatine.”

“True, but if you offer him the opportunity to hijack their system, he’ll find a way to do both.” She gasped and smiled when she found an enticing item. “And I know just how you can repay him for the extra work.”

#

“So what do you think?” Ben asked. His five projections were taken up with the official master plan.

Kylo rolled his jaw and narrowed his eyes in thought. “It’s good.”

Ben blinked. “It’s good? That’s it? Nothing to add? Anything that can go wrong?”

Kylo shrugged. “You seem to have factored in plenty of contingencies. Knowing the building, it’s viable. I’ll do it.”

Ben smiled. “Yes! Thank you! I just need Rey to look it all over, make sure she’s fine with it. In the meantime, I want to show you everything you’ll need to master before we go in…” He trailed off, frowning, his hands feeling abnormally heavy. Something cold and hard rested heavily in his palms. After looking down, he squealed.

Kylo frowned. “What the hell just happened?”

Ben held up his treasures. “Rey just sent me canned crab! One for each of us!”

Kylo sprung off his crate, suddenly very interested. “Canned crab—how did she send you canned crab?”

Ben stretched his arm out and closed his eyes. He felt along the Force through the corridors, to the galley, and into a drawer where he snagged two forks. It seemed so effortless now whereas it had been such a struggle before.

The utensils snapped into his waiting hand, and he handed one fork to Kylo along with the second can. “Our dyad is at full power. I finally broke through the suppression they had put on me. Apparently because she and I are one in the Force, we can transfer things to one another.”

Kylo popped open his can and nodded. “Handy. Now some of those contingency plans make sense. Didn’t really get it before, but I figured a real dyad could do things my shitty one couldn’t.”

“Not so shitty. It’s keeping you connected to us telepathically, and we may need that.” Kylo nodded and dug into his can, moaning in a way Ben had only done in the bedroom with Rey. Since his brother was in a rare moment of calm, it was a good time to bring up another topic. “So Kylo, I think maybe it would be a good idea for you and mom to talk, maybe apologize for anything you may have said while you were fighting against one another. What do you think?”

Kylo nodded. “It’s a good idea.” He swallowed but didn’t take another forkful. “I was not kind to her. I only knew her as my enemy.”

“I know. And she knows that too. She’ll be open to an apology, she’s a lot more forgiving than my dad.”

Kylo looked up. “Has he forgiven me?”

Ben shrugged. “I honestly don’t know. He’s warming up to you, though. He at least tried to comfort you when you were drunk.”

Kylo stiffened. “Oh. I don’t remember.”

“Right…well, you’ll know by his actions. If he extends a kindness to you he doesn’t extend to others, you can consider yourself forgiven. He’d never come out and say it.”

Kylo poked at the crab. “Your mother referred to me as one of her sons when she spoke. After the things I said and did, why?”

“Because that’s who she is. She’s a very special person.”

Kylo remained quiet, poking. “The way she treated you, touched you. I didn’t know people could be so kind to one another.” He looked up. “Would she be that kind to me?”

Ben smiled. “One day I’m sure. I don’t know what you said or did, but I do know her and how big her heart is. Just show her yours.”

Kylo grunted, hiding beneath his hair. “I’m not sure I have one.”

Ben grasped his arm, making his brother look up. “You do. I saw it and I felt it. You may not understand it, but it’s there, and I know she’ll see it too and help you discover it.”

“Just like you.” One of those rare smiles warmed Kylo’s face. He dug into his can once more. “I like crab.”

#

Rey nodded as she reviewed Ben’s master plan. “This is absolute insanity. I love it.”

Ben tugged at his chin hairs, then started writing on the projection. “Right here. I can hack the main controls at this point and still make it in on time for the rest. I may be up against an actual proprietary system, but based on the last Destroyer, I doubt it. Hmmm…now to think of something that would drive the workers insane enough to render them incapable of fighting back…Hey Finn, does the Resistance have a store of earplugs?”

Finn shrugged. “Uh, probably, I can check.”

Ben grinned. “You’re gonna need them.”

Han walked up the ramp of the Falcon. “Alright kids, we’re taking off soon. Anything you need on land, get it now. Anyone who doesn’t belong on here, get off.”

Finn jogged up to him. “Han, would it be alright if Jannah joined us for the trip? We um…we need to discuss some battle plans.”

“Where, in your pants?”

Rey snorted into laughter. At least Ben wasn’t the butt of all of Han’s rough treatment.

Finn sucked in his lips and nodded. “Okay, maybe it’s a bit more personal than that. I mean, we’re going up against the Final Order tomorrow. I’m sure you can understand a…man’s wish to spend the last night he may be alive with a woman he cares about?”

Han rubbed the back of his head. “Ehhh, we’re short on room as it is.”

“We’ll make do,” Leia said behind him. “The more the merrier, though someone may be sleeping on the couch tonight.” Chewbacca roared. “No, not you Chewy. I’d never do that to you.”

Rey strolled down the ramp to the waiting pilot at its end. Poe held his arms out, cocked his head once, and she finally relented and gave him a hug. When she let him go, she punched him in the arm. “Knock’em dead tomorrow.”

“Fry me up a slice of Palpatine and serve it burnt.”

“I will.” She grasped his arm. “Take care out there.”

Poe nodded, restraining his emotions. “You too.” He cleared his throat. “Hey, does Ben really think this dumbass shield will keep me off that TIE?”

A bubble of blue light glowed around the starfighter along with illuminated messages: Deadly Dangerous Force Field! Keep Off! MINE! Property of Ben Solo! Touch and Die! Rey shook her head. “I wouldn’t try if I were you.”

Poe shimmied his hips. “But you’re nooooot.”

Rey nodded. “Hand me that stick.”

“You gonna hit me with it?”

“Nope. Promise.”

Poe grasped the sizable hunk of branch and held it aloft. She grasped it, nodded a thanks, and flung it at the Silencer. The branch burnt to ash in a split second. Poe’s jaw dropped open.

Rey grinned. “He wasn’t kidding!

Rey returned to the lounge, trying to ignore the subtle sense of doom hanging under her gut. Time was drawing near. If it had just been her, she wouldn’t have wasted a nerve. But as she regarded the group gathered, discussing any last minute necessities before they took off, she realized something profound.

This was her family.

Grumpy old Han, massive yet surprisingly gentle Chewbacca, loyal peacemaker Finn, she didn’t know Leia all that well yet but Rey already knew her as Mom, broken but trying Kylo—

—and Ben. The love of her life. Her shining Light in the Darkness. The reason her heart smiled.

Tomorrow, they’d all face death.

With only Ben’s crazy plan to help turn the tide in their favor.

Ben nudged Kylo, who sat pressed up next to him as if trying to hide from something. Kylo whipped his head back and barked at the ceiling before shoving himself to his feet.

Ben’s scarred replica stood before Leia, gripped his hair with one hand and spun back and forth at the torso, then let his hair go along with an exhale. “General Organa, I am sorry for things I said and did while I was Supreme Leader.” He looked at Ben, who nodded and gave him a thumbs up.

Leia crossed her arms, looking a mix of motherly toughness and commanding officer. “Oh? Well, you did do a lot of things. I’d like to hear you admit to them before we move forward.”

Kylo rubbed his palm against his forehead, frowning, thinking. “I’m sorry for saying the second I saw your face next I’d blast it into oblivion.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “Wait, what?”

“And I’m sorry for saying I’d murder you in your sleep along with your family.”

Ben gasped and choked on it.

“I’m sorry I said Darth Vader should have left you on Alderaan before he blew it up.”

Ben sprung to his feet. “You what?!”

“And I’m sorry I said the only good Resistance general was a dead one, and I would decimate everything you hold dear and hold the severed heads of everyone you cared about in your face before I kill you with my bare hands—”

“You said that to my mom?! What the—how the—WHAT THE HELL, KYLO?!”

“We were at war!”

“I know, but that’s my mom! How could you say such terrible things to my mom—no one gets to say things like that to my mom!”

Kylo pressed his fist against his head and growled, unable to process his emotions or thoughts on the matter.

Ben ran over to his mother and grasped her shoulders. “Mom, I had no idea he said all that to you! I’m so sorry!”

Leia gave him that warm smile she reserved especially for him and patted him on the arm. “It’s okay, Ben. Your mom is a tough cookie who’s taken a hell of a lot worse. Let Kylo have a chance to say what he needs to say to me.” Ben pressed his lips into a crooked frown and stayed behind her, so incredibly protective of her for someone that ran from worms. Leia nodded to the disjointed clone. “Go on, Kylo. Anything else?”

Kylo rubbed the side of his nose and shoved his hair back. “I’m sorry I tried to kill your husband and son. And I’m sorry I shot up the ship you were on and nearly killed you, even though I probably did kill a bunch of—”

Ben threw his hands in the air. “Kylo, really?!”

Rey stepped over and stood beside Kylo who was scraping his boots on the floor, his ability to handle what he had done and Ben’s clear disapproval turning into a ragged display of physicality.

Rey stared at Ben with a sharpness she rarely showed him. “Ben, it’s war. And war is ugly, and there’s lots of death involved. You agreed to love me, and him, despite knowing the blood on our hands. Has anything changed about that?”

Ben exhaled and put his fingers to his head. “No, of course not. I still love him, of course.” He flailed his arms. “But this is my _mom_!”

Han put his hands on his hips. “Why didn’t you care this much when he shoved me off a bridge?”

Ben’s whiny desperation shifted back to the growling shouts he always threw at his father. “Damnit, Dad! We’re talking about Mom right now!” Han tossed his hands up in response.

Kylo roared into his arm, then finished it toward the ceiling. “PLEASE LET ME FIX IT!”

Rey didn’t need the residual telepathy with Kylo to understand where his mind was at. She could read it in those expressive eyes that spoke more truth than words, a trait he shared with Ben.

Rey sent to her dyad, _Ben, I don’t think he can handle your disapproval, just like you couldn’t handle it from your mother. Only he doesn’t know how to articulate it._

His eyes widened in realization, and she wondered what he’d do next as he worked to process his own feelings on it all—fist to his mouth, hand through his hair, vigorous finger rub on his scalp.

And beside her Kylo—fist to his head, harsh hand through his hair, pulling at the ends and probably hurting himself.

She almost burst out laughing at how alike they were.

Then Ben, always her Ben, pushed through whatever obstacle had held him and stepped forward. He put his arm around Kylo and whispered, “It’s okay.” He pulled his brother into his arms. Kylo remained boxy and stiff, eyes wild as he flooded with feelings he didn’t understand. “I know you left that life behind,” Ben murmured, and Kylo softened. “That was hard for me to hear, but I don’t love you any less because I know you’re trying so hard to be better.”

Kylo hung his head and bumped it against Ben’s chest before finally sliding his arms around his brother in return.

Leia stood there with tears in her eyes, hands to her mouth, such incredible pride in her gaze. “Oh Ben.”

With a pat on the back, Ben let Kylo go, smiled, and touched foreheads with his brother. Leia took his hands and looked up at him in adoration. “You were magnificent with him.”

Ben gave a shy little shrug. “I learned from the best.”

If this mushy stuff kept up, Rey was going to puke. Honestly she’d rather do that than allow the tear that almost crept into her eye, something she didn’t need everyone seeing. Embracing the bowl was a safer option.

Leia took in a breath and straightened. “I appreciate and accept your apology, Kylo. I know we were at war, and neither of us knew we were fighting against family. I’m very proud of you for having the strength and honor to apologize.”

Kylo looked up, confused. “You’re proud of me?”

“I am. It’s…going to take a little time for me to adjust to this, but this was a fine first step. And in all fairness, I suppose I should apologize for my own speech during our little discussions. Although I feel I kept my cool during most of our heated exchanges, I suppose it was unprofessional of me to call you a sad Gungan’s version of Darth Vader.”

Finn, Jannah, and Rey burst out laughing, Ben dropped his jaw, and Han slow-clapped.

Rey slapped Kylo on the back. “She got you good.”

Kylo shoved his hands in his pockets. But moments later, his shoulders shook. A smile crept on his face beneath his long hair. He was laughing. Kylo was actually laughing!

Ben held his hand up for a high-five from his mother. “That was good. I’m impressed.” He smiled. “Never mess with Mom.”

Leia patted his arm. “No, you most certainly do not. Come on, let’s all start off on a new foot together. Come tomorrow, we will need to rely on each other no matter what happened in the past. Let’s embrace what we have now together and let it make for a stronger tomorrow.” She turned and waved to her husband. “Han, whenever you’re ready, take us up. We’re leading the way to Exegol.”

Han nodded. “Kylo!”

The young man looked up from beneath his mop of hair.

“We need your Wayfinder. Come to the cockpit.”

#

Ben couldn’t resist the opportunity to see the Wayfinder in action. In the cockpit, Kylo settled it into the component cradle and attached the sensors. Han brought up the mapping system, and Exegol’s location flashed in red.

“You can set targeting now,” Kylo said. “As long as the Wayfinder is connected, the mapping system will retain its coordinates.”

“Perfect,” Han said. He was just about to sit in the pilot’s chair when he turned. “Chewy, can I talk to you a minute?”

While the two were gone, Kylo studied the control panel of the Falcon while Ben eyed the Wayfinder, mesmerized over its functioning. After some growling and gurgling, Han returned alone and sat in the copilot’s seat. “Kylo, why don’t you go ahead and take us up.”

If Ben had anything in his hands, he would have dropped it in that moment. This was unheard of. “Dad?”

Han shrugged. “He’s a pilot. He can do it.”

Kylo just stared, incredulous.

Ben opened and closed his mouth. “But Dad—”

“Can you pilot a ship?”

Ben didn’t dignify that with an answer.

“Well Kylo can. Come on, kid. Take us up.”

Kylo blinked and swallowed. “Really?”

“Won’t handle like a TIE, but I’m sure you’ll get the feel for it.”

Kylo let out a sharp breath with a smile. Watching Han with surprise and admiration, Kylo crept into the pilot’s seat and went to work. His hands worked the controls as if he’d known them all his life, and the checks he asked of Han were on point. Kylo really knew what he was doing.

Ben sat in the seat behind him and buckled up. The Millennium Falcon lifted off the ground and flew up into the atmosphere with absolute precision. Ben watched his father’s face the entire time, and when Kylo punched them into hyperspace, Ben knew Han had forgiven his new son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost, credit (sniffle) to Carrie Fisher for her quote that Leia and Ben recite. This was both perfect for the scene and a shoutout to Space Mom. The portion in question (and isn't her complete quote) is: "Stay afraid but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and the confidence will follow."
> 
> I really wanted a different Leia in this story than the one in the Sequel Trilogy, no less tough and capable, but actually having a loving relationship with her son (and now working to accept his polar opposite.) In some ways, this fic is a wishlist of things I would liked to have seen, and honestly it's starting to become my headcanon. When I get upset about TROS, I keep telling myself that THIS is Ben's real story LOL!
> 
> The Ben/Kylo mush was heavy in this chapter! Their relationship really started taking on a life of its own I hadn't expected, and this chapter, long as it is, was split in half when the original got too huge. I don't know, I just love writing their interactions and exploring Kylo's mess of a head with a heart he doesn't yet know how to use. 
> 
> Next up, we have the rest of the day/night on the ship before they reach Exegol. There will be dancing, wrestling, and dice involved. And one more spot of steam for the night before the big battle!
> 
> PS I want to thank all you readers for sticking with this story! It's gotten WAY larger than I expected it to be! There's about 5-8 chapters left depending on how yappy my hands get.


	16. Twas the Night Before Exegol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, don't poke the Kylo!
> 
> The brothers get a little competitive, but Rey doesn't mind. Later, after Leia's feast, the crew of the Falcon tries to ease nerves before the big day. Ben and Rey go looking for love in all the wrong places.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All aboard the steam train once more! We're going to have fluff and fun in this chapter in prep for the big day in the next chapter!

The one thing Rey enjoyed immensely lately was observing Ben working at his best. It was one thing to watch him calculate and mutter, that incredible brain of his firing with precision and beauty like one of her guns. It was quite another seeing him take charge.

When he spoke up before the Resistance. When he pulled the gun on Poe. And now, as he commanded attention while going through his master plan, she could see the essence of the CEO that made SOLO-Corp a reality. The nervous creature she met on that first day was a dim memory compared to the mighty being before her now.

“So this is the secondary master system,” Ben said, pointing to the upgrades on Finn’s comm. “When it flashes green, that means it’s online and you have control of their systems. By that point, I should have softened them up a little, but this will give you access to all doors, anything you need. If you don’t see this flashing green, that means I couldn’t hack in for whatever reason and you’ll have to make do on your own.”

Finn nodded. “Got it.”

“Take some time today to go through the control options in case you have any questions. Once that’s online, I won’t be able to help you.” Ben crossed out markings on his projection. “Alright, that takes care of Finn and Jannah’s part. Dad, you know where to drop us off. Kylo, I already gave you the rundown of everything you need to know. Rey, you know your part, which is pretty much with me, hee hee—”

Rey chuckled and shook her head.

“—and I think we’re good on supplies. Finn, I’ll have a belt for you by morning. I’ve checked through my stock. We should have plenty for what we need, but I’ll process some extra just in case. I’ve got the makeup kit ready—”

Han turned to Rey. “Since when does a pirate travel with a makeup kit?”

Rey leaned aside with her fist on her hip. “Why do you assume it’s mine?”

Han dropped his head into his hands. “No. Please. Not his.”

“Dad!” Ben threw his hands up. “Galacticon is four days long! I wasn’t sure I wanted to spend that entire time in a helmet, so…”

“So what? You were planning to go as your grandmother instead?”

Ben pursed his lips and glared at him. “Dad, it’s a theatrical kit! When I got tired of going as warlord Grandpa, I was going to go as…burnt toast Grandpa.”

Rey bent over, laughing into her hands, which triggered a chain reaction of same. Even Kylo bore a toothy grin.

Leia shook her head. “Oh Ben, I don’t know about you sometimes, but you always bring a smile to my face.”

Ben sported a smile of pride before clapping his hands together. “Any questions about anything?” After some silence, he nodded. “Okay. Rey, Kylo, you and me should do a dry run, practice all the contingency plans. I’m going in somewhat blinded without fully knowing the tech beforehand, so we have to be prepared for anything.”

After a few hours of practice, the trio felt confident in their ability to execute the plan. Kylo pulled out the blue lightsaber, ignited it, and swung. “Now we train.”

Ben scratched his head. “Uhhhh, honestly, after all those practice runs, I’m just really not in the mood.”

Kylo stomped both feet. “The day before we take on Exegol and you’re not in the MOOD?!”

“Well I don’t want to get hurt right before the big day!”

Kylo turned to Rey and flung his hand out toward Ben. “Tell him!”

Rey sunk her chin into her hand. She did want to tell him. She also knew Ben probably _would_ get himself hurt. Decision made, she opened one of her chests and pulled out two training canes. “Hour of practice with these only. Keep it slow. Let Ben practice technique.”

Kylo howled in frustration, turned off the lightsaber, and hooked it hard enough to nearly take his own pants off. Ben breathed a sigh of relief and mouthed a thank you.

Despite his lunacy, Kylo showed incredible composure walking Ben through the maneuvers, perhaps inspired by Ben’s endless patience in return. Rey would have preferred to see him deal with real weaponry, but the dull quietness of the practice canes actually seemed to help Ben concentrate. No panic or overwhelm took over him.

When that hour was up, Ben smiled in satisfaction of a job well done, having learned something, and not gotten injured. Kylo, on the other hand, paced the cargo hold like he’d start biting the walls any second.

He roared through his teeth and swung the practice cane at nothing. “I need real training! GAHR! EVERY time before a major battle we would train until we collapse. That is the way! That is how it’s done!” He whipped the cane in a series of dangerous twirls and flipped over to land in a downward strike.

Ben leaned in toward Rey. “Maybe we should get him drunk again.”

Rey’s eyes widened, and she whipped her head back and forth. “Oh no. Not that again. He just needs to burn off some energy. He’s very physical, his body running at a thousand miles an hour while your mind does the same. You calm yourself by thinking and he does it by slaughtering stuff.”

Kylo screamed across the hold and slammed the cane into an old crate, splintering the practice weapon. He threw the remains against the wall and screamed at it like it had personally offended him.

Ben leaned in close again. “Is this how he exhibits nervousness? Is that what I’m seeing?”

Rey shrugged. “Maybe. I should go fight him. He’ll drive us nuts and destroy everything if he doesn’t burn off this energy.”

“Rey! I don’t want you getting hurt either!”

She snorted and laughed, but at his pursed lips and anxious frown, she softened. “I could always wear my new Tor-flex armor.”

Ben smacked his head. “Why didn’t I think of that? We could have been practicing with that the whole time.”

“We can always go back to—”

“No, please, I’m honestly bored with training. But…I do have an idea…”

#

Rey massaged her temples. She still didn’t get how this was better than training.

Finn slid into the cargo hold, beaming. “YES! Now this is what we need.”

Ben placed the last component for Holo-dancer and turned the system on. Kylo jolted at the sudden bright grid on the floor and projections before them.

“Finn!” Ben waved him over. “Okay Kylo, me and Finn are gonna show you how this works. First you select a character, then a background, and now a song.”

Kylo scratched his head. “Rey played songs for me before, but I don’t understand how this is supposed to be just like training.”

Ben turned while Finn set up his character. “What have you always praised me on? You said my footwork in a battle was great, and that I’m fast and agile even if I’m awful at everything else. Well, this is where I got it from! It will strengthen your skills on the battlefield, trust me.” He turned back around. “So the screen will tell you which block to stomp in, and if you do it right you get points. If you miss or don’t do it in time, you don’t get points.”

Kylo’s eye twitched. “I want points! What are points?”

“The more points you have, the better you are, and you beat your opponent by scoring more points than them.”

“Fat chance.” Finn stomped on the block that said he was ready to start. “Taking your ass down tonight.”

“You wish.”

Excitement flooded Kylo’s face, and Rey pressed her hand in her mouth to keep from laughing. Kylo balled his fists and shook them. “I want to take asses down!”

Ben pointed at him. “Then watch closely. Here we go.” The two men at the game leapt and jumped in tandem with the game and music, legs moving at a blinding speed.

“Not this fucking time!” Finn said.

“This time, every time!” Ben retorted, muscles in his back glistening with beauty.

Damn she loved that tank top. Rey sighed and smiled. The game never held interest for her, but it was so pretty to watch.

“This is bullshit!” Finn stormed off the grid.

“IN YOUR FACE!” Ben laughed with his tongue wagging.

Kylo tilted his head, eyes widening. “He’s competitive. Fascinating.”

Rey crossed her legs. “Yep. When it’s a task he does well in, he likes being at the top.”

Ben pointed to the empty grid. “Kylo? You want to try?”

“YES!” Kylo appeared on the grid as if he had cut through time and space to get there. “What do I do?”

“Just follow the screen. Step on the squares it tells you to step on and wave your hands where tells you to put those. Ready? We’ll start with a nice slow one.”

Rey watched this with a lock of her hair twiddling against her lips. This was the definition of precious. Kylo, clearly the more physical of the two, looked so incredibly awkward and clumsy for the first time ever. His head shifted up and down as he tried to watch the screen and figure where to put his foot.

“YOU SHUT UP!” Kylo screamed at the projection. “That was NOT TERRIBLE!”

“Just keep going,” Ben said, his hair collecting in damp locks. “Practice makes perfect—”

“You shut up! You never want to practice—why do you have more points than me? I WANT THE POINTS!”

“Then you _earn_ them! Come on, pay attention!”

Kylo screamed and launched himself through the projection, fists swinging.

Ben just kept going on as if his brother had done nothing. “That’s not how you’ll score points.”

“Scoring points is too hard like this!”

Ben huffed and smirked. “You trying to say I’m more physically competent than you?”

Judging by the inferno in Kylo’s eyes, Rey felt it best to keep her hand up, ready to throw Force around if needed. Ben was way too smug when he played this game, but honestly, it just made him even more sexy. He kept this up, she’d have her way with him one more time before the night was over.

Ben pointed to the spot next to him. “Now are you going to say I’m better than you or are you going to prove me wrong?”

Kylo stomped back over to the grid, growling with each breath. He glared at Ben like he might actually bite his brother’s shoulder off and feast upon it, but then snapped back to his own screen.

Ben flicked his eyebrows up and suppressed a grin. “Well then let’s go.”

Rey could almost taste the testosterone in the cargo hold. Jannah sat next to her, jaw dropped. She had tried out a few rounds for herself, but the real entertainment turned into watching the guys fight over it.

“WHO’S THE MAN NOW?!” Finn puffed his chest, arms out. “WHO’S THE DAMN MAN NOW?!”

“Fucking SHIT!” Ben spun away from the game and stomped his foot in frustration. Face full of irritation, he grasped his tank top and flung it off.

Jannah leaned in toward Rey. “This is sooooo hot.”

Rey giggled. “Maybe we’ll get lucky and they’ll start wrestling each other.”

Jannah clasped her hands together. “Oh pleeeease! Please let that happen!”

“MY TURN!” Kylo shoved Ben out of his way and hopped on the grid. Thankfully for him, after some prodding, he finally got the gist of the game and made his way up in points ranking. Thankfully for the women, he tossed his shirt long ago.

Now Finn and Kylo were going head to head, muscled legs a blur, sinuous backs and arms on display and in motion. Jannah leaned against Rey and said, “This is the best thing ever created.”

Rey snickered. “I wouldn’t have agreed to that until today, watching this insanity, but I’m so glad Ben came up with the idea.”

Finn stomped off the grid. “You fucking kidding me?!”

Kylo arched back, thrust his arms out, and screamed at the ceiling in victory.

Finn rubbed himself with a towel. “You just got lucky I was already worn from doing two songs in a row.”

“You fucking wish.”

Now Ben was at the grid, the two brothers ready to battle. “I will destroy you.”

Rey heaved in a breath and whispered to Jannah, “My nipples just got hard!”

And another song burst into the room, two replicas with legs of lightning, Kylo a little sharper and thinner, showing off more of his rocky physique, Ben a little softer but no less bulky and broad.

It was Kylo who roared and laughed in victory, setting Ben’s eyes ablaze. “This is BULLSHIT!” Ben barked. “You fucking cheated!”

Kylo pointed his finger. “I didn’t fucking cheat, you cheated!”

Ben poked his arm. “There’s no way you beat me fair and square!”

“Don’t call me a cheater!” Kylo shoved him, not terribly hard, but enough, just enough.

Ben thrust out his arms to shove him back. “You are a fucking cheater—” Kylo locked arms with him and both tumbled to the ground in a mess of pale skin, muscle, sweat, and long, beautiful black hair.

Jannah jumped to her feet. “It’s happening! It’s really happening!”

Rey put her hand to her chest. “Oh my stars…oh my stars.” She couldn’t deny the heat that crept between her legs. The perpetual pheromone dose didn’t help.

The two brothers rolled around, growling and shoving, Ben whining a lot less than Rey expected. If anything he was holding his own rather well.

Jannah pointed. “Finn! Get in there and stop them!”

Finn regarded her like she asked him to set himself on fire. “I’m not getting in the middle of that!”

Jannah licked her lips. “Can you try?”

Leia walked into the cargo hold. “What in the galaxy is all this yelling about?”

“Get off my hair!” Ben cried.

“No!” Kylo snapped. “You bit me!”

“Because you wouldn’t get off my hair!”

Rey tried waving Leia away. “It’s fine. It’s under control. Nothing to see here.”

Leia gave her a quick glance of disapproval and charged over to the two men. “Boys! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”

Two matching sets of eyes looked up at her. Then Ben looked at Kylo and said, “He shoved me.”

Kylo’s mouth sprung open. “You POKED me!” He pressed his hand against Ben’s face, and Ben retaliated by yanking on Kylo’s hair.

“Enough!” Leia shouted, both men cringing in response. “Both of you, get up, right now.” The men stood, hanging their heads. “Now what in the world could the two of you be fighting about?”

Jannah sighed and sat on the crate again. “It was fun while it lasted.”

Rey groaned and joined her. “Back in the day, we just let everyone fight out their battles. You didn’t interfere in a pirate squabble.”

Ben finally put his hand up. “It was me. I started it. I got competitive and acted like a jerk.”

Leia sighed and put her hands on her hips. “Well thank you for your honesty. Now I hope you two boys can get along from now on.” Murmured yeses fell from the men’s lips.

Jannah leaned in again. “What am I watching? Two grown men, who tomorrow will face off against Palpatine, getting scolded by their mommy?”

Rey chuckled. “Apparently you don’t mess with Mama Solo.”

Leia smoothed out her dress. “Now, why don’t we turn off this game and go cool off. Dinner will be ready soon—”

Ben’s eyes brightened. “Are you cooking?”

His mother smiled. “Yes, Ben, I’m cooking tonight.”

Ben jumped up and down and grabbed Kylo’s shoulders. “Mom’s cooking is the best, you’ll love…” Kylo had his head hung with a bitter pout. “Kylo, what?”

Kylo snarled. “You fought me and called me a cheater!”

Ben’s shoulders slunk. “I know, I’m so sorry, I’m just—”

“Fourteen again?” Jannah asked.

Ben smoothed his hair back. “Yeahhhh kinda started feeling that way.”

Kylo broke into a smile. “Wrestling was fun.” His face turned serious once more, and he cocked his head back. “But brothers shouldn’t fight, remember?”

“Oh so you _do_ remember something from that night.”

Kylo stared at him, wide-eyed. “No…”

Ben put his arm around Kylo. “You’re right, we shouldn’t fight. I’m sorry, Kylo. I’m still trying to get used to having a brother.”

“Yeah, me too.” They started heading out of the cargo hold together.

Leia sighed and shook her head. “And I need to get used to having two boys. Don’t need this shit at my age, that’s for sure.”

Ben looked back. “Wait, let me grab my—where’s my shirt?”

Rey held his tank top up to her face and inhaled. “What? You mean this shirt?”

“Yeah, can I have it?”

Rey blinked and smiled. “Nope.” She took another deep breath, sucking his essence down into her body. “It’s mine now.”

#

Ben and Kylo ate Leia’s cooking like orgasms were reserved only for food. Unlike Han’s careful rationing, Leia made enough for an army and the brothers took stark advantage. Ben’s special plate was stacked high and not a hint of one food touched the other. Kylo’s was a mess, and so was he when he tossed the fork and stuffed his face with his hands.

Ben almost thought to remind him of his manners, but Kylo was so thrilled, moaning and smiling, telling Leia what a delicious dinner it was, muffled because his mouth was full. It was one thing to experience Mom’s cooking every day, quite another to have it for the first time, especially after a lifetime of misery.

So he looked like a giant toddler. Mom’s cooking was one happiness that shouldn’t have interference.

Evening was now upon them, and the final battle drew closer with each hour. After the heavenly food coma from Leia’s feast, nerves rattled once more.

“We need to keep ourselves occupied,” Finn said. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but knowing we will be there soon, it’s really starting to get to me.”

Chewbacca had a suggestion. Ben snorted and said, “I don’t know why you enjoy losing at holo-chess so much—”

Chewbacca roared at charged at him until Leia gave him one stern look that stopped him in his tracks. “Chewy, leave Ben alone! How many times do I have to tell you?” She received a gurgled bark before Chewbacca plopped onto the couch and crossed his arms.

Rey shrugged. “We can watch a movie.”

Ben opened his mouth and Leia immediately stuck her hand in his face. “No _Galaxy Wars_!”

“But Mo-om!”

“Ben, I lived it. I don’t need to see it.”

Kylo paced the lounge, growling. “We should be TRAINING! Doing something to PREPARE!”

“Kylo, honey, sometimes it’s a good idea to relax and unwind, especially before a big battle.”

Kylo sunk his hand into his hair and gripped with a groan of frustration. “I can’t unwind! It won’t turn off!”

Leia stood and took his hand. At her touch, Kylo just stopped and stared at her. Leia smiled and waved toward a seat. “Sit Kylo and just breathe. Just watch your breath.”

Kylo plopped into a seat, but he didn’t look at all confrontational. Leia patted his shoulder. “That’s it, now just close your eyes and feel your breath going in and out.”

His eye twitched, but he eventually lowered his eyelids, his chest rising and falling.

“That’s it, Kylo. A little rest and stillness will help you find the center of yourself. You feeling any calmer?”

Kylo opened his eyes and quirked his head. “A little.”

“Good. You want some milk?”

Kylo tipped his head down. “Yes. Um…please.”

Leia rubbed a hand over his head and smiled. “I’ll go get you some.”

Ben smiled. It warmed his heart to see his mother and brother bond in a way Ben cherished.

“I don’t know if I can watch a movie,” Jannah said. “With a battle ahead, there’s too much on my mind.”

Ben perked. “I have something that can engage our minds and still be relaxing at the same time.”

#

Ben set up his privacy screen on the table in the galley and tossed the dice in the center. “Caverns and Rancors!”

“What the hell is this crap?” Han asked.

“Shut up, Dad! It’s the perfect blend of imagination and strategy. You all get to play as characters in a game I run and you get to make decisions based on the dice roll. I’m the Cavern Master.” Chewbacca bellowed at him. “Because I’m the one that runs the game and tells you what’s happening. Open the files I just sent you on your comms and we’ll start building your characters.”

Finn asked, “Can’t we just make up what we want?”

“To be fair, certain things have to be determined by dice roll. So pick your character class up top—”

“Pirate!” Rey said.

“I think that’s under the Rogues category.” Chewbacca roared at him. “Look I didn’t make the game! I don’t know why Wookiees are in the Other category!”

Kylo poked at his projection. “I want to be the guy that kills stuff.”

“Try the Warriors category.”

Han sat with his arms crossed. “I want to be the guy that doesn’t play this crap.”

“Da-ad! Mom!”

Leia shoved Han’s arm. “Play the damn game, will you? Ben, what should I be?”

“Well, you always make me feel better, so maybe a Healer. Now, every attribute is determined by a dice roll, so roll for each. The attributes description will tell you what dice shape you should use.”

Finn scratched his head. “So this game is about building characters using dice?”

“No! We haven’t played yet. You have to build your characters first—”

Kylo shrieked and slammed his hand on the table.

Ben nearly sprung out of his seat. “Shit! What?!”

“I got a 1 for Charisma! That’s the lowest you can go!”

“Well, it is what it is—”

“I have a LOT OF FUCKING CHARISMA!”

Ben cringed. “You sure do Kylo, but your character doesn’t—and that’s okay! That means he’s scary and doesn’t take shit from anyone.” Ben tried to smile, hoping he bought it.

Kylo calmed. “Oh…okay.”

Han tossed his dice and rubbed his forehead. “Can my character carry a jug of whiskey wherever he goes?”

Ben processed the characters from behind his screen. “Yeah but you have to buy it from the store after you roll for galactic credits.”

“Yeah, well, in the meantime, I’m going to get me a real jug. Gonna need it for this shit.”

#

“…but when you turn the corner,” Ben said, his eyes wide, fingers wiggling in the faces of his players, “you see there is no chest, only three doors, each a different color. What do you do?”

“Quit this fucking game,” Han said.

“Why is there no chest?!” Kylo said, panic in his face. “You said there would be a chest!”

“Because,” Ben said, “the orc lied, that’s what orcs do.”

“Then I want to kill the orc!”

“Wouldn’t you rather pick a door?”

“That orc should DIE FOR HIS TREACHERY!”

Ben sighed and sat back in his seat. “Does anyone else want to go back and kill the orc?”

The crew, in various stages of fatigue, just sighed and groaned. Rey was using her arm as a pillow and flopped from one side to the other.

“Ben,” Leia said, “we’ve been at this for hours. I think my orc’s getting tired.”

Han leaned into her face with a grin. “I think my orc’s just getting started.” He snickered and kissed her ear.

Ben groaned. “Mom, you’re not the orc, you’re the Healer!”

Rey dragged herself up from the table. “Ben, maybe we should quit this for now and pick it up some other time. Don’t get me wrong, it was fun, very imaginative, I wish my adventures were as fun as this, but I think we all just need a little break.”

Kylo sat up in a panic. “But…what about the Rancor! We never got to fight the Rancor!”

Rey turned off her projection, and that started a chain reaction of shut downs around the group. “We’ll fight him next time.”

Kylo sprung out of his seat and tensed his muscles. “COME ON! I’m a warrior, I’m supposed to DEFEAT MY ENEMY! And kill that treacherous fucking orc that lied to us!”

Ben looked around in a panic. “Okay, okay, Kylo, why don’t you pick the red door and maybe there will be a Rancor behind it.”

Kylo sat back down, excited again. “Okay! I…open the red door.”

“Hey look, a Rancor!”

“YES! So I go and STAB HIM IN THE FACE!” He thrust his fist down onto the table over and over.

“Kylo, you have to roll for it!”

Kylo roared and threw the 20-sided die so hard on the table it bounced off and flew across the room. Ben slipped over it to it and saw the number 1 as the end result.

Ben pressed his lips together and picked up the die. “Yes! Kylo! You got a 20! You totally stab the Rancor in the face and kill it!”

“YES!” Kylo jumped up, his fists balled, arm muscles locked like iron. “So I won the game?”

“You totally won!”

“YEEES! Wait, what about that treacherous orc?”

Ben licked his lips. “The Rancor fell on him. He’s dead, too.”

“YES! That will teach him to FUCK WITH ME!” He thrust his fists out, jumped up and down, then dove to the floor. He pushed up from the ground and clapped, up-clap, up-clap. “Victory—makes me—want to—kick some ass!”

Leia leaned over. “Honey, why don’t you burn off some of that energy in the cargo hold? Lot more room in there. Maybe you can practice that dancing game. That looked fun.”

Kylo sprung to his feet like he was immune to gravity. “That’s a great idea, General…” He looked back and forth from Ben to Leia. “Um…Mo—om…?”

Ben beamed. Leia blinked in surprise. Then, in that special way of hers, she softened into a smile. “If that’s what you’d like to call me, you can.”

The corners of Kylo’s mouth twitched upward. He was almost smiling yet resisting as if unsure if he should. “I never had a mom before. I don’t know how to have one.”

Leia took his hands in hers. “Well, you start by being respectful and kind, and I’ll do the same in return and take care of you while teaching you how to take care of yourself.”

Han snorted. “You forget to teach that last part to Ben?”

Ben squeezed his lips together in anger. “Dad, shut up!”

Kylo looked at the two men. “Is that how to have a dad?”

Leia smiled and squeezed his hands. “I wouldn’t go by them. The most important thing is that no matter what, even if we don’t always agree or get along, we love each other.”

“Ben says I’m capable of love. I don’t really understand how to do it right yet, though.”

“Oh Kylo, love isn’t something you do. When you love someone, you can’t help but give of yourself for them, not because of any reward but because it feels so good and right to do so. I think you know what that’s like, and I think you know more about love than you realize.”

Kylo looked up and squinted his eyes in thought. “I think I understand. This is confusing.”

“I know. You’re just getting started, but you’ll get the hang of it soon, you’ll see.” She shook his hands. “Go on, go work off your energy so you can get a good night’s sleep. Busy day tomorrow.”

Kylo’s lips held their position for few moments before he burst into a broad smile. He nodded and ran off to the cargo hold. Finn stood with Jannah and said, “We’re going to continue our conversation in private if you don’t mind.”

Leia straightened her dress. “I think Han and I have had it for the night, going to turn in.”

Ben kissed her on the cheek. “Night, Mom, and uh…thanks for being so nice to Kylo. I know you two were on opposite sides of a war until this morning.”

Leia played with her necklace. “It’s an adjustment. I didn’t wake up this morning thinking I would have another adult son by the end of the day, especially one we’ve been fighting against. But…he’s our son, through whatever means, that’s what he is. And boy does he need some help.”

“Yeah, when we get home I have the feeling half my budget is going to go to therapists for him.”

Leia smiled up at him. “Come here, you.” She wrapped her arms around his stomach, barely rising past his chest. “I’m so proud of you. Doing all this stuff and taking him under your wing. I raised such an incredible man, and I couldn’t be more proud.”

Ben smiled and leaned his cheek against her head. “Aww, Mom.”

“I mean it, Ben. You really showed so much more of yourself than even I thought possible. I know how hard it is for you to engage with other people, and look at what you have now! A beautiful woman, a brother who needed a family, a friend. You’ve become everything I knew you could be and more.”

He gripped her. “Mooom, you’re gonna make me cry and then Dad’s gonna make fun of me.”

“Oh you cry all you want, I’ll kick his ass for you.”

Ben laughed, kissed his mother’s forehead and let her go. “Have a good night, Mom.”

As he cleaned up the game, Rey sat on the table and crossed her legs. “So, what now?”

Ben poured the dice into a cloth bag. “I was thinking of hitting the shower.” He smiled briefly, but it dropped. “Honestly, without the game to keep my mind busy, my stomach is going back into a jumble of knots thinking about tomorrow. I’m trying not to make myself sick. Maybe the shower will relax me a little.”

Rey nodded. “Probably a good idea. We’ll figure out the rest of the night after.”

#

Rey was bored out of her mind while Ben was in the shower. Chewbacca had offered to play holo-chess, but she was absolutely not interested. Besides, they had a similar temperament, and she was sure the game would end with the both of them pointing guns at one another.

Instead, she strolled the ship and eventually wandered to the bathroom. She could hear the water going, could feel his presence inside. Her mind wandered to the moment when the guys were wrestling, cargo hold permeated with muscles and musk and all that ebony hair whipping around.

 _Fuck it!_ She tried the door and found it unlocked. Well, that was convenient. She stepped inside and let the sliding door close behind her. Past the sink and stall, straight ahead, Ben’s big dark head rose above the shower door. Water poured from the high showerhead installed specifically for Chewbacca but suiting Ben’s giant self just fine.

Behind the frosted glass, that body of his moved and turned, hands running up and down his body. Yeah, she had to get in on this. Just as she was about to get his attention, his eyes lit on her.

“GAH-HA!” Ben sprung into the air and had to grab onto the shower door to keep from falling on his ass. His chest heaving, he tipped back against the wall. “Rey, why?!”

Rey stuck her finger up. “I was just about to warn you I was here. I know you startle easily.”

Taking in deep breaths, he closed his eyes, swallowed, and was back to himself. “Everything okay? You need something?”

Rey leaned against the wall. “Just you.”

Those beautiful eyes turned to crescents amidst his smile. His eyes wandered the shower. “It’s pretty tight in here.”

Rey sighed. “Yeah, I know. Open the shower door.”

Ben hit the sensor and stood there, so incredibly naked with crystal rivulets of water cascading down his skin. His eyes regarded her with a mix of confusion and curiosity. “Now what?”

Rey waved her fingers toward him. “Now carry on. As you were. I want to see lots of suds.”

His eyes still on her, he stuck his hand under the soap dispenser. Rey watched with satisfaction as he slid his hands over his muscles, beneath his arms, down over those powerful legs, all while the water cast the bubbles away.

“Fun fact,” Ben said, his voice dark and deep, “a soap bubble won’t form outside the ship due to the lack of exterior air pressure to counterbalance the pressure from within.”

Rey rubbed her legs together. “I think that’s the sexiest fun fact I’ve ever heard.”

Ben tipped his head back. “You like what you see?”

Rey licked her fingertip. “I like everything I see. In fact I like it so much, I think I want to have some for myself.”

Sly eyes widened, soft grin of anticipation flooding his face. Rey stepped over, grasped the upper bar of the shower door track and hung from it. “I couldn’t take my eyes off of you when you were playing Holo-dancer. So sweaty, strong, so tough and serious. You have no idea what I was thinking of doing to you.”

His chest rose and fell. “Really?”

Rey tipped her head aside. “What I was thinking was how I’d really love to lick every droplet of sweat from your body, long…” She licked her fingertip and popped it out of her mouth. “…and slow.”

His mouth fell open. “Oh holy shit.”

She looked down at his most attentive part. Yep, that didn’t take much. “But…now that you’re all nice and clean, maybe I can dry you with my tongue.”

Ben stuck his bottom lip between his teeth. “Ffffff…”

“You like that idea?”

He nodded vehemently.

She looked down again. “I can tell. So how about I—”

The door behind her slid open and Chewbacca came roaring into the bathroom. Ben shrieked and leapt once more, trying to cover his sizable intimate part and honestly failing. His cheeks turning a flaming shade of red, he tried to hide his bare body behind Rey. “Damnit Uncle Chewy! I’m busy!” His uncle had an equally loud response. “I wasn’t doing that! I was just trying to take a shower!” This response had some flailing, hairy arms and Rey really needed to learn his language because this looked hilarious. “Oh what the hell do you need to shower for, you’re just gonna get dirty tomorrow during the battle!” Chewbacca charged at him, and Ben shrunk into the corner of the shower, trying to shield his nakedness. “Alright alright! Just let me finish, okay?” One more bellow. “THE SHOWER! LET ME FINISH THE SHOWER!”

Rey fell against the wall, laughing so hard she wasn’t sure if she could walk. Ben gave her a desperate, aching look before he signaled the shower door to close again. Rey waved him off and headed out of the bathroom. “Come find me when you’re done. And Chewy? Be nice, huh? Life or death battle tomorrow. Some of us want to have some fun before then.”

Rey waited for Ben in the lounge, and it wasn’t more than a five minutes when he came running over, hair a damp mess of swirls. There he stood, looking like he had fought through a series of angry knights and red-clad guards to stand by her side in that moment.

She spread her legs wide and lounged back. “You come in here looking like that, you better be ready to give me the time of my life.”

He stepped closer, dark fire in his eyes, and reached out with one hand. “Join me.” His lip quirked. “Please?”

Without needing to inquire further, she grasped his hand. He hoisted her to her feet, and in one smooth motion she leapt up onto him, wrapping her legs around his waist. He grasped onto her, and she sunk her fingers in to the warmth of his damp tresses, pressing a kiss of a thousand heavens onto those thick, luscious lips.

Moaning and purring, he carried her over to the technical station. With the Force, he whipped aside all his tools onto the ground and planted her bottom there. Arms now around her back, his giant body and hungry kiss engulfed her. His rigid thickness pressed up against her aching mound, and if he just took her right here, right in full view of anyone that could walk through, she’d totally let him do it.

Another garbled bellowing wrecked the moment. Ben, wide-eyed in fury, turned toward his soggy uncle. “Do you really have to be EVERYWHERE I’M TRYING TO BE?!”

Chewbacca roared and whipped a soaked towel right into Ben’s face. Ben slammed it onto the ground and let out this shrieking growl like a steam explosion was about to occur. Chewbacca pointed, telling him to get the hell out of the lounge.

Rey shrugged. “Hey, why are we bothering here, anyway? Don’t we have a much better place to enjoy ourselves?”

Ben’s red-faced fury sprung to delight. “You’re right! Come on!” Ben pulled her into his arms, like he was carrying her as a bride to their destination, and sprinted down the corridor to that seldom-used storage area.

As he fiddled with the secret panel to the kinky bedroom, he swung his hips back and forth while singing. “I am going to have fun tonight—yeah! I am going to get some tonight—yeah!”

The door opened to the bedroom, and Ben screamed. “GAHHH! AAARGH! GAAHAAHARGH!”

Han and Leia already had that room. Han and Leia were in the middle of _enjoying_ that room!

Leia gasped from beneath Han. “What in the all holy hell—Ben?!”

Ben slammed his hands over his eyes, screamed again, turned and ran straight into a wall. Now he was on the floor howling and writhing, and Rey just could not, no matter how hard she tried, stop laughing.

“Damnit!” Han growled. “Shut the damn door!”

Rey threw her hands up, barely able to breathe. “I don’t know how!”

“You’re full of shit—the red button! The red button!”

“MY NOSE! GAH HA HA!” Ben cried.

Leia smacked Han’s arm over and over. “Damn you, Han! Why in the hell did you have to tell him about this room?”

Ben resorted to crawling on his elbows, slinking and pushing himself across the floor with his knees, hands over his eyes, still wailing in horror and complaining about his nose. Rey could barely walk as she slowly, so very slowly, made her way to the control panel.

“TODAY!” Han cried.

Rey placed her finger over the button and winked. “Looking good there, Han!” She pressed and continued laughing as the door slid closed.

“Shut up!” she heard before it sealed once more.

Rey fell against the wall and had to laugh into her knees and get it all out. Ben whimpered in the corridor, and she forced herself to crawl to him, barely able to keep herself up from laughing so damn hard.

She found him on his back, writhing, hands still over his eyes. “I can’t unsee it!” he squealed. “I can’t unsee!”

Rey tried to comfort him but only fell onto his stomach laughing.

Ben heaved in either sobs or laughs. “That’s my mom in there! My precious mommy!”

Rey, trying to catch her breath, said, “Well how do you think you were made?”

That just made him cry out in horror some more and she fell onto the floor, rolling onto her back, laughing while staring up at the ceiling. When she could finally catch her breath and things got quiet, she said, “Well, that will kill a boner, eh?”

Ben groaned and rubbed his fists into his eyes. “How do I ever look at them ever again?”

“Well, by tomorrow morning we’ll have worse things to worry about than naked, naked parents—”

“Noooo! You’re evil!”

“I told you! I warned you the entire time!”

Ben let his hands drop from his eyes. “Torture this poor young Jedi boy with visions of horror.”

Rey rolled over and slid a hand over his chest. “Oh we Sith girls just _love_ torturing innocent Jedi boys.”

Ben placed his hand on his forehead and laughed. “I cannot believe that just happened.”

“How’s your nose?”

“Sore, but it will survive. Okay, please, for the love of the Force, wash that vision out of my head with something else.”

Rey rose to her knees and lifted her shirt and bra. Ben sprung up, eyes locked on her bare breasts. “That will do.” He stood and grabbed her hand. “Come on! We will salvage this night yet!”

Down the corridors, past the lounge where Chewbacca gave them a dirty look and on to the bunk room. Ben signaled the door to open and got no response. “Shit, it’s locked.” He banged on the outside. “Hey? Someone in there?”

“Ohhhh,” came Finn’s voice from inside, “who’s trying to be a cock-fucking-blocker now?”

Ben clenched his teeth. “You are!”

“Snooze you lose, my friend. Bunk room is off limits until I—I mean we—are good and done in here.” Just as Ben was about to retort, Finn said, “And Rey, don’t even think of throwing those doors open yourself. Give someone else a chance for a change.”

Ben sunk against the wall. “What are we gonna do now?”

Rey shrugged. “Finn’s busy, therefore he won’t walk in on us this time. How about the cargo hold?”

Ben perked. “Yes! Come on!”

The two of them jogged down the hall and entered the hold. Rey held up her fingers to stop Ben, hearing something odd. She put her fingers to her lips and waved him on, tip-toeing into the hold. A tapping? Smacking? Humming, perhaps?

Around a stack of crates, she found the source. “Kylo?!”

Ben gasped. “Melanie!”

Kylo, his shirt off, slowly turned from Ben’s droid, his lips swollen and pink. “Oh. Hello. It’s…um…not what you think.”

Rey crossed her arms. “I think you’re making out with a droid.”

Kylo licked his lips. “Okay, maybe it is—b-but she called me a sexy beast.”

Rey ran out of things to say, so she turned to Ben.

Ben smiled and patted his brother on the back. “It’s fine, bro. She’s totally a sexbot.” He waved. “Have fun! And be nice to her!”

Melanie winked. “I’ll take good care of your brother, Dr. Solo.”

Ben’s smile grew enormous, cheeks ridiculously pink. “I know you will—come on, Rey!” He grasped her hand and made a hasty exit out of the cargo hold. After closing the door behind him, he fell against it, laughing into a red-faced silence.

Rey joined him. “What happened to ‘Not a sexbot!’?”

“I was a thirty-year-old virgin who made droids! What did you think was going to happen?” He laughed into his arms. “I can’t believe I just admitted that to you.”

She drew her fingers along his dimples, that face so red it carried all the way down his neck. “It doesn’t bother me. We do what we do to soothe ourselves. We’re only human.” His face softened, humiliation draining away. “I don’t care about any of that. That beautiful body of yours just needed some comfort.” She kissed his lips. “Some pleasure.” She kissed his burning cheek and matching neck. “Something I’m happy to give you now.”

The smile left his face, replaced by that soft grin of desire. “Where do we go?”

She straddled his waist. “I don’t know. Galley? Bare asses on the dinner table?”

“That sounds like a whole lot of pathogens.” He smiled, but then his eyes brightened, an idea dawning in them. “Rey, can you fly a ship in case of emergency?”

“Of course, who can’t?”

Ben tipped his forehead toward hers.

“Uh—uh I mean, yeah, of course, because I’m a space pirate. Why?”

He waggled his eyebrows. “I have a place we can go.”

#

Inside the cockpit of the Falcon, Rey slid into the copilot chair while Ben signaled the door to close behind him. The streaking blue of hyperspace lit the room, controls twinkling in the dim space.

“I feel so naughty,” Ben said. “If my father knew I was in here, door closed…” He smirked. “Actually, that’s turning me on even more.”

Rey crossed her legs and slid one over the other. “This Sith girl is rubbing off on her bad little Jedi boy.”

Ben gave a sensuous chuckle and strolled over to the pilot’s seat. With care and hesitation, he inched himself down and leaned against the backrest.

“How does that feel, Captain Solo?”

“Aaaand I’m already hard.”

“Surprised you’re ever soft.”

“Lately, I’m not sure that I am.”

Rey stood and straddled him, settling down right against his stiffness. Those onyx eyes of his grew hazy, soft dopey smile on his kissable mouth. “Where are you taking me tonight, Captain?”

His hands slid around her back and down to her rear. “To heaven.”

Rey pressed her palms to his soft cheeks and slid over his face until her fingers tangled in his hair. She pulled him into a kiss and savored the silky smooth black locks as they sifted through her fingers. He always had the most beautiful hair, and she loved how his entire being softened when she stroked his scalp.

Not so long ago, he was a nervous wreck, fainting at her touch, shaking in her presence. Now he melted and yielded to her, yet stood so strong as her equal.

Rey took her kisses along his cheek, over his jaw, and to that long neck of his, pulsing with heat, bobbing with his thirsty swallows. Breaths poured out of him as she savored his smoothness with her tongue, hot wet kisses that made him moan.

She enjoyed making him feel so good. Most of the men she had been with never truly appreciated her, focused more on the act than anything else. With Ben, she knew every kiss she gave meant the universe to him. She could have just kissed him and nothing else and he would have been just as delighted.

Rey gripped his shirt and pulled it up over his head, his waves spilling down around his face and neck, ebony against the sun-averse lightness of his skin. She ran her hands over the peaks and valleys of his chest, sifting her fingers through the scant hairs at the center.

“I love this body of yours,” she said, running her tongue across a smooth pec.

He nuzzled his face into her hair while sinking his fingers into her own waves. “I love yours,” he whispered, the heat of his breath sending tingles down her entire body, “so…so very much.” Another breath, another soothing, tingling wave. “I never thought a woman like you could ever love someone like me.”

She straightened, gathering his cheeks in her hands once more. “Someone like you? Ben, you are the most beautiful person I have ever known, inside and out.” She kissed those soft, thick, pillowy lips. “I’m honored to kiss you.” And did just so. “Love you.” She gave a long, wet, deep suckle to his neck that made his body shudder. “And pleasure you.” She ground up against his hardness, the thickness of him exciting her most sensitive regions. Just the thought of that girth and length deep inside her made her want to rip everything off of him and take him hard and fast.

He tipped his head back, eyes squeezing closed, brow upturned, aching, so deeply aching for her, so deeply in love with her. Nah, no hard and fast for him, not now. One day, but for now he needed to be treated to magic.

If they only had one more night together, it would be perfection. He deserved every bit of it for being everything that he was, everything he never saw but was so clear to her.

He truly was like that little rock he had given her, glowing with glory but only when the right light shone upon him.

She slid her fingertips up the side of his neck, cradled his head, and kissed that mouth so deeply it made him flail his arms before he caught sense enough to wrap them around her. In some ways, she hoped he’d never lose that over-excitement and awkwardness. He was just so adorable and charming in that precious dorky way of his, never pretending to be anything except who he was.

Rey took her kisses down the ridge of his throat, over that smooth chest that heaved with his breaths, down a surprisingly muscled yet delicately soft stomach that arched in anticipation as she made her way down, to the line of his black hairs that led her where she wanted to go.

She unbuckled his belt while he gripped the sides of the pilot’s chair. Once his button was open, he tilted his head back, chest rising so high with his deep breaths. With a smirk, she pulled down his zipper slowly, delighting as his breaths shuddered with anticipation. She pulled the pants open just to marvel at the bulge beneath, hidden by that dark fabric that hugged him in all the right ways. Her fingertips stroked that rocky heat, and she smiled as his breath hitched.

With gentle strokes she looked up at him. “So needy, even after everything we did last night.”

His muscles were so rigid as he pressed himself against the backrest. “I’m never going to stop needing you…just as much…as the first time.” She responded to this by nuzzling his manhood with her mouth. “Oh holy fucking shit. Oh Rey, what are you doing to me…oh stars Rey…”

She gripped the waistbands of his pants and underwear at once. “Not nearly enough, not yet.” She pulled, and he arched up to let her undress him. She tossed his clothes by the sliding door to the cockpit.

He chuckled as he looked around, his knuckles white as he gripped the seat. “Hooooly shit I’m naked in my father’s chair.”

“No, this isn’t your father’s chair. You are Captain Ben Solo, commander of the Millennium Falcon, and I am your copilot and designated ass-kicker when we run into trouble.”

“And I’m also the chief science officer.”

Rey took in a breath and widened her eyes in exasperation. “Okay, you are also the chief science officer.” She grinned. “And you just collected an entire crate worth of mineral samples from a new planet, minerals that aren’t even _named_ in any database!”

Ben moaned and tipped his head back again, grabbing himself with his right hand.

“And when we get to your lab back on Chandrila, you are going to…find out…what kinds of elements—”

“Oh fuck yes, elements, you are so hot…”

“—they contain…and maybe even discover new elements—”

“Ohhhh you’re driving me crazy.”

“—and they will be officially named after you. Solonium.”

His head lolled to the side. “Ohhhh fuck Rey, take me, I need you, oh I need you so bad.”

“Oh yeah? How bad do you need me?”

“So…bad I’m gonna…name the other element after you. Reynarium.”

Rey wasn’t sure how that translated to how badly he wanted her, but took it as a compliment. She pulled his hand from his upright hardness and gripped it with both of hers. Its hot, silken skin over massive rigidity was nothing but pure delight against her fingers. One of his hands sunk into his hair while the other gripped the seat.

She hovered her hot breath over his tip while his chest rose and fell in rapid succession. “And then you’re going to create a polymer with those elements, and it will revolutionize the galaxy so much, when you search for Solo, Ben will be the first six hundred million results.” With that, she took him into her mouth, sliding her tongue along his delicate smoothness and ridges.

Ben let out this long and winding cry, and if she wasn’t already at the gate, she would have thought he’d finished. She watched his movements as she suckled him as deep as she could possibly go with that gargantuan member. He kept thrusting one hand then the other through his hair, brow upturned, aching and overwhelmed, flopping from side to side. He finally opened his eyes and stared out the cockpit transparasteel windows, chest heaving, beautiful little cries of pleasure spilling from those thick, delicious lips.

“Oh Rey, I can’t believe this is happening. I’m…I’m…getting blown on the pilot’s chair of the Falcon!”

She chuckled, and it made his breath hitch.

His gaze softened. “Oh I love you Rey. You know…you know me…you really know me, everything, the depth, the…you are everything to me.”

She gave one last elongated suckle that trailed the length of him, gave it a kiss, and stood. While he watched her, writhing in that seat, she pulled off her top, flung off her bra, and reached for the buckle on her gun-belt.

“No!” he said, eyes trailing her up and down. “Leave that on.”

And just like that, she knew how much he understood her, too. She pulled off her pants and undergarments, flung them into the pile on top of his, and straddled him on the chair.

His widened, needy eyes raced up and down her body. “Just like this? Right here?”

“Right on the captain’s chair.”

That incredible smile lit up his entire face before that bottom lip was in his teeth once again. Taking him into her was an exercise in adjustment, but in no time she filled with every inch of him hitting just the right spots. He watched her hips as she arched against his body.

“Can I touch you?” he whispered.

“You can always touch me.”

He reached down, but first he slid his hands over her gun-belt, then over the guns themselves as well as her lightsaber. He understood the intimacy with them, how important her ensemble was to her, how it had been an extension of her, and her very survival in a world of constant death.

One hand held her hip at the gun-belt while the other slipped down to find her bud that ached in desperation. Once he stroked the right spot, she nodded. “Yeah, that’s it. Just like that.”

She sunk her hands into his hair once more and met his face nose to nose, eyes locked on one another, breaths mingled as one.

His eyes closed and he sunk beneath her chin, pulling her close. Holding onto him while his body trembled in her arms, she understood how this was more than just a want and need for him. This closeness soothed an ache that had plagued him for so many years, to just be close to someone that wanted him as badly as he wanted her.

“Rey, stop.”

She did, and he just breathed into her chest, not moving. His eyelashes tickled her skin as he tried to steady himself again, hold back.

“I don’t want this to end,” he whispered. “Let me pleasure you, just don’t move, not yet.”

He took her breast into his mouth, his tongue circling her peak before giving a little nibble with his lips. His finger still stroked her, so attentive despite his painful grip on controlling himself.

Sensuous kisses ran up from her breast to her neck, her sweet spot. And when he nibbled at her skin, her body just melted, giving itself completely over to him. “Sit in the copilot’s chair,” he whispered hot into her ear.

Rey slid off of him and draped into the seat opposite his, her elbow on the armrest, finger to her mouth, legs wide open and waiting. Ben dipped to the floor and planted his face in her center, his tongue, so hot and wet, parting her lips and finding the center of her aching need. First the teasing tastes, then the flapping licks, but it was when he centered his lips over it and bore down, his tongue creating this rhythmic suckling that encompassed the entirety of her most sensitive parts, that was her time to fall apart in the chair. Two of his fingers slid inside this time, teasing at just her right spot, and quite honestly it was the best anyone had ever done for her.

He knew what she liked and forgot his own needs, just working her from below. All she could see was that delightfully prominent nose and a mess of midnight waves while the blue of hyperspace surrounded them.

As he drew her closer to the edge, she eyed the room and found just the right spot. “Ben, let me up.”

He looked up at her, his lips swollen and pink, and damn didn’t he look so good that way. She nodded toward the control panel. “I want you to take me, hard, fast, and now.”

He slid his fingers out of her and stood, eyes wide and hungry. She stood, adjusted her gun-belt, and arched her body over the control panel, keeping herself at a good distance with her hands. “Take me from behind.”

“Ohhh wow,” he said and licked his lips. She felt the warmth of his lower stomach press against her rear while long fingers sought her entrance. Target achieved, he filled her once again, and from this angle just revved against her perfect spot.

His thrusts pounded at her, merciless and incredible amidst hissing, gasping breaths while his huge hands braced against her back. She turned to look at him, found those eyes hazy in ecstasy, teeth against his bottom lip, pale chest so flushed.

“Hey,” she said, “imagine flying your father’s ship like this.”

“Ohhhh fuck you could make me come with just your words alone, you know that?”

She giggled and focused back on the endless pleasure he was giving her. She was having trouble keeping herself contained, his incredible body pushing her right over the edge already.

Then he slipped out, head whipped back, panting, needing another break. He had so much control for someone so inexperienced, and she was deeply proud of him.

She turned and just ran her hands over his skin, let him calm but kept him loved and appreciated. Rey adored the feel of him beneath her palms, that chest, those thick arms, those broad shoulders. She drew around and rubbed all over his back, finding just as much delight in that broad expanse.

“Sit back down,” she said. “I want to feel your body against mine.”

Ben plopped himself back into the pilot’s seat, jaw quivering in anticipation. She straddled him once more, slipping over his thickness, and bucked against him with just as much energy as he had shown her. His finger reached back down to warm her back up again.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, his voice wavering in his own intoxication. His breaths sped up.

“And you,” she said, feeling herself growing closer to the edge, “are just incredible.” A few more thrusts and she could feel herself cresting. “Ben hold me.” He wrapped his arms around her and she pulled his head against her breasts, holding that black mane as that incredible feeling washed over her again.

Nothing like a regular orgasm.

This was something else, so beyond bodies, esoteric even. His chest expanded with every giant breath, letting himself surrender to ecstasy. As she joined him, she felt his aching need to be loved, a yearning so deep it shook him to his center. When their energies merged, and she met him in that space, that lonely, hiding creature opened fully to himself and the universe. There was no more ache inside of him. He was free and powerful and magnificent.

She cried out as she gripped his head against her chest, and he growled into a heavenly cry of his own.

Rey held him there as he breathed against her chest. He didn’t want to let her go either. They just remained, two as one, basking in the glory of their union. Called from two very different lives, two very different origins, darkness and light, light and darkness, merged as one, the perfection union from which all creation began.

She looked down at him and just watched as the soft blue illuminated his light skin, eyes blinking, contentment. Why did they ever have to part? Why not remain just like this forever?

Of course, they couldn’t. She tried to get up, but he held her tighter. “Don’t go,” he whispered. “Stay…stay like this a little longer.”

She kissed his head and stroked his hair again, just how he liked. The soft sigh he gave when she did that always made her feel so good, that she could soothe him when he needed it, such a little thing for such a precious man.

And there they remained until he fell out of her with a simple shift. He chuckled and finally looked up at her, such peace and perfection in his gaze.

“My father will totally fucking kill me if he finds out about this.”

Rey stroked his nose. “Or be proud, you know him. Just tell him we finally put the cock in cockpit.”

He laughed and buried his face in her breasts. “Ohhh Rey. This was so perfect. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”

She kissed his forehead. “Me too, Ben, believe me.”

She tilted his chin up and kissed him deeply, surrounded by the plethora of transparasteel windows, blue light of hyperspace bathing their skin, the pirate/warrior and her scientist/captain at the helm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those unfamiliar, Caverns and Rancors is meant to be the space version of Dungeons and Dragons. For those very familiar, if I didn't get any detail right, it's because I haven't played in a very long time and I'm sure things have changed since then anyway. We'll just pretend this is how the space version is played. 
> 
> OMG Kylo playing Caverns and Rancors and taking it so seriously LOL! I laughed so hard writing that part. And Ben running into his parents, and Rey making everything worse LMAO! 
> 
> So the next chapters may take me some time. We're on to the big battle, and while I have started on it already, I'm not sure how big each section is going to be. I'm not sure how many chapters it will take, but I'm going to guess about 2-3. But this is a section I really want to get right because the sequence of insanity is important. I've added and subtracted a lot of ideas since I started writing this, so I want to make sure I include everything without making it an unholy mess. All I can tell you is that things will get ridiculous! After all, this IS Ben's plan! 
> 
> Follow me on Twitter! @shannon_enloe


	17. Time to Punch a Palpatine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben...OMG...What did you just do?!  
> It's the day of the big battle, and things don't quite go according to plan...
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't heard "Holding Out for a Hero" by Bonnie Tyler, do so now and come back. It will be more fun that way. Even better if you watch the clips of Ben set to the song.  
> Another song to load up would be "Kiss from a Rose" by Seal.  
> Onward to the insanity!

Ben was surprised he slept so deeply considering how nervous he was. Perhaps Rey’s heavy pawing of desire the night before was also a way to knock him out. Or, as she admitted, a result of seeing him hot and sweaty, wrestling his brother.

At least Finn eventually unlocked the bunk room door.

Ben looked across the way at his brother, who also slept soundly. This sort of thing—going into battle and facing death—must be normal for Kylo and Rey. Either that or Melanie wore him out.

Ben turned back to the perfection in his arms. As he traced her perfect lines and curves with his eyes, his mind drifted to a song, singing to a girl about being the “light on the dark side of me.” He didn’t care what she said about herself. Rey would always be the light illuminating his darkness.

Whatever would happen this day, she and everything that came with her made this the best time he’d ever had in his life. He wouldn’t have traded it for anything. Before she walked through the front door, his life had its pursuits, but he himself had just been stagnant and dim. Being with her made him come alive. He became everything he could be with her guidance and support. Even his relationship with his father had blossomed. And finally there was Kylo, an enemy turned family who gave Ben a chance to expand his heart in ways he never dreamed.

If it all ended today, he’d still come out the winner.

Rey stirred and kissed his bare chest. “What time is it?”

“Eight. Four hours till Exegol.”

“Mm hm.” She nuzzled into his chest.

Just as he thought, she was way less nervous than he was.

“You okay?” she asked.

“Just trying not to think about it.”

“Mm, this would be a good time to do math. That always calms you.”

“I think I’m even too nervous for math!”

“Oh come on, what’s the most difficult equation there is?”

The visual sparked in his head, the beauty of its many parts in an endless expanse before his mind’s eye. “Oh yeah, that’s helping.”

Kylo abruptly lifted on his hands, dark hunter’s eyes beneath tangled locks of hair.

Ben looked at him, concerned. “Kylo? Everything okay?”

Kylo’s nose briefly crinkled, head jerked. “Food.”

Ben sniffed the air and sat up. “Mommy’s breakfast!”

Two replicas nearly knocked each other over as they fought to be first on line. After a stern look from Leia, Ben hid behind Kylo and that’s how his brother wound up first.

Kylo grasped his heaping plate, awestruck. “Th-thank you, Mom.”

Leia smiled, and he returned it. “You’re welcome, Kylo.” As he dashed to a chair, Leia held out another plate for Ben. “And for my sweet muffin.”

Ben smiled with the depth of his soul. His special plate was sectioned perfectly. Nothing would ever touch, and it was all arranged in proper balance as the texture and flavor of one food complemented the one next to it. And the fruit section had a smiley face made of berries. “Mom, it’s perfect. Thank you.”

She touched his cheek. “Anything for you.”

Ben shifted. “Uh, about last night—”

“We went to bed, you went to bed, that’s all.” There was a hint of a grin and a glimmer in her eyes, but she went about her work as if nothing else needed to be discussed.

Ben nodded. “Right.” Before he sat next to Rey, he held his plate in front of his father. “See? See that? How hard is that? How hard is it to put each thing in a different section?”

Finn tapped Jannah’s shoulder. “Oh here it comes. Get ready for it.”

Han rolled his eyes, then cringed. “Damnit Leia, you made a face in his fruit for him?”

“The hell do you care?” Leia continued serving Chewbacca.

Kylo raised one finger, mouth full of eggs. “I had a fruit face too, but I ate it.”

Ben tipped his head toward his brother. “Remember our manners, Kylo. No talking with your mouth full.”

Kylo nodded and swallowed. “Right. You may punish me as you deem—”

“Argh, no punishing! Stop it with that. Yeesh, this is a happy time, happy breakfast. That’s why Mom gave us the smiley faces.” Ben returned to his argument way too close to Han’s face. “See? It’s the attention to detail that makes all the difference.”

Han stole a berry. “Now you have a cyclops.”

“Dad! Stop burgling! Mom! Dad’s robbing me!”

Jannah laughed into her arm beside Finn. “You were right!”

Leia pointed her spatula. “Stay off of Ben’s plate! I gave you plenty. He’s a big boy and needs his energy for today.”

Ben finally sat. “Yeah, _Dad_.” He picked up his fork and marveled at the plate. “Look at this, see Dad? This is what I was talking about. Look how Mom cooked the sausage. Hint of crispy with a residual sauce from cooking it at a lower temperature—”

Han put his hands to his head. “I don’t fucking _care_!”

“Well if you listened to me the other day when I said how to do it—”

“No one else complained. Only you. That’s what you’re good at. How come no one’s given you an award for complaining yet?”

Ben pointed with his fork. “I wouldn’t have to complain if you did it right the first time! I mean look, seriously, why was it so hard for you to use my special plate? Everything’s going to be perfect, and I won’t have to complain.”

Han pointed his fork back at him. “You are an ungrateful prima donna! Why don’t you learn to cook and you won’t have to complain!”

“I made an edible parachute. Don’t think I can’t make a perfect breakfast!”

Jannah shook her head. “Are they going to start fist-fighting over this?”

Finn stroked his chin. “Probably not, but stuff may get thrown around.”

Han straightened. “Know what? I’m going to show you a perfect breakfast.” He mashed his eggs into his sausage and potatoes, stirred, and one by one dropped pieces of fruit on it.

Ben inched backward, aghast. “What are you doing? Stop doing that!”

Han mashed the fruit into the mixture and squirted a spiral of ketchup all over the mess.

Ben shook his head in terror. “You can’t eat that. You just can’t!”

Han bobbed his head as if to say, “Watch me!” Then he grabbed a slice of bread, spread jelly on it, and scooped the mixture in his plate onto the bread.

“You can’t!” Ben cried, gripping his own plate and keep it far away from Han’s. “You just can’t!”

Han took a huge bite and moaned in satisfaction.

Ben screeched and got up from the table. He squeezed in next to Kylo and kept his body turned away. “Sick Dad! Really sick!”

Rey stopped her giggling enough to ask, “How is it?”

Han shrugged. “Pretty good, actually. I love how the jelly mixes with the sausage—”

“Dad STOP IT!” Ben put his hand over his mouth to quell the disgust.

Leia shoved Han’s arm. “Would you quit teasing him? All this nonsense just to drive him crazy.”

Han dropped his jaw and pointed at Ben. “He’s been driving me crazy this entire trip!”

“Well if you didn’t—”

“OW!” Ben cried. “Uncle Chewy!”

Leia drew the rogue spoon to her hand. “Really Chewy? You’re going to start this now? How many times do I have to tell you to leave him alone?”

“Yeah!”

Jannah laughed into her arms. “Oh my stars, this can’t be real.”

Kylo leaned in toward Rey. “Am I supposed to throw spoons too?”

Rey scrunched her face as she thought about it. “I wouldn’t.”

As soon as Leia turned to grab the salt, Chewbacca launched a small, orange fruit at Ben that popped him right in the forehead.

Ben squawked. “MOM! Uncle Chewy just hit me with a _bonba_ fruit! Damnit, you could’ve hit me in the eye! How am I supposed to fight Palpatine with one eye?!”

Leia hit her fists on the table. “Really, I turn my back for two seconds…”

Kylo eyed the fruit. “You gonna eat that?”

Ben shoved it over to him. “No—” He glared at Chewbacca. “—but it may have my SKIN CELLS on it!”

Kylo quickly peeled it. “Why do you let him hit you, anyway?”

“Uh, because he can lift me over his head and throw me across the room?”

Kylo shrugged and popped a piece into his mouth. “Don’t you have the Force?”

A light turned on in Ben’s head, and he pierced his uncle with his eyes. A wide grin spread across his face as Chewbacca quirked his head. With a raise of his hand, Chewbacca launched up in to the air, howling and flailing. Ben, giggling maniacally, kept him suspended there.

Leia dropped her jaw. “Oh my—Ben!”

“Ohhhh Mom, this is a long time coming.” Chewbacca roared and made Ben laugh even harder. “Oh yeah? Then I’m keeping you up there.”

Chewbacca’s next bellow made Han’s hair fly up. Han rolled his eyes and flung his hand at Ben. “Would you put him down already before he gets really mad?”

Ben twirled his finger. “But this is so fun. Look! He’s spinning like a mobile!”

Jannah cackled into her hands. “I’m so glad I rode this ship.”

Chewbacca bared his teeth and spewed an angry string of howls at Ben. With a shrug, Ben turned his hand and flipped Chewbacca upside down. “That’s too bad, Uncle Chewy. I almost considered putting you down for a second there, but now I think I’m going to wait for an apology.”

Leia threw her hand up and placed it on her head. “Ben, the two of you will be bones and dust before he ever apologizes for anything. Just put him down already so we can have a peaceful breakfast for once. And you need to save your energy, so knock it off, the both of you. Too old for this nonsense every damn day.”

Finn stuck his hand out, barely able to speak through his laughter. “Wait, this is every day? Are you serious?”

“Trust me, it stops being funny after a few years, definitely gets old after thirty.”

#

One more hour. That was all that was left.

Ben sat behind his father in the cockpit, waiting to drop out of hyperspace to rendezvous with the Resistance fleet and anyone else that heard Leia’s call to action.

“Pandemonium out there,” Han said. He tapped a button. The viewport screen showed a plethora of species across the galaxy in various forms of panic: screams, mobbed stores, riots, prayers, parties. Some were even betting on the outcome.

Leia shook her head. “I know we wanted everyone to take this threat seriously, but how did this spread so fast? Up until a few days ago, people were still ignoring it. What changed?”

Ben nodded. “True. My chief operating officer, Torbin, she didn’t believe me at first either, thought I was roleplaying. But I assured her the galaxy really was in imminent danger and Rey and I were the only ones that could stop it.”

Leia sat back. “Well that would do it. I don’t know whether to throw a sock at you or kiss you.”

“Throw a—wait, why?”

She turned to him. “We’ve been trying to get the major leaders of the worlds in the Senate to take this seriously and provide backup. You, as a CEO of a major corporation, told the public that the galaxy was in danger. Maybe not directly but certainly they got the message. So now we have the entire galaxy panicking, which isn’t good, but at least perhaps the Senate will quit being pains in the ass about it and provide resources, which _is_ good.”

Ben blinked. “So did I do good or bad?”

Leia patted his hand. “I guess we’ll have to let the final outcome decide that.”

Ben still wasn’t sure whether he’d done something wrong. He certainly didn’t intend to, but that was usually how he got in trouble, the Jedi Temple being the prime example.

The Falcon dropped out of hyperspace. The windows of the cockpit showed nothing but blackness and a glimmering dusting of stars. Then, popping into existence after a stream of light, ships appeared all around them. 

The numbers grew way beyond Ben’s expectations, blotting out the stars in the galaxy.

“They came,” Leia said beside him.

Han smiled. “Look at them all out there.”

The communication channels burst with ships checking in. Ben didn’t know most of them, but Han, Leia, and Chewbacca grew more excited as time went on. Rebels from the Galactic Civil War joined the cause alongside the Resistance, and still the massive fleet grew.

Leia gasped and stood, bracing her hands on the control panel. “The Senate came through! Those are military fleets from all united worlds!”

Ben still wasn’t entirely sure, but he was starting to think his constant yapping yielded good results this time.

“Black Leader, standing by,” Poe said over the link. Many more chimed in. Red leaders, Gold leaders, all their associated numbers.

“Lando!” Han cried and clapped his hands.

“Han!” came the smooth voice. “You better be treating my ship well out there, especially after what your kid did to it.”

Ben clenched his fists. “I could have FIXED IT, Uncle Lando!”

“Shut up, boy,” Han said.

More check-ins and then a voice Ben did not expect.

“Red Five, standing by.”

Ben dropped his jaw. “Uncle Luke?!”

“Hey kid. Ready for the big time?”

“Of course not, but I can’t believe you came!”

Finn jogged up from the corridor. “Luke?! I thought you were too busy at the Temple to join us?”

A sigh from Luke, then, “I wasn’t sure at first, of any of it. And when I learned the truth about what Palpatine was doing, I questioned my own validity in all this. Little miss pirate girl was right, something was definitely wrong if I hadn’t sensed it coming. Once I addressed my own problems, I knew I had to stand with my family and help take this son of a bitch and his army down for good.”

Leia leaned forward. “It also wouldn’t kill you to call every now and then!”

“Oh Leia, jeez, must we do this now? Every time I call you’re always pissed off at me!”

“You chased my son with a lightsaber!”

“You mean your muffin?”

“Oh don’t you start—I ain’t too old to kick your ass!”

Han grunted. “Tell me about it.”

Ben picked a perfect time to interject. “Yeah, um, Uncle Luke, it’s just great you could be here to help us out.”

“Hey kid.”

“Yeah?”

“I know what I feel on the Force, and I’m proud of you.”

Ben dropped his jaw. “What—really?”

“You can do this, kid. You earned that lightsaber in every way. Palpatine’s not gonna know what hit him.”

Ben let out a breath of shock and smiled. “Uncle Luke…thank you.”

“Now get in there and kick his ass for good this time.”

“I will.” Pumped by Luke’s belief in him, Ben knew it was time. “Guys, we have to get prepared. There’s still a lot to do before dropping us off. I just think maybe it would be a good time to say our goodb—I mean…give our well-wishes now. Hugs. Everything.”

Silence filled the cockpit. Then Leia turned. “That’s probably a good idea.” She turned her head up to Ben, then looked aside. “Why don’t I work my way from the back to the front?”

As she headed toward Finn and Jannah, Han passed Ben with a quick nod to stand before Rey. He put one hand on his hip and smiled at her. “You have been something else, little lady. Still don’t know what to make of you sometimes.” He put his free hand on her shoulder. “But you’ve grown on me. Almost come to think of you as one of my own. And I guess if Ben gets his way, that’s exactly what you’ll be one day.”

Rey smirked. “We’ll see.”

“Take care of yourself, and take care of Ben. He’s…grown a lot since being with you. You kids are good together. And I’m glad he found someone like you, someone who gets him and makes him step up and be the man we always knew he could be. And I don’t want to see that come to an end, so—” He pointed at her. “—I expect to see you waiting with him when we come to pick you up.”

Rey nodded. “We’ll be there.”

Han pulled her into a hug. “I like this crew a lot better with you in it. I hope this is the first of many trips you take with us. Could always use a Rock-Hound Sith Pirate, especially if I run afoul of the Hutts again.”

Rey chuckled. “I’d like that. Fly hard up there, Han.”

“And you fight hard and come back home, you got me, little lady?”

Ben turned at the hefty tap on his shoulder. Chewbacca stood before him, giant hairy arms wide. Ben threw himself into his uncle’s arms, all that fur a soothing comfort as it had been when he was a kid. Ben listened to Chewy’s soft gurgling. “I will, I promise.” After another statement, Ben smiled. “Thank you. I hope I can be everything you just said. Love you, Uncle Chewy.” Chewbacca murmured one more time and patted him on the head.

Now the big guy stood before Kylo and had something else to say. Kylo’s face twitched with lack of comprehension, but Ben started laughing.

Kylo, eyes still on Chewbacca, leaned in toward Ben. “What did he say?”

Ben tried to squelch his giggles. “He said to be tough out there, and Hairy Daddy will be waiting for you to come home.”

Kylo’s eyes widened, face a twitching mess like an electrical circuit had ruptured in his brain. He swallowed the reaction, nodded, and gave a quick thanks before hanging his head once more.

Han traded places with Chewbacca and stood before Kylo. Han stuffed his fingertips in his pockets. “I know we didn’t get off on the right foot, but…you’re still my son.”

Kylo looked up, bewildered.

Han shrugged. “You’re rough around the edges, but you have heart, and I know you’re trying real hard to be a member of this family.” He put his hand on Kylo’s shoulder. “You take care of these two down there. You make sure they come home.”

This Kylo seemed to understand better than the rest. “You have my word. None will harm them while I stand.”

Han nodded. “Good. And you promise me one more thing.”

“What’s that?”

“You bring yourself home too.”

Kylo’s eyes widened, eye and chin twitching. “Home?”

“Yeah. With us, either on the Falcon or on Chandrila, you have a home to come back to. A family.”

Kylo remained frozen. Ben was surprised he was breathing.

“Besides, you did a hell of a job flying the Falcon. And you know your way around a battlefield.” He shrugged again. “Got a few jobs you could help with, if you don’t mind flying through space with an old smuggler and a Wookiee.”

Kylo just stood there, mouth opening and closing.

Ben leaned in. “I think you broke Kylo.”

“On the contrary,” Leia said, standing before Rey now. “I think maybe he’s being mended.”

Kylo hung his head and stuffed his fingertips in his pockets, and it was only then Ben realized the stance was eerily similar to his father’s. Kylo nodded beneath his curtain of hair. “I’d like that.”

Han gave Kylo a hug the young man did his best to return, a quick Han hug that crammed all the goodness into the quickest of packages.

Leia, standing before Rey, drew the young woman’s hair forward, admiring her like a mother would a daughter. “I admit I don’t know you well, but I know what I feel. And I know what you’ve done for my son. I don’t even have to ask you to take good care of him down there. You would do it whether I said to or not.”

Rey nodded, a rare gaze of softness in her eyes. “I love him. With every part of me, I love him. He’ll always be everything to me.”

Leia put her hand to Rey’s cheek. “I know that feeling.” She drew her hands over Rey’s shoulders and down her arms. “And I know you’ll take good care of them both. You just make sure you take care of yourself too. Rey?” She put her hand to Rey’s cheek once more. “You must promise me that. Promise you’ll come home too. I can’t begin to tell you how much Ben loves you, but I know it to the depth of my being. You must come home with him, you hear me? You must continue to be a part of this family.”

Ben stopped wiping his eyes when the shock of the vision before him stilled his arms. Tears spilled down Rey’s cheeks, her lips quivering as she nodded, whispering a promise. Leia kissed her forehead, and Rey fell into her arms, sobbing. Just like Kylo, Rey had been welcomed home to a family that wanted her, that didn’t require her service to be accepted. Han, Leia, and Ben just wanted _her_ , and he could feel through their bond how much that meant to her.

Han stood before Ben, sighed, and tipped his head down. “Son.”

Ben swallowed. “Dad.”

Han shook his head. “I can’t believe I’m sending you down there to defeat Palpatine.”

Ben shrugged. “I have gotten better since the beginning of the trip. Full Force power and all.”

“No, dummy. I just can’t believe I’m sending my son…” Han turned aside and Ben saw the rarest of sights—tears in his father’s eyes.

Ben gripped his father’s arm. “Dad…”

Han pulled him into a tight, shaking hug. “You just come home, alright damnit? You just…you just be there waiting for me to pick you up. I’ll…even put your dinner on your special plate.”

Ben laughed in his father’s arms, which quickly turned to tears.

“You’re gonna be okay.” Han patted his back. “You’re gonna get in there and…kick his ass in all the ways you know how. You can do this, Ben. You _will_ do this.”

“Okay.”

“I love you son, so…so damn much.”

Ben didn’t want it to feel like a goodbye as he gripped his father’s jacket, crying so hard onto his shoulder. But damn it felt like it, especially when his stoic parent actually said the words _I love you_.

Ben sucked in a breath. “I love you too, Dad. No matter what happens, I’m glad we had this time together. It meant everything to me.”

“Me too, son. Me too.”

While Han and Ben continued their contest to see who would let go of the other one first, Leia stopped before Kylo. His eyes shifted everywhere but on her as he rocked on his heels. Then she drew her fingertips across his forehead, pushed his black hair out of his face, and trailed her hands down his wavy tresses. “You look so much like Ben.”

Kylo still couldn’t make eye contact with her. “I have a scar.”

“That’s okay. Makes it easier to tell you two apart.” She sighed and coaxed his gaze back to her by guiding his chin. “I never expected to find another son. I only wish I could have been there from the beginning, saved you from that hell Palpatine put you through.” She pushed his hair behind his ears. “I would have raised you right, taken care of you, taught you how to be your best self.”

Kylo blinked, but at least kept her gaze. “I would have liked that.”

Leia slid her hands to his shoulders and gave them a squeeze. “Well then, you have to promise you’ll come home to us, just like Rey and Ben. I can’t change what happened to you, but I can give you that same home I wish I could have given you then, where you’re loved and cherished just for being you.”

His arms trembled. “You would do that?”

“It’s a promise. So you have to make sure you come home, understand? You fight hard, you take care of your big brother, and you come home to a real family.”

Kylo tipped his head down and gave a single nod.

Leia gripped his cheeks and smiled. “You are so incredibly tall, just like your brother. Bend down a bit.”

Kylo, confused, obliged anyway and received a kiss on his cheek. His eyes sprung open, face so full of shock yet tempered with delight. Leia wrapped her arms around his chest, and after a few moments of bewilderment, Kylo put his arms around her and leaned his cheek on her head.

Ben adored watching what was unfolding before him—Kylo learning he was loved and learning to love in return. Yes, he had done plenty of awful things as a matter of survival. But now, a family, who knew his dark past, still accepted him as their own, gave him a home, and made him feel worthy of love. Whatever happened today, being able to give someone that gift made Ben feel like he had done right in the universe.

Leia touched a smiling Kylo’s cheek and then stood before Ben. Her smile was warm as usual but wistful yet still hopeful. “My sweet muffin.”

“Mommy.” Ben’s breath hitched. She wrapped her arms around him, and he immediately buried his tears in her hair as he held her against him. He swore he would not succumb to fear anymore, but reality finally sliced its claws into his consciousness, and it was so hard to take that next step.

Jaw trembling, Ben gripped his mother for support. “I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.”

“You do,” Leia whispered. “In fact, you always did.” She pulled back and cupped his face in her hands. “You are going to walk in there and do what you have to do, what only Ben Solo can do. You will fight and you will win. You have to, because you have to come back to me, with Rey and Kylo by your side. Fight for them, and for me, your father and Uncle Chewy, everyone who loves you, everyone who’s believing in you, counting on you. And finally, fight for yourself, because Ben Solo is worth fighting for. He is the shining light of the galaxy and you—” She tapped his chest with her finger. “—have to protect him, bring him home. Because I won’t accept any less. I intend to dance with my son at his wedding and attend symposium after symposium to watch you speak and accept awards. I want to see your name plastered all over the galaxy for your achievements. And if it’s the wish of the two of you, I want my arms full of grandbabies to love and spoil.” She poked him again. “So you are going to have to be here for all of that, understand?”

Ben smiled through his tears and nodded. “I will.”

“You have the blood of heroes in you, brave souls going back generations who fought past seemingly insurmountable odds. You can and will do this, Ben. I believe in you. We all do.”

He smoothed his hand over his mother’s hair. “I won’t let you or any of them down.” He kissed her cheek, and she smooshed a huge one onto his.

With a hand on his face and a loving smile, she said, “Go kick his ass.”

Ben nodded, smiled, and straightened. Time for this Skywalker to rise.

He waved for Kylo and Rey, but stopped at Finn and Jannah first. “Finn, I just want to thank you for being my first friend.”

Finn smiled and patted his arm. “But not your last. Fuck anyone who didn’t give you a chance before. You’re a great guy and a lot of fun.”

Ben smiled. “Thank you. Jannah, I know we haven’t known each other long, but I’d like to call you a friend too. After all, you did play Caverns and Rancors with me.”

Jannah stuck her finger up. “And Holo-dancer, don’t forget Holo-dancer.”

“Of course.” Ben chuckled, then took a deep breath. “I’ll leave a trail for you when I get through the compound. Wait for my signal.”

“A trail.” Finn snickered. “I can’t wait.”

“Oh it will be a classic.

Once Rey hugged Finn and told him not to get used to it, Ben turned to her and Kylo. “This is it.”

Rey put her hands on her hips. “It is.”

Ben couldn’t take the next step. It was too real now. Rey looked up at him with her tough face yet soft eyes. Kylo stood straight for once, eyes flitting between them.

Ben swallowed the rock in his throat. “I just want you two to know how much I love you, and of anything that’s kept me going, it’s been knowing it’s for you.”

Rey shifted her hips and tilted her head, soft smile on her lips. “I’ll always love you, Ben. You are my life.”

The tears rimmed his eyes once more. “And you mine.” He gathered her in a kiss, wanting just once more to taste heaven before walking into hell.

When they parted, Rey turned to their third. “And I love you too, Kylo.”

His eyes sprung wide, head quirked to the side.

“You are family, and you were the first to have ever understood me. I’ll always cherish having you in my life.”

Kylo gave the faintest of nods. He hung his head once more, but picked it back up, his eyes faintly red-rimmed. “I love you both. I only learned how to live and love because of you.” He swallowed. “Thank you for showing me.”

Ben gripped Rey and Kylo in his arms, eyes closed, holding on to them as if fate was already trying to rip them from his grasp. Rey felt so unusually soft in his embrace, yielding and delicate. Kylo gripped onto the two of them just as hard, a man who finally had a reason to live and love and wasn’t willing to give either up.

Ben kissed both of their heads, sucked in a breath and blew it out hard. “It’s time.”

They parted and started the walk down to the cargo hold. Rey was back to her usual self, pure confidence, disconnected from danger, ready to deal some hell. Kylo walked with fierce determination, no fear, no worry, laser targeted on his goal and ready to fight.

And Ben?

There was no more room for fear, anxiety, or what ifs. No time to question whether he was good enough or could do it. This time he walked with his head held high, ready, strangely ready for what destiny called him to do.

And if he had to go down? He would make it a miserable experience for anyone who dared, and evil across the galaxy would always fear the utterance of the name Ben Solo.

He grasped the bottle in his pants pocket, brought it to his mouth, and downed half of his Hyper-Fuel.

“Let’s get nerdy.”

#

Cold and draining, flashing with perpetual lightning, Exegol’s atmosphere hung with ominous bite and smelled stale and mechanical. Finn waited on Ben’s signal while Jannah’s troop poured from their ship. One last person stepped down a ramp holding a rope, and behind her strode those powerful orbaks. A mounted cavalry would keep things under control on the surface while another team led by Finn and Jannah would take to the interior.

It wasn’t long after the last rider mounted that Finn’s signal finally turned green. “It’s time.”

A map displayed on his projection, leading them to an entrance guarded by four Storm Troopers. Tech-bow arrows stuck into the guards, all but one who dodged the onslaught. This one Finn personally took to, felling him in three strikes from his lightsaber.

The inside was even colder and darker than outside, stinking of the sharp tang of metal and oil. At least the corridor was quiet and empty. Once he approached the next door, a message blinked. Finn tapped it and read the text followed by a grinning Ben emoji with long black hair. “Stand back from the door and I suggest earplugs and humming.” A little icon flashed with “Open” written on it.

Finn waved everyone back and told them to cover their ears before he tapped the icon. The door slid open, and officers ran screaming from the room. Finn looked at Jannah, who shrugged. With lightsaber up and a tech-bow aimed, they charged into the room. Finn had to stop as did the rest of the group and just ponder upon what they saw.

Up on the viewing screen was a dancing, obnoxious shark that stared into your soul while some irritating tune played on a loop, singing about a baby shark. Two officers danced to the video as if hypnotized, another rocked in a corner, and a third hit himself in the head repeatedly with a blunt object.

Jannah scratched her head. “What…what are we looking at?”

Finn tilted his head. “I don’t know, but this tune is getting on my nerves.”

“I don’t know. I think it’s cute. Well, let’s get in there.”

They only met opposition from the two dancing officers who quickly surrendered after being surrounded by tech-bows. Finn and Jannah grabbed them and tossed them out the entrance. They perked as if freed from a spell and ran like mad.

The group finally made it across that room when Jannah said, “Alright this shit is annoying as hell and we’ve only been here minutes. How long were they stuck like this?”

Finn checked his comm. “Possibly an hour if not more.”

“Yeah, I think I’d be bashing my skull in, too.”

After another empty corridor, a new message popped up once they got to the next door. “Definitely put in earplugs this time and hold your nose. This is not a drill!”

Finn looked to Jannah, who responded with a shrug. “Well, gear up.”

Once their squishy earplugs were set in place and fingers were upon noses, Finn punched the icon to open. More officers poured out, screaming, eyes wide in madness. Finn and Jannah crept in, and even with the earplugs in, they could hear the horrible digital noises screaming right through the sound blockers, pulsing in their chests. The entire room was splattered in vomit, two officers were passed out, and another just lay on the floor sobbing.

Finn turned to Jannah. “Ben is mean.”

Jannah shook her head. “I already feel nauseous. Let’s get the hell out of here.”

They dodged puddles of sick and sped through that doorway, shutting it behind them. Silence once again, cold, empty. At the next door (and by this time Finn was getting a little concerned,) the message had an emoji with a snorkel and mask. “Get to high ground before opening this door.”

Finn scanned the wide end of the corridor. A long desk that could easily seat thirty people circled the perimeter. He shrugged and instructed the crew to climb up before he hit the infamous icon. The door slid open and a wave of water poured out, carrying screaming, flailing officers and Storm Troopers way down the corridor. Once the flood cleared, the group climbed down and stepped inside. Nothing but sparking systems and one soggy cat-like man shaking in horror.

At the next door, the message said, “Use the tube in your kit marked with an A. Thrust at high velocity at the ground but toward the opposite door. You may need two bottles.” A little cartoon Ben scrambled and fell on its face.

Finn opened the door to see officers and troopers splayed on floor. Upon seeing his group, the enemy tried to get up but found absolutely no purchase on the floor.

Finn thrust the chemical and waited until the wet areas on the floor turned blue, just as Ben had instructed. The group walked in a single file with no slipping while the enemy stared, incredulous and desperate.

“Please help us!” one officer cried. “I need to get to the bathroom, and I can’t get up. No one can get up. Please! I’m begging you!”

Finn sniffed. “Oh yeah? Next time don’t go trying to shoot up the galaxy.” He thrust another line of blue at the floor and exited that room.

At the next door, Jannah shook her head. “What are we in for now?”

“I’m afraid to find out. Message says, ‘If you haven’t seen _Gone Like the Starship_ , then put your earplugs back in and don’t look at the screen. If you have, then you know, you already know, and you can hate me for it later.’ What the hell is _Gone Like the Starship_?”

Jannah put her fist to her mouth. “Oh no…”

They opened the door to find officers sobbing and hugging one another. On the main screen, a gorgeous young man disappeared while his sobbing girl floated away into space, riding in an enclosure.

“THERE WAS ROOM IN THE ESCAPE POD!” an officer cried. “DAMN YOU, ROSE!”

A woman sobbed in the corner. “I’ll never let go, Jack. I’ll never let go!”

“Fuck this director!” another screamed. “Jack suffered so much, he was tortured and pushed to the Dark Side, and they don’t even get a happy ending? Where was the fun we were supposed to have? WHERE WAS THE FUN?!”

Finn and Jannah’s crew slowly and silently skirted around the perimeter of the room, letting its inhabitants weep and console one another. While down another quiet corridor, Jannah said, “Ben Solo is a special kind of evil.”

“I got to be honest. I’m kind of missing the porn. Ah, new message. ‘I hope everyone got some last night. I suggest holding your nose unless you want to be _really_ distracted.’ Huh, this ought to be good.”

The door opened to an immense room filled with Storm Troopers. A scent hit Finn at once and he felt his cheeks warm. The sound he heard from the speakers could not be denied, and when he looked up at the screens surrounding the room (probably originally used for endless propaganda,) he saw his wish had come true. Hot and hardcore, the porn filed in from multiple sources, picture in picture, every flavor imaginable. Storm Trooper helmets were off, hell, most of the armor was off and strewn everywhere while bodies in varying stages of disrobement writhed against one another.

Jannah touched her chest and whispered, “What is that smell?”

Finn rubbed his neck. “Ben pumped the place full of pheromones. He, um…” He cleared his throat and fanned himself. “…did say to hold our noses.”

Jannah tilted her head, smiling. “Can’t we just stay here? Just a little while?”

Finn trailed his eyes up and down her body while heavenly sounds from behind him made it really hard to think. He shook his head and cleared his throat again. “I’d love to, but—we need to get out of here. Now—oh crap, we’re losing our crew.”

Four of the archers already started kissing. Finn breathed through his mouth while he and Jannah shoved their crew through the room and out the opposite door. The cold, stale air in the next corridor was actually pleasant this time, helping to wash away the intoxication from before.

“Alright, map says we go this way, and the next message simply says, ‘Punch this guy.’” Finn shrugged and followed the route, coming to one final door. Finn signaled it to open, and inside the tiny room was a single systems operator. The man stared in shock, and Finn did as Ben instructed, slamming his fist into the guy’s face, knocking him out cold.

Janna dragged out the man while Finn filed into the tiny space. “Final message says, ‘Congratulations, you have reached the treasure! Wave your comm over the gold panel and you will become the admin for the entire system controlling the fleet. Seriously, they _still_ didn’t change the admin login credentials from default even after I wrecked the Destroyer. Idiots. Well, have fun. Off to kill Palpatine.’”

Jannah smirked. “That’s our Ben.”

Finn laughed. “That’s our Ben indeed.” He placed his wrist near the gold panel and waved it in circles. “Just be ready for anything. This is our best hope to win this battle, so we have to maintain control over it.”

Jannah aimed her tech-bow. “Don’t worry. We are expert marksmen, even riding on the backs of orbaks. We won’t let anyone pass.” She paused and frowned. “Can I ask you something? Why did one group get the sexy room while another got the loud noise that makes you puke?”

Finn pressed a few buttons, following Ben’s instructions for the controls, and pushed a lever forward. “Ben’s thinking is a mystery to all, but it seems the higher ranking officers got the worst treatment. For them, working here was a choice, unlike the Storm Troopers—Poe? It’s Finn, you reading me?”

“Loud and clear,” came the voice through his comm.

“Shields are officially down. Take them out.”

“Roger my friend. Let’s blast some Destroyers!”

#

Leia gripped the armrests in the seat behind Han as the Falcon lurched and sped through multiple enemy shots. “Han! I’ve never seen you fly like this before!”

“Yeah!” Han said, nodding vehemently while his wide eyes stared through the transparasteel windows. “It’s like everything is perfectly sharp and clear and I see everything before it happens and it’s like I’m invincible and the Falcon is just an extension of my own mind and this isn’t even reality, it’s like I’m mentally making it happen—”

“Damnit, what the hell are you on?”

Han panted as he gripped the controls. “I told Ben we should toast before we go and I tried to have my whiskey but he said oh no I have to try his Hyper-Fuel this time and we toasted and now I SEE THROUGH TIME!”

The Falcon dove beneath another shot and spun through a hail of plasma fire.

“Oh Han! That can’t be good for you!”

Han blasted through another impossible skirmish. “Neither is dying, but we ain’t doing that today! WOO!”

Leia gripped the armrests once more, watching her husband take her on the wildest ride of her life. “Han, if I didn’t need to be strapped in right now, what I would do to you would blind Ben for life if he caught us.”

Han shoved the controls and punched through another blast of fire. “Top left drawer, baby!”

“You’re damn right, top left drawer!”

#

Walking the cold, onyx halls of the Sith Temple, in a sick sense, felt like coming home again. Rey had stridden this path many times trying to find answers to her existence and solutions to her problems. When Palpatine was trying to form a dyad between her and Kylo, she’d spent more time here than she ever wanted. It was familiar, and after a while of working with a tall and thin but muscular teen with jet black hair, she supposed it almost felt like home.

Kylo had no idea what to make of her then. He snarled and screamed, saying he didn’t need to be paired up with anyone so weak. And then, as he lay on the ground after she kicked his ass, she saw something else in his eyes—admiration, a lost soul who had found a kindred spirit.

Rey had found him later, recovering not from the wounds she inflicted but the consequences for his failure to win a battle. Palpatine had struck him with Force-lightning, and while he was stunned, weakened, and in agony, the Praetorian guards beat the hell out of him. If she had witnessed it, they’d all be dead already. She only saw the aftermath and heard the explanation.

No one ever asked him what happened to him. No one ever cared. And when she tried to nurse his wounds, he jumped away from her, so unfamiliar to kindness or compassion that it terrified him. Not the guards, not the lightning, but kindness. She supposed that was the instant he fell for her.

And she did love him too, but certainly not in the way she fell for Ben. Even if Kylo was good looking (and would certainly grow into his looks as the years passed,) she just couldn’t love him romantically. Her heart needed Light as much as Kylo’s did. Neither of them could give that to one another, and Kylo only latched onto her to be close to someone who made him feel even slightly better.

Honestly, Kylo and Rey had always needed Ben.

Walking now, overshadowed by statues that rose into oblivion, eyed by guards who allowed their passage, she turned to the man next to her. Tall, determined, the criss-cross belts over his chest full of gadgets and concoctions, blue lightsaber waiting over his shoulder. His black locks bounced with his step, dark eyes ahead, ready for what was to come.

This plan had to work. Rey could not face a life that ended like her vision.

It was all so different already, and in some ways that made it worse. In her vision, she knew Ben but really didn’t _know_ him, loved him in some way but didn’t really _love_ him like she did now. In the vision, losing him ripped her heart and soul in two as she watched him fade into the Force, and that was when she barely knew him.

How would she handle seeing the same thing happen to the Ben she knew now?

No. This had to work. She’d sooner fall on her own lightsaber than see that horrifying image of her Ben disappearing from her life forever. If someone had put that scene in a movie, she would have punched the director and writer right in the face for forcing her to endure that.

The hallway opened to a vast expanse, the chanting hordes circling the inner sanctum of the Temple.

“It’s time,” she said, looking next to her.

He stared into the room, face unchanged. He rolled his jaw just a little, twitch flickering under his eye. His throat bobbed as he swallowed.

She grasped his upper arm, and his eyes flitted over to hers. “You ready?”

Those determined eyes softened, and maybe in there was a smile. The love in his heart drove everything he would do from this point on. He turned back toward the room and nodded, jaw set.

They stepped out into the center of the sanctum, lit in a cold, ominous glow by scattered light orbs and the flashing lighting spilling in from the open ceiling above. Onward as their boots echoed amongst the chants toward the machine at the head of the room next to the throne of the Sith.

A seat she had considered more than a few times. But it could never give her what Ben had given her. Not just himself, but a family, a real home, camaraderie, and laughter, so much laughter. She could rule the galaxy and never smile or live in the basement with Ben and have more than she ever thought she wanted.

That throne was nothing more than trash and could crumble with the rest of this shitheap.

The hideous creature that bore part of her genes grinned from beneath the hood of his black cloak. Milky eyes, jagged teeth, sagging skin—what hadn’t rotted and fallen off: he was a hanging bag of meat that smiled at her. The arm on the massive machine that kept him alive angled down so he could be near her level but still just above. Palpatine would always seat himself above.

“Ah, dear granddaughter, finally you return to me.”

Rey snorted and put her hand on her hip. “Don’t insult me by using that term. Knowing you’re a part of my lineage makes me want to puke.”

“Oh come now, my dear. It is a great honor to bear the name of Palpatine.”

Rey huffed. “The only last name I will ever use from this point forward is Solo.” She heard a scream of delight along her bond and tried not to smile.

“Ah yes, Ben Solo, my boy. You have finally accepted that your fate belongs with the Dark Side of the Force.”

Ben swallowed and blinked slowly. “What choice do I have?” He glanced at Rey. “I can’t save her without your help.”

“A wise decision. You will come to see there really was no choice. As heir to Vader, you were always meant to serve by my side.” He grinned with those blackened teeth. “Dear granddaughter, you have done well to bring him before me. For that you shall be rewarded.”

“Pfft, yeah right.” Rey cocked her head back. “You are the galaxy’s biggest troll, and I’m supposed to believe that you’ll give me what I want? No, we are going to iron out this deal in a way you don’t get to back out of.”

Palpatine tilted his head up, bearing the sagging folds on his neck. “Interesting. What is it you propose?”

Rey fought the light gnawing in her stomach. She couldn’t give her real thoughts away. “First of all, you don’t harm him. He stays with me. I want him and I want my health.”

Palpatine lifted a hand, the fingertips rotted right to the bones. “But what of the throne, my dear? Surely a galaxy to rule is more lucrative than a boy.”

Rey leaned forward. “Ben, and my health. We both know you’ll take the throne the second we give you the power of our dyad—” She felt something along her bond that stunned her and needed to not outwardly show it. “—and all I want is Ben and a lifetime to enjoy him. We are otherwise at your service, to—”

Echoing through the sanctum, she heard a deep, metalized voice. “SHIIIIIIIIT!”

From one side of the Temple, Darth Vader, cape billowing, swung from a rope across the vast expanse and toward Palpatine’s life support system. The black-clad figure leapt off the rope, scrambled in the air, and fell with a crash right into the depth of the system. “FUCK!”

Rey swallowed but kept her gaze forward.

Palpatine tilted his head. “Did…Darth Vader just swing through here screaming?”

Rey shrugged. “I…didn’t see anything. Ben?”

The dark-haired man next to her shook his head. “No, not at all. Perhaps you were hallucinating.”

“Guards!” Palpatine called. “See what has fallen back there.”

Rey tried to hold herself still as the red-armored guards charged behind Palpatine’s machine. She heard the hum of a lit lightsaber and saw the ominous red of its cast light flashing amidst all the arms, tubes, and equipment.

That metalized voice accompanied the crashing of battle. “Come on! I wasn’t ready—damnit, that’s too close! Quit it!”

Rey turned and looked at the man standing next to her. It was eerie to see such a smooth face where once a scar had cut across him. Ben’s theatrical makeup kit was superb.

Kylo looked back at her, eye twitching, followed by his brow.

They had to keep up the ruse, keep buying Ben time. They knew they couldn’t confront Palpatine head on; he would be too powerful. Ben had to sabotage the life-support machine, and this sudden deviation from the plan might put that in jeopardy.

Rey waved off the interference. “Probably some Resistance agent trying to infiltrate. They’re all over out there, trying to take down the fleet as we speak. All the more reason we have to settle this and now. Once that fleet deploys, the galaxy will be ours, so…”

#

In all of Ben’s planning, this was the one thing he hadn’t counted on, a simple math formula that even their practice runs didn’t account for: height + motion = terrifying!

He was supposed to use the Force to guide the swing on the rope. He only had to get from one giant statue to the other on the opposite side. No one should have seen him, and he sure as hell wasn’t supposed to swing that low. It would have been a perimeter swing, arcing around the round temple ceiling and reaching that statue above the machinery. The plan was perfect.

Until he looked down and couldn’t breathe. His Darth Vader helmet sounded like the real thing as he hyperventilated inside of it. All that panic, yet knowing what he had to do, he forced himself off that statue and forgot to use the Force.

All he could do was hold on for dear life as the floor and world spun toward him.

He didn’t mean to scream but couldn’t help it. Oh this was so bad. The plan was already falling apart because of his fears. Ben could hear his father in his head already: _Damnit boy! Can’t you get one thing right without pissing your pants?!_

Falling into the machinery hurt, but only from his own armor hitting his skin. The polymer Darth Vader outfit, with the extra plating he had molded, held up against the jagged and sharp edges that would otherwise have severely injured him. So far, so good.

Ben pushed himself out of a tight space between the machinery and came face to face with the biggest, juiciest, hairiest, death-hell-nope-fuck-this-shit spider he had ever seen, web so thick and so EVERYWHERE.

He sucked in a breath to scream and realized he shouldn’t. _They’re in my hair! They’re in my hair!_ He batted at his head and realized he was still wearing the helmet. _Oh thank the stars!_ No spiders could possibly get in his hair. Good. Gooood…

But this sucker had to go. He shook his fist at it, but that did nothing. He blew as hard as he could and only made another iconic Darth Vader noise. Out of options and needing to get out of this spot and do his job, he could think of only one thing to do. After verifying his hand was gloved and armored, he thrust forth and punched the spider. The impact of its thick form made him nearly barf into his helmet, but he swallowed it back down. The spider swung forward, then came right back toward his face. Primal fear, Ben thrust out with the Force, not even realizing he was doing so, and blasted the entire web against the wall, spider and all.

Oh good. Yeah. That was a good idea. He should have tried that first.

Ben scrambled down so he could hack into the controls of the machine. As he eyed the system, sweat beaded on his brow. This wasn’t like the controls inside Exegol or the Destroyer. It was more reminiscent of the Wayfinder. Point being, it was unfamiliar. This would take time.

He pried off a panel and pressed his tester against the board inside. What lunatic _built_ this?! He had to go old school on this sucker.

The stomping of feet grew louder, and he knew he was in for some shit. No time to waste, he had to do anything at this point. He pulled out the wires from his control unit and linked the ends to the relay unit inside the machine. Just as he raised his snips to bypass the main controls, something whacked into his shoulder, knocking him into the other side of the machine.

He looked over and saw a guard in red armor, a plasma-infused pole-blade at the ready. If not for the polymer, Ben would have been the next generation of Skywalkers with one arm. The guard raised the weapon, and instinct thankfully took over. Ben yanked the cross-hilt saber from his belt and ignited, catching the swing and holding it with the cross-brace.

The guard jolted. “Kylo?!”

“No!” Ben said, the voice modulator working in perfect tone. “I am your father—I mean Darth Vader!”

With a growl, the guard drew back and swung once more. Ben just barely ducked out of the way. “Come on!” He deflected the next two strikes by a slim margin. “I wasn’t ready—” That one skirted way too close to his face. “—damnit, that’s too close! Quit it!”

This guy just wouldn’t stop! And he was fast. The modded armor of the Vader costume would withstand most blows, but if that guy slipped in through one of the joints, Ben was doomed.

He wanted to run for his life, but he had to stay _there_ where he could hack the control. And he was afraid to use too much of the Force this close to Palpatine and give away himself and Kylo. He had no choice. He had to fight.

As he continued to block strikes, he noticed a pattern. Kylo fought the same way—of course! Who else would have taught him but these assholes? And he had fought Kylo before…

He blocked until he could finally see the pattern. The last strike he didn’t block, taking the brunt of that swing on his left arm. It knocked him aside and bruised him good, but it opened up his enemy. Ben ducked under and punched a sticky cone onto the guard’s stomach. When he yanked out the attached string, fiery sparks exploded out of the cone, skating harmlessly against his Vader polymer, and propelled the guard across the sanctum with an unceremonious crash.

Ben stroked the chin of the Vader helmet. _Hm, I should add more colors to that mix. If you’re going to shoot your enemy across the room, it should look like a fireworks spectacular. No time for that now._

Ben returned to the control unit and snipped the master wires, giving himself control over the life-support machine. His screen projection lit up in all kinds of Sith runes. _Oh crap._ That was one thing he wasn’t about to learn in Uncle Luke’s Jedi Temple.

By the process of deduction, he had to figure out which was the off button or zap button or something that would fry the old geezer. Damn, none of this made sense!

He didn’t want to have to blow the whole damn thing up, too much risk for himself and the rest of the trio, but it was looking like it may have to go that way.

A singing of metal and Ben ducked out of the way just in time before another blade cut through where he had just been standing—and right into his hacking control unit!

“Oh you incredible crotch-goblin!” Ben drew up his lightsaber once more, blocked a strike, threw off another, and dove out of the last one. As he hit the ground, he jammed his hand into his pouch and pulled out a clear, round ball with red and green balls inside. The guard’s jagged blade swung down. Ben deflected it with the lightsaber and in the same motion flung the ball at the guard’s chest. It exploded into a poofy, pink goo. The guard stared down at himself for a moment before Ben flung him on the Force high up against the wall. And there he stuck. Sure, the guard struggled and flailed. But he wasn’t coming down. He was never coming down.

Well, with that one out of the way, he turned to the sparking hacker unit. Damn! Alright, Plan B. He dipped into another compartment on his cosplay and pulled out a charger. Maybe he could blow the system up from the inside and not endanger himself or Rey and Kylo. His fingers a blur, he twisted jumper wires into the wrong ends, tied one off onto the main control unit of the life support system, and finally touched the other wire to a sensitive component.

A spark of bright white nearly blinded him (thankfully the helmet visor was tinted) and a loud pop told him he did something good. It was the sound after that gripped him.

Heavy machinery, a high whine. Ben turned just in time to see the arm holding Palpatine jerk its entire length upwards. A cloaked sack of rotting flesh flew through the air, high and wide. Rey and Kylo watched, their heads turned up, as Palpatine soared across the Temple and slammed with a splat on the ground.

Ben dropped his jaw. “Oh that will do it!”

The temple was in an uproar. The hum of lightsabers flashed into life, blue and yellow swinging against the guards and various cultists. Palpatine was flat on the floor (good!) but they had to make sure he was dead.

_Is he gone?_ Ben sent to Rey.

_I don’t know. I’m trying to keep everyone away from him. If he’s still alive, I don’t want them helping him._

_Okay, I’ll be right there—ah shit, better give me a minute._ Ben eyed the five guards charging at him. _Oh Kylo, I totally should have trained more yesterday._

_YES YOU SHOULD HAVE!_ came his brother’s response.

Ben dodged the first strikes and swung that red lightsaber with everything he had in him. He couldn’t believe how responsive that weapon was, as if it had its own consciousness and agenda, helping him to fight, delighting in the battle. It seemed absurd, but the more he fought, the better he got. And with Palpatine now a pancake, Ben had no problem flinging the guards out of his way, against the wall, or against each other’s weapons.

When he could, he’d check on the other two, though he knew he didn’t have to. They cut through hordes of enemies: Rey at her finest, vicious, fast, and agile; Kylo a monster on the side of good, merciless and driven, the blue lightsaber twirling like it weighed nothing. They were making their way toward Palpatine, slicing and shooting through anyone that came near.

Once they got close to him, he hoped Rey and Kylo would enjoy delivering any final blow if needed. That jerk deserved it.

Ben glued one more guard to the wall and thrust one of those slippery pellets onto the ground, making the last few scramble and fall into a heap. Well, they’d be stuck there a while, perfect, because—

“ _TREACHEROUS GIRL-CHILD!_ ” The voice was hissing and sinister, and Ben’s stomach sunk. Then he felt something through his bond that stopped his heart.

He whipped around to see Rey and Kylo, only ten feet from Palpatine, hoisted into the air, white light sucking out of them and into the bloodied monster with its hand out.

“Stand together, DIE TOGETHER!”

NO! This was the one thing that absolutely could not happen! Ben ran with everything he had in him, drew his arm back and thrust it forward with the epitome of his power. Palpatine blasted across the temple. Ben clenched his fist and shoved downward to bash that fucker right into the ground.

Rey and Kylo fell to the floor, and Ben skidded beside them.

“Rey?! Kylo?!”

Rey sat up with a growl and massaged her temples. “That asshole.”

“Oh fuck, Rey, are you okay? How much did he take?”

She pushed to her feet, a little unsteady. “I can still kick his ass.” Kylo snarled as he rose after her, but even he teetered and pressed his palm against his head.

Ben placed his hands against their chests and breathed, letting his Force flow into them.

“Ben don’t!” Rey said, trying to get away, but he held her in place with his energy.

“I’m not wounded, I’m fine. I can spare it.”

“That’s enough! Ben, you have to get away from me before he figures out what’s going on. If he gets a hold of the two of us…” She just shook her head.

A flash of jagged light had them all in a defensive posture, ready for what was to come. Palpatine stood on his own, hands sparkling with Force lightning.

“You are no DARTH VADER!” Palpatine laughed as the flashing arcs cast out toward them. Then the wicked smile died on his lips. He thrust harder, growing more and more frustrated while Ben, Rey, and Kylo just stood there, taking the blast of lightning, their arms up to shield their faces. Finally, Palpatine stopped and looked at his hands, baffled.

Kylo and Rey thrust out their chests. “TOR-FLEX!”

Ben stuck up his finger. “And Vader polymer! Because I’m not actually wearing Tor-Flex, fun fact—”

“Not now!“ Rey said between her teeth.

“Palpatine’s strong now,” Kylo said. “We have to switch plans. You two have to do your dyad thing to defeat him. I’ll attack him and buy you time.”

“Kylo, you can’t possibly—”

“We have to! This is it!” He activated the blue lightsaber once more. “We do this now or the galaxy is doomed.” He roared into battle, charging at Palpatine.

Ben leaned in toward Rey. “Do I look that cool when I wear that outfit? Because he looks really—”

“Ben!” Rey hissed.

“Right.” He took a breath, pulled off his gloves, and held out his hands. “It’s time for us to shine.”

Rey nodded once and grasped his hands. Time for the true dyad to fulfill its destiny.

A giant object blasted into them and ripped their hands from one another. Ben fell to the ground and watched his brother roll to a stop. Palpatine had thrown Kylo right into them. Kylo pushed himself up and growled at their nemesis, blood staining his mouth. He charged forward again and was hurled flat to the ground. This time, he didn’t move.

“KYLO!” Ben cried and then realized his mistake too late. His body wrenched into the air, unable to move, and he saw that Rey was up there with him. _Oh no no no SHIT!_ This was bad. This was so bad. This was exactly what needed to NOT happen!

Palpatine crept closer, his eyes glowing yellow. “You thought you were so clever.”

Ben’s helmet yanked off of his head. “OW! My ears—hey, don’t fuck that up! I need that for Galacticon!”

Palpatine grinned. “Oh my boy, you won’t have a need for anything anymore, BEN SOLO!”

Ben caught Rey’s eyes and his heart instantly broke. She was scared, so damn scared. Not for herself, no, she would never hold that fear for herself. It was for him.

The vision was too close to becoming a reality.

_Ben…FIGHT!_

Yes, hadn’t he done it before? When Kylo held him like this? He flashed her a look of agreement and turned his eyes back to their tormentor. With all the power he had in him, he resisted the hold. By the grunts beside him, Rey was doing the same.

Palpatine snickered. “Such fight in the two of you! You really should have chosen to serve me. Such power will be a waste when I drain you both!”

Ben growled as he pushed with all his might against the hold. Palpatine’s eyes narrowed. Yes! Ben was finally doing something!

Then a flash of glowing yellow eyes and Ben cried out as the hold grew infinitely stronger, strangling his entire body. Rey screamed beside him, and he could have punched himself a thousand times for fucking up the plan so damn much!

Palpatine grinned. “A true dyad in the Force, a power like life itself. The two now restore the one TRUE EMPEROR!”

Ben braced, but he had to fight! He couldn’t let Palpatine drain Rey! He pushed with everything in him, around him, his entire lineage, every force in the universe, whatever he could muster.

His energy siphoned right out of his chest, stealing his breath along with it. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the light funneling out of Rey.

Ben’s worst nightmare was coming true, and no matter how hard he fought, he couldn’t break out of it. The sickening feeling turned his body into a weak, shaking mess, but all he could think about was Rey.

Without the Force flowing at full inside of her…

His girl…his beautiful girl…

Memories of her screaming in his arms…her skin breaking at the touch…

“ _REYYYYYY!_ ” he screamed through his teeth. He drew upon the Force and pushed it out to her, not sure if it would work, not sure if it was doing anything, but he had to keep her energized! He couldn’t let that horrible vision come to pass.

And then the draining stopped.

Kylo screamed as he raced forward, lightsaber ready to slice through the would-be emperor. It was enough to distract Palpatine, but he merely yanked Kylo up on the Force and held him there.

“Kylo Ren,” Palpatine drawled as the young man struggled in the grasp, “you are and have always been a waste of Force and flesh.”

Ben’s blood boiled, and he felt a new flood of power course through him, one he would unleash on Palpatine if he could muster enough.

“As once I fell, SO SHALL YOU!”

Palpatine threw Kylo up into the air toward the pit at the far end of the sanctum.

This was the moment. Their final chance.

_NOW!_ Ben screamed in his mind. In unison with Rey, he said, “Pro command 100! Wing command five!”

Fire burst out of his boot rockets and Rey’s while, “I need a hero!” sang from the speakers on their comms. This caught Palpatine’s attention, which is exactly what they needed. Kylo, still sailing toward the pit, thrust his hand down with all his might before falling out of sight.

The thick, gray ball he heaved slammed into the ground, and if there ever was a test of weaponry, this was it. On that first day, when Ben tested it on the worms, he never imagined the scale he’d have to contend with one day.

That day was now.

The gray ball burst into foam that expanded at lightning speed across the ground. It poured up Palpatine’s back, and the impact was instantaneous. His hold on them disappeared and their boot rockets sailed them high above the freeze foam that spread across the entire floor of the sanctum. Cultists ran for their lives, but to no avail. It blasted up the rows of seats into the spectators, out of the doors and up the walls.

Only Rey and Ben remained safe, flying above the foamy mayhem, their comms singing about holding out for a hero till the end of the night.

Ben could barely breathe he was in such shock from it all, never mind seeing his grand experiment just snuff out hundreds of lives (albeit shitty ones) in one instantaneous blast. He forced his mouth to work. “You okay?”

Rey shivered beside him, staring in awe at the ground beneath them. “Yeah. I think so. A little weak, but I’ll survive. When, um…when is it safe to go down?”

“It will break down soon. Once it’s a blue liquid, it’s inert.” He caught her eyes, feeling like he just remembered how to breathe again. “I’m so sorry. I screwed everything up from the beginning.”

“Oh Ben…” She shook her head and laughed. “It definitely didn’t go off without a hitch, but you didn’t screw up. We’re here, and as long as he’s dead, that’s all that matters.” She broke into full laughter. “Darth Vader sailing through the temple was the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life. Did the suits really record all this? I mean, this is a classic!”

Ben finally broke into a nervous smile. He wouldn’t be able to laugh until he was sure Palpatine was dust. “I made sure all the cameras worked on our outfits. I’m telling you, Marketing will never top this footage to show the efficiency of my products.” He nodded toward the ground. “It’s fading. Almost done.”

The foam sizzled, broke apart, and finally settled into that blue liquid.

Ben heaved in a breath. Time for the truth. “Pro command fifty.” Rey echoed the command, and their bodies slowly lowered to the ground. Ben continued to call commands until finally their feet hit the wet floor, music snuffing out with the rockets. Before them stood the haggard form of Palpatine in an ashy blue. Ben looked to Rey, and she nodded before igniting her lightsaber. She stepped forward and pressed the tip into her grandfather’s face. The frozen body broke into dust and crumbled to the ground, dissolving into the blue liquid.

All around them, the cultists, the guards, all were that frozen ash, and all it would take was a gust of wind to scatter them for good.

Rey let out a screaming cry of triumph and relief. Sobbing, laughing, she deactivated her lightsaber and leapt into Ben’s arms. It was over. Finally over.

“REY!” he cried and held her so tightly, never wanting to let go. It was done! No more creepy voices in his head, no taking over the galaxy, no awful vision where they had to die to defeat him. They were together, they were safe, and he was GONE!

Their life together could finally begin!

Ben kissed her so deeply as if he could merge with her by that alone. And didn’t he feel it? Dyad as one, together, nothing could ever tear them apart.

Energy flowed through them, from him into her in their perfect kiss. Her grip around him strengthened, the effects of the draining disappearing just like the dust of Palpatine.

Ben set her down and just admired her exquisite beauty, so tough and strong yet so delicate and beautiful. He belonged to her, and she to him. This was a far better ending than that shitty vision. If he had been forced to watch that ending on a Galaxy Wars movie, he would have boycotted the entire franchise.

Rey sighed and smiled. “We better go check on Kylo.”

Ben nodded. “He saved us when we needed him the most. He’s our hero.”

Rey laughed. “He’ll have such a hard time wrapping his mind around that—”

A gust of energy thrust him backwards and onto the ground. Ben scrambled to his feet and saw Rey leaping to hers, having also been tossed by this sudden blast. Ominous and red, a pale mirage in the darkened temple, sharp contrast to all the blue, Palpatine’s disembodied face glared with jagged teeth and glowing yellow eyes.

The war wasn’t over.

_Ben in his Vader cosplay, photo manip by Spirit's Paintbrush www.spiritspaintbrush.com and @land_a_joy on Twitter_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I...did I just leave you on a cliffhanger? *runs out the door, gets into car, screeches away*
> 
> Okay so here's why. First, I had thought to divide this into 3 chapters but it just wasn't going to work out that way and not be stupid. So I wound up with two big chapters. This week was crazier than I planned, and I wanted to write most of the second half before I posted this one. Also, I wanted to post this one already since you have all been patiently waiting for a full week now. I only have one last short scene to write to finish the next chapter, then a day or two of edits and I shall post, promise! 
> 
> Exactly how many potshots did I take at TROS? Even I lost count. I'll be honest, I liked the movie up until they took my Benny Ben Ben away, so the movie pretty much ends right at the smile. I can't NOT watch it because he's just so damn pretty, but I can take plenty of potshots at it in my fic! 
> 
> As for Baby Shark, I asked my son what was the most annoying thing he could think of, and that was his answer, so that's why it made it in the fic LOL! 
> 
> The movie reference was supposed to be a little Titanic and a little TROS, but I couldn't come up with a decent title to match.
> 
> This fic has gotten HUGE. I had no idea I had written so much or that it had gotten this long. Thank you for all that have hung in there with me. But I tell you, the most satisfying moment was writing Ben swinging through the Temple dressed as Darth Vader. I have been wanting to write that scene since the beginning, the complete absurdity of it and Rey and Kylo trying to keep a straight face. And the plain absurdity alone of fighting the most dangerous man in the galaxy in a cosplay. See? There was a reason Ben made it out of that special polymer, hee hee!
> 
> PS I purposely made there be a response to Leia's call to action, another dig at how things went down. No one had responded to Leia but they respond to Lando? Well, not this time. When Leia calls you to action, you show the hell up. Right Luke?
> 
> Stay tuned for more! I love your comments and promise to have the next chapter to you soon! Follow me on Twitter @shannon_enloe


	18. Seriously, Palpatine's a Jerk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be strong, Ben! You can do this!  
> In the final battle, Ben faces a weakness he never expected. It will take something extra special to set him back on the right path.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is another one of my infamous double-chapters, meaning I had to split the giant one into two, so I'll be dropping Chapter 19 shortly after posting this one. 
> 
> I've tried to steer away from anything too dark or graphic in this fic, but just an FYI, one character's bad childhood memories are going to come up, and while I've tried not to make them too graphic, it could be disturbing to really sensitive readers. If you want to avoid it, it starts with "That’s when the flood pelted his mind," and ends by "Palpatine was so close now, hand out, reaching for him. "
> 
> And one more reminder, stuff will get intense and scary here (it IS the final battle scene) but remember, only the really bad bad guys go squish in this fic.
> 
> Onward to the battle!

Ben rushed toward Rey, both of the same mind, but a wall of energy pushed him back, keeping them apart. He mustered the entirety of Force within him and strained against the field that kept him from her. His feet only slid back further.

“Stupid boy,” Palpatine intoned. “Did you think it would be so easy? I am unlimited POWER!”

“Oh yeah?” Ben said, shaking as he pushed his mind, body, and powers against this perpetual block. “Didn’t seem so unlimited before.”

“Freed of that frail body, I have become more powerful than you can ever imagine.”

“Then…why’d you bother with those fucked up bodies in the first place? Seems like a plot-hole in a badly thought-out movie.”

“You are as arrogant as your grandfather and just as stupid. This surge of power won’t last, but I won’t need it to. I have a perfectly good body to inhabit right here.”

Ben whipped his head toward Rey. Palpatine’s granddaughter. His bloodline.

Rey snorted. “You can just fuck right off, Grandpa. I’ll blow my own head off before I let you in here.”

Palpatine snickered. “Dearest granddaughter, you are a failure like your father and just as useless.”

Ben clenched his teeth. “Don’t you FUCKING talk to her like that!”

Palpatine laughed in such a cold and acidic manner. “Such passion! Such fight! So perfect.”

Rey narrowed her eyes, and Ben felt her nerves dance through their bond.

“Oh my dear granddaughter, I have someone just as powerful that, unlike you, is healthy, strong, and riddled with intelligence.”

Rey’s wide eyes snapped to Ben, and he knew he was in trouble. Palpatine turned his grinning gaze to him and drew forward.

“NOOO!” Rey screamed, and Ben could sense the power surging through her, the protective fire of her heart, the powerful warrior who would never let harm come to the one she loved. Her feet inched forward, pushing against Palpatine’s endless blast. She loved Ben so much as to give everything to protect him.

And he knew he had to stop her.

“REY NO!” Ben strained against the energy instead. Let him give it all. He could survive it—she couldn’t. Damn, if only they could just touch hands, their dyad would charge up that power like the last time and they’d destroy him.

“Silly boy,” Palpatine said, “that is exactly why I shall keep you apart until my work is done. You are completely incapable of keeping me out of your head, and I will see all your moves before you make them. Checkmate.”

Oh bullshit. No one was beating him at holo-chess, especially not this asshole. Ben flooded his mind with his favorite calculations at difficulty levels that would stump his colleagues.

“You’re not getting into me!” Ben growled with a sinister grin. “You can’t HANDLE being in me! _I_ can barely handle being in me!”

Palpatine’s smile faded. “So much Light in you for being the heir of Vader. And so strong for being so untrained.” The sadistic smile returned. “But you have a weakness that not even your precious coping skills can save you from.”

“He won’t hurt me!” Rey called. “Don’t give in, Ben! He knows there’s nothing he can do to me that you need to protect me from. Just keep being that strong self. You can do this, Ben! Keep him out and come to me!”

Ben intended to do just that. He had to trust Rey, trust her strength. Hell, she had always _been_ his strength. He just wished he could keep her from using so much energy. Well, that was one part he could do. _He_ just had to get to _her_ , and they would win.

Palpatine looked down on Ben, his face eerily unreadable. “Oh dear granddaughter, what makes you assume that _you_ are his weakness?”

Confusion made Ben’s mind blank out for just a second when a vision blasted into his head. A little boy. Black hair, dark brown eyes. An innocent, cherubic, scarred face among a black-clad mob.

His eyes are wide and wary, so incredibly anxious. He startles at every movement. Sound and brightness are too much for his senses, the perpetual storms of Exegol making him jump with every thunderclap and cringe at every flash.

Ben knows this is Kylo; the scar is a dead giveaway. But what Ben didn’t know before and now realizes is that Kylo is just like him. Ben is looking at himself as a small child. The reactions, the sensitivities, even the hands drawing up to his chest, coiling in on himself in fear. Kylo started out no different from him.

And what did Kylo become?

That’s when the flood pelted his mind, memories all belonging to Palpatine, of a young Kylo’s “training” in the Dark Side of the Force. That tiny child is pummeled with Force-lightning, and when he cries, he’s zapped again. He pleads to his caregiver, a giant malformed being Ben assumes is Snoke, and is struck for being a coward. Blood and the sting of betrayal on a trusting boy’s face.

Ben felt it, surging through him as he watched his brother suffer. Anger, pure unadulterated anger.

A tiny child grows and learns not to cry. He learns not to smile. There is no reward for good work, only torture for failure. A skinny boy shakes as he begs for food and is told he needs to kill if he wants to earn it. A matter of survival, he screams as he jams an oversized lightsaber into a man, only to be thrown a morsel that looks days past its prime.

While Ben was feasting on Leia’s delicious meals and treated to gifts of chemistry kits and toolsets, his brother was forced to murder just to eat. While Ben went to school and overwhelmed his teachers, his brother was beaten for showing any emotion but anger. While Ben curled up in his mother’s arms and watched movies, Kylo was tormented until he no longer reacted, no longer felt, no longer was any version of himself.

Under Palpatine’s orders, and by his hand.

Anger fueled into rage, and all Ben could think about was wrapping his hands around that son of a bitch’s throat and squeezing, delighting in the gasping cries as he snapped the bones in Palpatine’s neck. The old bastard may not have had a body anymore, but Ben would still make that fucking monster suffer! Just like Palpatine made Kylo suffer, Ben would give him hell to pay for what he’d done!

Ben raised his hand toward Palpatine and screamed with everything in him, forcing out his energy in a deadly torrent of wrath.

“BEN!” Rey screamed. “NO! STOP!”

Didn’t she understand? Of course not. She didn’t see, and he couldn’t stop seeing it. The memories kept flooding his mind. His helpless brother never receiving an ounce of comfort, not a kiss, not a hug, barely even a touch. Left cold and alone in a dank cell when he was ill. Wounds festering and ignored. _Medicine is for the weak!_ And Kylo was not allowed to be weak. Ever. Because of this son of a bitch. Because of this fucking piece of shit!

Ben thrust out again with another scream of rage, and Palpatine drew near, yes! _Perfect! Come closer, you fucker!_ Ben pulled at him, drawing him closer, so he really could get his hands around the creature’s proverbial neck.

“BEN STOP IT!” Rey screamed. “Don’t give in to the Darkness! That’s how he’ll get into you! That’s his way in!”

Didn’t she understand? This wasn’t Darkness! Palpatine _deserved_ vengeance for all he had done. He and his cohorts tortured a little boy into complete madness! They destroyed his humanity! And now Palpatine would pay the ultimate price!

“BEN PLEEEEASE! Your eyes are yellow! Ben, please focus on me! Focus on who you are!”

Who he is? It meant nothing now that he knew the truth. He had been weak for far too long, and because of it, Palpatine was allowed to continue his rampage of hell. If he had been stronger, if he had not been _kept_ from his powers, he could have saved Kylo long ago and destroyed this son of a bitch once and for all!

Well now was his chance! Palpatine would die in a rain of fire if it took every ounce of Force in Ben to do it!

He could feel Rey pushing through their bond. Images flashing alongside the ones from Palpatine. Math problems. Fluorescent minerals. Chemical chains. Things Rey remembered from his work.

His heart softened. This is who he was, not the machine of rage from before—

Now an image of Kylo chained, enduring such horrific torture he screamed until his voice gave out. He could still feel Rey trying to get through, but Ben’s instincts, his deep desire to protect the ones he loved, it overwhelmed his senses, and the magma came flooding back into him.

Palpatine was so close now, hand out, reaching for him. Good. Let him come. Ben wanted to stare right in his face when he slaughtered the old bastard. Ben wanted to watch him die once and for all—no! Suffer! Ben had to take his time, make him scream just as much as his baby brother.

Ben growled as he drew from his Darkness like never before.

“Yes!” Palpatine said in that scummy, slithering way of his. “Give in to your anger. Your anger gives you power! Strike me down, Ben Solo. Make me suffer for torturing your waste of flesh brother!”

Oh yeah.

He would.

Ben reared his hand back to thrust out when he felt something upon his head. Soft. Warm. Tender strokes from delicate fingers. He closed his eyes for a moment, that soothing delight dropping those intense emotions right into the ground, calming his fury, calming everything.

He opened his eyes again and caught Rey’s gaze. Tears in her eyes but smiling, loving him so much, afraid for him. Her fingers moved and he could feel it. She was pushing through their dyad bond, reaching through and physically touching him. Almost like passing pillowcases or cans, but this time it was her fingers.

Despite the wall of energy keeping them apart, she still reached him. To save him from Palpatine, from the Dark Side, and from himself. She loved him so much, and he remembered that was his greatest strength.

And wasn’t it Kylo’s too? To have endured all that, his mind and heart mutilated, but he still had the comprehension of love to give his life to save Rey. Kylo, who in such a short time learned to smile, learned to trust, learned to open himself to the good in life. What Ben just saw could easily have ruined anyone for good. But Kylo was really no different from Ben, as was clear from the beginning. Ben’s love saved Kylo, and it would keep saving him from now on.

Ben couldn’t take that away from his brother. He couldn’t give in to the monster that tormented the young man, _become_ that monster.

If Rey hadn’t reached him across the bond…

Reached him…

His eyes lit up as it all dawned on him.

Even though Palpatine hammered at him with endless horrific images, Ben knew he had to love. Rey had sent hers, her loving comfort in his time of need. His Darkness drew her Light. And now, through their bond, he would send his Light to her Darkness.

_We’re not apart, Rey. This is an illusion. We will never be apart, even if we were across the galaxy. Touch my hands and let me share my Light with you as you did for me._

Through Palpatine’s translucent image before him, he could see her face brighten as she realized it too. Her hands reached out, fingers grasping. He did the same and felt her tiny hands in his giant palms, even if they were nowhere near one another.

She had saved him, and he flooded her with his deepest gratitude and love while she drained the anger and hatred. And he felt her Light flash back to him that he drew it into his Darkness. One into the other, the Light softening the Dark, the Dark driving the Light, from one hand to the other, one person to the other. Dyad as one, energy flowing perpetually in a vortex of darkness and light.

And trapped in the middle, confused and concerned, was Palpatine.

From Rey’s hands to Ben’s, the circling Darkness and Light formed a barrier that Palpatine tried to escape. He hissed as the pure flow of the Force ripped through him, leaving a glowing ember where it had torn off a portion of his soul. With a scream of rage and fury (and most certainly fear) Palpatine struck out at them with all of his energy. Force lightning glittered inside the vortex, but it could not escape, nor could it hurt Ben or Rey. The energy they generated, a power like life itself, grew in intensity.

If Ben had weakened himself by blasting out at his enemy, he did not feel it now. His entire being just charged with the energy of creation. And in that state of oneness with Rey, he could feel it in her, too.

The walls of the vortex thickened, coalescing in the center, gathering around Palpatine and wrapping itself around him despite his best efforts to fight it. This was a power beyond anything the old Sith could have ever touched. This was the raw energy of the universe itself, and it didn’t care about Darkness or Light, Siths or Jedis. It was both destroyer and creator, and as a metaphorical universe birthed within their grasp, it burned out and replaced the corrupt existence inside.

It was so much stronger than the last time they had joined like this, now that Ben was at his full power. If last time was magical, this was transcendent.

Ben couldn’t help but laugh at the sheer delight of it all. All the secrets of the universe that he had sought all his life flowed through him, through them, circling in this little sphere, this created universe, a vortex of perpetual Darkness and Light spinning into infinity. He could see the mathematical formulas of it all coursing through his head, sheer perfection, where everything fit and made sense.

It was sensational, indescribable, a glory he could never imagine or explain. He could only feel and maybe, just maybe, the math would stay with him when it was all over. Just maybe he could detail it in sheer numerical poetry.

Like two magnetic poles, they mastered the universe in their hands and trapping the evil that would corrupt and bring down this perfection of exquisite balance in the universe.

By the look on Rey’s face, she felt it too. He could feel her thoughts as part of his own. She didn’t see it like he did. In her vision, there was so much beauty, fire and light, the planets, the moons, the stars, flowers and stones, life and death, the pure tangible cosmos while his was the theory beneath it all.

Together they made a microcosm of the universe itself.

A place where a corrupt piece of garbage like Palpatine would not survive.

They could feel the moment Palpatine was vanquished, because the error, the anomaly, the wrongness in their perfection finally fizzled into nothingness. It was done. They could release this mini universe back into the larger one at whole. The vortex slowed as they drew it back down, bringing the Darkness and the Light back into themselves. The light in the center faded until it was gone.

Silence. Purity. Peace.

And here there was no sacrifice. No death for the heroes that made it happen. The Force had chosen them as their champions and promised glory if they fulfilled their duty. And glory was theirs, for at the end of it, standing across from one another, they still had each other. Two halves of a whole. Two that made one.

They ran and leapt into each other’s arms with a kiss to end all kisses, their merging unity a celebration against the horrors that were and the horrors that could have come to pass. They had beaten the odds, beaten the visions, and come out on top.

With each other.

Love won the day. And made them both stronger than they had ever been when apart.

Ben stared at her in his arms, smiling, basking in the perfection of their bond. “Rey…I love you so much I can’t even comprehend it.”

“And I love you, beyond this universe and any others.”

He sunk his fingers into her hair, adoring the endless beauty before him. “Rey, you saved me out there. Not just my life, but my entire existence.” He shook his head. “I could never have been strong enough without you.”

She sunk her fingers into his hair in the way that made him melt. “And I wouldn’t have had the heart to stand against him without you. Together, we’re perfection.”

Ben scooped her into his arms and kissed her one more time, diving once again into the bliss of their union, the essence of her being, and the joy of their eternal love. Her fingers curled through his hair while his hands sunk into the softness of her body. He treasured her with the depth of his soul, and of all the gifts he could ever have been given, walking out of this temple with the love of his life by his side would always be the best one.

He set her down and tilted his head toward the exit. “Want to get the hell out of here?”

“Badly.”

He closed his eyes. _Kylo, we did it. He’s gone for good. You okay?_

No response.

Ben’s throat ran dry. _Kylo, if you can sense me, please answer me!_

Nothing.

Ben felt everything inside of him seize in icy horror at once. He could barely speak as he turned to Rey. “Kylo? Can you…?”

Rey closed her eyes, and when they sprung open, the fear and pain in them was too much to bear. Without a word, they charged across the blue-stained ground, racing toward the pit.

Ben dove to the ground by its edge and stared down into the seemingly endless chasm. “Kylo?! KYLO!? KYLO PLEEEEASE!”

Only his echo responded.

Those horrible images flooded his mind once more alongside the recent ones of Kylo smiling, asking to go to Galacticon, laughing and enjoying Mom’s cooking, even enjoying Dad’s cooking, playing Caverns and Rancors and Holo-Dancer, taking the Falcon up beside their father, Ben holding his brother in his arms and feeling the awkward but desperate response.

A kid that just wanted to be loved and comforted. That wanted a life of his own.

Ben sucked in a breath and screamed with the wrenching pain in his heart and soul—

“Hey!” came the deep voice from down below. “This parachute tastes really good.”

Ben’s panicked breaths turned into sobs of relief, his tears dripping into the pit.

Rey shouted, “What the hell took you so long to answer?! We thought you were dead, you idiot!”

“I was eating! Ben told me I shouldn’t talk with my mouth full!”

Ben buried his laughing sobs in his arms. He could have throttled his baby brother, but all that mattered was that he was alive.

All three of them were alive. Together, they could go home.

#

Kylo rose out of the pit on the boot rockets, still chomping a piece of parachute. When he landed, Ben thrust his arms around his brother and spun him around. When Ben set him down, Kylo stared at him with one eyebrow up.

Ben grasped his face. “Kylo…” Ben realized he’d never get those horrible images out of his head, and now that he understood what Kylo had endured, he would never let anyone hurt him ever again. Tears streamed down Ben’s face. “I thought we lost you! Damnit Kylo, I love you so damn much.” He grasped Kylo’s head and held him, wishing hugs alone could erase two decades of torment.

Ben kissed his head and rested his cheek atop Kylo’s hair, just so damn glad he was still alive, that he still had a chance to live a full life, a good life, and maybe that would help to erase those terrible years. “And don’t listen to what that piece of garbage said. You are not a waste. Ever! I don’t care how you came to be. Our lives are so much better for having you in it.”

When Ben finally let Kylo go, his face was so different, so much softer, vulnerable even.

Kylo blinked, lowered his eyes, and looked back up. “I liked that hug.” He tilted his head. “Why are you crying?”

Ben placed his hand on Kylo’s cheek. “I’m just so happy I still get to have you in my life. When you didn’t answer, we thought you didn’t make it.”

“Yeah,” Rey said, “you didn’t hear us contacting you through the bond?”

Kylo flinched. “No.”

Ben tried again. _Do you hear me now?_

Kylo didn’t move. “Why are you staring at me?”

Rey sighed. “It’s gone. It must have broken when Palpatine was destroyed. Either the Force was done with the bond or Palpatine was the only thing holding it together.”

Kylo shifted. “So I’m not part of the dyad anymore?”

Rey patted his shoulder. “Doesn’t look like it, buddy.”

Kylo hung his head and fingered the cross-section of belts on his chest. “Does that mean I can’t be your brother anymore?”

Ben’s jaw hit the ground. “Hey!” He tilted Kylo’s chin up. “You will _always_ be my brother. Forever.”

Kylo looked back and forth from Rey to Ben. “So I can still go home with you?”

Ben smiled and put his arm around Kylo, another around Rey. “Of course you can. With a real bed, a nice soft one, not like the cheesy bunk on the Falcon.” They started walking toward the exit.

“But the bunk _is_ soft. You mean there are beds that are softer?”

“With big fluffy pillows and thick warm blankets where you…” Ben swallowed, more memories that wouldn’t leave him. “…never have to be cold again.”

Kylo laughed and leaned forward to look at Rey. “Did you know about this?”

Rey chuckled. “Heard about but never really experienced.” She beamed. “I can’t wait.”

Ben held them both closer to him, so glad he could walk out of this hell with two people he loved and show them a life they only dreamed of. “Wait till you try a long, hot bath.”

Kylo spun toward him, eyes wide, mouth a little circle. “What’s _that_ like?”

#

Ben charged down the corridors of the Sith temple, Darth Vader helmet back on his head. It was a pain in the ass to carry, but he also couldn’t help but be amused by the reactions to it. Such shock in the cultists’ faces as they witnessed one of their old master’s return from the dead. Shock, reverence, fear…Ben didn’t want to enjoy the delicious feeling it gave him. Maybe Palpatine touched too deep of a nerve trying to force him all the way to the Dark Side.

Or just maybe it was well deserved. After what Ben had been forced to see, knowing what he knew, he wanted to see it all crumble.

This wasn’t like him, but in this place it’s what he had to be. These people served death, torture, and horror for the entire galaxy—and most especially, one little boy.

Ben wanted to watch them burn, but it was not his place to pass that judgment. 

Kylo flowed beside him like walking fire, his cross-hilt saber back in his hand, its flaming red already having taken down enemies in their way. Rey strolled on his right, walking like she owned the place, her yellow lightsaber in her right hand, Rock-Hound gun in her left.

It was Kylo’s time to return the favor toward his tormentors. No one had saved him. No one had comforted him. They all just watched while he suffered. Now the power paradigm had shifted, and Kylo was like a wild animal loosed upon those who had trapped him. Feral and ferocious, his red lightsaber cut through guards and cultists alike.

Rey took up the slack when the numbers grew too high, and she had her own payback to serve. She wound up the way she was because of the Sith’s constant desire for power. They played with lives and didn’t care who they hurt.

Ben didn’t bother drawing his saber. On the rare chance the two of them missed anyone, Ben just slammed the enemy into the wall using the Force. He was on a mission, and everyone needed to get the hell out of his way.

“This way,” Kylo said, leading them down another branch in the icy, ominous corridor. While dark and foreboding, Ben felt no more fear. The trio had vanquished the real enemy. These were all just incidentals.

Through another set of black, archaic, double doors that Kylo shoved open. He slid to his knees to duck under the attack of red-clad guards and cut the first two down in an instant. Rey leapt into the air at the next two, slicing through them with ease. After that final battle, this all seemed rather simple and insignificant. You didn’t face off against Darth Sidious, hand him his own ass, and then worry about piddly guards.

The joining of three corridors came with another flurry of guards, twelve of them. This time, Ben drew his blue lightsaber. In flashing red, yellow, and blue, the trio of knights ripped through the armored guards, though Ben had only used his weapon to block and deflect. In some ways, it was just more satisfying to slam his enemies. After a lifetime of limited power, and knowing what he now knew, there was a certain satisfying thrill in showing just how powerful he really was.

“This is it,” Kylo said, pointing toward another set of double doors. Ben deactivated his lightsaber, took off his helmet, and followed his brother’s lead.

Once inside the room in question, he slowed his pace as his eyes scanned the contents: glass tubing, giant jars with malformed bodies inside, liquids of various colors, and that archaic machinery from the ground to the high ceiling.

Rey deactivated her lightsaber once they determined the room was abandoned. “So, this is the place.”

Kylo hooked his lightsaber, eyes dim. “Where I was born.”

“As was my father.”

Ben strolled through the aisles, scanning the equipment, getting a feel for what went on here. He trailed a finger over a glass jar attached to a mechanized arm. He stopped at a workstation and examined the contents: holocrons, an outdated datapad, small jars with tissue samples.

Rey crossed her arms. “What do you want from here?”

Ben snatched up a holocron. “All of it.”

Rey sighed and pressed her fingers to her forehead. “Ben, no one’s carrying out giant jars of bodies. Can we be reasonable?”

Ben rubbed a thumb over the label on a test tube. “I don’t want to miss anything.”

“I know, Ben, believe me. I just don’t think we should spend a moment more here than we have to.” She brushed a lock of hair out of his face, and her touch started luring him back out of the mire. “I don’t like the effect this place is having on you.” Rey tipped her head toward Kylo. “I don’t think he should be here too long either.”

Kylo slid his fingertip down one of the giant jars. “This is how I was made.” He tilted his head, eyes trailing over the severely malformed body inside. “How many were made before they got me right? How many brothers…”

Ben nodded, knowing she was right about the both of them. “Let’s see if we can find some crates or something we can store this stuff in. We’ll need all the holocrons and all the books, I want this datapad, that entire wall of samples there, I’ll need those…”

#

Ben, Rey, and Kylo walked out of the Sith Temple for the last time, their arms full of boxes, books, and other items. More boxes and equipment floated behind them on the Force. All this was laid onto the giant pile they had already amassed.

There was more value beyond the cloning lab inside that temple, and maybe Ben shouldn’t have kept all he did, but there was value in knowledge. The weapons he could do without, but the holocrons, books, and artifacts, well, you never knew when knowledge would come in handy. The Jedi didn’t know all facets of the Force. These he would keep locked down and out of sight, only used when absolutely necessary.

He had also set Kylo to one more task that required knowledge of the building and someone who would relish the job more than anyone. Once they set the last crate down, it was time to finish the final piece of this mission.

Ben brought up the projection on his comm and held his arm out to Kylo. “Little brother, for everything you endured and had to suffer, I want you to do the honors.”

Kylo stared ahead at the building, eyes distant. He swallowed, and a softness enveloped him, edges of his mouth curving up. He pressed the icon on the projection, and those lips curled into a full smile. Ben pulled Rey and Kylo against him as the Sith Temple rumbled and exploded in roaring balls of fire. He stroked their arms as they watched the smoke rise to the sinking, mutilated Star Destroyers that crashed onto Exegol’s surface.

The Final Order in its final moments.

#

Ben had watched the Millennium Falcon land many times in his life, but he had never been so happy to see his father’s ship as he was in that moment. The Falcon shifted and landed. Ben could barely wait for the ramp to descend.

Leia stepped down in the lead, Han and Chewbacca behind her. She put her hands to her mouth and smiled. He could already see the tears sparkling in her eyes. She didn’t have to say a word. All three of her children—old, new, and future in-law—were coming home from the fight.

“Mom!” Ben cried and ran to her as she stepped off.

“My Ben!” she laughed as he scooped her in a twirling hug. “My baby, my boy! I’m so happy to see you! See you all! Oh you’re okay. You’re all okay.”

“I am,” Ben said, blinking down tears into her shoulder. “We are.”

Han stepped down, waiting for his turn. Kylo looked at Ben, sized him up, and ran straight for Han.

“Dad!” Kylo cried, mimicking Ben’s run toward his mother.

Han put his hands up. “Oh what the f—Kylo?!” The young man threw himself onto Han and knocked them both straight onto the ground.

Ben looked down and tried not to laugh. “Oh shit—Dad, you okay?”

Han groaned beneath the dark-haired giant. Kylo pushed himself up, looking so incredibly excited. “Are you happy to see me, Dad?”

Han breathed as if the life was being squeezed out of him. “I was until you did this.”

Chewbacca grabbed Kylo by the back of the cross-belts and hauled him up. Kylo didn’t miss a beat. He leapt onto Chewbacca and buried himself in all that fur.

“Are you happy to see me Hairy D—I MEAN CHEWBACCA!” Chewbacca roared and then gave a softer reply. “I don’t know what that means but your fur is soft.” Chewbacca murmured again and hugged Kylo.

Ben chuckled alongside his mother, watching those two. Then he kissed her on the head and helped his father up. “Dad?”

Han smiled. “Son.” The two men wrapped each other in a tight embrace, Han patting Ben hard on the back. “I’m glad you’re home,” Han whispered.

“Me too,” Ben whispered back.

Rey stood before Leia and put her hand on her hip. “I brought your sons home safe and sound.” She couldn’t suppress her grin.

Leia’s smile took up her entire face as she opened her arms. “Yes you did. Come here.” Leia hugged her tightly, eyes closed. “And you brought yourself home.” She leaned back and took Rey’s face into her hands. “This is all I wanted, the three of you together.”

Rey pointed. “We really have Kylo to thank. He’s the big hero of this story.”

Kylo turned toward her, his eyes huge in confusion. “What?”

Ben nodded. “It’s true. Rey and I got caught in something that we couldn’t get out of, and it was Kylo’s courage and heart and quick reflexes that allowed us to escape. Without him, we never would have made it. Hell, the galaxy never would have made it.”

Kylo looked back and forth to everyone. “I’m a hero?”

Rey smiled. “You sure are.”

He just stood there, stunned. Leia stuck her arms out and smiled. “Well let me give my hero-boy a hug and tell him how happy I am to see him!”

Kylo crept forward, even more in shock than before. He just kept taking shuffling steps and looking around as if someone would try to steal this moment from him. Rey chuckled, and it made her face look angelic. She was so happy for him, and when Ben caught her eyes, he told her with his smile how grateful he was that she gave this moment to Kylo.

The young man finally sped up as he neared Leia. He reached for her, but she was so incredibly tiny, he wasn’t sure how to hug her. Finally, he dipped to his knees and wrapped his arms around her stomach. Leia held his head, stroking his hair and chuckling in their embrace.

“So proud of you,” Leia said. “You saved your brother and Rey _and_ the whole galaxy. I am so glad we all get to go home together as a family.” She kissed him on the head, and when he stood, he had actual tears in his smiling eyes.

“I’m so happy,” Kylo said and laughed with a sniffle.

Ben beamed with absolute pride. This! This is what this was all for. This is what he fought for. That he could stand here now after the battle was won with his family, the love of his life, and a brother who could finally live. So much love filled his heart, he just wanted to laugh and cry at the same time like Kylo.

Not only did Ben have this, but he, Rey, and Kylo gave that opportunity to the rest of the galaxy. Sentient beings would live, love, and have the chance for joy and peace because of what the three of them had done.

Life was good, and it was just getting started.

#

The trio regaled the others of what went down while loading the Falcon with all the items from the temple. As the last ships of the Final Order crashed onto the surface, the military units of the New Republic took over the rest of the operation, which would be detaining any involved in the planned takeover of the galaxy as well as what to do with Exegol itself.

Ben didn’t care. He swiped the schematics for the entire mechanized planet while he was hacking it and would have fun playing with it later.

Plans were made to rendezvous once more on Ajan Kloss. The Resistance was planning a big celebration, but more importantly, Ben wanted his TIE Silencer back!

Jannah and Finn would ride with the Falcon for the one night it would take to get back to Ajan Kloss. Some celebrating needed to be done in quieter spaces than her ship provided.

Ben took one last look at the ominous landscape of Exegol. The ruins of the temple were still smoking. Now that it was all over, he could really assess the potential for danger and failure.

This could have been the day he died. Or Rey. Or Kylo. His parents and uncles. His friends. So much was at stake for a guy who spent most of his life operating from a basement.

But none of that mattered because they won. They saved each other in every which way, and now, finally, they would get to go home.

But home wasn’t what it used to be. Now, home would be so much better.

And smaller. They needed a bigger place. He brought up his comm and punched in all the things he wanted in a new house, one that could hold all of them comfortably. Along the way, his eyes caught the date and time.

Kylo sidled up to him. “Do we get to go to the Galacticon now?”

Ben just about smiled. “It’s um…it’s over.”

Kylo hung his head. “Oh…”

Rey grasped his arm. “Ben, I’m sorry. I know how much that meant to you.”

Ben nodded. “It did. And then this whole thing happened, and I found you, I found Kylo, made a friend in Finn, finally made a relationship with my father, saved the galaxy…found and saved myself.” He shook his head. “At one time an autograph from my favorite actor meant everything, but now I really _do_ have everything.” His smile took over his entire face. He grasped Rey’s and Kylo’s hands. “Being here right now with all of you means more to me than Galacticon ever will.” He shrugged. “Besides, there’s always next year, not to mention the local cons.” He counted off on his fingers. “Chandrila has Chanticon, Naboo has Boocon—that’s a nice one. Then there are the regional cons—Hannacon's a big one.”

“What about Day Havvens?”

Ben scratched his head. “Well, I met the real Anakin Skywalker, so I mean…Eh, who knows. Maybe one day I’ll get lucky…”

The grandest idea popped into his head, something that felt so perfectly right and timely that there was no mistake in knowing what had to be done and when. He turned to Rey, took her hand, and dropped to one knee.

The crew fell silent except for Leia’s soft gasp. Rey stared down, eyes wide.

“Rey?” Ben said, bearing a bright and wide smile. “I love you with every part of my soul. Will you…do me the honor of…going to Galacticon with me next year?”

Silence.

Han squeezed his eyes shut and turned his face toward the sky. “Oh Ben COME ON!”

Leia slapped her hand to her forehead. “Ben…”

Rey scratched her head with her free hand and covered her mouth, letting off a breath of exasperation.

Finn leaned in toward Jannah. “For the record, I would never do that.”

Ben looked around, bewildered. “What?”

Han yanked him to his feet. “You don’t get on one knee to ask a woman to a convention, you idiot!”

Ben still looked around, hands out. “What the—I don’t get—” And then it dawned on him. “OH MY STARS!” He clamped his hands to his mouth, eyes wide. He cringed, eyebrows turned up high. “Rey, I’m so sorry.”

She snickered and shook her head. “That’s my Ben.”

He thrust his hands into his hair. “Oh I fucked up this time—Rey look.” He grasped her shoulders, apologetic eyes locked on hers. “I want you to know that I love you more than words could ever process, and the only life I have ahead of me has you in it.” He stroked down her arms and brought her hands to his lips. “We’ve known each other such a short time—I mean, I know what I feel, but…” He tipped his head toward her. “Rey…one day I’m going to marry you. And I will make it special. Give me that time to show you who I really am, hell, to show you what being around me all the time is like.”

Han snorted. “Tell me about it.”

“But if you can tolerate my pickiness and complaining, the endless work, forgetting dinner, staying up until the next morning, and salivating over rocks, then I promise you, I will put a ring on your finger that will blow your mind and give you a life beyond your dreams.”

Rey slid into his embrace and draped her hands behind his neck. “You already have.” She tipped her head up, one eye closed in thought. “And in answer to your question, yes, I would love to go with you to Galacticon next year.”

Ben shook his head with the warmest smile, lifted her up into his arms, and kissed her. “Oh Rey. You’ve made me the happiest dork that ever lived!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if I scared anyone by having Kylo not answer (I do write high drama normally LOL) but I couldn't resist a "but Ben told me not to talk with my mouth full" moment LMAO! And how about Kylo the hero? Can you imagine the smile on his face? *squishy hugs* 
> 
> Part of what took so long to write the final battle scenes was wrestling with an idea that started from the previous chapter. When Ben falls into the machine and faces the first guard, originally I had Ben kill him and then get nauseous and horrified that he actually killed someone (despite training as a Jedi.) At that point though, things were already amusing and I didn't want to put a damper on it. I also realized, and correct me if I'm wrong, that Ben hasn't directly killed anyone this entire fic (except the worms in the beginning and I'm not sure that spider did too well.) He did make the freeze bomb, but Kylo was the one that threw it. So when faced with that idea, I had to decide (and it took me a few days) whether to have Ben kill for once and wrestle with it or have Ben go the whole fic with lightsabers and guns and bombs and the Force and manage not to directly kill anyone. I mean, it's war, and with those cultists and guards, it was kill or be killed, but I thought wouldn't it just be a Ben thing to have gotten through all that without personally adding to the body count?
> 
> Ben on one knee before Rey LMAO! Silly boy!
> 
> Ah poor Ben missing Galacticon :( But don't fret. Who knows what the future holds? Our story isn't over yet. Ben may have saved THE galaxy, but he hasn't yet saved HIS galaxy! Still a few more chapters to go, stay tuned!


	19. Heroes Heading Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, that's a little too much - oh boy...  
> Celebrations abound as our heroes make their way back home. Leia's wine is entirely too tasty...
> 
>   
>    
> 

Once they got back on the Falcon, Ben had to make a quick call to the office.

“Torbin!” Ben said with his ear-piece in. “How’s my chief operating officer?…Yes I’m alive, why wouldn’t I be?…Oh Palpatine? Yeah, he’s dead, totally dead…Like destroyed his entire spirit dead, like no one’s bringing him back dead, not a giant talking mouse, not bad writers, no one. I have video…yeah, totally recorded everything from all three of us so that we’d have data on how the SOLO-Chutes work in real world situations as well as the SOLO-Booster. Marketing will love it, I’m telling you…Well me and Rey and my brother Kylo…Yeah I have a brother, he’s a clone of me, which is why I need those genetics experts, remember like we talked about?…Well then celebrate, but when I get back I want to get moving on this project…of course I celebrated. I downed an entire bottle of Hyper-Fuel!…Oh well I don’t know, I’m sure the others will throw a party or something—honestly, I just want to get to work on the genetics project. Torbin, I have Sith cloning data…Yes, holy shit indeed, the whole thing, reports, books…yes, real paper books, I got components—Torbin? Are you salivating? Because I’m salivating…”

#

“Oh Mom,” Ben said, crumpling on the couch in the lounge. “You really outdid yourself. That was the best dinner I’ve had in forever.”

Leia patted his head and set a bottle of wine down. “I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I reserved my best to celebrate a job well done, and that we’re all here to enjoy it.”

Han shook his head and set down a brand new jug of whiskey. “Where the hell did you find all this food to cook? I’m surprised we have anything left with how much you’ve been making and those two giants have been eating.”

“Han, if you actually _moved_ things and look behind the stuff in front, you’d see I packed you plenty.”

Han made a mocking, haughty face and opened the jug. “Time to celebrate for real.”

Leia set down brand new clear SOLO cups. “I couldn’t agree more. Who wants some wine? Top label from the best vineyard on Chandrila. I only break this out for extra special occasions.”

Ben waved her off. “Not me. I’m banned from alcohol after last time.”

Kylo grunted. “I don’t like hangovers.”

Leia poured anyway. “Oh a little taste won’t hurt. It’s so good, you have to try it.”

Rey scooped up a cup. “I’m in. A pirate never rejects an offer of booze.” She took a sip and her eyes widened. “Oh holy shit, this is incredible.” She took another drink and closed her eyes, humming in delight. “Oh yes. This is divine.”

Ben and Kylo eyed each other.

“Told you.” Leia took a sip of hers. “It’s smooth perfection. You don’t even taste the alcohol.”

Han downed his cup. “What the hell’s the point then?”

Rey shoved a cup at Ben. “Just try it. One mouthful won’t wreck you.”

Ben curled his mouth in distrust but decided on a tiny sip, anyway. After a growling purr of delight, he took a far bigger drink. “Oh my stars, Mom. This is incredible, not like that crap Dad drinks.”

Han pointed his cup. “Corellian spirits are a treat for sophisticated tastes, not like that Hyper-Fuel junk you guzzle. I got high off of that garbage!”

Ben snorted. “Lightweight.” He took another drink. “Oh wow, Mom, tell me you have more of this.”

Leia smiled. “Oh I got enough to celebrate with, don’t you worry, you enjoy it.”

Rey destroyed the contents of her cup and added some more. “I’m enjoying it!”

Kylo watched Ben pour the rest of his cup down his throat. “I…I want to enjoy it.”

Ben shook his head. “Bad headache, remember?”

“Just try it.” Rey stuck a full cup in Kylo’s hands. “What’s one little sip gonna do?”

Kylo took a drink. Then a gulp. Then another…

_One hour later…_

“All’s I’m saying…” Ben drained the contents of his cup and dropped his elbow to the holo-chess board, finger up. “…is you don’t want to introduce carbon to the mix. You start introducing carbon and…and…it’s over, you know? It’s just over.”

Rey, her eyelids halfway down, swayed in her chair, her finger also up. “Yeah but…yeah but, and hear me out. What if, and this is just if, what if there was no carbon? Like at all. In the universe? What would we do? I mean really, what would we do?”

“What happened to the carbon?!” Kylo wept into Ben’s arm. “I don’t want to live in a universe without carbon. I…I don’t even know what it is, but it’s just so sad, he didn’t do anything to anyone and now he’s just…he’s gone!”

Finn devoured Jannah in the corner. “Baby, you give a damn about this carbon?”

Jannah draped herself over him. “Only if it’s in your pants.” She leapt onto him and they crashed to the floor.

Han pointed his middle finger from his whiskey cup. “None of you people know how to be drunk. It’s an art. It’s sophisticated. You treat it with respect.”

Leia waved her hand at him. “Oh shut the hell up you old fuck. No one wants to hear your crap.”

“Who are you calling an old fuck?” Whiskey splashed out of his cup as he pointed it at her. “You’re just lucky I can’t get up so good right now.”

“Oh blow it out your ass.”

“Ah nah.” Ben pushed himself to his feet. “Ah nah, Dad messing with you, Mom? Nah, nah, I’m-a kick his ass for you. Come on, Kylo.” He dragged the sobbing mess off the couch. “Come on. We’re gonna go kick Dad’s ass.”

“But I don’t wanna!” Kylo clung to Ben’s leg and was dragged across the floor. “Daddy’s a good daddy, not a mean daddy. He cooks me real food and wants me to snuggle with him.”

“SMUGGLE!” Han barked. “Damnit boy!”

“I want to smuggle _and_ snuggle! No one ever snuggles me!” He sobbed into Ben’s leg and was dragged some more.

Leia pointed her finger. “No smuggling! We got so much damn money we don’t know what to do with it and your dumbass is over there smuggling. Han, you gotta cut the shit.”

Rey laughed until she almost fell out of her chair. “I love how Leia swears more and more the drunker she gets!”

Leia huffed and sat up in the most prim manner. “I am most certainly _not_ drunk. I am a princess and senator who enjoys the light relaxation of a fine wine.”

Rey laughed until she screamed. “You are sooooo drunk!” She squawked and fell out of her seat.

“Know what?” Ben said. “I gots a better idea. Let’s go kick Uncle Chewy’s ass.”

Kylo wept with all his might into Ben’s leg. “I don’t want to hurt Hairy Daddy. He’s so nice to me.”

“Nah, nah, he’s…he’s always throwing stuff—hey!” Ben threw a cup at Chewbacca and missed by ten feet. “That’ll…that’ll show’em.”

Kylo stumbled to his feet and leapt onto Chewbacca. He scrambled and turned with his arms out to protect the Wookiee. “NO! I won’t let you hurt Hairy Daddy! He’s big and furry and he’s my snuggle buddy, and you GET AWAY FROM HIM!”

Ben waved his arm wide with his finger pointed. “Nah nah, just trust me. We’re gonna kick his ass. It’s cool, you’ll see.”

“NOOO!” Kylo curled onto Chewbacca’s lap. “Don’t hurt my snuggle buddy!” Chewbacca roared, stood, and dumped Kylo into Han’s lap.

“Damnit!” Han growled, whiskey all over him. “What the hell did I ever do to you?”

“NO!” Kylo cried, reaching for Chewbacca. “My snuggle buddy!” He rolled off of Han’s lap onto the floor.

Ben balled his fists. “Oh that’s it. That’s it. I’m gonna kick your ass now, Uncle Chewy. No one hurts my baby brother. He’s just a baby, look at him!”

A giant, twenty-year-old man crawled sobbing across the floor. “My snuggle buddy! I lost my snuggle buddy!”

Ben waved his fists in the air and teetered. “See? You don’t… you don’t…I’m-a kick your ass now.”

Leia waved Kylo over. “Come sit by me, baby. I’ll snuggle you.”

Dark swimming eyes looked up with hope. “Really?”

“You go get a pillow and I’ll snuggle my little boy.”

Ben screamed as he was tossed across the lounge.

Kylo smiled. “Okay!” He pushed to his feet, ran, hit the wall and spun, but kept running.

Rey slammed her hand on the floor as she laughed, neither Finn nor Jannah had shirts on anymore, and Ben groaned in a corner.

_A half hour later…_

“And I’m telling you.” Leia stroked Kylo’s hair as he lay with his head on a pillow on her lap. “I just couldn’t do it again. I mean, Ben was ten and a half pounds, and look at me! I’m this tiny thing, and he’s this giant Tauntaun, and he just _destroyed_ me.”

“Poor Mommy,” Kylo said, eyes hazy. “I like having a mommy. You’re the best mommy ever and I like your cooking and I’m sorry I was mean and said bad things.”

“Awww, you just didn’t know any better, but now you’re a big boy and you grew up so fast and so did Ben, but not really. He still needs his mommy for _everything._ ”

Ben lay on the floor with Rey draped on his stomach, waving his hands in the air. “Johnny was a scientist but now he is no more, for what he thought was H2O was H2SO4.”

Rey pushed her finger into the tip of his nose. “That’s the best song I ever heard. That’s my favorite song now.”

Leia shook her head. “Having Ben was like having four children at once, not because he’s gigantic because he is, but he’s so _needy_ , all his fears and pickiness and you couldn’t leave him with ingredients for anything or he’d blow up your kitchen.”

“NAH!” Ben stuck his finger in the air. “I only blowed up the kitchen three times. I figured out what was wrong after that.”

“And we sent him to the Temple because we figured it would be good for him, get to learn how to use his powers, and he cried and cried because he didn’t want me to leave him there, so we gave him a brand new chemistry set to keep there and yeah, that finally shut him up, but look how _that_ turned out.”

“NAH! Uncle Luke was being a dick!”

“But we always took him home on weekends even though Luke said it was stupid but who the hell is he? Just because he’s my twin doesn’t give him any right to tell me how to raise my little muffin!”

Kylo looked up. “Can I be a muffin too?”

“How about you be my fudgy little brownie?”

Kylo smiled and nestled back down. “I like brownies.”

C3PO shuffled into the room with Melanie behind him. “Oh my, Miss Melanie! It seems we are the only sensible ones left on this ship!”

Melanie touched his brassy shoulder. “Looks like you’re in charge now, you sexy beast.”

C3PO jolted in shock. “Pardon me?!”

Ben’s finger waved in the air again. “You wanna know something? According to chemistry, alcohol _is_ a solution!”

Han slammed his cup down and nearly fell into the table. “Damn right it is.”

“Ya wanna hear more science jokes? They’re right at the tip of my tungsten.” Ben cackled and Rey snorted into his stomach. “Oh Rey, love of my life, we fit together like recombinant strands of DNA.”

Rey sat up and smooshed his cheeks. “That is sooooo true! I don’t even know what it means, but it’s soooo true!”

“It’s a good thing I’m not primarily a physicist and you’re not primarily a biologist or else we’d have no chemistry.” He snorted into his laugh and dropped his hands to the ground.

Rey sat up and rubbed his chest while laughing. “You are sooo funny, even when I don’t get anything you’re saying! Come on.” She pulled him up. “Let’s go get more drink.” She fought to her feet, grabbed Ben’s hand, and heaved to get him up. Her efforts were rewarded by being pulled right back down, both of them splattering to the floor.

Chewbacca hauled him to his feet. Ben grasped the wall and wobbled while Rey was also set upright. Leia waved them away from the bottle. “No more drinks for you two. Go to bed, you’re a mess.”

Ben stuck his finger in Rey’s cheek. “Mom…Mom has good ideas, you know?”

“Yeah,” Rey said, “I get that. I see that. That’s why she’s a senator and general and princess, all about the good ideas. Hey!” She pointed to Kylo, whose eyes were nearly closed. “Kylo. Kylo. Kylo. You should, you should stick your thumb in your mouth. You’d like that.”

He looked up in a daze. “Wha? You mean like this?” He clenched his hand and slipped his thumb between his lips.

“Yeah, that’s perfect. That’s—” She tried not to laugh. “—so perfect.”

Ben waved his hand. “Nah, that’s not nice. That’s not nice, Rey.”

“No?”

“Nah, Kylo, take your thumb out of your mouth.” His brother obliged. Ben brought a half-full cup of wine over, stuck his brother’s thumb in it, and guided it back to the Kylo’s mouth. The young man started suckling again, his eyes closing. “See Rey? You can’t just—you gotta put the wine on it first, know what I mean?”

“Oh, you’re right. That’s why you’re the scientist.”

“Yeah, according to science, thumbs need wine.”

Leia waved them off. “Go to bed, you two. You’re drunk. Really… really drunk. I’m not so drunk.”

Ben snorted into giggles. “Mommy is soooo drunk!”

“Go to bed!”

Ben took Rey’s hand. “Come on. We don’t need these guys. Let’s go be drunk in bed.”

They stumbled into the bunkroom, rolled into the bunk, and shut the privacy door. The first thing he did was plant the sloppiest, drunkiest kiss into her mouth. That was about all he could do.

“Kylo had the right idea,” Ben said. “Know what I should do? I should sleep with your boob in my mouth.”

Rey shook her head. “Nooo, you should sleep with _your_ boob in your mouth.”

Ben nodded. “Yeah, that’s a good idea.” He pulled his shirt off and tried reaching down on himself. He stuck his tongue way out, flapping it around, before plopping back down with a sigh. “I can’t reach.”

“Okay, then I’ll sleep with your boob in my mouth.”

“Yeah, that’s a good idea.”

“For science.”

“Yeah, for science.”

Rey opened her mouth wide and took in Ben’s nipple, snuggled in, and closed her eyes.

Ben rested his chin on her head and smiled. “Yeah, this is right. This makes sense. I love you soooo much and now I get to keep you forever. On my boob.”

#

Ben stumbled into the lounge feeling like someone had stacked fifty bricks on his head. Rey trundled behind him but still seemed to be doing better than he was. At this point she was probably a professional.

“Jug of pirate hangover cure, coming right up.” Rey plodded into the galley.

Leia sat on the couch with Kylo in her lap as if neither had left that spot last night. His knees were drawn up, eyes shut tightly while she waved the medtech over his head. She nodded toward the galley. “Breakfast is keeping warm on your special plate whenever you’re ready.”

“Thanks Mom,” Ben muttered. He sat by his brother’s feet. “Kylo, buddy, how are you holding up there?” Kylo responded with an incoherent groan.

Leia stroked Kylo’s hair with her free hand. “Medtech should take effect soon.”

Ben shook his head and regretted it. “We shouldn’t have let him get that drunk last night.”

“We were _all_ drunk last night, but we’ll keep an eye on him next time.”

“No more alcohol!” Kylo sputtered.

“Awww honey, we’ll cut you off at half a glass from now on, okay?”

Kylo nestled into the pillow. “Okay.”

Ben really wished Kylo would get done with the medtech already. He could use the sucker. “Did you both stay out here all night?”

“Kylo did,” Leia said. “I slipped out from under him after he fell asleep. After I got done making breakfast, I found him curled up in agony.”

Ben ran his fingers through his hair. “Amazing neither of us can handle a drink even with Dad’s genes.”

“Oh he got blitzed last night, too; he’s in the galley grumping more than usual.”

Rey came in with a carafe of icky but wonderfully helpful pirate hangover cure. Ben helped Kylo sit up and handed him a cup before grabbing his own.

“This stuff is amazing,” Ben said. “What’s in it, anyway?”

Rey just giggled.

Leia brushed Kylo’s hair back. “Head feel better now?”

He nodded and whispered his thanks before taking another sip.

“Good. When you’re ready, breakfast is waiting. We’ll be at Ajan Kloss in two hours and I expect they’ll want to celebrate again, so be prepared.”

Kylo shook his head. “No more alcohol.”

Ben rubbed the medtech against his own head. “I’m with you there, brother.”

#

Celebration didn’t begin to describe the party at the Resistance base. It was more like an extravaganza. Food, alcohol, fireworks, music, dancing, it was loud, crazy and everything Ben did NOT particularly care for.

Still, he had to play his part. Resistance leaders spoke, Leia spoke, and the trio were pulled up on stage to regale everyone with what happened inside the temple. This part Ben actually enjoyed because he got to upload the videos they recorded from their suits and explain everything that was happening, including how his products worked (though he was having second thoughts about making the freeze bomb available considering its devastating effects.)

A delegate of the Galactic Senate was there to give thanks on behalf of the New Republic and hand out medals of honor. Leia received hers with her usual grace, Han accepted his with his usual bravado, and Chewbacca was pleased to finally have one of his own.

Poe, Finn, and Jannah received theirs, and finally the delegate reached Ben’s trio. Rey kept her badass air about her as she accepted hers, but her smile spoke of how deeply it actually meant to her. Ben graciously accepted his award, even if it didn’t feel like he had really earned it. It was nice, it really was, to be honored for putting his life on the line in saving the galaxy. But in some ways he would rather have been recognized for his discoveries and innovations. This adventure was just a side trek in his lifelong mission, but it felt good to be appreciated for once.

Kylo looked like he couldn’t get off the stage fast enough. When the delegate stood before him, Kylo eyed the man with deep suspicion.

“Kylo Ren. The Galactic Senate is aware of your alliance with the Final Order.”

Ben could feel the waves of tension pour off his brother, and honestly he felt it in himself. If this guy turned around and ordered Kylo to be arrested, Ben was liable to be next in prison for what he’d do to stop it.

“We have also been made aware that without your information, defeat of the Final Order would not have been possible. And as you were also instrumental in bringing down Palpatine and the Final Order, we have decided to grant you a full pardon and immunity from prosecution of war crimes.”

Cheers erupted while Kylo looked around confused. He stiffened as the delegate stepped forward and hung the medal over his neck. With a nod of thanks, Kylo grasped the gold medallion and turned it in the light, running his fingertips over it.

Ben put his arm around him. “You’re free, Kylo, you big hero, you. You never have to worry about the Final Order or anything that came from it ever again. You can come home and start a whole new life, leave all of that behind.”

Kylo looked around at everyone still cheering for him and smiled so widely it was as if an entirely new person was standing there before them.

#

Ben left the party early. Too loud, too bright, too many people: it just wasn’t his thing. His idea of celebrating would be the moment he stepped into his house with his girl and his brother and started his new life with them. Plus, Mom would probably make something incredible, then they could all sit down and play Caverns and Rancors or look at his mineral collection or he could even teach the two of them how to play some fighting video games so they could bash on each other without getting hurt.

Ohhhh, maybe they’d even do some live action roleplaying! Ben had to secure some costumes and padded weapons. Nothing he had would fit Rey. Maybe they could rent a mansion and do a crime scene game or play vampires. So many choices, much better than all that loud crap outside.

Besides, he had a lot of work to do.

Ben unpacked the crates in the cargo hold and immediately started recording data from the Sith cloning operation. Difficulty rose as the Sith runes started coming up. All the books were written in a language no one was teaching outside of Exegol. Damn. Maybe C3PO could help him translate.

“Here you are,” Kylo said, fingertips in his pockets.

Ben looked up from his microscope. “What’s up?”

Kylo scratched his head. “The party is…too much now.”

“Aw, thought you were having fun.”

“I did at first. It was nice to celebrate, have fun, be free with myself. Rey made sure I got to take part, explained everything to me, but…I don’t know…”

“Got too loud, too bright, too people-y?”

Kylo let out a breath of relief. “Yes!”

Ben smiled and remembered the vision of Kylo as a small child. “We’re a lot alike. Believe me, I get it.”

Kylo shifted. “I _wish_ I was more like you. I like all these things you do. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. Who I’m supposed to be.” He rubbed a hand over his face.

“Well, now you have the freedom to find all of that out. Every day you’ll learn more about what you like and your own special talents. We started out the same, but we’re still individuals. You’ll find your path.” He scooted over. “Until then, I’d be glad to show you everything I do. If you want to join me, I’m going through the cloning data.”

Kylo shrugged. “Yeah, sure.” He knelt beside Ben and flipped the cover of one book. “Preservation of Life in the Darkness.”

Ben spun toward him. “You can read that?!”

“Of course I can. I didn’t get to go to school like you, but I had to learn everything of the Sith, what I was allowed to, anyway. This stuff they kept from me, but yeah, I can read what it says.”

Ben clasped his shoulder. “You are officially my lab partner. We are going to get crazy-nerdy in here!”

Kylo broke into a smile, excitement lighting in his eyes. “Okay!”

“But first…” Ben drew two bottles of Hyper-Fuel to his hands. He popped the tops and handed one to Kylo. “You must drink of the ritual wine to be inducted into the sacred hall of the mighty nerd!”

Kylo took the drink and blinked at him. “What?”

Ben clinked his bottle with Kylo’s. “Drink up, will help you concentrate and stay up for days. We have a lot of material to go through.”

#

“This is it.” Ben showed his mother the projection from his comm. “Ten bedrooms, huge kitchen and dining area, pool—need a shade over that—gardens galore, patio, short walk to the beach, you and dad can have your own wing, Rey and I can have another, and I guess Uncle Chewy and Kylo can have the third, but it’s all close, we’ll all be together. Even has this little extension here so I can set up my lab and you don’t have to worry about me blowing up the house anymore.”

Leia looked up at him and shook her head. “Oh Ben, I don’t know. I mean it’s beautiful, but you should have your own home, and I don’t know that we could ever leave ours. We’ve been there for years.”

“But Mo-o-om! I need you there!”

Leia sighed and tilted her head. “Ben, you are a grown man, and you have Rey and Kylo now. You don’t need me.”

Ben was already on the verge of tears and the conversation hadn’t even started. “Mom, I _want_ you there! You and Dad and Uncle Chewy—I love you guys! And I love our family, exactly as we have it. And Kylo needs you, really needs you.” He shrugged. “And I do too. I mean, I _could_ live on my own, but I’m just happier knowing you’re close by. Maybe I’ll never grow up, not in that way, but…isn’t it a minor thing compared to what I _can_ do?”

Leia cupped his cheek. “Ben…”

He pointed to the projection. “Did you see the gardens? Really see them? You could fit ten of yours in there. And the beach? You love the beach! You can walk there every day if you want to. I mean, I can only go at sunset, but you can go any time you want.” He took her hands. “Please Mom? The house is too small for all of us, and once I help Rey and we start a family…” He kissed her fingers. “Please?”

Leia heaved out a long, frustrated breath and regarded him with a mix of impatience and undying love. “Let’s ask your father what he thinks—HAN!”

His father grumped into the galley where they had been talking. “What now?”

“Ben wants to move all of us into a new house. I told him we need to discuss it with you first.”

“Hell wrong with the one we got?”

“Too small for Ben’s life goals. Show him.”

Ben flipped through the pictures and explained everything to his father. “Plus there’s loads of room to park the Falcon _and_ the Silencer, no pissy complaints from the neighbors. Tell me it isn’t perfect.”

Han crossed his arms. “How much is this gonna cost us?”

“Nothing. I’m paying for it. I told you I have loads of credits stored up.”

Han ran his tongue along his bottom lip and turned to Leia. “Your son offers to put us in a mansion with no expense to us and you think we need to discuss it?”

Leia put her hands on her hips. “Han—”

“Sold! Buy it. Let’s pack our shit when we get home.”

“Han! We can’t just…” She turned from Ben’s hopeful face to Han’s stony one and tossed her hands up. “Oh…alright, I guess—but you have to give me time to really consider it once we’re actually home! I can’t just uproot my life after all these years.”

Ben snatched her in a hug. “Mommy-Mommy-Mommy!” He kissed her head over and over. “I’ll contact the agent and we’ll do a walkthrough and you’ll see for yourself and everyone will get to see it—it’ll be perfect, you’ll see!”

#

Ben pointed out the cockpit windows as they lowered in Chandrila’s atmosphere headed toward the outskirts of Hanna City. “And there’s the Silver Sea. There’s a great boardwalk with games and prizes and food galore, and you can go swimming, but I only like to go on cloudy days.”

Kylo stared with his mouth agape. “I want to see it! When can we go?”

“Once we get settled in at home, any time you want.”

He grinned, then it fell. “I don’t know how to swim, though.”

“That’s okay. I’ll teach you.” Ben tipped his head up to Rey standing beside him. “Oh and sweetie pie, there’s an incredible obstacle course shooting range close to the boardwalk. I’ve never done it, but I saw a video of it and wish I could shoot a damn thing to make it worthwhile.”

Rey spun the regulator on one of her guns to adjust the caliber. “Well, you teach Kylo to swim, and I’ll teach you to shoot. We can go for a swim, have dinner on the boardwalk, and shoot the shit out of stuff after.” She grinned. “I love this day already!”

“Too bad Finn didn’t stay with us. Be nice to do all that with a friend for once. Then I can shove it in everyone’s face that I actually have one! As well as a girlfriend—man, I get to shove stuff in people’s faces! This is great!”

Rey chuckled and rubbed his shoulder. “Good, because I love shoving myself in people’s faces. It amuses me. Eh, Finn’s doing right for himself. He was always more the Jedi type anyway, kept getting all nervous and shaky when I’d show my Dark side. He’ll do great with Luke, _and_ I think Jannah’s going with him. Her Force flow is light, but it’s there.”

“Must be hard to leave the people she leads though. That’s one thing I hated about being at the Temple, leaving my family behind.” He smiled. “But I won’t have to do that ever again if I get my way—oh! Kylo! Here we are. That house right down there. Here we go.”

Kylo’s eyes trailed over the cockpit windows. “Everything’s so _bright_.”

Ben grunted. “Yeah, I know. It sucks.”

“No, it’s…” He smiled. “Beautiful.”

The Falcon landed, settled, and the ramp dipped to the ground. In that time Ben donned his sunglasses, hat, and popped open his parasol. He stepped down with Rey alongside him and still flinched when he reached sunlight.

Kylo stepped off the ramp, and his eyes immediately clamped shut. Still, he smiled as he waved his incredibly pale hands in the air. “So warm…I can’t see but it feels so good. I never felt bright sunlight on my skin before like this.”

Ben took off his hat and placed it on Kylo’s head. “Don’t stay out too long or you’ll burn. You’ll have to build a little tolerance.”

Kylo’s eyes opened once they were shaded. A broad smile spread across his face as he took in the house, the sky, Leia’s garden. He nudged the grass by his toes and giggled. “I can’t believe I get to stay here.”

Rey put her arm around Ben’s waist. “I know exactly how you feel.”

Ben smiled down at her. “I can’t believe you are going to stay with me.”

Rey nestled into his shoulder. “I’d never leave you, my love.”

Ben felt a moment of tension through their bond that reminded him of the immense work ahead of him. He swallowed it down, kept his smile, and started for the back door. “Come on. Let’s get the two of you settled before we unpack. Kylo, you can have my old bedroom upstairs, I’ll show you where that is, and Rey?” Ben cleared his throat. “I feel like an incredible asshole saying this, but my current bedroom is in the basement and…” He forced a toothy smile.

Rey slid her hands behind his neck. “I would sleep in a filthy hole in the ground as long as it was beside you.”

Ben breathed out a sigh of relief. “Oh good, because it’s not much better. It’s just I like being close to my work and I forget to sleep and I collapse so it was better to be down there and—”

“Ben, relax. I don’t care. I’m sure I’ve been in worse.”

Ben led them into the house and packed his parasol. “It’s just temporary, anyway. I want to look at a new place, a bigger place, one were we can fit the entire family and…you know…room for expansion.” He gave her a crooked grin.

Her smile hid the tension beneath. “It sounds lovely.”

Kylo gasped as he walked inside. “This is our _home_? It’s a palace!”

“Hardly,” Leia said as she stepped in, “but it’s home, and yours as well as ours.”

Kylo ran through the different rooms, such incredible excitement on his face.

Ben led him upstairs and pointed to his old bedroom. “Until we decide to move, this is all yours, Kylo.”

It wasn’t much, really. Sizable of course, but after becoming a spare bedroom it only had the essentials: bed, dressers, a comfy chair and some curtains.

Kylo stepped in with awe alight on his face. “This is for me?”

Ben smiled. “Yep! And there’s your fluffy bed I promised.”

Kylo giggled in glee and leapt onto it, mushing himself into the pillows. Rey chuckled as she watched Kylo roll himself up in the blanket, face full of bliss. Then he untangled himself, leapt off, and grabbed Ben in a giant hug. “Thank you!”

Ben squeezed his brother back. “Of course, Kylo. And when we get a bigger place, you can set up your new room exactly how you want it, whatever you want.”

“I already have everything I want.”

Ben breathed into his brother’s shoulder. “Me too, Kylo. Me too.”

#

“And this is my lab.” Ben stepped aside to let Kylo explore. “Now just remember that 90% of the stuff in here could probably kill you, so make sure you ask before you touch, okay?”

Kylo just nodded and stared in wonder.

Ben tipped his head toward his bedroom. “Rey, here’s the room I didn’t dare show you when I first met you. I’m lucky I was able to _breathe_.”

Rey snorted. “Actually, you weren’t able to.”

“That’s…that is true. Come on.” He signaled the door to open and remained by the doorway. “It’s not much. I kind of feel bad for even asking you to stay with me here.”

Rey strolled in, taking in the place with the same calm as she did when she first saw the lab. There were no windows, which Ben preferred. The bed was enormous as was the 3D projection viewing unit. Not much else besides drawers, a closet full of black long-sleeved shirts and black pants, and posters of Galaxy Wars and Caverns and Rancors.

Ben scratched his head. “I’d um…stay away from the third drawer in the center.”

Rey snorted. “Have your own version of the top left drawer, do you?”

Ben felt his cheeks redden. “Sort of.”

“Well, after what I saw on the Falcon, nothing would shock me. Besides, I might just be interested.” She winked and leapt backwards onto his bed. “Comfy.” In Kylo fashion, she rolled around into the pillows and wrapped herself in the blankets, making Ben chuckle. “Definitely better than the bunk. Roomier. Nice and soft too. I like.” She sat up, legs wide, and motioned for him to come over.

Ben felt his breaths quicken as he drew near. This was the first time a girl had ever been in his bed. Or his room. Or his house. Or his life. He stopped at the edge of the bed, and she continued to wiggle her finger, beckoning him closer. As he leaned down, she grasped his shirt and pulled him down on top of her.

Back in familiar territory, with his own blankets and space and scent, feeling her beneath him was an entirely new experience even after all they had shared. This beautiful woman wanted him and would stay with him, right here, in this bed. He would wake up with her beside him, lay down with her at night, and all the lonely pleasure he’d had in this space would be lonely no more. Somehow, his room seemed all the brighter, more alive. No longer a hole in the ground.

“I like your room,” she whispered into his neck, sending tingles along his skin.

“Yeah? I thought maybe it was kind of pathetic in comparison to what you were used to.”

Rey cackled. “Oh you don’t want to know what I’m used to. But know what I like best about it.”

“What’s that?”

“How far and closed off it is from all the other rooms.” She kissed his neck. “Where no one can hear us.” Kissed his jawline. “And we have all the room we want.” This one landed on his lips.

He pressed his already growing desire right against her, making her gasp. “Then maybe having my bedroom down here was the best idea I’ve ever had.”

She slid a leg up around his hip. “Maybe it is.”

He sunk a kiss deep into her, still wrestling with the reality that this was a real girl in his actual room, and that he was kissing her and she was arching up against him, and—

Kylo popped his head in. “What’s with all the rocks?”

Ben pressed his forehead against Rey’s and let out a long, frustrated sigh. “Promise we’ll pick this up later?”

Rey nudged his nose. “Agreed.”

#

Ben flicked on the light in the display case. “So this is my mineral collection, and believe me, I’ll fill you in on all the elements and crystal structures and hardness scales as time goes on.”

Kylo studied the array of rocky growths. “Why do you collect things?”

Ben shrugged. “Just feels exciting to have something you enjoy around you. Or sometimes it’s because it’s valuable, but I’m more about the enjoyment than the resale value.”

“Ohhh. I collected the blood of my enemies!”

Ben blinked. “What?”

“Yeah, after I defeated them, I’d wipe their blood on my wall. I totally get it!”

Ben glanced at Rey. “Cooool, so perhaps we can help you start a collection of your own that’s…a little less…murder-y.”

Kylo thought about it, then nodded. “Yeah, probably a good idea.”

Rey reached into her pouch and pulled out the rock Ben had given her. She handed it to him. “Here. You can put this away now.”

Ben blinked with all the hurt in his soul. “But…that was my first gift to you.”

She smiled up at him. “And I still love it. So let’s put it back in our collection where we can both enjoy it.”

Bubbles of delight rose in Ben. “ _Our_ collection? Oh baby, you really do love me, don’t you?”

“With all my heart and soul.”

While they shared in a kiss, Kylo scraped his boots on the ground. “Can um…can I be a part of the collection too?”

Ben smiled and pulled him into a hug along with Rey. “Of course. We’re the trio forever, no matter what dyads or the Force or anything has to say about it.”

Rey poked his arm. “Show Kylo the thing.”

“Oh, right!” Ben commanded the lights to turn off and hit the switch for the shortwave UV light on the display case.

Kylo cooed in wonder at all the bright colors before him. “How?! Is this from the Force? Are these kyber crystals?”

“Nope! The ultraviolet light excites the electrons in fluorescent minerals, causing them to jump to a higher orbital in the atomic structure. When it jumps back down to its original orbital, it releases energy and emits light. They don’t look like much until they are displayed in the right light.” Ben smiled. “Just like the three of us. An isolated ultra-nerd, a hardened space pirate, and an angry warlord. The universe could have written us off, but when the right time came, we all shone with our special light and illuminated the galaxy. This collection _is_ us.”

Rey leaned back against Ben, and Kylo tipped his head onto his brother’s shoulder. The trio of Darkness and Light, together despite all the odds against them, ready to start living.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo is a free and happy man, our space trio is home, and you'd think this was the end of the story BUT NO!! BWAH HA HA! We are not at the end yet!
> 
> The next chapters will be vignettes taking place in time jumps as we leap forward in their new lives. There are still problems to solve, lives to explore, and Ben has not quite yet finished his metamorphosis! 
> 
> Stay tuned as this may take me a little longer than usual. I really want to finish this crazy epic off just right. I expect at least one more chapter or possibly two and then an epilogue that jumps us nearly a decade into the future to see how our babies are doing. Again, thank you for hanging in for this novel. I never expected this little prompt inspired by a silly photo manipulation to turn into a Stephen King sized paperback. It's even bigger than my Striking at Shadows story and I thought THAT was huge! So thanks again for joining me on this silly journey, more to come soon!


	20. If Walls Could Talk, They'd Say "Ow!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to save your personal galaxy, Ben!  
> A time jump five months after returning home explores the life of the trio during that period. Ben discovers a line in a report that changes everything.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're going to have time jumps from this point forward as the trio's lives unfold. Also, a little steamship has just rolled in...
> 
> PS some medical/scientific stuff will be discussed, and I am in NO way an expert on the topic, so if anything isn't correct or possible, remember this is Star Wars, not PBS.

_Five months later…_

Ben lifted his head from his arms, wondering how long he had been asleep at his desk. He checked his comm and groaned. Well, he paid for that all-nighter.

He opened a drawer and pulled out one of the dozens of Hyper-Fuel bottles and a SOLO-Gear Survival Snack Bar. His mother would have given him the stare of disapproval if she knew that was the entirety of his lunch, but she was busy shopping with Rey.

Besides, he had no time for lunch.

He projected the latest simulation reports, digging through to find the scenario most likely for success. In the past five months, he and his Research and Development team had been diligently working on a medical device that could correct a genetic anomaly. The new expert team in genetics he hired had provided substantial background on the topic, the Sith cloning data provided an entirely new angle that solved mysteries the medical teams were thus far unable to answer, and the nanotech device he engineered was ready to deploy once it had the correct programming data to alter and repair the DNA strands. It was this part that had him and R&D stumped for the past month. They currently had no successful simulation.

They were so damn close, he could feel it.

In that time, besides the DNA work, SOLO Corp released a new line of products of which that snack bar was just one small offering. His Marketing department was a team of geniuses. He loved the new campaign: SOLO-Gear—When You Need to be a Hero. The logo was an image of him in his belts full of gear surfing the SOLO-Gear text, boot rockets aflame, SOLO-Chute flowing behind. The ads featured footage from the battle on Exegol, and once he saw the sales, he nearly fell out of his chair. They couldn’t keep the products on the shelves! He wondered how many people really needed to be a hero out there, but was honestly too busy to search the holonet and find out. That’s what he paid people to do.

This DNA project was all that mattered. The lives they could save from this invention would be immeasurable, suffering due to defects eliminated. If ever he was to make his mark on the galaxy, this would be it for sure.

The prospects had especially excited Kylo as he translated the Sith books and holocrons. Despite having defeated Palpatine and helped the Resistance take down the Final Order, Kylo was always laid with guilt for the lives he took while forced to be a warlord. That he could save billions of lives simply by helping this project was another step in his atonement. Never mind that he himself was on borrowed time.

Success in this project would mean he and Rey could have a full life.

Speaking of, Ben could feel her proximity as well as his mother’s, the two returning from their shopping trip. Ben always quashed down his grin whenever Leia would ask to go, knowing it wasn’t a high priority on Rey’s enjoyment list. Regardless, she went, taking the place of the daughter Leia never had, and endured being fawned over.

He couldn’t wait to see what Leia bought Rey this time.

For a space pirate, Rey took it all with grace and understanding, letting Leia buy her frilly, sparkling bows, skirts, and dresses Rey would never wear outside the house. If Leia was cooking, Rey was gracious enough to wear a bow or some eye-blinding sparkling getup to make her future mother-in-law happy. In Ben’s opinion, she looked adorable, and he received more than a few threats when he couldn’t stop grinning over dinner. Kylo, knowing how out of character it was for Rey to wear such things, laughed once.

Once.

When he regained consciousness, he vowed never to make that mistake again.

Ben lifted his eyes to the windows and could see movement in the house. Having his lab and office detached from the mansion but connected by a corridor gave everyone a sense of peace. No one worried about the house being blown up, and Ben never worried about having to go out in the sun when he wasn’t forced to.

And here came Rey down the connecting corridor, a sack of items bouncing behind her back. His mother went overboard yet again.

_Safe to come in?_

Ben loved that Rey always asked, not because he expected her to, but because she understood that not only did he startle easily and could blow something up, but sometimes he was just in a concentration zone and needed to remain there. Her respect for his work made him love her even more with every passing day. _Indeed, my love._

The door slid open and Rey sauntered in. She tossed the items on a chair and plopped into one across from his desk. “Whew! When your mother wants to shop, she turns it into an event.” She tipped her head back and just sunk into the chair.

Ben laced his fingers and rested his chin on them. “Looks like you two had some fun there.” He read her body and felt her along the Force. “You okay?”

Rey picked her head back up. “Just a little tired. Long day. Plus I think the class took a little out of me. Glad that’s done for now.”

Rey had been teaching pop-up Force classes, running for a week or two at a time, specifically aimed at Force-sensitives who did not ascribe primarily to Darkness or Light. Luke had made a face when they told him, and that fact that Rey continued to run it showed just how much of his opinion she took under consideration. Despite his uncle’s grumblings, the brief classes were very popular. Kylo was her usual punching bag/assistant, and Ben joined in whenever she needed someone else with superior Force capability.

But all that usage of her power came at a price, which is why she only did it for a week or two at a time and took a few weeks off in between.

Ben nodded. “We’ll have a dyad session tonight. I’m sure Kylo’s due for a recharge.”

Rey brushed him off. “I’ll be fine.”

Ben tipped his head forward. “Don’t ‘I’ll be fine’ me, my luscious beauty. I’m sure we all could use a boost, and you know it doesn’t hurt me any to do it.” He pounded the desk with his fist. “Lord Ben has spoken!”

Rey’s head lolled to the side, highly unimpressed. Then she waved him off. “As you wish, my mighty prince.”

“Ahhh, tempting me with the sexy talk, eh? You naughty, naughty girl. Speaking of, what did you buy?”

“Look what I got Kylo.” She held up a Caverns and Rancors T-shirt with a warrior punching an orc.

“Oh wow, that’s perfect! He’s gonna love that.”

“I couldn’t resist when I saw it. I can’t believe he’s still hates orcs ever since that first game we played. I mean he really hates them.”

“Well, you know Kylo. At least he’s narrowed down his hatred and fury to imaginary figures.”

“Seriously. Mom got him a bunch of clothes. She’s even trying a green shirt, just to see if he’ll wear anything but red and black.”

“Hm, that will be an interesting experiment. Now—” Ben bounced in his seat. “What’d you buy me? What’d you buy me?”

Rey pulled a dark blue shirt out of the shopping sack and shook it out. “Your mom got you this and one in a lighter color—” She held her hand up. “I made sure she didn’t go too light, I know how easily you stain shirts.”

“You know me so well.”

“It’s purely natural _shver_ fiber, super soft and breathable, and look, the tags are printed right on the fabric. No itchies.”

Ben sighed and rested his chin on his hand. “I love it.”

“I picked out these pajamas for you, again, natural fiber, breathable, and no tags.” She held up a shirt and pants covered in TIE Fighters and red lightsabers.

Ben gave a scrunchy smile and kicked his feet. “Perfect!”

The next shirt she held to her chest. “ _I_ got you this when your mother wasn’t looking.” It was a T-shirt that had DARTH FUCKING VADER on three separate lines.

Ben clenched his fists and thrust them up in glory. “YES!”

“Alsoooo…”

“Also whaaaat?”

Rey stuffed her hand in a small sack and tossed a handful of polyhedral dice on the desk. Once they hit the hard surface, they lit up in blue. Ben sucked in a massive gasp and gathered them in his hand. Rey giggled. “Just released. I got you those, Kylo red, and me yellow.”

Ben rolled them in his hand, sighing in delight. “Oh we are soooo gaming soon.” He gathered them to his chest and smiled at her. “I love them. Thank you.” He set them down, sat back in his seat and folded his hands. “Now, what did you _really_ get me?”

Rey sighed, smiled, and stood. “I’ll go try them on.” She slipped out to the side room where Ben napped if he remembered to actually get over there.

While she was gone, Ben returned to the reports. After dozens of lines of data, Rey stepped out in white C-leather capris and a matching halter top with rivets and grommets galore. Ben stroked his chin. “Mm hmmmm, turn around.” That C-leather hugged her rear with perfection. “Oh yeah, that’s nice. Let me get a sample.”

Rey strolled over to him and arched her rear in his direction. Ben slid his hand along the hugging fabric over her curves and it was just as delightful as he imagined. “Do the thing.”

Rey grinned as she stepped back a little, stuck one hip out, and drew her guns. Ben flopped back in his seat and moaned in delight. “Mmm, I like that one. What else?”

She winked. “Be right back.”

Ben continued through the report until she returned. He loved shopping day. First, Rey and Leia always got him everything he needed, so he didn’t have to go himself and deal with all the people, overwhelming smells and lights, and massive indecision. Besides, they never went to the electronics store, so what was the point? Second, he got to see his gorgeous girlfriend pose in all her new outfits, and every single one, even the frilly, sparkly, lacy ones that shouldn’t belong on a space pirate, made him just want to yank her into that bedroom and forget reports for a few hours.

She went through a few outfits, each more tantalizing than the last. When she got to a T-shirt and pajama pants, he wanted to bury himself in her even more. At that point he had to accept the fact that he was just plain horny.

“I like this,” he said as he pulled her onto his lap. She was so soft and cuddly in that lounging outfit. He pecked at her neck and the tiny spot of bare shoulder. “Makes me want to just snuggle under the blankets and nuzzle you all day long.”

“Really? Just nuzzle?”

Ben sunk his fingers into her hair. “Nuzzle all day, devour you all night.”

“I like that plan.” She kissed him long, slow, and soft, as if time had no meaning and they could spend eternity doing just this. She slipped from his lips to trail her kisses over his cheeks, ending at the tip of his nose. “I have one more thing. A dress. I don’t know, it’s really not me, but your mom said you’d like it and insisted on buying it.”

Ben smiled. “You’re so kind to her, even if she probably drives you batty with this stuff.”

“I love her. She’s the best, treating me like…” Rey swallowed and quirked a brief smile. “I miss my mom, but Leia has really stepped up into that role for me in ways I could never repay her for. So I let her dress me in all this girly stuff, who cares, right? If only I could convince her to go to the gun store with me. That’s a hard sell right there, surprising for someone who’s still a damn good shot.” 

“Tell you what. Tomorrow, I’ll take half a day, and we’ll go to any gun store you want. We’ll go to _all_ the gun stores!”

“Ohhhh, I love it when you talk sexy to me.” She sunk one of her incredible kisses into him once more, making him forget his own name.

After that taste of heaven, he brushed his thumb across her lips. “So, you gonna show me this pretty little dress or what?”

Rey kissed his forehead. “I’ll be right back.”

She dashed off into the side room and Ben just stared off into nothing once she slipped inside. It was so incredible to see this version of Rey, the one she kept behind closed doors. Once away from the world, the duties, the dangers, she was so soft and vulnerable, enjoying the little things that had been denied her all her life.

And when she needed to exercise her thrill-seeking side, Han and Chewbacca took her and Kylo on their little missions. The four of them always came back exhilarated, and Ben was glad for it. It was a world he would never quite understand, but his thrills lay in the lab. Han always asked Ben to go with them, out of kindness and respect, but both knew it would rarely happen. Ben had his work taking up most of his time, and Han now had Rey and Kylo who were far more suited for these journeys.

And honestly, Ben liked it just fine that way. Kylo and Rey filled a void for Han, leaving his relationship with Ben to grow in a healthier direction. Ben no longer felt like he had to live up to a version of himself he could never be.

And Kylo loved using all of Ben’s gags and gadgets on the missions.

Rey came strolling out and if Ben was holding anything, it would have hit the floor. “Ho-ly shit, Rey.” Strapless, sides and back bare, in his favorite shade of dark blue with beaded fringes dangling from the arcs of the cups over her delicious breasts. She was a walking goddess.

She turned and swayed her hips. “You like it? I’m not used to wearing something so dark, but your mom said I just had to get it for you.”

Ben nodded vehemently with his mouth draped open. “Oh my mother knows me well. Oh my—you have no idea what I’m thinking of doing to you right now.”

She gave him her scrunchy-nosed smile that made his toes curl in delight. “Really?”

“This is definitely the best one yet—wait! Aren’t you missing something?”

Rey snorted. “Your mom made me promise to try it on like this first.”

Ben whipped his head back and forth. “No-no-no! I want to see all of it. All of you.”

Ah, that precious smile of pure love knowing how much he understood her. “I’ll be right back.”

Ben adjusted himself while waiting and spoke to his crotch. “You just sit tight in there. We’ll have her try them all on later again when we have more time for you, got it?”

Rey sauntered out once more, her gun-belt around her hips, lightsaber hanging from the side. Ben nodded and stroked his stubble. “Yeahhhh, that’s it. That’s perfect.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Do the thing.”

Rey, in a blur, drew her guns. Ben draped backwards in his seat and moaned in delight.

Rey cocked her head to the side. “Me and the crew are taking over this lab, science-boy.”

Ben’s little friend in his pants wasn’t interested in waiting until later. “Oh no, not the lab! In the name of science, I won’t let you!”

She stepped over, put one foot up on the chair between his legs and kept her guns aimed. “Do I look like I’m giving you a choice?”

Ben’s chest rose and fell with his deep breaths. “Maybe…there’s something else I can give you instead.” He winked.

Rey holstered her guns and straddled him. “Maybe there is…”

Ben ran his hands along the silky fabric up to the velvet top covering her breasts. She dipped down to destroy him with one of her deepest kisses while his hands roamed her nearly bare back. Okay, no time for reports. He slid his hands over the silkiness of her rounded bottom, then pushed the dress up and felt nothing but bareness beneath.

He wiggled out of the kiss and grinned. “You, my lady, are not wearing any underwear.”

“Damn right I’m not.” She unbuckled his pants and set him free. Looks like his little friend would have some early fun after all.

She slipped right onto him, and damn he loved having his own office at home. Even as he was fully engulfed in the deepest pleasure of her sweet softness, his mind drifted back to the time when he lived in the basement. If he had told _that_ Ben a woman like Rey would be riding him at his desk in his office at his mansion, his past self would have laughed himself silly while snorting then fainted once the visual got in his head.

This Ben had shoved everything off his desk multiple times in the past five months and indulged in the sweet, sweet delight of his sexy little space pirate. Sometimes they made it to the bed in the other room, and sometimes they just defiled his chair like now.

Except for the endless work on the project and the underlying fear of losing her, the past five months had been the best he’d ever had!

He stroked her with his thumb while she rode him with abandon, whipping her hair back, her tender body bucking with the rhythmic movements. After a good few weeks, he finally could last an entire session without losing himself in minutes. Her fingers laced into his hair, and she pulled his head back, one of her sexy little power plays.

“You better take me all the way, science-boy.”

He moved his thumb faster. “Does this satisfy you, oh mighty and vicious space pirate?”

“Faster.” She darted down and sunk her teeth into his neck. He growled with an intoxicating mix of pain and pleasure. Damn he loved it when she did that. She followed that up by gnawing the length of his neck, up to his jawline, nipping at his ear.

“Rey, please tell me you’re—”

“Keep going. Take me all the way.”

That was going to be a brief path because those bites just pushed him over the edge. But she buried her face in his neck, and he could feel her tensing right before her beautiful cries sent him right into oblivion. He clutched her body against his and roared into that heavy wave of completion.

Spent but delighted, he tipped his head back with a soft smile. Rey’s grinning face hovered over him, and she pecked soft petal kisses all over his face.

Making no effort to get off of him, she folded her hands and rested them on his chest. “Should I tell your mother you like the dress?”

“Tell her I fucking _love_ the dress.”

He kissed her lips. And again. And again. He had asked her to live with him, get an idea of what it was to be with him constantly before she made any real decision to stay with him forever. He hoped, really hoped he hadn’t been too obnoxious. This life he had now? He wanted this for an eternity.

All the more reason he had to get back to work.

“Kylo will be home soon,” he said softly against her lips.

Rey snorted. “He’s like the giant child we didn’t have. Us having to scramble and get ourselves put together before he gets home from school.” She ran her fingers through his hair once more, stroking his scalp in that special way of hers that not only turned off the world but once had saved his life. “I’ll let you get back to work.”

“You sure I don’t work too hard for your tastes?”

She kissed his lips once more. “I know this _is_ for me. Do what you have to do. I’ll be waiting in our wing.”

#

Ben continued to scroll through the endless results of the report when he heard the stomping of his giant brother. Whether Kylo was angry, sad, or thrilled, he always stomped, so Ben could never tell what awaited him when that door opened.

He heard a clunk and the door to his office slid open. “Hey Kylo, how was school today?”

Kylo paced like a wild animal waiting to strike at its captors. “Okay.”

“How about that math test? How’d you do?”

Kylo snarled and grabbed his hair. “I hate math! Numbers suck!” He slammed his fist through the wall, then dropped his shoulders in frustration. “Damnit, I did it again.”

Ben tipped his head forward. “Kylo…”

His brother wrapped his arm over his eyes and growled at the ceiling. “Walls are not for hitting. Use my words, not my fists.”

“That’s right.” Ben kept a compassionate smile. With a few months of therapy, Kylo punched a lot fewer walls, but he still struggled. At least he kept it contained until he got home where two strong Force-sensitives could wrangle him if he got out of control. That he was able to keep his anger at bay for all those hours after a lifetime of being taught the opposite was a testament to how strong the young man was becoming.

Kylo hung his head. “I’ll fix it.”

Ben smiled. “I think we’re all out of patching material. We’ll whip some up tomorrow.”

Kylo pressed his palm against his forehead. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. You’re trying, I know you are. You want a cookie?”

Kylo’s eyes lit up. “Yes please.”

Ben floated one over on the Force, and Kylo immediately calmed to nibble on it. “Now, why are you so upset?”

Kylo plopped into a chair. “I failed.”

“Well what was your score?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Send it to me, let me see.”

Kylo shoved out a short growl and pawed at his comm.

Ben read the results and gasped, incredulous. “Kylo! It’s a 95! You didn’t fail, not even close!”

“I didn’t get a hundred!”

“That’s okay! Kylo, you don’t have to be perfect, you know that.”

“I know! I just get so…anxious when I’m not. Scared. Those are the words, right? Just…waiting for what comes next.”

“I know. It’s hard for you, and you’re doing so much better. You’re even using the right words! Just keep reminding yourself it’s okay to not be perfect. And it’s only been five months, you’re going to school for the first time. Be proud of all you accomplished.”

Kylo shifted. “It’s not bad?”

“Not at all. It’s excellent. I said you were smart. Just because you didn’t have the same opportunities as I did doesn’t mean you’re not smart.”

Kylo smiled. “Okay. I feel better.” The burden in his eyes lifted as he munched on the cookie.

Ben always held endless compassion for his little brother. At one time the entire galaxy hated Ben, and now here was a broken young man who idolized him, wanted to be like him. Whenever Ben muttered and stared at a formula, Kylo was there watching with astute eyes, hoping he could pick up what was going on. He assisted Ben on so many experiments, his eyes wide with wonder, laughing and excited at the end result. Whenever Ben showed Kylo something new, whether it was describing the elements in a mineral, getting a new droid online, or programming a quick game, Kylo threw himself into it, trying to memorize things he barely understood, wanting so badly to know a world he’d been denied.

Ben opened worlds for Kylo, but Ben also loved sharing his knowledge with someone so enthusiastic. The two brothers filled each other in ways Ben never would have been able to conceive before.

Ben continued sorting through the report. “So, any news on the dating front?”

Kylo groaned and massaged his forehead with his palm. “I’m not ready. Think I’ll just stick to Melanie for now.”

“Well, maybe consider trying a real person some day. I’m sure there’s plenty of people out there who would love a damaged, dark prince. According to 90% of the smutty Galaxy Wars fanfiction out there, it’s a guarantee!”

Kylo rubbed his palm against the table. “I don’t want to hurt anyone. I have to get my anger under control. It’s so hard.”

“I know it is, but you’ve made a lot of progress. At least now it’s just an occasional hole in the wall based on an actual situation. You’re not pacing around destroying your room without knowing why.”

He shrugged. “I guess.”

“Well it takes incredible insight to be able to see you have a problem and want to do the right thing. Proud of you, buddy.”

“Really?” Kylo smiled. “Thank you. I think the drama therapy’s been helping. I remember my therapist saying with me being so physical, it would be good for me to help me channel my feelings into healthy behaviors. I think I’ve been doing best since starting it. Maybe I’ll even take up acting at school, I don’t know. Is that okay?”

“Of course, why wouldn’t it be?”

Kylo shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s not science or math or anything.”

“Kylo, this is _your_ life. You do what _you_ want with it.”

“Just thought maybe…you wouldn’t want me to do that.”

“What I want is for you to be happy. You spent most of your life miserable. This is your time to make a life that’s yours. If it excites you, do it. We don’t always have to be into the same things. It’s okay.”

Kylo was back to smiling. “Okay. Oh! I want to show you something.” Kylo sprinted out of the office and returned with a large, flat item. “My therapist also said that art would help me channel my anger.” Onto the table, he hoisted a canvas covered in colorful handprints and spatters. “This is what I made in art therapy.”

Ben stood with a drop-jaw smile. “You made this? It’s beautiful. So much passion and so vibrant.”

Kylo bore a wide grin. “You like it? I call it, ‘I’m Angry at Blank Canvases!’ That’s why there’s so much red. I kept smacking and pounding on the canvas with paint in my hands.” He chuckled. “That felt good. Maybe it shows too much of my anger though.”

“But on top of the red are all these other colors, blues and greens, bright yellow. Seems like once you channeled your anger, you were able to express the rest of what’s in your heart. This is a perfect expression of you, Kylo. Even when you make mistakes like punching the wall, you always try to do better and fix it.” Ben put his hand on Kylo’s shoulder. “I’m so proud of you. You’re really working hard on yourself and getting better every day.”

Kylo smiled and nudged his head toward Ben, a sign of affection that was solely reserved for the older brother. “I want you to have it.”

“This is for me?”

Kylo nodded in pride. “I’m only here because of you. That’s what all the blue is, because you help make the anger disappear. And the yellow is Rey. She kicks my ass if I get out of line. The green is Mom because she likes to garden. Mom’s always taking care of me. She’s so good to me. This brown is for Uncle Chewy and the lighter one is for Dad. I gave him a whiskey color.”

Ben snorted into a laugh. “That’s Dad alright. Kylo this is…it’s incredible. I love it.” He squeezed his brother’s shoulder. “Thank you. It will remind me every day, no matter how hard things get, I have real impact in the world, that I make a difference.”

Kylo shrugged. “You did save the galaxy, too. There’s that.”

Ben leaned toward him. “ _We_ , _we_ saved the galaxy.” He eyed the painting. “I know the perfect spot.” He activated the Versa-clips along the top corners to allow the canvas to stick to the wall and placed it over the punched hole. “There. Our progress is more important than our mistakes.”

Kylo stood beside him, fingertips in his pockets. “I like that.” He rubbed his forehead again.

Ben sat before his report again but kept his eyes on his brother. “You’re rubbing your head a lot. Any headaches today?”

Kylo shrugged. “A little. Medtech helped. Think it’s the stress from the test.”

Ben sorted through more lines of data, always able to run multiple processes in his head at once. “I think you and Rey are due for a charging. Tonight after I finish looking this over, we should have a dyad session.”

“Glad it still helps even if I’m not part of the dyad anymore. I don’t know what I’d do without you two helping me.” He tugged at his hair. “Not sure if I’d still be here.”

Ben looked at him over his report. “Well you _do_ have us, and we’re trying…I’m trying…”

Five months of perpetual study, tests, experiments, and endless data. Ben felt like maybe they were getting close to a breakthrough on treating Rey and Kylo’s condition, but it always seemed to elude them. He could keep them going, at least. The sessions energized him as much as them, and it came at no cost but time, and time could be bought with Hyper-Fuel.

A portion of data caught his eye. He expanded it and checked the results of the simulation. His body sparkled with adrenaline as he stood, unable to remain in a seat if what he was seeing was true.

Kylo tilted his head. “Ben?”

He could hardly speak. “We…we found it.”

Kylo leapt to his feet. “The cure?”

Ben was still trying to get his lips to work. “P-preliminary, it’s preliminary, but this is the scenario. This it, this one, right here!” He tapped at his comm wishing his fingers would work right. “Torbin! Simulation 44116! That’s it! That’s the one!”

A voice came back on the comm. “Are you sure? We’ve had false positives before.”

“Never been sure of anything more in my life. I’m coming in right now.”

“Dr. Solo, most of the research team has gone home for the day.”

“Well call them and tell them we found it. Whoever wants to come in after hours gets double time. I can’t sit on this.”

“Alright Dr. Solo, I’ll see what I can do.”

Ben hung up the call and pointed to his brother. “Kylo! Pack your boredom bag. We’re going to the office.”

Kylo raised a finger. “Can I eat a parachute when I’m there?”

Ben pulled him into a hug. “You can eat all the parachutes you want, little brother. Let me go get Rey.”

Ben bounded down the corridor leading back to the mansion and burst through the door, slamming right into Han and his cup of whiskey.

“Damnit boy!” Han growled. “You can kick Palpatine’s ass but can’t watch where you’re going?”

“No time! Rey! REYYYY!”

Leia bounded out of the kitchen. “Ben, what’s going on?”

Ben yelled back as he flew up the stairs, not wanting to wait for the elevator. “We found it, Mom! REYYY!”

Rey slid out of their bedroom, disheveled and a bit tired, with her lightsaber in hand and guns at the ready. “Ben, what the hell’s happening?”

He stopped and grasped her shoulders. “Rey, I have to go to the office. It’s going to be a three Hyper-Fuel night.”

Rey sighed. “You’re going to start having migraines again—”

Ben stood his ground, staring at her with wide, bright eyes. “Rey, I have to go. I found it.”

Rey blinked. “Found it?”

“We finally isolated the protocol that works. Rey…this is it.”

She stood there staring. Tears almost made it to her eyes, but she was so self-protective, she shut it down. She wasn’t yet ready to believe, but badly, so badly he knew she wanted to. She smiled. “Well then you go get’em, you sexy beast.”

Ben broke into a smile and picked her up in his arms, spinning her. “Come with me, you and Kylo. You two are the inspiration for this all, and I want you there.” He sunk his fingers in her hair and let the silken strands fall between his fingers. “Besides, the two of you need a boost, and they’ll force me to eat and take a break, eventually. Not quite the night we had in mind, but I want you both with me. This is for us.”

She kissed him and for once real hope blossomed in his chest. “I’ll go grab some things.”

#

Rey stood at the viewing platform overlooking the clean room at SOLO Corp’s Research and Development lab. Ben had warned her that living with him wouldn’t be easy, that he’d be annoying and get so obsessed with his work he’d forget to eat and sleep. Now, after five months of experiencing Ben daily, Rey had made a firm decision.

She loved him exactly as he was.

Watching him work was its own poetry. Clad in protective gear, he was the biggest one in the room, moving the fastest, a frantic pace, so incredibly determined. He had an energy unmatched when he was working, and she just adored watching him, how those dark eyes would be so bright as they flitted about formulas, lashes blinking, that soft mouth moving constantly as he voiced the calculations and questions in his head. His huge hands were always running through his long hair, usually when he was frustrated by an error in a formula. Sometimes he’d shave and sometimes he’d forget for days on end, and he looked so beautiful either way.

Rey didn’t like having hope. It was one step toward disappointment. But she wasn’t about to let that on when he was so excited and driven, like nothing could or would stop him. She certainly wouldn’t. Whether or not this worked, the one thing she knew was that she wanted to be with him for whatever time she had.

His pickiness and whining only made her roll her eyes or give him a look that made him shrink off, but he always ended it with a knowing smile. He had insight enough to know when he was being obnoxious and thanked her for tolerating as much as she did.

Honestly, she didn’t feel like she had to endure anything. Despite his fears that she wouldn’t be able to stand him for long, she only grew more enamored.

He really had no idea how many beautiful facets he had, only seeing his own flaws.

So blinded by working on the cure for her and Kylo, he became oblivious to a lot of what went on in the galaxy. All that existed was his family. When Rey wanted his attention, he dropped everything for her. When Kylo needed him, he was there with complete focus. His mother, of course. His father…well, that was its own story. Not much changed there, and they left Rey and Kylo laughing their heads off at more than a few meals in the house.

But outside of that? Ben had no idea how much had changed, but she saw it. All those awful sites like IHateBenSolo.galaxy were shut down. That horrible ad? Gone. A search for Ben Solo brought up fan pages, pictures with hearts on them, honors and gratitude. Hell, even she and Kylo were pretty popular.

And Ben had absolutely no clue, nor did he seem to want to. Everything was poured into them.

Kylo counted to his fiftieth clapping-pushup and sprung to his feet, hair a drenched mess. He stepped beside her while rubbing a towel over his head and peered down at the work below. “I wish I could do stuff like that with him.”

Rey shrugged. “You do a lot with him. This is really high tech work. One false move could screw it all up, and you don’t have the training these people do.”

Kylo fingered the glass. “I wish I was smart like that. He says I’m smart, but I don’t know.”

Rey playfully shoved him. “You’re smart. Your life is just beginning, give yourself time. Besides, life may have other things for you. Not all of us are destined to be ultra-nerds.”

Kylo nudged his forehead against the glass. “I bet I would be like him if everything hadn’t happened to me. I hate who I wound up becoming instead.”

“Hey.” Rey nodded toward Ben down below. “He doesn’t. He loves you exactly as you are. So be you, huh? You’re so much more than you give yourself credit for.”

Kylo glanced at her and rubbed his head against the glass. “Think so?”

“I do.” Rey smiled and punched him lightly in the arm.

Rey kept to herself some of what she suspected. Kylo’s early physical and mental abuse may very well have altered a lot of his brain pathways, making what would come easy to Ben very hard for Kylo, even if they were clones and each had the same starting capability. Rey also didn’t doubt that whatever fusion happened that left those scars and caused those headaches played a part in it all. She didn’t want to tell him he’d probably never wind up at the same capacity as Ben. All she could do was keep him from beating himself up for not reaching that incredibly high bar.

He had come so far in such a short time, all things considered, but it hadn’t been easy—on anyone. Kylo’s heart was always in the right place, but his head was a warzone, and it had been difficult getting him used to a normal life.

Less than a month into coming home from the battle and moving into the mansion, Kylo had a bad moment.

The worst part about it was how much it hurt Kylo in the aftermath. When Ben bought the mansion, Kylo got a bedroom that was more like an apartment. Rey had never seen him so happy as he plopped onto his fluffy bed full of pillows, marveled at the big tub for his giant body to take a hot bath, and let the wind blow through his hair on the balcony that overlooked Leia’s huge gardens and the pool (equipped with appropriate shading for Ben’s sun aversion.)

Happiness was wonderful, but it wasn’t a cure for Kylo’s episodic rage with its hair trigger in a world he did not yet understand.

_Four months earlier…_

Rey was cleaning her guns when she sensed a surge of Darkness and heard the rage screams.

 _Rey?_ Ben sent her from the detached lab. _Do you feel that?_

_Kylo!_

She dashed out of her massive bedroom that could have hosted her entire pirate ship and sped down the hallway. Inside his room, Kylo was losing his ever-loving shit, destroying everything with his lightsaber. She flung him into the air and held him there while he screamed obscenities and tried to break out of her grasp.

“LET ME FUCKING GO!” he screamed, wrenching and growling.

“You need to calm the fuck down first. Let go of the lightsaber. Let it go NOW!”

He glared and resisted, then screeched as he opened his hand. Rey drew it to herself and hooked it on her belt.

“Fuck’s the matter with you?”

Kylo growled into a scream, wrenching so hard against her hold she thought he might actually hurt himself. But she let him do it, because whatever it was, it needed to get out of his system.

Ben slid in, panting, and looked around. “Oh what the fuck, Kylo?!”

Kylo clamped his eyes shut and just breathed while biting his lower lip.

Ben touched Rey’s shoulder. “It’s okay, let him go. Let me talk to him.”

Rey set him down on his feet. Kylo paced in circles, palm pressed to his head, panting into growls, trying to wrest some control over himself.

Ben stood just outside the circle. “Kylo, buddy, what’s going on? Talk to me. You know you’re safe here. You can tell me anything.”

Kylo slowed his pacing and just stood there, hand gripping his hair, pulling like he was trying to rip his own head off. Then he let it go with a hefty breath and opened his eyes, still panting. He looked at the both of them like was just starting to recognize them. Then his eyes scanned the room. Horror filled them in realization of what he’d done. He balled his fists, pressed them against the sides of his head, and screamed in anguish.

“Kylo!” Ben said, grasping his brother’s shoulders. To his credit, Ben never showed an ounce of fear, just concern.

Kylo crumpled to his knees in tears. Ben knelt and pulled him into his arms, brushing his hand over Kylo’s head. “It’s okay, Kylo. It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry,” Kylo choked out.

“It’s okay. Shhhh, it’s okay.”

“I destroyed everything! What did I do?!”

“Shhhhh.” Ben rocked him in his arms. “We’ll fix it, okay? We’ll fix it all.”

“You gave me everything and I…I…” He sobbed into his brother’s chest.

“It’s just things. Things can be replaced. I’m just worried about you. You’re all that matters.”

Kylo wrapped his arms around Ben’s stomach and squeezed as he wailed, one of the very few times he allowed himself to cry in front of others. And Ben? Nothing but endless patience and concern.

Ben had been worried his perpetual work habits and irritating neediness would drive Rey away. As Rey recalled that moment, she shook her head at how ridiculous that idea was. Ben’s heart is what she loved, and that obfuscated anything else.

Ben could have had a crew come in and fix everything. Instead, he sat with Kylo and showed him how to look up fixing it himself, worked with him to make repair cement and paint out of the chemistry set, and what couldn’t be patched, Ben showed him how to purchase new items. He needed Kylo to know that he could fix things, even when it seemed overwhelming.

The next day, Ben had a new building added to the property and had all kinds of junk and old ship parts put into it and Vader polymer walls. This would be Kylo’s designated rage room where he could let out all that pressure inside. Ben never scolded Kylo once, only showed him incredible understanding and praised him for having the strength to wait until he came home to express his fury.

And that was why, even if she spent hours just staring at him work, she wanted no other life.

Ben wasn’t just the shining light of the galaxy in a desperate life or death moment. He lived it every day.

And even now, amid a mad dash to develop a breakthrough in medical technology, he looked up at her from beneath his clear mask and gave a wave, eyes precious little crescents in his huge smile.

This life, with him, was the only one she wanted.

#

Two more months of testing brought forth the item in Ben’s hands that he showed Kylo and Rey. “So the device stays on your body for the entire duration of treatment and essentially cuts the incorrect DNA out of cells, provides the correct sequence, and stitches the cell back up, like surgery for cells. So far the tests have been viable with no known side effects, but we haven’t gone into full clinical trials yet—”

“I’ll do it,” Kylo said.

Ben sighed. “Kylo, I’m just showing it to you for now, I’d rather wait until the clinical trials—”

“Then I’ll be a clinical trial.”

Ben shook his head. “No, Kylo—look, I said the tests have been viable and there are no _known_ side effects, but Kylo—you’re my brother, I can’t risk you if anything goes wrong—”

“Ben, I’m already wrong!”

“No you’re not! Not—not—damnit Kylo, I can’t let you be the first human test of this!”

Rey shrugged. “Then I’ll do it—”

Before Ben could object, it was Kylo who shouted, “NO! If anyone’s going to be at risk, it will be me. End of story!” He continued to stare at her with such incredible intensity. Kylo was a warrior at heart, and he’d always throw himself on the front lines of a battle. And he still really cared about Rey.

Ben needed to deescalate before Kylo started destroying shit. “I totally get how you feel, Kylo. This is just groundbreaking medical technology, and we don’t yet know all the factors.” He put his hand on Kylo’s shoulder. “I don’t want anyone to be hurt by something I made, and I especially couldn’t live with myself if I saw it happen to you.”

Kylo crossed his arms, hardened warrior through and through. “Are all the calculations correct?”

Ben scoffed. “Uh, yeah!”

“Is your team the best credits can pay for?”

“Considering how loudly Torbin screamed at me when she saw the company financials last month, yes.”

“If you had a deadly genetic problem, would you use this?”

“Of course! The amount of expertise and design that went into this—hey wait a minute!”

Kylo grinned. “Then it’s settled. Ben, I want this.”

“Kylo—”

“I know you can keep me going, keep us going.” Kylo shook his head. “But Ben, I don’t want to live with a question mark hanging over my life all the time. I hate wondering _if_ I have a future. And I don’t want to have to rely on you just to survive. Ben, please. I want this more than anything.” He glanced at Rey. “Work out the problems with me, so when it’s her turn, neither of you have to worry.” He shrugged. “I’m sure whatever happens, it can’t be worse than what I’ve already been through in my life.”

Ben let out a breath, hung his head, then clasped Kylo behind the neck with a smile. “Okay. We’ll go before the team tomorrow and if they agree, we’ll start.” He pulled his brother into a hug. “You’ll always be the biggest hero, you know that?”

Kylo hugged back with none of the awkwardness that was paramount during those early days. “I learned from the best.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This and the next few chapters will probably be shorter as I broke the giant one into more manageable pieces. While this isn't the most hilarious of chapters, I wanted to focus on who they were outside of a life-or-death mission, just trying to live some semblance of a normal life. The next two will be more amusing!
> 
> I wavered whether or not to throw in the scene of Kylo losing his mind and destroying his room, because in some ways it really didn't fit the larger scene (except in Rey thinking about how Ben handled it and it being one more example of how wonderful he is.) I decided to keep it because Kylo's healing from 20 years of abuse would not be fast or easy, even with the most understanding people around him. 
> 
> So in reality, in our galaxy, medical breakthroughs like this would have taken years to become viable. I have a reason for keeping this timeframe as short as it is for the chapters coming up, so let's just assume in this galaxy far far away medical tech advances much faster than here. 
> 
> I based the device on info I read regarding gene editing, where they use programmable viruses or nanoparticles to do essentially the same thing. Again, I am in no way an expert on this, but it is a really fascinating field (author is a nerd who read medical encyclopedias for fun as a kid.) 
> 
> More coming soon!


	21. Not TIEs, Ties!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is your moment, Ben!  
> Ben tries not to panic the night of the Galactic Scientific Symposium.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to keep the potentially boring science-y talk to a minimum, but also wanted to have a certain realistic edge to this, so hopefully those parts won't be too dull. Again, while this is partially based on the real science behind gene editing, I'm in no way a doctor or medical researcher. My profession is in writing superheroes, space wizards, and robots knocking boots, so yeah... Anyway, on with the chapter!

_Three months later…_

“Mommyyyyyy!” Ben cried as he dashed through the mansion. “My tie! Fix my tie!”

Leia, dressed in her finery, sighed and grasped his bowtie. “If you’d stop fiddling with it, you wouldn’t have to keep fixing it.”

“It was crooked!”

“Because you keep playing with it! Now hold still, you’re ridiculous already.”

“I can’t hold still! I can’t do this.” He shook his head back and forth. “Nope, done, out. I can’t do this.” He tried to run but Leia yanked him back on the Force.

“You, sir, are going to do this. You will get up there, and you will speak, and you will be incredible, and you will _stop fiddling with your tie!_ ”

Kylo lounged on the living room couch with his hands behind his head, black suit, black tie, black shirt in contrast to Ben’s white shirt. Otherwise they would have looked identical. “I don’t know why you’re getting so frantic. You were less afraid facing Palpatine.”

Ben flung his arms out. “Well I wasn’t being _watched_ by my peers and everyone in the scientific community when that happened! I could just see the headlines now: Ben Solo makes a complete jackass of himself onstage at the Galactic Scientific Symposium. Ben Solo faints onstage. Ben Solo is the complete loser we all knew he was from the beginning.”

Leia stuck her finger in his face. “You stop that right now! You are not nor have you ever been a loser!”

Ben flinched at being scolded by his mom. “Please don’t yell at me.”

Kylo snorted into a chuckle. “Some things never change.”

Leia finally adjusted the tie. “There, now don’t touch it! I mean it!”

Ben nodded, kissed her cheek, then bounded about the room. “Where’s Dad already? DAD! UNCLE CHEWY! Come on already!”

Han stomped down the stairs. “I hate wearing this shit.” He adjusted the clips on the sleeves of his suit.

Leia pointed her finger. “This symposium means a lot to your son, now knock off the complaining. It’s the first one you ever actually attended, the least you can do is keep your trap shut for a few hours.” She waved him off. “I swear, the men in this house—”

Kylo stuck his finger up. “Nah ah! I didn’t complain once.”

“That’s because you’re my sweet little fudgie brownie.”

Kylo leaned back with a smile, satisfied with that answer.

A series of chimes signaled someone at the door. Ben had no time to see who the droid let in, too busy rehearsing the mental outline for his speech in front of the mirror and complaining about how he looked doing it.

“Well ain’t this a sight to behold.” The voice was smooth and ever so familiar. “Knew we’d make a man out of that boy yet.”

Ben spun around. “Uncle Lando! You came?!”

Lando Calrissian stuck his arms out. “I never ignore a request from Leia.”

Ben hugged him and held him at arm’s length. “I can’t believe it! Haven’t seen you in so long, since—”

“You busted the Falcon?”

“I could have—”

“Yeah yeah, hey, forget about that. What you’ve done for this galaxy is all that matters now. I hear you got a hell of a speech to deliver tonight.”

Ben tried to still his breathing. “Yes and I’m freaking out—oh my stars…” He looked past Lando to the man standing in front of the closed front door. “I don’t believe it. _You_ came?”

Luke Skywalker smiled. “Like Lando said, you never ignore a request from your mother—OW!” He rubbed his cheek from the invisible strike sent on the Force. “Oh come on, Leia, really?”

Leia pointed at him. “That’s for chasing my son with a lightsaber, not once but twice!”

“Oh jeez, he forgave me! Right Ben?”

Ben raced over and wrapped his uncle in a tight hug. “I did.”

Leia put her hands to her hips. “Well I’m still working on it.” She broke into a smile. “But I’m glad you came.”

Ben clasped Luke’s shoulders. “I’m so glad you could be here too, Uncle Luke. It really means a lot to me. I know we haven’t had the best of relationships, but…”

Luke smiled and squeezed Ben’s arms. “You’re still my nephew, and I love you, and I’m damn proud of you.”

Ben broke into a broad smile. “Thank you, Uncle Luke. I…may almost be proud of myself for once.”

“Well you should be. You’ve come a long way from the nervous boy who wouldn’t put a book down or raise his lightsaber.”

“Actually, none of that’s changed.”

Luke laughed along with him. “So, where’s my favorite pirate girl?”

“She’ll be down any minute. You remember Kylo though, right?”

“Ahhh yes, my second nephew. How you doing there, Kylo?” Luke stuck out his hand.

Kylo stood and stretched out tentatively to receive the handshake. “Good, um…Uncle Luke.”

Luke remained shaking his hand, eyes scanning the young man. “Seems you’ve come a long way there, Kylo. I can sense Dark power in you, but it doesn’t consume you. You seem…balanced.”

“Ben always tells me that my power is only one small part of me.” He shrugged. “It’s just a tool I use when I need it. I have other things I want for my life now.”

Luke patted his shoulder and smiled. “Your brother is wise, and I’m glad to see you working beyond your past.”

Kylo gave a bashful smile and nodded. “I’m trying. Every day.”

Another ring of the doorbell brought Finn and Jannah into the mansion. Ben laughed in excitement and thrust his arms around his friend. “Finn! How the hell are you? How’s the Jedi Temple?”

“Tougher than I expected but worth every moment.”

Ben opened his arms again. “Jannah? You keeping this guy out of trouble?”

She smiled and hugged him. “More like he keeps _me_ out of trouble. He is an incredible goody-two-shoes.”

“Really. I’m shocked.”

Finn tipped his head forward. “Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?”

“I’m getting better at it, right?”

“Not bad, not bad.”

“Chewy!” Leia cried. “You done brushing yet?” She received a terse response. “Well that conditioner should have made it a lot easier, so what’s taking you so damn long?” The next response bordered on snippy. “Well you just be thankful I didn’t make _you_ wear a suit!”

Ben paused to imagine that and chuckled. And then a vision in glittering white reached the top of the stairs. Ben watched, his jaw on the floor, as Rey cascaded down the steps in her flowing outfit, a combo of pants and dress that fit her personality so perfectly while meeting the approval of one very picky Alderaanian princess. Rey may as well have been his bride as she made her way down, her hair so elegant, her face, her clothing, everything so…so incredibly perfect.

Leia sighed. “Oh Rey, honey, the gun-belt?”

Ben waved her off but didn’t take his eyes off Rey. “Mom, your sweet muffin _loves_ the gun-belt.” He reached out and placed his hands on Rey’s hips right at the belt. “It’s perfect, just like this beauty here.” He gave her the softest kiss on the cheek.

Rey smiled. “I am soooo uncomfortable in all this goop.”

“Oh but you look fantastic.” He planted more kisses about her cheek and jawline, trying not to get any of her makeup on him before he presented. “And it’s only a few hours.” He poked at his hair. “I’m covered in goop too.”

Leia pointed her finger. “You both be grateful for that goop! You look incredible, you all do. Money well spent on stylists. Look, even Chewy looks presentable.” He barked from the top of the stairs. “Oh you’re always the most handsome Wookiee, but this is a symposium, come on! Let’s get on the transport before we mess ourselves up right before the event.”

Han sighed and shook his head. “Princesses.”

#

Ben tipped his head back in the transport, gasping. “I can’t do this!” Heave—heave. “I can’t—do this!”

Rey looked at Kylo and motioned toward Ben. Kylo nodded, pulled out a storage bag from his pocket, and place it over Ben’s nose and mouth. Rey wiggled her fingers, pushing through their dyad connection, and stroked Ben’s scalp without messing up his hair.

“That better?” Rey asked.

Ben closed his eyes as the bag puffed and deflated. “Uh huh.”

Leia patted his knee. “Ben, it’s okay to be afraid, but you have to stop panicking. Only a few hours and it will all be over, remember? And you know this stuff like the back of your hand. You’ll do a wonderful job, I know you will.”

“What if I panic onstage?”

Rey answered. “Then we’ll be right at front and center to cheer you on. I may even do this if I have to.”

“Really?”

“Anything for you.” She smiled her warmest and most genuine smile. “Anything for the hero who gave me my life back. My future.”

“Mine, too.” Kylo massaged Ben’s shoulder. “And remember, the audience isn’t there to watch you fail. They’re there to see a performance and want you to succeed.” He shrugged. “That’s what they tell me in my acting classes.” He grinned. “I like the stage.”

Ben took their hands. “I’m so glad you’re here with me tonight. My strength and my courage—” He nodded toward his mother. “—my foundation.” He looked toward his father and uncle. “And the two who made me relatively impervious to constant criticism.”

Han leaned toward Chewbacca. “Did he just praise us or insult us?” He received a short, gurgled response. “Yeah, I’m not sure either.”

The transport stopped at the back entrance of the conference hall. Ben heaved in one long breath and let it out slowly. “I can do this. I will do this.”

Rey grasped his hand. “You most certainly can and will.”

His eyes flitted from her to Kylo. “You two ready for this?”

Rey shrugged. “Not like we really have to do much.”

Kylo brushed a rogue hair from his forehead. “I actually don’t mind being up there. Kind of looking forward to it.”

Ben shook his head. “I wish I could be like you. Should have had you take my place. They never would have even known if we covered your scar in makeup again.”

Kylo straightened. “You wish you could be like me? I’m the one that always wants to be like you.”

Ben smiled with a quick laugh, and Kylo followed.

“Alright,” Leia said, “the two of you are adorable, but it’s time. Ben, this is your moment, no one can do this for you. So get out there and wow them all.”

Ben nodded. “You’re right. Fuel me.”

Kylo pulled a bottle of Hyper-Fuel out of a bucket of ice and handed it to him. Ben downed half of it in one shot and heaved out a breath. “Let’s get nerdy.”

#

“As you can see—” Ben pointed to the massive display behind him onstage at the symposium. “—the nano-droids flood the patient’s body and work continuously for about six weeks seeking the incorrect DNA strands. When they find a match, they cut the faulty portion of the DNA from the strand. The cell then repairs the DNA with a healthy copy the nano-droid provides. The nano-droid then checks to make sure the new copy of DNA is healthy and viable.

“While this process has been tried before using programmable viruses, the technology wasn’t available to make accurate scans and repairs. My team at SOLO Corp has been working for the past year to develop the nano-droids and their host station, as well as all the programming and biotech needed to make this a viable option. While medical technology hasn’t been a large focus of SOLO Corp in the past, I was inspired down this path by two exceptional people: my magnificent girlfriend Rey, and my clone brother Kylo. Would the two of you please join me onstage?”

The audience seated at dinner tables applauded. Beams of light shone upon Rey and Kylo as they rose to their feet from their table. They made their way to the stage and up to the podium. Ben grasped Rey’s hands and kissed her on the cheek then clasped arms with his brother before returning his attention to the room.

“The New Republic has banned the scientific community from conducting experiments in human cloning, but outside the allied planets of the Republic, such is not the case. Sith cultists used my DNA, in hopes my extensive Force sensitivity could be replicated, to produce a clone in Kylo here. As you can see, we’re identical, although he does a lot more pushups than I do a day.” This got him a chuckle from the audience.

“The Sith cultists had an extensive library on cloning and genetics and tried to create perfect warriors for their cause.” Ben left out the deeper reasons. Some things were not meant for symposiums. “While Kylo was a genetically manipulated clone, Rey here is the daughter of one. Unfortunately, both Kylo and her father Oren were both created with a genetic flaw—” He pointed to the screen again. “—as you can see here in this image of their DNA sequence. The intent, of course, was not a flaw but a superpower for lack of a better term, but the result wound up being deadly to both. If not for the fact that Kylo and Rey are both strong in their Force sensitivity, this flaw would have resulted in their deaths once they reached puberty. You can see here in this video how the flaw alters the proteins holding cells together.”

Once that was done, the image of the faulty DNA returned with another image beside it. “So what we did at SOLO Corp was analyze the data that the Sith cultists had gathered, combined that with information from the top experts in genetics in the galaxy, and our highly advanced R&D team worked together to finally understand how we could manipulate DNA through technology and developed the biotech we are presenting here tonight. On your left, you see the original DNA of both Kylo and Rey, and on the right are the repaired copies. Notice right here—” He pointed with a laser pointer. “—this is the faulty portion, and over here is the healthy replacement. Here’s a video of how the nano-droids do their job.”

While that video played, Ben caught Rey’s eyes and felt the flood of love and admiration pouring through their bond. She was so proud of him, so happy, so in love, and damn he felt the same toward her. He didn’t even realize he missed his cue to continue until Kylo poked him.

“Oh, right. So Kylo here was the first to receive a treatment, and except for mild fatigue and a heavier appetite than usual—which is already heavy to begin with—” Kylo chuckled along with the audience. “—after six weeks, scans and samples were taken and showed the genetic anomaly had been corrected as you see here. We tested the viability by having Kylo expend as much of his Force energy as was safe to do so and noted that he had no effects he normally would have experienced before the treatment. Rey received the treatment next, and we tested in the same manner with excellent results.

“Note that prior to this, without the Force acting as a continual healing for them, such expenditure would have resulted in immediate cellular breakdown and death, as was noted during the Final Order crisis when I learned about this issue with the two of them. Both were on borrowed time, not really knowing when the fatal effects of their condition would strike as it suddenly did to Oren. And though we used our Force training to keep them healthy, none of us could rest easy when a severe fluctuation of power could mean death. But now? Thanks to the incredible team at SOLO Corp and the courage of these two amazing people willing to be the inaugural trial for the device, we now have the medical and technological means to save lives from deadly and debilitating genetic conditions all throughout the galaxy.”

Ben stood smiling at the uproarious applause and cheering. He kept a gracious calm about him, but inside he was exploding in glee. He so deeply had been waiting for this moment his entire life, and he couldn’t have done it without the two of them.

When the applause died down, Ben said, “I’d really like to extend some thanks, as this moment wouldn’t have been possible without those I’m about to mention now. First, of course, my parents, General and Senator Leia Organa Solo and General Han Solo, and my uncle Chewbacca there. Please stand?”

The lights shone on them. Leia, always a pinnacle of grace, waved and blew a kiss to Ben. Han, not looking terribly comfortable being in the spotlight, waved once and sat. Chewbacca seemed to enjoy it a little more than his friend and gave a full wave to all in attendance before sitting.

Ben extended his hands toward them. “My mother has always been there to support my scientific pursuits and was always there to make sure I did important things like eat and sleep.” That earned him more amusement from the crowd. “My father and uncle were instrumental in helping the three of us up here with the whole Final Order situation, and we really wouldn’t be here without them. Thank you, I love all three of you.” Mushy cheers followed that, and Han turned an incredible shade of red.

“Next I need to thank my team at SOLO Corp. Nothing I do would be viable without them getting it together and getting it out to market. I especially want to thank my R&D team for their tireless work during the development of this device. I don’t know how many late nights we had but the overtime statements say there were a lot of them.” He smiled as he got another round of laughter. He ran through the names of all on his team, asking each one to rise as he thanked them personally.

“And finally, I need to thank these two up here.” He put his arm around his brother. “Kylo, the first day we met in person I spent most of it running from you.” That got another laugh, especially from Kylo. “But in the time that we’ve been together, you have helped me grow as a person, pushed me past my boundaries, and made me more than I have ever been. You saved my life, and you opened my heart in ways I never expected. That moment when I first learned about your condition, when I saw you lying there dying, I knew I would never stop until I found a way to save you. Your courage, strength, and tenacity have always inspired me to do more than I ever think I can do, and that you jumped right into this trial speaks volumes about that courageous heart of a warrior you have. I’ll always be grateful for the day you came into my life, and I’ll always love you.”

He hugged Kylo who was back to that stiff, awkward, frozen, and overwhelmed state of being Ben remembered a year prior when their relationship first started. Ben hadn’t had to use the term, ‘I think we broke Kylo’ in a long time, but it was a safe assumption now.

Ben patted his arms, turned to Rey, and grasped her hands. “And finally Rey, the love of my life. When you first came to me, you thought I was a shipwreck.” That got him another round of chuckles. “But it was true! It was true, I was a mess, I fully admit that. Would you believe I fainted when she touched my cheek that first day?” More laughs. Even Rey was giving him her scrunchy-nosed giggle. “I mean look at her, come on guys, tell you wouldn’t faint if this woman touched you?

“But seriously, when we first met, I was not even a fraction of the man I am now. And in that time you showed me such incredible understanding, you’ve been my strength, my rock, my inspiration, my drive. Every drop of courage I have shown has been because you inspired it. My capabilities using the Force, the crazy ideas and schemes we turned into products like Tor-Flex, being the strength I needed when I wasn’t sure I could face off against Palpatine, and saving my life, not even by being the incredibly fierce warrior that you are, but because you loved and understood me more than anyone ever had and kept me rooted in myself. I mean seriously, this woman plays Caverns and Rancors with me, enjoys my rock collection, even cheered the development of Tor-Flex. I’m telling you guys, this woman right here, she’s just phenomenal.”

Rey rolled her eyes while the audience cheered.

Ben stepped a little closer to her. “But my biggest drive to this moment right here tonight was that moment you lay dying in my arms, just like Kylo, after saving my life the first time, when you gave everything to me knowing it would be the last thing you ever did. I knew then how much you loved me, and sure as hell knew how much I loved you. I loved you enough to break past all the barriers holding me back, and it was enough to energize you, energize Kylo, bring you both back to me. It was enough to keep you both alive all this time, the love you drew out of me, the way you expanded my heart enough that it would benefit everyone. I swore to you that day I would do anything and everything to save you from this condition. And I never stopped—you know I didn’t. She had to make me eat and sleep, too!” Another round of giggles.

“But Rey, you have been my greatest inspiration, the most precious thing in my life, and nothing mattered to me more than finding a way to keep you for the rest of our long, long lives together. Because you inspired me to this point, the galaxy gets to have this gift, too. Rey, we saved the galaxy once, and now, because of you, we did it again. I love you so damn much, Rey. I love you.”

_Damn you, Ben!_ A tear coursed down her face, and she tried to turn away so no one would see a space pirate breaking down before the entire galaxy watching the televised event. But Ben grasped her and kissed her for all to see, because the galaxy had to know how much he loved her. When he parted from the kiss, she both laughed and cried into his chest while he held her to the massive applause.

When the audience finally quieted, and Rey restored her composure (after threatening to beat him senseless when this was all over,) Kylo raised his hand. “I want to say something.”

Ben nodded, surprised. “Of course.”

Kylo looked over the audience and straightened his posture. “I just want to say that what my brother has done is more than just a medical breakthrough.” He touched Ben’s shoulder. “When this man found me, well, honestly, I tried to kill him.” He paused as the audience chuckled, bearing a little smile of his own. “But despite that, he looked at me as someone of value, that my life meant something. And even when he could have let me die numerous times, and I admit, I would have deserved it, he didn’t, because he cared. He took me at my worst and said, ‘Come home and be my brother.’ I was his enemy, and he called me his brother.

“Living with me hasn’t been easy.” He grinned at Ben. “But Ben never stopped caring and trying to get me to be my best. He believed in me when I sure as hell didn’t. And he believed in this cure when…honestly, I’m not sure Rey and I did. And because he believed in more than the surface, more than what anyone said could be done, more than…” He swallowed. “More than what I was, he opened…”

Ben froze as he watched tears fill Kylo’s eyes. His brother was liable to run off stage or flip out any moment.

Yet Kylo continued. “He opened the door to a life for me, and for Rey. He gave me so much: a home, a family, school, good food, a soft bed, a real life. And now…he’s given us a future, something we didn’t have before, something no matter how good it got was something that could be taken away at any time.” His mouth quivered, tears rolling down his cheeks. “I get to know what a real life is when all I had ever known was pain. I get to make my own life, my own family one day, everything so many take for granted I couldn’t have until he came to me and offered his hand and said, ‘Join me. Please.’” He sucked in a sob. “And I love him for it, and I’ll always love him, and I just wanted everyone to really see who this is up here…” He could hardly speak through the sobs. “…because he’s not just a scientist or an inventor or a CEO. He’s a hero, a real hero, who loved so much it saved the galaxy…and us.”

Kylo broke down with his hands over his face. Ben, tears dripping down his cheeks, pulled Kylo into the tightest hug while his brother wept on his shoulder, whispering, “Thank you,” over and over.

The crowd erupted into applause and rose to their feet. All around him, a sea of people in their finery smiling in pride of him, his parents, uncles, and friends at the front looking proudest of all. Rey, brushing away her own tears, joined in on the brothers’ embrace. Ben thought he would actually, physically burst from pride and gratitude alone, as well as utter shock. He never expected to get such praise in public, let alone a standing ovation.

Kylo finally pulled back, grasped Ben’s cheeks and smiled so wide before he stepped back. Rey stood on tip-toe to give him a soft kiss before she wiped his face. Ben was so overwhelmed by their love and the situation, he started shaking.

Ben leaned toward the podium, barely able to speak. “I can’t begin to tell you what this night has just meant to me. Thank you.”

He received another standing ovation, but the cheering quelled as the Chief of Science for the New Republic stepped out onto the stage followed by a man holding a cup atop which floated a glowing orb.

“Oh you’re not done here yet,” the Chief said. “Dr. Ben Organa Solo, on behalf of the New Galactic Republic, we’d like to present you, for your discoveries, inventions, innovations, courage, tenacity, and determination in the fields of science, as well as your bravery, dedication, and selflessness in ridding our galaxy of Palpatine and the Final Order, this award.” The Chief took the cup from his assistant and held it out toward Ben. “Contributor of the Century!”

Ben couldn’t feel the floor anymore, nor his knees, or spine. The roaring cheers of the audience were soft and fluffy while he tried to swallow with that dry throat of his. Contributor of the Century? Did they just give him the highest honor that could be bestowed upon anyone in the New Republic?

Rey touched his arm when he didn’t move, and he felt himself step forward, felt himself grasp the cup with the glowing orb, felt himself shake hands with the Chief, but he wasn’t sure if he was still in his body.

He turned to face the audience, knowing he should say something, but he wasn’t sure he had a physical form anymore. His mouth moved though. “I’m…not going to faint.”

That could be a lie any second, but the laughter (with him, and not at him for once,) his mother’s smiling eyes, and his father’s proud beaming, put him back together. “I’m…overwhelmed. I never expected this, ummm…I just…I want to say that I don’t think I’m anything special. I just love. And I’m passionate and curious and I like to think. I’m sure there’s many of you out there just like me, so if I could say anything, it would be to be passionate about life, stand up even when it’s hard, keep going even when you’re afraid, and love will make you more powerful than any obstacle you face. Thank you so much for this. Thank you.”

#

As they rode the transport back to the house, Ben was still trying to figure out how to breathe. His fingers had gone numb from gripping the award with all his strength.

Leia leaned forward. “I am so proud of you, my sweet muffin. You truly earned everything tonight.”

Ben smiled and tried to nod his head but it just went in circles. “I, um, ehehegh.”

Kylo turned to Rey. “I think we broke Ben.”

Rey smiled up at Ben. “Maybe, but I think it’s a happy broken.”

Ben gave her a brief smile and still tried to breathe properly. “Guys you…I’m still trying to process this all…I um…just, thank you, so much for this, for all of it, for everything, for being here with me for this, for just…being in my life. I don’t think this would have meant as much without you all here with me.” Rey leaned onto his arm and he kissed her head. “I’m so overwhelmed with it all, but…damn I’m happy.”

Leia patted his knee. “I’m so glad, and so proud.”

Han smiled. “Yeah kid. You don’t know what it did to me to see my son up there, speaking and showing off what he did, receiving that award. I’m proud of you, kid, so damn proud. It’s an honor to be your father.”

Ben’s face crumpled.

“NO TEARS!”

Ben sniffled. “Too late! Love you, Dad. Love all of you.” He let out a breath. “So damn much.” He tipped his head back and just breathed.

With the cure in place, the symposium over, the galaxy (and his personal galaxy) saved, it was finally time to just breathe. The weight of the ages was off his shoulders, and he had the people he loved and the award of the century to prove it.

He sat up, looked at his family one by one and smiled. It was time to start living his new life.

“So?” Leia said. “What now for the Contributor of the Century?”

“Honestly? I think I might actually take a week off. Play some games—I missed the launch of Space Puncher 2.”

Kylo’s eyes lit up. “I like punching!”

“Maybe make some candy with the chemistry kit, that’s always fun.”

Kylo leaned forward, even more excited. “I like candy!”

“Maybe go hunting for some new minerals for the collection.”

Kylo clenched his fists in delight. “I _love_ minerals!”

“But mostly, I think I’ll spend time wrapped in my special girl, now that we can finally relax and just be with one another.” He leaned over and kissed a dreamy-eyed Rey. “But after that, it’s time to prepare.”

Han shrugged. “Prepare for what?”

Ben grinned and looked from Rey on his left to Kylo on his right. Together, they shouted, “GALACTICON!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you survived all the mush this chapter? Kylo steals the show yet again <3 Our trio is safe and sound and ready for their future!
> 
> At first I didn't have Lando, Luke, Finn, and Jannah in this scene, but then I thought about how it would round everything out to have them come on the most important night of Ben's professional life. I especially wanted to throw Luke in there because even if they did have bad blood for a while, I wanted something more for the characters in this story, where Luke's not just some grouch exiling himself from everything and everyone. That Ben and Luke could share a hug on Ben's important night was just right to wrap up their relationship arc. Plus Leia got to smack Luke LOL! 
> 
> Plus I got to throw in the short interaction between Luke and Kylo. I feel like Luke has maybe learned something in this story, and maybe things don't have to be one or the other, that the character of the person is more important than the tools they wield. 
> 
> And yes, my dedicated readers, it's true. Our trio is finally going to get to GALACTICON! Stay tuned for that fun in the next chapter! It's going to be a special one :)
> 
> PS I'm sure in a galaxy far far away, the formal evening-wear would probably NOT be suits and bowties, and would be something cool and space-y, but seriously, look at Adam Driver in that picture with the white shirt. I mean, come ON! *faints* That was too good not to put in a moodboard!


	22. Galacticon!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Ben, your big day is here!  
> The trio goes to the biggest entertainment convention in the galaxy and gets some surprises along the way.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking FOREVER to post this short but sweet little entry, but I really wanted to get the custom characters done for the moodboards so everyone could see their cosplays. At the end you'll see the full view of our trio at the event!
> 
> This was originally going to be included in the next chapter but that one has gotten massive, so please enjoy this little taste before we get to some big moments!

_One month after the symposium…_

“Yes, I’m registering for the cosplay contest.” Ben listened for the response on his comm.

“Okay, well our registration is done on our site on the holonet.”

“Yes, I get that, but we have a special circumstance. We have a TIE Silencer that’s part of our group entry.”

“A TIE…you mean the starfighter?”

“Yes.”

“A real Imperial starfighter?”

“Yes. I can send pictures if you’d like. It’s sexy.”

“Wow, okay, so you want to arrive in the TIE and have it be part of your cosplay entry?”

“Yes, so I’ll need a special area to land it to have it for consideration. Can you do that?”

“Well, that’s going to cost extra.”

“No problem. Whatever. I had the best sales in the history of my company in the past year, I’m good.”

“Alright, can I get your name and the names of those in your party?”

“Yes, I’m Ben Solo and with me will be Rey and my brother Kylo.”

“…Ben Solo? Rey? Kylo as in ‘Kylo Ren’ Kylo?”

“Yes, but he goes by Kylo Solo now, or Ky Solo if he’s doing something onstage. I’ll be going as Galaxy Wars 6 Darth Vader, Rey is going to be a Rock-Hound Space Pirate, and Kylo is going as me when I fought Palpatine.”

“…”

“Are you still there?”

“Uh…yeah…holy…Can you hold on a minute?”

“Yeah sure, take your time.”

#

“So we’re all good,” Ben said inside the Silencer. He wore the same Darth Vader cosplay he used during the battle, extra armor and all. “They’ll send landing coordinates once we get in range.”

“Perfect,” Kylo said, wearing Ben’s adventure regalia with the cross-chest belts.

Rey, in her original pirate gear, smiled and rocked in her seat. “I have to admit, I’m excited for this. Don’t know why.”

Ben smiled as he watched Coruscant fly past at a blinding speed. “Oh it’s great, you’ll love it. Something for everyone.”

Kylo snorted. “Rey took the easy way out. Is that legally even a cosplay? She’s only going as herself.”

Rey smacked him on the back of the head, eliciting a bark from her victim. “The clothing and armor of a Rock-Hound Space Pirate is no joke. No one can pull this off who doesn’t understand the form and function of each piece. These people are in for a treat, actually getting to see a real Rock-Hound without having to be robbed or killed during the experience.”

Ben patted his brother’s shoulder. “First rule of cosplay, don’t question people’s cosplay. Especially if she can kick your ass across the planet.”

Kylo grunted and tapped at the projections by his controls. “Coordinates loaded, coming in for a landing.”

The Silencer slowed until Coruscant stopped being a blur. The endless buildings passed by, and finally they reached the exposition center with its expansive landing zone. Ben squinted, trying to make out what he was seeing. “Are you sure those are the coordinates?”

“That’s what they sent me.”

“But it’s so crowded. Why is everyone gathered there?”

“Guess they want to see this pretty little sucker land. Can you blame them?”

Ben shrugged. “Nope.”

Kylo brought the Silencer down into the zone. The ship touched ground next to a platform that would allow them to exit to the convention floor. Ben saw nothing but an ocean of people waving signs and jumping up and down. He jammed on his helmet while the hatch opened up and out of the way.

The roar of the crowd made him almost leap out of the ship. Once he gathered his bearings, his jaw hit the floor. All those signs were for them! Many of them were specifically for him! He saw nothing but people in all shapes, sizes, colors, and species dressed in Ben’s adventure gear with the cross-belts. Some were dressed as Rey, and there were plenty of Darth Vaders with the added armor. Some wore helmets, others wore black messy wigs.

Ben couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “What the…”

“Here he is!” The organizer, Tid Merlith, stretched out his hand toward Ben. “THE Ben Organa Solo! That is you under that helmet, isn’t it?”

Ben pulled it off, and the cheers screamed across the masses. “Uh…yeah…?”

“And this is Kylo here?”

Kylo eyed everything with suspicion. “…Yeahhh.” More cheers made him shift into a defensive posture.

“And you must be Rey!”

Rey, just as surprised herself, shrugged and drew her guns, spinning them on her fingers before pointing. “Damn right I am.” The screams of delight were deafening.

Ben looked back and forth, so very confused. “What’s going on?”

Tid laughed. “You hear this guy? What’s going on? Only the Galacticon event of the century! When you called and said you were coming in this beauty of a machine, I knew this would be the Galacticon to end all Galacticons. The trio who saved the galaxy, beat Palpatine for good, and stopped the Final Order were coming here! Right here! To be with us at the galaxy’s biggest entertainment convention. Well I can’t begin to tell you what an honor it is to have you with us. Can I get a round of applause for these guys?”

The roar made Ben want to clamp his hands on his ears, but even if he wanted to, he still couldn’t move. These people were there to see _them!_ Random strangers were cosplaying as _him!_ He wasn’t the one gawking at celebrities for once. He _was_ the celebrity!

Tid leaned his microphone forward. “Is there anything you’d like to say to your fans?”

Ben was _so_ not prepared for this speech. “Um…I…wasn’t expecting this.” That even got cheers. “But I guess mostly I’d just like to thank everyone for, just…coming here and thinking of us, of honoring us with your cosplays and just…welcoming us like this. I know we put a lot on the line to fight for the galaxy, but I never expected so much love I’m…I’m overwhelmed.” He giggled. “Thank you all so much.”

“If I could just say something.” It was a voice Ben would never forget. He couldn’t believe it was real.

And then it happened.

Day Havvens walked up the platform. Day Havvens stepped onto the Silencer. Day Havvens was standing right in front of Ben.

Ben’s mouth opened to speak and froze like that.

Day smiled just like he did at the end of Galaxy Wars 6. “I just want to say how honored I am to meet real heroes like you. When I saw the commercials for your products, I couldn’t believe I was seeing a man dressed in my costume fighting a real and dangerous villain who I only get to pretend-fight in a movie. I watched you do all that while wearing this, taking weapon strikes and not getting hurt—I mean it was real life and it was better than any movie! When I heard you’d be here, well, I decided to ignore my past claim to stop doing the con circuit, just so I could come here and meet you in person. You’re a genuine hero, Ben Solo, and if you’d be so kind, I’d love an autograph.”

Ben remained with his mouth frozen in place until Day Havvens went fuzzy and dark.

#

Ben woke to the chants of, “SO-LO! SO-LO!” Rey’s hand was tapping his face, and Kylo was holding onto him. “Buh?”

Rey leaned in. “Ben, you okay now?”

He nodded. “Day?”

“Right here, buddy.”

Ben turned and his mouth froze once more.

Day laughed, and it transported Ben back to the dream where he met with his grandfather. In fact, he could almost see a gleam in Day’s eye, as if Anakin himself was watching over the whole thing, probably laughing his ass off.

Ben heaved in a deep breath and stood, steady on his feet once more. After a few false starts, he managed to make his mouth move. “I’m…so honored. Sorry I fainted. I do that a lot. I fainted when I first met Rey.” The crowd and Day got a good laugh, and Ben felt more at ease. “I just…you don’t know how badly I wanted you to autograph this cosplay. We missed last year’s Galacticon because we were fighting Palpatine, and I thought I lost my chance forever. When you asked me for _my_ autograph…” He let out a breath and fanned himself. “I just can’t believe this is happening.”

“Well I’d be glad to sign yours if you would sign something for me.”

“Absolutely—here!” Ben detached the armor that went around his upper arm. “This whole thing is made from what I call my Darth Vader polymer, just about indestructible. It took a direct hit from the Praetorian guard. I’d be honored if you would have it.”

“Holy crap, a real Praetorian guard? Oh, wow, the honor’s all mine.”

Tid handed Ben a gold felt-tipped marker. He signed his name to the armor and handed it over, still in shock and dopey with awe.

Day held it up for the cheers and thanked Ben profusely. “Now, where do you want me to sign?”

Ben pointed to his chest. “Right here, if you don’t mind.”

Day took the marker. “Absolutely, and I have to say, you fill out this costume way better than I did.”

Ben laughed. “That’s hard to believe, but thank you.” He watched as Day’s writing streaked across his chest, his delight knowing no bounds.

Day stepped back and looked at Rey and Kylo. “How bout you two? Can I get your signatures on this piece too?”

Rey shrugged. “Um, sure.”

“Yeah,” Kylo said. He jotted his name as Ky Solo and smiled. “I could get used to this.”

Once all that was settled, Tid said, “Now we are not about to ask our honored guests to do anything they didn’t sign up to do, but we do have a room set aside. If at some point during the con you’d be willing to provide autographs, we’d gladly announce the time and compensate you and everything.”

Ben ran his hand through his hair, still unable to believe this was happening. “I’d be glad to, but no need to compensate.”

“Well, at least take these backstage VIP passes for all three of you that will grant you exclusive and unlimited access behind the scenes, talk to whomever you like, anything you need, we are here for you. I know at Galacticon we celebrate our favorite fictional heroes, but you three? You’re the real deal, and we are just so completely honored to have you here.”

The roars filled the landing zone once more. Ben looked down at his VIP pass, at the fans dressed as them, at the signature from Day Havvens.

No other reaction would do.

He roared into a screaming cheer and thrust the cross-guard lightsaber up into the sky, the crowd erupting in delight along with him.

#

The four day long fest was a blur of activity. Ben didn’t have to wait in line for autographs because the celebrities backstage were thrilled to sign any time. He watched the previews of upcoming movies and games, screaming in excitement and jumping out of his chair more than a few times. Their arms were filled with the loads of memorabilia and other merchandise.

He even learned of the fanlore surrounding him, Rey, and Kylo. The fanfiction sites had entire sections and tags dedicated to him and Rey (and honestly, it was giving him some good ideas for the bedroom, these writers were really creative…) Even Kylo had his own section. Ben had never seen him twitch so much in his life reading those entries, cheeks turning incredible shades of red.

Rey and Kylo were just as excited at the con, even if they weren’t as familiar with the amount of entertainment as Ben was. They also graciously accepted the endless attention from con-goers, answering questions, showing off lightsabers, signing so much stuff. By far it was the best con Ben had ever attended.

Hands down, they won the cosplay contest for best group.

On the last day, backstage, some official-looking executives approached them. “Ben Solo?”

Ben wondered what this was about. Were they interested in SOLO Corp products? Ready to drag up possible legal issues regarding Rey and Kylo’s shady past? About to sue him for trademark infringement? “Yes?”

“I’m Rin’eed Tarden from Galactic Pictures, and we would love to adapt your exploits into the next Galaxy Wars movie.”

Ben stared, mouth frozen, throat completely dry. “Buh?”

And as promised, here's the full image of our heroes when they arrive at the event and see their hordes of fans for the first time! Made by Spirit's Paintbrush, spiritspaintbrush.com or land_a_joy on Twitter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, which one of you naughty fans have been writing about Kylo? LOL! 
> 
> How many of you want to bet Ben fainted right in front of those executives from Galactic Pictures?
> 
> Next chapter will be a short(ish) one before another biggie. Some big moments are coming up for our heroes, stay tuned!


	23. Lights, Wires, and Bottoms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, one special surprise deserves another, and Kylo knows just what you need!  
> A Caverns and Rancors game turns interesting, and everyone goes out for a night of fun with a surprise twist.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just FYI there will be some adult partying going on towards the second half and it may get raunchy. It really shouldn't be much of anything more than you'd see on network TV (actually, I think I've seen worse on network TV, looking at you CSI) but if that sort of thing is not your cup of tea, the scenes happen after Rey and Ben are sitting on the balcony.

_Two months after Galacticon…_

Rey played with her little space pirate figurine on the digital grid projected onto the table. “I say we continue forward.”

Kylo made his warrior figurine stab an orc figure over and over. “Deathkill follows.”

Ben sat behind his _Caverns and Rancors_ privacy screen and rolled a polyhedral die. “You enter a junction with five corridors leading from its center.”

“Roll for trap. Did you look over that screenplay?”

Ben scratched his head. “Yeah, I don’t know. It seems a little too gritty. I’m far more inept than they’re trying to portray me.”

Kylo sighed and rolled his eyes. “But it’s supposed to be an action-adventure. You gotta give them a little leeway. It’s not a documentary, not going to be exactly like reality—look at how cool they made our grandfather look, and he was a dick!”

“Eh, true, but when I look back at what happened, I laugh a lot, you know, now that we’re alive and balls have healed.”

Rey almost spit out her drink.

Kylo growled in frustration. “Yeah okay, but you know this is the Galaxy Wars franchise. They’re going to make it exciting and action oriented. If you want something more humorous, you know the contract opens back up in three years. You can shop your story around again.”

Rey giggled. “Kylo really wants to play you. Is it official?”

“It might be if Ben approves the damn script already. They said I have to get an acting coach because I’ve only been doing the classes for a short time, but they like my physicality and intensity, and the Force really helps as it cuts down on special effects. Plus it helps I look exactly like you and know a lot of the story firsthand.”

“Who’s playing me?”

“Livvi Told-Ar.”

Ben almost leapt out of his seat. “No!”

Kylo grinned. “Oh yeah.”

“Oh holy shit, you get to kiss Livvi Told-Ar onscreen?”

Kylo’s smile deepened. “Yep.”

Rey halfheartedly tossed up her hand. “I assume she’s hot?”

“Oh yeah. And fit, and strong, and is perfect, and the sooner this starts, the sooner I get to kiss Livvi. So if Ben would just _approve_ the script—” Kylo pressed his lips together and glared at his brother.

Ben groaned in the most dramatic manner. “I will read it _again_ , okay? Now can we please get moving here?” He made a face at Kylo, who made one back. “No traps. Pick a corridor.”

Rey shrugged. “Third. Deathkill?” Kylo nodded and waved them on.

Ben rolled. “So this next room has a door that only Deathkill can see.”

Kylo stared at Ben, then scratched his head. “Well, since the door is clearly meant for me, I go to open it.”

“Bad idea,” Rey said. “I think you should roll first to determine if it’s a trap.”

Kylo exchanged looks with Ben again before shaking his head. “No, it’s like my…destiny or something. I open the door.”

Ben rolled the die again. “Deathkill gets sucked inside the door, and it closes and disappears.” Ben rolls again. “He’s out until the next game. Sorry, bro.”

Rey sighed and leaned back in her chair. “I told you to roll for it.”

Kylo stretched and stood. “I want to work out anyway before going to bed. ‘Night.”

“’Night, Kylo,” Ben said. He laced his fingers together and rested his chin on them. “So the mad scientist laughs over the intercom and says, ‘Slashy McStabface of the Pirate Ship Fuckoff, you are now all alone and at my mercy!’ There is one more door in the room. What do you do?”

Rey yawned. “Maybe we should pick this up next time.”

Ben straightened in a mild panic. “W-w-wait! Let’s just finish up this part so we can start the next game with the new board.” He leaned forward. “Don’t you want to walk through the door?”

Rey sighed. “Okay, Slashy walks through the door with her middle finger up so the scientist knows she can’t be intimidated.”

Ben rolled a die. “When you walk into the room…” He placed a small treasure chest on the grid. “…you see there is a box with Slashy McStabface written on it. What do you do?”

“Roll for a trap.”

Ben rolled again. “No trap. Do you wish to open it?”

Rey walked her figurine up to the chest. “Okay, I open it.”

Ben stared at her. “No, but really open the one I put on the grid, so you can see what awaits inside.” He grinned and waggled his eyebrows. “More _fun_ that way!”

Rey smirked and rolled her eyes. She lifted the lid and froze. She could hear Ben swallow, but she couldn’t take her eyes from the contents of the box, her heart pounding like it never had before.

Ben let out a quick breath. “The scientist walks into the room and says, ‘Rey, will you marry me?’”

Rey lifted the box, and when the light hit the ring inside, it just glittered. Small, sparkling diamonds circled a milky faceted stone in the center. “Ben…” she whispered. “Ben it’s beautiful.”

He took it out of the box and dropped to one knee before her. His mouth opened and closed a few times before he could speak again, reminding Rey of how he was when they met. “Th-the big stone is a diamond too, and I-I know it doesn’t look like much, like it shouldn’t even be a diamond, but look.” He grabbed a small flashlight from behind his screen and looked up at the ceiling. “Lights off.”

The room pitched into darkness until a deep blue-violet illuminated in Ben’s hand. He shone it over the ring. “It needs long-wave ultraviolet light, so it won’t give you a sunburn like the shortwave, but look!”

Rey gasped. The milky diamond glowed in the brightest blue, just like Ben’s lightsaber. “It’s fluorescent!”

“Yeah! But now watch.” He turned off the UV light and in the pure darkness, the stone glowed yellow. “It’s also phosphorescent. Blue like my lightsaber, gold like yours. The two of us shining at our brightest when faced with the darkest of night. Lights on.” The room brightened once again, and Ben took Rey’s hand. “This diamond is just like us. Everyone looked at us and considered us flawed and unworthy. But in truth, we glow with a light of our own to illuminate the darkness.”

Rey couldn’t speak. The knot in her throat and oncoming tears wouldn’t let her say a word. So she leapt out of her chair and into his arms, kissed those pillowy lips even as she had to suck in a sob, her tears wetting his cheeks. “I love you so much, Ben. You are the best thing that ever happened in the history of the galaxy.”

“Oh I don’t know about that.”

“You are. Trust me, you are.” She leaned back and brushed the tears from her cheeks. “I’d like to answer the scientist’s question. Yes, Ben! A thousand times yes!”

His huge smile lit up his entire face. He gathered her hand with his giant fingers and slid the ring onto her. She’d never had something so beautiful before and didn’t really need such finery. But this was more than a ring. It was a symbol of everything they were together.

Rey wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, reveling in knowing this was just the beginning of their forever.

Ben stared into her eyes and brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. “I know this wasn’t the fanciest way to ask you—”

“I loved it, Ben. It was perfect, just like you.” She kissed the tip of his nose.

Ben grinned. “Well I’m not a complete goof. There’s a candlelight dinner waiting upstairs for us on the balcony.”

Rey narrowed her eyes. “Takeout, droid, or Mom-cooked?”

“Mom-cooked.”

Rey leapt to her feet. “Then what the hell are we still doing down here?”

After one of the most incredible dinners Leia had ever prepared, Rey sat beside Ben on the swinging lounge. Her hand in his, she couldn’t stop looking at that incredible ring. It was true, most women would probably question the quality based on the center stone, but that was because they didn’t understand, just like they hadn’t understood Ben in all his incredible beauty, or Rey herself as she kicked aside any mold as to how she should be. All that mattered was that Ben and Rey understood each other, really saw each other, and recognized a beauty that went far beyond what the eye could see.

Rey scanned the landscape of the extensive property and caught the low moonlight shining off the ocean in the distance. The second moon shone brightly from high above. Down below, fireflies in pink, blue, green, and yellow flashed and danced. Stars dusted across the night sky with the occasional streak of incoming and outgoing starships.

A balmy wind coasted over her skin, and in that moment she fell in love with everything in the universe. This was the gift Ben had been trying to give her all along, that she could experience the love he felt that sparked him to do the impossible. It had eluded her for so long, but now, in this moment, embraced with everything she never knew she wanted, she felt it. For all she had been through, it was worth it to be here in this moment with him.

She tipped her head onto his shoulder and nestled against his body. “I love you so much, Ben. Thank you for giving me the universe.”

Ben kissed her on the head. “Thank you for _being_ my universe.”

Rey chuckled and stroked her fingers along his chest. “I’m going to love every moment I spend with you as your wife. Wife…I can’t believe I’m actually using that word!”

“Me neither! This incredible, gorgeous, sexy, strong, intelligent, courageous, did I mention sexy—”

Rey chuckled.

“—perfect woman is going to be my wife. It’s a dream come true. Hey, think I can I wear my Darth Vader cosplay to the ceremony?”

Rey chuckled. “Mmm, I don’t think your family would appreciate that.”

“True. What about Kylo’s old uniform?”

“I…don’t think that’s a good idea, considering his past feelings for me.”

“Yeah, things will get weird. I could do Ar-Bar the Mighty, furry underpants and two chest belts.”

Rey nodded, her lips askew. “As…tempting as that would be, I’m not sure it’s right for a wedding ceremony. Why don’t you just go as Ben Solo, just…be the best Ben Solo you could ever be. Wear what makes you feel the best and is solely you.”

Ben stroked his chin. “Hmmm…interesting thought.”

“I might actually wear a dress in public! No pants this time. Could you imagine?”

Ben’s eyes grew wide. “Whoa…that’s hot.”

“Your mom will go berserk taking me shopping for a dress. You thought we went on shopping sprees before!” They both laughed. “Hm, maybe she’ll convince me to look at real wedding gowns.”

“Ones that go with the gun-belt, of course.”

She kissed his cheek. “I love how much you know me.” They basked in the light of the moon and stars some more, just so content and in perfect bliss with one another. “You know Ben, I never had, needed, or wanted a last name, but now I will be proud to be called Rey Solo.”

Ben tipped his head down, his eyes so dark in the silvery light, his ebony hair framing a face that glowed beneath the celestial illumination. “I think that’s the most beautiful name I’ve ever heard.”

Rey straddled him and kissed him deep beneath the glow of a galaxy that owed its peace to their endless love.

#

_Five and a half months later…_

“The Hot Wire,” Han said as he looked up at the sign. “Well, sounds promising.”

Ben rubbed his hands together. He couldn’t wait for Kylo’s bachelor party surprise. “I like it already!”

Finn shrugged. “As long as there’s booze and boobs, I’m game.” Chewbacca seconded that statement.

Kylo nodded, his smile so big it was about to shatter his face. “Oh there’s both alright.”

Poe patted Finn’s shoulder. “I’m just glad you guys invited me to come along.”

Finn huffed. “Yeah, well, when I said I was going to a bachelor party, and you started begging to the point of tears, how could I not ask to bring you along.”

Poe hung on his shoulder. “This is why I love this guy. All you have to do is start crying, and he caves in seconds.”

Ben stuck his finger up. “That’s not true. I cried the entire Palpatine mission, and he didn’t rush to my side once.”

“The charm doesn’t work if you use it constantly, my friend.”

Kylo waved them in. “Come on, it’s time.” He stepped first through the doorway. “Solo party.”

The droid blipped, and an LED turned green on her chest. “Right this way. Your table is waiting.”

Ben marveled as he followed Kylo into the establishment. Lit in pink LEDs along burgundy walls, it was bright enough to see yet dim enough not to be uncomfortable. Female droids of perfect form flitted about, taking drink orders.

The group sat at their table near the catwalk, and Han was already pleased. “Nice job, Kylo. Honestly, I wasn’t sure it was a good idea to put you in charge of the bachelor party, but so far so good.”

Kylo gripped Ben’s shoulder. “As the best man, it’s my duty to make sure Ben is fully entertained by the female form before he makes a lifetime commitment to one woman. I like to think I know my brother enough to know just what he likes.”

Ben wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled him close for a hug. “Just so glad you could get the time off from the set. Missed you so damn much. Can’t friggin believe my brother will be playing me in Galaxy Wars!”

Poe leaned in. “Whoa, Galaxy Wars, huh? Better get myself an autograph from you now before it hits the screens. Who’s playing Rey?”

Kylo grinned. “Livvi Told-Ar.”

Poe slumped to the table. “Oh my stars…you are one lucky bastard.”

A droid scooted to their table. “May I take your drink order?”

“Corellian whiskey,” Han said. “Make it a double.” Chewbacca seconded.

Ben asked, “What do you have that’s non-alcoholic?”

Han groaned. “Ah Ben, it’s your bachelor party! The hell is the point if you don’t get shit-faced?”

Kylo shook his head. “I don’t want to get drunk either. What else do you have?”

The droid projected the menu of drinks, and Ben perked. “Wait, what is this Hyper-Fuel 3X?”

The droid said, “Three times the Hyper, three times the fun! It contains a triple dose of the stimulant found in standard Hyper-Fuel.”

Ben’s jaw dropped. “I did not know it came in a triple. I’ll have one of those. The blue one.”

Kylo stuck his finger up. “I’ll take the one in red.”

“Fuel up?”

“Fuel up!”

Poe pointed two fingers at them. “You two are strange; I’ll have a Yavin vodka on the rocks.”

“Make that two,” Finn said.

Ben grinned. “Well, now what?”

_A half hour later…_

Ben’s eyes were two giant planets. “What is—what the—can you see through your hand?”

Kylo plastered his hand right to his nose. “I think so! I see all the bones—NO! I see molecules! All of them!”

“I see all known elements of the universe! They’ve come ALIVE!”

Han shook his head. “You’d think after all that crap he drinks he could handle a triple dose.”

Poe blew out a breath. “Got to admit, I kind of wish I had gotten what they got.”

“BEN!” Kylo grabbed his brother. “Ben, listen to this! I get it now! I think I can prove that F of X is equal to X over X minus 1 is uniformly continuous on the set 2 to infinity!”

Ben brightened like he had just reached nirvana. “Yessss, do it. DO IT!”

Poe leaned toward Finn. “Are they conjuring demons?”

“Yeah,” Finn said, “I think so.”

Just as Kylo was about to unleash some advanced calculus he had never understood before, the lights on the side dimmed, and the ones on the catwalk brightened. A sultry female voice said, “Dearest audience, it is now time for our show. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ladies of The Hot Wire!”

Han clapped. “Yes! Let’s see luscious beauties in here!”

Kylo pulled Ben close to the catwalk and put his arm around him. “This is all for you, brother. Happy Bachelor Party!”

“Happy…Bachelor Party to me, too!”

Finn stroked his chin with a smile. “Those two are very strange but, ah hell, Happy Bachelor Party to all of us.”

“I’ll drink to that.” Han downed another cup of whiskey.

The music pounded in the speakers (yet at the perfect level for Ben’s ears, Kylo must have said something.) And then the parade, a delicious, sexy, shapely, mouthwatering parade—

—of droids.

“YES!” Ben cried. “Oh Kylo YES! This is the best surprise EVER!”

Kylo shook his brother’s shoulders. “Didn’t I tell you? I KNEW you’d love it! Look at them all up there…damn…”

Han dropped his hands to the table. “Sexbots? We came here to look at sexbots?!”

Finn massaged his forehead while Poe looked at the rest of the guys in disbelief. “I begged for _this_?”

“Waitress!” Han cried. “Refill. Make it a quadruple.”

#

Meanwhile, Rey, Jannah, and Leia strolled the streets of Hanna City alongside Rose and Kaydel from the Resistance.

“That restaurant was great,” Rey said. “I’ve never tried Onderonian food before.”

“Oh, it’s incredible.” Leia laid her hand upon Rey’s arm. “But since you have to mix all the separate things together to get the full flavor, Ben does nothing but whine and complain whenever I want to get it. It’s a good chance to try it.”

“It was incredible,” Rose said. “I’m so glad you called us!”

Kaydel nodded. “So nice to be able to see each other without worrying about the galaxy blowing up.”

“Definitely!”

Janna turned to them. “I’ve never done this bachelorette party thing before. What is it we’re supposed to do?”

“Not really sure,” Rey said. “No one ever got married on the pirate ship.”

Leia folded her hands. “Well, I know I’m much older than you gals, so I hope I won’t be too much of a fuddy duddy tonight. But I think I might just know a place Rey might enjoy. Come, down this street.”

When they entered the building Leia had in mind, Rey just stopped and stared with her mouth open along with Rose, Kaydel, and Jannah. Shining, oiled, muscular, gorgeous men galore, clad in barely any C-leather, most of them wearing collars and cuffs around their wrists and ankles. There were chains. Lots of them.

Patrons flogged their legs and backs. One woman was riding a man while he crawled onstage. Some men were just curled up at the feet of the patrons, their masters holding their chains and petting them.

One incredibly gorgeous hunk of beef stopped before them. “Hello ladies. What will you command me to do for you tonight?”

Rey still had her jaw dropped open. Leia, always looking so sweet and precious, smiled at the group of women. “What do you say, girls? Shall we go smack some bottoms?”

#

Back in The Hot Wire…

“Show me the circuits, baby!” Ben cried to the droid wiggling in front of him. She pulled open her abdominal panel, showing off the flashing boards and components inside. “Ohhhh yeah, look at those capacitors! I bet you could go all night long on those!”

Kylo pointed to a spot on the board. “What are those things?”

“Those are resistors.”

“Oh. Resistors are HOT!”

Poe looked to Finn, Finn looked to Chewbacca, Chewbacca looked to Han, and Han buried his head in his arms.

#

And what are our ladies doing while Han is hiding in shame and disappointment?

Rey rode on the back of her muscle-bound giant, whacking his rear with a riding crop. Jannah was making her man beg for snacks from her tray. Rose and Kaydel chased men with giant nets. And Leia reached out and cracked her hand against the shapely, muscular bottom of a waiter who simply grinned and asked for another.

#

And in The Hot Wire…

Ben and Kylo danced onstage with their hands on the droids’ hips. Finn flagged Ben down. “Hey friend of mine, what do you say we go try a nudie bar with some actual mortals now?”

Ben scoffed. “What the hell for? Oh! Check it out!” Loose wires showered down from above, and Ben laughed in delight, rubbing them all over his chest. Kylo grabbed a handful and used them to pull his droid closer to him.

Han stood. “Screw this. Kid, we’re going to find real flesh and bone. You coming with us or staying here?”

Now the droid was rubbing the wires all over Ben’s chest. He looked at his father in utter disbelief. “Duh, I’m staying here!” He shook his head and looked at Kylo. “What’s with these guys?”

Kylo mouthed at the droid’s neck. “They just don’t know how to have fun.”

Finn smoothed his hand over his head and pointed with both hands at the guys onstage. “Okay, so message us when the show’s over and we’ll…we’ll meet up again. Sound like a plan?”

Ben just waved him off and hoisted a droid around his waist.

#

Onstage, a fully clothed Rey was being held upside down by one hunk of man while another wiggled his face in her crotch to her hearty laughter. Rose and Kaydel watched with their hands over their mouths, laughing their heads off.

Jannah leaned over to Leia. “This place is rather raunchy!”

“Damn right!” Leia patted her hand. “Go on, you want to go up there? My treat!”

Janna grinned. “Can I?”

“Go on! Have fun!”

While Jannah ran up in glee, Leia turned around to the man behind her. “I never said stop.”

“My apologies, Madame Senator.” The man continued with his massage.

Leia sunk into his handiwork. “At least someone knows how to do it right.”

“Anything for my most frequent customer.”

Leia sported a grin and watched as men manhandled both Rey and Jannah onstage.

#

Ben tiptoed into the bedroom after the night’s festivities. He had way too much fun, stayed out way too late, and was still feeling the buzzing effects of that 3X Hyper-Fuel. Maybe that sucker wasn’t such a good idea, but ooooh boy was it a rush!

“I’m still awake,” Rey said.

Uh-oh. “Heyyyy, sorry I’m coming home so late.”

She snorted and signaled the lights to turn on. “Don’t be sorry. It was your night to have fun. So did you?”

Ben shrugged. “Oh, you know, it was okay.”

“You know you can’t lie to me.”

“Okay fine, it was incredible! Kylo picked out the perfect place and…” He clamped his mouth shut.

Rey patted the bed. “You don’t have to talk about it. It was your bachelor party. What you did or didn’t do is for you only.”

Ben pulled off his shirt. “What do you mean by didn’t do?”

“Well you’re clearly not drunk.”

“Didn’t have to be. Did you know they have a Hyper-Fuel 3X?”

“Oh jeez, no wonder why your eyes are springing out of your head.”

Ben shoved his boots and pants off and jumped into the bed next to her. “Yeah, I may be a little wired for a while—wired, oh my stars, I can’t believe I just said that.”

“What?”

“Never mind. What did you gals do, huh?” He waggled his eyebrows.

Rey shifted and took her eyes off of him. “Oh, you know, went out to eat, had Onderonian—”

“Ugh, gross!”

“Then we just went to a bar and had a few drinks.”

Ben nudged his nose against her arm. “Remember, my dear? Our bond won’t let us lie and get away with it.” He kissed her soft, bare skin. It was nice to have real flesh beneath his lips again. “But you don’t have to tell me anything.” He moved his kisses up her shoulder to her neck. “It was your night to have fun, too.” His last kiss landed at her mouth and stayed there. Ah, she was just as responsive. Guess she was feeling a little frisky, too. He nudged himself over her body and deepened his kiss. “I’m not keeping you awake, am I?”

“Why do you think I was waiting up for you?”

He gave her a sly chuckle and kissed her once again.

When he trailed his kisses back down her jaw to her neck, she said, “I will say one thing. I now know who put the items in the top left drawer of the Falcon.”

Ben looked up at her. “I don’t want to know any more, do I?”

“You really don’t—hey—” She dug into his raven mane and pulled out a loose wire. “What is this doing in your hair?”

His eyes nearly fell out of his head. He grinned, grabbed the wire, tossed it aside, and silenced her with his deepest, most earth-shattering kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the fluorescent and phosphorescent diamonds are truly a thing! Check it out here: https://www.naturesrainbows.com/single-post/2018/12/25/Diamonds
> 
> What a way to pop the question, eh? Did you expect any different from our nerdy space muffin?
> 
> Kylo's going to star in Galaxy Wars as Ben! How cute is that? And he really knows what his brother likes, huh? 
> 
> And now we all know a little more about Leia than perhaps we wanted to... The antics onstage where our bachelorette went was based on a real male revue I had gone to for, yes, a bachelorette party (as a bridesmaid thank goodness.) I am not one who would be considered a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but I was SHOCKED at what the guys were doing onstage to the women. So yeah, Rey's experience was based on reality, I did NOT make that up...
> 
> PS: Ar-Bar the Mighty is totally He-man.
> 
> Next chapter will be a big one, but obviously special...stay tuned!
> 
> Oh yeah, I'm also on Twitter at @shannon_enloe if you'd like to follow or drop me a line!


	24. Forever One, Plus Those Guys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben, Rey, it's your special day! What could go wrong?
> 
> Oh right, those guys...
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One last splash into steamtown at the end of the chapter! Enjoy!

_Two weeks after the bachelor/ette parties…_

Ben checked himself one last time in the mirror. Rey had said to dress as the best Ben he could be, and between him, Kylo, and his mother’s fashion approval, this is what he came up with: a formal dark blue Jedi shirt to represent his start and his lineage, black pants and Jedi vest because it looked badass, the criss-cross belts over his chest with lightsaber on his hip to represent who he became, knee-high boots because Kylo said he would look stupid in regular shoes, and a black, flowing cape because Rey said he looked sexy in one. As an added bonus, Leia said it gave him a regal look reminiscent of his royal bloodline.

Ben convinced Kylo to wear similar except in dark red with no cape or cross-belts. Kylo wasn’t sure he should wear Jedi-style robes since he had never been one, but Ben said it was in his blood too. Plus, once Kylo saw what Ben looked like, he immediately jumped to his feet, fists clenched, and declared for the entire galaxy to hear that he wanted to wear the robes.

Ben was grateful the movie studio had granted Kylo leave for the parties and wedding. _Ben Solo—A Galaxy Wars Story,_ was in full production, and Ben couldn’t wait (while being slightly terrified of the final results.) As a bonus, the studio had Kylo undergo a few painless procedures that rendered his scar nearly invisible, only viewable in the right light and easily hidden with makeup. Not only was the movie a most awesome turn of events, it was transforming Kylo into a new version of himself. In fact, except around close family, he called himself Ky Solo regardless of whether he was on or off set.

Ben turned to the men seated in the groom’s suite of the manor. “Well, how do I look?”

“Perfect.” Han knocked back a drink. “Now let’s get this show on the road already. Sooner I can get out of this suit, the happier I’ll be.”

“Nervous?” Finn asked.

Ben shook his head. “Nah, well, not to be married anyway. I think I wanted that from the first day I met her. I’m just hoping I don’t do anything to screw up the wedding. You know I’m so damn clumsy.”

Kylo pointed at his hip. “Did you tape down the ignition switch on the lightsaber?”

“Oh yeah, I wasn’t taking that chance again.”

“Good, and if you trip, I’m on duty to make sure you don’t hit the ground. You have nothing to worry about, brother. I’m looking out for you.”

Ben squeezed his shoulder. “You’re the best best man ever.” His comm flashed. “Oh crap, it’s time.”

Han tapped Chewbacca, finished the last of his drink, and stood. He hugged Ben and gave him a good pat on the back. “Proud of you, son. Also glad you’re not marrying one of your droids.”

It was Kylo that looked offended. “Droids have feelings too!”

Han looked at him, exasperated. “You brought Melanie, didn’t you?”

“Shut up, Dad!” Kylo barked. “I needed a quick date!” 

Ben hugged Chewbacca and brushed off the resulting hairs, then his friend Finn.

Han waved the two guys onward. “We’ll see you out there.”

Ben grasped Kylo’s shoulders. “You sure I look okay?”

Kylo removed a few more Chewy hairs. “Yeah, you look fine, even with that giant zit forming on your nose—”

“WHAT-THE-WHAT?!”

Kylo burst out laughing. “I’m just fucking with you.”

Ben growled to the sky. “Did you have to find your sense of humor now of all times?”

Kylo fought a case of the giggles and clasped Ben behind his neck. “Bro, you’re fine. She’s going to love you, okay?”

Ben nodded. “Okay. Hey, um, listen, I know we talked about this before, but…it’s kind of a reality dose now. Are you going to be okay out there? Seeing me and Rey? With your history?”

Kylo nodded. “I’ll be fine. What we had…it was during a time in my life when I had no one, and she was my shining light even if she swore she was nothing but darkness.”

Ben grinned. “I totally understand that.”

“I loved her. Not much else to say about it.” He shrugged. “She made it clear we would never be together. It hurt for a while, yeah, but you and the rest of the family filled that emptiness in me. I guess I was just looking for someone to love me. Anyone.” He smiled. “I haven’t thought of her in that way in a long time. I’ll find my Rey one day, still working on myself. Besides, I have women throwing themselves at me all the time. I only took Melanie because I need to focus on the movie after this.” He patted Ben’s shoulder. “I’m fine, really.”

Ben smiled. “Good, because you know you mean the world to me. I don’t want you to be hurting.”

The sweetest smile spread across Kylo’s face. “You’re the best brother in the galaxy.” He nudged his head toward Ben in that affectionate way of his. “I’m good, you’re good, she’s great. Come on. Let’s get you married.”

#

In the bridal suite, Leia flitted about after having made sure Ben was put together properly. “Here, try these earrings—oh honey, are you sure you want to add the gun-belt? Isn’t the armor enough?”

Rey rolled her eyes. She was barely wearing any armor, just the top of her Tor-flex ensemble about her shoulders. “Mom, I have to wear the gun-belt. Ben _expects_ the gun-belt. Ben _loves_ the gun-belt. And it honors my history just like Ben’s Jedi robes honor his.”

Leia gently gripped her arms from behind and kissed her on the head. “Okay, okay. What about the earrings?”

Rey turned them in her fingers. “Okay, we’ll go with the earrings.” Before Leia left her again, Rey grasped her arm. “Please don’t think I’m ungrateful for your help. Just certain things about me are not…princess-y.”

“Ohhh Rey…” Leia grasped her hand in both of hers. “…think nothing of it, dear. I was fighting a war at your age, and I wasn’t feeling very princess-y back then either.” Both women shared a chuckle. “I know I get carried away. You should have heard me in the boys’ room fussing over Ben and yelling at Han because he can’t keep his damn tie straight.” After another giggle, Leia cupped Rey’s face in her hands. “You are beautiful, and I guarantee Ben’s going to take one look at you and burst into tears because he is really good at bursting into tears.”

Rey laughed again and almost felt them coming on herself. “I’m glad you’re here. I really needed a mom today.” The tears rose anyway.

“Ohhh honey…” Leia hugged her, and Rey really tried not cry, especially now that her makeup was done. “I am glad to be here for you. And I was never blessed with a little girl of my own, so forgive me if I go overboard lavishing everything on you.”

“There’s nothing to forgive. I love you for it.”

“And I love you too, Rey.” Leia pulled back and grasped a handkerchief. “Now, let’s dry those beautiful eyes. This makeup shouldn’t run, but let’s not take any chances, huh?”

Rey smiled and gave one final sniffle. “Okay.”

Jannah knocked on the open door. “Heyyy! We’re here!” Rose and Kaydel were behind her, waving.

Rey smiled. “Come on in, I’m almost ready.”

Rose grasped Kaydel’s arm. “Oh my stars. She…she doesn’t look like she’s going to rip our faces off!”

Kaydel shook her head. “Is that really Rey the Space Pirate or a fashion model pretending to be her?”

Rey snorted. “The two of you haven’t changed a bit.”

“Can’t say the same!” Kaydel jogged in with Rose right behind her. “I never thought I’d see you like this.”

Rose shook her head with a smile. “It’s an incredible transformation.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “It’s a dress and makeup. I’m the same me, and I still rip faces off.”

The women shared a giggle. Kaydel plopped into a chair. “So Ben, huh? He is pretty tall and dreamy, though he did scare the hell out of me when he yanked my gun out of my hand that day.”

Rey burst out laughing. “Ben scared _you?_ He’ll find it hilarious he scared anyone.”

Leia added, “He spent one week literally afraid of his own shadow, did you hear that one?”

Rey laughed even harder. “I thought Han was exaggerating!”

“No, no he was not.”

Rey bit her lip. “But Ben is the sweetest. He has the most beautiful heart and mind. Not always so good in a fight, but he’ll surprise you. When all seems lost, he rises up to be his best self. He’s incredible. I couldn’t love anyone but him.”

Leia checked her comm. “Oh, and it looks like it’s time, dear.” Rey rose and Leia stepped before her to straighten her dress and hair. “You ready?”

“To marry Ben? Always.”

Leia cupped her cheek. “Then let’s get you to that boy of mine. I can’t wait to see the look on his face.” She handed Rey her bouquet, and the group of women led the bride out of the suite.

#

Rey hadn’t cared where they got married and quickly agreed when Leia suggested they have their wedding on Naboo. Apparently her birth mother, Padme, was from there and had married Anakin Skywalker somewhere near the manor. Ben was sold on Naboo at the mere mention of his grandfather.

The manor they had selected was exquisite in its architecture and placement, right across the river from nine towering waterfalls. The cool mist carried across the distance and settled on the countless flowers and plants that lined the terrace and walls. Sweet, thick, and floral, the scent alone filled her heart and soul.

Rey followed the path that would allow her and Ben to meet and then walk up the aisle together to the officiant. She wasn’t entirely sure what he was planning on wearing, only saying it was a secret. Kylo guarded the closet with his lightsaber (and he was damn serious about using it, too, and needed a whack upside the head just on principle.)

As she turned the corner, she caught a glimpse of their guests. She never expected to have so many people at her wedding (she never really expected to _have_ a wedding.) Members of the Resistance had come, including Poe, who was joined by Finn. Jannah, Rose, and Kaydel sat next to them. Lando Calrissian and Luke Skywalker sat just behind Han and Chewbacca. Leia greeted her old friend, Amilyn Holdo, and sat next to her. C3PO, BB-8, R2D2, Melanie, and the Knights of Ben rounded out the droids. There were a handful of others from Ben’s side she didn’t really know. Honestly, she knew so few, not having much of a family to speak of. The closest she had were the Resistance members and was glad they at least filled in some of the spots.

Then the world slowed to a crawl. Stepping toward her in that special gait of his, dressed in black and royal blue, Ben strode with his ebony locks of hair bouncing with every step. The wind carried his black cape and allowed it to flutter behind him. He was a dream, an absolute heavenly dream, like a night full of moonlight and stars.

His eyes widened and his beautiful mouth dropped open in awestruck delight. His hand curled to his chest, just like it had in those early days when he was so nervous around her, but she knew it had another meaning this time. That same hand then extended out to her as he rushed forward, like he couldn’t get to her fast enough.

She reached out as well and placed her hand in his giant palm, so deeply honored to take this man’s hand. He pulled her close to him at their designated meeting place and he grasped her other hand. The biggest, brightest smile spread across his face, so intolerably adorable and precious.

“Rey…” He shook his head and just couldn’t stop smiling. “…you’re…magnificent.”

“And you, sir, are just majestic. My prince.”

“My princess.”

She narrowed one eye in thought. “I’m not sure I fit the description of princess very well.”

“You do to me.”

Rey melted and squeezed his hands. She needed to marry this beautiful creature already.

The wind kicked up, billowing his cape, and a light rumble filled the air. A ship lowered from the atmosphere just outside the manor.

Ben squinted his eyes. “Ohhhh what the hell is that? That looks creepy.”

No, not creepy.

It was something Rey never expected in a thousand years. The ramp lowered, and a group of rough, hardened folk scrambled out, looking like they might rob the place any minute. At the lead was a tall, confident man with graying hair and beard who slid off his thick gauntlets and opened his arms.

Rey smiled and rushed toward them. “You came!”

Shirac laughed and hugged Rey. “I couldn’t refuse an invitation to my girl’s wedding.”

“I just never expected you’d actually show up! At most, I thought you’d send me a gun in congratulations.”

Shirac snapped his fingers and one of the pirates presented a box. “That’s what this is for.”

Rey laughed and hugged Mern. “Oh I’m so glad you came, all of you. Ben! BEN!” Rey rushed back to her groom who did not move from his spot, only stared with huge eyes and thin lips.

“Rey,” Ben squeaked, “are those…are those…”

Han huffed. “Space pirates. Yep.”

Shirac strode over. “Shitstorms and exhaust ports, it’s Han Solo and Chewbacca! What the hell are you two doing here?” He slapped a huge handshake into both men’s hands.

Han pointed at Ben. “Rey’s marrying my boy over there.”

Shirac put his hands on his hips and arched backwards. “No shit!” He flew over to Ben and slapped him hard on the back. Ben squawked as he stumbled forward. “I didn’t know Rey was marrying a Solo! You must be one hell of a pilot and ass-kicker like your old man!”

Ben clutched Rey’s arms from behind. “Not really,” he eeked out.

Rey turned and pulled Ben to stand beside her. “Ben’s a brilliant scientist and inventor renowned around the galaxy. Probably half the tech in your ship was invented by him.”

Shirac crossed his arms, mouth wide open in delight. “Well no shit!” He grasped Ben’s shoulder and rattled it. “Well you must be one hell of a fighter anyway if Rey’s marrying ya!”

As Ben whimpered in terror, Kylo shot up in front of his brother, the warrior blood in him on fire. “I’m his brother, Kylo. I do the fighting for him.”

Now Ben was clearly hiding behind Kylo, gripping his brother’s dark red arms with all his strength.

Shirac stroked his beard. “Kylo…Kylo—hey! You’re the kid from Exegol!” He slapped Kylo in the shoulder. Unlike his brother, Kylo didn’t budge. “I knew I recognized ya! And you’re a Solo boy too, no less, eh? Tell me you at least can fly a ship like the old man.”

Kylo crossed his arms. “I’m the best fighter pilot in the galaxy.”

“Bullshit,” Poe coughed into his hand.

“And the best fighter next to Rey.” He patted Ben’s white-knuckled hand digging into his arm. “And if you want to get to my brother, you have to go through me.”

Rey gave Kylo a friendly slap in the chest. “Relax, Shirac’s just being friendly. Ben? Ben, come out please.”

Ben inched back beside Rey, looking like he might actually be capable of sucking his head into his shoulders. He forced a grin and wiggled his fingers in a wave.

Rey took his ice cold hand and leaned up against him. “Ben’s not a professional warrior, but when he has had to step up and protect the ones he loves, he has been stronger and more powerful than any warrior that has ever walked this galaxy. He took on Palpatine’s Praetorian guards and Palpatine himself right beside me. _And_ I personally saw him kick Luke Skywalker’s ass once.”

“Hey!” Luke called from the seats.

 _“Furthermore_ , I watched him decimate an entire Final Order Star Destroyer from the inside, making the entire crew lose their minds.”

Kylo stuck his finger up. “I was in charge of that ship when that happened. And…Ben kicked my ass on that venture, too. He’s, ah…” Kylo scratched behind his head. “He’s not a typical warrior, but he’ll always save and protect the ones he loves.” He nodded toward Rey. “He’s saved our lives a few times. Even cured that genetic thing.”

Shirac went from highly impressed to suddenly tender as he turned to Rey. “That thing with you? The deadly thing? The one that took your old man?”

Rey nodded. “Ben found the cure. He saved me and Kylo from it. We never have to worry about it again.”

Shirac smiled and widened his arms. “Anyone that saves my girl here is welcome to the crew. Come here, Ben!”

Ben’s teeth chattered. “I’d rather no—YEARGH!” Shirac yanked him into one of his death-grip hugs he was famous for. “Help,” Ben squeaked.

Shirac let him go, and Ben returned to Rey’s side, trying not to let on that he was inching behind her.

Rey put her hands to her hips, right at her gun-belt, as was the appropriate sign that you were being serious in what you were about to say. “I’m so glad you all came to see me on my special day. I missed you crazy fuckers, but listen! This is my wedding day so no dumb shit, got it?”

Shirac waved over his crew. “We will all be on our best behavior, won’t we?”

“AH-GAAAH!” the crew cheered with their fists in the air.

“AH-GAAAH!” Rey echoed with her own fist. “Then have a seat, huh? I have a man to marry here!”

“AH-GAAAH!” the crew replied and filed in toward the other guests. Rey greeted each one and met some new members who gazed at her in awe. They all found chairs and kept quiet as promised.

Rey turned to Ben. “Thank you for being so patient with them.”

Ben gave her a thin-lipped smile with tiny crescent eyes. “I can’t breathe!”

“Shhhhh…” Rey reached through the Force as to not mess up his hair and stroked his scalp. Ben’s face eased immediately.

Kylo leaned in. “Do I need the bag?”

Ben heaved in a wheezing breath. “Nah I’m good.” His voice was two octaves too high. “Rey they’re not…I mean they won’t…are you sure they’ll…”

Rey cupped his face. “They will behave, I promise. Remember, they’re all still terrified of me and what I can do. Relax Ben, please? They won’t hurt you, I promise.” She smiled at him, and his face finally softened, his beautiful warm smile returning. “Marry me, Ben.”

He straightened, heaved in a deep breath, linked arms with her, and grasped her hand. “It will be my pleasure, my precious pirate princess.”

As he led her to the officiant at the front of the terrace overlooking the exquisite architecture and interspersed waterfalls, she felt that magic settle back in. That regal face of his stared forward with a soft smile about his lips, so sure and ready for what he was about to do. The guests watched them with smiles, waves, clasped hands, and fists in the air, but all she saw was Ben. Her prince.

He ruled no kingdom but headed a successful business. He had no castle but an enormous house with a science lab attached. He wore no crown but shone brighter than all the jewels in the galaxy.

They stopped and turned to face one another before the officiant. That black cape fluffed just once on the wind and settled around him. So handsome, so absolutely perfect.

She couldn’t wait to say _I do_.

#

Lots of words were said, and one part of Ben’s mind heard them, but a majority of his attention was just absolutely engulfed in the incredible beauty before him.

How did she look so perfect? Was there a formula for it? Her face, her hair, her dress with the Tor-Flex shoulder armor and the gun-belt on her hips? She was exactly what he said, part pirate, part princess, and both so perfectly merged into a woman beyond his dreams.

On his cue, he said it without hesitation. “I do.”

And on hers, it was magic in his ears. “I do.”

Kylo presented the rings, having guarded them with his life, nostrils flaring, his eyes flitting about to make sure no one was coming to swipe them before they got on the bride and groom’s fingers. Ben didn’t drop Rey’s ring over the balcony, and for that he was pleasantly surprised. Sliding it onto her finger made his heart skip. And as her fingers slid his onto him, he felt it settle in him. This was it. He was hers forever.

“You may kiss the bride.”

Ben’s favorite part.

He dipped down, slid his fingers behind her head and cupped her jaw to guide her to his kiss. That heavenly bliss, her sweet lips merged with his, her soul merged with his, together as one. Rey, his beautiful wife that he loved endlessly, would be with him forever.

He dropped his hand to her lower back and lifted her up into a twirl aided with the Force, still kissing her, never wanting to stop. The guests cheered, claps and whistles and AH-GAAAH from Rey’s side of the family, who definitely were not going to hurt him at any point this day.

Ben broke from her kiss and delighted in that haze about her eyes, savored her huge, incredible smile that was the light in his galaxy. He pulled her against him and smiled at their family and friends, happier than he’d ever been in his life.

#

Leave it to his mother to charm the space pirates. Han certainly kept them laughing in conversation, and Leia made them feel right at home.

Maybe they weren’t so bad after all.

As Ben and Rey neared the pirates, Shirac stood with his arms wide. Ben cringed internally but didn’t dare show it.

“My girl!” Shirac hugged Rey. Then he pulled Ben into the hug and honestly, Ben wasn’t sure how Rey survived these things. “And now my boy. If you’re with Rey, then you win my favor.” Shirac let them go and pointed. “You treat her good now. Never let me hear you hurt her in any way.”

Ben vehemently shook his head. “Oh no sir, I would never hurt her.”

Rey laughed and slapped a hand onto Shirac’s chest. “Like anyone could ever hurt me!”

Shirac laughed and slapped Ben on the back again. Those suckers really hurt! “What am I saying?! I ought to be telling her not to hurt you!” After another hearty laugh, he crossed his arms. “Ah my girl, enjoy the rest of your wedding day, huh?”

“You’re leaving?”

Shirac leaned in. “Ah, you know we party a bit different from these fine folk. Tell you what. We’ll stay docked here, have our own little celebration on the ship. If you want to come visit, you come. No pressure.”

Rey smiled. “Thank you, Shirac.”

He gathered his crew, and they strode off laughing, cheering and crying, “AH-GAAAH!”

Rey linked her hands behind Ben’s neck. “Thank you so much for being so nice to them. I know they’re not like your family, but…” She shrugged. “…they’re where I came from.”

Ben slid his hands to the small of her back and pulled her against him. “Well, they scared the ever-living crap out of me—” He laughed along with her. “—but they’re a part of you, and that’s all I need. Does Shirac know how rough he is?”

“Shirac’s rough?”

Kylo slid up beside them, bowl in his hand, his mouth full. “Heyyy. They got crab in the party room.”

Ben perked. “Oh really? Then what are we waiting for, my blushing bride? Wait—still in the leg or nice and chunky?”

Kylo licked his finger. “Chunky. Mom probably said something.”

Ben grinned. “Well that’s one less thing I have to be afraid of today!”

#

The reception was a never ending swirl of food, chatter, pictures, and occasional dancing (which was a little hard when you didn’t have a screen telling you what to do.) Leia had made sure all the food was up to Ben’s standards and served without touching one another.

As promised before the battle with Palpatine, Ben danced with his mother, so tiny her head barely made it halfway up his chest. She just absolutely glowed in their dance and rested her head against him, wiping more than a few tears along the way. With all that had happened, and all that could have happened should those awful visions had come to pass, it was a treat and a joy to dance with his mommy.

Then Kylo felt left out and had to have his own dance with Leia. He started off so incredibly awkward, but once he got the hang of it, his face took on such sweetness that Ben had to get a snapshot of the two of them.

Han danced with Rey, and after a few sarcastic glances and snickering toward one another, Ben’s heart bubbled to see her lean her head against his father’s chest. Rey even pretended she wasn’t brushing away a tear.

After dessert, Rey tapped Ben’s arm. “I’m gonna go see the gang, bring them some cake.”

Ben nodded. “Sure, no problem. I’ll see you in a bit.”

Time passed, and Ben kept eyeing the ship. Screams, laughter, shouts, and AH-GAAAH! thundered from the creepy vessel. The more time that passed, the more uncomfortable he felt. It ate at him, just plain ate at him.

Kylo stood to his side, staring as well. “Why are you tense? Not like they’re hurting her or anything.” He gave a huff of a laugh. “She’d come out with their heads on her lightsaber if they tried.”

“No, that’s not it. Kylo…” Ben licked his lips.

“What?”

“I should go there. I should be there with her. But they scare the _crap_ out of me. I feel like if I walk in there, they’re going to eat me alive.”

Kylo shrugged and stuffed a cookie into his mouth. “I’ll go with you. I won’t let them hurt you.”

Ben hung his head. “I’m such a coward.”

Kylo’s intense gaze bore into him. “No you’re not.”

Ben sighed. “Yeah I am. Look at me, just standing here shaking.” He kept his head down until he felt the weight of his brother’s glare and turned to look at him.

Kylo looked pissed. “No. You are not. Ever.”

Ben wasn’t so sure about that. Kylo was starting to scare him with that intensity of his. Then he realized Kylo wasn’t trying to frighten him. Kylo just believed in him so much more than Ben ever believed in himself, maybe because Ben did the same for Kylo all the time. He smiled and put his arm around the younger man. “Okay, fine, I’m not. But I’ll sure feel better with you beside me, just being my brother.”

Kylo softened, smiled, and put his arm around Ben. “I can do that.”

#

Ben did _not_ know what to make of what he was seeing when he and Kylo entered the Rock-Hound ship. Rey was blindfolded, hands behind her back, holding the tip of a bottle in her mouth. His heart pounded in his chest.

Across the ship, two pirates held up bulky guns with enormous barrels. What the hell were they doing to her? Were…they going to shoot her?!

Ben sucked in a deep breath to scream as he drew in on the Force toward his hand. The pirates fired, and right as Ben was about to blast them all across the ship, Rey tipped her head up as the same time she drew her guns. Liquid poured into her mouth and the projectiles from the giant guns exploded with her expert blasts.

“AH-GAAAH!” the pirates cheered.

Rey holstered her guns, grabbed the bottle, and pulled off her blindfold. “REFILL!” Her hearty laugh rocked her entire body. Ben had never seen her look so…pirate-y!

She turned and when her eyes met his, the rough, tumbled look about her melted into a broad smile of sheer delight. “Ben!”

He gave a brief wave and smiled.

Rey hitched up her dress and sprinted over. “What’s up? Do you need me for something?”

“N-no, I just…well…wanted to be with you. Here. Get to know your crew.”

Stars sparkled in her eyes. “Really?”

He nodded with a smile and took her hand. “Your world is my world.”

Just as that glorious, glimmering smile danced upon her lips, one of the pirates called out, “And ye brought yer bodyguard along too, eh?” That was met with uproarious laughter.

Rey turned with a snarl upon her face, growling, when Kylo stepped forward. “My brother doesn’t need a bodyguard. I came because I wanted to.”

Another pirate tossed in, “Then I suppose hiding behind you is a term of endearment, then?” More laughter.

Kylo tapped Ben’s arm with the back of his hand. “Show’em.”

Ben gave him a double-take. “Show’em? Show’em what?”

Kylo turned to him, that intense look back in his eyes. “Show them you don’t need me to protect you. In fact, I remember you protecting me from a large group once.”

That seemed unlikely, and then it hit him. Ben eyed the room, full of battle-worn, sometimes haggard, grinning faces, all who were enjoying making him the butt of their jokes. And he’d had enough of that in his life.

But this was Rey’s world, and he wanted to be a part of it for her.

He drew in on the Force and thrust his hands up, lifting the entire crew into the air at once. Shouts of surprise, including from Rey, who started laughing right after. A few hands then went for guns, but Ben whipped his left hand aside and tossed the weapons before anyone could get off a shot.

Kylo crossed his arms and smirked. “See? My brother doesn’t need a bodyguard. You guys might though.”

Now Kylo was just poking the Rancor. Ben bared his teeth to tell him to shut up when the pirates burst into laughter, this time jovial instead of adversarial. Ben let them all down, and they cried out, “AH-GAAAH!”

Shirac waved him forward. “Bring our boy in!”

The pirates circled around the trio and ushered them forward. Ben felt along his bond with Rey to make sure this wasn’t something to be concerned about, but he only felt joy coming from her as she clung to his arm. They stopped before the pirate captain, and honestly, Ben didn’t think Shirac was all that much taller than him, if at all. Yet for some reason, he seemed huge.

“So,” Shirac said, folding his arms, “ya want to run with the crew, eh?”

That’s actually _not_ what Ben wanted, but he had to play this right for Rey’s sake. He glanced down at her. “I married all of Rey, where she is and where she came from. She’s been a huge part of my world, and it’s time I knew hers.”

Rey leaned her head against his arm. “Oh Ben…”

Shirac tipped his head up. “Well then, if you want to know our world, you need to prove you can be a part of it.”

Ben didn’t like the sound of that already. “Um, sure, how?”

The pirates parted and the two with the large-barreled guns took their position at the far end of the ship. Shirac snapped his fingers, and a box was brought forward. The lid flipped open, and inside were two brand new Rock-Hound guns.

“You don’t need to be blindfolded with a drink on your lips,” Shirac said with a laugh, “but show us you can shoot like a pirate, and we’ll make you one of us.”

No. No no no no this could not be happening right now. “Uhhhh, ummmm, what if I—”

Shirac grasped the barrels of the guns and shoved the handles toward him. “Show us you’re worthy of the hand of a pirate.”

Ben pressed out a thin-lipped smile and grasped the handles. _REYYYYYY! HELP!_

“And don’t go cheating with the Force or nothing. We’ll be watching.”

Ben wished he still had a mental link with Kylo to convince him to go outside, switch shirts, and let his brother do this impossible task. In fact, he turned to look at Kylo and only got a mix of horror and dread in return. Kylo had been a full witness to Ben’s ineptitude at marksmanship.

Ben turned to Rey instead with the same desperation. But she just smiled sweetly and nudged her head toward the target area. “Show them what you got.”

_Rey, I don’t HAVE anything! I’m doomed!_

_Just point and shoot, Ben. Don’t worry about it, just do it._

She must have been drunk. Ben turned and gave Shirac one last goofy grin and turned to the target area. He readied the guns, placed his fingers on the triggers and tried to breathe.

The boom of the guns startled him out of his skin, but his hands pointed and shot of their own accord, blasting the projectiles into dust.

“AH-GAAAH!” the pirates cried. Ben could only stare. He didn’t know what happened. He didn’t know _how_ it happened. But he shot. He actually shot and hit something!

And then the presence he didn’t sense before departed, and he broke into a smile.

 _Thank you,_ he sent to Rey.

_What’s a dyad for?_

“Thatta boy!” Shirac slammed into Ben’s back again, making him lurch forward two steps. “A man worthy of a Rock-Hound!” He snapped his fingers. “Bring forth the gift!”

What Ben saw in the pirate’s hands made him drop all expression in shock. He nearly dropped the guns. Rey gasped beside him and covered her mouth.

A gun-belt. An official Rock-Hound gun-belt.

Shirac grasped it and handed it to him. “You’ll need something to hold those guns in your hands, now won’t ya?”

Ben’s jaw dropped open. “Shirac, sir, I—I can’t—”

“Take it, boy! Show the galaxy you fly with the Rock-Hounds like your wife there.”

Ben turned to Rey, and by the look on her face, if she was anywhere else in the galaxy, she’d have tears in her eyes. So happy, so proud. Ben didn’t really feel like he had earned it, but this meant everything to her.

Ben nodded, slipped the guns into the holsters, and took the belt. Rey helped him fasten it around himself, and once it rode on his hips, Ben had to admit it felt pretty damn powerful. And heavy. How the hell did she walk around with this all the time?

Ben smiled up at Shirac. “Thank you, sir.”

Shirac grasped his shoulder, and Ben nearly crumpled to the ground. “No, not thank you. AH-GAAH! Say it, boy!”

“Ah-gah!”

“Naw, with meaning! Like the pirate you are!” He rattled Ben’s shoulder and cried, “AH-GAAH!”

“AH-GAH!”

“AH-GAAAH!” the crew and Rey responded.

Shirac laughed and slammed Ben one more time in the back. Ben was pretty sure his heart stopped for a brief moment. “Thatta boy! Come! Party like the Rock-Hound you are!”

Ben turned to Rey. “Look at that, now I’m two kinds of rockhounds!”

Rey laughed and just shook her head as she took his face in her hands. “Oh Ben, just when I thought I couldn’t love you any more, you just…AH-GAAAH!” She hiked up her dress and leapt onto him. Ben grasped onto her and kissed her before the stomping and cheering pirates.

Kylo tapped Shirac with the back of his hand. “Not for nothing, but I’m a better shot than he is.”

Shirac crossed his arms. “Oh are ya?”

#

Ben did his best to be a part of the festivities on the pirate ship, even if they were a bit too loud, too drunk, and too crowded. Kylo, on the other hand, sporting a new gun-belt of his own, let himself go in the rough and tumble group and seemed to be having the time of his life. He’d gotten into about three fights so far, but apparently that was a normal and healthy thing on a pirate ship, a cheered and respected pastime.

That had to have been Kylo’s favorite part—a place where it was welcomed to be aggressive, though he had to admonish them not to hit him in the face due to the movie he was filming.

Rey was definitely drunk and far more wild than he’d ever seen her, but it was a refreshing experience to see her in her element. She always said she didn’t change herself for anyone, but honestly she had. She had chosen to integrate into his world, make her own place in it, and adjust to a different mode of being than she had grown up in.

But these were her roots, and now that he understood them, became a part of them, he felt like he finally had all of her, that he had married all of her.

As the evening came to an end, Shirac walked Ben, Rey, and Kylo down the exit ramp. “Ya know, my girl, there’s always room for you still on this ship, and your husband, heh—” He slapped Kylo in the arm who barely responded to the gesture (seemed only Ben felt the pain of Shirac.) “—even your old Sith brother here is welcome to run with us. You’re all Rock-Hounds now, ya know.”

Rey slapped her hand hard onto Shirac’s arm in a gesture of endearment. “No can do, Shirac. My place is with Ben. I run with the Solo crew now.”

“Ah, well, if any of you have need of the Rock-Hounds, you call us. You are welcome on this ship at any time.”

“Thanks Shirac, and thank you for coming today. It meant a lot to see the old gang, and to make Ben and Kylo here a part of it.”

“Fight hard out there, girl. Bust faces for the Rock-Hounds!”

“I will.”

She hugged him one more time, then Shirac yanked Ben into one of his bone-crushing hugs. Kylo was the last embrace, and Ben still couldn’t figure out how he was the only one getting hurt.

Shirac climbed back up the ramp and stopped at the entrance to the ship. He thrust his fist up. “AH-GAAAH!”

“AH-GAAAH!” the trio responded.

The ramp withdrew, and the ship powered up. Once it had lifted and taken off out of the atmosphere, Rey wrapped her arms around Ben. “Thank you for coming on there. You don’t know what that meant to me, especially knowing how scared you must have been.”

“Oh I was terrified.” He laughed along with her. “But Kylo said I wasn’t a coward, and he scared me so much it seemed safer to go on the ship with the space pirates.” Kylo laughed beside him. “But, I know this meant a lot to you, and I wanted to be a part of everything with you, just like you play Caverns and Rancors with me and got all fancy and goopy for the symposium. We come from very different worlds, but we’re always best when we come together.”

She hugged him, and he kissed her head. “We are. You are the best husband a space pirate could ever have.”

“And you are the most incredible wife a giant goofy nerd could ever dream of.”

Beneath the glow of the three moons of Naboo, Ben kissed her sweet and precious lips.

#

Their bridal room at the manor was fit for royalty, and Rey supposed that was true for the two of them now. Ben had the lineage even if it didn’t mean much anymore. Technically, she was now a princess, and she nearly fell over laughing over that idea as she unclasped her shoulder armor.

The tipsiness had worn down already since the reception. It was nice being with the old gang again, especially seeing them accept Ben—and Ben accept them. She had always wondered, in the back of her mind, if he could accept all that she was, including what once was the closest thing she had to family. Her crew had never loved her like Leia, Han, Chewbacca, and even Kylo did, but they were the people that shaped and fought beside her.

Poor thing, Ben was so frightened when they first showed up. It almost hurt for a moment. He got a firsthand look at her roots and really couldn’t handle it.

But Ben, always her precious Ben, later walked onto the pirate ship of his own volition, terrified, and did it anyway. For her. She knew when he walked on board that he was saying, _This is you, and I want to be a part of who you are even if I should probably go hide under a rock._

And when Shirac gave him the gun-belt…that was everything. It was like she married Ben in his world and married him again in hers. She could see how much Ben knew the significance of such a gift, and he treated it with utter respect that made her just love him even more.

Her prince, be it of planet, pirate, or polymer.

Rey found him on the balcony. A gentle wind kicked up and billowed his cape, his fluffy swirls of hair dancing along with it. She stepped out and stopped beside him to look over the landscape. Multi-colored lights shone onto the waterfalls surrounding the property, and a light cool mist wafted on the wind.

She placed her hand upon his giant one and looked up at him. Sweet, dark eyes left the waterfalls and turned toward her with such an angelic look upon his face.

“Today has been a dream come true,” Ben said. He shook his head. “When I came out of the suite and walked that path, all I saw were flowers and waterfalls. I thought, ‘This is the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced.’ And then I turned the corner and saw just you…” He closed his eyes, a smile upon his face. “Like magic. Like the universe exploding into existence. You were the most incredibly beautiful thing to ever exist in this dimension and any others. I thought to myself, how? How did I get so lucky as to have this woman as my bride? This…exquisite jewel wants to love me forever.” He gathered her hands and drew them up to his chest. “I’ll never forget for the rest of my life how you looked in that moment, how I felt looking at you.” He slid his hands down her back. “You made me the happiest man to ever exist the moment you said, ‘I do.’”

Rey slipped her hands behind his neck and twiddled his silky smooth waves in her fingers. “You have no idea what you did to me the moment I saw you, with that cape flowing behind you, walking like the prince of the galaxy—”

Ben snorted into laughter. “I can’t even begin to imagine myself as prince of the galaxy. I barely manage to handle being CEO.”

“Oh but you look the part, even if you don’t feel it. I do like the cape. That was a nice touch.”

Ben pressed against her body. “I wore it just for you. I knew you’d like it.”

“I went with the silvery blue lace for you, because I know how much you like blue.”

His smile could melt a thousand icy hearts. He leaned his forehead against hers and exhaled. “Stars, I love you so much, Rey.”

“Show me,” she whispered. Her eyes met his. “Show me how much you love me.”

Ben tilted his head back with a deliciously soft smile. Moments later, he scooped her into his arms. There, before the waterfalls of Naboo, she slid her fingers into that silken, raven mane and kissed those luscious lips. She didn’t care what he said. He’d always be her prince.

Her tall, thick, muscular sovereign carried her into the room and set her down. With a flick of his hand, the curtains closed over the glass doors and windows of the balcony.

Those giant hands went for her gun-belt. Again, with care and reverence, his onyx eyes locked on hers, he slid the straps out of the buckle and relieved her of its weight, its protection. She might as well have been naked without it, even if she was fully clothed. To be this vulnerable before another required the utmost of trust, and she knew how much he respected that part of her.

Ben set it down on the table and placed his beside hers. He returned behind her, like a glorious mountain at her back, protecting her from the elements. He drew down the zipper of her dress, and the fabric fell away from her body, leaving just her lacy panties and thigh-high stockings.

His fingers slid over the fabric of both while he kissed her neck and shoulder, her body tingling as his hot breath skated across her skin. Then those giant hands coursed up over her stomach and gathered her breasts while he pressed up against her from behind. For someone with his nose stuck in a chemistry kit or electronics most of the day, he exuded sex appeal in tidal waves.

He made his way in front of her for a long, deep kiss that just melted her into oblivion. Then soft, little wet kisses on her cheek, down her jaw, along her neck down to each breast where he gave her nipples each a sweet suckle before those kisses coursed down, down, right to her silky mound still wrapped in lace and satin.

Ben looked up at her, and if it was possible to fall in love all over again on your wedding night, then that’s what she felt in that moment. His black cape spread out behind him, the blue of his uniform stark against his skin. On one knee, dressed in his regal finery, his dark eyes gazed from a face framed by ebony swirls.

“I kneel before your greatness, my pirate queen.” He bowed his head, smooth, shining waves falling around his face.

She slid her fingers under his chin and caught his sweet smile beneath his curtain of hair. “Rise my beloved, for you are no servant. You are king of the stars, master of the mineral kingdom—”

His eyes narrowed in delight as his mouth curled open with a smile. “Ohhhh I like that.”

“—the prince of particle physics—”

“Oh my stars, I love you.”

“—commander of chemistry—”

“I am getting so hot here.”

“—and general of droids everywhere.”

“That’s it. Panties off.” He bit at her underpants and pulled, making her laugh as he snarled them all the way down. She stepped out of the stockings once he whisked those down and waited with her hands on her hips.

Ben rose to his full height, his size so beautifully immense. After a quick release of the clasps holding on his cape, he shrugged out of it, the black fabric falling to the floor in a whoosh. Piece by piece he disrobed, starting at his bracers, moving to his numerous belts, dropping his vest and robes to the floor, all while his sultry eyes stayed locked on hers, that devilishly tantalizing grin about his lips. Boots went flying, pants dropped, and Rey immediately dove at his tight black underpants to nibble at the hardness inside.

Ben gasped and seemed to be fighting with himself over something. No problem, she would take care of the rest. Rey yanked his underpants down, and just as she was about to tongue kiss his little friend, he slipped back from her.

“Not quite yet, my dear,” he said, though he sounded like he wasn’t terribly thrilled to stop. “The night’s only just begun.”

Rey stood with her hand on her hip. “Oh?”

Ben scooped her into his arms once again, his hot skin soothing and soft against hers. “Come with me, my queen. I have a surprise waiting for you.”

He carried her through a door she thought was a closet and realized she hadn’t fully explored their bridal suite. Inside was a candlelit tub full of bubbles and rose petals.

“Fun fact,” Ben said as he made his way down the steps into the water, “hot baths increase serotonin levels, allowing a feel-good response in the body.”

“Ben, you _are_ my feel-good response.”

That sweet smile warmed his face, and he kissed her into heaven once again before setting her into the water. The heat was just perfect, making her body shiver in delight. He dipped in next to her, the water rising a few inches.

Rey sighed as she tipped her head back. “This is perfect.”

“I recorded the temperatures of your showers and baths and averaged out the numbers to program this with the exact temperature, based on local climate and current weather conditions, that would be perfect for you.”

She smiled and slid her leg against his. “You really do think of everything. And I love you for it.”

“You deserve every bit of it.” He leaned down and kissed her once again. “Ah, I have one more thing.” He reached behind him and handed her a glass. “Mom’s favorite vineyard also makes a top label champagne.”

Rey curled her toes in delight. “Ohhhh yes, I can’t wait to try it.”

Ben picked up his own glass that was a third full. He clinked it against hers. “To us and the future we fought so hard for.”

Rey was once again reminded of how this man was not only her prince but also her hero many times over. “And to the love that made it all worth fighting for.”

The softness that warmed his face was just plain delicious. Rey tasted her champagne and if sex was bottled, this would be it. “Ben, it’s fantastic.”

Ben destroyed his in seconds. “I…really want more, but I’ll wait until later. That is incredible.”

Rey tipped the glass to her lips once again. “So what now?”

“Now? We do what we’re usually too busy to do—bask in the enjoyment.”

“Then bask we shall.”

After light talk, giggles, and long periods just staring into one another’s eyes, Ben pulled Rey onto his lap. She lay with her back against his solid chest and tipped her head onto his shoulder. He lathered soap into a thick foam in his hands and smoothed them along her arms, over her chest and breasts.

“Another fun fact,” Ben murmured, his deep voice a soothing hum against her body. “Soap molecules form into tiny clusters when mixed with water, with water-loving ends pointing to the outside. The water-repelling ends gather in the center where they grasp onto the oils on our skin.” He spread the soap along her inner thighs.

“I know a fact that’s even more fun.”

“Oh yeah? What’s that?”

Rey turned in the tub and straddled his waist. “You are so incredibly sexy.”

His sudsy hands slid over her back. “Technically, that’s an opinion—”

Rey put her finger to his lips and shushed him. “No-no-no, it’s a fact. I have documentation to prove it.”

The corners of Ben’s mouth curled up. “Oh yeah? Where’s this documentation?”

“Right here.” She plunged her tongue deep into his mouth and reveled in his soft moans while those giant hands roamed her body amidst slippery suds. She sat up and parked her lower regions over his instant hardness. “Want to know another fun fact?”

Ben tilted his chin up as he grew rigid with his growing need. Hazy, hungry eyes regarded her as he nodded.

She grasped his hands and slid them up to her breasts again. “These beautiful hands of yours are perfectly proportioned to handle my curves. I already did the math. You don’t have to check.”

His jaw quivered. “Tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

“The equations you used to determine the correct proportion.” He closed his eyes and sighed as he arched up against her. “I want to hear it. I want to hear the numbers.”

Rey barely knew how to respond. “Uhhh…forty-five—”

“Oh fuck yes.” He bit his lip.

“Uhhh, plus…fifty?”

“Oh that’s a good number.”

Rey was running out of ideas. “Divided by three…over…twelve—”

“Oh baby, I love your dirty talk, so fucking sexy.”

“To the…fifth power—”

“Ohhh exponents—shit! I need you.” He pulled her against him to lift her from his throbbing manhood and positioned it right at her entrance. As she sunk onto him, he tipped his head back, his chest filling with his deep breaths, throat bobbing with his swallows. “Continue.”

Even as he filled her completely, she couldn’t help but quirk her head in response. “What, seriously? Wouldn’t you rather me fuck you silly?”

Ben nodded. Then his eyes widened with his next statement. “With _numbers._ ”

Rey let out a breath through puffed cheeks. “Okayyyy…times three.”

“Bigger.”

“Times 465,000.”

“Yeah, now we’re talking.”

“Divided by 423.”

“Yessss.” He thrust against her even as she rocked her hips.

“Um…equals…” That was a bad idea. She didn’t even know what she just said.

“2759 rounded up from the decimal.”

Rey dropped her jaw. “Holy shit.”

He tipped his head back and smiled. “You really know how to make me feel good.”

Rey was still baffled and in awe. “I…um…”

Ben sat up, his midnight eyes boring into her, ravenous and almost predatory. “I am going to take you to that bed, and I’m going to make you scream.”

Finally, back to something she understood. “Then what are you waiting for?”

He stuck his finger up, his eyes wide and boyish. “But first…” He shifted her to the edge of the tub, so incredibly strong considering his profession and hobbies. Wasting no time, he buried his head between her legs, his tongue attacking her.

Rey braced her hands against the tile behind her and tipped her head back while his hungry purrs vibrated against her sensitive regions. The pleasure itself was one thing, but the joy was in him. She looked back down to soggy dark waves between her thighs, thick lashes, and that charming long nose just about buried in her crease along with his lips.

She stroked his hair just how he liked and reveled in his soft sigh. Jeweled obsidian eyes turned up to meet hers, hazy and full of the endless love he felt for her.

“You’re so good,” she whispered, running her fingers along his scalp. “How did you get so good at this?”

His mouth barely left her lower lips. “284 separate sources of information on the topic.” He dipped back in and made that incredible motion with his lips and tongue that just overpowered her with pleasure like no other.

Rey moaned and let her head droop. “Oh how do you do that? It’s so good. So good.” She sifted his damp locks between her fingers. “Maybe I’m the one that will make you scream for being such a good boy.”

“Doesn’t take much to make me scream. I’m scared of everything.” He laughed right into her valley.

“Goof.” She gently nudged his ribs with her toes. “What I meant was that I’d like to take you deep into my mouth…” His eyes opened. “…move nice and slow and hot, super slippery, up and down…” He left her mound to stare at her with a draped mouth puffy from his handiwork. “…and then run my tongue all along the tip, slow and delicate, then fast and fluttering, then just suckle right at that top with my lips—”

“TOWELS!” Ben thrust his hand out and the entire stack of towels ripped off of their shelf and flew toward his hand. He managed to grab one, but the rest Rey had to stop mid-air before they pummeled her. He grinned. “Sorry, just got a little—because you—let’s dry up!”

Rey wrapped her towel around her while Ben quickly rubbed at himself like the building was on fire. Before she could get to her legs, Ben scooped her up once more, towel and all, and paused just to look into her eyes.

Damn did she love him.

Those long legs carried her in a dash to the bedroom, and she almost thought he was going to toss her into the bed or jump into it right on top of her. Instead, he stopped at the edge and laid her down like a perfect gentleman, as if she were a fragile, priceless heirloom.

No one she had ever been with was ever as thoughtful as Ben, and he treated her with such respect and devotion from day one.

“Now,” he said, creeping around toward her legs once more, “where was I?”

Rey sat up. “I have a better idea.” She stuck out her hand, and with a yelp, Ben lifted into the air and plopped onto the bed beside her. She crawled to him and draped herself over his stomach. “No reason why we can’t both scream.”

She watched as one of his eyebrows quirked upward in question. She answered by turning toward his rigidly impatient manhood while straddling his upper chest.

“Ohhhh wow,” he said, and she could feel his breaths against her own aching regions.

“Wow indeed,” she whispered against the tip of him before taking it into her mouth. He hissed into a growl that fell into a moan as his head thrust back. She clearly had him spellbound, but that was okay. He’d find his part in the game soon.

One hand braced against his hot, silken skin while her tongue raced against thick smoothness. The fingers of her other hand stroked through his tight curls while he whispered, “Fuck,” over and over. After the initial imbibing of enjoyment, she could feel Ben seeking her out once more with his exploring tongue. Those long fingers of his found their mark as well, and she sighed in delight against his giant thickness.

She enjoyed every taste and ridge of him, accentuated by the rapturous madness he drove into her. Whether it was minutes or forever, they remained bound in mutual gifting until she just needed so much more.

She gave him one last, long lick with a finishing kiss. “Ben, fun fact, I need this beast of yours inside of me right now.”

His head thrust back into the pillows. “F-fun fact, I just—for the—I—when—I can’t even talk straight!”

Rey arched her body to around to face him. He rolled on top of her and growled into her neck with an aggression she rarely saw in him, reminiscent of the old throne room incident. He thrust into her with zero resistance and never ceased those growls with each heaving breath.

His dark eyes were paling, turning to whiskey then honey-gold with the faintest hint of a glow. She felt fire and shadowy darkness rise in him and understood. Baring her teeth in a smile, she let it rise in her, too, and snapped up to bite him on the neck. His aggressive growl of pleasure turned into a roar as he thrust into her faster and darted in to bite her back. Tingles of pain and delight poured down her body right into her pleasure center, driving her right at the edge.

His eyes were on her again, still a light color, still a faint glow, but not fully over to the dark. No, that wasn’t what this was about. He didn’t have to say it, she could feel it.

_Take me as I am, everything that I am, Light and Darkness, Darkness and Light, and merge as one with me forever._

Rey wrapped her legs around his back and pulled him down against her body. He drove his kiss deep into her, merging them into oneness, as that indescribable high of glory crested. His energy flowed into hers, Darkness moving Light moving Darkness in a perpetual circle that sparked the immense power of their dyad, flowing in them, flowing between them. Their cries of transcendence screamed into each other’s mouths until even that was too much. Ben thrust his head back, his hair whipping in an arc as he cried out. Rey could barely suck in enough breath to fuel her own screams, the ones he had promised her.

They had married legally, symbolically, and now physically, and it was beyond anything they had experienced before, despite numerous forays in the bedroom.

Ben remained above her, just breathing, staring into her eyes, droplets of sweat trickling from his ebony locks, sprinkling down upon her skin. She knew what he was feeling, for she felt it too. This moment was everything.

They remained in that space, as if they could never get enough of looking into each other’s eyes, never get enough of that feeling of perfect oneness. His eyes had returned to their soft darkness and boyish sweetness, his lip quivering as he still fought to catch his breath.

Rey traced her fingertips over his sweaty forehead and loved the softness that came over him: sleepy, smiling eyes, nudging his cheek against her touch, that deliciously adorable smile taking over his lips.

His eyes trailed to her neck, and his eyebrows turned up. He lightly fingered the spot that pulsed with her heartbeat. “Oh shit, Rey, did I hurt you?”

She eyed his own bruising spot and cringed. “No, but I think I hurt you.”

“Nah, I love it when you do that. I just…don’t know what came over me when I did it to you. I was just…delirious. Intoxicated with it all.”

She kissed the tip of his nose. “It’s fun sometimes, to play in the Darkness. Especially with someone who understands, and I do.”

“I lost control.”

“No. Not at all. I know that’s always been your fear, but you are a master of yourself. You don’t always see it, but I do. All of it. And I love every bit of who you are.”

“I love every bit of who you _are_ —” He kissed her right cheek. “—who you _were_ —” He kissed her left cheek. “—and who you ever will be.” The last he planted on her lips. With one last sigh and a smile, he tipped and rolled over onto his back.

Rey nuzzled onto his chest and stroked her fingers through the scant curls in the center. “Thank you for always accepting everything that I am. My past, where I came from, who I am and what I’m made of. Even in your deepest of fears about certain parts of it, you still stepped forward and said yes.”

His fingers stroked through her waves. “Of course. I love you. And besides, you did the same for me. You were the only person outside of my mom who ever defended me, but I mean, you would go full lightsaber and Dark power. For _me!_ I never imagined anyone would care about me that much, to just kick everyone’s ass that tried to hurt me.” He kissed her head. “We were made for each other.”

“And across the galaxy we found each other.”

He grasped her hand to touch his ring against hers. “And now we’re forever one.”

“Forever one.” She kissed the soft, smooth warmth of his chest.

_Rey, Ben, and Kylo in their wedding attire (yes Rey HAD to have butterflies, even if it's not exactly pirate-y LOL!) Photo/3D work by spiritspaintbrush.com, @land_a_joy on Twitter_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter (apologies in advance for the spoiler) will feature our happy couple's Reylo baby, so if that's something you don't want to read, just skip to Chapter 26.
> 
> Not for nothing, but I really like how Kylo's pic came out (hoooot!) Real Jedi outfits are really difficult to come by in the 3D sphere (for free anyway LOL) so we had to make do. Maybe Ben and Kylo look a little more pirate-y than space-y, but hey, it's all in good fun!
> 
> I'm hoping to have the art done for the last chapter/Epilogue, as well as a special wedding picture that wasn't ready in time for this update, but if not, please stay subscribed and I'll post an endnote chapter (I'm probably going to post an author's note chapter anyway) to let you know when it's up. Let's just say I wanted Ben Solo - A Galaxy Wars Story to have its own movie poster :)
> 
> Also, join me on Twitter to chat or if you want updates on pics! @shannon_enloe


	25. Squishy Happy Fluff Stuff

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No seriously, Ben, you did have that one coming.
> 
> Ben's nerdiness gets him in trouble when the Skywalker line grows by one more generation.
> 
>   
>    
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning for pregnancy and childbirth. This entire short chapter is centered around it, so you can skip to the next chapter if need be. 
> 
> This chapter will rot your teeth with sugary fluff, except for a tiny little incident Ben brings on himself...

_One and a half years after the wedding…_

“I can’t believe Kylo skipped out on Caverns and Rancors tonight,” Ben said, rolling his polyhedral dice. “He usually gets them to schedule the film shoots around it.”

Rey shrugged. “Maybe they’re on location somewhere remote.”

“But he’s holo-projecting, it shouldn’t matter where he is. You’re telling me he can’t squeeze in at least an hour for our game?”

“Maybe they’re filming some serious scene, who knows. We’ll be fine without him today. What’s next? Come on.”

Ben sighed. “It’s not the same without him.”

“Aw, you really miss him, huh?”

Ben ran his hand through his hair. “It’s a good thing, I know it is. And the holo-projections are fine, just…yeah. I miss him. It’s hard waking up in the morning and he’s not here stuffing his face, laughing at me and Dad fighting.”

“Well, he’s growing up. He has to sprout his wings and fly. It’s what you wanted for him, isn’t it?”

“Of course! I wanted him to live his own happy life. That’s all I wanted. I just…he’s my brother, but he’s also my best friend. He’s always so into everything I do, and I miss seeing that excitement in his eyes. And I miss taking care of him, you know? Watching him grow as a person, like when he’d come home from school and would be so proud of what he accomplished, or like when his play was over and he would just beam. It’s like another piece of his awful past would fall away, replaced by some new joy, and I loved seeing that.” He shook his head. “It’s weird, I know. And it’s not like he’s gone for good. Hell, he could buy himself a mansion right now if he wanted to, but he’d rather come home to us. Just hasn’t been the same without him.”

Rey nodded. “I get you. The two of you had a special relationship. I know he has your parents, but in many ways, you were like a father to him, nurturing him as he grew, and he depended on you in so many ways. And he filled a part of you that you’d been aching for. I’m sure it’s hard to be apart like this.” She smiled. “Well, let’s just continue until we get to a place where he can jump in next time. Come on, next room.”

Ben sighed and rolled again. “You enter a vast chasm, and the mad scientist says, ‘Behold! Many things are here, but only with special eyes can you see.’ What do you do?”

Rey stuck a box in the middle of the projected game board. “I bring forth my secret box of treasures.”

“What the—Rey, that’s not in your inventory. You have to roll for stuff like that.”

“Ohhh Mad Scientist! Seems you are afraid of Slashy McStabface! Perhaps her secret box of treasures is more powerful than all the invisible junk in this room!”

Ben eyed her. What was she up to? “My…invisible junk is rather valuable. Shouldn’t you check your inventory for special goggles or something?”

“No, I think my box of treasures is better than your junk. Why don’t you open it and see?”

Ben flashed his eyes up to her. “Roll for trap.”

She didn’t roll. “No trap.” She nodded toward the box. “Open it, Mad Scientist.”

He smirked, wondering what in the galaxy she was doing. He pulled the lid off the box, stuck his fingers inside, and pulled out a tiny doll. A baby doll, to be precise. A baby…

His heart exploded in excitement. Jaw agape, he stared into her eyes, hoping it was exactly what he thought it was.

Her stony expression finally broke into a full smile. “I guess I should be calling you Dad Scientist from now on.”

Ben screamed as he leapt from his chair and yanked her into his arms. He just as quickly put her down and froze with his hands near her belly. “Oh my stars! I didn’t hurt the baby, did I?”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Oh for the love of—I’m fine! Come here, you big adorkable love of mine.” She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him so long and soft. He gently pulled her body against his, a chill of excitement running through him as her soft belly pressed against his.

He held her head against his chest and just rocked her in his arms. “Oh Rey…oh my stars Rey…I’m so happy. I can’t believe it—I’m going to be a dad!” He buried his tears of joy in her hair. “I’m sorry I’m soaking you.”

“It’s a happy soaking. Besides, we’re both going to have to get used to bodily fluids all over us.”

Ben pulled back. “Ew, really?”

She lightly smacked his chest. “Yeah really.”

He softened and smiled. “I’ll adjust. Anything for our fluffy little cupcake.”

“Oh, we’ve already assigned a food related item to her?”

“Of course! Wait, you mean her as in general or her as in you feel it on the Force.”

Rey tipped her head back. “You tell me, silly.”

Ben slid his hand to her belly and could feel it, clearly and without a doubt. “A little girl. We’re having a little girl. Oh my stars…”

“I’d like to name her after my mother. Reayon.”

“It’s beautiful. I love it. Reayon Solo. How about Reayon Leia Solo?”

“Perfect.” Rey hung her hands behind his neck and swung gently from side to side. “I can’t believe my pirate self is going to be waddling and gigantic.”

“Yeah, my Solo genes may make for some pretty big kids.” They both shared a laugh. “You’ll have to wear your gun-belt low around your hips.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me.” Her mood dropped. “Ben…I know what we did with the gene editing device should have cleared it, but there’s a chance…”

Ben cupped her cheek. “We’ll catch it early. We know what to do now.” He stroked her lips with his thumb. “It will be okay. You get to have a happy future, that was my promise. Don’t waste your energy worrying. I promise I’ll take care of everything, the both of you, no matter what.”

She smiled again. “I know you will. My sweet nerdy hero.”

“Says the woman who told me through Caverns and Rancors.”

“Says the man who proposed to me through Caverns and Rancors.”

“Hey! We get to teach our kids Caverns and Rancors!”

“Wait, kids? One at a time, huh?”

He swayed his hips toward hers. “Juuuuuust saying.”

She giggled and kissed him once more. “Let’s call Kylo now and tell him.”

“I thought he was busy on the set.”

“He’s totally not. I made him wait so I could do this.” She tapped at the holo-projector.

“My sneaky girl.”

“I wanted you to be the first to know.”

Kylo’s image popped into his usual seat. “Why the hell did I have to wait? We always play at 16:00—oh what the hell? You started without me?! What’s with the box?”

“Shut up! Kylo, Ben and I have something to tell you.”

Kylo looked back and forth between them. “You’re not kicking me out of the game, are you?”

“No, stupid.” She slid her arm around Ben’s waist. “Tell him.”

Ben grinned. “We have to change your name, buddy.”

Kylo flopped back in his seat. “I like Deathkill. It’s a cool name! Plus, I kill and create lots of death in this game. It’s an appropriate name!”

“Not in the game, in real life, Uncle Ky.”

Kylo narrowed his eyes. “Why are you calling me uncle? I’m not Dad’s clone, am I?”

Ben rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Kylo, we’re having a baby! Rey’s pregnant. You’re going to be an uncle!”

Kylo’s eyes rolled upwards as he processed this information. Then they widened, his face brightening with joy. “A baby? Like little Ben or Rey running around?”

“That’d be the one,” Rey said.

Kylo laughed. “Oh wow!” Then his smile dropped. “I don’t know how to be an uncle.”

Ben shrugged. “I don’t know how to be a dad.”

Rey added, “I sure as hell don’t know how to be a mom.”

“Well, I mean seriously, the three of us defeated Palpatine and a horde of Sith cultists and saved the galaxy. I think we can figure out how to raise a baby.”

Kylo nodded. “True.”

“Besides, we have Mom, Dad, and Uncle Chewy to help us figure it out.” He smiled at Rey. “We have to go tell them.”

“Um, are we still playing tonight?”

Ben narrowed one eye. “I have a better idea.”

#

Kylo’s projection sat with the family in the living room while Leia sobbed with pure joy, Han poured drinks, and Chewbacca brought in extra pillows for Rey.

Leia gripped Ben’s forearm and shook it. “I’m going to spoil that baby rotten!” She sniffled and wiped her eyes. “You will have to buy another mansion to fit all the goodies I will buy that baby.”

Han snorted and downed his whiskey. “She’s not joking.”

Ben sipped at his half glass (no more!) of that top label Chandrilian wine while Rey enjoyed an incredible juice the house droid made from the fruit in Leia’s gardens.

Chewbacca gurgled a question and Ben answered, “We’re going to name her Reayon after Rey’s mother. Reayon Leia Solo.” Leia broke into more sobs while clutching Ben’s arm. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into a hug. “Aww Mommy—no, Grandmommy!” Leia sobbed even harder into his chest while he rocked her with a smile.

Han chuckled. “Grandfather. Never thought I’d live long enough to see the day.”

Rey giggled. “Thanks to Kylo you almost didn’t.”

Laughter broke out while Kylo’s projection cringed. “Come on! I apologized for that. That…I left that man behind. He died on Kef Bir.”

“Oh pull the drawers out the crack of your ass, I’m just joking. We’re all here.” Her smile took up her entire face. “All of us. That’s all that matters.”

Ben’s thoughts sucked back to the visions he’d had of their possible fate. Leia finally relented, after the whole Palpatine business was done, and shared what her visions had been before they suppressed his powers. Luke, Han, Leia, Ben—all dead, the Skywalker lineage ended forever. So much death and destruction, so many lives wasted, such a dreary end, hope stained with so much blood.

But as he sat pondering it all, he took a hard look at himself. He had been at his full power for a few years now, Light as well as Darkness, and never once did he bend to the desire to become the person in those visions. For a moment he wondered if those visions really would have come to pass, or if he was much stronger than they or even he had given himself credit for.

He filed those thoughts into his mental compartments for another day. Today the Skywalker lineage grew by one more generation, and his family was here to enjoy the clear and sparkling hope for the future.

Ben stepped over, kissed Rey’s forehead, and placed his hand upon her belly. Because of this beautiful and incredible woman, he got to live every dream he’d ever had, and new dreams were just beginning.

#

_The due date has arrived…_

Rey growled into a roar as she bore down. She gripped the pole, helping to support her balance while squatting. If this kid didn’t get out of her soon, she was going to start shoving on the Force.

The midwifery droid checked down below. “We’re almost there! Keep going, Mama!”

“You’re doing so great,” Ben said, pressed up behind her, brushing his hand over her head. To his credit, he didn’t vomit once and only came close to fainting twice.

Leia rubbed a cool, wet cloth over Rey’s face. “Just about there. You can do this.”

Rey bore down once more and gasped for breath. “This is bullshit. I’ve been through life and death skirmishes, can’t tell you how many times I nearly died, and that is nothing, NOTHING compared to this shit!”

Ben pressed something cold against her neck again, and she wondered why he kept doing that. “You are doing so wonderful. What level would you say the pain is now?”

“Not like before, I just…I want this baby OUT!”

“Would you say this part of birth is better or worse than the contractions?”

“Why the fuck do you keep asking me this weird shit?”

“I-I’m just curious. Just…”

She felt something along their bond. He was incapable of keeping things from her. “What the hell have you been up to this entire time?”

“Push!” the droid said.

Rey grunted into another roar but wasn’t letting up. “Answer me!”

“I-I’m just…you know…recording data.” Ben let out an innocent chuckle that sounded anything but.

“For WHAT?!”

“W-well this all got me to thinking, with how much misery you’re in, that maybe we could…”

Rey scrunched her face and pushed again. “COULD WHAT?!”

He was silent for a few moments. “SOLO-Birth: Options in Childbirth.”

Rey turned her furious face in his direction, and he leapt back from her. “Are you conducting experiments on the birth of our daughter to launch a new product line?!”

Ben pressed his lips into a thin line. “Well just think, if we have more, you won’t have to—”

Rey let out a screaming roar that had nothing to do with pushing and sent Ben scrambling to hide behind his mother.

Leia waved him off. “Shoo! For the love of the stars, Ben! This is not the time!” She took up Ben’s place behind Rey and honestly, her wise, strong, and experienced presence was almost more soothing than Ben’s awkward cheerleading. Leia wiped Rey’s forehead again with the wet cloth and embraced her. “Let’s focus on that baby, come on and push again.”

Rey pushed down with all her might and lightly sobbed in exhaustion. She wasn’t sure how long she could continue like this. This baby needs to get OUT ALREADY! She closed her eyes and leaned back onto Leia’s shoulder, so thankful she had a mom there to help her through it, even if her own couldn’t be there in person (though she could feel her in spirit, swearing and cheering and probably drunk on Force wine.)

When she opened her eyes, Ben’s comm grew closer and closer to her face.

That was it.

Rey flung her hand out. Ben screamed and splattered against the wall in the birthing room, landing in a heap with a groan.

Leia shook her head. “You brought that on yourself, Ben.”

“Come on,” the droid said, “another hard push.”

Rey bore down with everything she had in her and felt it before the droid said it.

“Head is out! One more nice big push for the body, Mama. Take a few breaths and give it all you got.”

Rey heaved breaths, not sure she had anything left to give.

Leia must have picked up on it because she smoothed her hand over Rey’s forehead and pushed her hair back. “You can do this, Rey. You are the strongest woman I’ve ever known. The Force is with you and so are we.”

Rey opened her eyes and saw that Ben had returned without his comm. He gave her the most apologetic smile and grasped her hand.

“Let’s meet our baby,” he whispered.

Connected with him once again, the strength of their bond pouring through her, his incredible Light streaming into her, she knew she finally had the strength.

With everything she had, she pushed with all her might, crying out into a fury, and felt the final release as Reayon slipped into the world and into the droid’s waiting hands.

Rey fell back into Leia’s arms in exhaustion and delight, sucking in breaths and rushing with a flow of hormones that set her spirit on fire.

“Congratulations, a beautiful and healthy baby girl,” the droid said.

Rey laughed and felt Leia kiss her and congratulate her before she flopped back into Ben’s arms. She could feel his body shaking with his tears while he kissed her head.

“You did it,” he said into her hair and sniffled. “You did it, Rey. Oh, I love you so much.” Reayon’s little cries lit up the room, and Ben broke into full sobs. “Oh my stars, our baby! Our little baby!”

The droid lay Reayon against Rey’s bare chest and covered them both with a blanket. As Rey held that little squawking body against her skin, all her history as a vicious, bloodthirsty space pirate fell away. Out of the darkness she had birthed this beautiful being of Light that filled her heart in a way that only Ben had before. Being a mother wasn’t high on a space pirate’s priority list, but in that moment it was everything to her.

“Hi Reayon,” she said and broke into her own tears. “My baby, my sweet little baby.”

Ben kissed Rey’s head and brushed his hand over Reayon’s blanketed back. “She’s perfect, just like you.”

Rey finally looked up at him, instantly forgetting his earlier ridiculousness. In his eyes she saw pure magic and happiness that went beyond the stars. He leaned down and kissed her while that little body squirmed in her arms.

#

After the initial bonding time, another droid took the baby from Rey for weight and vitals while her midwifery droid attended to her after-birth needs. Ben used the moment to step over and hug his mom.

“Ohhhh my Ben,” Leia said, being rocked in his arms. “How’s it feel to be a daddy?”

“Surreal.” He laughed. “I just can’t believe it.”

“Well she is just beautiful, like her parents.”

“Like her grandma.”

“Awww, my boy.” She leaned back and cupped his cheek. “I’m so proud of you, the both of you. Congratulations.”

“Thanks Mom.”

The droid stepped over with a bundle. “Here you go, proud Papa.”

Ben almost couldn’t take the baby at first, sure he would do something wrong. But Leia nudged him, and he held out his arms. Leia showed him just how to hold the baby, even though he had practiced, and he was glad for it. Was one thing to hold a doll that you could drop by accident, another to hold your own newborn.

Reayon settled into the crook of his arm, and that’s when it all finally hit him. Her round cheeks, tiny lips, little dark eyes wandering about. And through the Force he could feel her, an energy so vibrant and fiery, sheer perfection, just like her mother.

“Hi Reayon,” Ben said. “I’m your daddy—” His face crumpled, the tears flowing again, but he broke it into laughter. “I’m in love, Mom!”

Leia brushed her fingers over the cap on Reayon’s head. “Oh so am I. She’s so beautiful. Just perfect.”

“Oh I love her so much already. Did you feel like this when I was born?”

Leia nodded toward a very exhausted Rey. “Felt more like her only a lot worse.” She grinned. “But I was just as much in love with you as you are with Reayon.”

“You wanna hold her?”

Leia’s delighted smile lit up her face. “I thought you’d never ask.” She scooped the baby up with expert arms while Ben fumbled stiffly, sure he would drop the kid moments after just getting her. “Oh look at this baby! You are just my sweet fluffy little cupcake, aren’t you?”

Ben laughed. “That’s what I was calling her!”

While Leia cooed all kinds of mush at the baby, Ben dipped into his belt pouch and drew out a swab with a container attached. Once Reayon started mouthing and getting fussy, Ben leaned in with the instrument.

“Oh let me see that sweet baby’s little cheeky.” Ben took a few quick swipes at the inside of Reayon’s mouth. “Daddy has to check his precious little girl’s DNA. Yes he does. Yes he does!” He closed the container over the swab.

The droid stepped over. “Would you like to have us process this for genetic abnormalities?”

Ben stuffed the swab back in the pouch. “No, that stays with Daddy.” He nudged his finger at Reayon’s belly. “Isn’t that right, my little darling? No one gets your DNA but Daddy. That’s right. That’s right!”

#

While Rey was getting settled into a recovery room, Ben brought Reayon out for the rest of the family to see.

“Awww, look at you,” Han said with Reayon in his arms. “You are just one precious little doll.” He huffed. “Just glad for Rey’s sake Reayon’s not a giant like her father. Took your mother forever to recover.”

Leia shook her head. “Tell me about it.”

“Can’t wait to take this little lady up in the Falcon, show her how to pilot it nice and early. Bet she’ll fly it better than you, kid.”

Ben shrugged. “Or just maybe she’ll be like her father, doing calculus by age eight and won’t have _time_ to pilot the Falcon.”

“Nahhh, I see it in this kid. She’s a fighter and full of adventure, just like her mother and granddad. Mark my words, you’ll see.”

Chewbacca took his turn holding Reayon, who nearly disappeared into all that fur. He gave her the sweetest gurgles and coos.

Ben melted watching his giant, fierce uncle be so perfectly gentle with the little girl. “She’s going to love her Uncle Chewy just like me.” Ben smiled and Chewbacca patted him on the head.

Ben finally took Reayon back and found Kylo skulking outside the ring of family. As Ben approached, Kylo’s eyes widened, and he backed up a few steps.

Ben grinned. “Uncle Ky’s turn to hold the baby.”

Kylo whipped his head back and forth. “Ohhhh no. I don’t know what to do with those.”

“You hold her just like I’m holding her. Here, I’ll show you—”

“No-n-no-n-no-n-no—”

Kylo tried to squirm away, but Ben held his legs still on the Force and placed Reayon into his brother’s arms. Kylo held her perfectly, but all he did was stare down like he was holding a bomb.

Reayon made a little gurgling noise and nuzzled toward Kylo’s chest. Ben smiled and rubbed his brother’s back. “See that? She loves her Uncle Ky already.”

Kylo’s stiffness softened, his gaze melting out of that frozen stare of before. “She likes me?”

“ _Loves_ you. Look how happy she is in your arms.”

Kylo’s eyebrows went up, and he let out a soft laugh. “She’s so cute. She’s so…so tiny. So little, so…delicate.” His eyes shifted to another time and place, and Ben could almost feel the flood of emotions pouring through his younger brother. “Do we all start off like this? So small and helpless?”

“Humanoids, yes.”

“I started off like this, too?”

Ben rubbed his brother’s shoulder, sensing where this was going. “Yeah buddy. There was a time when you were just like this sweet little baby here.”

Kylo’s eyes were still distant, but the expressiveness in his face said everything. “So small…so…innocent…” His eyes shifted back to the present and instead of abject fear of the tiny creature in his arms, an incredible warmth took over, such deep love and devotion. He leaned down and kissed Reayon’s knitted cap. “I promise I will never let anyone hurt you. Uncle Ky will always be here for you.”

Ben wrapped his arm around Kylo, who looked at him with the warmest smile. Just as Ben had taken care of him, Kylo found someone to love, care for, and protect as well. Nothing would ever undo Kylo’s past, but he could sure help give someone else a beautiful future.

#

There was something special about finally being home with a new baby. Sleep wasn’t easy to find, but with all the extra hands and Leia’s stark attentiveness, the new parents were tired but not falling over exhausted.

In the oversized, fluffy, nest-like lounge chair, Ben held Rey with Reayon in her arms. In that moment, he finally felt the reality of his incredible new life—his new family centered in the nest of the original one, a new generation to take into the adventures of tomorrow.

Ben received a notification on his comm. He adjusted just slightly so he could read the results of the test he had set in motion in the lab. The data made that last bit of tension in his soul drain into a softened ease.

“What’s up?” Rey asked.

Ben brushed his fingers over Rey’s forehead and rested his hand on Reayon. “Her DNA is clear. Nothing carried over. She’s safe.”

Rey smiled and let out a breath that combined tears of relief with triumph. She nuzzled under his chin, her shoulders shaking in a mixture of crying and laughing in relief. “Thank you, Ben. Thank you for giving me everything.”

Ben kissed her soft skin. “Rey, you are and have always been my everything.” He brushed his hand over Reayon’s head. “And so is she.”

_Sweet Reylo baby pic credit to[ @TheDinkum_Reylo](https://twitter.com/TheDinkum_Reylo) on Twitter_

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our heroes get their happiness they worked so hard for! Yay! So many dreams fulfilled: Leia gets to hold her grandbaby, Han lives to see one, and instead of the Skywalker line ending, it continues without that heavy burden on its shoulders. 
> 
> I'm sure there are many childbirth options in a galaxy far far away, but I opted to show one, the squatting with the pole, that allows for the widest opening of the birth canal. I've heard it referred to as fierce Mama-bear birthing, and thought that fit pirate Rey best.
> 
> How about the relationship between Rey and Leia that grows especially in the last few chapters? Leia really becomes the mom she needs, offering the same devotion she shows Ben. Rey, so fiercely independent, probably never knew she needed this relationship until she found it. I lost my mom a few years before my son was born, but I'm sure she was cheering me on while imbibing in Force beer just like elder Reayon (in fact, my family was more like the pirate side of the wedding.) I'm grateful to have a stepmother who has filled in the role similar to Leia's and deeply empathize with Rey's lingering grief even how many years later.
> 
> Anyone else want to hug Uncle Ky? He's too cute. I'm sure he'll show Reayon the same love and devotion Ben has shown him, and be her most fiercest protector (next to Mama-bear Rey of course.) 
> 
> Next chapter is our epilogue, set 12 years later as Ben looks back on what's happened since then. It will be cute, it will be silly, and it most definitely will be nerdy!


	26. A Baking Dozen, or Looking Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben looks back on the last twelve years.
> 
>   
>    
> 

_Twelve years later…_

Ben swept into the living room and nearly crumpled at the knees from the heavenly aroma wafting in from the kitchen. He took a quick detour to find its source. “Mooooom, is that your special recipe for brownies?”

Reayon looked up from the counter while stirring a bowl. “Grandma’s teaching us how to make them!”

“Yeah,” said ten-year-old Oren Kylo, greasing a pan, “Uncle Ky’s going to be so surprised we made his favorite dessert. Look, I even iced his tray with a big K so he knows it’s for him.”

“Wow!” Ben said. “Uncle Ky is going to absolutely love it!” He stood for a moment just watching the busy kitchen. Twelve-year-old Reayon was the spitting image of her mother and just as fiery, bossing everyone around. She even had Rey’s trademark death-glare. A phenom on the practice battlefield and a perfect shot, she couldn’t wait to join Grandpa’s secret missions just like Mommy.

Oren reminded Ben of Kylo more than anyone, his middle name fitting him to a tee (Ben would never forget the tears in Kylo’s eyes when he learned that would be his nephew’s middle name.) Oren looked just like Ben did as a kid, but boy did he have some serious fire in his veins. Another master of the practice lightsaber, loaded with pure aggression on the training grounds, he approached the art of the Force-Warrior with serious intent. Though Rey and Kylo had to break up more than a few sparring sessions gone out of hand between Oren and Reayon, the two siblings shared a close if occasionally adversarial relationship.

And Oren just _worshiped_ his Uncle Ky.

Two little heads popped up from behind the counter, full of black waves and sporting inquisitive, hazel eyes. Eight-year-old twins Bail Han and Breha Padme couldn’t have been more different from their older siblings if they tried. These little kids were all Ben through and through.

“Grandma,” Bail said, “I want a brownie but I can only have one crunchy side.”

“I can’t have any crunchy sides,” Breha said. “I don’t like crunchy with soft. Fun fact, chocolate contains Phenylethylamine which makes the brain produce endorphins. That’s why we like it so much.”

“And it contains Anandamide which also produces a feeling of well-being.”

“Oh yeah!”

Ben just smiled and melted at the two of them. They were a complete mess on the training grounds, but were thrilled to spend most of their time in Ben’s lab. When they weren’t performing experiments or cataloguing new additions to their collections (Breha got into bugs, yech!) they were content to just sit and talk about the makeup of the universe. Ben bought them a collection of algebra, physics, and chemistry ebooks for their birthday as well as accompanying lab kits. Rey thought they were too young for such things, but they had finished the books before the month was even up. Ben had told her they were capable of reading all the time, and Rey didn’t believe him.

But he knew. He totally knew.

Leia set out the properly cut portions on two plates. “Here you go, my sweet little cookies, just as you like them.”

The twins took their brownies to the table. Breha looked up at Ben. “Daddy, can we go outside and play with our science crate when we’re done?”

“Of course!” Ben said. “But make sure you bring the fire extinguisher with you this time.”

“We will.”

“And not too long, huh? Mommy, Uncle Ky, Grandpa, and Uncle Chewy will be home soon from their…” Ben licked his lips. “…totally safe and legal mission.”

Leia snorted and caught Ben’s eyes with a smirk.

“Daddy?” Oren said. “Can Uncle Ky take me up in the Silencer when he gets home?”

“I wanna go too!” Reayon said. “I want to shoot some asteroids!”

“It’s _my_ turn to shoot asteroids!”

“We can both do it, but I’m going first!”

“No way! You went first last time!”

“Did not!”

“Did too!”

Ben tipped his head forward, firm eyes but light smile on his face. “Kids, what does Daddy always tell you?”

The two grumbling children mumbled, “Siblings shouldn’t fight.”

“That’s right!” He stepped over and hugged both of his eldest children to his chest. “I’m sure Uncle Ky would _love_ to take you up in the Silencer, but let him get settled first, okay? He’s been on a long trip and probably wants to rest a little and get some fresh air before heading back up into space, okay?”

His little ones hugged him back. “Okay Daddy.”

“That’s my fluffy cupcake—” Ben kissed Reayon’s head. “—and my sweet apple pie.” He kissed Oren’s next and let them both go. Then he kissed his mother on the cheek. “Save me a big piece?”

Leia smiled. “I already did, muffin. Center cut, wet center, moist sides, gentle crisp on the top.”

“Aww, you’re the best!”

Ben made his way toward the living room but stopped one more time to look at his children. Four, just like he always wanted, although the twins were a two-for-one deal. After that, Rey declared the factory shut down by penalty of crotch-kick, and Ben didn’t want to test how serious she was about that threat. You didn’t test Rey’s threats.

Watching his mother interact with her grandchildren just warmed his heart. This had been both his and her dream, and she reveled in all those wavy dark heads and varying shades of brown eyes. Even Han had softened quite a bit, telling them all his crazy stories and never once criticizing the twins for their sensitivities or desires. Even his incessant drinking had cut down considerably. And Uncle Chewy? He spent the past decade with little Rey-Bens buried in his fur.

Ben had the life he always dreamed of and so much more he never expected.

#

Ben made his way into the living room, reminiscing about the direction his life had taken since Rey had walked through the door and into his life. He stopped at the wall and eyed the endless framed posters spaced between Kylo’s expressive and emotional art.

The oldest poster and still his favorite was for the movie _Ben Solo, A Galaxy Wars Story._ There was Kylo, looking far more badass than Ben ever did with the title font spread out below him. Ben would never forget the premiere, when the opening crawl popped up, and he saw his name with the scrolling words disappearing into space. He jumped out of his seat and cheered, making an ass of himself, but he didn’t care. First of all, it was a new Galaxy Wars movie. That enough was worthy of a cheer. Second, that was _his_ name up there! _His_ story! Ben had his own Galaxy Wars movie! What wasn’t there to celebrate?

Of course, they took some liberties. Ben was _never_ as cool as Kylo portrayed him, but damn, his brother did an excellent job. Ben even had a few cameos that didn’t require much acting ability since he froze every time he went on set. Regardless, it was incredible, a perfect movie, phenomenal experience, and it shot them into superstardom. Ky Solo became the hottest and most desired actor in the galaxy, scoring numerous action and adventure roles, even some romantic comedies, including a hit series called _Females_. But he was truly lauded by critics for his role in _Breakup Tale,_ where he got to show a full range of emotions he had only begun to understand a little over a decade ago.

The galaxy loved Kylo, and he had so many romantic interests as well as an army of drooling fans that worshiped the ground he walked on. For someone who had endured so much pain and mental scarring, he was having the time of his life.

Ben’s favorite movie series was framed in the next poster, and this one showed Kylo’s incredible range even more than Galaxy Wars— _The Galaxy Needs a Nerd._ Kylo, as Ben, stood holding a beaker, sporting a big smile, and wearing the long sleeved black shirt, black pants, and the cross belts with the lightsaber over his shoulder. Livvi Told-Ar reprised her role as Rey and stood next to him with guns blazing while Kylo, played by himself, skulked on the other side.

This series was far more accurate and absolutely hilarious. The actor playing his dad was incredible and won an award for portraying the grumpiest dad in the galaxy. Kylo was almost eerie in how realistically he could portray Ben. He had always wanted to be like his big brother, and boy did he get the opportunity. Ben consulted and verified the accuracy of the science used. The movies sparked a comic book series, of which Ben owned the entire set, on display in his office. After telling the real tale, the series branched off into fictional adventures, keeping the series going on for years. Again, Ben was consulted to fact-check all the math and science used.

The next poster always made Ben smile. Kylo starred as himself in a movie about his life. _Ky Solo, the Lost Brother_ was an incredible hit, and if he didn’t have enough screaming, fainting, salivating fans before, his tragic story turned triumphant made him adored galaxy-wide.

Kylo’s fanfiction and fanart entries way surpassed Ben’s and Rey’s after that one, especially when he let it slip that he reads a lot of them. Fans blew up holonet servers, posting fics in hopes Kylo himself would read them. One writer won a contest where Kylo would read the fic aloud on video. Ben and Rey viewed it and laughed their asses off imagining his fans watching it. Kylo absolutely smoldered, enunciating certain parts in a manner that even made Ben’s cheeks pink.

The next framed picture was an article about Kylo that Ben just had to put on display:

_Ky Solo is an upcoming phenom in the acting world. Known for his incredible intensity and realism, he can transmit his fury with one flare of a nostril and a penetrating stare. While known for being mild and kind off set, his intensity, especially during fighting scenes, would sometimes scare his co-stars._

_Says Livvi Told-Ar: “Ky is absolutely incredible. When the cameras are rolling, it’s almost hard to tell where the character ends and Ky begins. He gives ALL of himself into his role. It can be terrifying at times, especially when you’re fighting against him. You have to sit there and wonder, Is he going to stop? Is he going to hurt me? Here’s this giant, muscular, foreboding mass of a man with eyes that can cut right through you, and you’re this tiny thing against him. But once the director calls cut, the character disappears and here’s this sweet smile and gentle deep voice asking if everything’s okay, telling me how wonderful I’m doing and how proud he is of me. I just love him. He’s remarkable.”_

_When asked about his gentleness off set compared to his fury before the camera, Ky explains: I spent a lot of my life having to be something I wasn’t, to completely turn off who I was in order to survive. So when I become a character, everything is channeled into that character, and especially when we’re talking about a fighting scene, well, that’s my specialty. But when it’s time to put aside that character, I always think back to my older brother, Ben, who helped me find my true self. He was always gentle, understanding, and even though we were the same height, he always seemed just a bit taller. I felt safe with him, that I could fail over and over, but he’d still be there to catch me and help me up. He gave me everything, and if I can give even a little of that to someone else, then I feel like I honor everything he’s done for me._

Ben beamed as he read the article for the 3000th time.

Next to that was a poster that Ben thought was just plain adorable, even if it wasn’t meant to be. After a few years of hounding, Rey agreed to allow a TV series, _Rey the Space Pirate_. She had to keep a few things quiet because there were certain aspects of the pirate industry that were not to be made public (who knew?) But she offered concepts and let the creators provide a fictional story that portrayed her in the right light. Kylo even appeared in a few of them. That also inspired a comic book series, and Ben had those on display in his office.

Rey kept herself busy over the years going on missions with Han and Chewbacca, running a Balanced Force school, and even went into designing her own gun series—SOLO-Rey Weaponry, all while wrangling the four kids alongside Ben. Leia always was there to help, of course, glad to fawn over the little cuties after retiring from politics. With a huge family in the mansion, the kids were never without plenty of adult hands to keep them busy, out of trouble, but most of all, endlessly loved.

The next poster made Ben grin. His autobiography— _Pirates and Polymers, the Ben Solo Story._ It had a professional image of himself, nothing flashy like the other stuff, and he was fine with it. He enjoyed flash, but didn’t really _feel_ flashy. Compared to the other media about him, this book probably came off far duller in comparison, as it went beyond that Palpatine incident and delved more into his education and professional career. Critics found it sweet, inspiring, and impressive. Han said it put him to sleep, but Leia loved it.

All this media attention began to clog the yearly Galacticon event. All the lines for autographs centered around Ben, Rey, and Kylo to the point where, to be fair, Ben decided it was time to create a new event—SOLOcon!

Yes, entertainment and autographs, but also a display of innovation, inventions, and advances in science from around the galaxy. Rey had her SOLO-Rey Weaponry room, Kylo had an endless parade of fans swarming his room, and Ben would divide his time between autographs, product displays, and delivering speeches. The trio also held Force and lightsaber seminars that were wildly popular. And because the three of them were ridiculously successful, all the proceeds went to schools for Force-sensitives and providing lodging for their families so the students never had to leave them behind. Finn and Jannah headed one of those schools on Naboo.

All this while Ben still maintained his insane work ethic, expanding his product line three-fold and providing the base systems for some of the newest technologies on the market. He turned to the display rack that overflowed with awards, though none would ever top that glowing orb floating above the cup that took center stage on the display.

Thinking back to his early days, it was almost inconceivable how dim and hidden his life had been, how he was just a target for harassment, hated by the galaxy, ignored for his efforts, and lived in the shadows of his hero family, never able to measure up to what everyone expected him to be. And because Rey touched his cheek on that very first day (yes, the moment that made him faint,) he was now the brightest star in the galaxy, achieving everything he’d ever dreamed.

He had the love of his life, his family, the accolades of the scientific community, and spectacular movies and media made about him. Ben had always looked up to superheroes. Now he was one, all because one beautiful woman was the Light in his Darkness and used her Darkness to bring out his Light.

Ben smiled and nodded. Life was awesome.

#

Ben could feel Rey and Kylo long before the Millennium Falcon appeared in the sky. He donned his wide-brimmed hat and sunglasses to step outside and wait. Reayon and Oren joined him while the twins were still busy with their experiments in the back of the mansion.

The Falcon lowered from the atmosphere and landed next to the Silencer. Ben stood with his arms crossed, smiling, while Reayon and Oren ran circles around him. The ramp lowered and Rey stepped down, her armor gleaming in the sun. She rolled her eyes and waved off Kylo behind her.

“It’s getting boring out there with you!” she said.

“It’s not my fault!” Kylo barked. He stepped out sporting his slick, designer sunglasses, and Ben wondered how the hell he always kept his hair so perfect. “I can’t help it if I’m sexy, famous, and entertaining all wrapped up in one package!”

“Mommy!” the kids cried and ran toward her.

Rey held her arms out and gathered the two in her embrace. “Oh my babies. How are my darling little mini-pirates?”

“I scored a hundred percent in the shooting simulator!” Reayon said.

“That’s excellent!”

“But Daddy said I had to wait until you were home to practice with the real thing because he’s such a bad shot.”

“That’s true, he is.” She flashed a smirk at Ben. “And what about you, Oren?”

Oren slipped his practice cane out of his belt. “I practiced all my forms and practiced the Force and I SMASHED the training dummy!” He cried out and slammed his cane into the ground repeatedly.

Whatever of Ben’s genes went into making Kylo’s fighting fury, Oren got them in full.

“Good!” Rey said. “Before you know it, you’ll be ready for the real thing.”

Kylo stuck his arms out. “Where are my hugs?”

Reayon leapt onto him from one side, Oren on the other. Ben stuck his finger up to tell them not to crush their uncle beneath their weight, but he just held them in his arms, his giant muscles bulging. Ben flexed and checked his own physique. Hm, maybe he was getting a bit soft.

Kylo laughed in delight at the two smiling faces in his arms, adoring them as if they were his own children.

Oren leaned back and asked, “Uncle Ky? Can you take me up in the Silencer?”

Ben groaned and tipped his head forward. “Oren, what did Daddy say about that?”

Kylo’s kind, loving face never changed. “Buddy, I’d love to take you up in the Silencer. Let Uncle Ky get unpacked and settled, and I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.”

“Me too!” Reayon cried. “I wanna shoot asteroids!”

Oren’s face screwed up. “I want to go first!”

“No I do!”

Kylo shook his head. “Kids, kids, you both know Uncle Ky gets to shoot stuff first, remember?”

“No fair!”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Alright zip it. Where are the twins?”

Ben looked behind him. “Behind the house, I told them you were landing but they keep saying they’re finishing up. BAIL! BREHA! MOMMY’S HOME!” He turned back to her with a grin. “And I think she has some prizes for us!”

Reayon and Oren squirmed out of Kylo’s arms and jumped up and down. “Prizes! Prizes!”

Ben ran over too and joined them in their jumping. “What’d you get me? What’d you get me?”

Rey shook her head with a smile and raised her hands. Small crates flew out of the Falcon. She set one before each kid, set two aside for the twins, and placed the last one in Ben’s waiting hands.

“WOW!” Reayon said as she pulled out her rocks.

Oren held up a blue-green one. “I never had one like this before!”

Ben dug into his crate and withdrew a purple crystal masterpiece. “Ohhhh baby, you know what I like.”

Rey smiled. “Yours are all tested with no reference in the database. I entered the planet, continent, region, and ecosystem they were found in.”

“You are the most perfect wife a scientist could ever have.”

Rey gave the sweetest little shrug. “And that’s not all.” She handed him a clear jar with a fuzzy, glowing mass inside.

Ben turned the jar in his hand, eyeing it in wonder. “What is it?”

“Don’t know. The scanner you gave me says unknown. All I can tell you is it’s from the planet Zorb in the Outer Rim.”

Ben’s breaths picked up. “Is it a plant, animal, fungus?”

Rey rocked on her heels. “Don’t know.”

Ben licked his lips. “Is it dangerous? Sporting unknown diseases or replicating spores that could devastate an entire planetary system?!”

Rey smiled until her eyes were tiny crescents. “No idea!”

Ben screamed into the air and threw his arms around her. “Oh I love you I love you I love you!” He looked back into the jar. “I cannot wait to just POKE at you!”

Rey leaned past him. “BAIL! BREHA! I BROUGHT YOU ROCKS! Where the hell are they? I sense they’re still back there, but why? They always rush the ship when we get back with goodies. Oh yeah, and we picked up the stuff from your space station. More Tor-Flex ready to go.”

“Oh perfect, we’ll take it to headquarters tomorrow.” Ben couldn’t take his eyes off the fuzz. “So what happened up there? Why are you pissed at Kylo?”

Kylo threw his arms up. “It’s not my fault!”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Picture this: there we are in Rotta the Hutt’s lair. Dad’s got his gun aimed, Chewy his bowcaster, I’ve got my lightsaber pointing right at Rotta’s gut _yet again_ and I say to him, ‘What did I tell you last time? Didn’t I warn you? Didn’t I say what I would do to you if you pissed me off again?!’”

“Wait wait wait, did Rotta piss you off or did Dad piss him off?”

“Oh Dad pissed him off first, of course, but Rotta wants to get all, ‘Throw them in the Rancor pit.’ Yeah, like I’m going to let that happen. So I charge in there, bust some heads, and I got my lightsaber on him. Now, here comes Kylo—”

“You should be thanking me!” Kylo spat.

“HERE COMES KYLO screaming in, swinging his lightsaber like a badass. It was almost fun and cool, but then Rotta says—” She deepened her voice. “’—is that Ky Solo?’ And that’s it! That’s the end of the fun.”

Ben shook his head, missing something. “How?”

Kylo tossed his hands in the air. “Rotta wanted my autograph. He says he loves the Galaxy Wars movie about you and all my other movies and said he’d forget everything if I gave him a bunch of autographs and took a selfie with him.” He shrugged. “We solved the problem with no further violence, but _noooo,_ that’s not good enough for you.”

Rey turned to him. “I don’t go on these trips to have fan sessions! I go to kick some ass!”

“Well so do I! I can’t help it if everyone in the galaxy loves me! It’s these arms and abs and my dark brooding stare—”

Han stomped down with Chewbacca behind him. “Are you two still arguing about that?”

Rey tossed her hair back. “Well it was boring.”

“Stars forbid we get out of an altercation alive. Hey, where’s Grandpa’s hugs?”

The two oldest ran into their grandfather’s embrace, then were scooped up into Chewbacca’s arms. Ben finally had a quiet moment to sweep his wife up and spin her in a hug.

He kissed her and then just stared into her hazel eyes. “Missed you, baby.” 

“Missed you too, my giant, delicious scientist.”

Ben rubbed his nose against hers. “How delicious am I?”

“Enough that I plan to have my own special dessert with you later.”

Ben gave her a sexy chuckle. “Ohhh I like the sound of that!”

Kylo poked his arm. “I also enjoy hugs, if you recall.”

Ben let go of Rey with a knowing smile for his brother and grasped Kylo in a fierce hug. “Missed you too, bro.” Kylo, in some ways, would always be Ben’s oldest child. And honestly, he didn’t mind. “By the way, Mom taught her special brownie recipe to the kids. They made you an entire pan just for yourself.”

Kylo yanked back, his mouth tiny. “There have been brownies waiting for me this whole time?”

“Mm hm.”

Kylo blinked, then ran for the house. “MOMMYYYYY! I WANT A BROWNIE!”

Ben put his arm around Rey and she shook her head. “He can be vicious on the battlefield and the most popular and beloved actor of his generation and still…do that.”

Ben chuckled. “That’s our Kylo.”

“Speaking of things that are ours, where are the twins?”

Ben shook his head. “I’m going to go find them.”

#

Ben rounded the corner of the house, and the twins immediately stopped and turned to him, looking entirely too suspicious. “Kids, what’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Bail said.

“We’re just playing,” Breha added.

Ben crossed his arms and tipped his head down, gentle smile upon his face. “Kiiiids, families tell the truth to one another, right?”

Their little shoulders slunk. They finally stepped aside, pulled their crate of science gadgets out of the way, and revealed a glowing rip in the middle of the air.

Ben sighed and tapped his foot, but never lost his smile. “Kids, did you tear a hole through space and time again?”

Bail hung his head. “Sorry Daddy.”

Breha shrugged. “It was an accident.”

“Well,” Ben said, “what do we do when we have an accident with our experiments?”

The twins cheered at once, “We fix it!”

“That’s right! Go get Daddy’s emergency space-time repair kit, and I’ll show you how to fix it.”

“Yayyyy!”

Ben shook his head and stared at the flickering tear between the fabric separating the dimensions of the multi-verse. He rolled his jaw, pursed his lips, and stepped forward. After kneeling, he pawed at the glowing, wavering gash in space and time, eyes wide and bright in anticipation. What he saw inside set his scientific nerves on fire. “Yessss…” He grinned with unmitigated desire. “Yessss! KIDS! Bring Daddy’s portal exploration kit, too! This is a good one!”

Oren ran out of the house. “I get to hold Daddy’s lifeline!”

“Nah ah!” Reayon said right behind him. “You got to hold it the _last_ time!”

“Kids! Kids!” Kylo jogged out, brownie crumbs on his lips. He knelt and drew the two kids to his arms. “No more arguing, huh? Remember? It’s Uncle Ky’s turn to hold Daddy’s lifeline.”

“Awww!”

“No fair!”

“None of that!” Rey yelled as she rounded the edge of the house. “You two can go fetch Daddy’s adventure suit and kit.”

“YAYYY!”

Ben smiled. For a man who at one time couldn’t breathe in front of a woman, he finally had everything he wanted in his life, including vast and new scientific adventures ahead at every turn. He dipped into his pocket, pulled out a bottle of Hyper-Fuel, and downed half of it in one shot.

“Let’s get nerdy!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, we're at the end of our precious journey *sobs* I hope you've enjoyed this little romp that started off with a silly picture and sparked a novel. 
> 
> I wanted this to have a satisfying conclusion but still remain a bit open. I have so many original works to catch up on, plus finishing out another fic not yet posted in the Striking at Shadows series, but who knows. Maybe I'll be inspired to add some more tales in this universe in the future. You can always subscribe to my profile or join me at Twitter @shannon_enloe (or for you folks in the various Facebook groups, you'll see me there with my wild moodboards LOL) to keep up to date also. UPDATE!! "Ky Solo Needs a Nerd," an add-on pack to this story (not quite a sequel) is now available! <https://archiveofourown.org/works/27018817> It's a darker story with a lot more angst yet still humor and banter told from Kylo's point of view taking place after they arrive home on Chandrila. It follows his transformation from broken, angry warlord to beloved superstar as he battles his demons and memories of his terrible past. It's a much bigger tearjerker than this story, but if you love Ky Solo as much as I do and can't get enough of the nerdy Solo family, hop on by!
> 
> But real quick, what I want to say about this chapter is that this fic ends with our heroes and those closest to them still alive and happy and having the good life. TROS, while I enjoyed the spectacle at first and of course seeing Ben as his true self for the first time (not to mention more hot Adam to drool over,) just left me heartbroken and the sequel trilogy gets more and more dreary the more I think about it. So I wanted this fic to be a "Nope, that didn't happen, this did instead" soothing balm, and I'm sure many of you can appreciate an ending where our heroes are actually okay!
> 
> Thank you so much, my many fine readers, for your comments and kudos and taking this journey with me. Your kind praise and interactions have meant the world to me, especially during this isolating pandemic (which this fic has gotten me through without going completely bonkers.) I had so much fun writing it, and whenever the SW universe starts to hurt too much, I just decide that this is my canon now, look at some adorable Adam pics, and soothe that ouch with big, sweet, adorkable nerd Ben.
> 
> PS Ky's autograph up there is a slightly modified Paterson font, tee hee!


	27. Author's Note Reflecting on Galaxy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi fans! I just wanted to add this little tidbit at the end to talk about the story, what went into it, themes I explored, ideas I've scrapped and others I changed, and some other stuff (including a teaser for something at the end and Ben and Rey's favorite wedding pic!)

Hello fans of our nerdy space muffin! I had promised this author’s note a few weeks ago, but I wanted to give time for the readers of the Reylo Fic Recs Book Club a chance to read and interpret the story in their own way without my influence. Also I’ve been delayed in getting a very special pic of our wedding couple! The photographer Ben and Rey hired really wanted to do a good job on their album, so we all had to wait for the final results.

Wow, so first, I have to really thank you all for coming on this journey with me! I never meant for this fic to become so epic, but I always believe a story wants what it wants, and it’s my duty to let it come to life. So this is just a little bit about the story itself, the choices I made, and any other last minute stuff.

**What started this fic?**

Believe it or not, a comment on a photo manip of Charlie Barber trying to open a pickle jar, only the jar was replaced with the Wayfinder. In my eyes it looked like a meek and sweetly mild Ben who was so inept he couldn’t do a simple thing. I imagined him paired up with his complete opposite, a badass, powerful Rey that looked like she stepped out of a post-apocalyptic 80s movie, hair blowing and everything. Basically, the summary of the story at the beginning is pretty much what I commented on the picture, ending it with “I think I just came up with Spaceballs 2.” Another commenter said I should totally write it. I was already writing a followup story in my Striking at Shadows series, a big original series with major space wizard reylo vibes, a romantic comedy reylo/sackler vibes, and trying to rework an original series I’ve been working on for years and hoping to publish this year (I do not trust 2020 so that’s not happening!)

But the story wouldn’t leave my head, and the more I daydreamed about it, the more epic it got. I figured I’d give it a quick try, maybe write a little ridiculous comedic short. That’s why the beginning is extra ridiculous and a bit over the top, I never expected it to get as powerful as it did. But the story started to grow in its own direction, becoming taking on a life of its own, especially when it came to Kylo. I usually work with a general idea of how the story is going to go, what the major arcs will be, and usually that remains even if the detailed story grows. But this one just exploded in a good way LOL! Towards the end I was feeling like I was dragging you readers on for ages before I finally gave you an ending, but based on responses I guess you all enjoyed that LOL!

**About nerdy space muffin Ben**

Our Ben starts off ridiculous to the point of being every nerdy stereotype available. Of course I was inspired by the TV show The Big Bang Theory (especially his fear of animals and bugs) but a lot of his quirks as well as the things he enjoys come from nerdy friends and family, little pieces all collected in one character. Some of my friends and circles of friends are huge into D&D. I was a computer tech for ten years and had a small toolset attached to my belt every day. The special plate, picky food sensitivities, itchy clothes and tags, whining over the littlest things, social anxiety, heartbreak over not being “normal” and treated poorly because of it, clumsiness, sun aversion, all of that is a daily thing in our family and extended family. My son and I watch Young Sheldon together because we find it so relatable to our life.

I was also huge into cosplay when I was younger, before it was ever called cosplay, and boy do I wish I still had the time and energy, because back then the only place to show off my costumes was walking my siblings around at Halloween. No one knew what I was. I’d spend half a year preparing costumes, the Green Power Ranger, Fuu from Magic Knight Rayearth (still my favorite,) various Sailor Moon characters, a Xena-like character with massive heavy body and shoulder armor (before all that nice light foam and plastic stuff was available,) Sesshomaru, etc. All that just to have a mom curl her lip at me, ask what I was, and then praise my boyfriend for his cheesy store-bought costume. Ben’s seriousness about his cosplay comes from a deep well of understanding!

Ben’s arc is, at its core, darkness to light. Even if his energies are more Light than Dark, as we watch his growth, we see how hidden and dim his existence is until the adventure pulls him out of hiding, thrusts him into situations that challenge everything he’s ever thought of for himself, and makes him the hero instead of worshiping them. He goes from the galaxy hating him to everyone loving him, from feeling alone and isolated to having friends, a girlfriend, and a brother that expands his heart in ways he never imagined. It’s not the usual Ben arc of darkness to light, but it’s in there.

How did I ever think of Ben as a giant squishball of sweet fluff? Basically what made me fall in love with Ben and Adam Driver in the first place, those moments in TROS after he revives Rey and just has the sweetest, mushy squishy look about his face and eyes. I have always thought of Kylo as hot, but it was in seeing Ben for the first time that I truly fell in love with the character (and we shall not speak of what happened after, we’ve prevented that from happening, see? The Galaxy Needs a Nerd is now canon and that awful moment never happened!) From that moment Ben has always been a big softie to me, and well, this is wayyyy softer than even my first imaginings LOL!

I know a few readers were a bit shellshocked seeing Alpha-badass-commanding Ben Solo be a scared, inept mush, but that’s why he needed his Rey.

Favorite Ben scene - When Luke is about to strike an unarmed Rey, Ben screams, "NO!" and blasts Luke across the field. He then reaches out, snatches back his lightsaber, and ignites it, ready to defend her when only moments before he had no power or capability to do so. A close second is the entire Star Destroyer scene where he survives and rescues his crew through all his science and tech gags.

**About Rey.**

So yeah, Ben needed a polar opposite to get him through the hazards of the galaxy. TROS left me with a bad disconnect for Rey’s character. TFA she was tough but plucky and cute. TLJ she showed she had some serious power and fury as well as a deep heart. Then TROS…I just wasn’t getting it. Like they wanted to give her an angry edge as she’s tempted by the Dark, but it just was NOT working for me. It was like they tried to make her the perfect embodiment of Light to a detriment but then just made her really angry about it. I don’t know, but I had the hardest time writing Rey in my Striking at Shadows series which is why it’s mostly Ben’s POV.

This Rey is a drawback to my badass female heroes of the past, She-ra and Sarah Conner and Xena. Many of the female protagonists I write in my original works are full of fight yet teeming with compassion. They’ll put you through a wall because you deserve it then give you a bandaid because they really didn’t want to have to hurt you.

Creating Rey as a badass space pirate who’s been through it all and is already tired of your shit gave me a greater freedom to explore her character where she wasn’t locked into the whole stereotype of Light and pure goodness. She doesn’t need anyone to save her (not in battle anyway,) she doesn’t back down, and she will end the fight or die trying. She starts off cold, hard, and intolerant because that’s who she had to become to survive. But as time goes on, we watch her transformation. She too has a darkness to light arc. What was cold and hard becomes soft and vulnerable because Ben sees it in her and loves it. She starts off not giving a damn, expecting a painful death no matter whether she saves the galaxy or doesn’t, and ends up with life, hope, love, and learning that she can be vulnerable and compassionate. And perhaps she did need someone to save her, even if it wasn’t in the conventional sense. Ben saved her life through science and her heart through his pure and endless love. And because she finds that balance, she can use her Dark power as well as Light in a balanced manner, never needing to forsake who she is or what she has.

And with Ben, she also finds the family she had been seeking all her life. The space pirates were her only family for most of it, but they could never be what Leia, Han, and Chewy became for her. With them she never had to sleep with her gun in hand or perform for their acceptance. They just said come home, there’s plenty of room at the table.

Favorite Rey scene - The whole paternity test scene, which is so emotional, and she shows both her wrath as well as her heart, especially when she rips off the door to hold Ben in his darkest hour. A close second would be Rey and Ben trying to find a place to make whoopie and meeting all kinds of chaos, including her infamous, "Looking good there, Han" moment.

**About Han and Chewy**

I know a few readers dropped off because Han was so darn mean. And he was. Granted it was funny but he definitely took things too far. Why oh why did I make him so mean? Well, honestly, as usual, the story wants what it wants. And there was quite a bit of his meanness that wasn’t made up at all, clipped from real life experiences, not always my own, but always real. Han is the embodiment of old tradition, toxic behaviors, the Red Foreman (from That 70s Show) of this story. But his arc is also from darkness to light, as he finally learns to see his son’s brilliance and all it can achieve, all Han refused to see before. Their arguments never cease because damn their banter was just so funny, but even old grumpy Han softens and learns to love in ways he wouldn’t let himself before, and learn that in his efforts to “help,” he had done nothing but harm.

His dynamic with Ben is an interesting one. Ben clearly loves his father even if their relationship is mostly adversarial. It speaks to Ben’s strength that he doesn’t take all of Han’s barbs lying down, even if all he can spit out is a, “Shut up, Dad!” And Han absolutely loves Ben even if he hardly shows it. A product of that old idea of the hard father who won’t hug his child, it takes facing death before he can see how wrong he’s been, how Ben is just as spontaneously heroic as himself, just in ways Han never expected. And in those moments, Ben teaches Han that it’s okay to be soft, vulnerable, and emotional and still be a hero.

Han’s dynamic with Kylo is a whole other story, for obvious “thrown off a bridge” reasons. I think Ben has taught Han to open his heart a bit more, be a little more compassionate. That mixed with his own heart leads him to eventually accept Kylo. Certainly helps that the two of them are more alike than Han and Ben will ever be. Kylo winds up being the son Han had expected, who thankfully didn’t kill him in this story (almost, just almost…)

Finally, Han’s dynamic with Rey is another major growth for him. Rey stands right in his face and forces him to confront his poor behavior head on. As is common with traditional male roles, he’s softer on her because she’s a woman, but she in turn is NOT soft on him! In many ways she is the catalyst for the wakeup call he needs. Despite her constant challenge to him, I think he understands her more than his own son, understands the world she comes from, and even admires how powerful she really is. I’m sure he sees her as the daughter he never had, who would absolutely been on the Falcon with him from day one, maybe even helping him with those pesky Hutts.

Chewy steals a lot of the scenes, especially during the drunk moments LOL! But while he’s clearly tired of Ben’s annoying behaviors, he’s certainly the more sensible of the Falcon pilots, giving Han hell when he deserves it and hugs when Ben (and even Kylo) needs it.

Favorite Han scene - When he realizes everything he's been missing when it comes to Ben and holds him in tears.

Favorite Chewy scene - When he manhandles Ben during the first drunken shenanigans. Or the fork, I can't pick.

**About Leia**

I’ll be honest, at first I didn’t know what to do with her. I knew the sequel trilogy version of Space Mom left me angry and cold, and as a mother I felt the writers really didn’t understand the connection between mother and son. Yes it’s absolutely true that sometimes there are just bad family dynamics, mothers who just can’t be moms to their children and love them unconditionally, kids who for various environmental or medical/mental/emotional reasons turn away from even loving parents, and influences and indoctrination that can pull a child from their family and into harmful groups and circumstances. But for her character, for a story centered on hope, I expected so much more mothering out of Leia that was so poorly handled.

So yeah, in Galaxy we got the uber-indulgent Mommy getting her 30 year old son a cup of milk and fixing his tie while he whines. Our giant, adorable man-child needed a Mommy in his corner that may be tired of all she has to do for him but understands him better than anyone else, his only soft place in a galaxy that was so harsh to him.

But in the first few chapters prior to the group arriving on Ajan Kloss, I still wasn’t sure what I would do with her. I had no real intention at the beginning to have her do much of anything. I even teased the idea of Ben reaching Ajan Kloss to find out she had died to give him the boost he needed to be strong on his own (feel free to scream.) Then as the story progressed and was such an uplifting experience for both myself and readers, I realized I could absolutely NOT DO THAT!! But prior to introducing Kylo, I still wasn’t sure what I was going to do with her. Therefore, the Leia you see from that moment on was grown organically of its own volition. That’s the Leia that _wanted_ to be in this story, the Leia the story and perhaps _we_ needed.

Her character arc took a different turn in this story, where most was from darkness to light. Hers is of sowing and reaping. She may have sheltered Ben, but she knew he needed that shelter. She kept him safe and watered in hopes for the day when he’d finally sprout and become his true self. When this finally happens, she reaps the joy of everything that comes with him, new family, grandchildren, and everyone safe and alive by the end of the story.

Some of my favorite heartfelt moments were writing for Leia. Her compassion and love become the central strength for all involved, even as she’s commanding the Resistance and thinking of her senatorial duties (and smacking Han around, that by far is my favorite Leia moment, because he really did deserve it LOL!) By the end of it I was glad I went in the direction the story wanted to go with her, because it became a healing experience.

Favorite Leia scene - Hands down, when they arrive at Ajan Kloss, and she goes from sweet nurturing cuddly Mom to beating Han senseless, especially this line: "Who the hell you think I banged that night, a fucking Ewok?!”

**About Kylo.**

Oh boy. This guy. You have no idea how different a character he wound up being in this story and the change it made to the overall tale. Kylo was another that grew organically as the story continued and became a fan favorite (and mine as well!) He was always planned to be in it as a clone, that much was solid. Then I was potentially going to have him die on Kef Bir, either saving Ben or saving Rey. But as I looked through Ben’s eyes as he saw Kylo, as someone forced into a circumstance, losing everything around him, having to grow up in horrible conditions compared to Ben, I wound up having compassion for Kylo too and, like Ben, decided that he deserved to live and atone for what he had done (“you can’t do that dead.” SEE DI$NEY? HOW HARD WAS THAT?!)

A second idea had him sacrificing himself in the battle against Palpatine to save Ben for having saved him. But then Kylo just _grew_ on me, and I fell in love with him. An absolute angry mess with no self control but inside he was just a sweet squish that wanted to be loved and have a life of his own. I just could NOT hurt him the more I got to know him. Had he wound up being a one-dimensional background character as I expected he’d be, I would have considered it, but he just grew into this incredible thing I did not expect (and I’m the writer!)

Where the dynamic for most of the story had been the relationship between Ben and Rey, it suddenly became the one between Ben and Kylo, and that’s about where the story got HUGE because I loved exploring the two of them together. Ben is Kylo’s Light and pulls him from the darkness, and Kylo sparks a fatherly instinct in Ben who becomes so much stronger for the opportunity. Ben will always be part man-child, but it’s Kylo that really makes Ben an adult for the first time.

Ben and Kylo are two halves of a whole, another dyad dynamic. Ben and Rey save each other from the darkness, but Ben and Kylo grow each other as they break ground and reach for the light. The two of them basically are a split version of sequel trilogy Kylo/Ben.

Favorite Kylo scene - This is SO hard. Kylo steals so many scenes. If I had to absolutely pick one, it would be the fight on the Death Star scene, where he goes from arch enemy to giving his life to save Rey to comforting Ben. But his drunk scenes and the Caverns and Rancors game are very close seconds.

**About the dyad powers.**

So in TROS we’re introduced to the prophesized dyad in the Force. And its only purpose winds up being a power-up for the villain. Yay.

Ha ha. No. I introduced some dyad power ideas in Striking at Shadows, but I wanted this story to have its own version. And for that I dug into some science stuff, looking for something that would have a parallel. The source of inspiration for how their dyad power works, the Dark energy driving Light driving the Dark in a building sequence was inspired by Maglev technology used in some locomotives around the world, magnetic poles in opposition driving the massive machine forward. There probably were other parallels I could have used, but we’re all train nerds at this house and that idea stuck with me.

Rey reaching through their bond to calm Ben down during the final battle, giving him the idea that they didn’t have to be touching to use their power came rather last minute as I tried to figure out how they were going to trap and destroy Palpatine. I’m sure I spent many showers and dinner prep toying with ideas until finally that clicked and worked perfectly. It’s also a moment where it’s Rey’s softness rather than her badass hardness that saves the day.

What about the triad? I never had full plans with that one, another organic flow. I knew I wanted Ben to see Kylo for the first time in Rey’s bond vision. Then I knew I had to keep the bond until the final battle so the trio could still talk to one another during that insanity. Then I wavered whether to keep it forever or just have it last until the final battle was over. I decided to cut it at that point purely for dramatic reasons, to let Ben and Rey think Kylo didn’t survive the fall into the pit. I really wanted to push Ben to that edge to have him fully realize how much he wound up loving Kylo. It also allowed me to have that moment where Kylo, in his squishy cute way, wonders if he can’t be Ben’s brother anymore now that the bond was broken, and to let them have that moment together. Those scenes were worth cutting the telepathic connection. That and, “Ben told me not to talk with my mouth full!”

**Why did I not have the trio as a threesome?**

I kept laughing whenever I saw comments wondering if there would be a threesome. Honestly, I never thought of it. It just didn’t cross my mind, not because it’s bad or wrong, I just legitimately didn’t think of it. When I did think of it, I realized it just couldn’t fit here. Rey probably _would_ , after all, she did date Kylo maybe even a little more than she let on to Ben. Ben probably _wouldn’t_ as I think he already has so much insecurity it would just break him. He’d probably do it for Rey, but he wouldn’t be happy about it. And Kylo would want Rey more than anything and in the process wind up either hurting Ben or being hurt by it all. But by all means, please have all the threesome fantasies with them you wish or write some inspiration smut!

**Why did Kylo not have a significant other by the end of the story?**

This was done entirely on purpose. I wanted him to be a free agent, to be able to explore, so even you fans could imagine a self-insert with him (dark brooding tortured badass space prince actor and warrior? Yes please!) I basically just wanted him to have his freedom to choose, which was the one thing he was denied most of his life, to just explore and learn, wind up in many sexy situations, maybe find interest in an adoring fan or two. Also, I wanted his future to remain open to any possibility. Finally, I wanted to focus more on his family dynamic who winds up being his lifeline, especially the kids who think he’s the greatest person ever, a love that he can always trust.

**Why did I not go in depth with the other characters (Poe, Rose, droids, etc.)**

Honestly, because this was huge to begin with, and the story itself didn’t call much for it. It wasn’t a slight against any character, but the story goes where it goes. I know Rose and Kaydel barely had a part to play in this, but I did want to add them in as an idea that maybe, just maybe our hardened space pirate might have actually had some female friends.

**And the biggest question, will there ever be any more Galaxy related stories?**

When I started this, I was working on a bunch of projects but really trying to focus on my originals (this is the direction I want my career to go, as I love writing and would prefer to do it full time.) Well, I got really excited for this story but also wanted to finish it as quickly as possible. It was written during the height of Covid in my area, and I had a family member become ill (not with Covid, but significant nonetheless.) With all the uncertainty, whether we’d stay healthy and safe, whether grief would strike, whether jobs would be safe, etc., I wanted to get the story done for you readers before anything happened to derail finishing it. So I dedicated all of my time (in between freelance gigs and parenting) to completing it so I wouldn’t leave anyone hanging for any reason.

Currently, Covid is quieting, family member is still ill but is fighting the good fight, so I’m hopeful but there’s always the potential for creativity to be cut off for any reason.

So in regards to any more material, let’s just say I have been wanting to focus solely on my original work, and yet…

Yet…

With no guarantees as to when I'd be posting, I will say I have been working on something, a bit of an add-on pack for Galaxy. Not quite the heavy comedy of Galaxy, a little darker, more angsty and sentimental because of its protagonist, but definitely not without its laughable moments.

Here’s an excerpt from “Ky Solo Needs a Nerd” UPDATE!! The fic is now live! Just remember, it's darker and far more angsty but you will laugh. If you love Ky, hop on by! <https://archiveofourown.org/works/27018817>

Kylo nodded. He really wanted to do better. He wanted to be worthy of all these beautiful things and kind words and gentle touches.

Leia smiled which filled him with a sense of pride, the good kind, not the one for slaughtering his enemies. Then something caught her attention and she waved him over. “Kylo, here, stick your finger out and come closer to this flower. I want to show you something I can’t show Ben.”

“Why not?”

“Because he won’t even come into the garden unless I force him, too damn scared of everything in it. Here, come closer, nice and slow. See that?”

He wasn’t sure what he was looking at, some sort of flat creature. Then it opened up to show two huge, ornate wings in an electric, luminous blue. His entire body lit with awe.

Leia coaxed his finger forward. “Nice and slow. The _canaba_ butterfly is surprisingly docile as long as you approach it in just the right way. We’ll get nice and close and it will climb onto you. Don’t worry, it can’t hurt you. Only tickles a little.” She guided his finger right underneath it, and moments later, the butterfly climbed on. Kylo lifted his finger and the butterfly flexed its beautiful wings once more.

Kylo let out a soft laugh of joy, amazed that this beautiful creature trusted him enough to be so close and share its beauty. The wings flapped again, and he watched as the colors changed depending on how the light hit it, from greens to purples and all the blue in between.

“Just let it ride your finger,” Leia said, just as joyful as he felt. “Whatever you do, don’t touch its wings. They’re very delicate, and even if we are trying to be gentle, we can do a lot of damage if we don’t handle them right.” She looked up at him. “Some living beings are big and strong, like you and your Uncle Chewy and even Ben, though he does whine every time he bumps his arm or gets a scratch. You can take big, rough hugs and even wrestle like you did with Ben. But some beings are very delicate. They’re not as big and strong as you, and they may not have the capability to use the Force. Just like with this butterfly, we have to be gentle in how we handle them.”

Leia had a way of helping Kylo understand how this new life of his was supposed to work. “Just like I have to be gentle with you, but I can jump on Uncle Chewy with a hug.”

“That’s right. You’re going to start meeting lots of new people on Chandrila, maybe even lots of girls with that handsome face of yours.” Kylo grinned. “Just like with the butterfly, it’s best to be gentle and let them take the lead in how they like to be handled. We always have to respect others’ bodies and boundaries.”

“What are boundaries?”

“Those are places others aren’t allowed to go or touch without our permission.” She grasped his upper arm. “Is it okay if I touch you like this?”

“Of course. You’re my mom.”

Leia smiled, then turned serious as she asked the next question. “And what if an unfamiliar man did the same?”

His mood shot right into the ground. He felt cold and sprung into alert. “I don’t want him touching me.”

“See? That’s a boundary. And everyone’s boundaries are different, but no one likes when they are crossed.”

Again, she put things in ways he could understand. It was hard having to learn all these new ways of interacting with others. “How do I know what someone’s boundaries are?”

“They may tell you, or you can ask. And some are just expected, and we’ll go over those as time goes on. Ah, come, I want to show you one more thing.”

When Kylo turned, the butterfly flapped its wings and lifted into the air, the shifting colors dancing in the light. He’d never seen something so beautiful in his life.

With the exception of Rey of course.

Leia led him to a plant that had holes in its leaves. She stuck her finger out, and on it crawled a long creature with alternating, colorful stripes and lots of legs. “This is the caterpillar for that butterfly. That’s why I planted this bush here, to be a source of food so the _canaba_ always comes back. Here, would you like to hold him?”

Kylo nodded, smiling. Leia touched her finger to his, and the caterpillar moseyed onto his skin. He laughed as it inched its body along.

Leia grinned. “You’re a lot more fun to bring into the garden than your brother, that’s for sure. He would have needed resuscitation by now.”

Kylo eyed the caterpillar in complete fascination. “So this little thing will become that beautiful butterfly?”

“Yep. It will eat and eat and grow, and then it will form a cocoon and transform into its final and most magnificent form.”

Kylo let it crawl back onto the plant, figuring it was probably hungry. He was always hungry. Usually it was for food, but also knowledge and experiences.

Especially love. He’d spent his entire life being starved in so many ways. He understood that caterpillar’s hunger. “Will I be beautiful one day?”

“Ohhhh Kylo.” Leia grasped his cheeks and pulled him down for a kiss on the forehead. “You _are_ beautiful. So is this caterpillar. What you need is to grow a set of beautiful wings and fly as the man you were always meant to be.”

The story will cover Kylo coming home and his life on Chandrila up to the epilogue of Galaxy. It will explore his adjustments, his new and old relationships, his dark moments from his past, and his triumphant rise to success (and yes...his relationship with Melanie...yes I went there...yes it's exactly how it sounds...) This one is especially for the Ky Solo lovers out there, so if you want in on what this story becomes, be sure to subscribe to my author name so you can be alerted when it's available! [It's totally available here!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27018817)

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/shannon_enloe) @shannon_enloe and [ Facebook](https://fb.me/enloeddmedia) @enloeddmedia

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Solo’s Need A Fishing Trip](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29790405) by [BenSoloHands](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BenSoloHands/pseuds/BenSoloHands)




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